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1 00:00:00,868 00:00:02,412 Previously on "The Path"... Previously on "The Path"...
2 00:00:02,436 00:00:04,448 - The only experience I've had is with one other - The only experience I've had is with one other
3 00:00:04,472 00:00:06,683 super-closeted guy at the church. super-closeted guy at the church.
4 00:00:06,707 00:00:08,485 - Is it Arnie Phillips? - Is it Arnie Phillips?
5 00:00:08,509 00:00:12,222 - Tonight I want to introduce the Guardian - Tonight I want to introduce the Guardian
6 00:00:12,246 00:00:16,426 who will tend this corner of the world, Felicia Pickard. who will tend this corner of the world, Felicia Pickard.
7 00:00:16,450 00:00:18,495 - You should've left him in the ground. - You should've left him in the ground.
8 00:00:18,519 00:00:21,431 - I need you to find your way back. - I need you to find your way back.
9 00:00:21,455 00:00:23,700 - You have to tell Eddie the truth about Steve. - You have to tell Eddie the truth about Steve.
10 00:00:23,724 00:00:27,537 - Vera has found some old diaries of Steve's, - Vera has found some old diaries of Steve's,
11 00:00:27,561 00:00:30,374 and she thinks you wrote "The Ladder," or part of it. and she thinks you wrote "The Ladder," or part of it.
12 00:00:30,398 00:00:32,809 - She claims Steve stole the religion from her, - She claims Steve stole the religion from her,
13 00:00:32,833 00:00:35,345 but that's not what made us cut her off. but that's not what made us cut her off.
14 00:00:35,369 00:00:37,247 It was when she hurt her child. It was when she hurt her child.
15 00:00:37,271 00:00:38,782 The poor girl is probably scarred for life. The poor girl is probably scarred for life.
16 00:00:38,806 00:00:42,286 - I don't need a secular liaison. - I don't need a secular liaison.
17 00:00:42,310 00:00:45,689 - Are you firing me? - I guess I am. - Are you firing me? - I guess I am.
18 00:00:45,713 00:00:49,093 - He loves me. The answer is to find more JPs, - He loves me. The answer is to find more JPs,
19 00:00:49,117 00:00:52,462 make them my followers, and then take them with me. make them my followers, and then take them with me.
20 00:00:55,489 00:01:02,559
21 00:01:15,876 00:01:23,316
22 00:01:33,527 00:01:37,474 - We have grown tenfold in the last eight months. - We have grown tenfold in the last eight months.
23 00:01:37,498 00:01:39,543 Expanded into other countries. Expanded into other countries.
24 00:01:39,567 00:01:41,878 Our message has spread digitally Our message has spread digitally
25 00:01:41,902 00:01:45,382 all over the world. all over the world.
26 00:01:45,406 00:01:49,353 And all that sounds great. And all that sounds great.
27 00:01:49,377 00:01:51,688 And it is! And it is!
28 00:01:51,712 00:01:54,924 It's an opportunity to do more, It's an opportunity to do more,
29 00:01:54,948 00:01:59,496 to make a bigger impact. to make a bigger impact.
30 00:01:59,520 00:02:03,767 But growth can be a distraction. But growth can be a distraction.
31 00:02:03,791 00:02:08,905 It can distract you from the growth that really matters. It can distract you from the growth that really matters.
32 00:02:08,929 00:02:12,876 The growth within. The growth within.
33 00:02:12,900 00:02:16,880 You see, that is what I'm afraid is happening You see, that is what I'm afraid is happening
34 00:02:16,904 00:02:18,915 here with us right now. here with us right now.
35 00:02:18,939 00:02:21,485 All of us. All of us.
36 00:02:21,509 00:02:27,791 So this is what I want you to share with everyone, okay? So this is what I want you to share with everyone, okay?
37 00:02:27,815 00:02:31,895 Our new decree: Our new decree:
38 00:02:31,919 00:02:34,964 Refinement. Refinement.
39 00:02:34,988 00:02:37,201 At the beginning of next week, At the beginning of next week,
40 00:02:37,225 00:02:40,504 each and every one of us, all of us, each and every one of us, all of us,
41 00:02:40,528 00:02:45,942 are going to extract something harmful from our lives, are going to extract something harmful from our lives,
42 00:02:45,966 00:02:49,446 and lay it before the light. and lay it before the light.
43 00:02:49,470 00:02:52,816 I'm not talking about giving up gin in favor of vodka. I'm not talking about giving up gin in favor of vodka.
44 00:02:52,840 00:02:56,453 I'm asking you to dig deep. I'm asking you to dig deep.
45 00:02:56,477 00:02:59,756 What is in your life that just doesn't need to be? What is in your life that just doesn't need to be?
46 00:02:59,780 00:03:01,925 That should not be? That should not be?
47 00:03:01,949 00:03:06,796 It could be a thing, a habit, a relationship. It could be a thing, a habit, a relationship.
48 00:03:06,820 00:03:09,866 Look, you are all here because you are the ones Look, you are all here because you are the ones
49 00:03:09,890 00:03:15,872 that everyone here looks up to, okay? that everyone here looks up to, okay?
50 00:03:15,896 00:03:19,443 So I need you to get the word out. So I need you to get the word out.
51 00:03:19,467 00:03:22,946 Lead by example. Lead by example.
52 00:03:22,970 00:03:27,684 Okay? Dig deep. Okay? Dig deep.
53 00:03:27,708 00:03:31,721 Because I am telling you if we do this, Because I am telling you if we do this,
54 00:03:31,745 00:03:35,459 The Light will shine so bright The Light will shine so bright
55 00:03:35,483 00:03:39,829 that not a soul can deny it. that not a soul can deny it.
56 00:03:39,853 00:03:43,667 And all of those who are lost And all of those who are lost
57 00:03:43,691 00:03:48,472 will find their way back home. will find their way back home.
58 00:03:48,496 00:03:51,040 Thank you all. Thank you all.
59 00:03:54,067 00:04:01,237
60 00:04:04,312 00:04:06,022 - You definitely made your point. - You definitely made your point.
61 00:04:06,046 00:04:07,957 - In a good way, or... - No, in the best way possible. - In a good way, or... - No, in the best way possible.
62 00:04:07,981 00:04:09,926 They weren't just listening to you, they heard you. They weren't just listening to you, they heard you.
63 00:04:09,950 00:04:13,730 - Yeah, well, you know, I'm convinced that we need this. - Yeah, well, you know, I'm convinced that we need this.
64 00:04:13,754 00:04:14,798 - Well, message received. - Well, message received.
65 00:04:14,822 00:04:16,733 Seriously. Seriously.
66 00:04:16,757 00:04:21,305 Bold action will recalibrate, unify our membership. Bold action will recalibrate, unify our membership.
67 00:04:21,329 00:04:23,873 - It felt good, it feels right. - It felt good, it feels right.
68 00:04:23,897 00:04:25,809 They'll get the message out to the membership. They'll get the message out to the membership.
69 00:04:25,833 00:04:30,714 - Yeah, they will. We will. - Yeah, they will. We will.
70 00:04:30,738 00:04:33,783 I couldn't help notice, um... I couldn't help notice, um...
71 00:04:33,807 00:04:36,637 Sarah wasn't... wasn't there. Sarah wasn't... wasn't there.
72 00:04:38,011 00:04:42,826 - Yeah, um... Sarah. - Yeah, um... Sarah.
73 00:04:42,850 00:04:45,829 She is on her own personal journey right now. She is on her own personal journey right now.
74 00:04:45,853 00:04:49,766 I don't know why or where, or if it's even personal, but... I don't know why or where, or if it's even personal, but...
75 00:04:49,790 00:04:51,901 You know, I just don't have time to think about it. You know, I just don't have time to think about it.
76 00:04:51,925 00:04:54,738 You know? About her. You know? About her.
77 00:04:54,762 00:04:56,873 Look she... Look she...
78 00:04:56,897 00:04:59,543 "The Yellow Birch Inn," this is all she left me "The Yellow Birch Inn," this is all she left me
79 00:04:59,567 00:05:03,647 in case of emergency with the kids. in case of emergency with the kids.
80 00:05:08,942 00:05:11,788 - Look... if there's anything you need... - Look... if there's anything you need...
81 00:05:11,812 00:05:14,023 - It'll work itself out one way or another, - It'll work itself out one way or another,
82 00:05:14,047 00:05:18,061 but thank you though. but thank you though.
83 00:05:18,085 00:05:19,963 Hey, what are you guys doing tonight? Hey, what are you guys doing tonight?
84 00:05:19,987 00:05:22,366 If you're free, you want to come to my house, If you're free, you want to come to my house,
85 00:05:22,390 00:05:23,733 have a family dinner with us? have a family dinner with us?
86 00:05:23,757 00:05:25,669 - Yeah. Yeah, that'd be great. - Yeah. Yeah, that'd be great.
87 00:05:25,693 00:05:28,137 - Great. 7:00? - Yeah. - Great. 7:00? - Yeah.
88 00:05:28,161 00:05:29,831 - All right. - All right.
89 00:05:33,601 00:05:35,379 Hey. Hey.
90 00:05:35,403 00:05:36,946 - I'll be out of here in just a moment. - I'll be out of here in just a moment.
91 00:05:36,970 00:05:39,383 Just had a few things of mine to collect. Just had a few things of mine to collect.
92 00:05:39,407 00:05:44,688 - Look, I'm not trying to rush you, I just... - Look, I'm not trying to rush you, I just...
93 00:05:44,712 00:05:48,157 I just never got a chance to apologize. I just never got a chance to apologize.
94 00:05:48,181 00:05:52,696 And I wish things could've gone down differently. And I wish things could've gone down differently.
95 00:05:52,720 00:05:54,398 - Don't be silly, it's, um... - Don't be silly, it's, um...
96 00:05:54,422 00:05:56,065 It's just the business. It's just the business.
97 00:05:56,089 00:05:57,767 It's not meant to be nice. It's not meant to be nice.
98 00:05:57,791 00:06:00,404 - You are incredible at what you do. - You are incredible at what you do.
99 00:06:00,428 00:06:02,639 - I really don't need a bunch of smoke blown... - I really don't need a bunch of smoke blown...
100 00:06:02,663 00:06:04,841 - I mean... I mean this. - I mean... I mean this.
101 00:06:04,865 00:06:06,776 You are a visionary. You are a visionary.
102 00:06:06,800 00:06:08,712 You've helped us grow. You've helped us grow.
103 00:06:08,736 00:06:12,015 You took us to that next level, and, Vera, You took us to that next level, and, Vera,
104 00:06:12,039 00:06:15,752 I'm incredibly grateful for that. I'm incredibly grateful for that.
105 00:06:15,776 00:06:18,688 I've just come to realize that your outlook, I've just come to realize that your outlook,
106 00:06:18,712 00:06:23,827 your entire secular approach is just not a match for us, your entire secular approach is just not a match for us,
107 00:06:23,851 00:06:26,195 for Meyerism. for Meyerism.
108 00:06:26,219 00:06:28,164 - Yeah, I um... - Yeah, I um...
109 00:06:28,188 00:06:32,669 I think you're right about that. I think you're right about that.
110 00:06:32,693 00:06:34,763 More than you know. More than you know.
111 00:06:42,736 00:06:44,147 Oh my God, you have to see this. Oh my God, you have to see this.
112 00:06:44,171 00:06:45,715 This is amazing. This is amazing.
113 00:06:45,739 00:06:47,451 - If it's another video, I don't... - If it's another video, I don't...
114 00:06:47,475 00:06:49,185 No, it's an e-mail from JP, No, it's an e-mail from JP,
115 00:06:49,209 00:06:52,021 and he says that he owes us a great debt of gratitude and he says that he owes us a great debt of gratitude
116 00:06:52,045 00:06:54,875 for your wisdom and insight. for your wisdom and insight.
117 00:06:56,717 00:06:58,194 - That's very kind of him. - That's very kind of him.
118 00:06:58,218 00:06:59,996 - Yeah, and he says that we should be receiving soon - Yeah, and he says that we should be receiving soon
119 00:07:00,020 00:07:01,465 a token of his esteem. a token of his esteem.
120 00:07:01,489 00:07:03,467 What do you think it is? What do you think it is?
121 00:07:03,491 00:07:05,935 - Whatever it is, we need to be discreet about it. - Whatever it is, we need to be discreet about it.
122 00:07:05,959 00:07:08,071 Eddie's showing me a lot of trust these days, Eddie's showing me a lot of trust these days,
123 00:07:08,095 00:07:10,974 and cultivating my own patrons could threaten that... and cultivating my own patrons could threaten that...
124 00:07:10,998 00:07:14,210 - I don't know about Eddie's trust. - I don't know about Eddie's trust.
125 00:07:14,234 00:07:16,179 - He invited us to this dinner. - He invited us to this dinner.
126 00:07:16,203 00:07:18,982 It's symbolic, I know... - Yeah, dinner at the Lane's. It's symbolic, I know... - Yeah, dinner at the Lane's.
127 00:07:19,006 00:07:21,785 We've finally arrived. We've finally arrived.
128 00:07:21,809 00:07:23,953 Maybe they're just looking to fill some chairs. Maybe they're just looking to fill some chairs.
129 00:07:23,977 00:07:26,122 Vera's gone. Sarah wasn't around today. Vera's gone. Sarah wasn't around today.
130 00:07:26,146 00:07:28,216 Did you notice that? Did you notice that?
131 00:07:31,885 00:07:34,030 "Yellow Birch Inn." - Uh-huh. "Yellow Birch Inn." - Uh-huh.
132 00:07:34,054 00:07:36,800 It's where Sarah is with, well... It's where Sarah is with, well...
133 00:07:36,824 00:07:38,935 Whoever she is with. Whoever she is with.
134 00:07:38,959 00:07:40,937 He pretended it didn't bother him, but... He pretended it didn't bother him, but...
135 00:07:42,830 00:07:45,208 - "A bucolic bed and breakfast in the Amish country - "A bucolic bed and breakfast in the Amish country
136 00:07:45,232 00:07:47,076 "well-regarded by bird lovers "well-regarded by bird lovers
137 00:07:47,100 00:07:50,680 and those looking for a romantic escape." and those looking for a romantic escape."
138 00:07:50,704 00:07:53,774 - Uh-huh. - Uh-huh.
139 00:07:55,242 00:07:57,086 So this guy that we're driving So this guy that we're driving
140 00:07:57,110 00:07:59,222 - to Pennsylvania to find now... - John Kordjak. - to Pennsylvania to find now... - John Kordjak.
141 00:07:59,246 00:08:01,791 Yeah, him. Yeah, him.
142 00:08:01,815 00:08:03,827 You saw his name in one of Lilith's journals? That's all? You saw his name in one of Lilith's journals? That's all?
143 00:08:03,851 00:08:06,162 - I know how it sounds. - Oh, I don't think you do. - I know how it sounds. - Oh, I don't think you do.
144 00:08:06,186 00:08:07,897 - You think I'm on a wild goose chase. - You think I'm on a wild goose chase.
145 00:08:07,921 00:08:09,966 - No, I'm not. I don't. I'm with you. - No, I'm not. I don't. I'm with you.
146 00:08:09,990 00:08:11,735 I just need a little guidance, I just need a little guidance,
147 00:08:11,759 00:08:15,271 like a GPS to the inside of your brain. like a GPS to the inside of your brain.
148 00:08:15,295 00:08:17,807 - I saw his name on the diaries - I saw his name on the diaries
149 00:08:17,831 00:08:19,709 that Steve and Lilith were working on together. that Steve and Lilith were working on together.
150 00:08:19,733 00:08:23,847 And it just spoke to me, so... - The name? It spoke? And it just spoke to me, so... - The name? It spoke?
151 00:08:23,871 00:08:26,082 - See, now it doesn't sound like you're with me. - See, now it doesn't sound like you're with me.
152 00:08:26,106 00:08:28,117 - I am. I am, I swear. - I am. I am, I swear.
153 00:08:28,141 00:08:31,020 - It resonated, and somehow I feel like he's got the answers - It resonated, and somehow I feel like he's got the answers
154 00:08:31,044 00:08:33,256 that I'm looking for, so I looked him up. that I'm looking for, so I looked him up.
155 00:08:33,280 00:08:34,958 And he works at a hospital nearby, so... And he works at a hospital nearby, so...
156 00:08:34,982 00:08:36,259 - Oh. - Oh.
157 00:08:36,283 00:08:38,094 - I'll never be right. - I'll never be right.
158 00:08:38,118 00:08:42,832 - What? I'm breathing. I needed to breathe. - What? I'm breathing. I needed to breathe.
159 00:08:42,856 00:08:44,067 I'm here, aren't I? I'm here, aren't I?
160 00:08:44,091 00:08:45,802 Can I get some credit for that? Can I get some credit for that?
161 00:08:45,826 00:08:47,003 - Yes, I'm glad you're here. Thank you. - Yes, I'm glad you're here. Thank you.
162 00:08:47,027 00:08:48,271 - I'm really glad you asked me. - I'm really glad you asked me.
163 00:08:48,295 00:08:50,974 I wasn't sure I'd hear from you. I wasn't sure I'd hear from you.
164 00:08:50,998 00:08:52,275 I mean a trip to France with your ex? I mean a trip to France with your ex?
165 00:08:52,299 00:08:54,043 That's not the greatest sign. That's not the greatest sign.
166 00:08:54,067 00:08:58,047 - That was work, all right? That's all. - That was work, all right? That's all.
167 00:08:58,071 00:09:01,017 - Thank you. - Thank you.
168 00:09:01,041 00:09:03,753 - Come back. - Come back.
169 00:09:03,777 00:09:06,847 Push forward. Push forward.
170 00:09:09,149 00:09:12,829 Come back, breathing in. Come back, breathing in.
171 00:09:12,853 00:09:16,900 Push forward. Push forward.
172 00:09:16,924 00:09:21,170 Now turn to center, keeping your knees bent. Now turn to center, keeping your knees bent.
173 00:09:21,194 00:09:24,264 Turn all the way. Turn all the way.
174 00:09:29,402 00:09:33,817 Turn, turn, turn. - There's John. Turn, turn, turn. - There's John.
175 00:09:33,841 00:09:36,352 - And push forward. - And push forward.
176 00:09:39,379 00:09:46,930
177 00:09:46,954 00:09:49,866 Come back. Come back.
178 00:09:49,890 00:09:52,290 Push forward. Push forward.
179 00:09:57,931 00:09:59,342 - How did you find me? - How did you find me?
180 00:09:59,366 00:10:01,344 - Well, you didn't make it that difficult. - Well, you didn't make it that difficult.
181 00:10:01,368 00:10:03,079 You're living under your name you had You're living under your name you had
182 00:10:03,103 00:10:06,950 before you joined the Movement. before you joined the Movement.
183 00:10:06,974 00:10:09,986 - I wasn't trying to hide, - I wasn't trying to hide,
184 00:10:10,010 00:10:13,089 just return to myself. just return to myself.
185 00:10:13,113 00:10:16,323 The individual I lost when I joined the many. The individual I lost when I joined the many.
186 00:10:18,385 00:10:21,665 - There's someone I want to learn more about. - There's someone I want to learn more about.
187 00:10:21,689 00:10:23,933 Someone from the early days of the Movement. Someone from the early days of the Movement.
188 00:10:23,957 00:10:26,002 Her name is Lilith. Her name is Lilith.
189 00:10:26,026 00:10:30,206 A patient of Steve's. You know her. A patient of Steve's. You know her.
190 00:10:30,230 00:10:31,975 Anything that you can tell me about her Anything that you can tell me about her
191 00:10:31,999 00:10:35,069 would be very helpful. would be very helpful.
192 00:10:38,405 00:10:40,684 - These kids... - These kids...
193 00:10:40,708 00:10:44,220 They're the poor people of our big, prosperous country. They're the poor people of our big, prosperous country.
194 00:10:44,244 00:10:47,423 We ship them off to fight our wars, and they end up here. We ship them off to fight our wars, and they end up here.
195 00:10:47,447 00:10:49,158 Broken. Broken.
196 00:10:49,182 00:10:51,327 Forgotten. Forgotten.
197 00:10:51,351 00:10:54,397 I came here to be of service to them. I came here to be of service to them.
198 00:10:54,421 00:10:56,399 And every day that I'm here, caring for them, And every day that I'm here, caring for them,
199 00:10:56,423 00:11:01,404 being with them, I know I'm doing good. being with them, I know I'm doing good.
200 00:11:01,428 00:11:04,107 Sarah, so much of my life was wasted Sarah, so much of my life was wasted
201 00:11:04,131 00:11:07,143 worshipping someone who turned out to be nothing but a man worshipping someone who turned out to be nothing but a man
202 00:11:07,167 00:11:09,412 as mortal and as flawed as any of us. as mortal and as flawed as any of us.
203 00:11:09,436 00:11:11,414 - You really think it was all a waste? - You really think it was all a waste?
204 00:11:11,438 00:11:14,017 - Don't ask me to go back to those days, Sarah. - Don't ask me to go back to those days, Sarah.
205 00:11:14,041 00:11:16,119 It's too painful! It's too painful!
206 00:11:16,143 00:11:17,453 I'm not just here trying to help them, I'm not just here trying to help them,
207 00:11:17,477 00:11:19,222 I'm trying to heal myself. I'm trying to heal myself.
208 00:11:19,246 00:11:23,159 I don't want to open up any old wounds. I don't want to open up any old wounds.
209 00:11:23,183 00:11:27,296 I'm sorry. I can't help you. I'm sorry. I can't help you.
210 00:11:27,320 00:11:30,390 - I don't know if you heard, but my father passed. - I don't know if you heard, but my father passed.
211 00:11:36,229 00:11:39,175 - I am so sorry to hear that. - I am so sorry to hear that.
212 00:11:39,199 00:11:42,178 Hank was one of the good ones. Hank was one of the good ones.
213 00:11:45,205 00:11:52,245
214 00:11:54,147 00:11:57,217 May his memory be for a blessing. May his memory be for a blessing.
215 00:12:01,521 00:12:05,501 And give my regards to your mom. And give my regards to your mom.
216 00:12:05,525 00:12:08,271 - I'm staying nearby. - I'm staying nearby.
217 00:12:08,295 00:12:10,725 The Yellow Birch Inn, if you change your mind. The Yellow Birch Inn, if you change your mind.
218 00:12:27,080 00:12:28,457 - Remy? - Remy?
219 00:12:28,481 00:12:31,094 Hi. Hi.
220 00:12:31,118 00:12:32,495 Sorry, it's just, um... Sorry, it's just, um...
221 00:12:32,519 00:12:34,463 Didn't know where else to... Didn't know where else to...
222 00:12:34,487 00:12:36,499 I mean, four years of marriage, you never once missed I mean, four years of marriage, you never once missed
223 00:12:36,523 00:12:39,568 Vinyasa Flow with Bianca. Vinyasa Flow with Bianca.
224 00:12:39,592 00:12:42,005 - What can I do for you, Vera? - What can I do for you, Vera?
225 00:12:42,029 00:12:43,539 - It's about my mother. - It's about my mother.
226 00:12:43,563 00:12:47,043 - Of course it is. - Of course it is.
227 00:12:47,067 00:12:49,578 You can buy me a juice. You can buy me a juice.
228 00:12:49,602 00:12:52,281 She burned you? She burned you?
229 00:12:52,305 00:12:54,117 - The scar on my back. - The scar on my back.
230 00:12:54,141 00:12:56,085 - You said you got that from a car accident - You said you got that from a car accident
231 00:12:56,109 00:12:57,186 before you could remember. before you could remember.
232 00:12:57,210 00:12:59,188 - That's what she told me. - That's what she told me.
233 00:12:59,212 00:13:02,258 I know you always thought we had an unhealthy relationship. I know you always thought we had an unhealthy relationship.
234 00:13:04,317 00:13:07,496 - But there's a big difference between unhealthy - But there's a big difference between unhealthy
235 00:13:07,520 00:13:11,260 and my mother being genuinely... - Crazy. and my mother being genuinely... - Crazy.
236 00:13:12,592 00:13:15,338 How long has it been since you talked to her? How long has it been since you talked to her?
237 00:13:15,362 00:13:18,041 - It's not about how long. - It's not about how long.
238 00:13:18,065 00:13:22,478 - So it's only been what? A week? A few days? - So it's only been what? A week? A few days?
239 00:13:22,502 00:13:24,413 This is what you do, Vera. This is what you do, Vera.
240 00:13:24,437 00:13:26,515 This is why we never really had a marriage. This is why we never really had a marriage.
241 00:13:26,539 00:13:29,118 You vow to cut her out of your life, You vow to cut her out of your life,
242 00:13:29,142 00:13:30,453 and that lasts maybe a month before... and that lasts maybe a month before...
243 00:13:30,477 00:13:32,321 - Remy. - Remy.
244 00:13:32,345 00:13:35,258 - I can't be a part of the codependent addiction - I can't be a part of the codependent addiction
245 00:13:35,282 00:13:37,160 you two have to each other. you two have to each other.
246 00:13:37,184 00:13:42,065 It took me a long time to get over you. It took me a long time to get over you.
247 00:13:42,089 00:13:45,159 Yeah, I'm seeing someone. Yeah, I'm seeing someone.
248 00:13:48,495 00:13:50,573 - That's great. - It is. She's great. - That's great. - It is. She's great.
249 00:13:50,597 00:13:54,310 We're not living together or anything, but it's great. We're not living together or anything, but it's great.
250 00:13:54,334 00:13:56,145 You know, it's easy. You know, it's easy.
251 00:13:56,169 00:13:57,480 - So what? - So what?
252 00:13:57,504 00:14:01,350 It's an Internet date or something? It's an Internet date or something?
253 00:14:01,374 00:14:03,386 - That doesn't make it any less real. - That doesn't make it any less real.
254 00:14:03,410 00:14:05,388 You have to meet somehow. You have to meet somehow.
255 00:14:05,412 00:14:07,256 - That's... Oh, okay. Yes, that's true. - That's... Oh, okay. Yes, that's true.
256 00:14:07,280 00:14:10,159 That's true, the city has so many people, That's true, the city has so many people,
257 00:14:10,183 00:14:12,428 you know, to find someone, you know, to find someone,
258 00:14:12,452 00:14:16,332 anyone you can genuinely connect with, that's... anyone you can genuinely connect with, that's...
259 00:14:16,356 00:14:19,168 That feels like a miracle. That feels like a miracle.
260 00:14:19,192 00:14:22,671 - So what about you? Do you have someone? - So what about you? Do you have someone?
261 00:14:22,695 00:14:27,576 - I thought maybe, but apparently he doesn't feel - I thought maybe, but apparently he doesn't feel
262 00:14:27,600 00:14:30,146 the same way about me. the same way about me.
263 00:14:30,170 00:14:31,580 - Well, he sounds like an idiot. - Well, he sounds like an idiot.
264 00:14:37,310 00:14:40,456 And blessings to our beloved Hank, And blessings to our beloved Hank,
265 00:14:40,480 00:14:43,927 whom death has temporarily separated from us. whom death has temporarily separated from us.
266 00:14:43,951 00:14:49,632 And for Sarah, as she embarks on a personal journey. And for Sarah, as she embarks on a personal journey.
267 00:14:49,656 00:14:51,300 Please illuminate her path. Please illuminate her path.
268 00:14:51,324 00:14:54,337 - We pray before and after meals now? - We pray before and after meals now?
269 00:14:54,361 00:14:56,539 - We pray whenever we need to pray. - We pray whenever we need to pray.
270 00:14:56,563 00:14:58,641 - I'll wrap it up. - I'll wrap it up.
271 00:14:58,665 00:15:01,377 - No, go ahead, Gabby. - No, she's right. - No, go ahead, Gabby. - No, she's right.
272 00:15:01,401 00:15:05,114 The last thing Hank would want is for us to postpone pie time. The last thing Hank would want is for us to postpone pie time.
273 00:15:06,673 00:15:08,551 - I'm actually gonna head back into the city tonight. - I'm actually gonna head back into the city tonight.
274 00:15:08,575 00:15:10,653 Really? Already? Really? Already?
275 00:15:10,677 00:15:13,156 - Yeah, um... - Yeah, um...
276 00:15:13,180 00:15:15,724 The people at the center are having trouble figuring out The people at the center are having trouble figuring out
277 00:15:15,748 00:15:17,526 what they're going to sacrifice for Refinement, what they're going to sacrifice for Refinement,
278 00:15:17,550 00:15:21,597 so I said I'd help them out. so I said I'd help them out.
279 00:15:21,621 00:15:23,532 - That's very kind of you. - That's very kind of you.
280 00:15:23,556 00:15:25,401 But don't you think it's best But don't you think it's best
281 00:15:25,425 00:15:27,603 if they come to those decisions on their own? if they come to those decisions on their own?
282 00:15:29,629 00:15:34,343 Yeah, I know, but some of them haven't done this before. Yeah, I know, but some of them haven't done this before.
283 00:15:34,367 00:15:37,180 So I said I'd guide them a bit. So I said I'd guide them a bit.
284 00:15:37,204 00:15:38,647 - I did too. - What? - I did too. - What?
285 00:15:38,671 00:15:40,283 - I said I'd help some people out too. - I said I'd help some people out too.
286 00:15:40,307 00:15:42,451 - Well, you kids are so giving. - Well, you kids are so giving.
287 00:15:42,475 00:15:44,253 - It's true. - It's true.
288 00:15:44,277 00:15:47,756 - Okay, well, drive safe. - Okay, well, drive safe.
289 00:15:47,780 00:15:49,492 Have a good talk. Have a good talk.
290 00:15:49,516 00:15:50,693 - Sure. - Pie time! - Sure. - Pie time!
291 00:15:50,717 00:15:52,428 - Yeah! - Yeah!
292 00:15:52,452 00:15:54,998 - Pie is the one thing you cannot make me - Pie is the one thing you cannot make me
293 00:15:55,022 00:15:57,366 give up for Refinement, Eddie, okay? give up for Refinement, Eddie, okay?
294 00:15:57,390 00:15:58,767 - How often are you gonna come up - How often are you gonna come up
295 00:15:58,791 00:16:01,270 with these new decrees, by the way? with these new decrees, by the way?
296 00:16:01,294 00:16:03,306 Oh, Russel, not now. I'm tired. Oh, Russel, not now. I'm tired.
297 00:16:03,330 00:16:05,708 - Every month? Every week? - Every month? Every week?
298 00:16:05,732 00:16:07,376 - Russel. - Russel.
299 00:16:07,400 00:16:09,412 - The decrees help us. - It's true. - The decrees help us. - It's true.
300 00:16:09,436 00:16:14,317 The Movement needed a reset, and this is how we're doing it. The Movement needed a reset, and this is how we're doing it.
301 00:16:14,341 00:16:16,219 - And Sarah? - And Sarah?
302 00:16:16,243 00:16:18,254 Is this how she's doing that? How she's resetting? Is this how she's doing that? How she's resetting?
303 00:16:18,278 00:16:21,724 Running around like she doesn't have a daughter to raise? Running around like she doesn't have a daughter to raise?
304 00:16:21,748 00:16:24,327 I don't know what you've heard, but the Novices are talking. I don't know what you've heard, but the Novices are talking.
305 00:16:24,351 00:16:27,391 The rumor is she disagrees with the way you're running things. The rumor is she disagrees with the way you're running things.
306 00:16:30,423 00:16:32,668 - You know what? - You know what?
307 00:16:32,692 00:16:36,339 Why don't you focus on your own work, Russel? Why don't you focus on your own work, Russel?
308 00:16:36,363 00:16:40,276 As far as I can tell, you have plenty of it. As far as I can tell, you have plenty of it.
309 00:16:42,502 00:16:44,280
310 00:16:44,304 00:16:46,582 - Eddie, would you like some pie? - Eddie, would you like some pie?
311 00:16:46,606 00:16:49,652 I know Cal does. I know Cal does.
312 00:16:49,676 00:16:53,289 - That would be great, Mary. Thank you. - That would be great, Mary. Thank you.
313 00:16:53,313 00:16:54,723 - ♪ No, it's not your imagination ♪ - ♪ No, it's not your imagination ♪
314 00:16:54,747 00:16:56,792 ♪ All this ain't no hallucination ♪ ♪ All this ain't no hallucination ♪
315 00:16:56,816 00:16:58,527 ♪ Not a dream or an illusion, see ♪ ♪ Not a dream or an illusion, see ♪
316 00:16:58,551 00:17:00,496 ♪ Like Buff Monster or Alex Pardee ♪ ♪ Like Buff Monster or Alex Pardee ♪
317 00:17:00,520 00:17:02,431 ♪ I'm the vision that you want to be ♪ ♪ I'm the vision that you want to be ♪
318 00:17:02,455 00:17:04,600 ♪ That's why all you all bitches so into me ♪ ♪ That's why all you all bitches so into me ♪
319 00:17:04,624 00:17:06,502 ♪ Hands up for your favorite freak ♪ ♪ Hands up for your favorite freak ♪
320 00:17:06,526 00:17:08,371 - Hey, guys. Sorry I'm late. - Hey, guys. Sorry I'm late.
321 00:17:08,395 00:17:10,373 My dad was like all over me tonight. My dad was like all over me tonight.
322 00:17:10,397 00:17:12,741 I feel like he can, like, sense something, you know? I feel like he can, like, sense something, you know?
323 00:17:12,765 00:17:14,577 I had to make up this crazy story I had to make up this crazy story
324 00:17:14,601 00:17:16,612 about helping some girl out with her Bible study. about helping some girl out with her Bible study.
325 00:17:16,636 00:17:19,315 - Well, hopefully you're a better liar than Hawk. - Well, hopefully you're a better liar than Hawk.
326 00:17:19,339 00:17:21,284 - I was not lying. - Oh, please. - I was not lying. - Oh, please.
327 00:17:21,308 00:17:22,785 Even Grandma saw right through you. Even Grandma saw right through you.
328 00:17:22,809 00:17:24,853 Like a wet T-shirt. Like a wet T-shirt.
329 00:17:24,877 00:17:26,622 - That's a terrible reference. - That's a terrible reference.
330 00:17:26,646 00:17:29,825 I was just creatively reinterpreting I was just creatively reinterpreting
331 00:17:29,849 00:17:31,660 the whole Refinement thing. the whole Refinement thing.
332 00:17:31,684 00:17:33,396 If my mom can take a personal journey... If my mom can take a personal journey...
333 00:17:33,420 00:17:35,564 - Hey, you don't have to convince me, okay? - Hey, you don't have to convince me, okay?
334 00:17:35,588 00:17:38,301 This is heaven! - Thanks, guys... This is heaven! - Thanks, guys...
335 00:17:38,325 00:17:41,304 - I found it, and I never want to leave. - I found it, and I never want to leave.
336 00:17:41,328 00:17:43,539 But I do have to pee. But I do have to pee.
337 00:17:43,563 00:17:45,341 - Whoa, slow down, girl! - Whoa, slow down, girl!
338 00:17:45,365 00:17:47,676 We don't do lines outside the bathrooms here. We don't do lines outside the bathrooms here.
339 00:17:47,700 00:17:50,679 We do lines inside the bathrooms. We do lines inside the bathrooms.
340 00:17:50,703 00:17:52,715 Right? Right?
341 00:17:52,739 00:17:54,450 - You into this? - You into this?
342 00:17:54,474 00:17:57,753 - I'm open. - I'm open.
343 00:17:57,777 00:17:59,555 It's an experience. It's an experience.
344 00:17:59,579 00:18:01,724 - Yeah, that it is. - Yeah, that it is.
345 00:18:01,748 00:18:03,892 I'm just happy we don't have to be up closer, though. I'm just happy we don't have to be up closer, though.
346 00:18:03,916 00:18:06,795 - And what is your name, sir? - And what is your name, sir?
347 00:18:06,819 00:18:08,631 Hmm? Hmm?
348 00:18:08,655 00:18:12,568 Won't tell me? Okay. Won't tell me? Okay.
349 00:18:12,592 00:18:15,804 You know, you are just my type! You know, you are just my type!
350 00:18:15,828 00:18:17,373 Closeted! Closeted!
351 00:18:19,499 00:18:22,478 - Is that... - Yeah, yeah, that's Arnie. - Is that... - Yeah, yeah, that's Arnie.
352 00:18:22,502 00:18:24,547 Wait, here's the move. We just... Wait, here's the move. We just...
353 00:18:24,571 00:18:25,781 - Yeah, what does that mean? - Yeah, what does that mean?
354 00:18:25,805 00:18:27,750 - You know what it means, just... - You know what it means, just...
355 00:18:27,774 00:18:29,885 play it cool. play it cool.
356 00:18:29,909 00:18:31,654 - Aww. - Aww.
357 00:18:31,678 00:18:33,556 - Hello there, young men! - Hello there, young men!
358 00:18:33,580 00:18:36,859 Enjoying a little cultural scenery? Enjoying a little cultural scenery?
359 00:18:36,883 00:18:39,562 - You know, when you're in the city, - You know, when you're in the city,
360 00:18:39,586 00:18:42,898 why not take in the more colorful sights? why not take in the more colorful sights?
361 00:18:42,922 00:18:45,734 - Well, pray for them. - Yeah, don't pray for me. - Well, pray for them. - Yeah, don't pray for me.
362 00:18:45,758 00:18:47,503 - Excuse me? - Excuse me?
363 00:18:47,527 00:18:48,904 - We're here for the same reason you are. - We're here for the same reason you are.
364 00:18:48,928 00:18:53,809 It's just that we're together. It's just that we're together.
365 00:18:53,833 00:18:55,744 - I'm kidding. Believe me. - I'm kidding. Believe me.
366 00:18:59,772 00:19:04,653 - Um... I'm... so sorry. - Um... I'm... so sorry.
367 00:19:04,677 00:19:06,889 I just wasn't gonna stand here I just wasn't gonna stand here
368 00:19:06,913 00:19:09,625 and pretend like I didn't know how he treated you. and pretend like I didn't know how he treated you.
369 00:19:09,649 00:19:14,697 - No, I appreciated it, like a lot. - No, I appreciated it, like a lot.
370 00:19:14,721 00:19:17,791 It's very heroic of you. It's very heroic of you.
371 00:19:22,962 00:19:25,508 - Russel is a ticking bomb. - Russel is a ticking bomb.
372 00:19:25,532 00:19:26,875 - It's hard to blame him. - It's hard to blame him.
373 00:19:26,899 00:19:29,878 Russel's been passed over, cheated on. Russel's been passed over, cheated on.
374 00:19:29,902 00:19:31,914 - Well, now I know why Eddie invited us. - Well, now I know why Eddie invited us.
375 00:19:31,938 00:19:33,982 He didn't want to be alone with all that dysfunction. He didn't want to be alone with all that dysfunction.
376 00:19:34,006 00:19:35,684 - I choose to think he's interested - I choose to think he's interested
377 00:19:35,708 00:19:37,820 in getting closer to us as a family. in getting closer to us as a family.
378 00:19:37,844 00:19:40,914 - Excuse me, Mr. Roberts? - Excuse me, Mr. Roberts?
379 00:19:44,917 00:19:48,931 - "A token of my esteem. Yours in Light, Jean-Paul." - "A token of my esteem. Yours in Light, Jean-Paul."
380 00:19:48,955 00:19:50,833 What am I signing for? - Oh. What am I signing for? - Oh.
381 00:19:53,860 00:20:00,930
382 00:20:05,572 00:20:08,642 Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
383 00:20:21,754 00:20:23,699 - We deserve this, don't you think? - We deserve this, don't you think?
384 00:20:23,723 00:20:25,934 - I do. - I do.
385 00:20:25,958 00:20:29,472 I'm not sure that anyone else would see it in the same way. I'm not sure that anyone else would see it in the same way.
386 00:20:29,496 00:20:31,440 - I mean, it's payment. - I know. - I mean, it's payment. - I know.
387 00:20:31,464 00:20:32,841 I'm not sure that anyone else would see it in the same... I'm not sure that anyone else would see it in the same...
388 00:20:32,865 00:20:34,610 - And by anyone else, you mean Eddie. - And by anyone else, you mean Eddie.
389 00:20:34,634 00:20:38,614 - Yeah, especially during this time of Refinement. - Yeah, especially during this time of Refinement.
390 00:20:38,638 00:20:41,984 It's not exactly on message. It's not exactly on message.
391 00:20:42,008 00:20:43,852 - Eddie could've won over JP, - Eddie could've won over JP,
392 00:20:43,876 00:20:46,722 but he was distracted by his issues with Sarah. but he was distracted by his issues with Sarah.
393 00:20:46,746 00:20:48,591 You had the foresight to see what he needed, You had the foresight to see what he needed,
394 00:20:48,615 00:20:51,294 and you were rewarded for it. and you were rewarded for it.
395 00:20:51,318 00:20:53,696 Our plan is working, okay? We're building our clients, Our plan is working, okay? We're building our clients,
396 00:20:53,720 00:20:56,031 making connections, and this car is a sign. making connections, and this car is a sign.
397 00:20:56,055 00:20:57,666 - Well, I just wish he'd send a sign - Well, I just wish he'd send a sign
398 00:20:57,690 00:20:59,902 that was a little less visible. that was a little less visible.
399 00:20:59,926 00:21:01,537 Eddie would punish us. Eddie would punish us.
400 00:21:01,561 00:21:03,306 - Oh, not if he doesn't find out. - Oh, not if he doesn't find out.
401 00:21:03,330 00:21:05,808 I mean, there must be a garage somewhere out of the way. I mean, there must be a garage somewhere out of the way.
402 00:21:05,832 00:21:07,743 We can store it. We can store it.
403 00:21:07,767 00:21:09,778 This is something for us, okay? This is something for us, okay?
404 00:21:09,802 00:21:13,582 Think about how much we do for him. Think about how much we do for him.
405 00:21:13,606 00:21:15,851 In fact, let's find out if Sarah is really In fact, let's find out if Sarah is really
406 00:21:15,875 00:21:17,953 having a personal journey for him. having a personal journey for him.
407 00:21:23,115 00:21:24,760 - Good afternoon, Yellow Birch Inn. - Good afternoon, Yellow Birch Inn.
408 00:21:24,784 00:21:27,663 This is Liz. How can I help you today? This is Liz. How can I help you today?
409 00:21:27,687 00:21:30,599 - Hi, Liz. My name is Nicole, and I was wondering - Hi, Liz. My name is Nicole, and I was wondering
410 00:21:30,623 00:21:32,668 if you could help me on a secret mission. if you could help me on a secret mission.
411 00:21:32,692 00:21:34,837 My sister Sarah Lane is staying with you at the Inn, I believe. My sister Sarah Lane is staying with you at the Inn, I believe.
412 00:21:34,861 00:21:36,705 - Oh, I'm really not supposed to disclose - Oh, I'm really not supposed to disclose
413 00:21:36,729 00:21:38,341 the names of our guests. the names of our guests.
414 00:21:38,365 00:21:39,908 - Yeah, it's just that her and her fiancé, - Yeah, it's just that her and her fiancé,
415 00:21:39,932 00:21:41,677 they just got engaged, they just got engaged,
416 00:21:41,701 00:21:43,546 and I wanted to send them a secret gift. and I wanted to send them a secret gift.
417 00:21:43,570 00:21:44,947 Will you let me know if they checked in already? Will you let me know if they checked in already?
418 00:21:44,971 00:21:49,352 - Well, I shouldn't, but yes, they have. - Well, I shouldn't, but yes, they have.
419 00:21:49,376 00:21:52,906 - Thank you so much. And remember, not a word! - Thank you so much. And remember, not a word!
420 00:21:55,081 00:21:58,126 - Does feel good, doesn't it? - Does feel good, doesn't it?
421 00:22:02,822 00:22:05,668 - I was doing some research, - I was doing some research,
422 00:22:05,692 00:22:07,035 and it turns out that there are some and it turns out that there are some
423 00:22:07,059 00:22:09,938 really interesting restaurants in the area. really interesting restaurants in the area.
424 00:22:09,962 00:22:12,875 One of them even grows its own produce. One of them even grows its own produce.
425 00:22:12,899 00:22:17,613 It's about an hour from here. - Sorry? It's about an hour from here. - Sorry?
426 00:22:17,637 00:22:19,748 - I was talking about lunch, you know? - I was talking about lunch, you know?
427 00:22:19,772 00:22:25,120 Leaving this place for sustenance of some kind. Leaving this place for sustenance of some kind.
428 00:22:25,144 00:22:29,392 You've got to be hungry by now. - Not really. You've got to be hungry by now. - Not really.
429 00:22:29,416 00:22:31,627 I'm gonna stay here, if you don't mind. You go. I'm gonna stay here, if you don't mind. You go.
430 00:22:31,651 00:22:33,629 - You're just gonna sit there and wait? For how long? - You're just gonna sit there and wait? For how long?
431 00:22:33,653 00:22:36,765 - However long it takes. - However long it takes.
432 00:22:36,789 00:22:41,169 - Oh, look, I gotta say that I'm feeling... - Oh, look, I gotta say that I'm feeling...
433 00:22:41,193 00:22:43,105 - What? - What?
434 00:22:43,129 00:22:44,840 - Used. - Used.
435 00:22:44,864 00:22:46,809 You didn't want to spend some time together, You didn't want to spend some time together,
436 00:22:46,833 00:22:48,844 you just wanted a chaperone for this wild goose chase. you just wanted a chaperone for this wild goose chase.
437 00:22:48,868 00:22:50,846 - No, I told you the reason why I wanted to come here. - No, I told you the reason why I wanted to come here.
438 00:22:50,870 00:22:53,649 - He didn't talk to you. He said nothing. - He didn't talk to you. He said nothing.
439 00:22:53,673 00:22:55,150 And you're just sitting here waiting! And you're just sitting here waiting!
440 00:22:55,174 00:22:57,953 - Because he was shocked to see me. He will come. - Because he was shocked to see me. He will come.
441 00:22:57,977 00:22:59,588 - How do you know? - Because I know. - How do you know? - Because I know.
442 00:22:59,612 00:23:01,089 - Oh, well, there it is. - What? - Oh, well, there it is. - What?
443 00:23:01,113 00:23:03,992 - Right there. Classic, incurable, terminal... - Right there. Classic, incurable, terminal...
444 00:23:04,016 00:23:06,929 - What? - What?
445 00:23:06,953 00:23:10,023 - Blind faith. - Blind faith.
446 00:23:16,896 00:23:18,741 - What? Are you just packing up? - What? Are you just packing up?
447 00:23:18,765 00:23:20,976 Just... Just...
448 00:23:21,000 00:23:25,648 - You know, I got into this thing... whatever this is... - You know, I got into this thing... whatever this is...
449 00:23:25,672 00:23:28,150 Because I believed that you were ready Because I believed that you were ready
450 00:23:28,174 00:23:32,120 to leave this belief. to leave this belief.
451 00:23:32,144 00:23:35,458 And I have been so patient, Sarah, And I have been so patient, Sarah,
452 00:23:35,482 00:23:37,159 in letting you go through every step. in letting you go through every step.
453 00:23:37,183 00:23:39,828 - Don't do this. - You're never gonna leave. - Don't do this. - You're never gonna leave.
454 00:23:39,852 00:23:42,631 Especially not now. Especially not now.
455 00:23:42,655 00:23:45,725 Not after your father's death. Not after your father's death.
456 00:23:47,259 00:23:51,907 It's created a vacuum of loss It's created a vacuum of loss
457 00:23:51,931 00:23:54,176 for them to fill with their narratives. for them to fill with their narratives.
458 00:23:54,200 00:23:56,244 You're just going to replace one blind faith with another. You're just going to replace one blind faith with another.
459 00:23:56,268 00:23:58,146 - You just think you have it all figured out, - You just think you have it all figured out,
460 00:23:58,170 00:24:00,916 but you don't leave any room for the possibility of... but you don't leave any room for the possibility of...
461 00:24:00,940 00:24:03,218 I don't know... something surprising or mysterious, I don't know... something surprising or mysterious,
462 00:24:03,242 00:24:05,988 or maybe not having it make complete sense! or maybe not having it make complete sense!
463 00:24:06,012 00:24:07,823 - No, there's a million things in the world - No, there's a million things in the world
464 00:24:07,847 00:24:09,157 that don't make any sense, that are mysterious. that don't make any sense, that are mysterious.
465 00:24:09,181 00:24:11,126 But you... But you...
466 00:24:11,150 00:24:14,129 You're just going deeper, and deeper, and deeper, and... You're just going deeper, and deeper, and deeper, and...
467 00:24:14,153 00:24:19,802 And I won't get sucked in, Sarah. And I won't get sucked in, Sarah.
468 00:24:19,826 00:24:22,738 - I'm sorry. - I'm sorry.
469 00:24:22,762 00:24:24,807 I have to pursue this. I have to pursue this.
470 00:24:27,834 00:24:31,880
471 00:24:36,943 00:24:38,821 - Excuse me? - Excuse me?
472 00:24:38,845 00:24:40,856 I was knocking there for a minute. I was knocking there for a minute.
473 00:24:40,880 00:24:43,191 - Sorry, I was in pretty deep. - Sorry, I was in pretty deep.
474 00:24:43,215 00:24:47,029 - I certainly do apologize for barging in on you like this, - I certainly do apologize for barging in on you like this,
475 00:24:47,053 00:24:49,231 disturbing you in the act of prayer. disturbing you in the act of prayer.
476 00:24:49,255 00:24:51,099 - That's right. - That's right.
477 00:24:51,123 00:24:53,068 - I was told this is where I'd find Eddie Lane. - I was told this is where I'd find Eddie Lane.
478 00:24:53,092 00:24:55,838 The man in charge around here. The man in charge around here.
479 00:24:55,862 00:24:57,706 - Yeah. - Yeah.
480 00:24:57,730 00:25:00,208 That's... that's me. That's... that's me.
481 00:25:00,232 00:25:02,811 - I didn't expect to see you sitting on the floor. - I didn't expect to see you sitting on the floor.
482 00:25:02,835 00:25:05,113 - Yeah, it helps me connect with the Earth. - Yeah, it helps me connect with the Earth.
483 00:25:05,137 00:25:06,248 The center of everything. The center of everything.
484 00:25:06,272 00:25:07,916 - How interesting. - How interesting.
485 00:25:07,940 00:25:10,218 In my faith, we aim for the heavens. In my faith, we aim for the heavens.
486 00:25:10,242 00:25:13,121 What's above us, not below. What's above us, not below.
487 00:25:13,145 00:25:15,023 But to each his own. But to each his own.
488 00:25:15,047 00:25:18,260 Reverend William Matthews of the Porter Mountain Church. Reverend William Matthews of the Porter Mountain Church.
489 00:25:18,284 00:25:20,996 Folks there call me Pastor Billy. Folks there call me Pastor Billy.
490 00:25:21,020 00:25:22,865 You're welcome to do the same. You're welcome to do the same.
491 00:25:22,889 00:25:24,567 - Nice to meet you. - Nice to meet you.
492 00:25:24,591 00:25:26,101 Is there something I can help you with? Is there something I can help you with?
493 00:25:26,125 00:25:28,070 - I certainly hope so. - I certainly hope so.
494 00:25:28,094 00:25:30,272 I'm here to talk to you about my son, Caleb, I'm here to talk to you about my son, Caleb,
495 00:25:30,296 00:25:32,140 and your son, Hawk. and your son, Hawk.
496 00:25:32,164 00:25:34,777 - Okay. What about him? - Okay. What about him?
497 00:25:34,801 00:25:39,214 - I see I'm going to have to be the bearer of bad news. - I see I'm going to have to be the bearer of bad news.
498 00:25:39,238 00:25:43,018 - Did they do something? - In a manner of speaking. - Did they do something? - In a manner of speaking.
499 00:25:43,042 00:25:44,352 It's been brought to my attention It's been brought to my attention
500 00:25:44,376 00:25:46,855 that their friendship is inappropriate. that their friendship is inappropriate.
501 00:25:46,879 00:25:49,057 Now it is my hope that you and I, as men of God, Now it is my hope that you and I, as men of God,
502 00:25:49,081 00:25:52,094 can come together and put a stop to it. can come together and put a stop to it.
503 00:25:52,118 00:25:55,030 - I'm sorry, I'm not following. - I'm sorry, I'm not following.
504 00:25:55,054 00:25:58,166 How is their friendship inappropriate? How is their friendship inappropriate?
505 00:25:58,190 00:26:00,202 - I don't want you to think I'm like - I don't want you to think I'm like
506 00:26:00,226 00:26:03,171 those crazy folks in Westboro, shouting death to homosexuals. those crazy folks in Westboro, shouting death to homosexuals.
507 00:26:03,195 00:26:04,873 - Wait, did you just say... - Wait, did you just say...
508 00:26:04,897 00:26:07,175 - At our church, we love the sinner. - At our church, we love the sinner.
509 00:26:07,199 00:26:09,912 But we cannot condone the sin. But we cannot condone the sin.
510 00:26:09,936 00:26:11,313 - Wait, wait. - Wait, wait.
511 00:26:11,337 00:26:16,018 Are you saying that our sons are gay together? Are you saying that our sons are gay together?
512 00:26:16,042 00:26:20,155 Look, Hawk isn't gay, okay? He would've told me. Look, Hawk isn't gay, okay? He would've told me.
513 00:26:20,179 00:26:21,924 - I understand. - I understand.
514 00:26:21,948 00:26:24,292 It's not easy to accept. Terrible. It's not easy to accept. Terrible.
515 00:26:24,316 00:26:26,228 Take your time, and when you're ready, Take your time, and when you're ready,
516 00:26:26,252 00:26:27,963 we can discuss what to do. we can discuss what to do.
517 00:26:27,987 00:26:31,366 - No, this isn't terrible, it's just... - No, this isn't terrible, it's just...
518 00:26:31,390 00:26:34,369 Listen, if your son and my son Listen, if your son and my son
519 00:26:34,393 00:26:39,207 are in a romantic something... I'm not saying that they are. are in a romantic something... I'm not saying that they are.
520 00:26:39,231 00:26:41,209 But I wouldn't do a thing about it But I wouldn't do a thing about it
521 00:26:41,233 00:26:44,179 other than accept him completely. other than accept him completely.
522 00:26:44,203 00:26:46,649 I'm not gonna love him one bit less. I'm not gonna love him one bit less.
523 00:26:46,673 00:26:49,117 - You think I don't love my son? - You think I don't love my son?
524 00:26:49,141 00:26:50,886 You think that's what this is? You think that's what this is?
525 00:26:50,910 00:26:52,220 That I don't love him? That I don't love him?
526 00:26:52,244 00:26:55,090 I love him so much that I will not spend I love him so much that I will not spend
527 00:26:55,114 00:26:58,026 an eternity separated from him. an eternity separated from him.
528 00:26:58,050 00:27:00,963 Not because some hippy boy lured him into a sex trap. Not because some hippy boy lured him into a sex trap.
529 00:27:00,987 00:27:04,232 - Hey, I don't know who you think that we are, - Hey, I don't know who you think that we are,
530 00:27:04,256 00:27:06,935 but to be honest, I don't care. but to be honest, I don't care.
531 00:27:06,959 00:27:12,240 You can think whatever the hell you want about us. You can think whatever the hell you want about us.
532 00:27:12,264 00:27:18,246 But I cannot change who your son is, and neither can you. But I cannot change who your son is, and neither can you.
533 00:27:18,270 00:27:20,248 So whatever you came here to ask... So whatever you came here to ask...
534 00:27:20,272 00:27:22,885 - You don't worry about who he is. I'll take care of that. - You don't worry about who he is. I'll take care of that.
535 00:27:22,909 00:27:26,388 Why don't you focus on your own? Why don't you focus on your own?
536 00:27:26,412 00:27:29,291 You don't even know what he's doing. You don't even know what he's doing.
537 00:27:32,318 00:27:39,388
538 00:27:42,128 00:27:43,471 - Should we wait for Vera to begin? - Should we wait for Vera to begin?
539 00:27:43,495 00:27:45,874 - I don't believe she'll be coming tonight. - I don't believe she'll be coming tonight.
540 00:27:45,898 00:27:46,909 - Is everything okay? - Is everything okay?
541 00:27:46,933 00:27:51,914 - Everything's fine. - Everything's fine.
542 00:27:51,938 00:27:53,716 - Your pulse is racing. - Your pulse is racing.
543 00:27:53,740 00:27:56,418 You should sit. You should sit.
544 00:27:56,442 00:27:59,054 - I haven't heard from her since she got back from France. - I haven't heard from her since she got back from France.
545 00:27:59,078 00:28:00,923 She won't return my calls. She won't return my calls.
546 00:28:00,947 00:28:03,025 - Well, did you do something to upset her? - Well, did you do something to upset her?
547 00:28:03,049 00:28:05,719 - It's my fault? - Of course not. - It's my fault? - Of course not.
548 00:28:07,453 00:28:09,197 - I want you to call her. - I want you to call her.
549 00:28:09,221 00:28:10,365 - What do you want me to say? - What do you want me to say?
550 00:28:10,389 00:28:12,500 - The truth about my illness. - The truth about my illness.
551 00:28:12,524 00:28:14,737 Maybe she'll listen if it comes from you. Maybe she'll listen if it comes from you.
552 00:28:14,761 00:28:16,438 - I thought you didn't want to upset her. - I thought you didn't want to upset her.
553 00:28:16,462 00:28:18,473 - I didn't. - I didn't.
554 00:28:18,497 00:28:21,927 But it's time. But it's time.
555 00:28:28,540 00:28:31,940 Let's go inside and begin. Let's go inside and begin.
556 00:28:42,088 00:28:46,068
557 00:28:46,092 00:28:48,136 I just spoke with Vera. I just spoke with Vera.
558 00:28:48,160 00:28:51,106 Unfortunately, she won't be able to join us today. Unfortunately, she won't be able to join us today.
559 00:28:51,130 00:28:55,077 But she asked me to relay fantastic news. But she asked me to relay fantastic news.
560 00:28:55,101 00:28:57,212 France was a rousing success. France was a rousing success.
561 00:28:57,236 00:29:02,150 Felicia Pickard has been named Guardian of the Third Corner. Felicia Pickard has been named Guardian of the Third Corner.
562 00:29:02,174 00:29:04,452 - It's everything you predicted. - It's everything you predicted.
563 00:29:04,476 00:29:09,224 - It's not long now, is it? The cleansing of the Earth? - It's not long now, is it? The cleansing of the Earth?
564 00:29:09,248 00:29:13,128 We're gonna be free of what this world has become. We're gonna be free of what this world has become.
565 00:29:13,152 00:29:16,464 - Yes. - Yes.
566 00:29:16,488 00:29:17,966 Yes. Yes.
567 00:29:20,526 00:29:24,526
568 00:29:40,847 00:29:44,047 - Hey. - Hey. - Hey. - Hey.
569 00:29:52,859 00:29:56,204 - I'm sorry, I'm just trying to not break the yoke. - I'm sorry, I'm just trying to not break the yoke.
570 00:29:56,228 00:29:58,140 - You're making breakfast? - You're making breakfast?
571 00:29:58,164 00:30:01,343 - I always made breakfast. - You never made breakfast. - I always made breakfast. - You never made breakfast.
572 00:30:01,367 00:30:03,511 - Right. I knew it was one or the other. - Right. I knew it was one or the other.
573 00:30:07,573 00:30:09,813 You feel guilty. You feel guilty.
574 00:30:11,577 00:30:13,488 Is it because I have a girlfriend? Is it because I have a girlfriend?
575 00:30:13,512 00:30:15,557 - No, no, no. - No, no, no.
576 00:30:15,581 00:30:17,092 No. No.
577 00:30:17,116 00:30:19,194 - It's because of the other guy. - It's because of the other guy.
578 00:30:19,218 00:30:22,630 The one you actually want to be making breakfast for. The one you actually want to be making breakfast for.
579 00:30:22,654 00:30:26,168 - Well, it's not just him. - Well, it's not just him.
580 00:30:26,192 00:30:30,538 He's part of this whole community and I was... He's part of this whole community and I was...
581 00:30:30,562 00:30:34,176 I was actually happy there sometimes. I was actually happy there sometimes.
582 00:30:34,200 00:30:36,144 Can you imagine that? Can you imagine that?
583 00:30:36,168 00:30:37,579 - Mm. Not... not really. - Mm. Not... not really.
584 00:30:37,603 00:30:40,315 I've heard of such things, but... I've heard of such things, but...
585 00:30:41,640 00:30:44,619 Is that your mother? Is that your mother?
586 00:30:51,450 00:30:53,328 Is it your mother? Is it your mother?
587 00:30:53,352 00:30:56,231 - I don't recognize the number. - It's your mother. - I don't recognize the number. - It's your mother.
588 00:30:56,255 00:30:57,632 Go ahead, answer it. Go ahead, answer it.
589 00:30:57,656 00:31:00,602 You're gonna run back to her eventually. You're gonna run back to her eventually.
590 00:31:00,626 00:31:04,472 I'm sorry, I didn't mean it to be... I'm sorry, I didn't mean it to be...
591 00:31:04,496 00:31:06,474 Listen, I'm gonna hop in the shower. Listen, I'm gonna hop in the shower.
592 00:31:06,498 00:31:08,210 It would really help me It would really help me
593 00:31:08,234 00:31:11,304 if you wouldn't be here when I get out. if you wouldn't be here when I get out.
594 00:31:21,247 00:31:23,091 - Vera, it's Dr. Costa. - Vera, it's Dr. Costa.
595 00:31:23,115 00:31:25,127 I need to talk to you about your mother's health. I need to talk to you about your mother's health.
596 00:31:25,151 00:31:28,263 - Thank you so much for doing this with me. - Thank you so much for doing this with me.
597 00:31:28,287 00:31:30,132 I thought we owed it to your grandfather I thought we owed it to your grandfather
598 00:31:30,156 00:31:32,300 to finish what he started. to finish what he started.
599 00:31:32,324 00:31:36,404 Anything new in your life lately going on? Anything new in your life lately going on?
600 00:31:36,428 00:31:37,705 - Not really, no. - Not really, no.
601 00:31:37,729 00:31:40,475 - No? - No?
602 00:31:40,499 00:31:42,244 - What? - What?
603 00:31:42,268 00:31:43,378 - Nothing you want to talk to me about, or... - Nothing you want to talk to me about, or...
604 00:31:43,402 00:31:45,948 - No. - No.
605 00:31:45,972 00:31:51,182 - Because you know, I was visited by Reverend Matthews. - Because you know, I was visited by Reverend Matthews.
606 00:31:53,279 00:31:54,256 - What? - What?
607 00:31:54,280 00:31:55,690 - Caleb's father. - Caleb's father.
608 00:31:55,714 00:31:58,260 - I don't understand, what... - I don't understand, what...
609 00:31:58,284 00:32:00,262 - I'm not mad at you, okay? - I'm not mad at you, okay?
610 00:32:00,286 00:32:02,597 I just want to talk to you about this. I just want to talk to you about this.
611 00:32:02,621 00:32:04,399 - What did he say? What did he... - What did he say? What did he...
612 00:32:04,423 00:32:06,734 - Kid, I am on your side 100%, okay? - Kid, I am on your side 100%, okay?
613 00:32:06,758 00:32:08,336 You need to know that. You need to know that.
614 00:32:08,360 00:32:10,272 - Just tell me what he told you! - Just tell me what he told you!
615 00:32:10,296 00:32:13,675 - He said that you and his son were in a relationship. - He said that you and his son were in a relationship.
616 00:32:13,699 00:32:16,969 A romantic relationship. A romantic relationship.
617 00:32:22,374 00:32:26,554 Hey, bud. Just talk to me. It's fine. Hey, bud. Just talk to me. It's fine.
618 00:32:26,578 00:32:29,457 - This is not how I wanted you to find out. - This is not how I wanted you to find out.
619 00:32:29,481 00:32:32,394 Literally, the last possible way. Literally, the last possible way.
620 00:32:32,418 00:32:34,997 - Okay, look, it's done, all right? - Okay, look, it's done, all right?
621 00:32:35,021 00:32:39,167 Just tell me what's going on. Just tell me what's going on.
622 00:32:39,191 00:32:41,736 - Nothing, okay? Nothing's going on. - Nothing, okay? Nothing's going on.
623 00:32:41,760 00:32:44,606 I'm not different. I don't feel any different. I'm not different. I don't feel any different.
624 00:32:44,630 00:32:47,642 I just met someone and they happen to be a guy! I just met someone and they happen to be a guy!
625 00:32:47,666 00:32:52,414 - Okay, look, I just... I wish you would've come to me. - Okay, look, I just... I wish you would've come to me.
626 00:32:52,438 00:32:54,249 You must've been struggling... You must've been struggling...
627 00:32:54,273 00:32:55,617 - Yeah, I wasn't really struggling, actually. - Yeah, I wasn't really struggling, actually.
628 00:32:55,641 00:32:58,586 - Hawk, it kills me that you didn't feel like - Hawk, it kills me that you didn't feel like
629 00:32:58,610 00:33:01,689 you could talk to me about this. you could talk to me about this.
630 00:33:01,713 00:33:03,525 - As my leader? - As my leader?
631 00:33:03,549 00:33:05,693 As the Guardian of the Light, or as my Dad? As the Guardian of the Light, or as my Dad?
632 00:33:05,717 00:33:09,464 - Hey, I'm your father first and foremost, - Hey, I'm your father first and foremost,
633 00:33:09,488 00:33:14,269 but I cannot support you unless I know what is going on. but I cannot support you unless I know what is going on.
634 00:33:14,293 00:33:19,541 Look, I'm not going to judge you or love you any less. Look, I'm not going to judge you or love you any less.
635 00:33:19,565 00:33:23,478 But you gotta talk to me. But you gotta talk to me.
636 00:33:23,502 00:33:25,447 - All right, where's Mom? - All right, where's Mom?
637 00:33:25,471 00:33:27,449 Who's she with? What is she doing? Who's she with? What is she doing?
638 00:33:27,473 00:33:30,285 And why is everyone pretending like it's completely normal And why is everyone pretending like it's completely normal
639 00:33:30,309 00:33:33,388 when it is in fact super fucked up? when it is in fact super fucked up?
640 00:33:33,412 00:33:36,424 - I wish I knew. - I wish I knew.
641 00:33:36,448 00:33:37,592 Okay? Okay?
642 00:33:37,616 00:33:44,232 I really don't, Hawk. I really don't, Hawk.
643 00:33:44,256 00:33:46,401 - So why did you ask me to help you finish - So why did you ask me to help you finish
644 00:33:46,425 00:33:48,603 my dead grandfather's tree house my dead grandfather's tree house
645 00:33:48,627 00:33:51,506 when all you wanted to do was grill me about my private life? when all you wanted to do was grill me about my private life?
646 00:33:51,530 00:33:56,078 - I wanted to spend some time with you man to man. - I wanted to spend some time with you man to man.
647 00:33:56,102 00:34:00,782 - Yeah, well, here's my Reflection, all right? - Yeah, well, here's my Reflection, all right?
648 00:34:00,806 00:34:07,407 My relationship with Caleb is my business. My relationship with Caleb is my business.
649 00:34:09,681 00:34:13,561 We're given only as much pain as we can bear. We're given only as much pain as we can bear.
650 00:34:13,585 00:34:17,699 - We're given only as much pain as we can bear. - We're given only as much pain as we can bear.
651 00:34:17,723 00:34:20,402 - Why are we here? - Why are we here?
652 00:34:20,426 00:34:22,870 - 'Cause I'm asking people to Reflect - 'Cause I'm asking people to Reflect
653 00:34:22,894 00:34:26,541 and Refine when I haven't myself. and Refine when I haven't myself.
654 00:34:26,565 00:34:30,345 -Why not? What's holding you back? -Why not? What's holding you back?
655 00:34:30,369 00:34:33,348 - My fear. - My fear.
656 00:34:33,372 00:34:36,551 - What are you afraid of? - What are you afraid of?
657 00:34:36,575 00:34:38,720 - Losing them. - Losing them.
658 00:34:38,744 00:34:40,814 - Who? Who are you losing? - Who? Who are you losing?
659 00:34:46,485 00:34:48,330 People. People.
660 00:34:48,354 00:34:49,831 My followers. My followers.
661 00:34:49,855 00:34:51,899 I'm losing them. I'm losing them.
662 00:34:51,923 00:34:55,570 My... my son. My... my son.
663 00:34:55,594 00:34:57,605 - You're son. Good. - You're son. Good.
664 00:34:57,629 00:35:00,342 - My boy. - My boy.
665 00:35:00,366 00:35:04,312 - Why are you losing him? - Why are you losing him?
666 00:35:04,336 00:35:07,549 - He doesn't trust me anymore. - He doesn't trust me anymore.
667 00:35:07,573 00:35:11,853 - Fear. We know the symptoms. - Fear. We know the symptoms.
668 00:35:11,877 00:35:15,523 Now let's find the Transgress, the distraction. Now let's find the Transgress, the distraction.
669 00:35:20,586 00:35:22,830 Vera! Vera!
670 00:35:22,854 00:35:25,600 - Vera? - Vera. - Vera? - Vera.
671 00:35:25,624 00:35:27,369 - Vera's a beautiful distraction. - Vera's a beautiful distraction.
672 00:35:27,393 00:35:29,604 Secular, skilled in the ways of the world. Secular, skilled in the ways of the world.
673 00:35:29,628 00:35:33,508 Is she really the thing? Is she really the thing?
674 00:35:33,532 00:35:36,644 Say it, Eddie! I want to get out of here as much as you! Say it, Eddie! I want to get out of here as much as you!
675 00:35:36,668 00:35:39,381 Maybe not as much. Maybe not as much.
676 00:35:39,405 00:35:43,418 You can only be free if you say it. You can only be free if you say it.
677 00:35:43,442 00:35:45,620 Who is it you're holding onto? Who is it you're holding onto?
678 00:35:49,748 00:35:51,626 - Sarah! - Sarah!
679 00:35:51,650 00:35:55,930 - Sarah. Sarah. - Sarah. Sarah.
680 00:35:55,954 00:35:57,632 - Sarah. - Sarah.
681 00:35:57,656 00:35:59,501 - Yes! - Yes!
682 00:35:59,525 00:36:03,671 - Sarah is at the Yellow Birch Inn - Sarah is at the Yellow Birch Inn
683 00:36:03,695 00:36:07,475 having a romantic getaway with a man. having a romantic getaway with a man.
684 00:36:07,499 00:36:11,779 A lover. A lover.
685 00:36:11,803 00:36:15,917 So what's the real burden, Eddie? So what's the real burden, Eddie?
686 00:36:15,941 00:36:18,741 What can you bear no more? What can you bear no more?
687 00:36:23,582 00:36:26,694 - That I can get hundreds, - That I can get hundreds,
688 00:36:26,718 00:36:30,998 thousands of people to believe, thousands of people to believe,
689 00:36:31,022 00:36:32,767 but not her. but not her.
690 00:36:35,794 00:36:40,404
691 00:36:40,732 00:36:42,910 - Anyone joining you this morning? - Anyone joining you this morning?
692 00:36:42,934 00:36:46,848 - Uh, no. I thought maybe but, um... - Uh, no. I thought maybe but, um...
693 00:36:46,872 00:36:48,942 Time to go, thank you. Time to go, thank you.
694 00:36:54,946 00:36:58,660
695 00:36:58,684 00:37:00,862 - I shouldn't have come. I should've stayed away. - I shouldn't have come. I should've stayed away.
696 00:37:00,886 00:37:02,597 - Please, I'm glad you did. - Please, I'm glad you did.
697 00:37:02,621 00:37:04,732 Do you want to get a cup of coffee inside? Do you want to get a cup of coffee inside?
698 00:37:04,756 00:37:06,968 - I can't stay, but I didn't want to let you go - I can't stay, but I didn't want to let you go
699 00:37:06,992 00:37:09,704 without at least talking to you about the past, without at least talking to you about the past,
700 00:37:09,728 00:37:12,607 about the questions you were asking. about the questions you were asking.
701 00:37:12,631 00:37:14,742 I haven't heard Lilith's name in years. I haven't heard Lilith's name in years.
702 00:37:14,766 00:37:17,845 I thought I'd never hear it again. I thought I'd never hear it again.
703 00:37:17,869 00:37:20,014 But it makes sense that you would bring her back But it makes sense that you would bring her back
704 00:37:20,038 00:37:22,984 into my consciousness. into my consciousness.
705 00:37:23,008 00:37:25,587 She was a gifted woman too. She was a gifted woman too.
706 00:37:25,611 00:37:27,455 Full of light and inspiration. Full of light and inspiration.
707 00:37:27,479 00:37:29,624 She made great contributions in her early days. She made great contributions in her early days.
708 00:37:29,648 00:37:33,628 - I've read her writings. I can see that. - I've read her writings. I can see that.
709 00:37:33,652 00:37:36,864 - But she was also touched by madness. - But she was also touched by madness.
710 00:37:36,888 00:37:40,935 Broken by trauma and pain that Steve... Broken by trauma and pain that Steve...
711 00:37:40,959 00:37:44,672 - That Steve couldn't heal? - That Steve couldn't heal?
712 00:37:44,696 00:37:47,509 - That he fed on. - That he fed on.
713 00:37:47,533 00:37:48,876 Used. Used.
714 00:37:48,900 00:37:51,640 Assimilated into his system of belief. Assimilated into his system of belief.
715 00:37:53,739 00:37:56,751 And then he sent her away. And then he sent her away.
716 00:37:56,775 00:37:59,487 Denied her credit, denied her very existence. Denied her credit, denied her very existence.
717 00:37:59,511 00:38:03,090 - All of you knew about it, everyone from the early days. - All of you knew about it, everyone from the early days.
718 00:38:03,114 00:38:06,928 You, my mother, my father. You, my mother, my father.
719 00:38:06,952 00:38:11,032 My God, how could you knowingly treat her that way? My God, how could you knowingly treat her that way?
720 00:38:11,056 00:38:13,735 - There's no excuse. - There's no excuse.
721 00:38:13,759 00:38:17,972 But when you're enveloped in faith, you rationalize things. But when you're enveloped in faith, you rationalize things.
722 00:38:17,996 00:38:20,542 Little things at first, for the greater good. Little things at first, for the greater good.
723 00:38:20,566 00:38:23,845 The bigger things and bigger until... The bigger things and bigger until...
724 00:38:23,869 00:38:25,580 one day the clouds part, one day the clouds part,
725 00:38:25,604 00:38:26,914 and you don't even recognize yourself. and you don't even recognize yourself.
726 00:38:26,938 00:38:31,085 - Is this how all religion ends up? - Is this how all religion ends up?
727 00:38:31,109 00:38:35,823 Preaching love, and truth, and peace, and... Preaching love, and truth, and peace, and...
728 00:38:35,847 00:38:40,962 You're sitting on buried secrets and lies. You're sitting on buried secrets and lies.
729 00:38:40,986 00:38:42,964 - Maybe. - Maybe.
730 00:38:42,988 00:38:44,966 Maybe that's the cost of faith. Maybe that's the cost of faith.
731 00:38:44,990 00:38:47,802 - Is Lilith alive? Can I contact her? - Is Lilith alive? Can I contact her?
732 00:38:47,826 00:38:49,937 - She's alive. - She's alive.
733 00:38:49,961 00:38:52,807 But if you contact her, she might tell you things, Sarah, But if you contact her, she might tell you things, Sarah,
734 00:38:52,831 00:38:54,776 that make it impossible for you to go back. that make it impossible for you to go back.
735 00:38:54,800 00:38:56,844 - I've already given up so much already. - I've already given up so much already.
736 00:38:56,868 00:38:59,814 That's a chance I'm willing to take. That's a chance I'm willing to take.
737 00:38:59,838 00:39:04,752 You have contact with her. Do you know where she is? You have contact with her. Do you know where she is?
738 00:39:04,776 00:39:07,021 - No, I haven't been in contact with her over the years, - No, I haven't been in contact with her over the years,
739 00:39:07,045 00:39:10,057 but I've been aware of her. but I've been aware of her.
740 00:39:10,081 00:39:12,093 She's a veterinarian. She's a veterinarian.
741 00:39:12,117 00:39:14,696 On Riverside and 72nd Street. On Riverside and 72nd Street.
742 00:39:14,720 00:39:16,998 I know. I know.
743 00:39:17,022 00:39:18,966 She took to healing animals. She took to healing animals.
744 00:39:18,990 00:39:21,603 It's an impulse I understand. It's an impulse I understand.
745 00:39:24,630 00:39:31,112
746 00:39:31,136 00:39:33,881 - Did you remember the canola oil? - Did you remember the canola oil?
747 00:39:33,905 00:39:34,949 - Was it on the list? - Was it on the list?
748 00:39:34,973 00:39:36,784 - No, but I told you. - No, but I told you.
749 00:39:36,808 00:39:38,753 - If it's not on the list, it doesn't happen. - If it's not on the list, it doesn't happen.
750 00:39:38,777 00:39:40,988 Stop making me feel like a failure. Stop making me feel like a failure.
751 00:39:41,012 00:39:44,191 - Hey, we're on the same team here. - Hey, we're on the same team here.
752 00:39:44,215 00:39:46,861 Is this about Eddie? Is this about Eddie?
753 00:39:46,885 00:39:50,898 - This was gonna be the year that things got better. - This was gonna be the year that things got better.
754 00:39:50,922 00:39:52,900 Had some responsibility. Had some responsibility.
755 00:39:52,924 00:39:54,869 Respect. Respect.
756 00:39:54,893 00:39:57,004 - You know what this is really about? - You know what this is really about?
757 00:39:57,028 00:39:58,906 Sarah. Sarah.
758 00:39:58,930 00:40:01,008 Ever since she decided to go on walkabout, Ever since she decided to go on walkabout,
759 00:40:01,032 00:40:03,845 it's like Eddie makes us all suffer. it's like Eddie makes us all suffer.
760 00:40:03,869 00:40:06,013 - Sarah sneezes, we all get a cold. - Sarah sneezes, we all get a cold.
761 00:40:06,037 00:40:07,782 - Now this Refinement decree? - Now this Refinement decree?
762 00:40:07,806 00:40:09,150 What are we supposed to give up? What are we supposed to give up?
763 00:40:09,174 00:40:11,653 I mean, look at us. What's left? I mean, look at us. What's left?
764 00:40:36,802 00:40:39,647 - What are you giving up? - Nothing. - What are you giving up? - Nothing.
765 00:40:39,671 00:40:41,816 Dad comes back from France ranting and raving Dad comes back from France ranting and raving
766 00:40:41,840 00:40:45,186 about how everyone's not working hard enough. about how everyone's not working hard enough.
767 00:40:45,210 00:40:49,924 Mom's off who knows where? They're enough as it is. Mom's off who knows where? They're enough as it is.
768 00:40:49,948 00:40:53,018 - You still haven't heard from him? - You still haven't heard from him?
769 00:40:55,220 00:40:58,933 I'm really sorry, Hawk. I'm really sorry, Hawk.
770 00:40:58,957 00:41:01,102 - Thanks. - Thanks.
771 00:41:01,126 00:41:03,971 - And even though we're divorced, - And even though we're divorced,
772 00:41:03,995 00:41:06,155 I still relied on him. I still relied on him.
773 00:41:08,534 00:41:11,679 I looked to him for my own self-worth. I looked to him for my own self-worth.
774 00:41:11,703 00:41:14,248 And from this day forward, And from this day forward,
775 00:41:14,272 00:41:17,952 I am never speaking to that bastard again! I am never speaking to that bastard again!
776 00:41:17,976 00:41:22,089 - All I ever cared about until right now - All I ever cared about until right now
777 00:41:22,113 00:41:24,726 was likes on Instagram. was likes on Instagram.
778 00:41:24,750 00:41:26,027 - But no more. - But no more.
779 00:41:26,051 00:41:29,263 No more mustard, no more cigarettes. No more mustard, no more cigarettes.
780 00:41:29,287 00:41:32,934 My body is my body. My body is my body.
781 00:41:38,196 00:41:42,777 - Wow. I am so proud of all of you. - Wow. I am so proud of all of you.
782 00:41:42,801 00:41:45,813 Your commitment to finding a deeper connection Your commitment to finding a deeper connection
783 00:41:45,837 00:41:50,151 to your faith is... it warms my heart. to your faith is... it warms my heart.
784 00:41:50,175 00:41:55,790 You know, as a leader, I can sometimes lose my own way. You know, as a leader, I can sometimes lose my own way.
785 00:41:55,814 00:41:59,927 I can sometimes lose focus of what is at the core I can sometimes lose focus of what is at the core
786 00:41:59,951 00:42:02,096 of this for me. of this for me.
787 00:42:02,120 00:42:06,333 And what that is is all of you. And what that is is all of you.
788 00:42:06,357 00:42:08,035 This beautiful community. This beautiful community.
789 00:42:28,146 00:42:30,546 - I have something to sacrifice. - I have something to sacrifice.
790 00:42:33,251 00:42:38,800 A gift that I'm ashamed to admit A gift that I'm ashamed to admit
791 00:42:38,824 00:42:41,294 I thought might make me happy. I thought might make me happy.
792 00:42:44,295 00:42:47,008 Turns out... Turns out...
793 00:42:48,934 00:42:54,344 Turns out it was nothing but one gigantic distraction. Turns out it was nothing but one gigantic distraction.
794 00:42:59,144 00:43:06,224
795 00:43:19,397 00:43:26,837
796 00:43:38,283 00:43:40,995 - Yeah. - ALL RIGHT. - Yeah. - ALL RIGHT.
797 00:43:43,989 00:43:46,033 - Whoo. - Nice. - Whoo. - Nice.
798 00:43:49,995 00:43:55,168 - I, um... - I thought about keeping it. - I, um... - I thought about keeping it.
799 00:43:58,403 00:44:00,181 - Go, Gaby! - Go, Gaby!
800 00:44:00,205 00:44:01,348 - Yeah, Grandma! - Yeah, Grandma!
801 00:44:01,372 00:44:03,050 - All right! - All right!
802 00:44:03,074 00:44:04,919 - Whoo! - Yeah! - Whoo! - Yeah!
803 00:44:07,278 00:44:09,857 - It's okay. - It's okay.
804 00:44:09,881 00:44:11,693 You did well. You did well.
805 00:44:11,717 00:44:14,147 Thank you for inspiring me. Thank you for inspiring me.
806 00:44:25,063 00:44:32,143
807 00:44:47,118 00:44:50,397 - Dr. Costa said your tumor was spreading. - Dr. Costa said your tumor was spreading.
808 00:44:50,421 00:44:52,734 - I'm taking the medicine. - I'm taking the medicine.
809 00:44:52,758 00:44:54,902 I'll have the surgery. I'll have the surgery.
810 00:44:54,926 00:44:56,337 It's nothing. It's nothing.
811 00:44:56,361 00:44:59,040 We have more important matters to discuss. We have more important matters to discuss.
812 00:44:59,064 00:45:00,742 - What's more important? - What's more important?
813 00:45:00,766 00:45:03,210 - Why haven't you called? - Why haven't you called?
814 00:45:03,234 00:45:05,312 What happened after France? What happened after France?
815 00:45:05,336 00:45:13,320 Did Eddie... He rejected you. Did Eddie... He rejected you.
816 00:45:13,344 00:45:15,456 It hurts, but it's for the best. It hurts, but it's for the best.
817 00:45:15,480 00:45:19,026 - Just like Remy. - What? - Just like Remy. - What?
818 00:45:19,050 00:45:22,363 - You said the same when Remy left me, - You said the same when Remy left me,
819 00:45:22,387 00:45:26,968 when he'd had enough of this, of us, when he'd had enough of this, of us,
820 00:45:26,992 00:45:28,469 you said it was for the best. you said it was for the best.
821 00:45:28,493 00:45:31,038 - Okay, but what does this have to do with Remy? - Okay, but what does this have to do with Remy?
822 00:45:31,062 00:45:32,439 - He was my husband. - He was my husband.
823 00:45:32,463 00:45:34,508 - He was a detour. He wasn't your destiny. - He was a detour. He wasn't your destiny.
824 00:45:34,532 00:45:36,778 - I wanted a family. - I wanted a family.
825 00:45:36,802 00:45:38,512 A life apart from us! A life apart from us!
826 00:45:38,536 00:45:41,348 I wanted children. I still want that! I wanted children. I still want that!
827 00:45:41,372 00:45:43,084 - And you'll have that. - And you'll have that.
828 00:45:43,108 00:45:45,352 After The Fire, you will meet someone. After The Fire, you will meet someone.
829 00:45:45,376 00:45:49,523 You will raise your children in a better world. You will raise your children in a better world.
830 00:45:49,547 00:45:53,027 - Are you even sick? - Are you even sick?
831 00:45:53,051 00:45:54,428 - Of course I am. - Of course I am.
832 00:45:54,452 00:45:58,065 - I asked you many times about your illness, - I asked you many times about your illness,
833 00:45:58,089 00:45:59,533 and you kept telling me that you were fine. and you kept telling me that you were fine.
834 00:45:59,557 00:46:02,236 So were you lying then, or are you lying now? So were you lying then, or are you lying now?
835 00:46:02,260 00:46:07,441 - If I ever softened the truth, it was only to protect you. - If I ever softened the truth, it was only to protect you.
836 00:46:07,465 00:46:11,345 - And the scar on my back? - And the scar on my back?
837 00:46:11,369 00:46:16,417 Yeah, the one you burned into me. Yeah, the one you burned into me.
838 00:46:16,441 00:46:23,157 Was that to protect me too? Was that to protect me too?
839 00:46:23,181 00:46:24,558 - I was ill. - I was ill.
840 00:46:24,582 00:46:27,394 Those people, they made me ill. Those people, they made me ill.
841 00:46:27,418 00:46:29,263 - I shouldn't have come... - I shouldn't have come...
842 00:46:29,287 00:46:31,265 It's never your fault, is it? It's never your fault, is it?
843 00:46:31,289 00:46:34,401 - I carry the shame of what I did to you every day. - I carry the shame of what I did to you every day.
844 00:46:34,425 00:46:39,273 But I'm glad you know because we can talk about this now. But I'm glad you know because we can talk about this now.
845 00:46:39,297 00:46:41,442 Like we always do, you and me. Like we always do, you and me.
846 00:46:41,466 00:46:44,511 Always. Always.
847 00:46:47,538 00:46:54,578
848 00:47:03,889 00:47:07,089 - Good-bye, Mom. - Good-bye, Mom.
849 00:47:22,107 00:47:26,053 - Mom. - Mom.
850 00:47:26,077 00:47:27,521 - It's so late! - It's so late!
851 00:47:27,545 00:47:29,423 - Yeah, I told her she could stay up - Yeah, I told her she could stay up
852 00:47:29,447 00:47:31,458 as long as she went to bed as soon as you got home. as long as she went to bed as soon as you got home.
853 00:47:31,482 00:47:33,594 - I missed you. - I missed you too, pumpkin. - I missed you. - I missed you too, pumpkin.
854 00:47:33,618 00:47:35,262 So much. So much.
855 00:47:35,286 00:47:37,498 I'll see you in the morning, okay? I'll see you in the morning, okay?
856 00:47:37,522 00:47:39,862 - Good night, honey. - Good night, honey.
857 00:47:45,230 00:47:48,309 - Thank you for being here. I know that it was... - Thank you for being here. I know that it was...
858 00:47:48,333 00:47:50,577 - Look, Sarah, don't, okay? - Look, Sarah, don't, okay?
859 00:47:50,601 00:47:54,481 No apologies or excuses... - I wasn't apologizing. No apologies or excuses... - I wasn't apologizing.
860 00:47:54,505 00:47:56,217 I was trying to explain why I had to leave. I was trying to explain why I had to leave.
861 00:47:56,241 00:47:58,085 - All right, well, no more explaining. - All right, well, no more explaining.
862 00:47:58,109 00:47:59,620 There's nothing more to explain. There's nothing more to explain.
863 00:47:59,644 00:48:03,124 Look, I just want to... I just want to say something, Look, I just want to... I just want to say something,
864 00:48:03,148 00:48:05,692 so just let me get it out, let me say it. so just let me get it out, let me say it.
865 00:48:05,716 00:48:09,663 - Okay. - Okay.
866 00:48:09,687 00:48:13,600 - Look, people have been joining the Movement - Look, people have been joining the Movement
867 00:48:13,624 00:48:15,636 by the hundreds. by the hundreds.
868 00:48:15,660 00:48:17,638 Thousands. Thousands.
869 00:48:17,662 00:48:19,506 Following me. Following me.
870 00:48:19,530 00:48:22,643 They're putting their trust, their faith, They're putting their trust, their faith,
871 00:48:22,667 00:48:27,281 their lives in my hands. their lives in my hands.
872 00:48:27,305 00:48:28,715 And I can... And I can...
873 00:48:28,739 00:48:31,953 I can't focus on what I'm supposed to be doing, I can't focus on what I'm supposed to be doing,
874 00:48:31,977 00:48:35,957 because all I'm doing is thinking about you. because all I'm doing is thinking about you.
875 00:48:35,981 00:48:37,558 - Eddie... - No. - Eddie... - No.
876 00:48:37,582 00:48:40,394 You questioning. You questioning.
877 00:48:40,418 00:48:43,730 One foot in, one foot out. One foot in, one foot out.
878 00:48:43,754 00:48:45,399 - I'm sorry. - I'm sorry.
879 00:48:45,423 00:48:49,603 - No, I don't want your apologies. - No, I don't want your apologies.
880 00:48:49,627 00:48:54,141 I want you to leave us. I want you to leave us.
881 00:48:54,165 00:48:55,509 Just make it official. Just make it official.
882 00:48:55,533 00:48:57,478 What you've been doing for months now What you've been doing for months now
883 00:48:57,502 00:49:01,482 slowly, slowly just drifting away, slowly, slowly just drifting away,
884 00:49:01,506 00:49:04,518 just rip it off now. just rip it off now.
885 00:49:04,542 00:49:05,686 Just leave the Movement. Just leave the Movement.
886 00:49:05,710 00:49:08,255 - No, I won't leave my family. - No, I won't leave my family.
887 00:49:08,279 00:49:10,424 Ever. Ever.
888 00:49:10,448 00:49:12,559 - I am not asking you to do that. - I am not asking you to do that.
889 00:49:12,583 00:49:14,595 - What if I'm not ready? I have questions, I do, - What if I'm not ready? I have questions, I do,
890 00:49:14,619 00:49:17,559 but this is my life. but this is my life.
891 00:49:19,424 00:49:22,234 - Then do it for me. - Then do it for me.
892 00:49:24,662 00:49:27,541 Please. Please.
893 00:49:27,565 00:49:35,549 I have Reflected, and what I've found, I have Reflected, and what I've found,
894 00:49:35,573 00:49:39,713 what is holding me back from my Refinement... what is holding me back from my Refinement...
895 00:49:42,247 00:49:45,592 is you. is you.
896 00:49:47,385 00:49:49,363 Okay. Okay.
897 00:49:49,387 00:49:52,599 You're right. You're right.
898 00:49:52,623 00:49:56,293 I shouldn't peddle something I think is broken. I shouldn't peddle something I think is broken.
899 00:49:58,496 00:50:01,475 Not anymore. Not anymore.
900 00:50:04,502 00:50:11,542
901 00:50:31,596 00:50:38,666
902 00:50:53,418 00:50:55,629 - I want to become a Meyerist. - I want to become a Meyerist.
903 00:50:58,656 00:51:05,696
904 00:51:20,378 00:51:23,448 - You found me. - You found me.
905 00:51:28,153 00:51:36,153 ♪ Stay ♪ Ooh ♪ No one ever said ♪ Stay ♪ Ooh ♪ No one ever said
906 00:51:44,702 00:51:52,702 ♪ That you remind me ♪ Whoa ♪ That you remind me ♪ Whoa
907 00:52:01,619 00:52:04,459 ♪ Sticks and stones ♪ Sticks and stones