# Start End Original Translated
1 00:00:00,534 00:00:02,703 [theme music] [theme music]
2 00:00:20,788 00:00:22,090 [ship horn honking] [ship horn honking]
3 00:00:24,725 00:00:27,328 By Jove, it will be jolly old good By Jove, it will be jolly old good
4 00:00:27,395 00:00:29,530 to see jolly old England again. to see jolly old England again.
5 00:00:29,597 00:00:32,666 You're so right. Jolly old England. You're so right. Jolly old England.
6 00:00:32,733 00:00:34,768 Land of the immortal bard. Land of the immortal bard.
7 00:00:34,835 00:00:36,570 'Shakespeare, even.' 'Shakespeare, even.'
8 00:00:36,637 00:00:39,507 By George! Aren't you a beastly lion? By George! Aren't you a beastly lion?
9 00:00:39,573 00:00:40,808 Indubitably. Indubitably.
10 00:00:40,874 00:00:43,477 I'm also a beastly stowaway. I'm also a beastly stowaway.
11 00:00:43,544 00:00:45,045 Mind terribly? Mind terribly?
12 00:00:45,113 00:00:47,115 Oh, stowaways I don't mind. Oh, stowaways I don't mind.
13 00:00:47,181 00:00:49,817 But lions I do! Help! But lions I do! Help!
14 00:00:49,883 00:00:52,953 There's a jolly old beastly lion aboard! There's a jolly old beastly lion aboard!
15 00:00:53,020 00:00:55,989 Exit overboard, stage left! Exit overboard, stage left!
16 00:00:56,056 00:00:57,125 splash splash
17 00:00:57,191 00:01:00,294 Land of Dickens, here I come. Land of Dickens, here I come.
18 00:01:02,029 00:01:03,197 [teeth chattering] [teeth chattering]
19 00:01:03,264 00:01:04,932 Heavens to Murgatroyd! Heavens to Murgatroyd!
20 00:01:04,998 00:01:07,468 I'm freezin' for a hot plum puddin'. I'm freezin' for a hot plum puddin'.
21 00:01:07,535 00:01:09,770 Or an old plum crumpet, even. Or an old plum crumpet, even.
22 00:01:09,837 00:01:11,739 [teeth chattering] [teeth chattering]
23 00:01:11,805 00:01:13,407 Bodkins and Zounds! Bodkins and Zounds!
24 00:01:13,474 00:01:17,378 'A castle, wherein which lies comfort and sustenance.' 'A castle, wherein which lies comfort and sustenance.'
25 00:01:17,445 00:01:20,080 Perhaps I can even get a handout. Perhaps I can even get a handout.
26 00:01:21,415 00:01:22,516 Ha ha ha! Hee hee hee! Ha ha ha! Hee hee hee!
27 00:01:22,583 00:01:24,785 Hey, Harem, here, take a look. Hey, Harem, here, take a look.
28 00:01:24,852 00:01:26,820 - What is it, Scarem? - Hee hee hee! - What is it, Scarem? - Hee hee hee!
29 00:01:26,887 00:01:28,922 There's a live one coming! There's a live one coming!
30 00:01:28,989 00:01:31,359 Oh, goody, goody, goody! Oh, goody, goody, goody!
31 00:01:31,425 00:01:32,860 We haven't had one of those We haven't had one of those
32 00:01:32,926 00:01:34,495 in 900 years, you know. in 900 years, you know.
33 00:01:34,562 00:01:38,098 [chuckles] And the live ones are the best kind! Hee hee! [chuckles] And the live ones are the best kind! Hee hee!
34 00:01:38,166 00:01:39,867 Should I let him in, milord? Should I let him in, milord?
35 00:01:39,933 00:01:41,735 By all means, Jives. By all means, Jives.
36 00:01:41,802 00:01:43,471 [clatters] [clatters]
37 00:01:43,537 00:01:45,573 Ha ha ha! Ho ho ho! Ha ha ha! Ho ho ho!
38 00:01:45,639 00:01:46,640 Hee hee hee hee! Hee hee hee hee!
39 00:01:46,707 00:01:47,741 thud thud thud thud thud thud
40 00:01:47,808 00:01:51,145 What ho...and yikes away in there! What ho...and yikes away in there!
41 00:01:51,212 00:01:54,315 A weary traveler wouldst partake of shelter A weary traveler wouldst partake of shelter
42 00:01:54,382 00:01:57,050 and some Worcestercester- cestershire puddin'. and some Worcestercester- cestershire puddin'.
43 00:01:57,117 00:01:58,319 [hinges grating] [hinges grating]
44 00:01:58,386 00:02:00,521 (Harem) 'Won't you come in, sir?' (Harem) 'Won't you come in, sir?'
45 00:02:00,588 00:02:02,690 That was the general idea. That was the general idea.
46 00:02:02,756 00:02:05,526 Prepare me some tiffin, medium-rare Prepare me some tiffin, medium-rare
47 00:02:05,593 00:02:08,862 and inform your majesty I'm here. and inform your majesty I'm here.
48 00:02:08,929 00:02:10,198 Very good, sir. Very good, sir.
49 00:02:10,264 00:02:11,832 [clatters] [clatters]
50 00:02:11,899 00:02:12,866 pop pop
51 00:02:12,933 00:02:14,235 I must be overtired. I must be overtired.
52 00:02:14,302 00:02:16,537 - Fatigued, even. - 'Hee hee hee!' - Fatigued, even. - 'Hee hee hee!'
53 00:02:16,604 00:02:19,207 (Scarem) 'Welcome to creeping shire castle.' (Scarem) 'Welcome to creeping shire castle.'
54 00:02:19,273 00:02:21,242 I'm lord Spineshivers. I'm lord Spineshivers.
55 00:02:21,309 00:02:23,377 Alack-a-day to you, m'lord. Alack-a-day to you, m'lord.
56 00:02:23,444 00:02:25,179 You have a light touch. You have a light touch.
57 00:02:25,246 00:02:26,680 pop pop
58 00:02:26,747 00:02:28,282 Huh? Huh?
59 00:02:28,349 00:02:31,051 You must be tired and hungry. You must be tired and hungry.
60 00:02:31,118 00:02:34,154 I'm somethin', that's for sure. I'm somethin', that's for sure.
61 00:02:34,222 00:02:35,189 screeching screeching
62 00:02:35,256 00:02:36,290 Dinner is served! Dinner is served!
63 00:02:36,357 00:02:38,158 Splendid, Jives. Splendid, Jives.
64 00:02:38,226 00:02:39,860 Will you walk this way? Will you walk this way?
65 00:02:41,262 00:02:42,730 Walk that way? Walk that way?
66 00:02:42,796 00:02:46,734 If I do, I'd break a clavicle or somethin'. If I do, I'd break a clavicle or somethin'.
67 00:02:48,269 00:02:49,503 Hee hee hee! Mmm! Hee hee hee! Mmm!
68 00:02:49,570 00:02:52,273 Doesn't that food smell delicious? Doesn't that food smell delicious?
69 00:02:52,340 00:02:54,775 - Food? What food? - 'Heh heh heh!' - Food? What food? - 'Heh heh heh!'
70 00:02:54,842 00:02:57,978 'Why, that chutney venison in your plate.' 'Why, that chutney venison in your plate.'
71 00:02:58,045 00:02:59,480 Will you carve, please? Will you carve, please?
72 00:02:59,547 00:03:02,950 Why not? I can go along with a gag. Why not? I can go along with a gag.
73 00:03:03,016 00:03:04,452 What'll it be, your lordship? What'll it be, your lordship?
74 00:03:04,518 00:03:06,854 Light meat or dark meat? Light meat or dark meat?
75 00:03:06,920 00:03:10,190 Heh heh heh! Oh, a rib or two will do. Heh heh heh! Oh, a rib or two will do.
76 00:03:10,258 00:03:12,125 * Oh a rib or two will do * * Oh a rib or two will do *
77 00:03:12,192 00:03:14,094 * A rib or two will do * * A rib or two will do *
78 00:03:14,161 00:03:15,463 * I can take a rib * * I can take a rib *
79 00:03:15,529 00:03:18,131 * 'N' also dish one out to you ** * 'N' also dish one out to you **
80 00:03:18,198 00:03:20,934 [squeaking] [squeaking]
81 00:03:21,001 00:03:22,270 (Harem) 'Ouch!' (Harem) 'Ouch!'
82 00:03:22,336 00:03:23,371 Who said that? Who said that?
83 00:03:23,437 00:03:25,873 Who said that? Who said that?
84 00:03:25,939 00:03:26,907 Idid! Idid!
85 00:03:26,974 00:03:29,777 Watch it, guv'nor! Watch it! Watch it, guv'nor! Watch it!
86 00:03:31,512 00:03:33,347 Heavens to meat sauce! Heavens to meat sauce!
87 00:03:33,414 00:03:35,283 I'm havin' hallucinations. I'm havin' hallucinations.
88 00:03:35,349 00:03:37,451 With complications, even. With complications, even.
89 00:03:38,886 00:03:42,256 Heh heh heh! Try some of this hot buttered cider. Heh heh heh! Try some of this hot buttered cider.
90 00:03:42,323 00:03:45,058 It's just the thing for hallucinations. It's just the thing for hallucinations.
91 00:03:45,125 00:03:47,895 - Here. - Thanks. Largely. - Here. - Thanks. Largely.
92 00:03:47,961 00:03:51,399 'Ha ha! Look out! You'll drop the glass!' 'Ha ha! Look out! You'll drop the glass!'
93 00:03:51,465 00:03:53,200 What glass? What glass?
94 00:03:53,267 00:03:54,735 [glass shattering] [glass shattering]
95 00:03:54,802 00:03:58,672 I distinctively heard the tinkle of breakin' glass. I distinctively heard the tinkle of breakin' glass.
96 00:03:58,739 00:04:02,109 And yet I saw no glass, but I heard the tinkle. And yet I saw no glass, but I heard the tinkle.
97 00:04:02,175 00:04:06,514 [chuckles] Perhaps you'd like to go to your room and rest. [chuckles] Perhaps you'd like to go to your room and rest.
98 00:04:06,580 00:04:09,717 You can perhaps that again, buster. You can perhaps that again, buster.
99 00:04:09,783 00:04:10,718 Your lordship! Your lordship!
100 00:04:10,784 00:04:13,421 His majesty the king approacheth! His majesty the king approacheth!
101 00:04:13,487 00:04:15,188 Hee hee hee! The king? Hee hee hee! The king?
102 00:04:15,255 00:04:16,590 What does he want? What does he want?
103 00:04:16,657 00:04:18,492 I can tell you one thing. I can tell you one thing.
104 00:04:18,559 00:04:21,529 He ain't gonna get much to eat in this place. He ain't gonna get much to eat in this place.
105 00:04:21,595 00:04:24,932 He's lookin' for his enemy. Sir Guy of Goon! He's lookin' for his enemy. Sir Guy of Goon!
106 00:04:24,998 00:04:27,601 Hee hee hee! Sir Guy of Goon? Hee hee hee! Sir Guy of Goon?
107 00:04:27,668 00:04:29,603 Uh-oh! Uh-oh!
108 00:04:29,670 00:04:32,205 (Snagglepuss) 'Hey, shorty.' (Snagglepuss) 'Hey, shorty.'
109 00:04:32,272 00:04:34,241 Who is this Sir Guy of Goon Who is this Sir Guy of Goon
110 00:04:34,308 00:04:36,810 may I perchance enquire? may I perchance enquire?
111 00:04:36,877 00:04:38,245 He's a villainous knight He's a villainous knight
112 00:04:38,312 00:04:41,148 whose sharp axe spares no one. whose sharp axe spares no one.
113 00:04:41,214 00:04:42,450 Oooh, hoo hoo hoo! Oooh, hoo hoo hoo!
114 00:04:42,516 00:04:44,818 Exit, Old English style Exit, Old English style
115 00:04:44,885 00:04:46,153 stage left. stage left.
116 00:04:46,219 00:04:48,021 [clatters] [clatters]
117 00:04:48,088 00:04:52,259 I guess I'm not Old English stylish enough to do it. I guess I'm not Old English stylish enough to do it.
118 00:04:52,326 00:04:54,828 Here comes his royal majesty now. Here comes his royal majesty now.
119 00:04:54,895 00:04:57,064 'Make way for the king!' 'Make way for the king!'
120 00:04:57,130 00:04:59,667 [drum roll] [drum roll]
121 00:04:59,733 00:05:03,937 Ha ha ha hee hee! Where's my archenemy, Sir Guy of Goon? Ha ha ha hee hee! Where's my archenemy, Sir Guy of Goon?
122 00:05:04,004 00:05:07,007 Here's the wretched knave, your majesty. Here's the wretched knave, your majesty.
123 00:05:07,074 00:05:09,443 Who? Me? Who? Me?
124 00:05:09,510 00:05:12,513 Yes, you...Sir Guy of Goon Yes, you...Sir Guy of Goon
125 00:05:12,580 00:05:14,548 my archenemy! my archenemy!
126 00:05:15,148 00:05:16,249 screeching screeching
127 00:05:16,316 00:05:17,651 Hold it! Hold it!
128 00:05:17,718 00:05:19,853 You're majestically mistaken. You're majestically mistaken.
129 00:05:19,920 00:05:23,757 I am Snagglepuss, friendly tourist. I am Snagglepuss, friendly tourist.
130 00:05:23,824 00:05:24,592 clang clang
131 00:05:24,658 00:05:26,394 Come back, knave! Come back, knave!
132 00:05:27,327 00:05:28,696 screeching screeching
133 00:05:28,762 00:05:31,532 Say...what're you tryin' to do Say...what're you tryin' to do
134 00:05:31,599 00:05:34,067 part my hair down the middle all the way? part my hair down the middle all the way?
135 00:05:34,134 00:05:35,669 Ruin the tourist trade? Ruin the tourist trade?
136 00:05:35,736 00:05:38,472 'Cause an international incident? Hmm, hmm, hmm? 'Cause an international incident? Hmm, hmm, hmm?
137 00:05:38,539 00:05:41,341 How 'bout it if I went to 10 Downin' Street How 'bout it if I went to 10 Downin' Street
138 00:05:41,409 00:05:43,210 and lodged a complaint? and lodged a complaint?
139 00:05:43,276 00:05:45,245 11 Upping Street, even? 11 Upping Street, even?
140 00:05:45,312 00:05:48,982 On second thought, I'll fight you on your own terms. On second thought, I'll fight you on your own terms.
141 00:05:49,049 00:05:50,083 screeching screeching
142 00:05:50,150 00:05:51,419 [echoing voice] Marquis of Queensbury [echoing voice] Marquis of Queensbury
143 00:05:51,485 00:05:53,454 bridge rules, of course. bridge rules, of course.
144 00:05:53,521 00:05:56,924 I'll mop your scalp, you scurvy knave! I'll mop your scalp, you scurvy knave!
145 00:05:56,990 00:05:58,492 Then let's have at it. Then let's have at it.
146 00:05:58,559 00:06:00,293 'Od's fish! Zounds! 'Od's fish! Zounds!
147 00:06:00,360 00:06:02,963 And all that King Arthur jazz-a-roonie. And all that King Arthur jazz-a-roonie.
148 00:06:03,030 00:06:05,433 boing boing
149 00:06:05,499 00:06:08,536 Crikey! Is there a doctor in the castle? Crikey! Is there a doctor in the castle?
150 00:06:08,602 00:06:11,371 Hee hee hee! No! We never need them. Hee hee hee! No! We never need them.
151 00:06:11,439 00:06:12,440 - Hee hee hee! - Hee hee hee! - Hee hee hee! - Hee hee hee!
152 00:06:12,506 00:06:15,208 - Ha ha ha! - Ha ha ha! - Ha ha ha! - Ha ha ha!
153 00:06:15,275 00:06:17,778 Exit, prescribin' for myself Exit, prescribin' for myself
154 00:06:17,845 00:06:19,447 stage left. stage left.
155 00:06:22,382 00:06:24,918 I'd like to see 'em get through this door. I'd like to see 'em get through this door.
156 00:06:24,985 00:06:26,286 dong dong dong dong
157 00:06:26,353 00:06:27,421 Hello there! Hello there!
158 00:06:27,488 00:06:28,489 - Hee hee hee! - Hee hee hee! - Hee hee hee! - Hee hee hee!
159 00:06:28,556 00:06:30,424 Heavens to Houdini! Heavens to Houdini!
160 00:06:30,491 00:06:31,825 They did it! They did it!
161 00:06:31,892 00:06:34,227 How come you can walk through doors How come you can walk through doors
162 00:06:34,294 00:06:35,729 and I can't? and I can't?
163 00:06:35,796 00:06:39,399 Maybe it's because we're ghosts and you're not. Maybe it's because we're ghosts and you're not.
164 00:06:39,467 00:06:40,768 G-g-g-ghosts? G-g-g-ghosts?
165 00:06:40,834 00:06:43,871 'Hee hee hee! Would you like to join us?' 'Hee hee hee! Would you like to join us?'
166 00:06:43,937 00:06:45,105 No, thanks! No, thanks!
167 00:06:45,172 00:06:46,940 Exit, screamin' in terror Exit, screamin' in terror
168 00:06:47,007 00:06:48,442 stage right! stage right!
169 00:06:49,309 00:06:50,844 Well...there he goes. Well...there he goes.
170 00:06:50,911 00:06:55,282 Hee hee hee! Best fun we've had in 900 years! Hee hee hee! Best fun we've had in 900 years!
171 00:06:55,348 00:06:57,150 Yeah! Hoo hoo hoo! Yeah! Hoo hoo hoo!
172 00:06:57,217 00:06:59,352 Maybe he'll even come back. Maybe he'll even come back.
173 00:06:59,419 00:07:01,822 You should live so long! You should live so long!
174 00:07:05,092 00:07:08,028 [theme music] [theme music]