# Start End Original Translated
1 00:00:05,473 00:00:07,184 All right, let's get last looks on these guys All right, let's get last looks on these guys
2 00:00:07,208 00:00:09,743 and let's do it again. and let's do it again.
3 00:00:11,612 00:00:12,713 And And
4 00:00:13,147 00:00:14,147 action. action.
5 00:00:14,748 00:00:15,816 (laughs) (laughs)
6 00:00:15,849 00:00:16,750 Gees, Santa. Gees, Santa.
7 00:00:16,784 00:00:18,195 Only a few billion left to go Only a few billion left to go
8 00:00:18,219 00:00:20,254 on the naughty list spreadsheet on the naughty list spreadsheet
9 00:00:20,288 00:00:22,423 and you're already dozing off again. and you're already dozing off again.
10 00:00:22,456 00:00:23,357 Cut! Cut!
11 00:00:23,391 00:00:25,269 All right, let's go back to one, people! All right, let's go back to one, people!
12 00:00:25,293 00:00:27,461 And try it again, please? And try it again, please?
13 00:00:30,398 00:00:31,398 Action! Action!
14 00:00:31,699 00:00:34,568 (snores and laughs) (snores and laughs)
15 00:00:34,602 00:00:35,736 (coughs) (coughs)
16 00:00:35,769 00:00:37,371 Gees, Santa. Gees, Santa.
17 00:00:37,405 00:00:38,848 Only a few billion left to go Only a few billion left to go
18 00:00:38,872 00:00:40,674 on the naughty list spreadsheet on the naughty list spreadsheet
19 00:00:40,708 00:00:42,643 and you're already dozing off again. and you're already dozing off again.
20 00:00:42,676 00:00:44,412 I gotta check it twice but- I gotta check it twice but-
21 00:00:44,445 00:00:45,146 Cut! Cut!
22 00:00:45,179 00:00:46,080 Nick! Nick!
23 00:00:46,114 00:00:47,415 Great stuff. Great stuff.
24 00:00:47,448 00:00:49,593 The ho's, really fantastic, don't change a thing. The ho's, really fantastic, don't change a thing.
25 00:00:49,617 00:00:51,185 Herman on this next tape, Herman on this next tape,
26 00:00:51,219 00:00:53,197 I want you to think about the children of the world, I want you to think about the children of the world,
27 00:00:53,221 00:00:55,256 walking down, Christmas Day, walking down, Christmas Day,
28 00:00:55,289 00:00:56,724 to find their trees empty to find their trees empty
29 00:00:56,757 00:00:59,693 because you haven't done your job because you haven't done your job
30 00:00:59,727 00:01:01,927 by waking Santa up to check the naughty list! by waking Santa up to check the naughty list!
31 00:01:02,230 00:01:03,831 Herman, god forbid! Herman, god forbid!
32 00:01:03,864 00:01:07,268 A nice kid ends up there by accident! A nice kid ends up there by accident!
33 00:01:07,501 00:01:09,637 Let's try it again, guys! Let's try it again, guys!
34 00:01:09,670 00:01:10,571 All right! All right!
35 00:01:10,604 00:01:11,405 Take it back. Take it back.
36 00:01:11,439 00:01:12,406 This is the martini. This is the martini.
37 00:01:12,440 00:01:13,307 We're gonna finish it up, We're gonna finish it up,
38 00:01:13,341 00:01:14,108 wrap it up, wrap it up,
39 00:01:14,142 00:01:15,576 put a ribbon on it. put a ribbon on it.
40 00:01:16,210 00:01:18,812 Okay, and rolling and Okay, and rolling and
41 00:01:21,149 00:01:22,149 action! action!
42 00:01:22,816 00:01:23,751 Gees, Santa! Gees, Santa!
43 00:01:23,784 00:01:25,319 Only a few billion left to go Only a few billion left to go
44 00:01:25,353 00:01:27,155 on the naughty list spreadsheet on the naughty list spreadsheet
45 00:01:27,188 00:01:28,432 You know, I don't wanna be here. You know, I don't wanna be here.
46 00:01:28,456 00:01:29,557 Do you wanna be here? Do you wanna be here?
47 00:01:29,590 00:01:30,258 I don't know man. I don't know man.
48 00:01:30,291 00:01:31,392 This sucks. This sucks.
49 00:01:31,425 00:01:32,669 I know, it's an energy drink. I know, it's an energy drink.
50 00:01:32,693 00:01:33,737 The only way to make it around the world The only way to make it around the world
51 00:01:33,761 00:01:34,895 is with this! is with this!
52 00:01:34,928 00:01:36,673 The only energy drink with the legal limit The only energy drink with the legal limit
53 00:01:36,697 00:01:38,632 of nitroglycerine! of nitroglycerine!
54 00:01:42,370 00:01:44,705 (chuckles) Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho! (chuckles) Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho!
55 00:01:44,738 00:01:45,839 Rocket Fuel! Rocket Fuel!
56 00:01:45,873 00:01:48,276 The cure for the common suck! The cure for the common suck!
57 00:01:48,476 00:01:49,443 And And
58 00:01:49,477 00:01:49,910 cut! cut!
59 00:01:49,943 00:01:50,744 Herman! Herman!
60 00:01:50,778 00:01:51,845 Nailed it buddy. Nailed it buddy.
61 00:01:51,879 00:01:53,581 Thank you so much. Thank you so much.
62 00:01:53,614 00:01:54,724 I really believe that you are one I really believe that you are one
63 00:01:54,748 00:01:57,151 of Santa's elves and not a midget. of Santa's elves and not a midget.
64 00:01:57,185 00:01:58,328 Please don't call me that. Please don't call me that.
65 00:01:58,352 00:01:59,287 Guys, can we check the gate? Guys, can we check the gate?
66 00:01:59,320 00:02:00,521 Gate's good! Gate's good!
67 00:02:00,554 00:02:01,355 Good gate! Good gate!
68 00:02:01,389 00:02:02,523 That's a wrap, guys. That's a wrap, guys.
69 00:02:02,556 00:02:04,492 Thank you so much, really great stuff. Thank you so much, really great stuff.
70 00:02:05,493 00:02:07,861 (bell ringing) (bell ringing)
71 00:02:08,229 00:02:12,333 ♪ (lyrics) I keep on trying but I come up ♪ (lyrics) I keep on trying but I come up
72 00:02:12,366 00:02:13,601 short short
73 00:02:14,902 00:02:18,306 I need a little help I need a little help
74 00:02:18,872 00:02:22,243 A little support A little support
75 00:02:22,276 00:02:25,579 I can't stop making big plans I can't stop making big plans
76 00:02:25,613 00:02:28,482 I just wanna be the bigger man I just wanna be the bigger man
77 00:02:28,516 00:02:33,654 and I'll be the bigger man and I'll be the bigger man
78 00:02:33,687 00:02:35,656 Don't overlook me Don't overlook me
79 00:02:35,689 00:02:37,591 Don't overlook me Don't overlook me
80 00:02:37,625 00:02:39,860 Don't pass me by Don't pass me by
81 00:02:39,893 00:02:42,430 Don't pass me by Don't pass me by
82 00:02:42,763 00:02:45,633 I'm doing the best I'm doing the best
83 00:02:45,666 00:02:48,236 That I can That I can
84 00:02:48,469 00:02:52,573 Yes, I'll be the bigger man Yes, I'll be the bigger man
85 00:02:53,874 00:03:00,281 I keep on trying but they sell me short I keep on trying but they sell me short
86 00:03:00,314 00:03:03,317 I need a little help I need a little help
87 00:03:03,351 00:03:05,886 A little support A little support
88 00:03:05,919 00:03:09,623 I keep on hoping there's a bigger man I keep on hoping there's a bigger man
89 00:03:09,657 00:03:12,526 I just wanna be the bigger man, yeah I just wanna be the bigger man, yeah
90 00:03:13,427 00:03:16,930 Yeah, I'll be the bigger man Yeah, I'll be the bigger man
91 00:03:16,964 00:03:19,733 I'll be the bigger man (clapping hands) I'll be the bigger man (clapping hands)
92 00:03:19,767 00:03:24,204 Thank God and I'll be the bigger man Thank God and I'll be the bigger man
93 00:03:25,606 00:03:28,676 I'll be the bigger man, hey, hey I'll be the bigger man, hey, hey
94 00:03:29,777 00:03:32,513 I'll be the bigger man I'll be the bigger man
95 00:03:32,546 00:03:34,248 Oh, right now Oh, right now
96 00:03:34,282 00:03:36,450 I'll be the bigger man I'll be the bigger man
97 00:03:36,484 00:03:38,486 I will be the bigger man I will be the bigger man
98 00:03:38,519 00:03:40,754 I'll be the bigger man I'll be the bigger man
99 00:03:40,788 00:03:42,623 Yeah, yeah, yeah Yeah, yeah, yeah
100 00:03:42,656 00:03:46,927 I'll be the bigger man I'll be the bigger man
101 00:03:46,960 00:03:53,867 Yes, I'll be the bigger man ♪ Yes, I'll be the bigger man ♪
102 00:03:53,901 00:03:59,740 (light jazz music) (light jazz music)
103 00:04:05,379 00:04:06,280 Miller! Miller!
104 00:04:06,314 00:04:07,415 Hey, you! Hey, you!
105 00:04:07,448 00:04:08,625 I've got a top order table. I've got a top order table.
106 00:04:08,649 00:04:10,026 Probably displaying I heart New York t-shirts. Probably displaying I heart New York t-shirts.
107 00:04:10,050 00:04:11,419 Oh, do not be afraid Oh, do not be afraid
108 00:04:11,452 00:04:13,020 to add gratuity to their bill. to add gratuity to their bill.
109 00:04:13,053 00:04:15,489 One step ahead of you. One step ahead of you.
110 00:04:15,523 00:04:17,425 So, how's the boyfriend thing? So, how's the boyfriend thing?
111 00:04:17,458 00:04:18,826 Ah, we broke up. Ah, we broke up.
112 00:04:18,859 00:04:19,960 What happened? What happened?
113 00:04:19,993 00:04:21,595 Turns out, he doesn't like me. Turns out, he doesn't like me.
114 00:04:22,430 00:04:24,073 I really thought this one was going somewhere. I really thought this one was going somewhere.
115 00:04:24,097 00:04:26,400 Don't be so hard on yourself. Don't be so hard on yourself.
116 00:04:26,434 00:04:27,735 It's just a few weeks. It's just a few weeks.
117 00:04:27,768 00:04:28,869 Six. Six.
118 00:04:28,902 00:04:30,671 But my first kiss was at my door. But my first kiss was at my door.
119 00:04:30,704 00:04:32,873 Ah, my door. Ah, my door.
120 00:04:32,906 00:04:34,775 I'm used to it being in a bar. I'm used to it being in a bar.
121 00:04:34,808 00:04:36,019 I keep getting into these relationships I keep getting into these relationships
122 00:04:36,043 00:04:37,678 that go absolutely nowhere that go absolutely nowhere
123 00:04:37,711 00:04:39,747 and I should probably just be single and I should probably just be single
124 00:04:39,780 00:04:41,515 for the rest of my life. for the rest of my life.
125 00:04:41,549 00:04:43,092 Hey, so how was your commercial? Hey, so how was your commercial?
126 00:04:43,116 00:04:45,453 Oh, another day of candy cane Spandex. Oh, another day of candy cane Spandex.
127 00:04:45,486 00:04:46,630 It's your third elf shoot this month. It's your third elf shoot this month.
128 00:04:46,654 00:04:49,022 Hey, when your ass looks this good in tights, Hey, when your ass looks this good in tights,
129 00:04:49,056 00:04:50,500 speed dial. (Miller chuckles) speed dial. (Miller chuckles)
130 00:04:50,524 00:04:52,059 How's your audition? How's your audition?
131 00:04:52,092 00:04:53,060 Um, I didn't go. Um, I didn't go.
132 00:04:53,093 00:04:54,227 Miller! Miller!
133 00:04:54,261 00:04:57,498 The role was for me to seduce some Russian thug. The role was for me to seduce some Russian thug.
134 00:04:57,531 00:04:58,766 I am not a seductress. I am not a seductress.
135 00:04:58,799 00:04:59,843 I cannot seduce anything I cannot seduce anything
136 00:04:59,867 00:05:01,569 and I get all nervous and insecure and I get all nervous and insecure
137 00:05:01,602 00:05:02,646 and then my hands are shaking and then my hands are shaking
138 00:05:02,670 00:05:04,372 and I just, I can't deal with it. and I just, I can't deal with it.
139 00:05:04,405 00:05:06,082 Maybe you can play somebody extremely cold. Maybe you can play somebody extremely cold.
140 00:05:06,106 00:05:07,641 (chuckles) (chuckles)
141 00:05:07,675 00:05:09,753 I don't know I think I need an agent or something. I don't know I think I need an agent or something.
142 00:05:09,777 00:05:11,479 I gave you Tyrone's number. I gave you Tyrone's number.
143 00:05:11,512 00:05:13,681 I said an agent, not a pimp. I said an agent, not a pimp.
144 00:05:20,120 00:05:21,522 There you go. There you go.
145 00:05:21,555 00:05:23,023 And now, what can I get you? And now, what can I get you?
146 00:05:23,056 00:05:24,768 I'd like to have a green salad please. I'd like to have a green salad please.
147 00:05:24,792 00:05:27,042 And I'll have the grilled rib-eye, extra well. And I'll have the grilled rib-eye, extra well.
148 00:05:27,928 00:05:29,539 Honey, I thought we were on a budget? Honey, I thought we were on a budget?
149 00:05:29,563 00:05:30,631 We are on a budget. We are on a budget.
150 00:05:30,664 00:05:32,041 Make this a two-income household Make this a two-income household
151 00:05:32,065 00:05:33,367 instead of one-income, instead of one-income,
152 00:05:33,401 00:05:35,636 we would have more budget conversations. we would have more budget conversations.
153 00:05:35,669 00:05:36,913 (scoffs) You're such a hypocrite! (scoffs) You're such a hypocrite!
154 00:05:36,937 00:05:38,081 Say it again and we're gonna yank you Say it again and we're gonna yank you
155 00:05:38,105 00:05:40,717 out of that frou-frou school that taught you that word. out of that frou-frou school that taught you that word.
156 00:05:40,741 00:05:42,443 I'm not afraid of you! I'm not afraid of you!
157 00:05:42,476 00:05:43,744 Yes, you are. Yes, you are.
158 00:05:43,777 00:05:45,579 I'll go put your orders in. I'll go put your orders in.
159 00:05:53,787 00:05:55,656 Hey, Mr. Herman. Hey, Mr. Herman.
160 00:05:55,689 00:05:56,990 Juan, how are you? Juan, how are you?
161 00:05:57,024 00:05:57,858 Fine, thank you. Fine, thank you.
162 00:05:57,891 00:05:59,460 How was your commercial? How was your commercial?
163 00:05:59,493 00:06:01,662 Oh, I'm already tired of talking about it. Oh, I'm already tired of talking about it.
164 00:06:01,695 00:06:02,796 How about you though? How about you though?
165 00:06:02,830 00:06:04,641 Have you seen any movies you can recommend? Have you seen any movies you can recommend?
166 00:06:04,665 00:06:06,467 I went to [film fare] last week I went to [film fare] last week
167 00:06:06,500 00:06:09,737 and I saw a great French one by Truffaut. and I saw a great French one by Truffaut.
168 00:06:09,770 00:06:10,671 You know French? You know French?
169 00:06:10,704 00:06:12,806 I read the subtitles. I read the subtitles.
170 00:06:12,840 00:06:13,907 Subtitles, oh. Subtitles, oh.
171 00:06:13,941 00:06:16,076 That's too much multitasking for me. That's too much multitasking for me.
172 00:06:16,109 00:06:17,478 Hey, Mr. Herman. Hey, Mr. Herman.
173 00:06:17,511 00:06:18,755 If you're not busy, could you please take If you're not busy, could you please take
174 00:06:18,779 00:06:20,548 this up to the bar? this up to the bar?
175 00:06:20,581 00:06:21,682 Sure. Sure.
176 00:06:22,950 00:06:23,917 Thank you, Mr. Herman. Thank you, Mr. Herman.
177 00:06:23,951 00:06:25,686 No problem, my friend. No problem, my friend.
178 00:06:26,487 00:06:27,921 You meet anybody then? You meet anybody then?
179 00:06:27,955 00:06:29,557 Yep. Yep.
180 00:06:29,590 00:06:30,123 Really. Really.
181 00:06:30,157 00:06:30,924 Somebody saw? Somebody saw?
182 00:06:30,958 00:06:32,159 I knew that. I knew that.
183 00:06:33,894 00:06:35,696 Oh, thanks, little man. Oh, thanks, little man.
184 00:06:35,729 00:06:37,431 I was getting pretty low. I was getting pretty low.
185 00:06:37,465 00:06:38,866 Oh, that was funny. Oh, that was funny.
186 00:06:38,899 00:06:40,133 Come on, you get it? Come on, you get it?
187 00:06:40,167 00:06:42,536 Yeah, my name is Herman. Yeah, my name is Herman.
188 00:06:42,570 00:06:43,904 Well, my name is Pete. Well, my name is Pete.
189 00:06:43,937 00:06:45,038 Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you.
190 00:06:45,072 00:06:46,149 Haven't seen you here before. Haven't seen you here before.
191 00:06:46,173 00:06:47,775 You're right, you haven't. You're right, you haven't.
192 00:06:47,808 00:06:48,842 First day. First day.
193 00:06:48,876 00:06:50,811 It's a great place to work. It's a great place to work.
194 00:06:50,844 00:06:52,112 Beats unemployment Beats unemployment
195 00:06:52,145 00:06:54,882 and used to be a producer over at Rachael Ray. and used to be a producer over at Rachael Ray.
196 00:06:54,915 00:06:56,049 Never seen it. Never seen it.
197 00:06:56,083 00:06:57,551 Never seen Rachael Ray? Never seen Rachael Ray?
198 00:06:57,585 00:06:59,520 She's a cultural icon. She's a cultural icon.
199 00:06:59,553 00:07:00,664 I mean who else could say I mean who else could say
200 00:07:00,688 00:07:02,932 that they cook homemade ravioli during an interview that they cook homemade ravioli during an interview
201 00:07:02,956 00:07:04,024 with [Cole Cody]- with [Cole Cody]-
202 00:07:04,057 00:07:05,192 Sorry, dude. Sorry, dude.
203 00:07:05,225 00:07:06,703 If Ryan Seacrest isn't hosting, If Ryan Seacrest isn't hosting,
204 00:07:06,727 00:07:07,961 I'm not watching. I'm not watching.
205 00:07:08,562 00:07:10,230 Seacrest, man. Seacrest, man.
206 00:07:10,263 00:07:12,108 Yeah, well, Rach might be a little high brow Yeah, well, Rach might be a little high brow
207 00:07:12,132 00:07:13,534 for you anyway. for you anyway.
208 00:07:13,567 00:07:14,902 Enjoy your clean glasses. Enjoy your clean glasses.
209 00:07:14,935 00:07:17,070 All right, thanks, little man. All right, thanks, little man.
210 00:07:17,104 00:07:18,739 Whoa, whoa, whoa. Whoa, whoa, whoa.
211 00:07:18,772 00:07:20,216 Little man, come on back here. Little man, come on back here.
212 00:07:20,240 00:07:21,851 Do me a favor and run these things back Do me a favor and run these things back
213 00:07:21,875 00:07:23,753 to the kitchen, there's spots all over them. to the kitchen, there's spots all over them.
214 00:07:23,777 00:07:27,014 First off, I'm not your busboy, First off, I'm not your busboy,
215 00:07:27,047 00:07:30,918 secondly, my mother owns this restaurant, secondly, my mother owns this restaurant,
216 00:07:30,951 00:07:34,154 so you might wanna try remembering my name. so you might wanna try remembering my name.
217 00:07:34,187 00:07:35,699 Wait, your mom owns this restaurant. Wait, your mom owns this restaurant.
218 00:07:35,723 00:07:37,057 Yup. Yup.
219 00:07:37,691 00:07:45,691 [sings in foreign language] [sings in foreign language]
220 00:07:46,967 00:07:48,669 Juan, have you seen Gregg? Juan, have you seen Gregg?
221 00:07:48,702 00:07:51,605 I think he went to the storage room. I think he went to the storage room.
222 00:07:52,673 00:07:53,941 (sobbing) (sobbing)
223 00:07:53,974 00:07:55,108 What are you doing? What are you doing?
224 00:07:55,142 00:07:56,844 Order up. Order up.
225 00:07:57,244 00:07:58,145 Herman Herman
226 00:07:58,178 00:07:59,079 I can't. I can't.
227 00:07:59,112 00:08:00,690 Something terrible has happened. Something terrible has happened.
228 00:08:00,714 00:08:02,158 You can't react this way every time You can't react this way every time
229 00:08:02,182 00:08:04,552 somebody sends a dish back. somebody sends a dish back.
230 00:08:04,585 00:08:07,521 Herman, that happened two times. Herman, that happened two times.
231 00:08:08,556 00:08:10,824 Three maybe. Three maybe.
232 00:08:10,858 00:08:12,125 So, what's wrong? So, what's wrong?
233 00:08:12,159 00:08:14,027 (cries) Herman. (cries) Herman.
234 00:08:15,128 00:08:16,940 Gregg, I don't have time for a guessing game. Gregg, I don't have time for a guessing game.
235 00:08:16,964 00:08:17,965 Come on. Come on.
236 00:08:20,568 00:08:22,002 Mom died. Mom died.
237 00:08:22,035 00:08:29,743 (funeral music) (funeral music)
238 00:08:33,914 00:08:35,949 And where are you going, little man? And where are you going, little man?
239 00:08:35,983 00:08:37,084 It's my mother's wake. It's my mother's wake.
240 00:08:37,117 00:08:39,119 Not until I see some ID. Not until I see some ID.
241 00:08:39,152 00:08:40,053 For what? For what?
242 00:08:40,087 00:08:42,155 For the open bar. For the open bar.
243 00:08:45,593 00:08:47,527 Everybody's up on the roof. Everybody's up on the roof.
244 00:09:00,874 00:09:02,610 Aloha! Aloha!
245 00:09:03,711 00:09:04,612 No thanks. No thanks.
246 00:09:04,645 00:09:06,680 I didn't come here to get laid. I didn't come here to get laid.
247 00:09:08,849 00:09:09,959 [inaudible conversation] [inaudible conversation]
248 00:09:09,983 00:09:15,555 (singing Hawaiian song) (singing Hawaiian song)
249 00:09:21,128 00:09:22,963 Tyrone, who invited you? Tyrone, who invited you?
250 00:09:22,996 00:09:24,331 Ha, ha, Herman! Ha, ha, Herman!
251 00:09:24,364 00:09:25,799 I heard the news. I heard the news.
252 00:09:25,833 00:09:27,076 Sorry about your mama, baby. Sorry about your mama, baby.
253 00:09:27,100 00:09:28,001 Yeah, me too. Yeah, me too.
254 00:09:28,035 00:09:29,136 Well, how'd you do Well, how'd you do
255 00:09:29,169 00:09:29,970 on that Rocket Fuel commercial thing? on that Rocket Fuel commercial thing?
256 00:09:30,003 00:09:31,047 You make us some money. You make us some money.
257 00:09:31,071 00:09:32,215 Your 15%'s in the mail. Your 15%'s in the mail.
258 00:09:32,239 00:09:33,140 Oh really? Oh really?
259 00:09:33,173 00:09:35,776 See, I thought we agreed on 50. See, I thought we agreed on 50.
260 00:09:37,077 00:09:38,822 All right, I'm just messing with you. All right, I'm just messing with you.
261 00:09:38,846 00:09:40,147 Where is the casket? Where is the casket?
262 00:09:40,848 00:09:43,383 I think I saw a floatie over there (chuckles). I think I saw a floatie over there (chuckles).
263 00:09:43,416 00:09:44,994 Hey, I don't know if this is a good time Hey, I don't know if this is a good time
264 00:09:45,018 00:09:45,753 to talk business- to talk business-
265 00:09:45,786 00:09:47,087 It's not. It's not.
266 00:09:47,120 00:09:48,255 All right. All right.
267 00:09:48,288 00:09:49,733 I got you an audition for a made-for-TV I got you an audition for a made-for-TV
268 00:09:49,757 00:09:52,159 Christmas movie, Santa Claus gets arrested Christmas movie, Santa Claus gets arrested
269 00:09:52,192 00:09:54,127 for using child labor when the elves go for using child labor when the elves go
270 00:09:54,161 00:09:55,362 on a union strike. on a union strike.
271 00:09:55,395 00:09:56,840 You're gonna a tiny teamster baby. You're gonna a tiny teamster baby.
272 00:09:56,864 00:09:58,966 A gumdrop Jimmy Hoffa. A gumdrop Jimmy Hoffa.
273 00:09:58,999 00:10:00,200 I'm speechless. I'm speechless.
274 00:10:00,233 00:10:01,068 Hey, come on, Herman. Hey, come on, Herman.
275 00:10:01,101 00:10:02,111 Let me buy you a drink. Let me buy you a drink.
276 00:10:02,135 00:10:02,936 It's on me. It's on me.
277 00:10:02,970 00:10:04,672 I'll pass. I'll pass.
278 00:10:04,705 00:10:12,145 (singing Hawaiian song) (singing Hawaiian song)
279 00:10:12,179 00:10:13,847 Hey, you. Hey, you.
280 00:10:14,114 00:10:15,749 Aww. Aww.
281 00:10:16,684 00:10:18,018 I'm sorry for your loss. I'm sorry for your loss.
282 00:10:18,051 00:10:19,352 How you holding up? How you holding up?
283 00:10:19,386 00:10:21,364 I thought I'd feel really depressed today I thought I'd feel really depressed today
284 00:10:21,388 00:10:24,100 but when I walked in and saw that coconut bikini right here, but when I walked in and saw that coconut bikini right here,
285 00:10:24,124 00:10:25,793 all seems right in the world. all seems right in the world.
286 00:10:25,826 00:10:27,961 The hula girl got confidence. The hula girl got confidence.
287 00:10:27,995 00:10:29,162 Truly. Truly.
288 00:10:29,196 00:10:30,097 I didn't think they'd be celebrating I didn't think they'd be celebrating
289 00:10:30,130 00:10:32,032 your mom's passing like this. your mom's passing like this.
290 00:10:32,065 00:10:34,001 Miller, it's news to me too. Miller, it's news to me too.
291 00:10:34,034 00:10:35,178 It's a really fun party though. It's a really fun party though.
292 00:10:35,202 00:10:35,869 Miller. Miller.
293 00:10:35,903 00:10:36,837 Mm? Mm?
294 00:10:36,870 00:10:37,971 Have you seen Gregg? Have you seen Gregg?
295 00:10:38,005 00:10:40,240 I need to have a few words with him. I need to have a few words with him.
296 00:10:40,273 00:10:41,842 Attention, attention. Attention, attention.
297 00:10:41,875 00:10:44,211 Can I have everybody's attention please? Can I have everybody's attention please?
298 00:10:44,244 00:10:46,379 Hello, my name is Gregg Campieche. Hello, my name is Gregg Campieche.
299 00:10:46,413 00:10:48,081 Camilla is my mother. Camilla is my mother.
300 00:10:48,115 00:10:49,382 I am her youngest son. I am her youngest son.
301 00:10:49,416 00:10:51,018 You know, all our lives, You know, all our lives,
302 00:10:51,051 00:10:53,821 my older brother Herman and I wanted to bring our mother my older brother Herman and I wanted to bring our mother
303 00:10:53,854 00:10:56,990 to the tropical island paradise of Hawaii. to the tropical island paradise of Hawaii.
304 00:10:57,024 00:10:59,893 We wanted to have the wind blow through our hair, We wanted to have the wind blow through our hair,
305 00:10:59,927 00:11:02,162 have the sand in between our toes, have the sand in between our toes,
306 00:11:02,195 00:11:05,999 the sun basting our skin like a butterball turkey (chuckles) the sun basting our skin like a butterball turkey (chuckles)
307 00:11:06,033 00:11:08,836 but that never happened. but that never happened.
308 00:11:08,869 00:11:13,774 So, today, I wanted to bring Waikiki to her. So, today, I wanted to bring Waikiki to her.
309 00:11:13,807 00:11:17,811 (chuckles) And now, I'd like to raise a toast, mm? (chuckles) And now, I'd like to raise a toast, mm?
310 00:11:18,245 00:11:20,714 To a wonderful woman, To a wonderful woman,
311 00:11:20,748 00:11:22,382 a loving mother, a loving mother,
312 00:11:22,415 00:11:24,752 and my best friend, and my best friend,
313 00:11:24,785 00:11:27,721 Camilla Rose Mitchell Campieche. Camilla Rose Mitchell Campieche.
314 00:11:29,122 00:11:30,758 Mm, oh my god. Mm, oh my god.
315 00:11:30,791 00:11:33,727 This is like a party in your mouth everybody. (chuckles) This is like a party in your mouth everybody. (chuckles)
316 00:11:33,761 00:11:34,971 Oh, this is my older brother, Herman. Oh, this is my older brother, Herman.
317 00:11:34,995 00:11:36,205 Herman, do you wanna say a few words? Herman, do you wanna say a few words?
318 00:11:36,229 00:11:37,340 What the hell is wrong with you? What the hell is wrong with you?
319 00:11:37,364 00:11:38,842 Mom never asked for a carnival. Mom never asked for a carnival.
320 00:11:38,866 00:11:39,767 I thought this would be thoughtful. I thought this would be thoughtful.
321 00:11:39,800 00:11:41,334 Why are you trying to ruin it? Why are you trying to ruin it?
322 00:11:41,368 00:11:42,836 Why is mom orange?! Why is mom orange?!
323 00:11:42,870 00:11:45,038 I had the mortician give her a spray tan. I had the mortician give her a spray tan.
324 00:11:45,072 00:11:46,515 I didn't want her to look pasty in her own wake. I didn't want her to look pasty in her own wake.
325 00:11:46,539 00:11:47,374 You're sick! You're sick!
326 00:11:47,407 00:11:48,742 Sick! Sick!
327 00:11:48,776 00:11:50,086 Herman, this was going really well. Herman, this was going really well.
328 00:11:50,110 00:11:51,354 What, are you just jealous What, are you just jealous
329 00:11:51,378 00:11:53,313 because I look like the better son? because I look like the better son?
330 00:11:53,346 00:11:54,958 I'm this close to shoving that palm tree I'm this close to shoving that palm tree
331 00:11:54,982 00:11:58,018 so far up your ass, you'll be coughing up coconut milk! so far up your ass, you'll be coughing up coconut milk!
332 00:11:58,051 00:11:59,462 It's a plastic pineapple tree. It's a plastic pineapple tree.
333 00:11:59,486 00:12:02,055 There is no coconut milk in it. There is no coconut milk in it.
334 00:12:02,555 00:12:04,457 (everyone gasps) (everyone gasps)
335 00:12:04,491 00:12:05,759 You're next! You're next!
336 00:12:05,793 00:12:06,927 Oh, aww! Oh, aww!
337 00:12:06,960 00:12:08,862 Who's got the bets for the little guy! Who's got the bets for the little guy!
338 00:12:08,896 00:12:09,896 Stop it! Stop it!
339 00:12:11,331 00:12:12,833 Enough! Enough!
340 00:12:12,866 00:12:13,867 Enough! Enough!
341 00:12:13,901 00:12:17,137 (everyone talking and screaming) (everyone talking and screaming)
342 00:12:18,005 00:12:18,872 Stop! Stop!
343 00:12:18,906 00:12:19,539 Take this outside! Take this outside!
344 00:12:19,572 00:12:20,974 Gregg, come on! Gregg, come on!
345 00:12:21,008 00:12:23,543 Miller, bring the palm tree! Miller, bring the palm tree!
346 00:12:23,576 00:12:25,946 Ah, nothing like a death Ah, nothing like a death
347 00:12:25,979 00:12:28,381 to cause a family squabble, right? to cause a family squabble, right?
348 00:12:28,415 00:12:29,793 Please everyone have a drink. Please everyone have a drink.
349 00:12:29,817 00:12:31,518 Enjoy yourselves. Enjoy yourselves.
350 00:12:31,551 00:12:33,220 For the love of god, play Pelvis. For the love of god, play Pelvis.
351 00:12:33,253 00:12:34,321 Play! Play!
352 00:12:34,354 00:12:41,895 (lively ukulele music) (lively ukulele music)
353 00:12:41,929 00:12:44,431 [sings in foreign language] [sings in foreign language]
354 00:12:45,899 00:12:47,500 Put me down! Put me down!
355 00:12:49,436 00:12:50,537 Go check yourself Go check yourself
356 00:12:50,570 00:12:51,939 before you wreck yourself. before you wreck yourself.
357 00:12:51,972 00:12:53,316 I'm gonna wreck something all right! I'm gonna wreck something all right!
358 00:12:53,340 00:12:54,041 You! You!
359 00:12:54,074 00:12:55,442 Over here! Over here!
360 00:12:55,475 00:12:57,020 Herman, I don't know why you're so angry. Herman, I don't know why you're so angry.
361 00:12:57,044 00:12:58,011 Seriously- Seriously-
362 00:12:58,045 00:12:59,880 Gentlemen. Gentlemen.
363 00:12:59,913 00:13:01,081 Who are you? Who are you?
364 00:13:01,114 00:13:02,391 I was your mother's attorney. I was your mother's attorney.
365 00:13:02,415 00:13:03,917 You must be Herman. You must be Herman.
366 00:13:03,951 00:13:06,186 Ron [Wilidies Pinky] esquire Ron [Wilidies Pinky] esquire
367 00:13:06,219 00:13:08,521 At Gregg's request, I've come to explain At Gregg's request, I've come to explain
368 00:13:08,555 00:13:10,991 your mother's last will and testament. your mother's last will and testament.
369 00:13:11,024 00:13:12,425 Shall we go inside? Shall we go inside?
370 00:13:12,459 00:13:13,560 You know what, You know what,
371 00:13:13,593 00:13:14,904 we're having some issues upstairs. we're having some issues upstairs.
372 00:13:14,928 00:13:16,105 Why don't we just discuss it here? Why don't we just discuss it here?
373 00:13:16,129 00:13:19,032 On the veranda, here have a seat, Herman. On the veranda, here have a seat, Herman.
374 00:13:19,066 00:13:20,367 I'll stand. I'll stand.
375 00:13:20,400 00:13:22,235 No one wants to deal with No one wants to deal with
376 00:13:22,269 00:13:24,905 legal proceedings, especially legal proceedings, especially
377 00:13:24,938 00:13:28,408 on the sidewalk but so it goes. on the sidewalk but so it goes.
378 00:13:28,441 00:13:30,878 Gregg, I'll start with you. Gregg, I'll start with you.
379 00:13:30,911 00:13:32,512 You and your mother shared You and your mother shared
380 00:13:32,545 00:13:35,482 the same passion for food and hospitality, the same passion for food and hospitality,
381 00:13:35,515 00:13:40,120 so you will inherit the family business. so you will inherit the family business.
382 00:13:40,153 00:13:41,989 Thank you, mom. Thank you, mom.
383 00:13:42,022 00:13:43,256 What else? What else?
384 00:13:43,290 00:13:44,400 The remainder of her personal The remainder of her personal
385 00:13:44,424 00:13:46,393 possessions have been donated possessions have been donated
386 00:13:46,894 00:13:50,463 to the Helping Hands Halfway House in Yonkers. to the Helping Hands Halfway House in Yonkers.
387 00:13:50,497 00:13:52,032 So, I'm left with? So, I'm left with?
388 00:13:52,065 00:13:53,967 The directive. The directive.
389 00:13:54,001 00:13:55,135 The directive. The directive.
390 00:13:55,168 00:13:57,037 Your mother's dying wish Your mother's dying wish
391 00:13:57,070 00:14:01,141 was that you take your acting career more seriously. was that you take your acting career more seriously.
392 00:14:01,174 00:14:04,077 No longer settling via punch line No longer settling via punch line
393 00:14:04,111 00:14:05,879 at the end of some bad joke. at the end of some bad joke.
394 00:14:05,913 00:14:09,582 She wanted nothing more than you be successful She wanted nothing more than you be successful
395 00:14:09,616 00:14:12,452 and know you did it on your own. and know you did it on your own.
396 00:14:12,485 00:14:14,254 No handicaps Herman. No handicaps Herman.
397 00:14:14,287 00:14:15,889 Let me be perfectly clear, Let me be perfectly clear,
398 00:14:15,923 00:14:18,125 Gregg has inherited the thriving business Gregg has inherited the thriving business
399 00:14:18,158 00:14:20,060 and one of the most expensive markets and one of the most expensive markets
400 00:14:20,093 00:14:21,929 in the entire country, in the entire country,
401 00:14:21,962 00:14:23,907 the rest of my mother's state has been given the rest of my mother's state has been given
402 00:14:23,931 00:14:27,200 to some homeless people in Yonkers to some homeless people in Yonkers
403 00:14:27,234 00:14:30,570 and all I'm left with is a worthless dying wish? and all I'm left with is a worthless dying wish?
404 00:14:30,603 00:14:31,671 That's correct That's correct
405 00:14:31,704 00:14:33,573 but you will get a copy. but you will get a copy.
406 00:14:35,242 00:14:37,644 If you ever need to work at my restaurant, If you ever need to work at my restaurant,
407 00:14:37,677 00:14:39,947 you're welcome. you're welcome.
408 00:14:39,980 00:14:42,515 I'm gonna kill you. I'm gonna kill you.
409 00:14:42,549 00:14:44,351 Let's have a drink. Let's have a drink.
410 00:14:44,384 00:14:46,586 Yes, a drink sounds good. Yes, a drink sounds good.
411 00:14:48,721 00:14:54,127 (sad piano music) (sad piano music)
412 00:15:02,970 00:15:04,271 Hey, you! Hey, you!
413 00:15:04,304 00:15:06,073 Hey. Hey.
414 00:15:06,706 00:15:09,376 Pretty shitty day, huh? Pretty shitty day, huh?
415 00:15:09,409 00:15:12,245 Yeah, to say the least. Yeah, to say the least.
416 00:15:12,445 00:15:14,681 I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.
417 00:15:14,714 00:15:17,250 This is the best part. (Tyrone laughing) This is the best part. (Tyrone laughing)
418 00:15:17,284 00:15:18,518 Damn boy! Damn boy!
419 00:15:18,551 00:15:19,686 Check this out. Check this out.
420 00:15:19,719 00:15:21,430 I just got a sweet tweet about a role I just got a sweet tweet about a role
421 00:15:21,454 00:15:22,722 that's perfect for you. that's perfect for you.
422 00:15:22,755 00:15:24,491 I'm talking this is the apex, baby. I'm talking this is the apex, baby.
423 00:15:24,524 00:15:26,293 The pinnacle, the crème de la crème- The pinnacle, the crème de la crème-
424 00:15:26,326 00:15:27,394 Spit it out. Spit it out.
425 00:15:27,427 00:15:29,997 My boy, Marty Scorsese is doing a remake My boy, Marty Scorsese is doing a remake
426 00:15:30,030 00:15:32,532 of the Wizard of Oz and you're gonna be playing, of the Wizard of Oz and you're gonna be playing,
427 00:15:32,565 00:15:35,302 the mayor of Munchkin Land. the mayor of Munchkin Land.
428 00:15:35,568 00:15:38,005 Is Leonardo DiCaprio playing Dorothy? Is Leonardo DiCaprio playing Dorothy?
429 00:15:38,038 00:15:39,048 Come on, Herman baby. Come on, Herman baby.
430 00:15:39,072 00:15:40,007 We gotta roll on this. We gotta roll on this.
431 00:15:40,040 00:15:42,409 The audition is tomorrow. The audition is tomorrow.
432 00:15:42,442 00:15:43,710 Tomorrow's my birthday. Tomorrow's my birthday.
433 00:15:43,743 00:15:45,612 And this is your present. And this is your present.
434 00:15:45,645 00:15:47,414 Look, you got two options. Look, you got two options.
435 00:15:47,447 00:15:49,392 You can sit here and have a little pity party You can sit here and have a little pity party
436 00:15:49,416 00:15:50,683 with ice cream and cake with ice cream and cake
437 00:15:50,717 00:15:53,153 or you can follow the yellow brick road or you can follow the yellow brick road
438 00:15:53,186 00:15:55,355 right on down to fame and fortune. right on down to fame and fortune.
439 00:15:55,388 00:15:56,532 Okay, I don't know what his answer is Okay, I don't know what his answer is
440 00:15:56,556 00:15:58,067 but he's done talking to you right now. but he's done talking to you right now.
441 00:15:58,091 00:15:59,202 Hey, nobody's gonna stop Hey, nobody's gonna stop
442 00:15:59,226 00:16:00,503 Tyrone Valentine from communicating Tyrone Valentine from communicating
443 00:16:00,527 00:16:01,428 with his client. with his client.
444 00:16:01,461 00:16:02,395 Is this guy for real? Is this guy for real?
445 00:16:02,429 00:16:04,297 Live and in living color. Live and in living color.
446 00:16:04,331 00:16:06,299 All right, come buy me some ice cream. All right, come buy me some ice cream.
447 00:16:06,333 00:16:07,134 Sounds good. Sounds good.
448 00:16:07,167 00:16:08,435 Herman, baby. Herman, baby.
449 00:16:08,468 00:16:10,537 Give me a call, all right? Give me a call, all right?
450 00:16:15,508 00:16:18,578 Oh my god, my feet hurts so bad. Oh my god, my feet hurts so bad.
451 00:16:18,611 00:16:20,147 Why are you wearing those? Why are you wearing those?
452 00:16:20,180 00:16:22,182 Because they elongate my leg. Because they elongate my leg.
453 00:16:22,215 00:16:23,683 You're fooling yourself. You're fooling yourself.
454 00:16:23,716 00:16:25,028 Hey, I didn't say anything to you Hey, I didn't say anything to you
455 00:16:25,052 00:16:27,220 when you went to a Pilates class yesterday. when you went to a Pilates class yesterday.
456 00:16:27,254 00:16:29,289 That's cold. That's cold.
457 00:16:29,322 00:16:31,424 Mom left Gregg everything. Mom left Gregg everything.
458 00:16:32,059 00:16:32,759 What? What?
459 00:16:32,792 00:16:34,661 I got a directive. I got a directive.
460 00:16:34,694 00:16:36,029 What does that mean? What does that mean?
461 00:16:36,063 00:16:37,763 A directive to stop wasting my life A directive to stop wasting my life
462 00:16:37,830 00:16:40,400 and finally pursue my acting career. and finally pursue my acting career.
463 00:16:41,501 00:16:43,536 Oh my god, that's great. Oh my god, that's great.
464 00:16:43,570 00:16:45,248 It felt more like a slap in the face. It felt more like a slap in the face.
465 00:16:45,272 00:16:47,440 Or a swift kick in the ass, you know, Or a swift kick in the ass, you know,
466 00:16:47,740 00:16:49,076 in a good way. in a good way.
467 00:16:49,109 00:16:50,253 I mean do I need that though? I mean do I need that though?
468 00:16:50,277 00:16:52,512 I mean I get that on a daily basis. I mean I get that on a daily basis.
469 00:16:53,413 00:16:54,490 I know, I think Herman, I know, I think Herman,
470 00:16:54,514 00:16:55,624 this is exactly what you need this is exactly what you need
471 00:16:55,648 00:16:57,750 to stop playing it safe, you know? to stop playing it safe, you know?
472 00:16:57,784 00:17:01,088 I can't help that I'm constantly offered small roles, I can't help that I'm constantly offered small roles,
473 00:17:01,554 00:17:02,789 pun intended. pun intended.
474 00:17:02,822 00:17:04,091 Are you gonna audition Are you gonna audition
475 00:17:04,124 00:17:05,525 to be a Munchkin tomorrow? to be a Munchkin tomorrow?
476 00:17:05,558 00:17:06,735 Oh, not just a Munchkin, Oh, not just a Munchkin,
477 00:17:06,759 00:17:08,228 mayor of Munchkin Land. mayor of Munchkin Land.
478 00:17:08,261 00:17:10,173 I mean there is a hierarchy that deserves I mean there is a hierarchy that deserves
479 00:17:10,197 00:17:11,240 to be recognized here. to be recognized here.
480 00:17:11,264 00:17:12,165 Well, I think you should go Well, I think you should go
481 00:17:12,199 00:17:13,442 for something bigger than that. for something bigger than that.
482 00:17:13,466 00:17:14,767 Like I Like I
483 00:17:15,568 00:17:17,380 think there's lots of roles in the Wizard of Oz think there's lots of roles in the Wizard of Oz
484 00:17:17,404 00:17:20,340 and that you could be the Lion. and that you could be the Lion.
485 00:17:21,708 00:17:23,276 That's unbelievable. That's unbelievable.
486 00:17:23,310 00:17:24,587 Why can't the Lion be little? Why can't the Lion be little?
487 00:17:24,611 00:17:26,179 A little lion with no courage, A little lion with no courage,
488 00:17:26,213 00:17:28,081 takes away the irony of the character, takes away the irony of the character,
489 00:17:28,115 00:17:29,282 that's why. that's why.
490 00:17:29,316 00:17:31,194 And they're not gonna make a short, scarecrow And they're not gonna make a short, scarecrow
491 00:17:31,218 00:17:33,586 with the intention of keeping away birds. with the intention of keeping away birds.
492 00:17:34,121 00:17:35,388 Okay, well, Okay, well,
493 00:17:35,422 00:17:37,257 you could be the Tin Man. you could be the Tin Man.
494 00:17:37,290 00:17:39,192 He's just a dude looking for a heart. He's just a dude looking for a heart.
495 00:17:39,226 00:17:40,793 That's perfect for you. That's perfect for you.
496 00:17:40,827 00:17:43,196 You look fat in that dress. You look fat in that dress.
497 00:17:46,499 00:17:48,635 I think you'd make an adorable Tin Man. I think you'd make an adorable Tin Man.
498 00:17:49,369 00:17:51,247 You think I would make an adorable everything. You think I would make an adorable everything.
499 00:17:51,271 00:17:54,174 (Miller laughs) Is anyone else gonna buy it? (Miller laughs) Is anyone else gonna buy it?
500 00:17:54,207 00:17:55,408 I don't know I don't know
501 00:17:55,875 00:17:58,145 but you won't either until you try. but you won't either until you try.
502 00:18:00,613 00:18:03,250 I look great in this dress. I look great in this dress.
503 00:18:03,283 00:18:05,752 Thank you for walking me home Thank you for walking me home
504 00:18:05,785 00:18:07,854 and the ice cream. and the ice cream.
505 00:18:07,887 00:18:09,189 Any time. Any time.
506 00:18:09,222 00:18:10,690 High five. High five.
507 00:18:10,723 00:18:12,459 Smart ass. Smart ass.
508 00:18:12,492 00:18:13,393 (giggles) Goodnight. (giggles) Goodnight.
509 00:18:13,426 00:18:14,627 Goodnight. Goodnight.
510 00:18:16,763 00:18:17,597 Herman! Herman!
511 00:18:17,630 00:18:18,765 Yeah? Yeah?
512 00:18:20,767 00:18:22,735 You should listen to your mother. You should listen to your mother.
513 00:18:22,769 00:18:25,638 You're good enough to be a leading man. You're good enough to be a leading man.
514 00:18:25,672 00:18:27,207 I'll audition for the tin man I'll audition for the tin man
515 00:18:27,240 00:18:29,309 if you come with me tomorrow. if you come with me tomorrow.
516 00:18:29,876 00:18:31,478 It's a date. It's a date.
517 00:18:31,511 00:18:33,713 And who knows, maybe I'll read for Dorothy. And who knows, maybe I'll read for Dorothy.
518 00:18:33,746 00:18:35,448 Dorothy with hypothermia? Dorothy with hypothermia?
519 00:18:35,482 00:18:37,850 Goodnight! (Herman laughs) Goodnight! (Herman laughs)
520 00:18:40,687 00:18:46,493 (light music) (light music)
521 00:19:03,643 00:19:04,911 Excuse me. Excuse me.
522 00:19:04,944 00:19:06,855 Could you help me reach something please? Could you help me reach something please?
523 00:19:06,879 00:19:07,647 Sure, honeybun. Sure, honeybun.
524 00:19:07,680 00:19:09,716 What would you like? What would you like?
525 00:19:09,749 00:19:12,385 Um, that beer right there on the top shelf. Um, that beer right there on the top shelf.
526 00:19:12,419 00:19:14,287 Oh, beer (laughs). Oh, beer (laughs).
527 00:19:14,321 00:19:15,522 You know, You know,
528 00:19:15,555 00:19:18,491 the Babylonians, they were the first brewers. the Babylonians, they were the first brewers.
529 00:19:18,525 00:19:21,294 They took their beer brewing so seriously. They took their beer brewing so seriously.
530 00:19:21,328 00:19:22,971 Do you know what would happen if you mess up Do you know what would happen if you mess up
531 00:19:22,995 00:19:24,597 a batch of beer? a batch of beer?
532 00:19:24,631 00:19:27,334 They would drown you in it. (laughs) They would drown you in it. (laughs)
533 00:19:27,900 00:19:29,269 Oh. Oh.
534 00:19:29,302 00:19:31,438 Um, yeah, could you just pass me the Um, yeah, could you just pass me the
535 00:19:31,471 00:19:33,240 the Brooklyn IPA? the Brooklyn IPA?
536 00:19:33,273 00:19:35,575 You betcha (giggles). You betcha (giggles).
537 00:19:35,608 00:19:36,776 There you go. There you go.
538 00:19:37,577 00:19:38,845 So much thank you. So much thank you.
539 00:19:38,878 00:19:41,281 You are so welcome. You are so welcome.
540 00:19:41,314 00:19:42,215 Thanks very- Thanks very-
541 00:19:42,249 00:19:42,849 Yeah, I get that too Yeah, I get that too
542 00:19:42,882 00:19:44,484 when I get drunk. when I get drunk.
543 00:19:44,517 00:19:46,219 Have you ever been drunk before? Have you ever been drunk before?
544 00:19:46,253 00:19:47,387 Once or twice. Once or twice.
545 00:19:47,420 00:19:48,564 I think it's so much more fun I think it's so much more fun
546 00:19:48,588 00:19:50,799 to get drunk with people than [cats]. (both laughs) to get drunk with people than [cats]. (both laughs)
547 00:19:50,823 00:19:51,724 Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah.
548 00:19:51,758 00:19:52,859 You know the Vikings, You know the Vikings,
549 00:19:52,892 00:19:54,737 they believe that there was a giant goat they believe that there was a giant goat
550 00:19:54,761 00:19:57,630 whose tits were filled with beer whose tits were filled with beer
551 00:19:57,664 00:19:59,599 that would wait for them in heaven. that would wait for them in heaven.
552 00:19:59,632 00:20:00,867 Hmm. Hmm.
553 00:20:00,900 00:20:03,270 Do you believe in heaven, little guy? Do you believe in heaven, little guy?
554 00:20:03,303 00:20:05,438 Okay, goodnight. Okay, goodnight.
555 00:20:53,453 00:20:55,955 You must've sent this before you died. You must've sent this before you died.
556 00:21:03,029 00:21:05,765 Another dollar older. Another dollar older.
557 00:21:07,600 00:21:09,902 Didn't get it all, Gregg. Didn't get it all, Gregg.
558 00:21:09,936 00:21:12,305 Didn't get it all. Didn't get it all.
559 00:21:26,619 00:21:33,460 (television playing) (television playing)
560 00:21:41,668 00:21:43,069 Next! Next!
561 00:21:45,538 00:21:47,474 Herman, what's up? Herman, what's up?
562 00:21:47,507 00:21:48,841 Not much, Cliff. Not much, Cliff.
563 00:21:48,875 00:21:50,653 I heard you got the Rocket Fuel commercial. I heard you got the Rocket Fuel commercial.
564 00:21:50,677 00:21:51,644 I did. I did.
565 00:21:51,678 00:21:53,680 I would die for that job. I would die for that job.
566 00:21:54,681 00:21:56,483 So, what else is new? So, what else is new?
567 00:21:56,516 00:21:58,518 My mother just died. My mother just died.
568 00:21:58,551 00:22:00,019 Oh, man! Oh, man!
569 00:22:00,052 00:22:01,020 Hey, Miller! Hey, Miller!
570 00:22:01,053 00:22:02,489 Um, do you mind if she Um, do you mind if she
571 00:22:02,522 00:22:04,657 Oh, yeah, sure. Oh, yeah, sure.
572 00:22:05,925 00:22:08,060 Happy birthday! Happy birthday!
573 00:22:08,094 00:22:09,705 Welcome to Munchkin Land. (Miller giggles) Welcome to Munchkin Land. (Miller giggles)
574 00:22:09,729 00:22:11,740 For future reference, this is what it's like For future reference, this is what it's like
575 00:22:11,764 00:22:13,900 to wait for an audition. to wait for an audition.
576 00:22:13,933 00:22:15,735 Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
577 00:22:15,902 00:22:18,505 Oh, I'm so nervous and I'm not even auditioning. Oh, I'm so nervous and I'm not even auditioning.
578 00:22:18,538 00:22:21,374 (laughs) My hands are shaking. (laughs) My hands are shaking.
579 00:22:21,408 00:22:21,908 Look! Look!
580 00:22:21,941 00:22:24,010 That is no joke. That is no joke.
581 00:22:24,043 00:22:25,912 Are you nervous? Are you nervous?
582 00:22:25,945 00:22:27,089 Apparently, you haven't learned the secret Apparently, you haven't learned the secret
583 00:22:27,113 00:22:29,649 of mastering anxiety. of mastering anxiety.
584 00:22:29,682 00:22:30,893 Just a little swig of liquid courage, Just a little swig of liquid courage,
585 00:22:30,917 00:22:32,685 always seems to do the trick. always seems to do the trick.
586 00:22:32,719 00:22:34,487 I see become an alcoholic. I see become an alcoholic.
587 00:22:34,521 00:22:36,689 No, thank you. (both laughing) No, thank you. (both laughing)
588 00:22:37,690 00:22:38,391 Hi! Hi!
589 00:22:38,425 00:22:39,025 Oh, hi! Oh, hi!
590 00:22:39,058 00:22:39,892 I'm Cliff. I'm Cliff.
591 00:22:39,926 00:22:41,027 Hey, Miller. Hey, Miller.
592 00:22:41,060 00:22:42,028 Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you.
593 00:22:42,061 00:22:43,496 Likewise. Likewise.
594 00:22:43,530 00:22:47,667 So, you two um, together? So, you two um, together?
595 00:22:49,035 00:22:50,637 What? What?
596 00:22:50,670 00:22:52,505 What do you mean, Cliff? What do you mean, Cliff?
597 00:22:52,539 00:22:55,908 Are you bf/gf? Are you bf/gf?
598 00:22:56,809 00:22:59,011 Boyfriend, girlfriend? Boyfriend, girlfriend?
599 00:22:59,045 00:23:01,047 Ah, we're just friends. Ah, we're just friends.
600 00:23:01,080 00:23:04,016 Oh, so you're single. Oh, so you're single.
601 00:23:04,951 00:23:08,655 Oh, Cliff, Cliff, Cliff. Oh, Cliff, Cliff, Cliff.
602 00:23:08,688 00:23:10,523 I wish you wouldn't have brought up, I wish you wouldn't have brought up,
603 00:23:11,591 00:23:13,526 the bf/gf with Herman and I the bf/gf with Herman and I
604 00:23:13,560 00:23:17,464 because I was going to have a conversation because I was going to have a conversation
605 00:23:17,497 00:23:18,974 about raising the level of our relationship about raising the level of our relationship
606 00:23:18,998 00:23:20,509 right after your audition, Herman. right after your audition, Herman.
607 00:23:20,533 00:23:22,177 And now, look what you've done, you, And now, look what you've done, you,
608 00:23:22,201 00:23:24,036 cat's out of the bag. cat's out of the bag.
609 00:23:24,604 00:23:27,540 I knew you were hot for me. I knew you were hot for me.
610 00:23:28,174 00:23:29,542 Herman, you're next. Herman, you're next.
611 00:23:29,576 00:23:30,877 Oh, thanks. Oh, thanks.
612 00:23:32,812 00:23:34,447 I'll return, my sweet. I'll return, my sweet.
613 00:23:34,481 00:23:35,748 I'll be waiting. I'll be waiting.
614 00:23:35,782 00:23:37,917 High five, go get 'em! High five, go get 'em!
615 00:23:42,689 00:23:45,525 Hi, my friends say I got a big mouth. Hi, my friends say I got a big mouth.
616 00:23:45,558 00:23:47,827 The damage is done, Cliff. The damage is done, Cliff.
617 00:23:47,860 00:23:49,462 Back it up. Back it up.
618 00:23:53,733 00:23:55,077 Okay, so, we're going to have you Okay, so, we're going to have you
619 00:23:55,101 00:23:56,211 say your name to the camera say your name to the camera
620 00:23:56,235 00:23:58,471 and then you can take it from there. and then you can take it from there.
621 00:23:58,505 00:23:59,772 Before we get started, Before we get started,
622 00:23:59,806 00:24:01,817 I was wondering, are there any other roles I was wondering, are there any other roles
623 00:24:01,841 00:24:03,576 that I could audition for that I could audition for
624 00:24:03,610 00:24:05,778 besides mayor of Munchkin Land? besides mayor of Munchkin Land?
625 00:24:05,812 00:24:07,089 We're also considering you We're also considering you
626 00:24:07,113 00:24:08,915 for Munchkin violinist number two for Munchkin violinist number two
627 00:24:08,948 00:24:12,752 and for the Munchkin treasurer of the Lollipop Guild. and for the Munchkin treasurer of the Lollipop Guild.
628 00:24:13,085 00:24:14,554 Let me rephrase that, Let me rephrase that,
629 00:24:14,587 00:24:15,864 are there any other rules available are there any other rules available
630 00:24:15,888 00:24:18,457 without the word, Munchkin? without the word, Munchkin?
631 00:24:18,925 00:24:20,560 Well, you can read for one Well, you can read for one
632 00:24:20,593 00:24:22,962 of the winged monkeys. of the winged monkeys.
633 00:24:22,995 00:24:25,164 Actually, I was hoping to get a chance Actually, I was hoping to get a chance
634 00:24:25,197 00:24:27,967 to read for the Tin Man. to read for the Tin Man.
635 00:24:30,637 00:24:34,140 Sorry, you're not the right shape. Sorry, you're not the right shape.
636 00:24:34,941 00:24:36,008 With all due respect, With all due respect,
637 00:24:36,042 00:24:38,110 he's just a guy looking for a heart. he's just a guy looking for a heart.
638 00:24:38,144 00:24:39,187 Look, you know what, there are a lot Look, you know what, there are a lot
639 00:24:39,211 00:24:40,680 of people waiting outside, of people waiting outside,
640 00:24:40,713 00:24:42,124 do you wanna audition or not? do you wanna audition or not?
641 00:24:42,148 00:24:44,059 I just wanna know why I have to be typecast, I just wanna know why I have to be typecast,
642 00:24:44,083 00:24:44,984 I, I- I, I-
643 00:24:45,017 00:24:46,686 Next! Next!
644 00:24:47,153 00:24:49,221 I'm not leaving until I get a shot. I'm not leaving until I get a shot.
645 00:24:49,255 00:24:50,790 Get him out my sight. Get him out my sight.
646 00:24:50,823 00:24:52,091 I just want 30 seconds. I just want 30 seconds.
647 00:24:52,124 00:24:53,602 30 seconds, I could read for the Tin Man, 30 seconds, I could read for the Tin Man,
648 00:24:53,626 00:24:55,070 I think you'd be really happy with it. I think you'd be really happy with it.
649 00:24:55,094 00:24:56,204 You have 30 seconds to go. You have 30 seconds to go.
650 00:24:56,228 00:24:57,096 No, I would really like to read- No, I would really like to read-
651 00:24:57,129 00:24:58,565 Come on, I just want- Come on, I just want-
652 00:24:58,598 00:24:59,942 No, I'm thinking in 30 seconds, No, I'm thinking in 30 seconds,
653 00:24:59,966 00:25:01,176 I could really show you something, I could really show you something,
654 00:25:01,200 00:25:03,603 I just want another chance! I just want another chance!
655 00:25:04,837 00:25:05,705 You nailed it? You nailed it?
656 00:25:05,738 00:25:06,873 This was a bad idea. This was a bad idea.
657 00:25:06,906 00:25:08,584 Hollywood's not gonna change overnight, Herman. Hollywood's not gonna change overnight, Herman.
658 00:25:08,608 00:25:09,876 That's for sure. That's for sure.
659 00:25:09,909 00:25:10,977 (sighs) (sighs)
660 00:25:14,246 00:25:18,685 (people laughing and talking) (people laughing and talking)
661 00:25:22,622 00:25:23,956 Hello, what may I get Hello, what may I get
662 00:25:23,990 00:25:25,224 for the two of you? for the two of you?
663 00:25:25,257 00:25:26,726 Nothing but a bottle of red, Nothing but a bottle of red,
664 00:25:26,759 00:25:28,194 something full-bodied, something full-bodied,
665 00:25:28,227 00:25:29,829 a generous of amount of fruit, a generous of amount of fruit,
666 00:25:29,862 00:25:31,206 well integrated [tannin] scent well integrated [tannin] scent
667 00:25:31,230 00:25:33,633 and orgasmic finish. and orgasmic finish.
668 00:25:33,666 00:25:36,235 What's your price range, sir? What's your price range, sir?
669 00:25:37,604 00:25:39,706 Don't insult me. Don't insult me.
670 00:25:41,007 00:25:43,242 I've got just the wine for the two of you. I've got just the wine for the two of you.
671 00:25:43,275 00:25:46,278 (chuckles) Okay, we'll see. (chuckles) Okay, we'll see.
672 00:25:47,013 00:25:49,716 Yeah, that chick's smoking man. Yeah, that chick's smoking man.
673 00:25:49,749 00:25:51,326 Pete, I need a bottle of Barbaresco. Pete, I need a bottle of Barbaresco.
674 00:25:51,350 00:25:52,351 Barbaresco. Barbaresco.
675 00:25:52,384 00:25:53,753 Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
676 00:25:53,786 00:25:54,587 I'll get it for you if you can tell me I'll get it for you if you can tell me
677 00:25:54,621 00:25:55,822 the color of her tong. the color of her tong.
678 00:25:55,855 00:25:56,965 You know it, don't you? You know it, don't you?
679 00:25:56,989 00:25:58,257 You dog, you! You dog, you!
680 00:25:58,290 00:26:00,660 Sorry, she's sworn me to secrecy. Sorry, she's sworn me to secrecy.
681 00:26:01,027 00:26:02,929 Oh, you. Oh, you.
682 00:26:05,965 00:26:07,934 Seriously, dude, if I was your height, Seriously, dude, if I was your height,
683 00:26:07,967 00:26:10,937 I'd use it to my full advantage. I'd use it to my full advantage.
684 00:26:10,970 00:26:12,605 You know what I'm saying right? You know what I'm saying right?
685 00:26:12,639 00:26:14,807 I hope you don't charge for your advice. I hope you don't charge for your advice.
686 00:26:14,841 00:26:17,143 Hey, for you little man, Hey, for you little man,
687 00:26:17,176 00:26:18,978 it's on the house. it's on the house.
688 00:26:20,780 00:26:22,649 Go get 'em buddy. Go get 'em buddy.
689 00:26:23,783 00:26:25,918 It's red, isn't it? It's red, isn't it?
690 00:26:25,952 00:26:26,886 So, my investment broker says, So, my investment broker says,
691 00:26:26,919 00:26:28,731 "Congratulations, your portfolios increased "Congratulations, your portfolios increased
692 00:26:28,755 00:26:31,223 "by 25%." and I said, "Good luck finding "by 25%." and I said, "Good luck finding
693 00:26:31,257 00:26:34,193 "a new job, asswipe" (laughs). "a new job, asswipe" (laughs).
694 00:26:34,226 00:26:36,162 Here you are. Here you are.
695 00:26:36,195 00:26:38,865 Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah.
696 00:27:08,394 00:27:09,295 What? What?
697 00:27:09,328 00:27:12,031 Couldn't reach the top shelf? Couldn't reach the top shelf?
698 00:27:13,199 00:27:16,969 Sir, it must be truly hard to savor a fine wine Sir, it must be truly hard to savor a fine wine
699 00:27:17,003 00:27:19,706 when you're so full of shit! when you're so full of shit!
700 00:27:20,306 00:27:21,817 I demand to speak to your manager, I demand to speak to your manager,
701 00:27:21,841 00:27:25,011 I will not be talked down to by a midget. I will not be talked down to by a midget.
702 00:27:33,853 00:27:34,987 Shit! Shit!
703 00:27:35,021 00:27:37,456 Maybe he'll bring back the other six dwarfs. Maybe he'll bring back the other six dwarfs.
704 00:27:37,489 00:27:39,091 That was a Snow White reference, That was a Snow White reference,
705 00:27:39,125 00:27:41,027 do you know that movie? do you know that movie?
706 00:27:41,060 00:27:42,962 ♪ (lyrics) Oh, making some [poblano] ♪ (lyrics) Oh, making some [poblano]
707 00:27:42,995 00:27:46,365 Oh, you'll just have to wait for my [poblano] Oh, you'll just have to wait for my [poblano]
708 00:27:46,398 00:27:47,967 Um, oh my [poblano] Um, oh my [poblano]
709 00:27:48,000 00:27:51,237 and my [poblano] oh, oh. and my [poblano] oh, oh.
710 00:27:52,038 00:27:53,172 Okay. Okay.
711 00:27:54,741 00:27:58,310 What's going on Mr. Herman man? ♪ What's going on Mr. Herman man? ♪
712 00:28:01,347 00:28:04,116 Hey, why are you running into the storeroom? Hey, why are you running into the storeroom?
713 00:28:04,150 00:28:06,185 Was it my singing? Was it my singing?
714 00:28:06,218 00:28:07,386 Nothing. Nothing.
715 00:28:07,419 00:28:08,755 It's been It's been
716 00:28:08,788 00:28:10,857 I needed some space, it's been a long day. I needed some space, it's been a long day.
717 00:28:12,892 00:28:15,194 Okay, something happened? Okay, something happened?
718 00:28:15,227 00:28:16,462 No, I'm fine. No, I'm fine.
719 00:28:16,495 00:28:18,697 Nothing happened. Nothing happened.
720 00:28:19,531 00:28:20,432 All right. All right.
721 00:28:20,466 00:28:23,002 Well, if you need me, Well, if you need me,
722 00:28:23,302 00:28:26,238 I'll be slinging hash. (chuckles) I'll be slinging hash. (chuckles)
723 00:28:26,272 00:28:27,974 Hey, what's going on? Hey, what's going on?
724 00:28:28,007 00:28:30,209 Oh, Herman needs some space. Oh, Herman needs some space.
725 00:28:30,242 00:28:31,177 Why? Why?
726 00:28:31,210 00:28:32,420 Because that douche bag at table 12 called you Because that douche bag at table 12 called you
727 00:28:32,444 00:28:33,846 the "M" word? the "M" word?
728 00:28:33,880 00:28:35,247 What? What?
729 00:28:35,782 00:28:37,083 Oh, hell no. Oh, hell no.
730 00:28:42,989 00:28:44,390 Herman? Herman?
731 00:28:45,191 00:28:46,893 Come on, don't let it get to you. Come on, don't let it get to you.
732 00:28:46,926 00:28:48,995 Every day, every day Miller. Every day, every day Miller.
733 00:28:49,028 00:28:50,129 No, it's stupid. No, it's stupid.
734 00:28:50,162 00:28:50,963 They're stupid. They're stupid.
735 00:28:50,997 00:28:51,964 They don't know better. They don't know better.
736 00:28:51,998 00:28:53,541 Don't let them get you down on your birthday. Don't let them get you down on your birthday.
737 00:28:53,565 00:28:55,267 Screw my birthday. Screw my birthday.
738 00:28:55,301 00:28:56,836 36. 36.
739 00:28:57,269 00:28:59,371 What do I have to show for it? What do I have to show for it?
740 00:28:59,405 00:29:01,507 I'm working in this place. I'm working in this place.
741 00:29:01,540 00:29:03,075 No matter how hard you try, No matter how hard you try,
742 00:29:03,109 00:29:04,352 no matter how much you push, no matter how much you push,
743 00:29:04,376 00:29:06,245 it doesn't matter. it doesn't matter.
744 00:29:07,880 00:29:09,081 Look at me. Look at me.
745 00:29:09,115 00:29:11,183 What do you see? What do you see?
746 00:29:11,217 00:29:13,085 I see my friend. I see my friend.
747 00:29:13,119 00:29:14,553 I see a freak. I see a freak.
748 00:29:14,586 00:29:16,789 Everybody else sees a freak, Miller. Everybody else sees a freak, Miller.
749 00:29:16,823 00:29:18,257 No, no. No, no.
750 00:29:18,290 00:29:19,058 They just- They just-
751 00:29:19,091 00:29:20,226 I'm a freak! I'm a freak!
752 00:29:20,259 00:29:21,336 Okay, Herman, you are not a freak Okay, Herman, you are not a freak
753 00:29:21,360 00:29:22,328 and I will not let my friend talk and I will not let my friend talk
754 00:29:22,361 00:29:24,196 about himself that way anymore. about himself that way anymore.
755 00:29:24,230 00:29:25,407 You've got to stop paying attention You've got to stop paying attention
756 00:29:25,431 00:29:27,934 to everybody else and focus on what's good to everybody else and focus on what's good
757 00:29:27,967 00:29:29,068 In your life. In your life.
758 00:29:29,101 00:29:32,038 You are paying attention to the wrong things Herman. You are paying attention to the wrong things Herman.
759 00:29:32,071 00:29:33,172 How do I stop? How do I stop?
760 00:29:33,205 00:29:35,283 How do I stop when it's down my throat every second? How do I stop when it's down my throat every second?
761 00:29:35,307 00:29:36,275 People are gonna stare at you. People are gonna stare at you.
762 00:29:36,308 00:29:37,385 People are gonna call you names. People are gonna call you names.
763 00:29:37,409 00:29:38,520 People are gonna do things to you. People are gonna do things to you.
764 00:29:38,544 00:29:39,888 Little kids are gonna poke at you Little kids are gonna poke at you
765 00:29:39,912 00:29:41,489 and be like, "What's wrong with that guy?" and be like, "What's wrong with that guy?"
766 00:29:41,513 00:29:43,082 That is your lot in life. That is your lot in life.
767 00:29:43,115 00:29:45,852 You have to ignore all the bullshit. You have to ignore all the bullshit.
768 00:29:45,885 00:29:49,188 Like just ignore the bullshit and focus on you. Like just ignore the bullshit and focus on you.
769 00:29:53,425 00:29:54,426 Yeah. Yeah.
770 00:29:54,460 00:29:56,128 Every day Herman. Every day Herman.
771 00:29:56,162 00:29:58,364 Every day, I will help you. Every day, I will help you.
772 00:30:01,433 00:30:02,568 Okay. Okay.
773 00:30:03,035 00:30:04,179 Does my makeup look like shit Does my makeup look like shit
774 00:30:04,203 00:30:05,537 or am I fine? or am I fine?
775 00:30:05,571 00:30:06,605 Miller. Miller.
776 00:30:06,638 00:30:07,439 What? What?
777 00:30:07,473 00:30:08,473 You look great. You look great.
778 00:30:09,508 00:30:10,508 Okay. Okay.
779 00:30:11,577 00:30:14,446 I'm gonna go back to my tables. I'm gonna go back to my tables.
780 00:30:14,914 00:30:16,015 Thank you Miller. Thank you Miller.
781 00:30:16,048 00:30:17,449 High fives? High fives?
782 00:30:18,885 00:30:20,152 You're such a smart ass. You're such a smart ass.
783 00:30:20,186 00:30:21,888 (Miller laughs) (Miller laughs)
784 00:30:29,595 00:30:30,897 Oh, you're cold? Oh, you're cold?
785 00:30:30,930 00:30:32,899 Yeah, of course you can wear my jacket Yeah, of course you can wear my jacket
786 00:30:32,932 00:30:36,135 but I'm just gonna be peeling it off you later. but I'm just gonna be peeling it off you later.
787 00:30:36,302 00:30:38,370 I'm talking about porking. I'm talking about porking.
788 00:30:40,572 00:30:42,150 Hello, my name is Gregg Campieche. Hello, my name is Gregg Campieche.
789 00:30:42,174 00:30:43,551 Is there something I can help you with? Is there something I can help you with?
790 00:30:43,575 00:30:45,544 Yes, I don't care that you Yes, I don't care that you
791 00:30:45,577 00:30:47,079 employ handicapped people employ handicapped people
792 00:30:47,113 00:30:49,581 but I don't tolerate bad service. but I don't tolerate bad service.
793 00:30:50,182 00:30:54,053 And I'm not paying for this bottle of wine. And I'm not paying for this bottle of wine.
794 00:30:54,453 00:30:56,488 Is there something wrong with the wine? Is there something wrong with the wine?
795 00:30:56,522 00:30:59,158 I lived in Piamonte for three years. I lived in Piamonte for three years.
796 00:30:59,191 00:31:00,402 Plucked Nebbiolos from the vine. Plucked Nebbiolos from the vine.
797 00:31:00,426 00:31:02,437 I know what this is supposed to taste like I know what this is supposed to taste like
798 00:31:02,461 00:31:06,132 and serving me a 2004 bottle of Barbaresco and serving me a 2004 bottle of Barbaresco
799 00:31:06,165 00:31:09,168 is like asking Beethoven to sit down is like asking Beethoven to sit down
800 00:31:09,201 00:31:12,905 at the Steinway and play Chopsticks. at the Steinway and play Chopsticks.
801 00:31:13,339 00:31:15,975 You are a classy individual and I apologize You are a classy individual and I apologize
802 00:31:16,008 00:31:18,010 for anything you may have experienced. for anything you may have experienced.
803 00:31:18,044 00:31:20,446 There's something, hmm. There's something, hmm.
804 00:31:20,579 00:31:22,048 Oh, wow. Oh, wow.
805 00:31:26,352 00:31:30,656 Mm, mm-hmm. Mm, mm-hmm.
806 00:31:35,494 00:31:39,999 Listen here, your vulgar behavior made me do this. Listen here, your vulgar behavior made me do this.
807 00:31:40,032 00:31:43,669 Now, take your bushy nipple dick out of here, Now, take your bushy nipple dick out of here,
808 00:31:43,702 00:31:45,904 you asshole. you asshole.
809 00:31:54,280 00:31:56,382 (phone ringing) (phone ringing)
810 00:32:03,222 00:32:04,423 What Tyrone?! What Tyrone?!
811 00:32:04,456 00:32:06,292 What kind of shit is you smoking? What kind of shit is you smoking?
812 00:32:06,325 00:32:08,036 I just got a call from my casting peeps I just got a call from my casting peeps
813 00:32:08,060 00:32:09,437 and they said they had to throw you out and they said they had to throw you out
814 00:32:09,461 00:32:10,662 of an audition. of an audition.
815 00:32:10,696 00:32:12,507 You're trying to get us both blacklisted? You're trying to get us both blacklisted?
816 00:32:12,531 00:32:13,741 Did you hear how they treated me? Did you hear how they treated me?
817 00:32:13,765 00:32:16,035 Herman, this is show business. Herman, this is show business.
818 00:32:16,068 00:32:18,037 So, I'm gonna be real with you. So, I'm gonna be real with you.
819 00:32:18,070 00:32:20,572 When you get paid, my family gets paid. When you get paid, my family gets paid.
820 00:32:20,606 00:32:23,275 There is no way that you're gonna get an audition There is no way that you're gonna get an audition
821 00:32:23,309 00:32:24,510 for the Tin Man. for the Tin Man.
822 00:32:24,543 00:32:26,088 That's like me, trying to audition That's like me, trying to audition
823 00:32:26,112 00:32:27,546 for the remake of Gandhi. for the remake of Gandhi.
824 00:32:27,579 00:32:30,149 That shit just ain't gonna happen. That shit just ain't gonna happen.
825 00:32:30,182 00:32:33,152 Nobody is gonna let you headlight your own movie Nobody is gonna let you headlight your own movie
826 00:32:33,185 00:32:35,197 unless you foot the bill and do it yourself. unless you foot the bill and do it yourself.
827 00:32:35,221 00:32:36,555 Now, check this out. Now, check this out.
828 00:32:36,588 00:32:39,025 Lucky Charms is looking for a new face. Lucky Charms is looking for a new face.
829 00:32:39,058 00:32:40,668 How do you feel about leprechauns? How do you feel about leprechauns?
830 00:32:40,692 00:32:42,470 Because they're gonna can that cartoon Because they're gonna can that cartoon
831 00:32:42,494 00:32:44,563 and go with live action. and go with live action.
832 00:32:44,596 00:32:45,497 But you know what, we'll talk about that later But you know what, we'll talk about that later
833 00:32:45,531 00:32:48,034 because you are cutting into my bubble time. because you are cutting into my bubble time.
834 00:33:02,581 00:33:05,051 Doing a stellar job on your Doing a stellar job on your
835 00:33:05,084 00:33:06,518 napkin folding. napkin folding.
836 00:33:13,692 00:33:15,727 Hey, Herman. Hey, Herman.
837 00:33:16,395 00:33:17,439 You gotta pay the rent. You gotta pay the rent.
838 00:33:17,463 00:33:18,564 I can't pay the rent. I can't pay the rent.
839 00:33:18,597 00:33:20,032 You gotta pay the rent. You gotta pay the rent.
840 00:33:20,066 00:33:20,699 I'll pay the rent. I'll pay the rent.
841 00:33:20,732 00:33:22,134 My hero! My hero!
842 00:33:22,168 00:33:23,178 Hey, everybody [get out of my door] Hey, everybody [get out of my door]
843 00:33:23,202 00:33:24,436 What are you doing here? What are you doing here?
844 00:33:24,470 00:33:25,713 She's got to pay the rent. She's got to pay the rent.
845 00:33:25,737 00:33:27,049 Why are you paying her rent? Why are you paying her rent?
846 00:33:27,073 00:33:28,383 Because I think she's real pretty. Because I think she's real pretty.
847 00:33:28,407 00:33:31,743 Hey, you guys looking for a good time? Hey, you guys looking for a good time?
848 00:33:33,312 00:33:34,413 Oh, I'm knife face. Oh, I'm knife face.
849 00:33:34,446 00:33:36,782 I got a knife on my face. I got a knife on my face.
850 00:33:36,815 00:33:39,751 Seriously, my throat or my [unintelligible]. Seriously, my throat or my [unintelligible].
851 00:33:40,452 00:33:43,189 I don't think we can use this anymore. I don't think we can use this anymore.
852 00:33:43,222 00:33:45,124 Tyrone has another audition for me. Tyrone has another audition for me.
853 00:33:45,157 00:33:46,258 Oh, brother. Oh, brother.
854 00:33:46,292 00:33:47,193 Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
855 00:33:47,226 00:33:48,336 I'm going to be a leprechaun! I'm going to be a leprechaun!
856 00:33:48,360 00:33:49,428 You cannot do that. You cannot do that.
857 00:33:49,461 00:33:50,829 That's not what he says. That's not what he says.
858 00:33:50,862 00:33:52,164 Seriously, Herman. Seriously, Herman.
859 00:33:52,198 00:33:53,308 You have got to start playing roles You have got to start playing roles
860 00:33:53,332 00:33:54,742 that show what you're capable of. that show what you're capable of.
861 00:33:54,766 00:33:56,144 If you're gonna be the leading man, If you're gonna be the leading man,
862 00:33:56,168 00:33:57,703 you have to do other things. you have to do other things.
863 00:33:57,736 00:33:59,238 I've tried Miller. I've tried Miller.
864 00:33:59,271 00:34:00,539 One time. One time.
865 00:34:00,572 00:34:02,174 What, you're just gonna give up? What, you're just gonna give up?
866 00:34:02,208 00:34:03,542 It's a dead end dummy. It's a dead end dummy.
867 00:34:03,575 00:34:05,320 The casting director wouldn't even let me read The casting director wouldn't even let me read
868 00:34:05,344 00:34:06,478 for the Tin Man. for the Tin Man.
869 00:34:06,512 00:34:07,622 So, go above the casting director. So, go above the casting director.
870 00:34:07,646 00:34:08,790 They don't make all the decisions. They don't make all the decisions.
871 00:34:08,814 00:34:11,150 I don't know Martin Scorsese. I don't know Martin Scorsese.
872 00:34:11,183 00:34:12,784 I can get to him. I can get to him.
873 00:34:12,818 00:34:14,253 How? How?
874 00:34:15,221 00:34:16,555 Inside information. Inside information.
875 00:34:16,588 00:34:18,766 Turns out Marty is doing an unscheduled appearance Turns out Marty is doing an unscheduled appearance
876 00:34:18,790 00:34:20,859 on Rachael Ray this week. on Rachael Ray this week.
877 00:34:20,892 00:34:23,129 I could drop off an audition tape for you. I could drop off an audition tape for you.
878 00:34:23,162 00:34:26,064 Martin Scorsese is doing the Rachael Ray Show? Martin Scorsese is doing the Rachael Ray Show?
879 00:34:26,265 00:34:27,566 Does he cook? Does he cook?
880 00:34:27,866 00:34:29,701 But you don't work there anymore. But you don't work there anymore.
881 00:34:29,735 00:34:31,703 Hey, I'm in the industry. Hey, I'm in the industry.
882 00:34:31,737 00:34:33,205 One call. One call.
883 00:34:35,841 00:34:37,376 Okay, that's awesome. Okay, that's awesome.
884 00:34:37,409 00:34:40,312 We can do something from the Wizard of Oz. We can do something from the Wizard of Oz.
885 00:34:40,346 00:34:41,313 Great. Great.
886 00:34:41,347 00:34:42,748 I can direct it. I can direct it.
887 00:34:42,781 00:34:44,183 Really? Really?
888 00:34:45,517 00:34:47,819 I think I want Juan to be the director. I think I want Juan to be the director.
889 00:34:51,623 00:34:53,091 Uh, Uh,
890 00:34:53,725 00:34:57,363 Mr. Herman, Pete has a lot of experience, Mr. Herman, Pete has a lot of experience,
891 00:34:57,396 00:35:00,332 I only have a subscription to Netflix. I only have a subscription to Netflix.
892 00:35:00,366 00:35:02,701 Yeah, but I need somebody I can trust. Yeah, but I need somebody I can trust.
893 00:35:02,734 00:35:05,771 You know more about film than any of my friends. You know more about film than any of my friends.
894 00:35:07,406 00:35:10,509 Juan, will you direct my audition tape? Juan, will you direct my audition tape?
895 00:35:11,610 00:35:14,180 If you want me to, sure. If you want me to, sure.
896 00:35:17,349 00:35:20,152 Well, Pete, you could be the cameraman. Well, Pete, you could be the cameraman.
897 00:35:20,552 00:35:22,821 Um, yeah, sure, I can do that. Um, yeah, sure, I can do that.
898 00:35:22,854 00:35:24,256 Fine. Fine.
899 00:35:24,756 00:35:28,194 I need a very talented young actress I need a very talented young actress
900 00:35:28,227 00:35:30,196 to play opposite me. to play opposite me.
901 00:35:30,229 00:35:32,331 Oh. (chuckles) Oh. (chuckles)
902 00:35:32,364 00:35:34,400 Thank you very much. Thank you very much.
903 00:35:34,433 00:35:36,402 You are talking about me, right? You are talking about me, right?
904 00:35:36,435 00:35:37,469 Yeah. Yeah.
905 00:35:37,503 00:35:40,806 Happy birthday! Happy birthday!
906 00:35:40,839 00:35:43,209 Tanti Auguri, it's your special day. Tanti Auguri, it's your special day.
907 00:35:43,242 00:35:44,276 You're older! You're older!
908 00:35:44,310 00:35:46,912 Okay, make a wish. Okay, make a wish.
909 00:35:46,945 00:35:49,348 Ohh! (Miller laughs) Ohh! (Miller laughs)
910 00:35:49,381 00:35:50,849 So what'd you wish for? So what'd you wish for?
911 00:35:50,882 00:35:52,351 Can I shoot an audition tape Can I shoot an audition tape
912 00:35:52,384 00:35:55,421 for Martin Scorsese at the restaurant, please? for Martin Scorsese at the restaurant, please?
913 00:35:55,454 00:35:57,223 What? (chuckles) What? (chuckles)
914 00:35:57,256 00:35:58,766 I mean I can't just shut the restaurant down I mean I can't just shut the restaurant down
915 00:35:58,790 00:36:00,526 for an entire day. (chuckles) for an entire day. (chuckles)
916 00:36:00,559 00:36:02,270 Please Gregg, it's for the Wizard of Oz Please Gregg, it's for the Wizard of Oz
917 00:36:02,294 00:36:04,496 and we could do it after hours. and we could do it after hours.
918 00:36:07,899 00:36:09,568 Well Well
919 00:36:10,636 00:36:11,970 Well, okay. Well, okay.
920 00:36:12,003 00:36:13,839 But only if I can play the Lion. But only if I can play the Lion.
921 00:36:13,872 00:36:16,608 I just really feel like I'm the king of the forest. I just really feel like I'm the king of the forest.
922 00:36:17,943 00:36:20,479 Deal. (Gregg laughs) Deal. (Gregg laughs)
923 00:36:20,512 00:36:22,648 I'm gonna be a star. (laughs) I'm gonna be a star. (laughs)
924 00:36:25,784 00:36:27,729 Seriously, you're not done wrapping the silverware? Seriously, you're not done wrapping the silverware?
925 00:36:27,753 00:36:28,787 Sorry. Sorry.
926 00:36:28,820 00:36:30,222 Can we really wrap these up? Can we really wrap these up?
927 00:36:30,622 00:36:32,491 I do pay you, so. I do pay you, so.
928 00:36:32,524 00:36:33,525 Okay. Okay.
929 00:36:42,000 00:36:43,802 This is gonna be fun. This is gonna be fun.
930 00:36:43,835 00:36:45,604 You know, if you really wanna catch You know, if you really wanna catch
931 00:36:45,637 00:36:48,607 Scorsese's eye, you need some costumes that pop. Scorsese's eye, you need some costumes that pop.
932 00:36:48,640 00:36:50,342 You can be in charge of that. You can be in charge of that.
933 00:36:50,376 00:36:52,554 I still need to pick out a scene for us to do. I still need to pick out a scene for us to do.
934 00:36:52,578 00:36:53,855 Why don't you ask your buddy Juan Why don't you ask your buddy Juan
935 00:36:53,879 00:36:54,846 for advice. for advice.
936 00:36:54,880 00:36:55,947 He's the expert. He's the expert.
937 00:36:55,981 00:36:57,359 You know, that's a good idea. You know, that's a good idea.
938 00:36:57,383 00:36:58,826 Juan, you're coming home with me. Juan, you're coming home with me.
939 00:36:58,850 00:36:59,718 When? When?
940 00:36:59,751 00:37:00,619 Right now. Right now.
941 00:37:00,652 00:37:01,787 We got work to do. We got work to do.
942 00:37:01,820 00:37:02,921 All right. All right.
943 00:37:02,954 00:37:03,755 I'm going home. I'm going home.
944 00:37:03,789 00:37:04,490 Goodnight. Goodnight.
945 00:37:04,523 00:37:05,624 Keep me posted. Keep me posted.
946 00:37:05,657 00:37:06,758 I'm exhausted. I'm exhausted.
947 00:37:06,792 00:37:08,560 Hey, I'll Hey, I'll
948 00:37:08,594 00:37:10,262 I'll walk with you. I'll walk with you.
949 00:37:11,062 00:37:12,664 Okay, sure. Okay, sure.
950 00:37:14,300 00:37:16,335 Hey, have fun gentlemen. Hey, have fun gentlemen.
951 00:37:21,473 00:37:23,742 Well, they make a cute couple. Well, they make a cute couple.
952 00:37:23,775 00:37:24,976 No, they don't, Gregg. No, they don't, Gregg.
953 00:37:25,577 00:37:26,745 Shut your mouth. Shut your mouth.
954 00:37:28,013 00:37:29,548 Not even close. Not even close.
955 00:37:29,581 00:37:32,017 Well, I'm gonna watch some trashy TV. Well, I'm gonna watch some trashy TV.
956 00:37:42,761 00:37:43,929 So So
957 00:37:44,363 00:37:46,064 Oh (both chuckles). Oh (both chuckles).
958 00:37:46,097 00:37:49,034 You and the little man seem pretty close. You and the little man seem pretty close.
959 00:37:49,067 00:37:51,337 Herman? Herman?
960 00:37:51,370 00:37:53,572 Yeah, we've known each other a long time. Yeah, we've known each other a long time.
961 00:37:54,340 00:37:55,774 Any romance? Any romance?
962 00:37:56,608 00:37:57,643 Huh? Huh?
963 00:37:58,076 00:37:58,977 Ha-ha? (Miller chuckles) Ha-ha? (Miller chuckles)
964 00:37:59,010 00:38:00,779 No, he's one of my best friends. No, he's one of my best friends.
965 00:38:00,812 00:38:03,048 Best friends, come on. Best friends, come on.
966 00:38:03,081 00:38:05,651 Somebody's always gonna like someone. Somebody's always gonna like someone.
967 00:38:05,684 00:38:07,353 That's not true. That's not true.
968 00:38:07,386 00:38:09,063 It doesn't always have to be some hidden agenda It doesn't always have to be some hidden agenda
969 00:38:09,087 00:38:11,623 when it comes to the opposite sex. when it comes to the opposite sex.
970 00:38:11,657 00:38:14,025 Yeah, it does when of them looks like him. Yeah, it does when of them looks like him.
971 00:38:15,927 00:38:17,028 (laughs) (laughs)
972 00:38:17,062 00:38:17,863 Okay. Okay.
973 00:38:17,896 00:38:19,598 What's your deal? What's your deal?
974 00:38:19,631 00:38:21,900 Where are you from? Where are you from?
975 00:38:21,933 00:38:25,036 I'm just a dude made in America. I'm just a dude made in America.
976 00:38:25,637 00:38:26,781 All right, I'll tell you where I'm from All right, I'll tell you where I'm from
977 00:38:26,805 00:38:29,307 if I can buy you a beer. if I can buy you a beer.
978 00:38:30,609 00:38:31,810 Okay. Okay.
979 00:38:32,711 00:38:35,514 What do you drink, stout? (chuckles) What do you drink, stout? (chuckles)
980 00:38:35,547 00:38:38,750 I actually, prefer long necks. I actually, prefer long necks.
981 00:38:43,021 00:38:45,357 All I have is IPA. All I have is IPA.
982 00:38:45,391 00:38:45,991 Oh, no. Oh, no.
983 00:38:46,024 00:38:47,459 Thank you Mr. Herman. Thank you Mr. Herman.
984 00:38:47,493 00:38:49,094 I don't drink alcohol. I don't drink alcohol.
985 00:38:49,127 00:38:49,928 Well, then I'll just have one Well, then I'll just have one
986 00:38:49,961 00:38:51,363 for both of us. for both of us.
987 00:38:51,397 00:38:52,631 Sure. Sure.
988 00:39:00,672 00:39:03,442 So, Juan, any ladies in your life? So, Juan, any ladies in your life?
989 00:39:03,475 00:39:07,112 Only one, my wife back in Mexico City. Only one, my wife back in Mexico City.
990 00:39:07,779 00:39:10,081 Actually, I have a picture of her. Actually, I have a picture of her.
991 00:39:11,517 00:39:12,884 Wow. Wow.
992 00:39:12,918 00:39:15,587 How come I never noticed a ring on your finger? How come I never noticed a ring on your finger?
993 00:39:16,888 00:39:18,123 Well, Well,
994 00:39:19,491 00:39:20,491 I sold it. I sold it.
995 00:39:21,560 00:39:23,829 To send money back to my family. To send money back to my family.
996 00:39:23,862 00:39:25,397 I see. I see.
997 00:39:30,001 00:39:32,137 So, do you think Miller likes Pete? So, do you think Miller likes Pete?
998 00:39:32,170 00:39:33,539 What? What?
999 00:39:34,005 00:39:35,140 I don't know. I don't know.
1000 00:39:35,173 00:39:36,818 I can't see anything back in the kitchen. I can't see anything back in the kitchen.
1001 00:39:36,842 00:39:38,185 Yeah, but did you see the way Yeah, but did you see the way
1002 00:39:38,209 00:39:40,659 Pete was acting around her when they left tonight? Pete was acting around her when they left tonight?
1003 00:39:40,946 00:39:42,657 I just thought he was being a gentleman I just thought he was being a gentleman
1004 00:39:42,681 00:39:44,683 by walking her home. by walking her home.
1005 00:39:45,116 00:39:46,818 You're being deceived my friend. You're being deceived my friend.
1006 00:39:46,852 00:39:49,488 Listen, we gotta save Miller. Listen, we gotta save Miller.
1007 00:39:49,521 00:39:51,457 The only reason Pete's helping out The only reason Pete's helping out
1008 00:39:51,490 00:39:54,135 with this project is because he wants to get in her pants. with this project is because he wants to get in her pants.
1009 00:39:54,159 00:39:57,463 He doesn't care about you or me. He doesn't care about you or me.
1010 00:39:58,730 00:40:00,599 I'm not dogging Pete here. I'm not dogging Pete here.
1011 00:40:00,632 00:40:02,568 All I'm saying is that All I'm saying is that
1012 00:40:02,601 00:40:04,570 Miller's too good for him. Miller's too good for him.
1013 00:40:04,903 00:40:06,781 She deserves to be with someone who will treat her She deserves to be with someone who will treat her
1014 00:40:06,805 00:40:09,941 with respect and appreciate her for who she is. with respect and appreciate her for who she is.
1015 00:40:12,110 00:40:14,680 Now, is there any way we can articulate that Now, is there any way we can articulate that
1016 00:40:14,713 00:40:16,081 in the scene? in the scene?
1017 00:40:18,950 00:40:21,587 Sounds like you want romance. Sounds like you want romance.
1018 00:40:22,488 00:40:23,855 Yes! Yes!
1019 00:40:23,889 00:40:28,093 Mr. Herman, the Wizard of Oz is not a love story. Mr. Herman, the Wizard of Oz is not a love story.
1020 00:40:28,727 00:40:30,529 It is tonight, Juan. It is tonight, Juan.
1021 00:40:30,562 00:40:31,806 We're gonna write a new scene We're gonna write a new scene
1022 00:40:31,830 00:40:33,832 with Tin Man and Dorothy. with Tin Man and Dorothy.
1023 00:40:36,034 00:40:42,207 Two friends who deserved to be together. Two friends who deserved to be together.
1024 00:40:42,808 00:40:45,544 They're destined to be together. They're destined to be together.
1025 00:40:45,577 00:40:47,913 Except one of them doesn't know yet. Except one of them doesn't know yet.
1026 00:40:48,880 00:40:50,949 Dorothy is blind to the truth Dorothy is blind to the truth
1027 00:40:50,982 00:40:53,194 and the only way that the Tin Man can open the eyes and the only way that the Tin Man can open the eyes
1028 00:40:53,218 00:40:56,054 of his fair maiden is to kiss her. of his fair maiden is to kiss her.
1029 00:40:56,755 00:40:57,965 Kiss her before Pete does. Kiss her before Pete does.
1030 00:40:57,989 00:40:59,691 Wait, what? Wait, what?
1031 00:41:03,829 00:41:06,097 This one's for you, Juan. This one's for you, Juan.
1032 00:41:06,131 00:41:11,970 (playful music) (playful music)
1033 00:41:16,575 00:41:21,747 (easy listening rock music) (easy listening rock music)
1034 00:41:21,780 00:41:22,648 Cheers. (chuckles) Cheers. (chuckles)
1035 00:41:22,681 00:41:23,681 Cheers. Cheers.
1036 00:41:23,982 00:41:26,518 Whoa, whoa, ojos. Whoa, whoa, ojos.
1037 00:41:27,052 00:41:27,953 Ojos? Ojos?
1038 00:41:27,986 00:41:28,920 Juan taught me that. Juan taught me that.
1039 00:41:28,954 00:41:30,055 We gotta do it again. We gotta do it again.
1040 00:41:30,088 00:41:31,699 Gotta make the eye contact with the cheers. Gotta make the eye contact with the cheers.
1041 00:41:31,723 00:41:32,658 Oh, eye contact. Oh, eye contact.
1042 00:41:32,691 00:41:34,025 Okay, all right, sorry. Okay, all right, sorry.
1043 00:41:34,059 00:41:35,527 Cheers. Cheers.
1044 00:41:35,561 00:41:36,795 Hmm. Hmm.
1045 00:41:38,930 00:41:40,198 You didn't drink. You didn't drink.
1046 00:41:40,231 00:41:41,633 Oh, sorry about that. Oh, sorry about that.
1047 00:41:41,667 00:41:44,703 I got distracted with those eyes of yours. I got distracted with those eyes of yours.
1048 00:41:46,237 00:41:49,841 (chuckles) You're stupid. (chuckles) You're stupid.
1049 00:41:49,875 00:41:52,944 Mm-hmm. (Miller laughs) Mm-hmm. (Miller laughs)
1050 00:41:53,178 00:41:54,922 [I don't know but you have a point.] [I don't know but you have a point.]
1051 00:41:54,946 00:41:55,914 Oh, I'm scared. Oh, I'm scared.
1052 00:41:55,947 00:41:57,716 You know, you should be. You know, you should be.
1053 00:41:57,749 00:41:59,718 Yeah, it's no big deal. Yeah, it's no big deal.
1054 00:41:59,751 00:42:00,552 Okay, what? Okay, what?
1055 00:42:00,586 00:42:01,553 What is it? What is it?
1056 00:42:01,587 00:42:03,689 Smile if you wanna kiss me. Smile if you wanna kiss me.
1057 00:42:05,123 00:42:07,125 Yeah, I thought so. Yeah, I thought so.
1058 00:42:08,827 00:42:10,862 It's happening at a bar. It's happening at a bar.
1059 00:42:16,968 00:42:24,968 (Herman snoring) (Herman snoring)
1060 00:42:26,945 00:42:29,214 (phone ringing) (phone ringing)
1061 00:42:32,718 00:42:34,185 Juan. Juan.
1062 00:42:35,854 00:42:38,924 Juan, what are you doing here? Juan, what are you doing here?
1063 00:42:39,858 00:42:40,358 Hello? Hello?
1064 00:42:40,391 00:42:41,727 Hey, you! Hey, you!
1065 00:42:43,895 00:42:45,096 Who is this? Who is this?
1066 00:42:45,130 00:42:46,865 It's Miller. It's Miller.
1067 00:42:47,666 00:42:48,834 Hey, Miller. Hey, Miller.
1068 00:42:48,867 00:42:49,968 What's up? What's up?
1069 00:42:50,001 00:42:52,838 I was just reading your script. I was just reading your script.
1070 00:42:53,338 00:42:54,405 Huh? Huh?
1071 00:42:54,439 00:42:56,675 The scene we're shooting for your audition. The scene we're shooting for your audition.
1072 00:42:56,708 00:42:59,845 Yeah, I'm still trying to pick it out. Yeah, I'm still trying to pick it out.
1073 00:42:59,878 00:43:00,955 Oh, you already e-mailed it to me, Oh, you already e-mailed it to me,
1074 00:43:00,979 00:43:02,948 you silly butt (laughs). you silly butt (laughs).
1075 00:43:02,981 00:43:03,849 I did? I did?
1076 00:43:03,882 00:43:05,050 Yeah, (laughs). Yeah, (laughs).
1077 00:43:05,083 00:43:06,227 Hey, I thought we were gonna just do something Hey, I thought we were gonna just do something
1078 00:43:06,251 00:43:07,328 from the Wizard of Oz. from the Wizard of Oz.
1079 00:43:07,352 00:43:08,696 I didn't think that you're actually gonna write I didn't think that you're actually gonna write
1080 00:43:08,720 00:43:10,689 an entire scene. an entire scene.
1081 00:43:11,289 00:43:14,225 Juan, we e-mailed the script to Miller? Juan, we e-mailed the script to Miller?
1082 00:43:14,259 00:43:16,127 I didn't send it to her. I didn't send it to her.
1083 00:43:21,266 00:43:23,244 I should probably listen to some Ray Charles I should probably listen to some Ray Charles
1084 00:43:23,268 00:43:24,311 or walk around my apartment in the dark or walk around my apartment in the dark
1085 00:43:24,335 00:43:25,412 or something like that. or something like that.
1086 00:43:25,436 00:43:27,673 Can you hold on for a second? Can you hold on for a second?
1087 00:43:27,706 00:43:30,041 We wrote a story about a blind girl? We wrote a story about a blind girl?
1088 00:43:30,075 00:43:31,376 It was your idea. It was your idea.
1089 00:43:31,409 00:43:32,878 I was drunk. I was drunk.
1090 00:43:32,911 00:43:34,112 Drunk? Drunk?
1091 00:43:34,145 00:43:37,182 You had only two beers. You had only two beers.
1092 00:43:37,215 00:43:39,017 So, uh, what So, uh, what
1093 00:43:39,050 00:43:41,186 what'd you like about it? what'd you like about it?
1094 00:43:41,352 00:43:43,088 Oh, Dorothy having to go blind Oh, Dorothy having to go blind
1095 00:43:43,121 00:43:44,131 so she can see the Tin Man so she can see the Tin Man
1096 00:43:44,155 00:43:46,091 for who he truly is, I love it. for who he truly is, I love it.
1097 00:43:46,124 00:43:47,826 Herman, it's great! Herman, it's great!
1098 00:43:47,859 00:43:49,795 Oh, you know, we were Oh, you know, we were
1099 00:43:50,295 00:43:52,030 We were looking for something We were looking for something
1100 00:43:52,063 00:43:54,199 with a little more depth. with a little more depth.
1101 00:43:54,232 00:43:57,002 You don't really find that in the original. You don't really find that in the original.
1102 00:43:57,168 00:43:58,312 Hey, what are you doing right now? Hey, what are you doing right now?
1103 00:43:58,336 00:43:59,346 Because we should probably run these lines Because we should probably run these lines
1104 00:43:59,370 00:44:00,371 as soon as possible. as soon as possible.
1105 00:44:00,405 00:44:02,207 Yeah, sure, sure. Yeah, sure, sure.
1106 00:44:02,240 00:44:03,709 I can meet you. I can meet you.
1107 00:44:03,742 00:44:04,676 Okay, great. Okay, great.
1108 00:44:04,710 00:44:05,744 I'm at Toast. I'm at Toast.
1109 00:44:05,777 00:44:07,121 So, get here because I'm starving. So, get here because I'm starving.
1110 00:44:07,145 00:44:08,747 All right. All right.
1111 00:44:21,392 00:44:22,327 Mm! Mm!
1112 00:44:22,360 00:44:24,471 Thank you for meeting me on such short notice. Thank you for meeting me on such short notice.
1113 00:44:24,495 00:44:26,965 No, thank you. No, thank you.
1114 00:44:26,998 00:44:29,835 Miller, I truly appreciate all you're doing for this. Miller, I truly appreciate all you're doing for this.
1115 00:44:29,868 00:44:31,369 Thank you very much. Thank you very much.
1116 00:44:31,402 00:44:33,739 And you, you look beautiful. And you, you look beautiful.
1117 00:44:34,472 00:44:36,742 Aw, Herman. Aw, Herman.
1118 00:44:36,942 00:44:39,120 Hey, do you mind if I run to the bathroom real quick? Hey, do you mind if I run to the bathroom real quick?
1119 00:44:39,144 00:44:40,979 I've been holding it in for a while. I've been holding it in for a while.
1120 00:44:41,012 00:44:41,813 Of course. Of course.
1121 00:44:41,847 00:44:43,014 Okay, good. Okay, good.
1122 00:44:43,815 00:44:45,116 Don't you dare. Don't you dare.
1123 00:44:45,150 00:44:47,285 You know how I feel about that. You know how I feel about that.
1124 00:44:47,753 00:44:49,803 I got eyes at the back of my head, Herman. I got eyes at the back of my head, Herman.
1125 00:44:53,058 00:44:55,293 Hey, little man! Hey, little man!
1126 00:44:55,426 00:44:56,862 How's it going? How's it going?
1127 00:44:56,895 00:44:58,329 What are you doing here? What are you doing here?
1128 00:44:58,363 00:45:00,041 Miller said you guys are running lines. Miller said you guys are running lines.
1129 00:45:00,065 00:45:01,767 Thought I'd listen in. Thought I'd listen in.
1130 00:45:01,800 00:45:04,369 So I can visualize the shots. So I can visualize the shots.
1131 00:45:04,402 00:45:07,172 You can do that from just reading the script? You can do that from just reading the script?
1132 00:45:07,205 00:45:08,874 I could but it jumps off the page I could but it jumps off the page
1133 00:45:08,907 00:45:10,976 when you hear the actors say it, you know. when you hear the actors say it, you know.
1134 00:45:11,009 00:45:12,143 Yeah. Yeah.
1135 00:45:12,177 00:45:14,980 So, the two of you been hanging out? So, the two of you been hanging out?
1136 00:45:15,013 00:45:16,381 Just the two of you? Just the two of you?
1137 00:45:16,414 00:45:17,983 I got a late start this morning I got a late start this morning
1138 00:45:18,016 00:45:21,252 and Miller was starving so I came over here. and Miller was starving so I came over here.
1139 00:45:21,286 00:45:23,922 What'd you do last night? What'd you do last night?
1140 00:45:24,990 00:45:26,457 We hung out. We hung out.
1141 00:45:26,491 00:45:28,760 Just hung out? Just hung out?
1142 00:45:29,360 00:45:32,297 I very much enjoyed getting to know her better. I very much enjoyed getting to know her better.
1143 00:45:32,497 00:45:35,466 Well, how much better do you know her now? Well, how much better do you know her now?
1144 00:45:36,034 00:45:37,879 Well, let's just say that I spent the night Well, let's just say that I spent the night
1145 00:45:37,903 00:45:39,437 at her place. at her place.
1146 00:45:40,939 00:45:44,109 So, how's your love life, little man? So, how's your love life, little man?
1147 00:45:44,142 00:45:45,410 It's okay. It's okay.
1148 00:45:45,443 00:45:46,945 You know, You know,
1149 00:45:47,378 00:45:49,314 I'm playing the field right now. I'm playing the field right now.
1150 00:45:49,347 00:45:51,316 Keeping my options open. Keeping my options open.
1151 00:45:51,349 00:45:53,518 I have a lot on my plate. I have a lot on my plate.
1152 00:45:55,253 00:45:57,388 Hey, so I wanna ask you. Hey, so I wanna ask you.
1153 00:45:57,422 00:46:00,325 How do you guys hook up, you know, How do you guys hook up, you know,
1154 00:46:01,092 00:46:02,327 you people? you people?
1155 00:46:02,360 00:46:03,461 My people? My people?
1156 00:46:03,494 00:46:04,395 Yeah. Yeah.
1157 00:46:04,429 00:46:05,897 Well, every Christmas, Well, every Christmas,
1158 00:46:05,931 00:46:07,833 we meet at the north pole. we meet at the north pole.
1159 00:46:07,866 00:46:09,200 We mix, mingle and mate We mix, mingle and mate
1160 00:46:09,234 00:46:10,912 and then we slip back into the wilderness. and then we slip back into the wilderness.
1161 00:46:10,936 00:46:13,504 You know, like marching penguins. You know, like marching penguins.
1162 00:46:13,538 00:46:15,373 That movie sucked. That movie sucked.
1163 00:46:15,406 00:46:16,942 So, what did I miss? So, what did I miss?
1164 00:46:16,975 00:46:17,508 Hey. Hey.
1165 00:46:17,542 00:46:18,877 Hi. Hi.
1166 00:46:18,910 00:46:20,121 We're just shooting the shot. We're just shooting the shot.
1167 00:46:20,145 00:46:22,180 Yeah, just shooting the shot. Yeah, just shooting the shot.
1168 00:46:24,615 00:46:25,383 Okay! Okay!
1169 00:46:25,416 00:46:27,018 Let's get started. Let's get started.
1170 00:46:27,052 00:46:28,329 Herman, when we get to the kissing part, Herman, when we get to the kissing part,
1171 00:46:28,353 00:46:30,264 we'll just be like, lalalalala, we're kissing. we'll just be like, lalalalala, we're kissing.
1172 00:46:30,288 00:46:31,256 Yeah, of course. Yeah, of course.
1173 00:46:31,289 00:46:32,557 What page is that? What page is that?
1174 00:46:32,590 00:46:33,959 Page three. Page three.
1175 00:46:33,992 00:46:36,461 When Tin Man confesses his love to Dorothy. When Tin Man confesses his love to Dorothy.
1176 00:46:36,494 00:46:37,829 Right. Right.
1177 00:46:37,863 00:46:38,529 I didn't know there was a kissing scene I didn't know there was a kissing scene
1178 00:46:38,563 00:46:40,531 in the Wizard of Oz. in the Wizard of Oz.
1179 00:46:40,565 00:46:42,000 Well, we Well, we
1180 00:46:42,033 00:46:43,144 We tweaked it a little. We tweaked it a little.
1181 00:46:43,168 00:46:44,102 Juan and I did. Juan and I did.
1182 00:46:44,135 00:46:45,446 Just kinda give it a little pop. Just kinda give it a little pop.
1183 00:46:45,470 00:46:47,538 Punch it up a little bit, you know. Punch it up a little bit, you know.
1184 00:46:47,572 00:46:49,140 You rewrote Wizard of Oz. You rewrote Wizard of Oz.
1185 00:46:49,174 00:46:50,976 Pete, you know, they worked really Pete, you know, they worked really
1186 00:46:51,009 00:46:52,509 They worked really hard on it. They worked really hard on it.
1187 00:46:53,011 00:46:54,989 I'm just saying it's an American classic. I'm just saying it's an American classic.
1188 00:46:55,013 00:46:57,448 Isn't it a little weird to be rewriting it? Isn't it a little weird to be rewriting it?
1189 00:46:57,482 00:47:00,285 Yeah, it's you know, children's story Yeah, it's you know, children's story
1190 00:47:00,318 00:47:03,889 and we just thought it needed a little more flavor. and we just thought it needed a little more flavor.
1191 00:47:04,222 00:47:07,158 I wanted to show my range. I wanted to show my range.
1192 00:47:07,192 00:47:09,527 I was trying to prove myself, you know, I was trying to prove myself, you know,
1193 00:47:09,560 00:47:11,262 be a leading man. be a leading man.
1194 00:47:11,296 00:47:11,997 Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
1195 00:47:12,030 00:47:13,164 Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
1196 00:47:13,198 00:47:16,034 I see leading man written all over him. I see leading man written all over him.
1197 00:47:18,236 00:47:19,938 Anyone else hungry? Anyone else hungry?
1198 00:47:19,971 00:47:23,241 I feel like kind weird that no one eating. I feel like kind weird that no one eating.
1199 00:47:23,441 00:47:26,011 No, suddenly I've lost my appetite. No, suddenly I've lost my appetite.
1200 00:47:26,044 00:47:27,278 Really? Really?
1201 00:47:27,312 00:47:29,190 Well, I could go for some eggs right now. Well, I could go for some eggs right now.
1202 00:47:29,214 00:47:30,148 Salad maybe? Salad maybe?
1203 00:47:30,181 00:47:30,982 And some turkey bacon. And some turkey bacon.
1204 00:47:31,016 00:47:32,150 Mm-mm. Mm-mm.
1205 00:47:32,183 00:47:33,394 I'd like a good stiff drink really. I'd like a good stiff drink really.
1206 00:47:33,418 00:47:34,419 Okay. Okay.
1207 00:47:34,452 00:47:36,121 Kinda early for that, right? Kinda early for that, right?
1208 00:47:36,154 00:47:37,288 Not for me. Not for me.
1209 00:47:37,322 00:47:41,059 (upbeat music) (upbeat music)
1210 00:47:45,130 00:47:46,397 (Gregg chuckles) (Gregg chuckles)
1211 00:47:46,431 00:47:47,565 So, Gregg, So, Gregg,
1212 00:47:47,598 00:47:50,035 how do you know the designer again? how do you know the designer again?
1213 00:47:50,068 00:47:51,636 Oh, he was college roommate Oh, he was college roommate
1214 00:47:51,669 00:47:54,973 but now, he designs costumes for Broadway shows. but now, he designs costumes for Broadway shows.
1215 00:47:55,473 00:47:57,008 Greggory? Greggory?
1216 00:47:57,042 00:48:00,011 Oh, (laughs loudly) oh, you old show queen. Oh, (laughs loudly) oh, you old show queen.
1217 00:48:00,979 00:48:02,180 Hi, Strawberry. Hi, Strawberry.
1218 00:48:02,213 00:48:03,949 Oh my goodness, you got taller? Oh my goodness, you got taller?
1219 00:48:03,982 00:48:05,516 No, thinner. (both laughs) No, thinner. (both laughs)
1220 00:48:05,550 00:48:06,918 Maybe that's it. Maybe that's it.
1221 00:48:06,952 00:48:08,153 Maybe that's it. Maybe that's it.
1222 00:48:08,186 00:48:09,296 Anyway, thank you so much for doing this. Anyway, thank you so much for doing this.
1223 00:48:09,320 00:48:10,188 Oh, are you kidding me? Oh, are you kidding me?
1224 00:48:10,221 00:48:12,090 It is my absolute pleasure. It is my absolute pleasure.
1225 00:48:12,123 00:48:13,367 I already have your costume ready. I already have your costume ready.
1226 00:48:13,391 00:48:14,701 It was one of the prototypes that I pitched It was one of the prototypes that I pitched
1227 00:48:14,725 00:48:16,437 when I was originally working on the Lion King. when I was originally working on the Lion King.
1228 00:48:16,461 00:48:19,697 Julie Taymor, did not Julie Taymor, did not
1229 00:48:19,730 00:48:21,232 like it. like it.
1230 00:48:21,632 00:48:24,035 Well, she's a fool because I have jungle fever. Well, she's a fool because I have jungle fever.
1231 00:48:24,069 00:48:25,570 (both laughing) (both laughing)
1232 00:48:25,603 00:48:26,938 Are you feeling all right? Are you feeling all right?
1233 00:48:26,972 00:48:28,173 Should I call a doctor? Should I call a doctor?
1234 00:48:28,206 00:48:30,175 (Strawberry laughing loudly) (Strawberry laughing loudly)
1235 00:48:30,208 00:48:31,676 Oh, you are delicious, Juan. Oh, you are delicious, Juan.
1236 00:48:31,709 00:48:33,244 Can I keep this one? Can I keep this one?
1237 00:48:33,278 00:48:35,022 Okay, the sanctuary is [unintelligible] okay? Okay, the sanctuary is [unintelligible] okay?
1238 00:48:35,046 00:48:35,646 Just hands off. Just hands off.
1239 00:48:35,680 00:48:36,681 You are bad. You are bad.
1240 00:48:36,714 00:48:37,648 Oh, am I? Oh, am I?
1241 00:48:37,682 00:48:39,060 Oh, I hope you don't spank me. Oh, I hope you don't spank me.
1242 00:48:39,084 00:48:40,151 Well, I might. Oh no! Well, I might. Oh no!
1243 00:48:40,185 00:48:42,620 I may, I may, I may (both giggling). I may, I may, I may (both giggling).
1244 00:48:43,288 00:48:46,057 Gees, is my little tulip here gonna be Gees, is my little tulip here gonna be
1245 00:48:46,091 00:48:48,259 the scarecrow or... the scarecrow or...
1246 00:48:48,293 00:48:49,094 No, Gregg. No, Gregg.
1247 00:48:49,127 00:48:50,028 I am not in it. I am not in it.
1248 00:48:50,061 00:48:51,429 No, you have to do it. No, you have to do it.
1249 00:48:51,462 00:48:52,497 It'll be so cool. It'll be so cool.
1250 00:48:52,530 00:48:54,699 We'll have the entire Oz gang there We'll have the entire Oz gang there
1251 00:48:54,732 00:48:55,842 because we already have a Dorothy because we already have a Dorothy
1252 00:48:55,866 00:48:57,578 and then my brother, Herman is playing the Tin Man. and then my brother, Herman is playing the Tin Man.
1253 00:48:57,602 00:48:58,703 Right. Right.
1254 00:48:58,736 00:49:00,081 Oh, I absolutely died when you told me. Oh, I absolutely died when you told me.
1255 00:49:00,105 00:49:01,615 I hung up the phone and I literally fainted I hung up the phone and I literally fainted
1256 00:49:01,639 00:49:04,642 and just laid there for several hours. and just laid there for several hours.
1257 00:49:05,243 00:49:07,478 (sighs) It's a hard day. (sighs) It's a hard day.
1258 00:49:07,512 00:49:08,689 But I do have something for Herman But I do have something for Herman
1259 00:49:08,713 00:49:10,148 that would be perfect. that would be perfect.
1260 00:49:10,181 00:49:11,482 Let me see. Let me see.
1261 00:49:11,516 00:49:12,317 I might need to make just a couple alterations. I might need to make just a couple alterations.
1262 00:49:12,350 00:49:14,185 It's from my sequin line It's from my sequin line
1263 00:49:14,219 00:49:17,188 with a silver sequins live! (laughs loudly). with a silver sequins live! (laughs loudly).
1264 00:49:17,522 00:49:19,157 I love it. I love it.
1265 00:49:19,190 00:49:20,291 Yes? Yes?
1266 00:49:20,325 00:49:22,660 But I think Herman's gonna say, But I think Herman's gonna say,
1267 00:49:23,194 00:49:24,662 "Less Liberachi." "Less Liberachi."
1268 00:49:24,695 00:49:25,730 Okay. Okay.
1269 00:49:25,763 00:49:28,066 What do you think? What do you think?
1270 00:49:28,366 00:49:31,069 I don't really like it. I don't really like it.
1271 00:49:31,602 00:49:33,671 Wow, didn't sugarcoat that at all. Wow, didn't sugarcoat that at all.
1272 00:49:33,704 00:49:36,141 That's how you really feel. That's how you really feel.
1273 00:49:36,174 00:49:37,308 Bitch. Bitch.
1274 00:49:38,209 00:49:40,311 [inaudible] [inaudible]
1275 00:49:54,659 00:49:56,803 Miller, the eHarmony table is still going at it. Miller, the eHarmony table is still going at it.
1276 00:49:56,827 00:49:58,429 They sure are. They sure are.
1277 00:49:58,463 00:50:01,132 Man, they have been all over each other. Man, they have been all over each other.
1278 00:50:01,166 00:50:02,276 Drop the check, little man. Drop the check, little man.
1279 00:50:02,300 00:50:04,169 We are closed. We are closed.
1280 00:50:06,437 00:50:07,805 So, how's your night? So, how's your night?
1281 00:50:07,838 00:50:09,140 Yeah, pretty good. Yeah, pretty good.
1282 00:50:09,174 00:50:10,484 Yeah, did you make some money? Yeah, did you make some money?
1283 00:50:10,508 00:50:11,209 I did. I did.
1284 00:50:11,242 00:50:11,776 Really? Really?
1285 00:50:11,809 00:50:13,178 Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
1286 00:50:13,211 00:50:14,288 Did they tip the bartender handsomely? Did they tip the bartender handsomely?
1287 00:50:14,312 00:50:16,281 We don't do that here. We don't do that here.
1288 00:50:16,314 00:50:17,482 Really? Really?
1289 00:50:17,515 00:50:19,784 Kind of a new policy. Kind of a new policy.
1290 00:50:19,817 00:50:22,753 What kinda joint is this? What kinda joint is this?
1291 00:50:23,654 00:50:25,456 They didn't even look at me. They didn't even look at me.
1292 00:50:25,490 00:50:28,259 Well, give them a reason to look at you. Well, give them a reason to look at you.
1293 00:50:29,760 00:50:31,529 Wait, wait, what are you doing? Wait, wait, what are you doing?
1294 00:50:31,562 00:50:32,806 Oh my god, what are you doing? (laughs) Oh my god, what are you doing? (laughs)
1295 00:50:32,830 00:50:33,498 Oh no! Oh no!
1296 00:50:33,531 00:50:34,599 Hey! Hey!
1297 00:50:34,632 00:50:37,302 Right there! (laughs loudly) Right there! (laughs loudly)
1298 00:50:37,335 00:50:39,170 Yeah, plug it in! Yeah, plug it in!
1299 00:50:39,204 00:50:40,571 Leave a tip! Leave a tip!
1300 00:50:40,605 00:50:41,572 Down the middle! Down the middle!
1301 00:50:41,606 00:50:42,707 Goodbye! Goodbye!
1302 00:50:42,740 00:50:44,742 Goodnight. Goodnight.
1303 00:50:45,310 00:50:46,444 Yes! Yes!
1304 00:50:46,477 00:50:47,178 Wow. Wow.
1305 00:50:47,212 00:50:48,379 Classy. Classy.
1306 00:50:48,413 00:50:49,714 One word to describe you. One word to describe you.
1307 00:50:49,747 00:50:51,048 Classy. Classy.
1308 00:50:52,217 00:50:53,284 Good evening. Good evening.
1309 00:50:53,318 00:50:54,795 Can I get you something to drink? Can I get you something to drink?
1310 00:50:54,819 00:50:57,722 Can I get you something to drink? Can I get you something to drink?
1311 00:50:57,755 00:50:58,356 Good evening. Good evening.
1312 00:50:58,389 00:50:59,224 Can I Can I
1313 00:50:59,257 00:51:01,292 Juan, how's my delivery? Juan, how's my delivery?
1314 00:51:01,326 00:51:02,427 It can use some work. It can use some work.
1315 00:51:02,460 00:51:05,430 Wow, you just refuse to soften those blows. Wow, you just refuse to soften those blows.
1316 00:51:06,364 00:51:07,465 Look, Gregg. Look, Gregg.
1317 00:51:07,498 00:51:10,168 As the Lion, you are completely between As the Lion, you are completely between
1318 00:51:10,201 00:51:13,371 you raising for power and that nagging insecurity you raising for power and that nagging insecurity
1319 00:51:13,404 00:51:15,773 that plagues your ability to lead. that plagues your ability to lead.
1320 00:51:17,342 00:51:18,443 Wow. Wow.
1321 00:51:18,476 00:51:21,112 I never thought about it like that. I never thought about it like that.
1322 00:51:23,414 00:51:25,516 Good evening. Good evening.
1323 00:51:25,883 00:51:27,418 Good eve Good eve
1324 00:51:27,452 00:51:28,553 Good eve- Good eve-
1325 00:51:28,586 00:51:31,088 Good evening. Good evening.
1326 00:51:47,205 00:51:49,540 You've got to be kidding me. You've got to be kidding me.
1327 00:51:53,378 00:51:55,280 [inaudible] [inaudible]
1328 00:51:55,313 00:51:57,315 (gasps) Oh my god! (gasps) Oh my god!
1329 00:51:57,348 00:51:58,783 (laughs) (laughs)
1330 00:51:58,816 00:52:01,386 You are the cutest thing I've ever seen. You are the cutest thing I've ever seen.
1331 00:52:01,419 00:52:02,653 I'm gonna kill Gregg. I'm gonna kill Gregg.
1332 00:52:02,687 00:52:03,854 I feel ridiculous. I feel ridiculous.
1333 00:52:03,888 00:52:04,922 You'll get over it. You'll get over it.
1334 00:52:04,955 00:52:07,158 Hey, is my lipstick too much? Hey, is my lipstick too much?
1335 00:52:07,192 00:52:07,792 No. No.
1336 00:52:07,825 00:52:09,694 You look beautiful. You look beautiful.
1337 00:52:10,361 00:52:12,597 Are we off to see the wizard or what? Are we off to see the wizard or what?
1338 00:52:12,630 00:52:13,431 Wow. Wow.
1339 00:52:13,464 00:52:14,599 I know. I know.
1340 00:52:14,632 00:52:16,677 Didn't these costumes just turn out great? Didn't these costumes just turn out great?
1341 00:52:16,701 00:52:17,835 Hey, Gregg. Hey, Gregg.
1342 00:52:17,868 00:52:19,818 Aren't I supposed to have ruby slippers? Aren't I supposed to have ruby slippers?
1343 00:52:21,506 00:52:22,407 Well, in the book, Well, in the book,
1344 00:52:22,440 00:52:25,376 they were silver and Strawberry really wanted they were silver and Strawberry really wanted
1345 00:52:25,410 00:52:28,513 to stay truthful to the source material. to stay truthful to the source material.
1346 00:52:28,879 00:52:31,249 He couldn't find any, could he? He couldn't find any, could he?
1347 00:52:31,282 00:52:33,551 Nobody will see your feet. Nobody will see your feet.
1348 00:52:35,320 00:52:36,597 Juan, what are you wearing? Juan, what are you wearing?
1349 00:52:36,621 00:52:37,922 I'm the Scarecrow. I'm the Scarecrow.
1350 00:52:37,955 00:52:39,357 Hey, Mr. Herman, Hey, Mr. Herman,
1351 00:52:39,390 00:52:41,859 would you mind if I say a little prayer for us would you mind if I say a little prayer for us
1352 00:52:41,892 00:52:43,294 before we started? before we started?
1353 00:52:43,328 00:52:44,429 Sure. Sure.
1354 00:52:44,462 00:52:46,362 We need all the help we can get, right? We need all the help we can get, right?
1355 00:52:46,697 00:52:48,399 Bow your heads. Bow your heads.
1356 00:52:48,999 00:52:50,777 (translated) Our Father who are in Heaven... (translated) Our Father who are in Heaven...
1357 00:52:50,801 00:52:52,837 (phone ringing) (phone ringing)
1358 00:52:52,870 00:52:53,871 Yo! Yo!
1359 00:52:53,904 00:52:54,872 What's up, dude? What's up, dude?
1360 00:52:54,905 00:52:56,907 Yeah, I'm still at work. Yeah, I'm still at work.
1361 00:52:56,941 00:52:58,075 Yeah, (chuckles). Yeah, (chuckles).
1362 00:52:58,108 00:53:00,487 No, you're not gonna believe what's going on over here. No, you're not gonna believe what's going on over here.
1363 00:53:00,511 00:53:02,313 Yeah, yeah, she's still here. Yeah, yeah, she's still here.
1364 00:53:02,347 00:53:03,248 Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
1365 00:53:03,281 00:53:04,615 No, I should probably go. No, I should probably go.
1366 00:53:04,649 00:53:05,483 I'll call you back. I'll call you back.
1367 00:53:05,516 00:53:06,817 Okay, bye. Okay, bye.
1368 00:53:08,619 00:53:09,587 Oh, sorry. Oh, sorry.
1369 00:53:09,620 00:53:10,888 Go. Go.
1370 00:53:12,323 00:53:13,867 (translated) Humbly, we come before You (translated) Humbly, we come before You
1371 00:53:13,891 00:53:15,793 and ask that You would care for us. and ask that You would care for us.
1372 00:53:15,826 00:53:18,763 May we make the best movie we can. May we make the best movie we can.
1373 00:53:18,796 00:53:20,831 And Jesus, please... And Jesus, please...
1374 00:53:20,865 00:53:24,569 May Martin Scorsese give Mr. Herman, May Martin Scorsese give Mr. Herman,
1375 00:53:24,602 00:53:26,604 the part of the Tin Man. the part of the Tin Man.
1376 00:53:26,637 00:53:28,706 In the new Wizard of Oz movie. In the new Wizard of Oz movie.
1377 00:53:29,540 00:53:30,540 Amen. Amen.
1378 00:53:30,875 00:53:31,542 Amen. Amen.
1379 00:53:31,576 00:53:32,677 Amen. Amen.
1380 00:53:32,710 00:53:34,412 Now, everyone, take your places. Now, everyone, take your places.
1381 00:53:34,445 00:53:35,613 (Miller giggles) (Miller giggles)
1382 00:53:35,646 00:53:36,914 Lights, camera, action. Lights, camera, action.
1383 00:53:36,947 00:53:38,516 So exciting. So exciting.
1384 00:53:39,317 00:53:40,518 Oh! Oh!
1385 00:53:43,554 00:53:45,756 This is your time to shine, Herman. This is your time to shine, Herman.
1386 00:53:45,790 00:53:46,991 No more small parts. No more small parts.
1387 00:53:47,024 00:53:47,825 I'm an actor. I'm an actor.
1388 00:53:47,858 00:53:48,793 You're an actor. You're an actor.
1389 00:53:48,826 00:53:50,761 Let's not use those faces. Let's not use those faces.
1390 00:53:50,795 00:53:51,962 Okay, guys. Okay, guys.
1391 00:53:51,996 00:53:55,266 I want this to have a new way kind of feel. I want this to have a new way kind of feel.
1392 00:53:55,666 00:53:59,704 Very conversational, very casual, okay? Very conversational, very casual, okay?
1393 00:54:01,506 00:54:03,908 Save your breath, Francois. Save your breath, Francois.
1394 00:54:04,642 00:54:06,411 Okay guys, everyone ready? Okay guys, everyone ready?
1395 00:54:06,444 00:54:07,044 Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
1396 00:54:07,077 00:54:08,713 And we're rolling. And we're rolling.
1397 00:54:14,051 00:54:15,420 Okay Juan, as the director, Okay Juan, as the director,
1398 00:54:15,453 00:54:17,988 would you like to say, action? would you like to say, action?
1399 00:54:18,022 00:54:20,458 (chuckles) Sorry. (chuckles) Sorry.
1400 00:54:21,826 00:54:22,693 Action! Action!
1401 00:54:22,727 00:54:26,997 (light classical music) (light classical music)
1402 00:54:27,031 00:54:28,065 Good evening. Good evening.
1403 00:54:28,098 00:54:29,734 Can I get you something to drink? Can I get you something to drink?
1404 00:54:29,767 00:54:31,536 Water please. Water please.
1405 00:54:31,569 00:54:32,913 We'll have the bottle of the Dolcetto. We'll have the bottle of the Dolcetto.
1406 00:54:32,937 00:54:34,439 Thank you. Thank you.
1407 00:54:34,472 00:54:35,640 Dolcetto? Dolcetto?
1408 00:54:35,673 00:54:36,850 Why don't I just save the glasses Why don't I just save the glasses
1409 00:54:36,874 00:54:38,519 and urinate directly into your mouth? and urinate directly into your mouth?
1410 00:54:38,543 00:54:39,076 Cut! Cut!
1411 00:54:39,109 00:54:40,511 Gregg! Gregg!
1412 00:54:40,545 00:54:42,456 You got to say what is written in the script. You got to say what is written in the script.
1413 00:54:42,480 00:54:43,047 I know. I know.
1414 00:54:43,080 00:54:44,014 I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
1415 00:54:44,048 00:54:45,716 But Dolcetto is a terrible wine But Dolcetto is a terrible wine
1416 00:54:45,750 00:54:47,361 and I do not want my restaurant on film, and I do not want my restaurant on film,
1417 00:54:47,385 00:54:49,320 serving Dolcetto. serving Dolcetto.
1418 00:54:49,354 00:54:50,564 You should choose Barolo. You should choose Barolo.
1419 00:54:50,588 00:54:51,798 Fine, I'll choose a Barolo. Fine, I'll choose a Barolo.
1420 00:54:51,822 00:54:52,757 Let's just keep going. Let's just keep going.
1421 00:54:52,790 00:54:53,924 Come on. Come on.
1422 00:54:54,592 00:54:56,627 How's my blind face look? How's my blind face look?
1423 00:54:56,661 00:54:58,329 Solid. Solid.
1424 00:54:58,363 00:54:59,997 Scarecrow. Scarecrow.
1425 00:55:01,699 00:55:02,967 Action! Action!
1426 00:55:05,536 00:55:07,638 Oh wait, you haven't ordered this yet. Oh wait, you haven't ordered this yet.
1427 00:55:07,672 00:55:10,508 Ah, I'm a psychic! (laughs) Ah, I'm a psychic! (laughs)
1428 00:55:10,541 00:55:11,909 Dionne Warwick! Dionne Warwick!
1429 00:55:11,942 00:55:13,778 Oh wait, is she dead? Oh wait, is she dead?
1430 00:55:13,811 00:55:14,812 I don't know. I don't know.
1431 00:55:14,845 00:55:17,682 We're still rolling. We're still rolling.
1432 00:55:17,715 00:55:18,883 Action. Action.
1433 00:55:18,916 00:55:20,050 Shit show. Shit show.
1434 00:55:20,951 00:55:21,986 Good evening. Good evening.
1435 00:55:22,019 00:55:23,364 Can I get you something to drink? Can I get you something to drink?
1436 00:55:23,388 00:55:24,655 Water please. Water please.
1437 00:55:24,689 00:55:26,657 I'll have a bottle of the Barolo. I'll have a bottle of the Barolo.
1438 00:55:26,691 00:55:27,925 Thank you. Thank you.
1439 00:55:28,393 00:55:29,727 Barolo? Barolo?
1440 00:55:29,760 00:55:31,462 What a fine choice you've made What a fine choice you've made
1441 00:55:31,496 00:55:34,532 here at Vareli on 111th in Broadway here at Vareli on 111th in Broadway
1442 00:55:34,565 00:55:35,766 in Manhattan. in Manhattan.
1443 00:55:35,800 00:55:37,034 Gregg! Gregg!
1444 00:55:40,671 00:55:41,772 Oh, Tin Man. Oh, Tin Man.
1445 00:55:41,806 00:55:43,408 I'm so thankful for you. I'm so thankful for you.
1446 00:55:43,441 00:55:46,477 Ever since that wicked witch cast that nasty spell on me, Ever since that wicked witch cast that nasty spell on me,
1447 00:55:46,511 00:55:48,413 I felt so helpless. I felt so helpless.
1448 00:55:48,679 00:55:50,824 Dorothy, taking you out for a bottle of wine Dorothy, taking you out for a bottle of wine
1449 00:55:50,848 00:55:52,383 is the least I could do is the least I could do
1450 00:55:52,417 00:55:55,085 to help you forget about your temporary blindness. to help you forget about your temporary blindness.
1451 00:55:58,155 00:55:59,690 Barolo. Barolo.
1452 00:56:01,759 00:56:02,793 Just Just
1453 00:56:15,940 00:56:17,074 Oh! Oh!
1454 00:56:20,811 00:56:23,981 (gasps) I can hear it pouring! (gasps) I can hear it pouring!
1455 00:56:24,014 00:56:26,016 My other senses are so heightened now My other senses are so heightened now
1456 00:56:26,050 00:56:28,052 since I've been blind. since I've been blind.
1457 00:56:29,019 00:56:30,755 (clears throat) (clears throat)
1458 00:56:30,788 00:56:32,690 Sounds like a lot. Sounds like a lot.
1459 00:56:36,494 00:56:39,830 (clears throat) (clears throat)
1460 00:56:42,567 00:56:43,734 Cut! Cut!
1461 00:56:43,768 00:56:45,812 Gregg, could you please try pouring a little less wine, Gregg, could you please try pouring a little less wine,
1462 00:56:45,836 00:56:46,937 next time? next time?
1463 00:56:46,971 00:56:48,172 I know, I'm sorry. I know, I'm sorry.
1464 00:56:48,205 00:56:51,542 I got nervous and I did a bit of a heavy pour. I got nervous and I did a bit of a heavy pour.
1465 00:56:51,776 00:56:53,820 I'll just pour some of it back into the bottle. I'll just pour some of it back into the bottle.
1466 00:56:53,844 00:56:55,088 No, it'll spill all over the table. No, it'll spill all over the table.
1467 00:56:55,112 00:56:56,623 Just pour it out and we'll get another one. Just pour it out and we'll get another one.
1468 00:56:56,647 00:56:57,882 I will not. I will not.
1469 00:56:57,915 00:57:00,485 This is a very expensive vintage. This is a very expensive vintage.
1470 00:57:00,518 00:57:02,720 Right, we have multiple takes. Right, we have multiple takes.
1471 00:57:02,953 00:57:05,055 Maybe we can use this. Maybe we can use this.
1472 00:57:05,089 00:57:07,124 Okay, you know what? Okay, you know what?
1473 00:57:13,097 00:57:14,097 Holy Holy
1474 00:57:14,532 00:57:16,133 crap! crap!
1475 00:57:22,540 00:57:23,040 Nice. Nice.
1476 00:57:23,073 00:57:24,575 It's dry. It's dry.
1477 00:57:28,112 00:57:29,514 Here we are. Here we are.
1478 00:57:29,547 00:57:30,748 Problem solved. Problem solved.
1479 00:57:30,781 00:57:32,149 Moving on. Moving on.
1480 00:57:32,517 00:57:34,585 Yeah, but don't we need a shot of Gregg Yeah, but don't we need a shot of Gregg
1481 00:57:34,619 00:57:35,720 pouring the wine? pouring the wine?
1482 00:57:35,753 00:57:37,988 I'll fix it in post. I'll fix it in post.
1483 00:57:41,859 00:57:43,728 And rolling. And rolling.
1484 00:57:45,095 00:57:46,564 Action! Action!
1485 00:57:46,597 00:57:47,674 I remember when you were just I remember when you were just
1486 00:57:47,698 00:57:49,233 a girl from Kansas. a girl from Kansas.
1487 00:57:49,266 00:57:51,769 Oh, you make me sound so plain. Oh, you make me sound so plain.
1488 00:57:51,802 00:57:53,571 But you're a woman now. But you're a woman now.
1489 00:57:53,604 00:57:54,839 With needs. With needs.
1490 00:57:55,239 00:57:56,874 Tin Man. Tin Man.
1491 00:57:56,907 00:57:58,676 What are you getting at? What are you getting at?
1492 00:57:58,709 00:58:00,110 We're best friends. We're best friends.
1493 00:58:00,144 00:58:01,712 The dreaded f-bomb. The dreaded f-bomb.
1494 00:58:01,746 00:58:02,923 How could such a little word How could such a little word
1495 00:58:02,947 00:58:04,982 have such big impact? have such big impact?
1496 00:58:08,586 00:58:10,821 I got something for you to read. I got something for you to read.
1497 00:58:18,629 00:58:20,097 (gasps) (gasps)
1498 00:58:22,767 00:58:24,769 Do you really mean that? Do you really mean that?
1499 00:58:24,802 00:58:27,304 With all my newly acquired heart. With all my newly acquired heart.
1500 00:58:27,337 00:58:29,940 I can't stop thinking about you. I can't stop thinking about you.
1501 00:58:29,974 00:58:31,876 You don't know what you're saying. You don't know what you're saying.
1502 00:58:31,909 00:58:33,711 I know life's tough for you, Dorothy. I know life's tough for you, Dorothy.
1503 00:58:33,744 00:58:35,179 It's tough for me too. It's tough for me too.
1504 00:58:35,212 00:58:36,113 But with your height and my eyes, But with your height and my eyes,
1505 00:58:36,146 00:58:38,015 we make a damn good team. we make a damn good team.
1506 00:58:38,048 00:58:39,216 It's just It's just
1507 00:58:39,249 00:58:40,184 If there's any hope that we might make If there's any hope that we might make
1508 00:58:40,217 00:58:42,128 this work, putting that friendship on the line this work, putting that friendship on the line
1509 00:58:42,152 00:58:43,888 is totally worth it. is totally worth it.
1510 00:58:44,722 00:58:45,832 You took the easy way out You took the easy way out
1511 00:58:45,856 00:58:47,992 by putting it on a card. by putting it on a card.
1512 00:58:48,726 00:58:50,995 Are you Tin Man enough to say it? Are you Tin Man enough to say it?
1513 00:58:53,698 00:58:54,698 I love you. I love you.
1514 00:58:54,965 00:58:56,133 (gasps) (gasps)
1515 00:59:08,946 00:59:10,347 I can't reach. I can't reach.
1516 00:59:10,380 00:59:11,181 What? What?
1517 00:59:11,215 00:59:12,750 I can't reach. I can't reach.
1518 00:59:12,783 00:59:13,684 Cut! Cut!
1519 00:59:13,718 00:59:16,353 Wah, wah, wah. (laughs) Wah, wah, wah. (laughs)
1520 00:59:16,386 00:59:18,355 Oh man, back to one. Oh man, back to one.
1521 00:59:18,388 00:59:19,757 It's okay, Mr. Herman. It's okay, Mr. Herman.
1522 00:59:19,790 00:59:22,693 We just do a close up for this shot. We just do a close up for this shot.
1523 00:59:22,727 00:59:26,096 Go ahead and slide up a little closer to her. Go ahead and slide up a little closer to her.
1524 00:59:26,130 00:59:27,130 Good. Good.
1525 00:59:28,098 00:59:29,098 Okay. Okay.
1526 00:59:29,634 00:59:31,135 Pete, soom in. Pete, soom in.
1527 00:59:32,737 00:59:33,604 Soom in? Soom in?
1528 00:59:33,638 00:59:34,605 Yeah, soom in. Yeah, soom in.
1529 00:59:34,639 00:59:35,272 Soom in. Soom in.
1530 00:59:35,305 00:59:36,607 Yeah. Yeah.
1531 00:59:37,307 00:59:39,610 You know, when you You know, when you
1532 00:59:39,644 00:59:41,211 Zoom, zoom in? Zoom, zoom in?
1533 00:59:41,245 00:59:42,046 Exactly. Exactly.
1534 00:59:42,079 00:59:43,347 Okay. Okay.
1535 00:59:43,380 00:59:44,314 Thank you, man. Thank you, man.
1536 00:59:44,348 00:59:45,850 No, thank you. No, thank you.
1537 00:59:46,283 00:59:48,118 Are you ready for this? Are you ready for this?
1538 00:59:48,152 00:59:49,954 Yeah, of course. Yeah, of course.
1539 00:59:49,987 00:59:50,955 Are you okay? Are you okay?
1540 00:59:50,988 00:59:51,756 Yeah. Yeah.
1541 00:59:51,789 00:59:52,957 I'm all right. I'm all right.
1542 00:59:52,990 00:59:54,625 Yeah, doing a great job. Yeah, doing a great job.
1543 00:59:54,859 00:59:55,860 It feels real. It feels real.
1544 00:59:57,394 00:59:58,863 Okay, Mr. Herman. Okay, Mr. Herman.
1545 00:59:58,896 01:00:02,099 When I say action, wait a few seconds When I say action, wait a few seconds
1546 01:00:02,132 01:00:04,368 and then slowly lean in. and then slowly lean in.
1547 01:00:04,401 01:00:05,736 All right. All right.
1548 01:00:05,770 01:00:06,704 Let's get this over with as soon as possible. Let's get this over with as soon as possible.
1549 01:00:06,737 01:00:08,706 Okay, we're rolling. Okay, we're rolling.
1550 01:00:09,740 01:00:10,641 And And
1551 01:00:10,675 01:00:12,076 action! action!
1552 01:00:16,847 01:00:17,982 Cut! Cut!
1553 01:00:24,722 01:00:26,156 Hey, hey! Hey, hey!
1554 01:00:26,390 01:00:27,825 Herman, stop! Herman, stop!
1555 01:00:27,858 01:00:29,193 He said cut! He said cut!
1556 01:00:29,226 01:00:31,095 The hell's wrong with you. The hell's wrong with you.
1557 01:00:31,128 01:00:32,939 Now, this whole thing is unbelievable. Now, this whole thing is unbelievable.
1558 01:00:32,963 01:00:33,998 Pete, come on. Pete, come on.
1559 01:00:34,031 01:00:34,932 No, why, why? No, why, why?
1560 01:00:34,965 01:00:36,066 I'm defending you. I'm defending you.
1561 01:00:36,100 01:00:37,277 Why do you wanna be sexually harassed Why do you wanna be sexually harassed
1562 01:00:37,301 01:00:39,704 for some audition that's not gonna go anywhere? for some audition that's not gonna go anywhere?
1563 01:00:39,737 01:00:41,247 I mean have you looked at yourself in the mirror. I mean have you looked at yourself in the mirror.
1564 01:00:41,271 01:00:42,448 Seriously, you really think Seriously, you really think
1565 01:00:42,472 01:00:44,184 that you would have a shot with Miller? that you would have a shot with Miller?
1566 01:00:44,208 01:00:45,009 You shut up! You shut up!
1567 01:00:45,042 01:00:45,876 What?! What?!
1568 01:00:45,910 01:00:46,844 Shut up! Shut up!
1569 01:00:46,877 01:00:48,713 You talking (laughs) You talking (laughs)
1570 01:00:48,746 01:00:50,691 Yeah, you are talking to me, aren't you? Yeah, you are talking to me, aren't you?
1571 01:00:50,715 01:00:51,749 Huh? Huh?
1572 01:00:51,782 01:00:53,117 You need to leave. You need to leave.
1573 01:00:53,150 01:00:54,819 All right. All right.
1574 01:00:55,085 01:00:57,354 You people all deserve each other. You people all deserve each other.
1575 01:00:57,387 01:00:59,957 Have fun with your make-belief. Have fun with your make-belief.
1576 01:00:59,990 01:01:01,458 All right, I'm done. All right, I'm done.
1577 01:01:01,491 01:01:02,693 I'm out! I'm out!
1578 01:01:02,727 01:01:04,361 Especially with you! Especially with you!
1579 01:01:06,764 01:01:07,798 You're fired! You're fired!
1580 01:01:07,832 01:01:08,699 Oh, yeah? Oh, yeah?
1581 01:01:08,733 01:01:09,867 I quit. I quit.
1582 01:01:09,900 01:01:11,135 How's that? How's that?
1583 01:01:11,368 01:01:12,368 Freaks! Freaks!
1584 01:01:27,117 01:01:28,318 Miller, I'm Miller, I'm
1585 01:01:28,352 01:01:29,119 I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.
1586 01:01:29,153 01:01:29,887 It's okay. It's okay.
1587 01:01:29,920 01:01:30,821 It's okay. It's okay.
1588 01:01:30,855 01:01:32,857 No, it's not okay. No, it's not okay.
1589 01:01:32,890 01:01:33,991 We were just acting. We were just acting.
1590 01:01:34,024 01:01:34,859 I wasn't. I wasn't.
1591 01:01:34,892 01:01:36,393 I wanted to kiss you. I wanted to kiss you.
1592 01:01:37,928 01:01:39,039 I just have to deal with the fact I just have to deal with the fact
1593 01:01:39,063 01:01:41,131 that no woman's never gonna love me. that no woman's never gonna love me.
1594 01:01:41,165 01:01:43,734 Herman, that is not true. Herman, that is not true.
1595 01:01:43,768 01:01:44,735 You're great! You're great!
1596 01:01:44,769 01:01:46,503 You're funny and charming You're funny and charming
1597 01:01:46,536 01:01:49,206 and a great listener and and a great listener and
1598 01:01:49,239 01:01:51,241 That's it, every time I walk you home, That's it, every time I walk you home,
1599 01:01:51,275 01:01:53,277 not once did you invite me in. not once did you invite me in.
1600 01:01:54,011 01:01:55,521 For the first time, Pete walks you home For the first time, Pete walks you home
1601 01:01:55,545 01:01:56,814 and he spends the night. and he spends the night.
1602 01:01:56,847 01:01:58,048 Who told you that? Who told you that?
1603 01:01:58,082 01:01:59,416 He did. He did.
1604 01:02:02,352 01:02:04,088 Well, I shouldn't have let him in. Well, I shouldn't have let him in.
1605 01:02:04,121 01:02:04,889 Why did you? Why did you?
1606 01:02:04,922 01:02:06,190 I don't know. I don't know.
1607 01:02:10,127 01:02:11,127 Herman Herman
1608 01:02:12,830 01:02:15,132 I care about you a lot. I care about you a lot.
1609 01:02:15,165 01:02:17,434 You know that, right? You know that, right?
1610 01:02:20,805 01:02:23,307 But I don't see you like that. But I don't see you like that.
1611 01:02:25,542 01:02:28,412 Not that I couldn't maybe Not that I couldn't maybe
1612 01:02:28,913 01:02:30,523 I don't know ever see you like that. I don't know ever see you like that.
1613 01:02:30,547 01:02:31,982 Come on. Come on.
1614 01:02:32,016 01:02:34,418 At least be just honest with me. At least be just honest with me.
1615 01:02:36,420 01:02:39,389 Mr. Herman, what about your audition tape? Mr. Herman, what about your audition tape?
1616 01:02:46,196 01:02:52,036 (sad music) (sad music)
1617 01:03:49,559 01:03:51,428 (knocking on door) (knocking on door)
1618 01:03:53,297 01:03:54,398 Oh, Herman. Oh, Herman.
1619 01:03:54,431 01:03:56,400 Thank God, you didn't kill yourself. Thank God, you didn't kill yourself.
1620 01:03:56,433 01:03:57,634 What are you doing here? What are you doing here?
1621 01:03:57,667 01:03:58,903 You forgot your ax. You forgot your ax.
1622 01:03:58,936 01:03:59,970 Gregg, leave. Gregg, leave.
1623 01:04:00,004 01:04:01,305 I'm going to stay. I'm going to stay.
1624 01:04:01,338 01:04:02,539 Really, Gregg? Really, Gregg?
1625 01:04:02,572 01:04:04,472 Am I interrupting something? (chuckles) Am I interrupting something? (chuckles)
1626 01:04:07,945 01:04:09,346 All right. All right.
1627 01:04:09,379 01:04:11,415 And now, you've got me as company. And now, you've got me as company.
1628 01:04:11,448 01:04:12,849 Cheers. Cheers.
1629 01:04:18,122 01:04:19,432 Man, that was really hard to watch tonight. Man, that was really hard to watch tonight.
1630 01:04:19,456 01:04:21,258 It was like a Shakespearean tragic- It was like a Shakespearean tragic-
1631 01:04:21,291 01:04:22,392 Please- Please-
1632 01:04:22,426 01:04:23,569 It's very difficult to stay on- It's very difficult to stay on-
1633 01:04:23,593 01:04:24,670 Are you trying to send me to mom? Are you trying to send me to mom?
1634 01:04:24,694 01:04:25,996 I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
1635 01:04:26,030 01:04:28,298 I'm not very good at this. I'm not very good at this.
1636 01:04:29,066 01:04:31,435 If you need time off from work, If you need time off from work,
1637 01:04:31,701 01:04:33,270 you've got it. you've got it.
1638 01:04:36,240 01:04:39,176 I think her death has finally caught up with me. I think her death has finally caught up with me.
1639 01:04:43,280 01:04:44,348 Have I told you yet Have I told you yet
1640 01:04:44,381 01:04:47,017 about my last conversation with mom? about my last conversation with mom?
1641 01:04:47,051 01:04:48,252 No. No.
1642 01:04:49,453 01:04:50,596 Well, we were talking about Well, we were talking about
1643 01:04:50,620 01:04:52,556 which Golden Girl we were which Golden Girl we were
1644 01:04:53,290 01:04:54,434 and she got really quiet. and she got really quiet.
1645 01:04:54,458 01:04:56,560 Which I thought was because I told her, Which I thought was because I told her,
1646 01:04:56,593 01:04:58,228 I'm a Blanche. I'm a Blanche.
1647 01:04:59,329 01:05:01,098 But I looked back over at her But I looked back over at her
1648 01:05:01,131 01:05:04,101 and she was signing your birthday card and she was signing your birthday card
1649 01:05:04,134 01:05:07,137 and she said, "I would give anything and she said, "I would give anything
1650 01:05:07,704 01:05:11,341 "if Herman haven't had to struggle through life." "if Herman haven't had to struggle through life."
1651 01:05:13,577 01:05:14,720 I wonder what it would be like I wonder what it would be like
1652 01:05:14,744 01:05:17,914 to have some other abnormality you know, to have some other abnormality you know,
1653 01:05:18,482 01:05:20,717 color blind or deaf in one ear color blind or deaf in one ear
1654 01:05:20,750 01:05:23,320 or have weird birthmark. or have weird birthmark.
1655 01:05:23,753 01:05:25,331 Something that people couldn't look at you Something that people couldn't look at you
1656 01:05:25,355 01:05:27,657 and judge you right off the bat. and judge you right off the bat.
1657 01:05:28,058 01:05:30,294 See you and know why you're not normal. See you and know why you're not normal.
1658 01:05:31,661 01:05:33,263 You're right. You're right.
1659 01:05:34,164 01:05:35,365 It's not fair. It's not fair.
1660 01:05:37,334 01:05:39,569 It's not fair that you can't hide It's not fair that you can't hide
1661 01:05:39,769 01:05:41,471 your uniqueness. your uniqueness.
1662 01:05:42,439 01:05:44,508 And so in that spirit, I And so in that spirit, I
1663 01:05:45,342 01:05:48,245 I have something to confess to you. I have something to confess to you.
1664 01:05:49,379 01:05:52,116 Herman, I know this might be a little bit surprising Herman, I know this might be a little bit surprising
1665 01:05:53,283 01:05:54,351 but but
1666 01:05:55,419 01:05:56,987 I'm a gay man. I'm a gay man.
1667 01:05:57,021 01:06:00,024 Oh my god, I can't believe I said it. Oh my god, I can't believe I said it.
1668 01:06:00,057 01:06:01,992 I am sorry I've never told you I am sorry I've never told you
1669 01:06:02,026 01:06:05,295 and I'm sorry I had the ability to hide it. and I'm sorry I had the ability to hide it.
1670 01:06:06,196 01:06:08,165 Sure you do. Sure you do.
1671 01:06:08,198 01:06:10,100 You know, mom You know, mom
1672 01:06:10,134 01:06:11,468 She was She was
1673 01:06:11,801 01:06:13,503 very supportive of us very supportive of us
1674 01:06:13,537 01:06:15,172 and she always supported my dream and she always supported my dream
1675 01:06:15,205 01:06:17,374 to own a restaurant. to own a restaurant.
1676 01:06:17,607 01:06:20,310 And now, she's supporting your dream And now, she's supporting your dream
1677 01:06:20,577 01:06:22,979 to be an amazing actor. to be an amazing actor.
1678 01:06:23,713 01:06:26,450 Gregg, don't try to make me cry. Gregg, don't try to make me cry.
1679 01:06:26,483 01:06:28,118 Give me a hug. Give me a hug.
1680 01:06:28,152 01:06:29,986 Good. Good.
1681 01:06:31,355 01:06:33,390 Thank you for letting me use Thank you for letting me use
1682 01:06:33,423 01:06:34,724 your restaurant. your restaurant.
1683 01:06:34,758 01:06:36,693 Of course, we're brothers. Of course, we're brothers.
1684 01:06:36,726 01:06:39,063 Half-brothers. Half-brothers.
1685 01:06:39,363 01:06:46,303 (lively music) (lively music)
1686 01:06:47,071 01:06:48,172 (knocking on door) (knocking on door)
1687 01:06:48,205 01:06:49,706 I wonder who that could be. I wonder who that could be.
1688 01:06:49,739 01:06:50,807 Right on cue. Right on cue.
1689 01:06:50,840 01:06:51,808 Hey, Tin Man. Hey, Tin Man.
1690 01:06:51,841 01:06:53,310 What? What?
1691 01:06:53,343 01:06:55,088 Mr. Herman, your dreams are not going down Mr. Herman, your dreams are not going down
1692 01:06:55,112 01:06:56,746 without a fight. without a fight.
1693 01:06:57,581 01:06:58,758 After everything we shot last night, After everything we shot last night,
1694 01:06:58,782 01:07:00,593 I'm sure we can get an audition tape together. I'm sure we can get an audition tape together.
1695 01:07:00,617 01:07:02,462 Look, I think we should take a little break Look, I think we should take a little break
1696 01:07:02,486 01:07:04,254 from my dream for a while. from my dream for a while.
1697 01:07:04,288 01:07:05,455 Herman. Herman.
1698 01:07:05,489 01:07:06,766 If you're gonna have one regret, If you're gonna have one regret,
1699 01:07:06,790 01:07:09,226 please don't let it be that you never tried. please don't let it be that you never tried.
1700 01:07:09,526 01:07:11,695 Scorsese needs to see your tape today. Scorsese needs to see your tape today.
1701 01:07:11,728 01:07:14,331 Wait a second, we can still post your audition Wait a second, we can still post your audition
1702 01:07:14,364 01:07:15,332 on JuTube. on JuTube.
1703 01:07:15,365 01:07:16,766 YouTube. YouTube.
1704 01:07:16,800 01:07:17,701 YouTube. YouTube.
1705 01:07:17,734 01:07:18,702 You You
1706 01:07:18,735 01:07:19,735 You? You?
1707 01:07:19,769 01:07:20,737 You. You.
1708 01:07:20,770 01:07:22,106 You're saying JuTube. You're saying JuTube.
1709 01:07:22,739 01:07:24,808 YouTube, I got it. YouTube, I got it.
1710 01:07:24,841 01:07:27,211 Could you please start the camera? Could you please start the camera?
1711 01:07:27,444 01:07:29,613 And Miss Miller, you know what to do. And Miss Miller, you know what to do.
1712 01:07:40,257 01:07:41,725 No, guys. No, guys.
1713 01:07:41,758 01:07:44,361 In order to guarantee that Scorsese sees this, In order to guarantee that Scorsese sees this,
1714 01:07:44,394 01:07:46,296 I gotta do it in person. I gotta do it in person.
1715 01:07:46,330 01:07:48,665 I gotta break in to Rachael Ray's studio. I gotta break in to Rachael Ray's studio.
1716 01:07:50,434 01:07:51,611 What are you, Nicholas Cage? What are you, Nicholas Cage?
1717 01:07:51,635 01:07:53,479 You're acting all kinds of crazy right now. You're acting all kinds of crazy right now.
1718 01:07:53,503 01:07:54,338 Crazy? Crazy?
1719 01:07:54,371 01:07:55,772 Gregg, look at me. Gregg, look at me.
1720 01:07:55,805 01:07:57,307 I'm Tin Man. I'm Tin Man.
1721 01:07:57,341 01:07:59,452 I've only got one chance to make this happen. I've only got one chance to make this happen.
1722 01:07:59,476 01:08:01,711 This is my opportunity to be a leading man! This is my opportunity to be a leading man!
1723 01:08:01,745 01:08:03,380 I've got to do this. I've got to do this.
1724 01:08:03,413 01:08:06,783 This is what it takes to make it in this business! This is what it takes to make it in this business!
1725 01:08:08,285 01:08:10,187 Well, what are we waiting for?! Well, what are we waiting for?!
1726 01:08:10,220 01:08:11,397 (giggles) Grab your ax, Tin Man. (giggles) Grab your ax, Tin Man.
1727 01:08:11,421 01:08:13,171 Let's get on this yellow brick road. Let's get on this yellow brick road.
1728 01:08:13,723 01:08:15,525 You think she signs autographs? You think she signs autographs?
1729 01:08:15,559 01:08:16,360 I don't know. I don't know.
1730 01:08:16,393 01:08:17,727 She seems like a bitch. She seems like a bitch.
1731 01:08:17,761 01:08:22,866 (fast paced music) (fast paced music)
1732 01:08:22,899 01:08:24,234 Taxi! Taxi!
1733 01:08:31,708 01:08:33,310 Let me guess, Emerald City? Let me guess, Emerald City?
1734 01:08:33,343 01:08:34,144 Close. Close.
1735 01:08:34,178 01:08:35,345 Rachael Ray's studio. Rachael Ray's studio.
1736 01:08:35,379 01:08:36,546 You got it. You got it.
1737 01:08:36,580 01:08:38,380 Come on [camel] cab, drive us to war. Come on [camel] cab, drive us to war.
1738 01:08:39,216 01:08:41,218 Oh, sweet Jesus. Oh, sweet Jesus.
1739 01:08:41,251 01:08:43,287 (fast paced music) (fast paced music)
1740 01:08:43,320 01:08:44,764 Is this a bad time for me to tell you guys, Is this a bad time for me to tell you guys,
1741 01:08:44,788 01:08:46,456 I get carsick? I get carsick?
1742 01:08:46,623 01:08:47,691 Yes. Yes.
1743 01:08:47,724 01:08:49,359 It's a terrible time. It's a terrible time.
1744 01:08:50,327 01:08:51,861 It's the place right there. It's the place right there.
1745 01:08:51,895 01:08:54,331 What if we get arrested? What if we get arrested?
1746 01:08:54,364 01:08:55,632 Oh, god. Oh, god.
1747 01:08:55,865 01:08:57,834 I wouldn't do well in jail. I wouldn't do well in jail.
1748 01:08:57,867 01:09:00,237 I feel like I would do well. I feel like I would do well.
1749 01:09:03,773 01:09:05,209 Hi, Marty. Hi, Marty.
1750 01:09:05,242 01:09:06,352 10 minutes until we need you 10 minutes until we need you
1751 01:09:06,376 01:09:07,753 but if you need me to grab you another but if you need me to grab you another
1752 01:09:07,777 01:09:10,414 Raging Red Bull or call a taxi driver Raging Red Bull or call a taxi driver
1753 01:09:10,447 01:09:12,282 to get you through the mean streets, to get you through the mean streets,
1754 01:09:12,316 01:09:14,584 I'm that kind of good fella. I'm that kind of good fella.
1755 01:09:14,851 01:09:16,586 I'm also a writer I'm also a writer
1756 01:09:16,786 01:09:19,956 and since you got some time on your hands, and since you got some time on your hands,
1757 01:09:19,989 01:09:22,859 I'll just, my Hotmail is at the bottom I'll just, my Hotmail is at the bottom
1758 01:09:22,892 01:09:24,828 of the page, so. of the page, so.
1759 01:09:48,785 01:09:50,254 So, guys, what's the plan? So, guys, what's the plan?
1760 01:09:50,287 01:09:51,621 Okay, I'll go in first Okay, I'll go in first
1761 01:09:51,655 01:09:53,623 and do some recon. and do some recon.
1762 01:09:53,657 01:09:54,858 Wish me luck. Wish me luck.
1763 01:09:54,891 01:09:57,494 (laughs) It's so exciting. (laughs) It's so exciting.
1764 01:10:00,830 01:10:02,999 Okay Miller, you can do this. Okay Miller, you can do this.
1765 01:10:03,032 01:10:04,834 You can seduce him. You can seduce him.
1766 01:10:04,868 01:10:06,970 You are one hot bitch. You are one hot bitch.
1767 01:10:07,003 01:10:10,274 Oh Miller, don't call yourself a bitch. Oh Miller, don't call yourself a bitch.
1768 01:10:10,307 01:10:11,775 All right, let's do this. All right, let's do this.
1769 01:10:16,646 01:10:20,016 (light jazz music) (light jazz music)
1770 01:10:20,049 01:10:21,518 Hi, there. Hi, there.
1771 01:10:22,452 01:10:23,787 Desk man. Desk man.
1772 01:10:24,388 01:10:26,022 Oh, hello there lady. Oh, hello there lady.
1773 01:10:26,055 01:10:28,258 How can I help you? How can I help you?
1774 01:10:28,792 01:10:30,427 I was just wondering I was just wondering
1775 01:10:30,460 01:10:33,897 what floor does the Rachael Ray Show tape on? what floor does the Rachael Ray Show tape on?
1776 01:10:33,930 01:10:35,365 Oh, it's five. Oh, it's five.
1777 01:10:35,399 01:10:36,566 Ohh. Ohh.
1778 01:10:36,600 01:10:38,511 But you're gonna need a special clearance on that. But you're gonna need a special clearance on that.
1779 01:10:38,535 01:10:39,669 Oh. Oh.
1780 01:10:40,904 01:10:44,308 How's this for a special clearance? How's this for a special clearance?
1781 01:10:45,041 01:10:47,511 What, um... What, um...
1782 01:10:50,414 01:10:52,882 Well, that is classified information, Well, that is classified information,
1783 01:10:52,916 01:10:55,419 which you're trying to get your hands on. which you're trying to get your hands on.
1784 01:10:55,452 01:10:56,753 (chuckles) I know something (chuckles) I know something
1785 01:10:56,786 01:10:59,356 you can get your hands on. you can get your hands on.
1786 01:10:59,389 01:11:00,324 (alarms sounding) (alarms sounding)
1787 01:11:00,357 01:11:01,425 Oh! Oh!
1788 01:11:01,458 01:11:02,668 I'm just gonna have to check that. I'm just gonna have to check that.
1789 01:11:02,692 01:11:05,595 Can't you just look back here for it? Can't you just look back here for it?
1790 01:11:06,496 01:11:07,631 Just you know... Just you know...
1791 01:11:08,765 01:11:10,033 Do me a little favor Do me a little favor
1792 01:11:10,066 01:11:12,402 and just stay here for a few moments and just stay here for a few moments
1793 01:11:12,436 01:11:14,504 and I'll just take care of this emergency. and I'll just take care of this emergency.
1794 01:11:14,538 01:11:16,340 But I- But I-
1795 01:11:16,373 01:11:22,011 (alarms sounding) (alarms sounding)
1796 01:11:22,045 01:11:22,912 Go! Go!
1797 01:11:22,946 01:11:24,548 Save yourselves! Save yourselves!
1798 01:11:24,581 01:11:25,891 Come on, you need a pass, let's go. Come on, you need a pass, let's go.
1799 01:11:25,915 01:11:27,884 I surrender! (cries) I surrender! (cries)
1800 01:11:29,519 01:11:31,355 Do with me what you want. Do with me what you want.
1801 01:11:31,388 01:11:32,055 Just sign it. Just sign it.
1802 01:11:32,088 01:11:32,822 Just get up. Just get up.
1803 01:11:32,856 01:11:33,957 Okay, come on. Okay, come on.
1804 01:11:33,990 01:11:34,691 Everything is just all right. Everything is just all right.
1805 01:11:34,724 01:11:35,459 Okay. Okay.
1806 01:11:35,492 01:11:36,860 I don't have ID. I don't have ID.
1807 01:11:36,893 01:11:43,933 (alarms sounding) (alarms sounding)
1808 01:11:46,370 01:11:47,613 What the hell are you doing?! What the hell are you doing?!
1809 01:11:47,637 01:11:49,406 Hey, what are you doing?! Hey, what are you doing?!
1810 01:11:49,439 01:11:52,509 (both shouting) (both shouting)
1811 01:11:59,082 01:12:00,684 (sighs) (sighs)
1812 01:12:06,590 01:12:07,691 Okay. Okay.
1813 01:12:14,431 01:12:16,400 So, we got Dorothy, So, we got Dorothy,
1814 01:12:16,433 01:12:18,402 Scarecrow Scarecrow
1815 01:12:18,435 01:12:20,103 and the Lion. and the Lion.
1816 01:12:21,538 01:12:24,441 Boys, we got a Tin Man on the loose. Boys, we got a Tin Man on the loose.
1817 01:12:24,474 01:12:31,615 (lively music) (lively music)
1818 01:12:43,026 01:12:44,794 Where am I? Where am I?
1819 01:12:45,762 01:12:47,397 Hi, Rach, five minutes Hi, Rach, five minutes
1820 01:12:47,431 01:12:49,008 and I think that Marty's gonna freak out and I think that Marty's gonna freak out
1821 01:12:49,032 01:12:52,068 when you put your meatballs in his mouth. (chuckles) when you put your meatballs in his mouth. (chuckles)
1822 01:12:57,941 01:13:00,477 (Herman screams) (Herman screams)
1823 01:13:00,510 01:13:01,911 Get him! Get him!
1824 01:13:08,184 01:13:10,720 Marty, it's show time. Marty, it's show time.
1825 01:13:14,558 01:13:15,158 That one is wet. That one is wet.
1826 01:13:15,191 01:13:16,493 You can go around that. You can go around that.
1827 01:13:16,526 01:13:17,026 All right. All right.
1828 01:13:17,060 01:13:18,061 Fair enough. Fair enough.
1829 01:13:18,094 01:13:19,663 There he is! There he is!
1830 01:13:19,696 01:13:21,465 Shit, it's Tin Man! Shit, it's Tin Man!
1831 01:13:30,607 01:13:32,876 Right this way, Mr. Scorsese. Right this way, Mr. Scorsese.
1832 01:13:32,909 01:13:36,980 (lively music) (lively music)
1833 01:13:45,088 01:13:47,724 I wanna be your Tin Man. I wanna be your Tin Man.
1834 01:13:47,757 01:13:49,459 Come in, Jimmy. Come in, Jimmy.
1835 01:13:49,493 01:13:50,093 Yeah, Ralph. Yeah, Ralph.
1836 01:13:50,126 01:13:51,027 Go ahead. Go ahead.
1837 01:13:51,060 01:13:52,529 I just talked to Marty. I just talked to Marty.
1838 01:13:52,562 01:13:54,106 He said the little Tin Man was with him. He said the little Tin Man was with him.
1839 01:13:54,130 01:13:55,665 So, he's clear? So, he's clear?
1840 01:13:55,699 01:13:57,009 What do you want me to do with these guys? What do you want me to do with these guys?
1841 01:13:57,033 01:13:58,234 I don't know. I don't know.
1842 01:13:58,267 01:14:00,236 Release them I guess? Release them I guess?
1843 01:14:00,269 01:14:01,705 Oh, Ralphy. Oh, Ralphy.
1844 01:14:01,738 01:14:03,507 You're no fun. You're no fun.
1845 01:14:03,540 01:14:05,775 Uh, tell them to wait outside. Uh, tell them to wait outside.
1846 01:14:06,275 01:14:08,745 Yeah, tell them to wait outside. Yeah, tell them to wait outside.
1847 01:14:09,946 01:14:10,680 Over. Over.
1848 01:14:10,714 01:14:11,848 10-4. 10-4.
1849 01:14:14,117 01:14:16,185 All right, my pretties. All right, my pretties.
1850 01:14:16,219 01:14:17,621 You can go. You can go.
1851 01:14:17,887 01:14:20,189 There's no place like home. There's no place like home.
1852 01:14:20,590 01:14:22,101 Ugh, I can't believe I showed him Ugh, I can't believe I showed him
1853 01:14:22,125 01:14:24,193 the top of my cleave. the top of my cleave.
1854 01:14:24,227 01:14:25,729 I've done worst for less. I've done worst for less.
1855 01:14:25,762 01:14:27,096 (sighs) (sighs)
1856 01:14:30,033 01:14:31,033 Well? Well?
1857 01:14:33,970 01:14:36,773 I didn't get the Tin Man. I didn't get the Tin Man.
1858 01:14:38,307 01:14:39,609 That hack. That hack.
1859 01:14:39,643 01:14:41,020 What the hell does Martin Scorsese know What the hell does Martin Scorsese know
1860 01:14:41,044 01:14:42,111 about movie-making? about movie-making?
1861 01:14:42,145 01:14:44,681 Don't feel sorry for me. Don't feel sorry for me.
1862 01:14:44,714 01:14:45,682 Gregg, I'm gonna need someone Gregg, I'm gonna need someone
1863 01:14:45,715 01:14:47,517 to cover my shift next week. to cover my shift next week.
1864 01:14:47,551 01:14:48,728 Of course, you need a vacation. Of course, you need a vacation.
1865 01:14:48,752 01:14:49,919 You take it. You take it.
1866 01:14:52,188 01:14:53,899 I think I'm gonna get some sun in LA. I think I'm gonna get some sun in LA.
1867 01:14:53,923 01:14:55,659 Wait, what? Wait, what?
1868 01:14:55,692 01:14:57,069 Martin asked me to come audition Martin asked me to come audition
1869 01:14:57,093 01:14:58,294 for the Wizard. for the Wizard.
1870 01:14:58,327 01:14:59,896 Herman! Herman!
1871 01:14:59,929 01:15:01,865 I'm so proud of you! I'm so proud of you!
1872 01:15:01,898 01:15:05,602 (lively music) (lively music)
1873 01:15:05,635 01:15:07,771 You really did it, my friend. You really did it, my friend.
1874 01:15:07,804 01:15:09,105 Oh, my brother Oh, my brother
1875 01:15:09,138 01:15:12,275 is gonna be the wonderful Wizard of Oz! (laughs) is gonna be the wonderful Wizard of Oz! (laughs)
1876 01:15:12,308 01:15:15,845 (everyone laughing) (everyone laughing)
1877 01:15:39,102 01:15:42,138 (phone ringing) (phone ringing)
1878 01:15:44,173 01:15:44,941 Hello? Hello?
1879 01:15:44,974 01:15:46,109 Herman, baby. Herman, baby.
1880 01:15:46,142 01:15:48,053 If you are standing, you better sit down If you are standing, you better sit down
1881 01:15:48,077 01:15:50,814 because I got the role of a lifetime for you. because I got the role of a lifetime for you.
1882 01:15:50,847 01:15:52,357 Tostitos is looking for a little person Tostitos is looking for a little person
1883 01:15:52,381 01:15:54,217 to be the new face of their everyday to be the new face of their everyday
1884 01:15:54,250 01:15:55,952 Cinco de Mayo campaign. Cinco de Mayo campaign.
1885 01:15:55,985 01:15:57,763 They wanna put you on a deserted island. They wanna put you on a deserted island.
1886 01:15:57,787 01:15:59,322 Dress you up in a sombrero, Dress you up in a sombrero,
1887 01:15:59,355 01:16:00,657 give you some maracas give you some maracas
1888 01:16:00,690 01:16:03,593 and let babes in bikinis eat pico de Gallo and let babes in bikinis eat pico de Gallo
1889 01:16:03,627 01:16:04,761 off your little head. off your little head.
1890 01:16:04,794 01:16:05,829 Need I say more? Need I say more?
1891 01:16:05,862 01:16:06,663 Sorry, Tyrone. Sorry, Tyrone.
1892 01:16:06,696 01:16:08,064 I'm not interested. I'm not interested.
1893 01:16:08,097 01:16:09,897 What, you got something better to do? What, you got something better to do?
1894 01:16:10,233 01:16:11,601 Yeah, I do. Yeah, I do.
1895 01:16:13,302 01:16:17,841 (light guitar music) (light guitar music)
1896 01:16:17,874 01:16:25,874 (Gregg humming) (Gregg humming)
1897 01:16:32,856 01:16:35,191 ♪ (lyrics) Oh, Herman ♪ (lyrics) Oh, Herman
1898 01:16:35,224 01:16:37,193 Oh, oh, moment alone, Oh, oh, moment alone,
1899 01:16:37,226 01:16:41,831 Gonna be the Wizard Herman oh, oh Gonna be the Wizard Herman oh, oh
1900 01:16:41,865 01:16:46,169 Living your dreams ♪ Living your dreams ♪
1901 01:16:48,705 01:16:50,006 Something like that. Something like that.
1902 01:16:52,108 01:16:57,947 (light guitar music) (light guitar music)
1903 01:17:31,280 01:17:32,849 Hey, you! Hey, you!
1904 01:17:32,882 01:17:35,118 You wanna walk me home? You wanna walk me home?
1905 01:17:35,151 01:17:36,319 Of all the excitement, Of all the excitement,
1906 01:17:36,352 01:17:38,955 I forgot to tell you about my big news. I forgot to tell you about my big news.
1907 01:17:38,988 01:17:40,757 I have an audition tomorrow I have an audition tomorrow
1908 01:17:40,790 01:17:43,026 that I am going to. that I am going to.
1909 01:17:43,292 01:17:44,804 I'm glad to hear you didn't come to the city I'm glad to hear you didn't come to the city
1910 01:17:44,828 01:17:46,863 just to wait tables all your life. just to wait tables all your life.
1911 01:17:46,896 01:17:48,397 What's it for? What's it for?
1912 01:17:48,765 01:17:50,142 Apparently, George Lucas is retaking Apparently, George Lucas is retaking
1913 01:17:50,166 01:17:51,801 Gone with the Wind. Gone with the Wind.
1914 01:17:52,201 01:17:54,037 Wow, there is nothing sacred. Wow, there is nothing sacred.
1915 01:17:54,070 01:17:54,971 (chuckles) I'm kidding. (chuckles) I'm kidding.
1916 01:17:55,004 01:17:56,405 It's a taco commercial It's a taco commercial
1917 01:17:56,439 01:17:57,741 but I said on my resume, but I said on my resume,
1918 01:17:57,774 01:18:00,209 I could do a kick ass Spanish accent. I could do a kick ass Spanish accent.
1919 01:18:00,243 01:18:02,245 I would kill to hear that. I would kill to hear that.
1920 01:18:02,278 01:18:04,313 Herman, you could put your audition Herman, you could put your audition
1921 01:18:04,347 01:18:07,751 on the Jutube. (laughs) on the Jutube. (laughs)
1922 01:18:08,217 01:18:09,786 You shouldn't ever do that You shouldn't ever do that
1923 01:18:09,819 01:18:11,988 in front of Juan. (Miller laughs) in front of Juan. (Miller laughs)
1924 01:18:12,021 01:18:14,123 Just a little unsolicited advice Just a little unsolicited advice
1925 01:18:14,157 01:18:16,860 from your acting coach and your friend. from your acting coach and your friend.
1926 01:18:16,893 01:18:18,294 Friend? Friend?
1927 01:18:19,262 01:18:20,129 Wow. Wow.
1928 01:18:20,163 01:18:21,206 You just dropped the f-bomb. You just dropped the f-bomb.
1929 01:18:21,230 01:18:22,999 What's going on with you? What's going on with you?
1930 01:18:23,032 01:18:23,833 I'm leaving New York. I'm leaving New York.
1931 01:18:23,867 01:18:25,101 I know. I know.
1932 01:18:25,134 01:18:26,770 Permanently. Permanently.
1933 01:18:28,471 01:18:30,073 What? What?
1934 01:18:30,539 01:18:32,842 Miller, I finally got a legitimate job Miller, I finally got a legitimate job
1935 01:18:32,876 01:18:36,012 to go to LA and regardless of what happens, to go to LA and regardless of what happens,
1936 01:18:36,212 01:18:37,881 I'm gonna stay. I'm gonna stay.
1937 01:18:39,883 01:18:41,150 Okay. Okay.
1938 01:18:42,118 01:18:44,754 Well, when you make it big Well, when you make it big
1939 01:18:44,788 01:18:46,890 don't forget about us, little people. don't forget about us, little people.
1940 01:18:54,798 01:18:55,798 Well, Well,
1941 01:18:58,267 01:18:59,317 goodnight. (chuckles) goodnight. (chuckles)
1942 01:19:00,003 01:19:01,337 Goodnight. Goodnight.
1943 01:19:01,370 01:19:03,039 High five! High five!
1944 01:19:04,941 01:19:06,075 (chuckles) (chuckles)
1945 01:19:06,109 01:19:07,286 Why do you wear those shoes? Why do you wear those shoes?
1946 01:19:07,310 01:19:09,112 They elongate my legs. They elongate my legs.
1947 01:19:09,145 01:19:11,915 You're still lying to yourself. You're still lying to yourself.
1948 01:19:20,289 01:19:23,793 (cries) I'm gonna miss you so much. (cries) I'm gonna miss you so much.
1949 01:19:23,827 01:19:25,895 I'll miss you too. I'll miss you too.
1950 01:19:33,870 01:19:35,438 Herman! Herman!
1951 01:19:38,007 01:19:41,477 You wanna come inside and help me with my accent? You wanna come inside and help me with my accent?
1952 01:19:43,179 01:19:46,115 Not tonight, I'm gonna keep walking. Not tonight, I'm gonna keep walking.
1953 01:20:07,904 01:20:15,904 (easy listening alternative music) (easy listening alternative music)
1954 01:20:17,947 01:20:25,947 (easy listening alternative music) (easy listening alternative music)