# Start End Original Translated
1 00:00:01,269 00:00:03,404 [theme music] [theme music]
2 00:00:24,425 00:00:25,959 (male #1) 'Attention, please.' (male #1) 'Attention, please.'
3 00:00:26,026 00:00:28,162 [clears throat] 'Major Minor' [clears throat] 'Major Minor'
4 00:00:28,229 00:00:30,298 'this is a most unhappy duty' 'this is a most unhappy duty'
5 00:00:30,364 00:00:33,534 I must perform for the Adventurer's Club. I must perform for the Adventurer's Club.
6 00:00:33,601 00:00:36,870 Since you have repeatedly failed to capture Snagglepuss Since you have repeatedly failed to capture Snagglepuss
7 00:00:36,937 00:00:40,574 we are forced to drum you out of the Adventurer's Club. we are forced to drum you out of the Adventurer's Club.
8 00:00:40,641 00:00:44,712 First, I'll divest you of your wildebeest whistle. First, I'll divest you of your wildebeest whistle.
9 00:00:44,778 00:00:46,046 ByGadfrey. ByGadfrey.
10 00:00:46,114 00:00:49,083 And your Adventurer's button. And your Adventurer's button.
11 00:00:49,150 00:00:51,352 By thunder. By thunder.
12 00:00:51,419 00:00:56,090 Now go and never dampen our teacups again. Now go and never dampen our teacups again.
13 00:00:56,157 00:00:58,292 [drum roll] [drum roll]
14 00:00:59,560 00:01:02,463 By Jupiter, I've been disgraced By Jupiter, I've been disgraced
15 00:01:02,530 00:01:05,333 and it's all that bounder Snagglepuss' fault. and it's all that bounder Snagglepuss' fault.
16 00:01:05,399 00:01:07,067 I'll get him for this. I'll get him for this.
17 00:01:08,769 00:01:13,507 He's tricky, so I'll pretend I'm delivering fresh crumpets. He's tricky, so I'll pretend I'm delivering fresh crumpets.
18 00:01:13,574 00:01:18,179 Then when he opens the door, I'll blast him, byGadfrey. Then when he opens the door, I'll blast him, byGadfrey.
19 00:01:18,246 00:01:19,513 [bell rings] [bell rings]
20 00:01:19,580 00:01:21,615 (Snagglepuss) 'Who ringeth at my door?' (Snagglepuss) 'Who ringeth at my door?'
21 00:01:21,682 00:01:25,153 It's me, the jolly old crumpet man. It's me, the jolly old crumpet man.
22 00:01:25,219 00:01:27,087 'Cometh around some other day.' 'Cometh around some other day.'
23 00:01:27,155 00:01:29,557 I'm frightfully busy. I'm frightfully busy.
24 00:01:29,623 00:01:33,427 As I was sayin', sir, I know Shakespeare, Ibsen As I was sayin', sir, I know Shakespeare, Ibsen
25 00:01:33,494 00:01:36,964 Longfella, Shortfella even. Longfella, Shortfella even.
26 00:01:37,030 00:01:39,533 So when do I start rehearsin', hmm? So when do I start rehearsin', hmm?
27 00:01:39,600 00:01:42,936 When, as in how soon? When, sir? When, as in how soon? When, sir?
28 00:01:43,003 00:01:44,505 [phone disconnects] [phone disconnects]
29 00:01:44,572 00:01:45,773 We were cut off! We were cut off!
30 00:01:45,839 00:01:48,976 Oh, well, there are loads of bookin' agents Oh, well, there are loads of bookin' agents
31 00:01:49,042 00:01:50,678 'and I'm still on the As.' 'and I'm still on the As.'
32 00:01:50,744 00:01:55,283 By Gadfrey, he's still the same old hambone Snagglepuss. By Gadfrey, he's still the same old hambone Snagglepuss.
33 00:01:55,349 00:01:57,451 Just listen to that lion's line. Just listen to that lion's line.
34 00:01:57,518 00:02:00,588 Hello, Acme Bookin' Agency? Hello, Acme Bookin' Agency?
35 00:02:00,654 00:02:03,056 Your actin' worries are over. Your actin' worries are over.
36 00:02:03,123 00:02:05,793 For I play to standin' room only. For I play to standin' room only.
37 00:02:05,859 00:02:07,528 Sittin' room only? Sittin' room only?
38 00:02:07,595 00:02:10,698 I'll tell you what. I'll sell popcorn in the lobby. I'll tell you what. I'll sell popcorn in the lobby.
39 00:02:10,764 00:02:14,034 I'll pop it, peddle it, and pay for it even. I'll pop it, peddle it, and pay for it even.
40 00:02:14,101 00:02:15,068 Give me a chance. Give me a chance.
41 00:02:15,135 00:02:16,337 [phone disconnects] [phone disconnects]
42 00:02:16,404 00:02:19,173 No wonder I could never capture Snagglepuss. No wonder I could never capture Snagglepuss.
43 00:02:19,240 00:02:20,841 I used a gun. I used a gun.
44 00:02:20,908 00:02:24,745 This time, byGadfrey, I'll use psychology. This time, byGadfrey, I'll use psychology.
45 00:02:26,380 00:02:29,016 I'm down to the Zs in the directory I'm down to the Zs in the directory
46 00:02:29,082 00:02:31,252 and there's just one of those. and there's just one of those.
47 00:02:31,319 00:02:34,455 "Zilvester Z. Zizzer." "Zilvester Z. Zizzer."
48 00:02:34,522 00:02:38,459 If Z.Z.Z. won't have me, I'm zunk. If Z.Z.Z. won't have me, I'm zunk.
49 00:02:38,526 00:02:42,430 Hello, is this, Zilvester Z. Zizzer? Hello, is this, Zilvester Z. Zizzer?
50 00:02:42,496 00:02:44,932 I'm an actor. Listen. I'm an actor. Listen.
51 00:02:44,998 00:02:49,337 Ladies and gentlemen, come one, come all! Ladies and gentlemen, come one, come all!
52 00:02:49,403 00:02:54,708 See Major Minor's big traveling road show! ByGadfrey! See Major Minor's big traveling road show! ByGadfrey!
53 00:02:54,775 00:02:58,946 Heavens to Murgatroyd! As I breathe to live a little. Heavens to Murgatroyd! As I breathe to live a little.
54 00:03:01,014 00:03:03,584 Major, it's you. Major, it's you.
55 00:03:03,651 00:03:07,221 I didn't recognisize ya without your gun. I didn't recognisize ya without your gun.
56 00:03:07,288 00:03:08,489 What ensues? What ensues?
57 00:03:08,556 00:03:11,359 I was lured by the fragrance of grease paint I was lured by the fragrance of grease paint
58 00:03:11,425 00:03:14,495 the sound of applause, and all that showbiz jazz. the sound of applause, and all that showbiz jazz.
59 00:03:14,562 00:03:18,366 You mean, you no longer hunt the savage beast You mean, you no longer hunt the savage beast
60 00:03:18,432 00:03:19,833 gentle beast even? gentle beast even?
61 00:03:19,900 00:03:22,970 The only thing I hunt for now is an actor. The only thing I hunt for now is an actor.
62 00:03:23,036 00:03:24,505 An actor? An actor?
63 00:03:24,572 00:03:29,443 Exit, auditionin' all the way, stage left. Exit, auditionin' all the way, stage left.
64 00:03:29,510 00:03:32,112 As the mockingbird is mockin' As the mockingbird is mockin'
65 00:03:32,179 00:03:34,782 and long before the dawn hath gone and long before the dawn hath gone
66 00:03:34,848 00:03:37,150 I'll be waitin' neath the balcony I'll be waitin' neath the balcony
67 00:03:37,217 00:03:38,852 with knees a-knockin'. with knees a-knockin'.
68 00:03:38,919 00:03:42,155 Just call me Snag 'cause my name ain't John. Just call me Snag 'cause my name ain't John.
69 00:03:42,222 00:03:44,558 Ta-ta. Curtain. Ta-ta. Curtain.
70 00:03:46,159 00:03:49,797 Heavens to claustrophobia! I've been iron curtained. Heavens to claustrophobia! I've been iron curtained.
71 00:03:49,863 00:03:53,401 ByGadfrey,Snagglepuss, I've caught you at last. ByGadfrey,Snagglepuss, I've caught you at last.
72 00:03:53,467 00:03:57,738 Exit in sheer panic, stage left. Exit in sheer panic, stage left.
73 00:03:57,805 00:03:59,873 thud thud
74 00:03:59,940 00:04:01,008 What do you know? What do you know?
75 00:04:01,074 00:04:05,212 No exit stage left, so exit stage right. No exit stage left, so exit stage right.
76 00:04:05,279 00:04:06,580 thud thud
77 00:04:07,415 00:04:09,483 Ditto stage right. Ditto stage right.
78 00:04:09,550 00:04:11,251 It will be jolly good to be back It will be jolly good to be back
79 00:04:11,319 00:04:13,387 in the Adventurer's Club again. in the Adventurer's Club again.
80 00:04:13,454 00:04:15,423 As an actor, I should be able As an actor, I should be able
81 00:04:15,489 00:04:19,092 to impersonate a motor cop easily. to impersonate a motor cop easily.
82 00:04:19,159 00:04:21,695 [imitates police siren] [imitates police siren]
83 00:04:23,331 00:04:24,865 Uh-oh. It's a motor cop. Uh-oh. It's a motor cop.
84 00:04:24,932 00:04:27,835 (Snagglepuss) 'Alright, you, pull over.' (Snagglepuss) 'Alright, you, pull over.'
85 00:04:27,901 00:04:30,838 By Gadfrey, why should I? I'm not speeding. By Gadfrey, why should I? I'm not speeding.
86 00:04:30,904 00:04:35,876 True, but your gasket's goofin', your van belt's unbuckled True, but your gasket's goofin', your van belt's unbuckled
87 00:04:35,943 00:04:38,546 and your differential's actin' indifferent. and your differential's actin' indifferent.
88 00:04:38,612 00:04:42,316 So pull over and open that cage forthwith. So pull over and open that cage forthwith.
89 00:04:42,383 00:04:44,151 'Fifthwith even.' 'Fifthwith even.'
90 00:04:44,217 00:04:45,919 Hmm. Hmm.
91 00:04:45,986 00:04:47,020 screech screech
92 00:04:47,087 00:04:49,222 Would you like to see my license first Would you like to see my license first
93 00:04:49,289 00:04:51,258 Officer Snagglepuss? Officer Snagglepuss?
94 00:04:51,325 00:04:55,396 Major, didn't my superb actin' fool ya? Major, didn't my superb actin' fool ya?
95 00:04:55,463 00:04:57,731 Acting? Is that what that was? Acting? Is that what that was?
96 00:04:57,798 00:05:01,335 Oh, that I should suffer the slings and arrows Oh, that I should suffer the slings and arrows
97 00:05:01,402 00:05:03,537 of outrageous critics. of outrageous critics.
98 00:05:05,072 00:05:07,207 Three cheers for the major. Three cheers for the major.
99 00:05:07,274 00:05:09,343 (in unison) Hip hip hurray! (in unison) Hip hip hurray!
100 00:05:09,410 00:05:11,412 Hip hip hurray! Hip hip hurray!
101 00:05:11,479 00:05:13,747 Hip hip hurray! Hip hip hurray!
102 00:05:13,814 00:05:16,417 What a bunch of pip-pipsqueaks. What a bunch of pip-pipsqueaks.
103 00:05:16,484 00:05:20,187 Uh, welcome back to the Adventurer's Club, major. Uh, welcome back to the Adventurer's Club, major.
104 00:05:20,253 00:05:22,022 - Good show. - Thank you. - Good show. - Thank you.
105 00:05:22,089 00:05:24,525 And now that you've bagged the beast And now that you've bagged the beast
106 00:05:24,592 00:05:26,627 uh, what do you plan to do with him? uh, what do you plan to do with him?
107 00:05:26,694 00:05:29,029 No problem, Mr. Chairman. No problem, Mr. Chairman.
108 00:05:29,096 00:05:30,898 Sorry, Snagglepuss, old boy Sorry, Snagglepuss, old boy
109 00:05:30,964 00:05:33,701 fortunes of the hunt and all that jolly rot. fortunes of the hunt and all that jolly rot.
110 00:05:33,767 00:05:36,770 - This is it. - Hold it. Hold it. - This is it. - Hold it. Hold it.
111 00:05:36,837 00:05:38,739 What manner of sport are ya? What manner of sport are ya?
112 00:05:38,806 00:05:40,908 Don't I get a last cigarette to smoke Don't I get a last cigarette to smoke
113 00:05:40,974 00:05:45,145 a bubble pipe to blow, a grape to peel? a bubble pipe to blow, a grape to peel?
114 00:05:45,212 00:05:46,980 By Jove, the beast is right. By Jove, the beast is right.
115 00:05:47,047 00:05:49,817 No, no, no! He's tricky! He'll escape! No, no, no! He's tricky! He'll escape!
116 00:05:49,883 00:05:51,652 I know him better than you do. I know him better than you do.
117 00:05:51,719 00:05:55,556 Nevertheless, he must have a last wish. Nevertheless, he must have a last wish.
118 00:05:55,623 00:05:58,992 What is your request, you hapless beast? What is your request, you hapless beast?
119 00:05:59,059 00:06:02,596 I'd like a few partin' words on a real stage I'd like a few partin' words on a real stage
120 00:06:02,663 00:06:04,331 with a real audience with a real audience
121 00:06:04,398 00:06:08,802 and then I depart, happily even. and then I depart, happily even.
122 00:06:08,869 00:06:11,138 Come, you may use our stage Come, you may use our stage
123 00:06:11,204 00:06:14,608 and perform your last act for us members. and perform your last act for us members.
124 00:06:14,675 00:06:17,478 Thank you, kind sir, Shakespeare and I Thank you, kind sir, Shakespeare and I
125 00:06:17,545 00:06:19,513 will never forget ya. will never forget ya.
126 00:06:19,580 00:06:21,081 No, no, no, no! No, no, no, no!
127 00:06:23,216 00:06:27,621 I shall recite a few hundred sonnets of the immortal bard. I shall recite a few hundred sonnets of the immortal bard.
128 00:06:27,688 00:06:30,824 About 12 hours worth. Days even. About 12 hours worth. Days even.
129 00:06:30,891 00:06:33,827 Please, just one shot. He'll never feel it. Please, just one shot. He'll never feel it.
130 00:06:33,894 00:06:36,697 But we gave our word, dang it all. But we gave our word, dang it all.
131 00:06:36,764 00:06:41,368 It isn't that I love Caesar less, but that I love Rome more. It isn't that I love Caesar less, but that I love Rome more.
132 00:06:41,435 00:06:43,070 Alice Rome, that is. Alice Rome, that is.
133 00:06:43,136 00:06:47,908 So I ask ya, as gentlemen of Rome, this question So I ask ya, as gentlemen of Rome, this question
134 00:06:47,975 00:06:50,678 but wherefore art the gentlemen of Rome? but wherefore art the gentlemen of Rome?
135 00:06:50,744 00:06:53,481 Better yet, where are the gentlemen Better yet, where are the gentlemen
136 00:06:53,547 00:06:55,716 of the Adventurer's Club? of the Adventurer's Club?
137 00:06:55,783 00:06:57,618 Heavens to no taste! Heavens to no taste!
138 00:06:57,685 00:06:59,920 They were a bunch of Shakespeare haters. They were a bunch of Shakespeare haters.
139 00:06:59,987 00:07:01,522 For shame. For shame.
140 00:07:01,589 00:07:04,825 Oh, well, exit, one actor at liberty Oh, well, exit, one actor at liberty
141 00:07:04,892 00:07:06,460 stage left. stage left.
142 00:07:09,963 00:07:11,899 [theme music] [theme music]