# Start End Original Translated
1 00:00:02,176 00:00:04,241 - Previously on Young Sheldon... - Hello, Mrs. Cooper. - Previously on Young Sheldon... - Hello, Mrs. Cooper.
2 00:00:04,265 00:00:05,590 I just wanted to let you know, I just wanted to let you know,
3 00:00:05,614 00:00:07,200 with Dr. Sturgis away, with Dr. Sturgis away,
4 00:00:07,224 00:00:09,724 I'll be available should Sheldon need anything. I'll be available should Sheldon need anything.
5 00:00:09,748 00:00:11,204 Now, I'm not terribly experienced Now, I'm not terribly experienced
6 00:00:11,228 00:00:12,553 around children. around children.
7 00:00:12,577 00:00:13,990 If he needs to use the restroom, If he needs to use the restroom,
8 00:00:14,014 00:00:16,775 I don't have to go in with him, do I? I don't have to go in with him, do I?
9 00:00:16,799 00:00:18,168 I don't need you to babysit me. I don't need you to babysit me.
10 00:00:18,192 00:00:20,083 I'm perfectly self-reliant. I'm perfectly self-reliant.
11 00:00:20,107 00:00:21,519 Then it's good I kept the receipt Then it's good I kept the receipt
12 00:00:21,543 00:00:24,522 for this bottle of bubbles shaped like a bear. for this bottle of bubbles shaped like a bear.
13 00:00:24,546 00:00:26,872 Welcome to the world of philosophy. Welcome to the world of philosophy.
14 00:00:26,896 00:00:28,395 I'm going to teach you I'm going to teach you
15 00:00:28,419 00:00:30,963 that you don't even know what you think you know. that you don't even know what you think you know.
16 00:00:30,987 00:00:32,878 Boy. Boy.
17 00:00:32,902 00:00:35,402 I'm not going to school. Why not? I'm not going to school. Why not?
18 00:00:35,426 00:00:36,746 Because I don't know what's real. Because I don't know what's real.
19 00:00:37,950 00:00:39,493 Nothing matters. Nothing matters.
20 00:00:39,517 00:00:41,258 George?! George?!
21 00:00:45,915 00:00:47,110 All right, All right,
22 00:00:47,134 00:00:48,198 what's the problem here? what's the problem here?
23 00:00:48,222 00:00:50,026 I don't know what's real. I don't know what's real.
24 00:00:50,050 00:00:51,418 That's a fun thing to think about on the way to school. That's a fun thing to think about on the way to school.
25 00:00:51,442 00:00:52,724 Get up and get dressed. Get up and get dressed.
26 00:00:52,748 00:00:54,639 Maybe I'm already dressed. Maybe I'm already dressed.
27 00:00:54,663 00:00:57,120 Maybe I'm wearing a zoot suit and spats. Maybe I'm wearing a zoot suit and spats.
28 00:00:57,144 00:01:00,166 That's a shoe covering that's short for "spatterdasher." That's a shoe covering that's short for "spatterdasher."
29 00:01:00,190 00:01:01,341 Or is it? Or is it?
30 00:01:01,365 00:01:02,995 There's no way to know. There's no way to know.
31 00:01:03,019 00:01:04,866 I don't have time for this nonsense. I don't have time for this nonsense.
32 00:01:04,890 00:01:06,259 What is time? What is time?
33 00:01:06,283 00:01:07,260 What is sense? What is sense?
34 00:01:07,284 00:01:09,088 What is "is"? What is "is"?
35 00:01:09,112 00:01:10,611 Sheldon, I mean it. Sheldon, I mean it.
36 00:01:10,635 00:01:13,005 I remember when things meant things. I remember when things meant things.
37 00:01:13,029 00:01:15,007 All right, I'm gonna count to three. One... All right, I'm gonna count to three. One...
38 00:01:15,031 00:01:17,792 Believing in numbers... that takes me back. Believing in numbers... that takes me back.
39 00:01:17,816 00:01:19,533 Two... To be or not to be. Two... To be or not to be.
40 00:01:19,557 00:01:21,274 Shakespeare was onto something. Shakespeare was onto something.
41 00:01:21,298 00:01:22,884 It's your last chance. It's your last chance.
42 00:01:22,908 00:01:25,104 Have you ever wondered if you're the tongue Have you ever wondered if you're the tongue
43 00:01:25,128 00:01:27,324 of a multidimensional being trying to taste something of a multidimensional being trying to taste something
44 00:01:27,348 00:01:28,871 you can never even understand? you can never even understand?
45 00:01:29,872 00:01:31,395 I have. I have.
46 00:01:35,965 00:01:37,271 I talked to him. I talked to him.
47 00:01:38,228 00:01:39,814 Where is your mother? Where is your mother?
48 00:01:39,838 00:01:41,033 She had to leave for work. She had to leave for work.
49 00:01:41,057 00:01:42,600 I have to work, too. I have to work, too.
50 00:01:42,624 00:01:44,689 You also get to take me to school. You also get to take me to school.
51 00:01:44,713 00:01:46,430 What am I supposed to do about your brother? What am I supposed to do about your brother?
52 00:01:46,454 00:01:47,692 Call me old-fashioned, Call me old-fashioned,
53 00:01:47,716 00:01:49,128 but I say spank him. but I say spank him.
54 00:01:49,152 00:01:50,675 Your mom won't let me. Your mom won't let me.
55 00:02:10,217 00:02:12,238 Okay, I'm here. Okay, I'm here.
56 00:02:12,262 00:02:14,284 What's up? What's up?
57 00:02:14,308 00:02:15,937 Sheldon won't get out of bed, and I'm gonna be late for work. Sheldon won't get out of bed, and I'm gonna be late for work.
58 00:02:15,961 00:02:17,330 He's gonna be late for school. He's gonna be late for school.
59 00:02:17,354 00:02:19,550 So you want me to get him up and drive him? So you want me to get him up and drive him?
60 00:02:19,574 00:02:20,333 Yeah. Yeah.
61 00:02:20,357 00:02:21,856 I like it better I like it better
62 00:02:21,880 00:02:24,144 when I just come eat your food and leave. when I just come eat your food and leave.
63 00:02:25,536 00:02:26,774 Hey, Moon Pie. Hey, Moon Pie.
64 00:02:26,798 00:02:28,559 What's going on here? What's going on here?
65 00:02:28,583 00:02:29,995 That's an excellent question. That's an excellent question.
66 00:02:30,019 00:02:31,562 Too bad there's no answer. Too bad there's no answer.
67 00:02:31,586 00:02:33,172 Well, you need to get out of bed. Well, you need to get out of bed.
68 00:02:33,196 00:02:35,087 I don't need to do anything. I don't need to do anything.
69 00:02:35,111 00:02:36,567 Okay, I'm gonna count to three. Okay, I'm gonna count to three.
70 00:02:36,591 00:02:38,221 Dad already counted to three. Dad already counted to three.
71 00:02:40,464 00:02:41,963 Did he try the Texas thing? Did he try the Texas thing?
72 00:02:41,987 00:02:43,051 No. No.
73 00:02:43,075 00:02:45,097 In that case, In that case,
74 00:02:45,121 00:02:46,098 look at you, look at you,
75 00:02:46,122 00:02:47,795 lyin' there. lyin' there.
76 00:02:47,819 00:02:49,101 When a Texan gets knocked off a horse, When a Texan gets knocked off a horse,
77 00:02:49,125 00:02:50,842 he gets right back on. he gets right back on.
78 00:02:50,866 00:02:52,235 That is the second most important thing That is the second most important thing
79 00:02:52,259 00:02:54,237 about bein' a Texan, about bein' a Texan,
80 00:02:54,261 00:02:57,612 right after thinkin' you're better than everybody else. right after thinkin' you're better than everybody else.
81 00:02:58,917 00:03:00,591 Maybe the horse gets back on the Texan. Maybe the horse gets back on the Texan.
82 00:03:00,615 00:03:01,659 Who's to say? Who's to say?
83 00:03:03,531 00:03:05,248 I don't know what that means. I don't know what that means.
84 00:03:05,272 00:03:07,230 That's because you can't know anything. That's because you can't know anything.
85 00:03:08,884 00:03:10,905 If you need to stare at the ceiling If you need to stare at the ceiling
86 00:03:10,929 00:03:12,516 and contemplate the futility of existence, and contemplate the futility of existence,
87 00:03:12,540 00:03:14,194 Missy's bed is available. Missy's bed is available.
88 00:03:17,545 00:03:18,565 Amazing. Amazing.
89 00:03:18,589 00:03:19,958 What is? What is?
90 00:03:19,982 00:03:22,656 I've been using this same pen for seven months, I've been using this same pen for seven months,
91 00:03:22,680 00:03:24,180 and it's still going. and it's still going.
92 00:03:24,204 00:03:26,007 That's your bar for amazing? That's your bar for amazing?
93 00:03:26,031 00:03:27,922 Yeah. Yeah.
94 00:03:27,946 00:03:29,272 Sad. Sad.
95 00:03:29,296 00:03:31,230 It's the same pen. It's the same pen.
96 00:03:31,254 00:03:33,169 It is too early in the morning for you. It is too early in the morning for you.
97 00:03:34,388 00:03:36,148 Hello. Hello.
98 00:03:36,172 00:03:38,305 Yeah. I'll be down in a bit. Yeah. I'll be down in a bit.
99 00:03:40,307 00:03:41,806 Where ya headed? Where ya headed?
100 00:03:41,830 00:03:43,373 Principal's office. Principal's office.
101 00:03:43,397 00:03:45,592 Ooh, you're in trouble... Ooh, you're in trouble...
102 00:03:45,616 00:03:46,985 You're a child. You're a child.
103 00:03:47,009 00:03:49,403 I'd rather be a child than in trouble. I'd rather be a child than in trouble.
104 00:03:50,491 00:03:52,730 Shelly, Shelly,
105 00:03:52,754 00:03:54,297 Dr. Sturgis is on the line for you. Dr. Sturgis is on the line for you.
106 00:03:54,321 00:03:56,299 Maybe he is, maybe he isn't, Maybe he is, maybe he isn't,
107 00:03:56,323 00:03:57,387 but very well. but very well.
108 00:03:57,411 00:03:59,780 Hello? Hi, Sheldon. Hello? Hi, Sheldon.
109 00:03:59,804 00:04:03,262 I hear you're going through some sort of existential crisis. I hear you're going through some sort of existential crisis.
110 00:04:03,286 00:04:05,003 I suppose so. I suppose so.
111 00:04:05,027 00:04:07,397 I just don't know if we can tell what's real or not. I just don't know if we can tell what's real or not.
112 00:04:07,421 00:04:09,268 And if nothing's real, I don't know And if nothing's real, I don't know
113 00:04:09,292 00:04:11,923 what to think or if I'm even thinking at all. what to think or if I'm even thinking at all.
114 00:04:11,947 00:04:14,447 I went through something similar once. I went through something similar once.
115 00:04:14,471 00:04:16,319 Really? What happened? Really? What happened?
116 00:04:16,343 00:04:19,278 I was trekking through the Amazon, I was trekking through the Amazon,
117 00:04:19,302 00:04:21,498 and I saw two frogs, and I saw two frogs,
118 00:04:21,522 00:04:23,717 one hallucinogenic one hallucinogenic
119 00:04:23,741 00:04:25,545 and the other not. and the other not.
120 00:04:25,569 00:04:29,332 I tried to lick the normal one, I tried to lick the normal one,
121 00:04:29,356 00:04:30,724 and, by mistake, and, by mistake,
122 00:04:30,748 00:04:33,553 I licked the hallucinogenic one. I licked the hallucinogenic one.
123 00:04:33,577 00:04:36,295 It really rocked my world. It really rocked my world.
124 00:04:36,319 00:04:38,863 Why would you lick either of them? Why would you lick either of them?
125 00:04:38,887 00:04:41,300 I'm not sure. Probably low blood sugar. I'm not sure. Probably low blood sugar.
126 00:04:41,324 00:04:42,867 But the point is, But the point is,
127 00:04:42,891 00:04:45,478 I also lost track of reality. I also lost track of reality.
128 00:04:45,502 00:04:47,132 How did you handle it? How did you handle it?
129 00:04:47,156 00:04:49,221 I saw a jaguar, I saw a jaguar,
130 00:04:49,245 00:04:53,138 and I realized I didn't care if it was real or not. and I realized I didn't care if it was real or not.
131 00:04:53,162 00:04:56,054 I just hauled my tushy out of there. I just hauled my tushy out of there.
132 00:04:56,078 00:04:57,969 I appreciate the call. I appreciate the call.
133 00:04:57,993 00:04:59,449 I'm giving you back to my meemaw now. I'm giving you back to my meemaw now.
134 00:04:59,473 00:05:01,126 Bye! Bye!
135 00:05:04,565 00:05:05,542 Hey, John, Hey, John,
136 00:05:05,566 00:05:07,370 any luck? any luck?
137 00:05:07,394 00:05:10,242 Not unless you have access to a jaguar. Not unless you have access to a jaguar.
138 00:05:10,266 00:05:11,809 I don't think I do. I don't think I do.
139 00:05:11,833 00:05:14,855 Really, any jungle cat will do. Really, any jungle cat will do.
140 00:05:14,879 00:05:16,379 Hey, Tom. Hey, Tom.
141 00:05:16,403 00:05:17,728 George. George.
142 00:05:17,752 00:05:19,251 Sheldon's not here anymore. Sheldon's not here anymore.
143 00:05:19,275 00:05:20,905 Thought it'd be a while before I got called back Thought it'd be a while before I got called back
144 00:05:20,929 00:05:22,472 into the principal's office. into the principal's office.
145 00:05:22,496 00:05:24,561 How's he doing? I miss that kid. How's he doing? I miss that kid.
146 00:05:24,585 00:05:27,259 He took a philosophy class and won't get out of bed He took a philosophy class and won't get out of bed
147 00:05:27,283 00:05:29,285 'cause he doesn't know what's real anymore. 'cause he doesn't know what's real anymore.
148 00:05:30,286 00:05:31,698 Anyway, Anyway,
149 00:05:31,722 00:05:33,309 we need to talk about Georgie. we need to talk about Georgie.
150 00:05:33,333 00:05:35,398 Should've seen that coming. Should've seen that coming.
151 00:05:35,422 00:05:37,051 What's wrong? Well, What's wrong? Well,
152 00:05:37,075 00:05:38,749 he's been cutting classes. he's been cutting classes.
153 00:05:38,773 00:05:39,750 Already? Already?
154 00:05:39,774 00:05:41,099 Semester's barely started. Semester's barely started.
155 00:05:41,123 00:05:42,622 He's a go-getter. He's a go-getter.
156 00:05:44,561 00:05:46,041 I'll talk to him.Thanks. I'll talk to him.Thanks.
157 00:05:48,260 00:05:50,195 How's the team looking this year, George? How's the team looking this year, George?
158 00:05:50,219 00:05:52,850 We just had one difficult conversation, Tom. We just had one difficult conversation, Tom.
159 00:05:52,874 00:05:54,895 Let's not have another. Let's not have another.
160 00:05:54,919 00:05:57,071 While my meemaw While my meemaw
161 00:05:57,095 00:05:59,726 wasn't able to acquire a jungle cat, wasn't able to acquire a jungle cat,
162 00:05:59,750 00:06:03,687 the idea of tormenting a child did tickle her Texan fancy. the idea of tormenting a child did tickle her Texan fancy.
163 00:06:03,711 00:06:06,342 Sheldon. Sheldon.
164 00:06:08,063 00:06:11,042 I have someone else who wants to talk to you. I have someone else who wants to talk to you.
165 00:06:11,066 00:06:12,522 What are you doing with that filthy thing? What are you doing with that filthy thing?
166 00:06:12,546 00:06:13,871 Why do you care? Why do you care?
167 00:06:13,895 00:06:15,960 If nothing is real, If nothing is real,
168 00:06:15,984 00:06:17,527 then neither is the chicken. then neither is the chicken.
169 00:06:19,857 00:06:21,835 Good. Good.
170 00:06:21,859 00:06:24,055 We're standing now. That's progress. We're standing now. That's progress.
171 00:06:24,079 00:06:25,361 Get her out of here. Get her out of here.
172 00:06:25,385 00:06:27,363 Well, I would, but Well, I would, but
173 00:06:27,387 00:06:29,147 apparently, apparently,
174 00:06:29,171 00:06:32,368 I can't know what "here" is. I can't know what "here" is.
175 00:06:32,392 00:06:33,847 So maybe I could just So maybe I could just
176 00:06:33,871 00:06:35,022 set her on your bed. set her on your bed.
177 00:06:35,046 00:06:36,676 Okay! Okay. Okay! Okay.
178 00:06:36,700 00:06:37,590 I'll get dressed. I'll get dressed.
179 00:06:37,614 00:06:39,050 Make it snappy. Make it snappy.
180 00:06:40,312 00:06:42,987 This still doesn't solve my existential crisis. This still doesn't solve my existential crisis.
181 00:06:43,011 00:06:44,597 Say what? You want to hold her? Say what? You want to hold her?
182 00:06:44,621 00:06:46,207 No. No.
183 00:06:46,231 00:06:47,774 Less talk. Less talk.
184 00:06:47,798 00:06:49,191 More pants. More pants.
185 00:06:59,157 00:07:00,483 What's your first class? What's your first class?
186 00:07:00,507 00:07:03,355 Solid-State Physics at 11:30. Solid-State Physics at 11:30.
187 00:07:03,379 00:07:05,357 We'll make it just in time. We'll make it just in time.
188 00:07:05,381 00:07:07,315 Although, does... And before you say. Although, does... And before you say.
189 00:07:07,339 00:07:10,057 "Does time even exist?" it does. "Does time even exist?" it does.
190 00:07:10,081 00:07:12,233 So stop wasting mine. So stop wasting mine.
191 00:07:15,913 00:07:17,761 What's this philosophy teacher's name? What's this philosophy teacher's name?
192 00:07:17,785 00:07:19,806 Professor Ericson. Why? Professor Ericson. Why?
193 00:07:19,830 00:07:21,634 I might pop in and say hello. I might pop in and say hello.
194 00:07:21,658 00:07:23,462 Be careful. Be careful.
195 00:07:23,486 00:07:25,943 She may make you question your most deeply held values. She may make you question your most deeply held values.
196 00:07:25,967 00:07:27,945 I'm a stubborn old crank. I'm a stubborn old crank.
197 00:07:27,969 00:07:29,903 I'll do just fine. I'll do just fine.
198 00:07:29,927 00:07:32,210 I'm a stubborn young crank, and it didn't help me. I'm a stubborn young crank, and it didn't help me.
199 00:07:35,759 00:07:36,934 You wanted to see me? You wanted to see me?
200 00:07:38,196 00:07:39,696 Sit down. Sit down.
201 00:07:39,720 00:07:42,176 Is this gonna take long? I need to get to class. Is this gonna take long? I need to get to class.
202 00:07:42,200 00:07:44,004 From what I hear, you don't care about that. From what I hear, you don't care about that.
203 00:07:44,028 00:07:45,073 Now, sit. Now, sit.
204 00:07:50,557 00:07:51,969 What the hell you doin'? What the hell you doin'?
205 00:07:51,993 00:07:54,406 I cut a class. Who cares? I cut a class. Who cares?
206 00:07:54,430 00:07:57,061 It was more than one, and I care. It was more than one, and I care.
207 00:07:57,085 00:07:59,542 You start flunking out, you're gonna get kicked off the team. You start flunking out, you're gonna get kicked off the team.
208 00:07:59,566 00:08:00,978 Fine. Fine.
209 00:08:01,002 00:08:03,197 Now you don't care about football? Now you don't care about football?
210 00:08:03,221 00:08:04,440 Not really. Not really.
211 00:08:05,833 00:08:07,245 I don't know what's going on with you, I don't know what's going on with you,
212 00:08:07,269 00:08:08,899 but you better get your head out of your ass. but you better get your head out of your ass.
213 00:08:08,923 00:08:10,553 Football's a waste of time. Football's a waste of time.
214 00:08:10,577 00:08:12,380 I have a job I could be at. I have a job I could be at.
215 00:08:12,404 00:08:14,804 You made a commitment to the team and you're gonna honor it. You made a commitment to the team and you're gonna honor it.
216 00:08:16,800 00:08:18,715 We done? We done?
217 00:08:20,935 00:08:22,153 Just get back to class. Just get back to class.
218 00:08:24,634 00:08:26,482 And I better see you at practice. And I better see you at practice.
219 00:08:26,506 00:08:28,899 Well, I don't know if I can find it with my head up my ass. Well, I don't know if I can find it with my head up my ass.
220 00:08:30,771 00:08:31,922 So, So,
221 00:08:31,946 00:08:34,054 according to de Broglie, lambda equals "h" according to de Broglie, lambda equals "h"
222 00:08:34,078 00:08:35,210 divided by "m" times what? divided by "m" times what?
223 00:08:36,385 00:08:37,144 Sheldon. Sheldon.
224 00:08:37,168 00:08:38,668 Is it velocity? Is it velocity?
225 00:08:38,692 00:08:39,886 Yes. Now... Yes. Now...
226 00:08:39,910 00:08:41,366 Or is it a velociraptor? Or is it a velociraptor?
227 00:08:41,390 00:08:42,541 I'm sorry? I'm sorry?
228 00:08:42,565 00:08:44,543 Perhaps lambda equals "h" divided Perhaps lambda equals "h" divided
229 00:08:44,567 00:08:46,371 by "m" times a velociraptor. by "m" times a velociraptor.
230 00:08:46,395 00:08:48,852 Or a velveteen rabbit. Or a velveteen rabbit.
231 00:08:48,876 00:08:50,114 Ooh, or Velveeta. Ooh, or Velveeta.
232 00:08:50,138 00:08:51,768 That's the cheese my mom puts on broccoli That's the cheese my mom puts on broccoli
233 00:08:51,792 00:08:53,141 when she's being fancy. when she's being fancy.
234 00:08:54,403 00:08:56,381 Is this from your philosophy class Is this from your philosophy class
235 00:08:56,405 00:08:58,731 or perhaps that Ren & Stumpy I've heard about? or perhaps that Ren & Stumpy I've heard about?
236 00:08:58,755 00:08:59,930 Philosophy. Philosophy.
237 00:09:01,192 00:09:03,257 Mr. Cooper, do you really believe Mr. Cooper, do you really believe
238 00:09:03,281 00:09:06,173 that de Broglie's equation contains Velveeta cheese? that de Broglie's equation contains Velveeta cheese?
239 00:09:06,197 00:09:08,611 I don't know. Maybe hewas just trying to be fancy. I don't know. Maybe hewas just trying to be fancy.
240 00:09:08,635 00:09:10,656 Hello. Hello.
241 00:09:10,680 00:09:12,223 Can I help you? Can I help you?
242 00:09:12,247 00:09:13,877 Hi. I'm Connie Tucker. Hi. I'm Connie Tucker.
243 00:09:13,901 00:09:15,966 I'm Sheldon Cooper's grandmother. I'm Sheldon Cooper's grandmother.
244 00:09:15,990 00:09:18,621 Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you.
245 00:09:18,645 00:09:20,971 He is a remarkable young man. He is a remarkable young man.
246 00:09:20,995 00:09:24,627 Yes, he is. He's also a very impressionable young man. Yes, he is. He's also a very impressionable young man.
247 00:09:24,651 00:09:27,543 Kind of like a lump of clay with a bow tie. Kind of like a lump of clay with a bow tie.
248 00:09:27,567 00:09:30,807 All I did was teach him about epistemology. All I did was teach him about epistemology.
249 00:09:30,831 00:09:32,417 Whatever it is you're teaching him, Whatever it is you're teaching him,
250 00:09:32,441 00:09:35,594 it has made him question everything. it has made him question everything.
251 00:09:35,618 00:09:36,900 That's the goal. That's the goal.
252 00:09:36,924 00:09:38,945 Lady, I had to threaten him with a chicken Lady, I had to threaten him with a chicken
253 00:09:38,969 00:09:41,121 so he'd put his pants on. so he'd put his pants on.
254 00:09:41,145 00:09:43,080 I don't know what's gotten into that kid. I don't know what's gotten into that kid.
255 00:09:43,104 00:09:45,473 He's allowed to not want to play football. He's allowed to not want to play football.
256 00:09:45,497 00:09:48,651 Can you for once in your life take my side, Wayne? Can you for once in your life take my side, Wayne?
257 00:09:48,675 00:09:50,783 Not my fault you're never right. Not my fault you're never right.
258 00:09:50,807 00:09:53,569 So you think it's okay he just quits? So you think it's okay he just quits?
259 00:09:53,593 00:09:55,113 He doesn't get that much playing time. He doesn't get that much playing time.
260 00:09:56,291 00:09:58,835 Well, in my family, we don't quit. Well, in my family, we don't quit.
261 00:09:58,859 00:10:01,838 I don't know. You quit my book club pretty quick. I don't know. You quit my book club pretty quick.
262 00:10:01,862 00:10:04,101 I'm talking about football! I'm talking about football!
263 00:10:04,125 00:10:05,668 Why is it so important to you that he play? Why is it so important to you that he play?
264 00:10:05,692 00:10:07,887 Are you sure you're a coach? Are you sure you're a coach?
265 00:10:07,911 00:10:12,544 Team sports provides confidence, leadership, discipline. Team sports provides confidence, leadership, discipline.
266 00:10:12,568 00:10:13,980 So does holding down a job, So does holding down a job,
267 00:10:14,004 00:10:15,179 which he seems to shine at. which he seems to shine at.
268 00:10:16,441 00:10:18,681 Let's just eat in silence. Let's just eat in silence.
269 00:10:18,705 00:10:20,532 Fine. Fine.
270 00:10:23,971 00:10:26,210 I still think you should have read The Color Purple. I still think you should have read The Color Purple.
271 00:10:26,234 00:10:27,583 We were bawling. We were bawling.
272 00:10:29,498 00:10:31,694 Although tasty, a brick of cheese is not a number. Although tasty, a brick of cheese is not a number.
273 00:10:31,718 00:10:34,174 Why are we still talking about this? Why are we still talking about this?
274 00:10:34,198 00:10:35,741 Maybe we're not talking at all. Maybe we're not talking at all.
275 00:10:35,765 00:10:37,854 Okay, that's enough for today. Okay, that's enough for today.
276 00:10:39,116 00:10:40,877 Not your best lecture. Not your best lecture.
277 00:10:40,901 00:10:42,966 It's fairly normal for first-time It's fairly normal for first-time
278 00:10:42,990 00:10:45,577 philosophy students to have their worldviews shaken. philosophy students to have their worldviews shaken.
279 00:10:45,601 00:10:47,100 Do they snap out of it? Do they snap out of it?
280 00:10:47,124 00:10:49,102 Well, you hope. Well, you hope.
281 00:10:49,126 00:10:52,192 Professor Ericson, I insist... Professor Ericson, I insist...
282 00:10:52,216 00:10:54,717 Hello, Connie. What a pleasant surprise. Hello, Connie. What a pleasant surprise.
283 00:10:54,741 00:10:56,066 Hey. Hey.
284 00:10:56,090 00:10:57,328 I'm sorry you're about to see me I'm sorry you're about to see me
285 00:10:57,352 00:10:58,721 speak harshly to my colleague. speak harshly to my colleague.
286 00:10:58,745 00:11:00,723 Have at it. Professor Ericson, Have at it. Professor Ericson,
287 00:11:00,747 00:11:02,376 I insist that you speak to this young man I insist that you speak to this young man
288 00:11:02,400 00:11:04,465 and explain to him that reality is real, and explain to him that reality is real,
289 00:11:04,489 00:11:06,816 and it's possible to know things as fact. and it's possible to know things as fact.
290 00:11:06,840 00:11:09,166 The class is called "Introduction to Philosophy." The class is called "Introduction to Philosophy."
291 00:11:09,190 00:11:10,471 That's what I did. That's what I did.
292 00:11:10,495 00:11:12,430 Well, un-introduce him. Well, un-introduce him.
293 00:11:12,454 00:11:14,127 Yes, he's at this school 'cause of his brilliant Yes, he's at this school 'cause of his brilliant
294 00:11:14,151 00:11:15,955 scientific mind, and he spent my last class scientific mind, and he spent my last class
295 00:11:15,979 00:11:17,870 talking about processed cheese. talking about processed cheese.
296 00:11:17,894 00:11:19,132 Sheldon, is that true? Sheldon, is that true?
297 00:11:19,156 00:11:20,481 Nothing's true. Nothing's true.
298 00:11:20,505 00:11:22,812 You see what you've done? You broke him. You see what you've done? You broke him.
299 00:11:24,988 00:11:26,424 Hey. Hey.
300 00:11:28,775 00:11:31,057 How come you didn't want to get out of bed this morning? How come you didn't want to get out of bed this morning?
301 00:11:31,081 00:11:34,234 If I can't know what's real, what's the point? If I can't know what's real, what's the point?
302 00:11:34,258 00:11:36,323 You have the right words. You have the right words.
303 00:11:36,347 00:11:39,413 You're just saying them wrong. You're just saying them wrong.
304 00:11:39,437 00:11:42,112 It's not, "What's the point?" It's not, "What's the point?"
305 00:11:42,136 00:11:44,070 It's, "What's the point?" It's, "What's the point?"
306 00:11:44,094 00:11:46,420 I don't understand. I don't understand.
307 00:11:46,444 00:11:49,554 Asking these questions is exciting. Asking these questions is exciting.
308 00:11:49,578 00:11:51,774 It's what gets me out of bed. It's what gets me out of bed.
309 00:11:51,798 00:11:54,646 That's interesting. That's interesting.
310 00:11:54,670 00:11:56,256 Richard Feynman did say Richard Feynman did say
311 00:11:56,280 00:11:57,867 the greatest joy in life is the pleasure of the greatest joy in life is the pleasure of
312 00:11:57,891 00:11:59,433 finding things out. finding things out.
313 00:11:59,457 00:12:01,914 Feynman... he's the physics guy, right? Feynman... he's the physics guy, right?
314 00:12:01,938 00:12:04,332 Yes. And your perfume is beguiling. Yes. And your perfume is beguiling.
315 00:12:05,768 00:12:07,920 It's all making sense to me now. It's all making sense to me now.
316 00:12:07,944 00:12:09,052 Thank you. Thank you.
317 00:12:09,076 00:12:11,184 I am happy to help. I am happy to help.
318 00:12:11,208 00:12:13,056 Dr. Linkletter, I'm dropping your class Dr. Linkletter, I'm dropping your class
319 00:12:13,080 00:12:14,840 and switching my major to philosophy. and switching my major to philosophy.
320 00:12:14,864 00:12:16,561 What? What?
321 00:12:23,917 00:12:25,721 It's funny. This morning, I couldn't get out of bed, It's funny. This morning, I couldn't get out of bed,
322 00:12:25,745 00:12:28,419 and now I stand before a whole new exciting field of study. and now I stand before a whole new exciting field of study.
323 00:12:28,443 00:12:31,727 Well, maybe instead of making this big switch, Well, maybe instead of making this big switch,
324 00:12:31,751 00:12:33,729 you could study both. you could study both.
325 00:12:33,753 00:12:36,688 You could be physics-philosophy guy. You could be physics-philosophy guy.
326 00:12:36,712 00:12:38,603 You sound like a logical positivist. You sound like a logical positivist.
327 00:12:38,627 00:12:40,387 That's a branch of philosophy that maintains That's a branch of philosophy that maintains
328 00:12:40,411 00:12:42,999 the best way to philosophize is through science. the best way to philosophize is through science.
329 00:12:43,023 00:12:45,741 Well, there you go. Do that. Well, there you go. Do that.
330 00:12:45,765 00:12:48,047 It may be too early to specialize. It may be too early to specialize.
331 00:12:48,071 00:12:50,571 I've only been a philosopher for 15 minutes. I've only been a philosopher for 15 minutes.
332 00:12:50,595 00:12:54,314 Did you notice Dr. Linkletter didn't look too thrilled Did you notice Dr. Linkletter didn't look too thrilled
333 00:12:54,338 00:12:56,099 about you leaving science? about you leaving science?
334 00:12:56,123 00:12:57,665 He never looks thrilled about anything. He never looks thrilled about anything.
335 00:12:57,689 00:13:00,146 I think that's just his face. I think that's just his face.
336 00:13:00,170 00:13:03,236 That's the face. That's the face.
337 00:13:07,525 00:13:09,373 Why the hell weren't you at practice? Why the hell weren't you at practice?
338 00:13:09,397 00:13:10,853 Can't talk right now. I'm working. Can't talk right now. I'm working.
339 00:13:10,877 00:13:12,748 Well, you're gonna talk about it. Well, you're gonna talk about it.
340 00:13:13,967 00:13:15,858 What do you want from me? What do you want from me?
341 00:13:15,882 00:13:17,816 I don't want to play football. I want to work. I don't want to play football. I want to work.
342 00:13:17,840 00:13:19,992 You have your whole life to hold down a job. You have your whole life to hold down a job.
343 00:13:20,016 00:13:21,428 Hey, Hey,
344 00:13:21,452 00:13:22,778 I like my job. I like my job.
345 00:13:22,802 00:13:24,455 It's not my problem you hate yours. It's not my problem you hate yours.
346 00:13:30,461 00:13:32,744 Do whatever you want. Do whatever you want.
347 00:13:32,768 00:13:34,877 To figure out To figure out
348 00:13:34,901 00:13:36,879 which school of philosophy suited me best, which school of philosophy suited me best,
349 00:13:36,903 00:13:39,490 I decided to sample each one. I decided to sample each one.
350 00:13:39,514 00:13:42,275 The same way I determined my favorite flavor of oatmeal... The same way I determined my favorite flavor of oatmeal...
351 00:13:42,299 00:13:44,388 Plain. Plain.
352 00:13:47,522 00:13:49,195 What are you doing? What are you doing?
353 00:13:49,219 00:13:51,197 I'm practicing the philosophy of cynicism... I'm practicing the philosophy of cynicism...
354 00:13:51,221 00:13:52,590 The ancient Greek view The ancient Greek view
355 00:13:52,614 00:13:54,940 that the rules of society should be ignored. that the rules of society should be ignored.
356 00:13:54,964 00:13:57,116 If you're gonna break rules, you can do better than that. If you're gonna break rules, you can do better than that.
357 00:13:57,140 00:13:59,118 How? How?
358 00:14:00,927 00:14:02,513 Renaissance humanism is Renaissance humanism is
359 00:14:02,537 00:14:05,603 finding meaning in the human form through art. finding meaning in the human form through art.
360 00:14:05,627 00:14:08,432 Can I move? No. Can I move? No.
361 00:14:08,456 00:14:09,912 But my butt itches. But my butt itches.
362 00:14:09,936 00:14:11,328 Scratch it on your own time. Scratch it on your own time.
363 00:14:14,984 00:14:16,440 Nihilists believe Nihilists believe
364 00:14:16,464 00:14:17,833 that there's no point to anything, that there's no point to anything,
365 00:14:17,857 00:14:19,486 because it all ends in nothingness. because it all ends in nothingness.
366 00:14:19,510 00:14:21,880 Mind if I put on MTV? Mind if I put on MTV?
367 00:14:21,904 00:14:23,534 Doesn't matter. We're all gonna die anyway. Doesn't matter. We're all gonna die anyway.
368 00:14:23,558 00:14:25,928 Deep thought, dingus. Deep thought, dingus.
369 00:14:25,952 00:14:28,191 Traditionalism is the philosophy Traditionalism is the philosophy
370 00:14:28,215 00:14:30,497 that the best way of life is a return to the past. that the best way of life is a return to the past.
371 00:14:30,521 00:14:32,369 What are you doing? What are you doing?
372 00:14:32,393 00:14:35,981 Making my own butter, like in olden times. Making my own butter, like in olden times.
373 00:14:36,005 00:14:37,093 That's stupid. That's stupid.
374 00:14:38,442 00:14:41,334 My arms are still sore. My arms are still sore.
375 00:14:41,358 00:14:43,510 Altruism is the belief that we should live Altruism is the belief that we should live
376 00:14:43,534 00:14:46,035 only by bringing happiness to others. only by bringing happiness to others.
377 00:14:46,059 00:14:47,123 These are for you. These are for you.
378 00:14:47,147 00:14:48,428 Thanks. Thanks.
379 00:14:48,452 00:14:49,821 What the hell?! What the hell?!
380 00:14:49,845 00:14:51,736 Egoism is the belief Egoism is the belief
381 00:14:51,760 00:14:54,391 that we should live only by bringing happiness to ourselves. that we should live only by bringing happiness to ourselves.
382 00:14:54,415 00:14:56,872 These are pretty good. These are pretty good.
383 00:14:56,896 00:14:58,699 Transcendentalists were Transcendentalists were
384 00:14:58,723 00:15:01,354 philosophers who believed that our deepest connection philosophers who believed that our deepest connection
385 00:15:01,378 00:15:03,226 is with nature. is with nature.
386 00:15:11,432 00:15:13,695 I'm beautiful. I'm beautiful.
387 00:15:15,697 00:15:17,066 And then Georgie accuses me And then Georgie accuses me
388 00:15:17,090 00:15:18,937 of hating my job. of hating my job.
389 00:15:18,961 00:15:21,940 Is this where I thought I'd end up? No. Is this where I thought I'd end up? No.
390 00:15:21,964 00:15:23,768 Is this where you thought you'd end up? Is this where you thought you'd end up?
391 00:15:23,792 00:15:25,770 I thought I'd be working at my father's funeral home I thought I'd be working at my father's funeral home
392 00:15:25,794 00:15:27,641 sewing people's eyes shut. sewing people's eyes shut.
393 00:15:27,665 00:15:29,252 My life turned out great. My life turned out great.
394 00:15:29,276 00:15:31,123 Well, good for you. Well, good for you.
395 00:15:32,409 00:15:34,934 The worst part is, I think Georgie's right. The worst part is, I think Georgie's right.
396 00:15:36,370 00:15:38,087 You're not happy at work? You're not happy at work?
397 00:15:38,111 00:15:39,871 I can see if my dad's hiring. I can see if my dad's hiring.
398 00:15:39,895 00:15:41,351 How are your sewing skills? How are your sewing skills?
399 00:15:41,375 00:15:44,180 It's not work. It's not work.
400 00:15:46,032 00:15:47,947 Honestly, I don't know if I'm happy anywhere. Honestly, I don't know if I'm happy anywhere.
401 00:15:51,037 00:15:54,146 When I asked y'all to hang for a drink, When I asked y'all to hang for a drink,
402 00:15:54,170 00:15:56,366 I didn't know you were gonna be such a bummer. I didn't know you were gonna be such a bummer.
403 00:15:59,393 00:16:02,154 Geez Louise. Geez Louise.
404 00:16:13,668 00:16:15,341 Dr. Linkletter? Sheldon. Dr. Linkletter? Sheldon.
405 00:16:15,365 00:16:16,952 Good to see you. Good to see you.
406 00:16:16,976 00:16:18,736 Come on in. I don't suppose Come on in. I don't suppose
407 00:16:18,760 00:16:20,738 you're here to discuss physics, are you? you're here to discuss physics, are you?
408 00:16:20,762 00:16:21,739 As a matter of fact, I am. As a matter of fact, I am.
409 00:16:21,763 00:16:22,958 Excellent. Excellent.
410 00:16:22,982 00:16:24,350 I'm here to drop your class. I'm here to drop your class.
411 00:16:24,374 00:16:25,743 I just need you to sign this. I just need you to sign this.
412 00:16:25,767 00:16:28,267 Have a seat. Have a seat.
413 00:16:28,291 00:16:30,530 Sheldon, Sheldon,
414 00:16:30,554 00:16:32,141 I don't know if you thought this through, I don't know if you thought this through,
415 00:16:32,165 00:16:34,012 but you're here on a physics scholarship, but you're here on a physics scholarship,
416 00:16:34,036 00:16:37,146 and switching to philosophy may not be well-received. and switching to philosophy may not be well-received.
417 00:16:37,170 00:16:38,669 Ordinarily, I'd be concerned, Ordinarily, I'd be concerned,
418 00:16:38,693 00:16:39,931 but I'm currently embracing hedonism. but I'm currently embracing hedonism.
419 00:16:39,955 00:16:41,106 Sheldon, Sheldon,
420 00:16:41,130 00:16:42,673 I've been made responsible for you, I've been made responsible for you,
421 00:16:42,697 00:16:44,457 and so far, it's not going very well. and so far, it's not going very well.
422 00:16:44,481 00:16:45,893 You were admitted to this university You were admitted to this university
423 00:16:45,917 00:16:47,417 for your scientific acumen. for your scientific acumen.
424 00:16:47,441 00:16:50,333 And changing majors could have serious repercussions. And changing majors could have serious repercussions.
425 00:16:50,357 00:16:51,725 Son, Son,
426 00:16:51,749 00:16:53,336 please try to understand. please try to understand.
427 00:16:53,360 00:16:55,077 If you abandon physics for philosophy, If you abandon physics for philosophy,
428 00:16:55,101 00:16:57,253 you're gonna be missing out on the opportunity you're gonna be missing out on the opportunity
429 00:16:57,277 00:16:58,957 to be part of something great. Possibly... to be part of something great. Possibly...
430 00:17:00,323 00:17:02,084 As Dr. Linkletter prattled on, As Dr. Linkletter prattled on,
431 00:17:02,108 00:17:03,563 I couldn't help but notice I couldn't help but notice
432 00:17:03,587 00:17:06,175 the beauty of that ephemeral bubble. the beauty of that ephemeral bubble.
433 00:17:06,199 00:17:09,308 I wondered if perhaps we're all just bubbles, I wondered if perhaps we're all just bubbles,
434 00:17:09,332 00:17:12,181 being buffeted through life on a stream of currents. being buffeted through life on a stream of currents.
435 00:17:14,076 00:17:16,402 Look at it. The local minimization achieves Look at it. The local minimization achieves
436 00:17:16,426 00:17:19,579 a global maximization, and it's nearly perfect. a global maximization, and it's nearly perfect.
437 00:17:19,603 00:17:21,451 I wondered if this was the key I wondered if this was the key
438 00:17:21,475 00:17:23,714 to the smoothness of matter in the universe. to the smoothness of matter in the universe.
439 00:17:23,738 00:17:27,631 The cosmic web of stars and galaxies could hold it together The cosmic web of stars and galaxies could hold it together
440 00:17:27,655 00:17:30,068 like the web of polymers in soap! like the web of polymers in soap!
441 00:17:30,092 00:17:31,809 This could be a whole new area of research. This could be a whole new area of research.
442 00:17:31,833 00:17:33,811 Changing majors Changing majors
443 00:17:33,835 00:17:36,031 would be a huge mistake, but if this is what would be a huge mistake, but if this is what
444 00:17:36,055 00:17:39,101 you really want, here you go. you really want, here you go.
445 00:17:41,669 00:17:43,951 Sheldon? What? Sheldon? What?
446 00:17:43,975 00:17:46,389 Here you go. Good luck with philosophy. Here you go. Good luck with philosophy.
447 00:17:46,413 00:17:49,261 I'm back on science now. I have work to do. I'm back on science now. I have work to do.
448 00:17:58,686 00:18:01,665 Captioning sponsored by CBS. Captioning sponsored by CBS.
449 00:18:04,779 00:18:08,019 And TOYOTA. And TOYOTA.
450 00:18:08,043 00:18:12,043 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org