# Start End Original Translated
1 00:00:25,000 00:00:27,000 [ singing in Aboriginal launguage ] [ singing in Aboriginal launguage ]
2 00:01:10,000 00:01:12,500 # Look at the sun # # Look at the sun #
3 00:01:12,500 00:01:14,000 # Falling from the sky # # Falling from the sky #
4 00:01:14,500 00:01:16,000 # Look at the sunset # # Look at the sunset #
5 00:01:16,000 00:01:17,500 # Takes my mind # # Takes my mind #
6 00:01:18,500 00:01:19,500 # Back # # Back #
7 00:01:20,000 00:01:21,500 # To my homeland # # To my homeland #
8 00:01:22,000 00:01:25,500 # Far away # # Far away #
9 00:01:25,500 00:01:27,000 # It's the story # # It's the story #
10 00:01:27,000 00:01:28,000 # It's the story # # It's the story #
11 00:01:28,000 00:01:29,500 # Runnin' in my mind # # Runnin' in my mind #
12 00:01:30,000 00:01:31,000 # It's so clear # # It's so clear #
13 00:01:31,000 00:01:32,000 # It's so clear # # It's so clear #
14 00:01:32,000 00:01:32,500 # I remember # # I remember #
15 00:01:33,000 00:01:33,500 # I remember # # I remember #
16 00:01:34,000 00:01:34,500 # Oh, my # # Oh, my #
17 00:01:35,000 00:01:35,500 # Oh, my # # Oh, my #
18 00:01:35,500 00:01:36,500 # Oh, my # # Oh, my #
19 00:01:36,500 00:01:37,500 # Oh, my # # Oh, my #
20 00:01:38,000 00:01:42,000 # Sunset gleaming # # Sunset gleaming #
21 00:01:57,000 00:01:58,000 # Hey # # Hey #
22 00:01:58,000 00:01:59,000 # Hey, people # # Hey, people #
23 00:01:59,000 00:02:00,500 # Can you dig what I say? # # Can you dig what I say? #
24 00:02:00,500 00:02:01,500 # Our land # # Our land #
25 00:02:01,500 00:02:02,500 # Our land # # Our land #
26 00:02:02,500 00:02:03,500 # Hear what I say # # Hear what I say #
27 00:02:03,500 00:02:04,500 # Hear what I say # # Hear what I say #
28 00:02:04,500 00:02:06,000 # To the people # # To the people #
29 00:02:06,500 00:02:08,000 # Of the land # # Of the land #
30 00:02:08,000 00:02:09,000 # Try my # # Try my #
31 00:02:09,000 00:02:10,000 # Try my # # Try my #
32 00:02:10,000 00:02:12,000 # Try my # # Try my #
33 00:02:12,000 00:02:12,800 # Sunset, baby # # Sunset, baby #
34 00:02:19,500 00:02:22,000 [ various native animal sounds ] [ various native animal sounds ]
35 00:02:24,500 00:02:26,500 [ snoring ] [ snoring ]
36 00:02:32,500 00:02:35,000 The Kelly Gang had been holding up banks The Kelly Gang had been holding up banks
37 00:02:35,000 00:02:39,000 for as long as, well, for as long as there'd been banks. for as long as, well, for as long as there'd been banks.
38 00:02:39,000 00:02:40,500 Historically, we were the World's First Biker Gang. Historically, we were the World's First Biker Gang.
39 00:02:41,000 00:02:43,500 What really set us apart from all the other outlaws What really set us apart from all the other outlaws
40 00:02:43,500 00:02:46,000 was our philosophy. was our philosophy.
41 00:02:46,000 00:02:50,000 We always gave everything we stole to the poor. We always gave everything we stole to the poor.
42 00:02:50,000 00:02:54,500 My uncle Dan had been the most notorious aboriginal outlaw My uncle Dan had been the most notorious aboriginal outlaw
43 00:02:54,500 00:02:56,000 of all time, of all time,
44 00:02:56,000 00:02:58,500 until he retired to run the family pub. until he retired to run the family pub.
45 00:02:58,500 00:03:01,000 My brother job was the Gang's tax expert, My brother job was the Gang's tax expert,
46 00:03:01,000 00:03:03,500 and the rest of the Gang worked full-time and the rest of the Gang worked full-time
47 00:03:03,500 00:03:07,000 in the manufacture and consumption of beer. in the manufacture and consumption of beer.
48 00:03:07,500 00:03:10,000 Come on, Ned. You're be late for work. Come on, Ned. You're be late for work.
49 00:03:14,000 00:03:16,500 # Wild thing # # Wild thing #
50 00:03:17,500 00:03:21,000 # You make my heart sing... # # You make my heart sing... #
51 00:03:21,000 00:03:23,500 Yep. Times has changed, all right. Yep. Times has changed, all right.
52 00:03:23,500 00:03:25,500 The entire bank-robbing division The entire bank-robbing division
53 00:03:25,500 00:03:28,000 of the once world-famous Kelly Gang of the once world-famous Kelly Gang
54 00:03:28,000 00:03:30,500 had been reduced to just one man... had been reduced to just one man...
55 00:03:30,500 00:03:31,250 me. me.
56 00:03:32,000 00:03:34,000 [ loud buzzing ] [ loud buzzing ]
57 00:03:36,500 00:03:38,500 [ whimpers ] [ whimpers ]
58 00:03:38,500 00:03:39,820 [ buzzing ] [ buzzing ]
59 00:03:46,000 00:03:47,000 # Oh # # Oh #
60 00:03:47,500 00:03:49,000 # Wild thing # # Wild thing #
61 00:03:50,500 00:03:54,500 # You make my heart sing, yeah... # # You make my heart sing, yeah... #
62 00:03:54,500 00:03:56,500 We lived in this wild pub. We lived in this wild pub.
63 00:03:56,500 00:03:59,500 It was so old that no one was sure It was so old that no one was sure
64 00:03:59,500 00:04:01,000 if it was actually built if it was actually built
65 00:04:01,000 00:04:03,500 or just somehow grew out of the ground. or just somehow grew out of the ground.
66 00:04:03,500 00:04:06,000 Over the years, it has become home Over the years, it has become home
67 00:04:06,000 00:04:08,500 to every kind of wildlife you can imagine. to every kind of wildlife you can imagine.
68 00:04:08,500 00:04:09,500 # Wild thing # # Wild thing #
69 00:04:09,500 00:04:10,500 # Wild thing # # Wild thing #
70 00:04:11,000 00:04:13,500 [ bubbling ] [ bubbling ]
71 00:04:19,000 00:04:20,500 Apart from my dog, Apart from my dog,
72 00:04:20,500 00:04:22,500 my bike was my best mate. my bike was my best mate.
73 00:04:22,500 00:04:25,000 I personally built it from the wheels up I personally built it from the wheels up
74 00:04:25,000 00:04:26,500 out of scrap metal. out of scrap metal.
75 00:04:26,500 00:04:29,000 Sure, it had some minor structural problems. Sure, it had some minor structural problems.
76 00:04:29,000 00:04:30,500 It wasn't exactly mechanically perfect, It wasn't exactly mechanically perfect,
77 00:04:30,500 00:04:32,000 but everyone respected it. but everyone respected it.
78 00:04:32,000 00:04:33,000 [ boom ] [ boom ]
79 00:04:33,000 00:04:35,000 Especially Joe. Especially Joe.
80 00:04:41,000 00:04:42,000 Morning, Dan. Morning, Dan.
81 00:04:42,500 00:04:43,000 Morning, Ned. Morning, Ned.
82 00:04:43,500 00:04:44,500 It is refueled. It is refueled.
83 00:04:44,500 00:04:46,000 Thanks, Joe. Thanks, Joe.
84 00:04:46,500 00:04:49,500 You still haven't fixed that leaking pump. You still haven't fixed that leaking pump.
85 00:04:52,000 00:04:53,500 [ machine groans ] [ machine groans ]
86 00:04:53,500 00:04:55,500 Have now. Have now.
87 00:04:56,000 00:04:57,000 [ backfiring ] [ backfiring ]
88 00:04:57,000 00:04:58,000 Ooh! Ooh!
89 00:04:59,500 00:05:01,000 See yourself. See yourself.
90 00:05:02,500 00:05:06,000 Our pub was on the shore of a national park, Our pub was on the shore of a national park,
91 00:05:06,000 00:05:07,500 hundreds of miles from anywhere. hundreds of miles from anywhere.
92 00:05:07,500 00:05:10,000 I reckon it was as close to paradise I reckon it was as close to paradise
93 00:05:10,000 00:05:11,500 as you can get. as you can get.
94 00:05:24,500 00:05:26,500 Riding to work that day, Riding to work that day,
95 00:05:26,500 00:05:29,500 nothing seemed different from any other day. nothing seemed different from any other day.
96 00:05:30,000 00:05:34,000 At least that's what I thought at the time. At least that's what I thought at the time.
97 00:05:46,500 00:05:48,500 [ tires screech ] [ tires screech ]
98 00:05:49,000 00:05:52,000 Good morning. I'd like to make a withdrawal. Good morning. I'd like to make a withdrawal.
99 00:05:52,000 00:05:54,500 [ machine speaking ] [ machine speaking ]
100 00:05:54,500 00:05:56,500 It's a .44. It's a .44.
101 00:05:56,500 00:05:59,500 Check out the dickhead talking to a machine. Check out the dickhead talking to a machine.
102 00:05:59,500 00:06:01,000 That's no dickhead. That's no dickhead.
103 00:06:01,000 00:06:03,000 That's Ned Kelly. That's Ned Kelly.
104 00:06:04,000 00:06:05,000 Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah!
105 00:06:05,500 00:06:06,500 [ machine speaking ] [ machine speaking ]
106 00:06:06,500 00:06:08,500 I don't think so. I don't think so.
107 00:06:09,500 00:06:12,000 Ouch. Computer malfunction. Ouch. Computer malfunction.
108 00:06:14,500 00:06:15,220 Bingo. Bingo.
109 00:06:16,500 00:06:18,500 [ counting in distorted machine voice ] [ counting in distorted machine voice ]
110 00:06:32,000 00:06:33,500 This is the Kelly Gang... This is the Kelly Gang...
111 00:06:34,000 00:06:36,000 [ all gasp ] [ all gasp ]
112 00:06:36,000 00:06:38,000 And I'd like to make a deposit. And I'd like to make a deposit.
113 00:06:38,500 00:06:40,000 Deposit? Deposit?
114 00:06:40,500 00:06:43,000 Yeah. Deposit this money Yeah. Deposit this money
115 00:06:43,500 00:06:46,500 amongst the bank accounts of any people who can't repay their loans. amongst the bank accounts of any people who can't repay their loans.
116 00:06:46,500 00:06:49,500 And I want receipts, and I want 'em now. And I want receipts, and I want 'em now.
117 00:06:49,500 00:06:53,000 Oui. Oui. I will get all the staff onto it. Oui. Oui. I will get all the staff onto it.
118 00:06:59,000 00:07:01,500 All officers, take your positions. All officers, take your positions.
119 00:07:08,000 00:07:10,500 It was then I heard something It was then I heard something
120 00:07:11,000 00:07:13,500 you rarely hear in the middle of a bank robbery... you rarely hear in the middle of a bank robbery...
121 00:07:14,000 00:07:15,500 Shakespeare. Shakespeare.
122 00:07:15,500 00:07:17,500 "If music be the food of love, "If music be the food of love,
123 00:07:18,000 00:07:21,500 play on. Give me excess of it." play on. Give me excess of it."
124 00:07:24,000 00:07:27,500 "If music be the food of love..." "If music be the food of love..."
125 00:07:27,500 00:07:30,000 And who are you? And who are you?
126 00:07:30,000 00:07:32,000 Robin Banks. Robin Banks.
127 00:07:32,000 00:07:34,500 I was earlier. Now I'm depositin'. I was earlier. Now I'm depositin'.
128 00:07:35,000 00:07:40,000 This is my lunch break. This is my lunch break.
129 00:07:40,000 00:07:42,000 I love american accents. I love american accents.
130 00:07:42,500 00:07:44,000 Excuse me. Excuse me.
131 00:07:44,000 00:07:46,500 I like the way you talk. I like the way you talk.
132 00:07:46,500 00:07:50,000 In fact, I like everything about America. In fact, I like everything about America.
133 00:07:51,000 00:07:52,000 What you reading? What you reading?
134 00:07:52,000 00:07:53,000 Shakespeare. Shakespeare.
135 00:07:53,000 00:07:55,000 [ fly buzzes ] [ fly buzzes ]
136 00:07:56,000 00:07:57,500 [ people scream ] [ people scream ]
137 00:07:59,000 00:08:01,000 I hate flies. I hate flies.
138 00:08:01,000 00:08:03,000 Mr. Kelly, all the people's receipts. Mr. Kelly, all the people's receipts.
139 00:08:03,000 00:08:04,000 [ sirens ] [ sirens ]
140 00:08:04,000 00:08:05,500 Thanks, mate. Thanks, mate.
141 00:08:08,500 00:08:10,500 This time he's trapped. This time he's trapped.
142 00:08:11,500 00:08:13,000 Hey... Hey...
143 00:08:13,000 00:08:15,000 maybe I'll see you later. maybe I'll see you later.
144 00:08:15,500 00:08:17,500 I doubt it, cowboy. I doubt it, cowboy.
145 00:08:24,500 00:08:25,500 [ buzzer ] [ buzzer ]
146 00:08:27,500 00:08:28,500 Bye, Ned. Bye, Ned.
147 00:08:41,000 00:08:42,500 Wait for it. Wait for it.
148 00:08:43,000 00:08:44,500 [ cocks gun ] [ cocks gun ]
149 00:08:54,500 00:08:56,000 What's the matter, boys? What's the matter, boys?
150 00:08:58,500 00:09:02,500 # Robbin' people with a six-gun # # Robbin' people with a six-gun #
151 00:09:02,500 00:09:05,000 # I fought the law and the law won # # I fought the law and the law won #
152 00:09:05,500 00:09:08,000 # I fought the law and the law won # # I fought the law and the law won #
153 00:09:08,500 00:09:10,500 # I needed money 'cause # # I needed money 'cause #
154 00:09:10,500 00:09:11,500 # I had none # # I had none #
155 00:09:11,500 00:09:14,000 # I fought the law, and the # # I fought the law, and the #
156 00:09:14,000 00:09:15,000 # Law won # # Law won #
157 00:09:15,000 00:09:16,000 # I fought the law # # I fought the law #
158 00:09:16,500 00:09:17,500 # And the law won # # And the law won #
159 00:09:17,500 00:09:20,500 # I left my baby, and I feel so bad # # I left my baby, and I feel so bad #
160 00:09:20,500 00:09:24,000 # I guess my race is run # # I guess my race is run #
161 00:09:24,000 00:09:27,500 # She's the best girl that I ever had # # She's the best girl that I ever had #
162 00:09:28,000 00:09:30,500 # I fought the law, and the law won # # I fought the law, and the law won #
163 00:09:30,500 00:09:32,500 # I fought the law, and the-- # # I fought the law, and the-- #
164 00:09:33,500 00:09:36,500 # I lost my girl, and I lost my fun # # I lost my girl, and I lost my fun #
165 00:09:36,500 00:09:39,500 # I fought the law, and the law won # # I fought the law, and the law won #
166 00:09:40,000 00:09:43,500 # I fought the law, and the law won # # I fought the law, and the law won #
167 00:09:43,500 00:09:46,000 # I fought the law, and the law won # # I fought the law, and the law won #
168 00:09:46,000 00:09:49,000 # Hey, I fought the law, and the law won # # Hey, I fought the law, and the law won #
169 00:09:49,500 00:09:51,500 # I fought the law, and the law won # # I fought the law, and the law won #
170 00:09:51,500 00:09:52,500 After him! After him!
171 00:09:53,000 00:09:55,500 # I fought the law, and the law won # # I fought the law, and the law won #
172 00:09:56,000 00:09:58,000 # I said I fought the law... # # I said I fought the law... #
173 00:10:16,000 00:10:18,500 Of course, I didn't know it at the time, Of course, I didn't know it at the time,
174 00:10:19,000 00:10:21,500 but I'd just triggered off a chain of events but I'd just triggered off a chain of events
175 00:10:21,500 00:10:24,000 that was to threaten the very existence that was to threaten the very existence
176 00:10:24,000 00:10:25,500 of the Kelly Gang. of the Kelly Gang.
177 00:10:25,500 00:10:28,000 "...cannot see the pretty fall leaves that themselves commit, "...cannot see the pretty fall leaves that themselves commit,
178 00:10:28,000 00:10:31,000 or if they could, Cupid himself would blush." or if they could, Cupid himself would blush."
179 00:10:31,000 00:10:33,000 The outlaw The outlaw
180 00:10:33,000 00:10:34,500 dropped this. dropped this.
181 00:10:34,500 00:10:38,000 Take it to Sir John's office immediately. Take it to Sir John's office immediately.
182 00:10:44,000 00:10:47,000 Ned Kelly has robbed yet another branch Ned Kelly has robbed yet another branch
183 00:10:47,000 00:10:49,000 of the International Trust Bank, of the International Trust Bank,
184 00:10:49,000 00:10:52,500 but this time his target was head office. but this time his target was head office.
185 00:10:52,500 00:10:54,500 The bank's largest foreign investors The bank's largest foreign investors
186 00:10:54,500 00:10:57,000 have responded by threatening to pack up have responded by threatening to pack up
187 00:10:57,000 00:10:58,500 and go home. and go home.
188 00:10:58,500 00:11:02,000 However, locals are reacting quite differently. However, locals are reacting quite differently.
189 00:11:02,000 00:11:04,000 Ned Kelly's deadly. He's great. Ned Kelly's deadly. He's great.
190 00:11:04,000 00:11:04,500 He's wonderful. He's wonderful.
191 00:11:05,000 00:11:06,000 He's fabulous. He's fabulous.
192 00:11:06,000 00:11:07,000 He gives us the cash. He gives us the cash.
193 00:11:07,000 00:11:08,500 He's got a great bike. He's got a great bike.
194 00:11:08,500 00:11:11,000 Since Ned Kelly has been depositing money Since Ned Kelly has been depositing money
195 00:11:11,000 00:11:12,000 in our bank account, in our bank account,
196 00:11:12,000 00:11:14,000 I can afford more groceries. I can afford more groceries.
197 00:11:14,000 00:11:15,000 Look. Look.
198 00:11:16,500 00:11:18,500 Through the haphazard program Through the haphazard program
199 00:11:18,500 00:11:20,500 of redistributing money, of redistributing money,
200 00:11:20,500 00:11:22,500 the Kelly Gang has effectively the Kelly Gang has effectively
201 00:11:22,500 00:11:24,500 lowered interest rates, cut inflation, lowered interest rates, cut inflation,
202 00:11:24,500 00:11:27,000 and raised the standard of living and raised the standard of living
203 00:11:27,000 00:11:28,500 for the average family. for the average family.
204 00:11:28,500 00:11:30,000 Rotten bastards. Rotten bastards.
205 00:11:30,500 00:11:34,500 It's been Ned Kelly's complete disregard for authority It's been Ned Kelly's complete disregard for authority
206 00:11:34,500 00:11:37,000 that has captured the Hearts of the People that has captured the Hearts of the People
207 00:11:37,000 00:11:39,500 and made him something of a national hero. and made him something of a national hero.
208 00:11:41,000 00:11:42,500 Yes? Yes?
209 00:11:45,500 00:11:49,000 Sir John, one of our young tellers Sir John, one of our young tellers
210 00:11:49,000 00:11:51,500 has some information regarding the robbery. has some information regarding the robbery.
211 00:11:51,500 00:11:53,000 What is it? What is it?
212 00:11:53,500 00:11:55,500 Apparently this was dropped during the holdup. Apparently this was dropped during the holdup.
213 00:11:56,000 00:11:57,500 Oh, Sir John. Oh, Sir John.
214 00:11:58,000 00:12:01,000 There's also a Major Wib here to see you. There's also a Major Wib here to see you.
215 00:12:01,000 00:12:03,500 Yes. Come in. Yes. Come in.
216 00:12:04,000 00:12:07,500 [ clanking ] [ clanking ]
217 00:12:12,500 00:12:15,000 Major Wib from Great Britain, sir. Major Wib from Great Britain, sir.
218 00:12:15,000 00:12:17,500 Formerly of Her Majesty's personal guards. Formerly of Her Majesty's personal guards.
219 00:12:17,500 00:12:19,000 Five years Scotland Yard, Five years Scotland Yard,
220 00:12:19,000 00:12:21,000 three years Royal British Commandos. three years Royal British Commandos.
221 00:12:21,000 00:12:24,000 Served with distinction special forces-- intelligence branch. Served with distinction special forces-- intelligence branch.
222 00:12:24,000 00:12:28,000 At your service, Vis-a-vis the Kelly problem. At your service, Vis-a-vis the Kelly problem.
223 00:12:28,000 00:12:29,500 That's very impressive, Major. That's very impressive, Major.
224 00:12:29,500 00:12:31,000 Thank you, Sir John. Thank you, Sir John.
225 00:12:31,000 00:12:34,500 I had the pleasure of being on duty at Buckingham Palace I had the pleasure of being on duty at Buckingham Palace
226 00:12:34,500 00:12:36,500 the day you got your knighthood. the day you got your knighthood.
227 00:12:36,500 00:12:38,000 Oh, really? Oh, really?
228 00:12:38,500 00:12:40,000 Yes. Rah-rah poo-poo, sir. Yes. Rah-rah poo-poo, sir.
229 00:12:40,000 00:12:42,500 It's about time we had a man It's about time we had a man
230 00:12:42,500 00:12:44,500 of your particular talents working exclusively for us of your particular talents working exclusively for us
231 00:12:44,500 00:12:46,500 in the field of corporate banking. in the field of corporate banking.
232 00:12:46,500 00:12:48,000 If you'll pardon the pun, sir, If you'll pardon the pun, sir,
233 00:12:48,000 00:12:50,500 I plan to make a killing. I plan to make a killing.
234 00:12:53,000 00:12:55,500 Thank you. That'll be all. Thank you. That'll be all.
235 00:12:57,000 00:12:59,500 Please, Major. Please, Major.
236 00:13:01,500 00:13:03,500 Now, what do you make of this? Now, what do you make of this?
237 00:13:06,000 00:13:07,500 It's a toweling mat, It's a toweling mat,
238 00:13:08,000 00:13:11,000 commonly used on the top of Australian hotel bars commonly used on the top of Australian hotel bars
239 00:13:11,000 00:13:13,500 for the absorption of beer spillage. for the absorption of beer spillage.
240 00:13:16,000 00:13:18,500 Looks like some sort of a rodent. Looks like some sort of a rodent.
241 00:13:18,500 00:13:20,500 Is it a rat? Is it a rat?
242 00:13:20,500 00:13:22,000 It's a kangaroo, sir. It's a kangaroo, sir.
243 00:13:22,000 00:13:23,500 [ squeak ] [ squeak ]
244 00:13:31,000 00:13:34,000 The Glenrowan Hotel. The Glenrowan Hotel.
245 00:13:36,500 00:13:41,000 It's in a national park called Reckless Island. It's in a national park called Reckless Island.
246 00:13:41,000 00:13:43,500 No wonder the police can't track them down. No wonder the police can't track them down.
247 00:13:43,500 00:13:45,500 According to this, it's a remote wilderness. According to this, it's a remote wilderness.
248 00:13:46,000 00:13:49,500 Kelly would know that island like the back of his hand. Kelly would know that island like the back of his hand.
249 00:13:49,500 00:13:52,000 At the first sign of armed aggression, At the first sign of armed aggression,
250 00:13:52,000 00:13:54,500 he'd vanish into the bush and pick us off like flies. he'd vanish into the bush and pick us off like flies.
251 00:13:54,500 00:13:56,000 [ fly buzzes ] [ fly buzzes ]
252 00:13:56,000 00:13:57,000 Yes, you're right. Yes, you're right.
253 00:13:57,500 00:14:00,000 Major, the one thing you'll learn in business Major, the one thing you'll learn in business
254 00:14:00,500 00:14:02,500 is that almost anything can be achieved is that almost anything can be achieved
255 00:14:02,500 00:14:07,000 by having good political connections. by having good political connections.
256 00:14:07,000 00:14:09,500 Miss Twisty, draft a confidential fax Miss Twisty, draft a confidential fax
257 00:14:10,000 00:14:11,500 to the department of national parks. to the department of national parks.
258 00:14:12,000 00:14:14,000 Tell them that the bank will be acting Tell them that the bank will be acting
259 00:14:14,500 00:14:16,500 as the Sole Agent for the sale of Reckless Island. as the Sole Agent for the sale of Reckless Island.
260 00:14:17,000 00:14:19,000 Right away, Sir John. Right away, Sir John.
261 00:14:19,000 00:14:21,500 You can't sell a national park. You can't sell a national park.
262 00:14:21,500 00:14:22,500 Wib? Wib?
263 00:14:23,500 00:14:26,500 I'm going to turn Kelly's hideout I'm going to turn Kelly's hideout
264 00:14:26,500 00:14:30,000 into a... japanese tourist resort. into a... japanese tourist resort.
265 00:14:31,500 00:14:38,000 # Met down by the jetty landing # # Met down by the jetty landing #
266 00:14:39,500 00:14:42,000 # Where the... # # Where the... #
267 00:14:48,500 00:14:54,000 # The others rated standing # # The others rated standing #
268 00:14:55,500 00:15:01,000 # Like Scott of the Antarctic # # Like Scott of the Antarctic #
269 00:15:01,000 00:15:05,500 # Base camp too far away # # Base camp too far away #
270 00:15:08,500 00:15:11,500 # She don't like # # She don't like #
271 00:15:11,500 00:15:14,500 # That kind of behaviour # # That kind of behaviour #
272 00:15:16,500 00:15:19,000 # She don't like # # She don't like #
273 00:15:19,000 00:15:23,000 # That kind of behavior... # # That kind of behavior... #
274 00:15:26,500 00:15:29,500 For a Kelly, getting shot was an occupational hazard. For a Kelly, getting shot was an occupational hazard.
275 00:15:29,500 00:15:33,000 But I guess over the years we must have developed But I guess over the years we must have developed
276 00:15:33,000 00:15:35,000 some sort of natural tolerance. some sort of natural tolerance.
277 00:15:35,000 00:15:36,000 [ siren ] [ siren ]
278 00:15:36,000 00:15:39,000 [ barking ] [ barking ]
279 00:15:39,500 00:15:41,500 Unfortunately, I still had to spend Unfortunately, I still had to spend
280 00:15:41,500 00:15:45,500 a heck of a lot of time digging out bullets. a heck of a lot of time digging out bullets.
281 00:15:52,000 00:15:54,000 Good morning, ma'am. Good morning, ma'am.
282 00:15:54,000 00:15:56,500 How may the bank help you? How may the bank help you?
283 00:15:56,500 00:15:59,000 I'm taking out a loan. I'm taking out a loan.
284 00:15:59,500 00:16:00,500 Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
285 00:16:01,000 00:16:02,000 It's the Hollywood Outlaw! It's the Hollywood Outlaw!
286 00:16:02,500 00:16:03,500 Aah! Aah!
287 00:16:03,500 00:16:04,500 Don't kill me. Don't kill me.
288 00:16:04,500 00:16:06,000 I've never killed anyone. I've never killed anyone.
289 00:16:06,000 00:16:07,500 I only shoot guns I only shoot guns
290 00:16:07,500 00:16:10,000 from the hands of those who would... from the hands of those who would...
291 00:16:10,000 00:16:11,500 Prefer to see me dead. Prefer to see me dead.
292 00:16:11,500 00:16:13,500 Now, hand over the money. Now, hand over the money.
293 00:16:14,000 00:16:16,000 I've got some shopping to do. I've got some shopping to do.
294 00:16:18,000 00:16:21,000 Freeze, lady! Stay right where you are! Freeze, lady! Stay right where you are!
295 00:16:22,500 00:16:24,000 I regret the day I regret the day
296 00:16:24,000 00:16:26,500 I let you put a video store here. I let you put a video store here.
297 00:16:26,500 00:16:29,000 All you and that dog ever do All you and that dog ever do
298 00:16:29,500 00:16:31,500 is watch that same dumb movie. is watch that same dumb movie.
299 00:16:32,000 00:16:34,000 Hey! We were watching that. Hey! We were watching that.
300 00:16:34,000 00:16:35,000 [ dog barking ] [ dog barking ]
301 00:16:35,500 00:16:37,500 I'm getting shot to pieces, and for what? I'm getting shot to pieces, and for what?
302 00:16:37,500 00:16:40,500 We got the biggest turnover of any bank robbers around We got the biggest turnover of any bank robbers around
303 00:16:40,500 00:16:43,000 and we still can't afford to fix the pub. and we still can't afford to fix the pub.
304 00:16:43,000 00:16:45,000 Using stolen money for our own benefit Using stolen money for our own benefit
305 00:16:45,000 00:16:47,000 would be against every principle would be against every principle
306 00:16:47,000 00:16:50,000 upon which the Kelly Gang was founded. upon which the Kelly Gang was founded.
307 00:16:50,500 00:16:51,000 [ pop ] [ pop ]
308 00:16:51,500 00:16:53,000 Ohh... Ohh...
309 00:16:53,500 00:16:55,000 Dan was right, of course. Dan was right, of course.
310 00:16:55,000 00:16:57,500 The robbing from the rich and giving to the poor The robbing from the rich and giving to the poor
311 00:16:57,500 00:17:00,000 wasn't easy like in Robin Hood's day. wasn't easy like in Robin Hood's day.
312 00:17:00,000 00:17:02,500 I could use help with the stamps. I could use help with the stamps.
313 00:17:02,500 00:17:04,500 I used to deposit so much money I used to deposit so much money
314 00:17:04,500 00:17:06,000 in so many people's bank accounts, in so many people's bank accounts,
315 00:17:06,000 00:17:09,000 we could spend all afternoon mailing out receipts. we could spend all afternoon mailing out receipts.
316 00:17:14,500 00:17:15,500 [ crunch ] [ crunch ]
317 00:17:15,500 00:17:17,500 [ air escaping ] [ air escaping ]
318 00:17:17,500 00:17:19,500 Oh, look. Oh, look.
319 00:17:19,500 00:17:23,000 I been shot in the lung again. I been shot in the lung again.
320 00:17:25,500 00:17:27,000 [ wheezing ] [ wheezing ]
321 00:17:27,000 00:17:28,000 [ hissing ] [ hissing ]
322 00:17:28,000 00:17:31,000 [ wheezing ] [ wheezing ]
323 00:17:31,000 00:17:32,500 Of course, that was nothing Of course, that was nothing
324 00:17:32,500 00:17:34,500 compared with my dad. compared with my dad.
325 00:17:35,500 00:17:37,000 He was still listed He was still listed
326 00:17:37,000 00:17:39,500 in the guinness book of world records in the guinness book of world records
327 00:17:39,500 00:17:41,500 as the world's most frequently shot human being. as the world's most frequently shot human being.
328 00:17:42,000 00:17:43,000 You're very lucky. You're very lucky.
329 00:17:43,500 00:17:46,500 You've got your father's bulletproof constitution. You've got your father's bulletproof constitution.
330 00:17:48,000 00:17:51,000 A little lower, I think, Uncle Dan. A little lower, I think, Uncle Dan.
331 00:17:51,000 00:17:52,500 [ clang clang ] [ clang clang ]
332 00:17:52,500 00:17:55,000 That's it. That's it.
333 00:17:55,000 00:17:56,500 OK. Ready? OK. Ready?
334 00:17:56,500 00:17:57,500 Yep. Yep.
335 00:17:57,500 00:17:58,500 [ thunk ] [ thunk ]
336 00:17:58,500 00:18:00,000 [ pop ] [ pop ]
337 00:18:01,000 00:18:03,000 Band-aids. Band-aids.
338 00:18:08,500 00:18:10,500 [ air escaping ] [ air escaping ]
339 00:18:11,000 00:18:13,000 Ah, thanks. Ah, thanks.
340 00:18:13,000 00:18:15,500 [ air escaping ] [ air escaping ]
341 00:18:17,000 00:18:19,000 [ escaping air stops ] [ escaping air stops ]
342 00:18:19,000 00:18:21,000 Whew! Whew!
343 00:18:27,500 00:18:29,000 I gotta do something I gotta do something
344 00:18:29,000 00:18:32,000 about getting shot all the time. about getting shot all the time.
345 00:18:32,000 00:18:33,000 [ clang ] [ clang ]
346 00:18:33,000 00:18:34,500 And there it was-- And there it was--
347 00:18:34,500 00:18:38,000 a bulletproof garbage can. a bulletproof garbage can.
348 00:18:40,000 00:18:41,500 - Aah! - Aah! - Aah! - Aah!
349 00:18:42,500 00:18:44,000 Come on, Ned. It's happy hour. Come on, Ned. It's happy hour.
350 00:18:44,000 00:18:45,000 Pass the beer. Pass the beer.
351 00:18:45,000 00:18:47,000 [ laughing and shouting ] [ laughing and shouting ]
352 00:18:57,500 00:18:58,000 [ rooster crows ] [ rooster crows ]
353 00:19:05,000 00:19:06,500 Hurry up, Ned. Hurry up, Ned.
354 00:19:06,500 00:19:09,500 Banks close at 5:00, you know. Banks close at 5:00, you know.
355 00:19:11,500 00:19:13,500 [ hiccup and burp ] [ hiccup and burp ]
356 00:19:25,500 00:19:27,500 [ snoring ] [ snoring ]
357 00:19:29,500 00:19:31,500 [ whistles ] [ whistles ]
358 00:19:34,000 00:19:35,500 Morning, Dog. Morning, Dog.
359 00:19:36,500 00:19:37,500 Ready? Ready?
360 00:19:39,000 00:19:40,500 Corn flakes. Corn flakes.
361 00:19:40,500 00:19:42,500 [ barking ] [ barking ]
362 00:19:43,000 00:19:44,500 No, fella. No, fella.
363 00:19:44,500 00:19:46,000 Corn... Corn...
364 00:19:46,000 00:19:47,000 flakes. flakes.
365 00:19:47,500 00:19:48,500 Corn flakes. Corn flakes.
366 00:19:48,500 00:19:49,500 Come on. Come on.
367 00:19:49,500 00:19:50,500 Talk. Talk.
368 00:19:50,500 00:19:51,500 [ woof woof ] [ woof woof ]
369 00:19:51,500 00:19:53,000 [ woof ] [ woof ]
370 00:19:53,500 00:19:55,000 Keep practicing. Keep practicing.
371 00:19:55,000 00:19:56,500 [ horn honks ] [ horn honks ]
372 00:20:00,500 00:20:02,000 [ honk ] [ honk ]
373 00:20:34,500 00:20:35,500 Heh. Heh.
374 00:20:39,500 00:20:40,500 Mr. Kelly. Mr. Kelly.
375 00:20:41,000 00:20:42,500 - Yes! - Yes! - Yes! - Yes! - Yes! - Yes!
376 00:20:42,500 00:20:44,000 We're all Kellys, mate. We're all Kellys, mate.
377 00:20:44,000 00:20:46,500 You have a letter. You have a letter.
378 00:20:46,500 00:20:48,000 A letter? A letter?
379 00:20:48,000 00:20:49,500 A letter? A letter?
380 00:20:51,000 00:20:53,500 [ talking and shouting ] [ talking and shouting ]
381 00:20:53,500 00:20:55,000 [ woof ] [ woof ]
382 00:20:58,000 00:20:59,500 [ whoosh ] [ whoosh ]
383 00:21:01,500 00:21:03,500 "The International Trust Bank "The International Trust Bank
384 00:21:03,500 00:21:06,000 "will be acting as Sole Agent for the sale of... "will be acting as Sole Agent for the sale of...
385 00:21:06,500 00:21:07,500 Reckless Island." Reckless Island."
386 00:21:07,500 00:21:09,000 - What? - What? - What? - What?
387 00:21:10,500 00:21:12,500 According to this document, According to this document,
388 00:21:12,500 00:21:15,000 our island is going to be relocated to... our island is going to be relocated to...
389 00:21:15,000 00:21:17,000 Tokyo Bay, Japan. Tokyo Bay, Japan.
390 00:21:17,000 00:21:19,000 What? What?
391 00:21:20,000 00:21:21,500 I loathe this weather. I loathe this weather.
392 00:21:21,500 00:21:23,000 I loathe this country. I loathe this country.
393 00:21:23,000 00:21:24,500 Quite right, Sir John. Quite right, Sir John.
394 00:21:25,000 00:21:27,500 Ah, for a cold, Foggy, drizzly english morning, eh? Ah, for a cold, Foggy, drizzly english morning, eh?
395 00:21:28,000 00:21:30,000 I reckon this flag needs a slight modification. I reckon this flag needs a slight modification.
396 00:21:30,500 00:21:32,000 What the hell's going on in here? What the hell's going on in here?
397 00:21:34,500 00:21:37,000 That's the British flag! That's the British flag!
398 00:21:38,500 00:21:40,000 Take it back to Britain. Take it back to Britain.
399 00:21:40,000 00:21:41,500 You're a larrikin, Kelly. You're a larrikin, Kelly.
400 00:21:41,500 00:21:44,500 You have absolutely no respect for authority. You have absolutely no respect for authority.
401 00:21:50,000 00:21:50,500 You're not selling our island. You're not selling our island.
402 00:21:51,000 00:21:52,500 There's obviously an informer There's obviously an informer
403 00:21:52,500 00:21:54,000 working somewhere in the bank. working somewhere in the bank.
404 00:21:57,500 00:21:58,500 Hmm? Hmm?
405 00:21:59,500 00:22:02,500 Well, they won't be working here for long. Well, they won't be working here for long.
406 00:22:02,500 00:22:05,000 We've brought in every birth certificate We've brought in every birth certificate
407 00:22:05,000 00:22:08,500 of every Kelly who was born on Reckless Island. of every Kelly who was born on Reckless Island.
408 00:22:09,500 00:22:10,500 Yeah. Yeah.
409 00:22:11,000 00:22:13,500 They go back quite a long way. They go back quite a long way.
410 00:22:13,500 00:22:16,000 It proves that the Kellys have lived there It proves that the Kellys have lived there
411 00:22:16,500 00:22:18,000 in one form or another in one form or another
412 00:22:18,500 00:22:20,500 for at least 40,000 years. for at least 40,000 years.
413 00:22:21,500 00:22:23,000 The first person The first person
414 00:22:23,000 00:22:25,000 to land on the island to land on the island
415 00:22:25,000 00:22:28,000 was an aborigine named Awaba Kelly. was an aborigine named Awaba Kelly.
416 00:22:31,000 00:22:33,500 This here's his birth certificate. This here's his birth certificate.
417 00:22:33,500 00:22:35,000 So what. So what.
418 00:22:36,500 00:22:38,500 That makes Reckless Island That makes Reckless Island
419 00:22:38,500 00:22:41,000 Kelly Tribal Land. Kelly Tribal Land.
420 00:22:42,000 00:22:45,500 So us Kellys legally have first right of purchase. So us Kellys legally have first right of purchase.
421 00:22:45,500 00:22:49,000 Fine, but... you'll have to match Fine, but... you'll have to match
422 00:22:49,000 00:22:54,000 the japanese offer of $1 million. the japanese offer of $1 million.
423 00:22:54,000 00:22:55,000 No problem. No problem.
424 00:22:55,000 00:22:56,000 Oh, really? Oh, really?
425 00:22:56,000 00:22:58,000 You'll never raise the cash. You'll never raise the cash.
426 00:22:58,000 00:23:00,000 Aren't you forgetting something, mate? Aren't you forgetting something, mate?
427 00:23:00,000 00:23:02,000 The Kelly Gang robs banks. The Kelly Gang robs banks.
428 00:23:02,000 00:23:04,000 Yes, but the Kelly Gang Yes, but the Kelly Gang
429 00:23:04,000 00:23:07,000 gives all its money to the poor. gives all its money to the poor.
430 00:23:08,500 00:23:10,000 Ahem. Ahem.
431 00:23:14,000 00:23:17,000 We were in deep trouble, all right, We were in deep trouble, all right,
432 00:23:17,000 00:23:19,000 so we headed to the Brewery so we headed to the Brewery
433 00:23:19,000 00:23:20,500 to do some thinking. to do some thinking.
434 00:23:20,500 00:23:22,500 It was there that I found out It was there that I found out
435 00:23:23,000 00:23:24,500 this wasn't the first time this wasn't the first time
436 00:23:25,000 00:23:26,500 Reckless Island had been under threat. Reckless Island had been under threat.
437 00:23:27,000 00:23:28,000 Legend has it Legend has it
438 00:23:28,500 00:23:30,000 that it's about an ancient battle that it's about an ancient battle
439 00:23:30,500 00:23:32,500 in which the first inhabitants saved the island in which the first inhabitants saved the island
440 00:23:32,500 00:23:34,500 from evil invaders. from evil invaders.
441 00:23:34,500 00:23:36,500 No kidding. No kidding.
442 00:23:36,500 00:23:39,500 It's all part of aboriginal mythology-- It's all part of aboriginal mythology--
443 00:23:40,000 00:23:42,000 you know, Ned-- the dreaming. you know, Ned-- the dreaming.
444 00:23:42,500 00:23:44,500 I suppose it doesn't make any sense I suppose it doesn't make any sense
445 00:23:45,000 00:23:46,500 in the modern world. in the modern world.
446 00:23:47,500 00:23:49,500 If we could make it make sense, If we could make it make sense,
447 00:23:50,000 00:23:51,500 maybe everything that doesn't make sense maybe everything that doesn't make sense
448 00:23:52,000 00:23:53,500 would make sense, eh? would make sense, eh?
449 00:23:53,500 00:23:55,000 Ah, you do enough dreaming Ah, you do enough dreaming
450 00:23:55,000 00:23:57,000 for everyone around here. for everyone around here.
451 00:24:02,000 00:24:05,500 [ whooshing ] [ whooshing ]
452 00:24:05,500 00:24:08,500 [ roaring ] [ roaring ]
453 00:24:08,500 00:24:12,000 [ rumbling ] [ rumbling ]
454 00:24:12,500 00:24:14,500 [ crashing ] [ crashing ]
455 00:24:28,500 00:24:30,500 [ clunk ] [ clunk ]
456 00:24:45,000 00:24:47,500 [ rooster crows ] [ rooster crows ]
457 00:24:53,000 00:24:55,500 Slept in again, eh? Slept in again, eh?
458 00:24:55,500 00:24:57,500 Yes. He was up all night. Yes. He was up all night.
459 00:24:57,500 00:25:00,000 I think he was building something. I think he was building something.
460 00:25:04,000 00:25:06,000 # Wild thing # # Wild thing #
461 00:25:07,500 00:25:10,500 # You make my heart sing # # You make my heart sing #
462 00:25:11,500 00:25:16,000 # You make everything groovy # # You make everything groovy #
463 00:25:16,000 00:25:19,000 # Oh, wild thing, yes # # Oh, wild thing, yes #
464 00:25:28,000 00:25:31,000 What are you doing with that can on your head? What are you doing with that can on your head?
465 00:25:31,000 00:25:34,000 I'm going bank robbing. I'm going bank robbing.
466 00:25:34,000 00:25:37,000 You go robbing a bank in that garbage can outfit. You go robbing a bank in that garbage can outfit.
467 00:25:37,000 00:25:38,500 You'll wreck the entire image You'll wreck the entire image
468 00:25:38,500 00:25:39,500 of the Kelly Gang. of the Kelly Gang.
469 00:25:39,500 00:25:41,500 What are you wearing it for? What are you wearing it for?
470 00:25:46,000 00:25:49,500 So I don't get shot. Aah! So I don't get shot. Aah!
471 00:25:52,500 00:25:55,000 With a bulletproof armor suit, With a bulletproof armor suit,
472 00:25:55,000 00:25:58,000 I can rob a lot of bank real fast I can rob a lot of bank real fast
473 00:25:58,000 00:25:59,500 and buy the island back. and buy the island back.
474 00:26:00,000 00:26:02,500 Any money the Kelly Gang gets in this country. Any money the Kelly Gang gets in this country.
475 00:26:02,500 00:26:05,500 Belongs to the people of this country. Belongs to the people of this country.
476 00:26:05,500 00:26:08,000 Why don't we rob banks in another country? Why don't we rob banks in another country?
477 00:26:08,000 00:26:10,000 I'm telling you, for an outlaw, I'm telling you, for an outlaw,
478 00:26:10,000 00:26:12,000 America is the land of opportunity. America is the land of opportunity.
479 00:26:12,500 00:26:14,000 Even a little kid knows Even a little kid knows
480 00:26:14,000 00:26:16,000 that in America when people rob banks. that in America when people rob banks.
481 00:26:16,500 00:26:18,500 They get to keep all the money themselves. They get to keep all the money themselves.
482 00:26:18,500 00:26:21,000 You've been looking at too many movies. You've been looking at too many movies.
483 00:26:21,000 00:26:25,000 Look, there's only one way to save this island. Look, there's only one way to save this island.
484 00:26:25,000 00:26:28,500 It's called Free Enterprise. It's called Free Enterprise.
485 00:26:29,000 00:26:33,500 [ star-spangled banner plays ] [ star-spangled banner plays ]
486 00:26:33,500 00:26:37,000 Suddenly, I was on my way to the USA, Suddenly, I was on my way to the USA,
487 00:26:37,000 00:26:38,500 home of bank-robbing legends home of bank-robbing legends
488 00:26:38,500 00:26:40,500 like Jesse James, Bonnie and Clyde, like Jesse James, Bonnie and Clyde,
489 00:26:41,000 00:26:42,500 and the Hollywood Outlaw. and the Hollywood Outlaw.
490 00:26:51,000 00:26:53,000 Uh... Uh...
491 00:26:54,000 00:26:58,000 What's the purpose of your trip to the United States? What's the purpose of your trip to the United States?
492 00:26:58,500 00:26:59,500 Business. Business.
493 00:27:14,500 00:27:16,500 Hold your fire! Hold your fire!
494 00:27:19,000 00:27:22,500 Your accountants had hidden talents. Your accountants had hidden talents.
495 00:27:24,000 00:27:28,500 So, what's this big discovery of yours? So, what's this big discovery of yours?
496 00:27:28,500 00:27:30,500 Ned Kelly has left the gang Ned Kelly has left the gang
497 00:27:31,000 00:27:33,000 and gone to America. and gone to America.
498 00:27:33,000 00:27:35,000 Why would he go there? Why would he go there?
499 00:27:35,000 00:27:36,500 Money. Money.
500 00:27:37,000 00:27:39,000 Yes, of course. Yes, of course.
501 00:27:39,500 00:27:40,500 [ sniff ] [ sniff ]
502 00:27:41,000 00:27:43,500 He's out of steal the million dollars He's out of steal the million dollars
503 00:27:43,500 00:27:46,000 to buy Reckless Island himself. to buy Reckless Island himself.
504 00:27:46,000 00:27:50,000 Now he's all alone in a foreign country. Now he's all alone in a foreign country.
505 00:27:50,500 00:27:52,500 Think I'll pay him a visit. Think I'll pay him a visit.
506 00:28:03,000 00:28:06,500 Be careful! You mustn't use a gun yourself. Be careful! You mustn't use a gun yourself.
507 00:28:06,500 00:28:08,000 We're an International Bank. We're an International Bank.
508 00:28:08,000 00:28:11,000 We can't afford to be incriminated in America. We can't afford to be incriminated in America.
509 00:28:11,000 00:28:14,500 That's right. I'm a bank executive now. That's right. I'm a bank executive now.
510 00:28:15,500 00:28:16,500 Does, uh... Does, uh...
511 00:28:16,500 00:28:19,500 that mean I get to fly in the corporate jet? that mean I get to fly in the corporate jet?
512 00:28:19,500 00:28:22,000 [ snoring loudly ] [ snoring loudly ]
513 00:28:23,000 00:28:26,000 [ clucking ] [ clucking ]
514 00:28:34,500 00:28:37,500 "The lion, dying, thrusteth forth his paw "The lion, dying, thrusteth forth his paw
515 00:28:38,000 00:28:39,000 "and wounds the Earth, "and wounds the Earth,
516 00:28:39,500 00:28:42,000 "nothing else with rage to be o'erpowered. "nothing else with rage to be o'erpowered.
517 00:28:42,000 00:28:45,000 "And wilt thou, pupil-like, take the correction? "And wilt thou, pupil-like, take the correction?
518 00:28:45,000 00:28:47,000 "Mildly kiss the rod "Mildly kiss the rod
519 00:28:47,000 00:28:50,000 "and fawn on rage with base humility, "and fawn on rage with base humility,
520 00:28:50,000 00:28:52,000 which art alive..." which art alive..."
521 00:28:52,000 00:28:53,500 [ snort ] [ snort ]
522 00:28:53,500 00:28:56,000 "in the king of beasts?" "in the king of beasts?"
523 00:28:58,000 00:28:59,500 [ sigh ] [ sigh ]
524 00:29:07,000 00:29:10,000 "Good night, good night, "Good night, good night,
525 00:29:10,000 00:29:13,500 parting is such sweet Sorrow." parting is such sweet Sorrow."
526 00:29:13,500 00:29:14,500 Sorrow. Sorrow.
527 00:29:15,000 00:29:18,000 Such sweet Sorrow. Such sweet Sorrow.
528 00:29:18,000 00:29:21,500 "Parting is such sweet Sorrow. "Parting is such sweet Sorrow.
529 00:29:21,500 00:29:24,500 Good night. Good night." Good night. Good night."
530 00:29:24,500 00:29:26,000 G'day. G'day.
531 00:29:29,000 00:29:31,000 What are you doing here? What are you doing here?
532 00:29:31,000 00:29:32,500 I'm going to America. I'm going to America.
533 00:29:33,000 00:29:34,000 What for? What for?
534 00:29:34,000 00:29:37,000 Rob a few banks. Rob a few banks.
535 00:29:37,000 00:29:39,500 They say guys who carry guns They say guys who carry guns
536 00:29:39,500 00:29:41,500 have a serious personality deficiency. have a serious personality deficiency.
537 00:29:42,000 00:29:42,500 Huh? Huh?
538 00:29:43,000 00:29:46,000 It's a prop, a tool, a crutch. It's a prop, a tool, a crutch.
539 00:29:46,000 00:29:48,500 If you know anything about bank robbing, If you know anything about bank robbing,
540 00:29:48,500 00:29:51,500 you'd know you need a gun. you'd know you need a gun.
541 00:29:54,000 00:29:57,000 Lucky this seat was empty, eh? Lucky this seat was empty, eh?
542 00:29:59,500 00:30:02,500 What are you doing up here, anyway? What are you doing up here, anyway?
543 00:30:03,000 00:30:04,500 Actually, I got fired Actually, I got fired
544 00:30:04,500 00:30:06,500 for trying to save an island. for trying to save an island.
545 00:30:06,500 00:30:08,000 No kidding. No kidding.
546 00:30:08,500 00:30:11,000 That's exactly what I'm trying to do. That's exactly what I'm trying to do.
547 00:30:11,000 00:30:12,500 Someone from your bank Someone from your bank
548 00:30:12,500 00:30:15,000 sent us a copy of a fax which-- sent us a copy of a fax which--
549 00:30:15,000 00:30:16,500 It was you. It was you.
550 00:30:18,000 00:30:19,500 Thanks. Thanks.
551 00:30:19,500 00:30:21,500 You're welcome. You're welcome.
552 00:30:23,000 00:30:25,000 Nice pair of dolphins. Nice pair of dolphins.
553 00:30:25,000 00:30:26,500 Hmm? Hmm?
554 00:30:28,500 00:30:31,500 Uh, yeah. I think I'll go back to my book now. Uh, yeah. I think I'll go back to my book now.
555 00:30:31,500 00:30:34,500 Look, I'm really sorry you lost your job. Look, I'm really sorry you lost your job.
556 00:30:36,000 00:30:37,000 Well... Well...
557 00:30:37,500 00:30:40,000 I wasn't cut out for banking anyway. I wasn't cut out for banking anyway.
558 00:30:40,000 00:30:43,000 Maybe it was the best thing that could have happened. Maybe it was the best thing that could have happened.
559 00:30:43,000 00:30:44,500 Hmm. Hmm.
560 00:30:44,500 00:30:47,500 Looks like we're heading to the same place. Looks like we're heading to the same place.
561 00:30:48,500 00:30:51,500 Uh... no. No, um, Uh... no. No, um,
562 00:30:51,500 00:30:54,000 I'm changing planes in LA, going on to England. I'm changing planes in LA, going on to England.
563 00:30:54,500 00:30:56,500 I'm auditioning for a new drama school I'm auditioning for a new drama school
564 00:30:56,500 00:30:58,000 at Stratford-upon-avon. at Stratford-upon-avon.
565 00:30:58,000 00:30:59,500 Are you an actress? Are you an actress?
566 00:30:59,500 00:31:02,000 Well... someday. Well... someday.
567 00:31:07,000 00:31:08,500 Got a boyfriend? Got a boyfriend?
568 00:31:09,500 00:31:12,000 Um, over the past few years, Um, over the past few years,
569 00:31:12,000 00:31:16,000 spending every night with Shakespeare for me was Norm. spending every night with Shakespeare for me was Norm.
570 00:31:20,000 00:31:22,500 Norm who? Norm who?
571 00:31:35,500 00:31:37,500 # Get your motor runnin' # # Get your motor runnin' #
572 00:31:39,000 00:31:42,000 # Get out on the highway # # Get out on the highway #
573 00:31:42,000 00:31:44,500 Lookin' for adventure # Lookin' for adventure #
574 00:31:44,500 00:31:49,000 # And whatever comes our way # # And whatever comes our way #
575 00:31:49,000 00:31:52,500 # In the town they call the big apple # # In the town they call the big apple #
576 00:31:52,500 00:31:56,000 # Take the world in a love embrace... # # Take the world in a love embrace... #
577 00:31:57,000 00:31:58,500 [ honk ] [ honk ]
578 00:31:59,000 00:32:00,500 Hey! Wrong way, buddy! Hey! Wrong way, buddy!
579 00:32:00,500 00:32:01,500 Watch out! Watch out!
580 00:32:01,500 00:32:04,500 You're on the wrong side of the road! You're on the wrong side of the road!
581 00:32:04,500 00:32:08,000 # We were born, born to be wild # # We were born, born to be wild #
582 00:32:08,500 00:32:10,000 # We hit town so hard... # # We hit town so hard... #
583 00:32:10,000 00:32:12,500 Excuse me. I'm looking for Hollywood. Excuse me. I'm looking for Hollywood.
584 00:32:13,000 00:32:14,500 There's a sign. There's a sign.
585 00:32:14,500 00:32:16,000 It is written. It is written.
586 00:32:16,000 00:32:19,500 # Born to be wild # # Born to be wild #
587 00:32:23,000 00:32:27,000 # Born to be wild # # Born to be wild #
588 00:32:33,000 00:32:34,000 [ siren ] [ siren ]
589 00:32:34,000 00:32:36,000 [ gunshots ] [ gunshots ]
590 00:32:37,000 00:32:38,500 We got you surrounded! We got you surrounded!
591 00:32:39,000 00:32:40,500 Aah! Aah!
592 00:32:40,500 00:32:42,500 Drop the money, lady! Drop the money, lady!
593 00:32:46,500 00:32:48,000 I'll cover you. Get on. I'll cover you. Get on.
594 00:32:48,500 00:32:51,500 I'm not getting on that thing. It's filthy. I'm not getting on that thing. It's filthy.
595 00:32:51,500 00:32:53,500 [ engine groaning ] [ engine groaning ]
596 00:32:55,500 00:32:57,500 [ plop ] [ plop ]
597 00:33:00,000 00:33:02,000 Hey. That money's not real. Hey. That money's not real.
598 00:33:06,000 00:33:08,000 And that bank's not real. And that bank's not real.
599 00:33:09,500 00:33:11,000 Hang on. Hang on.
600 00:33:11,000 00:33:12,500 I know who you are. I know who you are.
601 00:33:12,500 00:33:15,000 You're the Hollywood Outlaw! You're the Hollywood Outlaw!
602 00:33:16,000 00:33:17,500 Cut it, Lyle. Cut it, Lyle.
603 00:33:17,500 00:33:19,000 Cut! Cut!
604 00:33:19,000 00:33:22,000 Sorry. We'll have to go again, everybody. Sorry. We'll have to go again, everybody.
605 00:33:22,000 00:33:24,000 Can I... Can I...
606 00:33:24,000 00:33:26,000 have your autograph? have your autograph?
607 00:33:26,000 00:33:27,500 [ sigh ] [ sigh ]
608 00:33:28,000 00:33:29,500 [ man's voice ] Mr. Delance! [ man's voice ] Mr. Delance!
609 00:33:29,500 00:33:31,000 I'm sorry, Chuck. I'm sorry, Chuck.
610 00:33:31,000 00:33:33,000 I have no idea how this happened. I have no idea how this happened.
611 00:33:33,000 00:33:35,000 Wait a minute. Wait a minute.
612 00:33:35,000 00:33:37,500 You're a bloke. You're a bloke.
613 00:33:38,000 00:33:39,000 Get those camera ready? Get those camera ready?
614 00:33:39,000 00:33:40,500 Rocket-head here rides up Rocket-head here rides up
615 00:33:40,500 00:33:42,500 and says, "Get on the bike." and says, "Get on the bike."
616 00:33:42,500 00:33:44,500 Well, I'm an actor, Well, I'm an actor,
617 00:33:44,500 00:33:47,000 and that's a stuntman's job. and that's a stuntman's job.
618 00:33:47,000 00:33:49,000 Hey. We'll shoot it over. Hey. We'll shoot it over.
619 00:33:49,000 00:33:51,000 You're looking great, Chuck. You're looking great, Chuck.
620 00:33:51,000 00:33:54,500 I can't perform anymore. I'm just too upset. I can't perform anymore. I'm just too upset.
621 00:33:54,500 00:33:57,500 Oh, for crying out loud. Oh, for crying out loud.
622 00:33:57,500 00:34:00,000 I don't care who your agent is. I don't care who your agent is.
623 00:34:00,000 00:34:01,500 I'll see that you never work I'll see that you never work
624 00:34:02,000 00:34:03,000 in this town again. in this town again.
625 00:34:03,500 00:34:04,500 Who is this guy, anyway, Who is this guy, anyway,
626 00:34:05,000 00:34:07,500 Tin Man from The Wizard of OZ? Tin Man from The Wizard of OZ?
627 00:34:07,500 00:34:09,000 The name's Kelly. The name's Kelly.
628 00:34:13,500 00:34:16,000 Ned Kelly. Ned Kelly.
629 00:34:16,500 00:34:18,000 [ singing ] [ singing ]
630 00:34:18,500 00:34:21,500 I thought I must have landed on another planet. I thought I must have landed on another planet.
631 00:34:21,500 00:34:23,000 Banks weren't banks, money wasn't money, Banks weren't banks, money wasn't money,
632 00:34:23,500 00:34:27,000 and my favorite actress turned out to be a man. and my favorite actress turned out to be a man.
633 00:34:27,000 00:34:28,000 To save Reckless Island, To save Reckless Island,
634 00:34:28,500 00:34:31,500 I needed to find a real bank, and fast. I needed to find a real bank, and fast.
635 00:34:39,000 00:34:44,000 # You're tormented by the futility of life # # You're tormented by the futility of life #
636 00:34:44,500 00:34:46,500 # But I can see the stars # # But I can see the stars #
637 00:34:46,500 00:34:48,500 # From a million miles # # From a million miles #
638 00:34:49,000 00:34:52,500 # Are you out there somewhere? # # Are you out there somewhere? #
639 00:34:53,500 00:34:55,000 [ clunk ] [ clunk ]
640 00:34:55,500 00:34:59,000 Hey, man, where'd you get that pile of junk? Hey, man, where'd you get that pile of junk?
641 00:34:59,500 00:35:01,500 Check out the metal-head. Check out the metal-head.
642 00:35:01,500 00:35:03,500 What are you, undercover cop? What are you, undercover cop?
643 00:35:03,500 00:35:05,500 FBI? CIA? FBI? CIA?
644 00:35:05,500 00:35:07,500 Bank robber. Bank robber.
645 00:35:12,500 00:35:14,500 All right. All right.
646 00:35:17,000 00:35:18,500 Ahem. Ahem.
647 00:35:18,500 00:35:19,500 Good evening! Good evening!
648 00:35:20,000 00:35:22,500 How may we help you... Masked Man? How may we help you... Masked Man?
649 00:35:25,500 00:35:27,500 Well, if you're the loan arranger, Well, if you're the loan arranger,
650 00:35:27,500 00:35:29,500 just hand over a million bucks. just hand over a million bucks.
651 00:35:30,000 00:35:32,500 You're more than welcome to what we've got. You're more than welcome to what we've got.
652 00:35:34,000 00:35:35,500 We've got a weird one We've got a weird one
653 00:35:35,500 00:35:38,000 holding up the Hollywood friendly bank. holding up the Hollywood friendly bank.
654 00:35:38,000 00:35:40,500 Throw it up on the big screen. Throw it up on the big screen.
655 00:35:47,500 00:35:49,000 That's him. That's him.
656 00:35:49,500 00:35:52,000 But be very careful, Lieutenant. But be very careful, Lieutenant.
657 00:35:52,500 00:35:54,000 The most dangerous place on Earth The most dangerous place on Earth
658 00:35:54,000 00:35:57,000 is between Ned Kelly and a bag of money. is between Ned Kelly and a bag of money.
659 00:35:57,000 00:35:59,500 Would you like a line of credit? Would you like a line of credit?
660 00:35:59,500 00:36:00,500 A credit account? A credit account?
661 00:36:01,000 00:36:01,500 Credit card? Credit card?
662 00:36:02,000 00:36:02,500 Cash. Cash.
663 00:36:03,000 00:36:03,750 OK. OK.
664 00:36:04,500 00:36:08,000 Please, fill out this application form. Please, fill out this application form.
665 00:36:08,500 00:36:10,000 What for? What for?
666 00:36:10,000 00:36:12,500 We don't get much call for cash. We don't get much call for cash.
667 00:36:12,500 00:36:13,500 We have to order some. We have to order some.
668 00:36:14,000 00:36:16,000 Sure I can't fix you up with plastic? Sure I can't fix you up with plastic?
669 00:36:16,500 00:36:20,000 Sam, your dinner's ready. Sam, your dinner's ready.
670 00:36:20,000 00:36:23,500 But, Mom, it's a total fiasco. But, Mom, it's a total fiasco.
671 00:36:24,000 00:36:26,000 This is where he shoots the guns This is where he shoots the guns
672 00:36:26,000 00:36:27,500 out fo the actors' hands, out fo the actors' hands,
673 00:36:27,500 00:36:30,000 with real bullets, for God's sake. with real bullets, for God's sake.
674 00:36:30,000 00:36:33,000 Those cops are supposed to be winning. Those cops are supposed to be winning.
675 00:36:33,000 00:36:36,000 Look at that jerk. He's ruined the Climax. Look at that jerk. He's ruined the Climax.
676 00:36:36,500 00:36:38,000 He screwed up the movie. He screwed up the movie.
677 00:36:38,000 00:36:39,500 I like him. I like him.
678 00:36:39,500 00:36:40,500 What? What?
679 00:36:41,000 00:36:42,000 He's a damn sight better. He's a damn sight better.
680 00:36:42,500 00:36:44,500 Than those ham actors you hire. Than those ham actors you hire.
681 00:36:44,500 00:36:46,000 Get a load of Chuck. Get a load of Chuck.
682 00:36:46,000 00:36:47,000 Mr. Delance! Mr. Delance!
683 00:36:48,500 00:36:50,500 Are you sure this gentleman Are you sure this gentleman
684 00:36:50,500 00:36:52,500 is doing an unrehearsed performance? is doing an unrehearsed performance?
685 00:36:53,000 00:36:54,000 Absolutely. Absolutely.
686 00:36:54,000 00:36:55,500 He's an animal. He's an animal.
687 00:36:55,500 00:36:57,000 That's what I thought. That's what I thought.
688 00:36:57,000 00:36:58,500 You better sign him up. You better sign him up.
689 00:36:59,000 00:37:00,500 Sign him up? Sign him up?
690 00:37:00,500 00:37:03,000 Of course. What did you say his name was? Of course. What did you say his name was?
691 00:37:03,000 00:37:05,000 Uh... Kelly. Fred Kelly. Uh... Kelly. Fred Kelly.
692 00:37:05,500 00:37:08,000 No, no, no. Ned Kelly. No, no, no. Ned Kelly.
693 00:37:08,000 00:37:11,500 Kelly. One of the great show business names. Kelly. One of the great show business names.
694 00:37:11,500 00:37:14,000 Gene Kelly, Grace Kelly. Gene Kelly, Grace Kelly.
695 00:37:14,500 00:37:16,000 No kidding. No kidding.
696 00:37:17,000 00:37:18,500 I'd better find this guy I'd better find this guy
697 00:37:18,500 00:37:21,000 before some other studio nabs him. before some other studio nabs him.
698 00:37:21,000 00:37:22,500 How'd the bank robbery go? How'd the bank robbery go?
699 00:37:23,000 00:37:26,000 He signed you up for a credit card, right? He signed you up for a credit card, right?
700 00:37:26,500 00:37:27,500 Right. Right.
701 00:37:27,500 00:37:29,000 [ clang ] [ clang ]
702 00:37:29,000 00:37:31,500 Listen, man, I'll give you some free advice. Listen, man, I'll give you some free advice.
703 00:37:31,500 00:37:33,500 Forget that bank-robbing gig. Forget that bank-robbing gig.
704 00:37:33,500 00:37:36,000 The best way to get rich quick The best way to get rich quick
705 00:37:36,000 00:37:39,000 is do what all the smart people are doing. is do what all the smart people are doing.
706 00:37:39,500 00:37:41,500 You got to get yourself into... You got to get yourself into...
707 00:37:41,500 00:37:43,000 the entertainment business! the entertainment business!
708 00:37:43,500 00:37:45,500 Ned, baby! Ned, baby!
709 00:37:45,500 00:37:48,000 # In Hollywood, you'll steal the show # # In Hollywood, you'll steal the show #
710 00:37:48,500 00:37:51,500 # It's not what you do, it's who you know # # It's not what you do, it's who you know #
711 00:37:51,500 00:37:54,500 # The girls, the bucks, you'll have 'em all # # The girls, the bucks, you'll have 'em all #
712 00:37:54,500 00:37:57,500 # When you're a star, they'll return your call # # When you're a star, they'll return your call #
713 00:37:57,500 00:37:59,500 # If you can just handle the fame # # If you can just handle the fame #
714 00:38:00,000 00:38:03,000 # Ned Kelly will be a household name # # Ned Kelly will be a household name #
715 00:38:03,000 00:38:04,500 # You'll be riding in your limo # # You'll be riding in your limo #
716 00:38:05,000 00:38:06,000 # You'll be flying in your jet # # You'll be flying in your jet #
717 00:38:06,000 00:38:08,500 # Your name up in lights, your foot's in cement # # Your name up in lights, your foot's in cement #
718 00:38:08,500 00:38:10,000 Jeepers, it's the cops. Jeepers, it's the cops.
719 00:38:10,000 00:38:11,500 # We'll trim your nose, we'll lift your butt # # We'll trim your nose, we'll lift your butt #
720 00:38:12,000 00:38:14,500 # If you turn to flab, we'll liposuck # # If you turn to flab, we'll liposuck #
721 00:38:14,500 00:38:16,000 Officers, ready to fire. Officers, ready to fire.
722 00:38:16,000 00:38:19,000 # If you can just handle the fame # # If you can just handle the fame #
723 00:38:19,000 00:38:21,000 # Ned Kelly # # Ned Kelly #
724 00:38:21,000 00:38:25,000 # Will be a household # # Will be a household #
725 00:38:25,500 00:38:27,000 # Son of a gun lovin', fun lovin' # # Son of a gun lovin', fun lovin' #
726 00:38:27,000 00:38:28,000 # Bike ridin' # # Bike ridin' #
727 00:38:28,500 00:38:30,000 # Bike ridin'... heartbreaker # # Bike ridin'... heartbreaker #
728 00:38:30,000 00:38:31,500 # Big faker # # Big faker #
729 00:38:31,500 00:38:34,000 # Ned Kelly # # Ned Kelly #
730 00:38:34,000 00:38:39,500 # Will be a household name # # Will be a household name #
731 00:38:39,500 00:38:41,500 Nice jacket. Nice jacket.
732 00:38:41,500 00:38:43,000 You're under arrest. You're under arrest.
733 00:38:43,000 00:38:44,500 Hand over the guns, buddy, Hand over the guns, buddy,
734 00:38:44,500 00:38:46,000 or you'll be wearing metal or you'll be wearing metal
735 00:38:46,000 00:38:47,500 inside your head. inside your head.
736 00:38:47,500 00:38:50,000 Hey, cop, America's a free country. Hey, cop, America's a free country.
737 00:38:50,000 00:38:52,500 Every person has the right to bear arms. Every person has the right to bear arms.
738 00:38:52,500 00:38:54,000 Yeah. Yeah.
739 00:38:56,500 00:39:00,500 You're about to be shot dead on Nationwide television. You're about to be shot dead on Nationwide television.
740 00:39:01,500 00:39:05,000 No TV network would stoop so low. No TV network would stoop so low.
741 00:39:05,000 00:39:08,500 Welcome to News Kill, live. Welcome to News Kill, live.
742 00:39:08,500 00:39:10,000 I'm here on Hollywood Boulevard, I'm here on Hollywood Boulevard,
743 00:39:10,000 00:39:13,500 where some wacko with a trash can on his head where some wacko with a trash can on his head
744 00:39:13,500 00:39:16,500 is about to be blasted to pieces by the Hollywood police, is about to be blasted to pieces by the Hollywood police,
745 00:39:16,500 00:39:18,500 right before your very eyes. right before your very eyes.
746 00:39:18,500 00:39:20,500 [ cocking guns ] [ cocking guns ]
747 00:39:20,500 00:39:22,500 OK, men, don't take any chances. OK, men, don't take any chances.
748 00:39:23,500 00:39:26,000 Put two bullets apiece in his head, Put two bullets apiece in his head,
749 00:39:26,000 00:39:27,500 then we'll break for doughnuts. then we'll break for doughnuts.
750 00:39:27,500 00:39:29,000 Hey, what's the problem, Officer? Hey, what's the problem, Officer?
751 00:39:29,500 00:39:32,000 This guy's an international bank robber. This guy's an international bank robber.
752 00:39:32,000 00:39:36,000 He's not a bank robber. He's an actor. He's not a bank robber. He's an actor.
753 00:39:36,500 00:39:37,500 Huh? Huh?
754 00:39:37,500 00:39:38,500 An actor? An actor?
755 00:39:39,000 00:39:41,000 OK, boys, he's just an actor. OK, boys, he's just an actor.
756 00:39:41,500 00:39:43,000 Let's go. Let's go.
757 00:39:44,000 00:39:45,500 An actor? An actor?
758 00:39:45,500 00:39:47,500 That's right. And legally, That's right. And legally,
759 00:39:47,500 00:39:51,000 Hollywood police can't shoot actors. Hollywood police can't shoot actors.
760 00:39:51,500 00:39:53,000 If the police start shooting actors, If the police start shooting actors,
761 00:39:53,500 00:39:55,000 then the studios will close down. then the studios will close down.
762 00:39:55,500 00:39:57,500 If that happens, there's no more movies. If that happens, there's no more movies.
763 00:39:57,500 00:39:59,000 With no more movies, With no more movies,
764 00:39:59,000 00:40:01,000 people have got nothing to believe in. people have got nothing to believe in.
765 00:40:01,500 00:40:03,000 Everyone gets depressed, Everyone gets depressed,
766 00:40:03,000 00:40:04,500 no one goes to work, no one goes to work,
767 00:40:04,500 00:40:06,500 and the economy collapses. and the economy collapses.
768 00:40:06,500 00:40:08,500 Yes, yes. That's very sad. Yes, yes. That's very sad.
769 00:40:08,500 00:40:10,000 Now find me some people Now find me some people
770 00:40:10,000 00:40:12,000 who can shoot actors. who can shoot actors.
771 00:40:14,000 00:40:15,000 I had to admit I had to admit
772 00:40:15,000 00:40:17,000 that as an international bank robber, that as an international bank robber,
773 00:40:17,000 00:40:18,000 I'd been a failure. I'd been a failure.
774 00:40:18,500 00:40:20,500 The only way to save the island now The only way to save the island now
775 00:40:21,000 00:40:23,000 was to pretend I was an actor. was to pretend I was an actor.
776 00:40:23,500 00:40:24,500 Ned, Ned,
777 00:40:25,000 00:40:27,500 delance pictures is into action movies-- delance pictures is into action movies--
778 00:40:27,500 00:40:31,500 you know, macho heroes, sex, violence. you know, macho heroes, sex, violence.
779 00:40:31,500 00:40:32,500 High turnover. High turnover.
780 00:40:32,500 00:40:34,000 Big profits. Big profits.
781 00:40:34,500 00:40:37,500 The quality of our movies is so high The quality of our movies is so high
782 00:40:37,500 00:40:41,000 that they bypass the theaters completely that they bypass the theaters completely
783 00:40:41,000 00:40:44,500 and go straight to video. and go straight to video.
784 00:40:44,500 00:40:46,000 Wow! Wow!
785 00:40:46,500 00:40:48,000 Do you want to know the secret Do you want to know the secret
786 00:40:48,500 00:40:51,000 to making big money in video rental? to making big money in video rental?
787 00:40:51,000 00:40:53,000 The answer is one word-- The answer is one word--
788 00:40:53,000 00:40:54,500 guns. guns.
789 00:40:54,500 00:40:57,500 You see, guns aren't just guns. You see, guns aren't just guns.
790 00:40:57,500 00:40:58,500 They're a... They're a...
791 00:40:58,500 00:41:00,000 Phallic symbol. Phallic symbol.
792 00:41:00,000 00:41:02,000 Yeah. Yeah.
793 00:41:02,000 00:41:05,000 The bigger the gun, the bigger the profit. The bigger the gun, the bigger the profit.
794 00:41:05,500 00:41:07,500 Now, I know what you're thinking. Now, I know what you're thinking.
795 00:41:07,500 00:41:10,000 Let me tell you what you're thinking. Let me tell you what you're thinking.
796 00:41:10,000 00:41:13,500 You're thinking, how will I turn a nobody like you You're thinking, how will I turn a nobody like you
797 00:41:13,500 00:41:14,500 into a big star? into a big star?
798 00:41:15,000 00:41:16,500 Well, it's simple. Well, it's simple.
799 00:41:17,000 00:41:18,500 We're going to build you We're going to build you
800 00:41:19,000 00:41:22,000 the biggest goddamn gun in Hollywood. the biggest goddamn gun in Hollywood.
801 00:41:22,000 00:41:24,000 But, Sam, aren't you forgetting something? But, Sam, aren't you forgetting something?
802 00:41:24,500 00:41:28,500 Over 60% of video renters are women. Over 60% of video renters are women.
803 00:41:29,500 00:41:31,000 Mom's right. Mom's right.
804 00:41:31,000 00:41:34,000 What the heck do the women want to see? What the heck do the women want to see?
805 00:41:34,000 00:41:36,000 Women want a love story. Women want a love story.
806 00:41:36,000 00:41:38,500 A love story... A love story...
807 00:41:38,500 00:41:41,000 with a big gun. with a big gun.
808 00:41:41,000 00:41:42,500 Brilliant. Brilliant.
809 00:41:42,500 00:41:44,000 It's got everything. It's got everything.
810 00:41:44,500 00:41:46,500 Ned, to be a movie star here, Ned, to be a movie star here,
811 00:41:46,500 00:41:49,000 you have to talk like an american. you have to talk like an american.
812 00:41:49,000 00:41:51,500 For a million bucks, I'll talk like a martian. For a million bucks, I'll talk like a martian.
813 00:41:52,000 00:41:54,500 A million bucks? A million bucks?
814 00:41:54,500 00:41:57,000 [ buzzing ] [ buzzing ]
815 00:42:00,500 00:42:02,000 Hmm. Hmm.
816 00:42:04,000 00:42:06,000 Tell you what I'll do. Tell you what I'll do.
817 00:42:06,000 00:42:07,500 When the movie's finished, When the movie's finished,
818 00:42:07,500 00:42:10,500 I'll pay you 1 million bucks. I'll pay you 1 million bucks.
819 00:42:10,500 00:42:12,500 You got a deal. You got a deal.
820 00:42:12,500 00:42:16,500 Mom, if we can just find the right actress Mom, if we can just find the right actress
821 00:42:16,500 00:42:19,500 to play opposite Ned... to play opposite Ned...
822 00:42:20,000 00:42:22,500 then every lovesick couple, then every lovesick couple,
823 00:42:22,500 00:42:24,500 every lonely guy and gal, every lonely guy and gal,
824 00:42:25,000 00:42:27,000 every family in America every family in America
825 00:42:27,000 00:42:31,500 will be saying, "Let's rent a video!" will be saying, "Let's rent a video!"
826 00:42:31,500 00:42:34,000 It's going to be a great movie. It's going to be a great movie.
827 00:42:34,000 00:42:35,000 It's called... It's called...
828 00:42:35,500 00:42:37,500 The Christian Cowboy. The Christian Cowboy.
829 00:42:38,000 00:42:40,000 It's about a gunslinging stranger It's about a gunslinging stranger
830 00:42:40,000 00:42:41,500 who cleans up Las Vegas who cleans up Las Vegas
831 00:42:41,500 00:42:45,500 and falls in love with a beautiful nun. and falls in love with a beautiful nun.
832 00:42:45,500 00:42:47,500 Look, I could be accepted Look, I could be accepted
833 00:42:47,500 00:42:51,000 into the newest Shakespearean drama school in England. into the newest Shakespearean drama school in England.
834 00:42:51,000 00:42:52,500 I won't throw that away I won't throw that away
835 00:42:52,500 00:42:55,500 to be in some totally crass movie. to be in some totally crass movie.
836 00:42:55,500 00:42:57,000 Bye. I got to run. Bye. I got to run.
837 00:42:57,000 00:42:59,500 With your help, we can buy Reckless Island With your help, we can buy Reckless Island
838 00:42:59,500 00:43:01,500 and save it from ecological disaster. and save it from ecological disaster.
839 00:43:01,500 00:43:04,500 You mean... You mean...
840 00:43:04,500 00:43:07,500 if I do this movie with you, if I do this movie with you,
841 00:43:07,500 00:43:09,500 it'll save your wilderness? it'll save your wilderness?
842 00:43:09,500 00:43:12,000 It's the only chance we've got. It's the only chance we've got.
843 00:43:12,000 00:43:13,000 Look, Look,
844 00:43:13,000 00:43:15,000 the head of the studio told me the head of the studio told me
845 00:43:15,500 00:43:18,000 he's got the best writer in Hollywood he's got the best writer in Hollywood
846 00:43:18,000 00:43:19,000 working on the script, working on the script,
847 00:43:19,500 00:43:21,500 so it'll probably be like Shakespeare. so it'll probably be like Shakespeare.
848 00:43:21,500 00:43:24,000 Christian Cowboy, take 1. Christian Cowboy, take 1.
849 00:43:24,000 00:43:27,000 # I want to thank my Jesus for the way that I feel # # I want to thank my Jesus for the way that I feel #
850 00:43:27,000 00:43:30,500 # I'm so full of religion I just can't be still # # I'm so full of religion I just can't be still #
851 00:43:30,500 00:43:32,500 # I want to sing it and shout it # # I want to sing it and shout it #
852 00:43:33,000 00:43:34,000 # And let the people know # # And let the people know #
853 00:43:34,500 00:43:36,000 # That I'm saved by his mercy # # That I'm saved by his mercy #
854 00:43:36,500 00:43:38,000 # And I'm ready to go # # And I'm ready to go #
855 00:43:38,000 00:43:39,500 # That's why I'm happy # # That's why I'm happy #
856 00:43:39,500 00:43:40,500 # Yes, I'm happy # # Yes, I'm happy #
857 00:43:40,500 00:43:42,000 # Happy on my way # # Happy on my way #
858 00:43:42,000 00:43:43,500 # Rejoicing and singing # # Rejoicing and singing #
859 00:43:44,000 00:43:45,000 # His praises every dails # # His praises every dails #
860 00:43:45,500 00:43:49,000 # For Jesus is near me, and there he will stay # # For Jesus is near me, and there he will stay #
861 00:43:49,000 00:43:50,500 # That's why I'm happy # # That's why I'm happy #
862 00:43:50,500 00:43:54,000 # Yes, I'm happy, happy on my way # # Yes, I'm happy, happy on my way #
863 00:43:54,500 00:43:56,500 I repeat-- I repeat--
864 00:43:56,500 00:44:00,000 repent, sinners! repent, sinners!
865 00:44:02,500 00:44:05,000 Jesus said... Jesus said...
866 00:44:06,000 00:44:10,500 gambling is Satan's tool. gambling is Satan's tool.
867 00:44:11,000 00:44:15,500 Beware of the work of the devil, Beware of the work of the devil,
868 00:44:15,500 00:44:18,500 or your souls will burn in the fires of hell! or your souls will burn in the fires of hell!
869 00:44:19,000 00:44:20,500 Hey! Hey!
870 00:44:21,000 00:44:24,500 Look, dudes! Ha ha ha! Look, dudes! Ha ha ha!
871 00:44:24,500 00:44:29,500 It's the Christian Cowboy! It's the Christian Cowboy!
872 00:44:30,000 00:44:32,000 [ all laughing ] [ all laughing ]
873 00:44:35,500 00:44:37,000 Hah! Hah!
874 00:44:37,000 00:44:38,500 [ all stop laughing ] [ all stop laughing ]
875 00:44:40,000 00:44:42,500 The word of the lord The word of the lord
876 00:44:42,500 00:44:45,000 is the only way to your salvation. is the only way to your salvation.
877 00:44:45,000 00:44:47,000 [ gunshots ] [ gunshots ]
878 00:44:53,500 00:44:55,500 [ cocking guns ] [ cocking guns ]
879 00:45:00,000 00:45:03,000 Prayer time, sinners! Prayer time, sinners!
880 00:45:03,000 00:45:04,000 Aah! Aah!
881 00:45:04,000 00:45:05,000 - Ow! - Aah! - Ow! - Aah!
882 00:45:05,000 00:45:06,500 Aah! Aah!
883 00:45:10,500 00:45:12,000 Uhh... Uhh...
884 00:45:12,000 00:45:15,000 [ bell tolls ] [ bell tolls ]
885 00:45:15,000 00:45:17,500 That's one way of doing it, I guess. That's one way of doing it, I guess.
886 00:45:18,000 00:45:19,500 Oh, Reverend. Oh, Reverend.
887 00:45:20,000 00:45:21,500 I thank the lord I thank the lord
888 00:45:22,000 00:45:26,500 you brought that... big gun to town. you brought that... big gun to town.
889 00:45:28,500 00:45:30,000 Ma'am, Ma'am,
890 00:45:30,500 00:45:33,000 you're a fine-lookin' nun. you're a fine-lookin' nun.
891 00:45:36,000 00:45:39,000 You better get thee to a nunnery. You better get thee to a nunnery.
892 00:45:44,000 00:45:45,000 Love this! Love this!
893 00:45:45,000 00:45:46,500 Cut it, Lyle. Cut it, Lyle.
894 00:45:46,500 00:45:49,500 Freeze, Mr. Kelly. Music down. Freeze, Mr. Kelly. Music down.
895 00:45:49,500 00:45:52,000 Turning off the blue screen. Turning off the blue screen.
896 00:45:57,500 00:45:58,500 Cut! Cut!
897 00:45:58,500 00:46:00,000 [ buzzer ] [ buzzer ]
898 00:46:00,000 00:46:03,500 That's-- that's a wrap for day one. That's-- that's a wrap for day one.
899 00:46:03,500 00:46:05,500 Call tomorrow, 6am. Call tomorrow, 6am.
900 00:46:06,000 00:46:07,500 Fantastic. Fantastic.
901 00:46:07,500 00:46:09,000 Robin, you're a natural. Robin, you're a natural.
902 00:46:09,000 00:46:12,000 Ned, what's the scoop with your ad lib line-- Ned, what's the scoop with your ad lib line--
903 00:46:12,000 00:46:14,000 "Better get thee to a nunnery"? "Better get thee to a nunnery"?
904 00:46:14,000 00:46:16,000 It was Robin's idea. It was Robin's idea.
905 00:46:16,000 00:46:18,000 Uh, it's hamlet's line to Ophelia. Uh, it's hamlet's line to Ophelia.
906 00:46:18,500 00:46:19,500 It's classic Shakespeare. It's classic Shakespeare.
907 00:46:20,000 00:46:22,500 Who the hell's Shakespeare? Who the hell's Shakespeare?
908 00:46:22,500 00:46:25,500 He's only the greatest english writer of all time. He's only the greatest english writer of all time.
909 00:46:26,000 00:46:28,500 Well, he'd better have an american work permit. Well, he'd better have an american work permit.
910 00:46:28,500 00:46:30,000 I don't want union trouble. I don't want union trouble.
911 00:46:30,000 00:46:33,000 He died 400 years ago. He died 400 years ago.
912 00:46:33,000 00:46:35,500 I thought it sounded stale. I thought it sounded stale.
913 00:46:35,500 00:46:37,500 Let's stick to Bernie's script. Let's stick to Bernie's script.
914 00:46:38,000 00:46:40,000 You're on another winner, Bernie. You're on another winner, Bernie.
915 00:46:40,000 00:46:43,500 Thanks. I'm adding some extra violence. Thanks. I'm adding some extra violence.
916 00:46:45,000 00:46:47,000 If it's 400 years old, If it's 400 years old,
917 00:46:47,000 00:46:51,500 that means legally all his stuff is out of copyright. that means legally all his stuff is out of copyright.
918 00:46:52,000 00:46:53,500 What are you saying? What are you saying?
919 00:46:53,500 00:46:55,000 It's free. It's free.
920 00:46:57,000 00:46:58,000 Hey, Bernie, Hey, Bernie,
921 00:46:58,500 00:46:59,500 on second thought, on second thought,
922 00:46:59,500 00:47:02,500 there may be something to this Shakespeare stuff. there may be something to this Shakespeare stuff.
923 00:47:02,500 00:47:04,500 Get some of his old scripts Get some of his old scripts
924 00:47:04,500 00:47:06,000 and freshen them up. and freshen them up.
925 00:47:33,500 00:47:34,000 [ crunch ] [ crunch ]
926 00:47:34,000 00:47:36,000 [ tuning up on bagpipes ] [ tuning up on bagpipes ]
927 00:47:51,000 00:47:52,500 Who are you? Who are you?
928 00:47:53,500 00:47:56,000 Big Mac... Big Mac...
929 00:47:56,000 00:47:57,500 Beth. Beth.
930 00:47:57,500 00:47:59,500 [ munch ] [ munch ]
931 00:48:01,000 00:48:02,500 To blow your head off To blow your head off
932 00:48:02,500 00:48:04,500 or... or...
933 00:48:04,500 00:48:07,000 not blow your head off-- not blow your head off--
934 00:48:07,000 00:48:09,500 that is the question. that is the question.
935 00:48:12,000 00:48:13,000 [ burp ] [ burp ]
936 00:48:14,000 00:48:17,000 That's the last of 'em. That's the last of 'em.
937 00:48:17,000 00:48:19,500 How can the sisters of Las Vegas How can the sisters of Las Vegas
938 00:48:19,500 00:48:21,500 ever repay you for cleanin' up ever repay you for cleanin' up
939 00:48:21,500 00:48:25,000 the rottenest town in the west? the rottenest town in the west?
940 00:48:25,000 00:48:26,000 Well, ma'am, Well, ma'am,
941 00:48:26,000 00:48:29,500 you could kick that habit and marry me. you could kick that habit and marry me.
942 00:48:30,500 00:48:33,000 Ohh, yes! Ohh, yes!
943 00:48:38,500 00:48:40,500 Amen. Amen.
944 00:48:44,000 00:48:45,000 Cut! Cut!
945 00:48:50,000 00:48:52,500 [ clanking ] [ clanking ]
946 00:49:00,500 00:49:02,000 Lost somethin'? Lost somethin'?
947 00:49:03,000 00:49:04,500 Yeah. Yeah.
948 00:49:04,500 00:49:06,500 My driver. My driver.
949 00:49:07,000 00:49:07,500 Where you headin'? Where you headin'?
950 00:49:08,000 00:49:09,500 To my hotel. To my hotel.
951 00:49:09,500 00:49:12,000 I'll give you a ride. I'll give you a ride.
952 00:49:13,000 00:49:13,750 OK. OK.
953 00:49:34,500 00:49:36,500 There you go. There you go.
954 00:49:38,000 00:49:40,000 Thanks, mister. Thanks, mister.
955 00:49:44,500 00:49:46,500 [ engine fails ] [ engine fails ]
956 00:49:49,000 00:49:50,500 No worries. No worries.
957 00:49:54,000 00:49:54,750 Oh! Oh!
958 00:49:58,500 00:49:59,500 Climb on. Climb on.
959 00:50:02,000 00:50:04,500 # As love rides up # # As love rides up #
960 00:50:04,500 00:50:06,500 # It's though a lone ranger # # It's though a lone ranger #
961 00:50:06,500 00:50:08,500 # Changed you into somethin' # # Changed you into somethin' #
962 00:50:08,500 00:50:10,500 # Rich and strange # # Rich and strange #
963 00:50:10,500 00:50:12,500 # Stranger than fiction # # Stranger than fiction #
964 00:50:12,500 00:50:14,000 # Truth or the dare # # Truth or the dare #
965 00:50:14,000 00:50:16,000 # I say, when you come down # # I say, when you come down #
966 00:50:16,000 00:50:18,500 # You say, come down from where? # # You say, come down from where? #
967 00:50:18,500 00:50:22,000 # Riding to the future would be easy for you # # Riding to the future would be easy for you #
968 00:50:22,000 00:50:26,000 # To fall into your heart would be easy to do # # To fall into your heart would be easy to do #
969 00:50:26,500 00:50:32,000 # Love doesn't come as you like it # # Love doesn't come as you like it #
970 00:50:34,000 00:50:36,500 # Love your rocket dreams # # Love your rocket dreams #
971 00:50:36,500 00:50:38,500 # Repossess your soul... # # Repossess your soul... #
972 00:50:42,500 00:50:48,500 # Love doesn't come as you like it # # Love doesn't come as you like it #
973 00:50:50,500 00:50:52,500 # Ain't no other Cupids # # Ain't no other Cupids #
974 00:50:52,500 00:50:54,000 # Arrow can't go through # # Arrow can't go through #
975 00:50:54,500 00:50:56,500 # No woman is an island # # No woman is an island #
976 00:50:56,500 00:50:58,000 # Not even you # # Not even you #
977 00:50:58,000 00:51:01,000 # Standin' here together... # # Standin' here together... #
978 00:51:01,000 00:51:03,000 Thanks for the ride. Thanks for the ride.
979 00:51:03,500 00:51:06,500 I'll see you. In makeup. Ciao. I'll see you. In makeup. Ciao.
980 00:51:06,500 00:51:08,000 Oh, wait. Oh, wait.
981 00:51:08,000 00:51:10,000 Why don't I lend you this? Why don't I lend you this?
982 00:51:10,500 00:51:11,000 Thanks. Thanks.
983 00:51:11,500 00:51:12,500 I got to go. I got to go.
984 00:51:12,500 00:51:13,500 Bye. Bye.
985 00:51:13,500 00:51:15,000 Bye. Bye.
986 00:51:21,500 00:51:24,000 "All the world's a stage, "All the world's a stage,
987 00:51:24,000 00:51:28,000 and all the men and women merely players." and all the men and women merely players."
988 00:51:29,500 00:51:31,000 "They have their exits "They have their exits
989 00:51:31,000 00:51:33,000 and their entrances." and their entrances."
990 00:51:36,000 00:51:38,000 "And each person in time "And each person in time
991 00:51:38,500 00:51:41,000 plays many parts." plays many parts."
992 00:51:52,000 00:51:54,000 [ gunshots ] [ gunshots ]
993 00:51:54,500 00:51:57,500 [ Director's instructions on PA system ] [ Director's instructions on PA system ]
994 00:51:58,000 00:51:59,000 Wrap the set. Wrap the set.
995 00:51:59,000 00:52:02,000 OK, wrap it, and thank you. OK, wrap it, and thank you.
996 00:52:02,000 00:52:03,500 She'll sleep with anything. She'll sleep with anything.
997 00:52:03,500 00:52:04,500 She's sleeping with the director. She's sleeping with the director.
998 00:52:04,500 00:52:05,500 So am I. So am I.
999 00:52:05,500 00:52:07,000 What? What?
1000 00:52:08,500 00:52:10,000 Hollywood. Hollywood.
1001 00:52:10,000 00:52:11,000 What a place. What a place.
1002 00:52:11,000 00:52:13,000 One day you're a bank robber, One day you're a bank robber,
1003 00:52:13,000 00:52:15,500 the next day you're a movie star. the next day you're a movie star.
1004 00:52:16,000 00:52:18,500 All I had to do was finish the movie, All I had to do was finish the movie,
1005 00:52:19,000 00:52:20,000 and I'd have the money. and I'd have the money.
1006 00:52:20,000 00:52:23,000 I knew everyone back home had been countin' on me. I knew everyone back home had been countin' on me.
1007 00:52:23,000 00:52:26,000 It was time to tell 'em the good news. It was time to tell 'em the good news.
1008 00:52:38,000 00:52:40,500 [ intro music plays ] [ intro music plays ]
1009 00:52:40,500 00:52:42,500 Lights, camera, action! Lights, camera, action!
1010 00:52:43,000 00:52:44,000 You're the star You're the star
1011 00:52:44,000 00:52:46,000 of a happy Hollywood video letter. of a happy Hollywood video letter.
1012 00:52:46,500 00:52:48,000 Your 20 second starts... now. Your 20 second starts... now.
1013 00:52:48,000 00:52:49,000 Hi, Dan. Hi, Dan.
1014 00:52:49,000 00:52:50,500 Hi, Joe. Hi, Joe.
1015 00:52:58,500 00:53:00,000 Ooh. Ooh.
1016 00:53:03,500 00:53:05,500 Video letter. Video letter.
1017 00:53:07,500 00:53:08,500 What is it? What is it?
1018 00:53:08,500 00:53:09,500 Hmm. Hmm.
1019 00:53:18,500 00:53:21,500 [ intro music plays ] [ intro music plays ]
1020 00:53:21,500 00:53:23,000 Hi, Dan. Hi, Joe. Hi, Dan. Hi, Joe.
1021 00:53:23,000 00:53:24,500 It's Ned! It's Ned!
1022 00:53:24,500 00:53:25,500 [ woof woof ] [ woof woof ]
1023 00:53:25,500 00:53:27,500 I think he's wearing makeup. I think he's wearing makeup.
1024 00:53:27,500 00:53:31,500 You don't reckon he's turned kinky, do you? You don't reckon he's turned kinky, do you?
1025 00:53:31,500 00:53:32,500 Guess what. Guess what.
1026 00:53:32,500 00:53:34,500 I'm an actor. I'm an actor.
1027 00:53:36,000 00:53:37,000 Gee. Gee.
1028 00:53:37,000 00:53:39,000 The time's nearly up. The time's nearly up.
1029 00:53:39,000 00:53:41,000 Well... Well...
1030 00:53:41,000 00:53:42,500 I just wanted you blokes to know I just wanted you blokes to know
1031 00:53:42,500 00:53:44,500 that when I finish my movie, that when I finish my movie,
1032 00:53:44,500 00:53:47,000 I'll be gettin' 1 mi-- I'll be gettin' 1 mi--
1033 00:53:47,000 00:53:48,000 [ everybody groans ] [ everybody groans ]
1034 00:53:48,000 00:53:49,500 [ honks horn ] [ honks horn ]
1035 00:54:06,000 00:54:08,000 [ honk honk ] [ honk honk ]
1036 00:54:08,000 00:54:09,500 Get away. No photographs. Get away. No photographs.
1037 00:54:09,500 00:54:10,500 Shoo! Shoo!
1038 00:54:10,500 00:54:12,000 Come on, Ernie. Come on, Ernie.
1039 00:54:12,500 00:54:14,000 Let's get some autographs. Let's get some autographs.
1040 00:54:14,000 00:54:16,500 Any stars coming in this mornin'? Any stars coming in this mornin'?
1041 00:54:22,500 00:54:23,500 G'day, Ralph. G'day, Ralph.
1042 00:54:23,500 00:54:25,500 G'day, mate. Mr. Kelly. G'day, mate. Mr. Kelly.
1043 00:54:26,000 00:54:28,500 Can I have your autograph? Can I have your autograph?
1044 00:54:28,500 00:54:30,000 Sure. Sure.
1045 00:54:30,000 00:54:33,000 Please write, "To Hank." Please write, "To Hank."
1046 00:54:34,000 00:54:36,500 I really admire what you do. I really admire what you do.
1047 00:54:36,500 00:54:39,000 I could never be an actor. I could never be an actor.
1048 00:54:39,000 00:54:41,000 I'd be too afraid. I'd be too afraid.
1049 00:54:41,000 00:54:45,000 Uh, make mine out, "To Ernie." Uh, make mine out, "To Ernie."
1050 00:54:47,000 00:54:48,500 Ms. Banks, Ms. Banks,
1051 00:54:48,500 00:54:51,500 will you be moving into a secret Hollywood love nest, will you be moving into a secret Hollywood love nest,
1052 00:54:52,000 00:54:53,500 and if so, with who? and if so, with who?
1053 00:54:53,500 00:54:55,000 Hey! There he is! Hey! There he is!
1054 00:54:55,000 00:54:57,000 Where? Where? Where? Where?
1055 00:55:01,000 00:55:02,000 Ned... Ned...
1056 00:55:03,000 00:55:05,000 Do you like carrots? Do you like carrots?
1057 00:55:05,000 00:55:06,000 Yeah. Yeah.
1058 00:55:06,000 00:55:07,500 Mr. Kelly, don't you feel Mr. Kelly, don't you feel
1059 00:55:07,500 00:55:10,500 your gratuitous use of guns on screen your gratuitous use of guns on screen
1060 00:55:11,000 00:55:14,000 is helping to create a more dangerous society? is helping to create a more dangerous society?
1061 00:55:14,000 00:55:15,500 From an intellectual basis-- From an intellectual basis--
1062 00:55:15,500 00:55:17,000 Let me handle this. Let me handle this.
1063 00:55:17,000 00:55:19,500 Hey, smarty-pants, where you from? Hey, smarty-pants, where you from?
1064 00:55:19,500 00:55:20,500 New York. New York.
1065 00:55:20,500 00:55:22,500 - Oh! - Oh! - Oh! - Oh!
1066 00:55:22,500 00:55:24,000 Well, here in Hollywood, Well, here in Hollywood,
1067 00:55:24,000 00:55:25,500 it's personality questions only. it's personality questions only.
1068 00:55:25,500 00:55:26,500 Mr. Kelly, Mr. Kelly,
1069 00:55:27,000 00:55:30,000 what color underpants do you wear? what color underpants do you wear?
1070 00:55:32,500 00:55:34,000 Black. Black.
1071 00:55:34,000 00:55:35,000 Ooh! Ooh!
1072 00:55:35,000 00:55:37,000 Outrageous. Outrageous.
1073 00:55:37,000 00:55:39,000 You better get into makeup. You better get into makeup.
1074 00:55:39,000 00:55:41,500 I'd like to ask Mr. Kelly another question. I'd like to ask Mr. Kelly another question.
1075 00:55:41,500 00:55:42,500 Go take a meeting. Go take a meeting.
1076 00:55:43,000 00:55:44,500 Hey, buddy, watch your language. Hey, buddy, watch your language.
1077 00:55:44,500 00:55:45,500 Why don't you keep in touch? Why don't you keep in touch?
1078 00:55:45,500 00:55:47,000 You keep in touch. You keep in touch.
1079 00:55:47,000 00:55:48,000 You keep in touch. You keep in touch.
1080 00:55:48,500 00:55:49,500 You keep in touch! You keep in touch!
1081 00:55:49,500 00:55:51,000 You keep in touch! You keep in touch!
1082 00:55:51,000 00:55:52,500 No! No!
1083 00:55:52,500 00:55:54,000 You keep in touch! You keep in touch!
1084 00:55:54,500 00:55:56,000 I'm not gonna keep in touch, I'm not gonna keep in touch,
1085 00:55:56,500 00:55:59,500 'cause you can keep in touch! 'cause you can keep in touch!
1086 00:55:59,500 00:56:02,000 I got Ned Kelly's autograph. I got Ned Kelly's autograph.
1087 00:56:02,000 00:56:04,500 That wasn't Ned Kelly. That wasn't Ned Kelly.
1088 00:56:06,500 00:56:08,500 Who are you? Who are you?
1089 00:56:11,500 00:56:14,500 I'm the president of the Ned Kelly... I'm the president of the Ned Kelly...
1090 00:56:14,500 00:56:15,500 Fan Club. Fan Club.
1091 00:56:15,500 00:56:17,500 And that wasn't him. And that wasn't him.
1092 00:56:17,500 00:56:19,000 Who was it, then? Who was it, then?
1093 00:56:19,000 00:56:20,000 A thief. A thief.
1094 00:56:20,500 00:56:22,000 He stole Ned Kelly's identity. He stole Ned Kelly's identity.
1095 00:56:22,000 00:56:24,500 Well, he signed Ned Kelly's name. Well, he signed Ned Kelly's name.
1096 00:56:24,500 00:56:26,000 Yeah. He wrote mine, too. Yeah. He wrote mine, too.
1097 00:56:26,000 00:56:27,000 Look. "To Ernie." Look. "To Ernie."
1098 00:56:27,500 00:56:29,000 If he wrote your name, If he wrote your name,
1099 00:56:29,000 00:56:31,000 then he's stolen your identity, too. then he's stolen your identity, too.
1100 00:56:33,500 00:56:35,500 What do you mean? What do you mean?
1101 00:56:35,500 00:56:37,000 When your identity's been stolen, When your identity's been stolen,
1102 00:56:37,000 00:56:38,500 you're no longer yourself. you're no longer yourself.
1103 00:56:38,500 00:56:41,000 You've got no personality. You've got no personality.
1104 00:56:41,000 00:56:43,000 You're nobody. You're nobody.
1105 00:56:44,500 00:56:47,000 I want my identity back. I want my identity back.
1106 00:56:47,000 00:56:49,000 Automatic. Automatic.
1107 00:56:49,500 00:56:52,000 Silencer. Silencer.
1108 00:56:52,000 00:56:54,000 Semiautomatic. Semiautomatic.
1109 00:56:57,000 00:56:59,000 Price check. Price check.
1110 00:56:59,500 00:57:01,000 Man targets. Man targets.
1111 00:57:01,500 00:57:03,500 Regular size. Regular size.
1112 00:57:04,000 00:57:05,500 You have no choice. You have no choice.
1113 00:57:06,000 00:57:09,000 He's stolen your identity, aren't he? He's stolen your identity, aren't he?
1114 00:57:09,500 00:57:10,500 Maybe. I-- Maybe. I--
1115 00:57:11,000 00:57:13,000 I haven't been feeling myself lately. I haven't been feeling myself lately.
1116 00:57:13,500 00:57:17,000 Man target's on special-- 9.05! Man target's on special-- 9.05!
1117 00:57:17,000 00:57:18,500 That's the way they operate. That's the way they operate.
1118 00:57:19,000 00:57:20,500 We believe he's an alien, We believe he's an alien,
1119 00:57:21,000 00:57:22,500 possibly from another planet. possibly from another planet.
1120 00:57:22,500 00:57:24,500 [ siren ] [ siren ]
1121 00:57:28,500 00:57:30,500 It's time to make our move. It's time to make our move.
1122 00:57:30,500 00:57:32,000 Wib, are you prepared? Wib, are you prepared?
1123 00:57:32,000 00:57:34,000 Absolutely, Sir John. Absolutely, Sir John.
1124 00:57:34,000 00:57:36,000 My people here are fully trained. My people here are fully trained.
1125 00:57:36,000 00:57:38,000 All we need to do now All we need to do now
1126 00:57:38,000 00:57:41,500 is get our friend in a public place alone. is get our friend in a public place alone.
1127 00:57:44,000 00:57:47,000 Ned, the eyelashes are a big improvement. Ned, the eyelashes are a big improvement.
1128 00:57:47,000 00:57:49,000 You're looking great. You're looking great.
1129 00:57:53,500 00:57:55,500 By the way, By the way,
1130 00:57:55,500 00:57:58,500 the women want to see you wearing a mustache. the women want to see you wearing a mustache.
1131 00:57:58,500 00:58:00,500 [ loud bang ] [ loud bang ]
1132 00:58:00,500 00:58:01,500 Don't shoot, mister. Don't shoot, mister.
1133 00:58:02,000 00:58:04,000 It's only popcorn. It's only popcorn.
1134 00:58:06,000 00:58:09,000 Sorry. I thought you were going to shoot us. Sorry. I thought you were going to shoot us.
1135 00:58:09,000 00:58:11,000 Ned Kelly, one of these days Ned Kelly, one of these days
1136 00:58:11,000 00:58:13,500 you're going to kill somebody with this thing! you're going to kill somebody with this thing!
1137 00:58:14,000 00:58:15,000 Guns don't solve problems, Guns don't solve problems,
1138 00:58:15,500 00:58:16,500 they create them. they create them.
1139 00:58:16,500 00:58:17,500 You don't need a gun. You don't need a gun.
1140 00:58:17,500 00:58:18,500 You're addicted. You're addicted.
1141 00:58:19,000 00:58:20,000 You're a gun addict. You're a gun addict.
1142 00:58:20,000 00:58:22,000 [ gunshot ] [ gunshot ]
1143 00:58:24,500 00:58:26,000 I'm not addicted. I'm not addicted.
1144 00:58:26,000 00:58:28,000 I haven't fired a shot all day. I haven't fired a shot all day.
1145 00:58:28,500 00:58:31,000 I can give these things up anytime I want. I can give these things up anytime I want.
1146 00:58:31,000 00:58:32,500 Anytime at all. Anytime at all.
1147 00:58:43,000 00:58:45,000 [ gunshots ] [ gunshots ]
1148 00:58:48,000 00:58:50,000 Feels good. Feels good.
1149 00:58:59,000 00:59:00,000 Ah. Ah.
1150 00:59:00,500 00:59:03,000 Overstretched and undercapitalized. Overstretched and undercapitalized.
1151 00:59:03,000 00:59:04,000 Good. Good.
1152 00:59:05,500 00:59:06,500 Miss Twisty, Miss Twisty,
1153 00:59:07,000 00:59:10,000 let's send a fax. let's send a fax.
1154 00:59:10,000 00:59:12,000 A fax? A fax?
1155 00:59:14,000 00:59:17,000 This fax just came through. This fax just came through.
1156 00:59:18,000 00:59:20,000 I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.
1157 00:59:20,500 00:59:22,500 I can't pay you your money. I can't pay you your money.
1158 00:59:22,500 00:59:24,500 They've frozen our accounts. They've frozen our accounts.
1159 00:59:24,500 00:59:27,500 They've foreclosed on all his loans. They've foreclosed on all his loans.
1160 00:59:27,500 00:59:29,500 [ Delance ] They're going to sell us off. [ Delance ] They're going to sell us off.
1161 00:59:31,000 00:59:32,500 [ Robin ] Who's done this? [ Robin ] Who's done this?
1162 00:59:33,500 00:59:34,500 Our bank, of course. Our bank, of course.
1163 00:59:34,500 00:59:36,000 Bank? Bank?
1164 00:59:36,500 00:59:38,500 Which bank? Which bank?
1165 01:00:20,000 01:00:22,000 [ telephone rings ] [ telephone rings ]
1166 01:00:24,000 01:00:25,000 [ ring ring ] [ ring ring ]
1167 01:00:25,500 01:00:26,500 [ boom ] [ boom ]
1168 01:00:26,500 01:00:28,000 [ ring ring ] [ ring ring ]
1169 01:00:29,500 01:00:32,000 - Aah! - Aah! - Aah! - Aah!
1170 01:00:33,000 01:00:35,500 Come on, let's try again. Come on, let's try again.
1171 01:00:35,500 01:00:37,000 This is hopeless. This is hopeless.
1172 01:00:37,000 01:00:38,500 It's solid steel. It's solid steel.
1173 01:00:39,000 01:00:40,500 [ ring ring ] [ ring ring ]
1174 01:00:42,000 01:00:44,000 [ ring ring ] [ ring ring ]
1175 01:00:45,500 01:00:47,500 [ ring ring ] [ ring ring ]
1176 01:00:48,500 01:00:50,500 [ ring ring ] [ ring ring ]
1177 01:00:52,000 01:00:53,000 [ ring ring ] [ ring ring ]
1178 01:00:55,000 01:00:55,500 [ ring ] [ ring ]
1179 01:00:56,500 01:00:57,500 Hello? Hello?
1180 01:00:57,500 01:00:59,000 Hello? Hello?
1181 01:00:59,000 01:01:00,500 [ woof woof ] [ woof woof ]
1182 01:01:00,500 01:01:03,000 Dog, how are you? Dog, how are you?
1183 01:01:03,000 01:01:04,500 It's Ned. It's Ned.
1184 01:01:04,500 01:01:06,000 [ woof woof woof ] [ woof woof woof ]
1185 01:01:06,000 01:01:07,000 Slow down. Slow down.
1186 01:01:07,000 01:01:08,500 What are you doing? What are you doing?
1187 01:01:08,500 01:01:11,000 Talking to my dog. Talking to my dog.
1188 01:01:11,000 01:01:12,500 [ woof ] [ woof ]
1189 01:01:12,500 01:01:15,000 Now, listen. Listen to me carefully. Now, listen. Listen to me carefully.
1190 01:01:17,500 01:01:21,500 Where is Dan? Where is Dan?
1191 01:01:22,500 01:01:26,000 [ Corn... flakes ] [ Corn... flakes ]
1192 01:01:27,000 01:01:29,000 Good dog. Good dog.
1193 01:01:29,000 01:01:30,500 Is the dog talking back? Is the dog talking back?
1194 01:01:31,000 01:01:32,000 Sort of. Sort of.
1195 01:01:32,500 01:01:34,500 Stop kidding around, Dog. Stop kidding around, Dog.
1196 01:01:34,500 01:01:36,000 Where's Dan? Where's Dan?
1197 01:01:36,000 01:01:38,000 [ whimpers ] [ whimpers ]
1198 01:01:38,000 01:01:39,500 [ yelps ] [ yelps ]
1199 01:01:40,000 01:01:41,000 Dog? Dog?
1200 01:01:41,000 01:01:43,000 Dog? Dog?
1201 01:01:43,500 01:01:44,500 [ telephone rings ] [ telephone rings ]
1202 01:01:45,500 01:01:47,000 Hello? Hello?
1203 01:01:47,000 01:01:48,000 Dog? Dog?
1204 01:01:48,000 01:01:50,500 Ned, there's a call for you. Ned, there's a call for you.
1205 01:01:55,500 01:01:57,000 Hello? Hello?
1206 01:01:57,000 01:02:00,500 Just letting you know that if you're planning a trip home, Just letting you know that if you're planning a trip home,
1207 01:02:00,500 01:02:02,500 you'll need a Japanese Visa you'll need a Japanese Visa
1208 01:02:02,500 01:02:05,000 because I'm exporting Reckless Island because I'm exporting Reckless Island
1209 01:02:05,000 01:02:06,500 tomorrow. tomorrow.
1210 01:02:07,500 01:02:09,500 What's wrong? What's wrong?
1211 01:02:09,500 01:02:13,000 A bunch of blokes in gray suits are talking my home. A bunch of blokes in gray suits are talking my home.
1212 01:02:13,000 01:02:14,500 Organized crime. Organized crime.
1213 01:02:14,500 01:02:17,000 It's worse than that. It's worse than that.
1214 01:02:17,500 01:02:19,500 They're corporate bankers. They're corporate bankers.
1215 01:02:19,500 01:02:22,000 Here's your money, Ned. Here's your money, Ned.
1216 01:02:22,000 01:02:24,000 Holy cow. Holy cow.
1217 01:02:24,000 01:02:27,000 Mom's been laundering the company's money. Mom's been laundering the company's money.
1218 01:02:27,000 01:02:29,500 I knew that sooner or later, I knew that sooner or later,
1219 01:02:29,500 01:02:33,000 borrowing all that money would catch up with you, borrowing all that money would catch up with you,
1220 01:02:33,000 01:02:37,000 so I have been putting aside a little something each week. so I have been putting aside a little something each week.
1221 01:02:37,000 01:02:39,000 If you guys are broke, If you guys are broke,
1222 01:02:39,000 01:02:41,500 I couldn't take that money. I couldn't take that money.
1223 01:02:41,500 01:02:43,500 You must save your wilderness. You must save your wilderness.
1224 01:02:44,000 01:02:46,000 Ned, it's yours. You earned it. Ned, it's yours. You earned it.
1225 01:02:46,000 01:02:49,000 Besides, we need much more than $1 million Besides, we need much more than $1 million
1226 01:02:49,000 01:02:51,000 to save the studio. to save the studio.
1227 01:02:51,000 01:02:54,000 The only way we can stay in show business now The only way we can stay in show business now
1228 01:02:54,000 01:02:55,500 is to beat that bank. is to beat that bank.
1229 01:02:56,000 01:02:58,000 And no one has ever beaten a bank. And no one has ever beaten a bank.
1230 01:02:58,500 01:03:01,000 Well, there was a first time for everything. Well, there was a first time for everything.
1231 01:03:01,000 01:03:04,000 That bank was stealing my home. That bank was stealing my home.
1232 01:03:04,000 01:03:07,000 They'd hurt my friends and beaten up my dog. They'd hurt my friends and beaten up my dog.
1233 01:03:07,000 01:03:09,000 Enough was enough. Enough was enough.
1234 01:03:11,000 01:03:13,500 You're not coming. It's too dangerous. You're not coming. It's too dangerous.
1235 01:03:13,500 01:03:14,500 Mr. Kelly, Mr. Kelly,
1236 01:03:14,500 01:03:17,000 the flight to Australia is boarding immediately. the flight to Australia is boarding immediately.
1237 01:03:17,000 01:03:18,000 Better hurry. Better hurry.
1238 01:03:18,500 01:03:20,000 So don't bother arguing anymore. So don't bother arguing anymore.
1239 01:03:20,000 01:03:21,500 I'm not arguing anymore. I'm not arguing anymore.
1240 01:03:21,500 01:03:24,000 Will you give me a ticket, please? Will you give me a ticket, please?
1241 01:03:24,000 01:03:26,000 You two are traveling together? You two are traveling together?
1242 01:03:26,500 01:03:28,000 - No. - Yes. - No. - Yes.
1243 01:03:29,000 01:03:31,000 How nice. How nice.
1244 01:03:31,000 01:03:32,500 Try it again. Try it again.
1245 01:03:32,500 01:03:33,500 [ buzzer ] [ buzzer ]
1246 01:03:33,500 01:03:35,000 Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on.
1247 01:03:40,000 01:03:41,000 There. There.
1248 01:03:41,000 01:03:42,000 All right. All right.
1249 01:03:43,000 01:03:45,000 OK, you're all clear. OK, you're all clear.
1250 01:03:45,000 01:03:46,000 Thank you. Thank you.
1251 01:03:46,000 01:03:47,500 Have a nice flight. Have a nice flight.
1252 01:03:47,500 01:03:49,000 All right, next, please. All right, next, please.
1253 01:03:59,500 01:04:02,500 Oh, look, your fans came to say goodbye. Oh, look, your fans came to say goodbye.
1254 01:04:02,500 01:04:03,500 Hi. Hi.
1255 01:04:05,000 01:04:06,000 Kelly! Kelly!
1256 01:04:06,000 01:04:07,500 Bon voyage. Bon voyage.
1257 01:04:07,500 01:04:09,000 Fare time, alien. Fare time, alien.
1258 01:04:09,000 01:04:12,000 # I'd like to feel my finger on your trigger # # I'd like to feel my finger on your trigger #
1259 01:04:12,500 01:04:13,500 # Oh, yes # # Oh, yes #
1260 01:04:14,000 01:04:18,000 # I know that nobody can do to your heart # # I know that nobody can do to your heart #
1261 01:04:18,000 01:04:19,500 # Oh, yes # # Oh, yes #
1262 01:04:19,500 01:04:25,000 # Happiness is a warm gun, yes, it is # # Happiness is a warm gun, yes, it is #
1263 01:04:25,000 01:04:29,000 # Happiness is a warm gun, yes, it is # # Happiness is a warm gun, yes, it is #
1264 01:04:29,500 01:04:30,500 It's done. It's done.
1265 01:04:31,000 01:04:33,000 Two bullets point-blank range. Two bullets point-blank range.
1266 01:04:33,500 01:04:35,000 I'm on my way back. I'm on my way back.
1267 01:04:35,000 01:04:37,000 Good. Good.
1268 01:04:37,000 01:04:40,500 That's the last we'll see of Ned Kelly. That's the last we'll see of Ned Kelly.
1269 01:04:40,500 01:04:43,500 Hey, look! The bullets have hit the cross! Hey, look! The bullets have hit the cross!
1270 01:04:48,500 01:04:50,500 Amen. Amen.
1271 01:04:53,000 01:04:54,500 My plan was simple. My plan was simple.
1272 01:04:54,500 01:04:56,000 Give the bank the money Give the bank the money
1273 01:04:56,000 01:04:58,000 and kick them off the island. and kick them off the island.
1274 01:04:58,500 01:05:01,000 Anyway, I figured Sir John had to be bluffing. Anyway, I figured Sir John had to be bluffing.
1275 01:05:01,500 01:05:03,500 You can't export an island. You can't export an island.
1276 01:05:03,500 01:05:04,500 It's impossible. It's impossible.
1277 01:05:05,000 01:05:06,000 Charges have been laid Charges have been laid
1278 01:05:06,000 01:05:10,000 under the ocean and across the spit. under the ocean and across the spit.
1279 01:05:10,000 01:05:11,500 The explosions will fracture The explosions will fracture
1280 01:05:11,500 01:05:13,500 the rock strata beneath the surface, the rock strata beneath the surface,
1281 01:05:13,500 01:05:16,000 breaking the island off from the mainland. breaking the island off from the mainland.
1282 01:05:16,000 01:05:17,500 Then an ocean-going tugboat Then an ocean-going tugboat
1283 01:05:17,500 01:05:20,000 will simply tow it to Japan. will simply tow it to Japan.
1284 01:05:20,000 01:05:21,500 Won't the island just sink? Won't the island just sink?
1285 01:05:22,000 01:05:23,500 Not with the latest Japanese technology. Not with the latest Japanese technology.
1286 01:05:24,000 01:05:25,000 They've fitted the island They've fitted the island
1287 01:05:25,000 01:05:27,000 with a series of subsurface stabilizers with a series of subsurface stabilizers
1288 01:05:27,500 01:05:30,000 to provide it with flotation during the voyage. to provide it with flotation during the voyage.
1289 01:05:30,500 01:05:32,000 Well, it's really creating Well, it's really creating
1290 01:05:32,500 01:05:34,500 an offshore asset! an offshore asset!
1291 01:06:02,000 01:06:04,000 - Aah! - Aah! - Aah! - Aah!
1292 01:06:24,000 01:06:26,000 Hut-2, hut-2, hut-2, hut-2! Hut-2, hut-2, hut-2, hut-2!
1293 01:06:26,000 01:06:28,500 Hut-2, hut-2, hut-2, hut-2! Hut-2, hut-2, hut-2, hut-2!
1294 01:06:28,500 01:06:31,000 Hut-2, hut-2, hut-2, hut-2! Hut-2, hut-2, hut-2, hut-2!
1295 01:06:31,000 01:06:33,500 Gentlemen, up until now, Gentlemen, up until now,
1296 01:06:34,000 01:06:35,500 the best undeveloped real estate the best undeveloped real estate
1297 01:06:35,500 01:06:40,000 has been located in the most remote places on Earth. has been located in the most remote places on Earth.
1298 01:06:40,000 01:06:42,000 Our bank is about to prove Our bank is about to prove
1299 01:06:42,000 01:06:44,000 that cheap wilderness can be exported that cheap wilderness can be exported
1300 01:06:44,000 01:06:47,500 to the world's most wealthy industrialized countries. to the world's most wealthy industrialized countries.
1301 01:06:48,500 01:06:50,500 Aah! Aah!
1302 01:06:56,000 01:06:59,000 There's heavily armed bankers out there, and you've given up guns. There's heavily armed bankers out there, and you've given up guns.
1303 01:06:59,000 01:07:01,000 What can you do by yourself? What can you do by yourself?
1304 01:07:01,500 01:07:03,000 Trust me. Trust me.
1305 01:07:03,000 01:07:05,500 Ned, I might not ever see you again, Ned, I might not ever see you again,
1306 01:07:05,500 01:07:07,500 so whatever happens, I... so whatever happens, I...
1307 01:07:07,500 01:07:10,000 Robin, I know what I'm doing. Robin, I know what I'm doing.
1308 01:07:23,500 01:07:25,000 Now what? Now what?
1309 01:07:34,500 01:07:36,000 [ squeals ] [ squeals ]
1310 01:07:37,000 01:07:39,000 [ speaking Japanese ] [ speaking Japanese ]
1311 01:07:39,000 01:07:41,500 Yes, the island is yours. Yes, the island is yours.
1312 01:07:41,500 01:07:44,500 Sayonara! Sayonara!
1313 01:08:22,500 01:08:24,500 We're moving! We're moving!
1314 01:08:24,500 01:08:27,500 You've all done an excellent job. You've all done an excellent job.
1315 01:08:27,500 01:08:30,000 I'd like you to stay on board the island I'd like you to stay on board the island
1316 01:08:30,000 01:08:32,000 until it's safety reached international waters. until it's safety reached international waters.
1317 01:08:32,000 01:08:34,500 Fly me back to the bank. Fly me back to the bank.
1318 01:08:35,000 01:08:36,000 I'll refuel the helicopter, sir. I'll refuel the helicopter, sir.
1319 01:08:49,500 01:08:50,500 [ engine starts ] [ engine starts ]
1320 01:09:07,500 01:09:10,000 It's Ned Kelly! It's Ned Kelly!
1321 01:09:29,000 01:09:31,000 The island stopped moving! The island stopped moving!
1322 01:09:51,000 01:09:52,500 Aah! Aah!
1323 01:09:58,000 01:09:59,000 Shoot them both. Shoot them both.
1324 01:09:59,500 01:10:00,500 Fire! Fire!
1325 01:10:04,500 01:10:05,500 Inside! Quick! Inside! Quick!
1326 01:10:05,500 01:10:06,500 Ohh! Ohh!
1327 01:10:12,000 01:10:14,500 - Aah! - Aah! - Aah! - Aah!
1328 01:10:15,000 01:10:18,000 - Aah! - Aah! - Aah! - Aah!
1329 01:10:22,000 01:10:24,000 Aah! Aah!
1330 01:10:24,000 01:10:26,500 He's ricocheting bullets with that rubbish bin suit. He's ricocheting bullets with that rubbish bin suit.
1331 01:10:26,500 01:10:29,500 Put down your guns before you kill yourselves. Put down your guns before you kill yourselves.
1332 01:10:29,500 01:10:31,500 Ow! Ow!
1333 01:10:34,000 01:10:36,000 Ned. Ned.
1334 01:10:40,500 01:10:43,000 The pub's on fire. The pub's on fire.
1335 01:10:43,500 01:10:45,500 Ned's out there, and he's in trouble. Ned's out there, and he's in trouble.
1336 01:10:46,000 01:10:47,500 I can feel it. I can feel it.
1337 01:11:02,000 01:11:04,500 Wake up, Dan. Wake up, Dan.
1338 01:11:04,500 01:11:05,500 You're daydreaming. You're daydreaming.
1339 01:11:06,000 01:11:08,000 You're daydreaming. You're daydreaming... You're daydreaming. You're daydreaming...
1340 01:11:08,000 01:11:09,000 Yeah. Yeah.
1341 01:11:09,000 01:11:12,500 Day... dreaming. Day... dreaming.
1342 01:11:25,000 01:11:27,000 Aah! Aah!
1343 01:11:27,000 01:11:29,000 1... 1...
1344 01:11:33,500 01:11:38,500 - Aah! - Aah! - Aah! - Aah!
1345 01:11:40,000 01:11:42,000 Aim for his head! Aim for his head!
1346 01:11:52,000 01:11:53,500 Don't go out. It's suicide. Don't go out. It's suicide.
1347 01:11:53,500 01:11:55,000 We can't stay here either. We can't stay here either.
1348 01:11:55,500 01:11:58,000 Let's take all the beer we can carry Let's take all the beer we can carry
1349 01:11:58,000 01:12:00,500 and get out the back way. and get out the back way.
1350 01:12:00,500 01:12:02,500 You're not deserting Ned, are you? You're not deserting Ned, are you?
1351 01:12:02,500 01:12:04,500 Aim for his legs! Aim for his legs!
1352 01:12:04,500 01:12:06,000 Legs? Legs?
1353 01:12:21,000 01:12:23,500 We'll finish him off. We'll finish him off.
1354 01:12:24,000 01:12:25,500 Hold fire! Hold fire!
1355 01:12:27,000 01:12:31,000 We'll move in and shoot him in the head. We'll move in and shoot him in the head.
1356 01:12:35,000 01:12:36,500 Now! Now!
1357 01:12:48,500 01:12:51,000 - Aah! - Aah! - Aah! - Aah!
1358 01:13:26,500 01:13:28,500 [ woof ] [ woof ]
1359 01:13:28,500 01:13:30,000 I quit! I quit!
1360 01:13:30,000 01:13:31,000 I resign. I resign.
1361 01:13:31,000 01:13:32,500 My head hurts. My head hurts.
1362 01:13:33,500 01:13:36,000 Here's your money. Here's your money.
1363 01:13:38,000 01:13:40,500 Now get off our island. Now get off our island.
1364 01:13:43,000 01:13:44,500 Welcome home. Welcome home.
1365 01:13:47,500 01:13:48,500 Aah! Aah!
1366 01:13:51,500 01:13:53,000 Ha ha! Ha ha!
1367 01:13:53,000 01:13:56,000 You business people don't know when to stop. You business people don't know when to stop.
1368 01:13:56,000 01:13:59,500 Remove your helmet. Remove your helmet.
1369 01:14:10,000 01:14:13,500 Unless you have friends in Heaven, Kelly, Unless you have friends in Heaven, Kelly,
1370 01:14:13,500 01:14:16,000 you're out of luck. you're out of luck.
1371 01:14:29,000 01:14:31,500 Such is life. Such is life.
1372 01:14:31,500 01:14:33,500 [ roaring ] [ roaring ]
1373 01:14:46,000 01:14:47,500 Amen. Amen.
1374 01:14:54,500 01:14:57,000 It looks like you broke your dad's record It looks like you broke your dad's record
1375 01:14:57,000 01:14:58,500 for getting shot. for getting shot.
1376 01:14:58,500 01:15:00,500 Congratulations! Ha ha! Congratulations! Ha ha!
1377 01:15:09,000 01:15:11,000 Guns? Guns?
1378 01:15:11,000 01:15:14,000 Looks like the Kelly Gang's back in business. Looks like the Kelly Gang's back in business.
1379 01:15:14,000 01:15:15,500 Yeah... Yeah...
1380 01:15:15,500 01:15:17,000 show business. show business.
1381 01:15:24,500 01:15:26,500 # Oh, faith # # Oh, faith #
1382 01:15:27,500 01:15:30,500 # You've got to have faith # # You've got to have faith #
1383 01:15:32,500 01:15:34,000 # Oh, faith # # Oh, faith #
1384 01:15:35,500 01:15:38,000 # You've got to have faith # # You've got to have faith #
1385 01:15:39,500 01:15:41,500 When you think about it, When you think about it,
1386 01:15:41,500 01:15:43,000 what possible reason is there what possible reason is there
1387 01:15:43,000 01:15:46,000 for a grown man to need a gun? for a grown man to need a gun?
1388 01:15:46,000 01:15:50,000 [ fly buzzing ] [ fly buzzing ]
1389 01:15:53,500 01:15:55,500 [ gunshot ] [ gunshot ]
1390 01:15:56,500 01:15:59,500 Captioned by Grantman Brown Captioned by Grantman Brown