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1	00:01:43,854	00:01:46,857	On Sunday, August 13, 1961...	On Sunday, August 13, 1961...
2	00:01:47,024	00:01:49,610	the eyes of America were on the nation's capital...	the eyes of America were on the nation's capital...
3	00:01:49,735	00:01:53,322	where Roger Maris was hitting home runs number 44 and 45...	where Roger Maris was hitting home runs number 44 and 45...
4	00:01:53,405	00:01:54,824	against the Senators.	against the Senators.
5	00:01:54,907	00:01:56,992	On that same day, without any warning...	On that same day, without any warning...
6	00:01:57,076	00:01:59,328	the East German Communists sealed off the border...	the East German Communists sealed off the border...
7	00:01:59,411	00:02:02,206	between East and West Berlin.	between East and West Berlin.
8	00:02:02,248	00:02:03,415	I only mention this...	I only mention this...
9	00:02:03,499	00:02:05,668	to show the kind of people we're dealing with...	to show the kind of people we're dealing with...
10	00:02:05,751	00:02:07,920	Real shifty.	Real shifty.
11	00:02:08,003	00:02:10,506	Having been stationed in Berlin and having dealt with them...	Having been stationed in Berlin and having dealt with them...
12	00:02:10,589	00:02:12,091	I know what I'm talking about.	I know what I'm talking about.
13	00:02:12,925	00:02:14,760	Let's go back to last June.	Let's go back to last June.
14	00:02:14,844	00:02:17,638	Considering the abnormal situation of a divided city...	Considering the abnormal situation of a divided city...
15	00:02:17,721	00:02:20,057	life in Berlin was more or less normal.	life in Berlin was more or less normal.
16	00:02:20,099	00:02:22,351	Traffic flowed freely through the Brandenburg Gate...	Traffic flowed freely through the Brandenburg Gate...
17	00:02:22,434	00:02:23,686	and it wasn't really too much trouble...	and it wasn't really too much trouble...
18	00:02:23,769	00:02:25,437	to pass from one side of the Iron Curtain...	to pass from one side of the Iron Curtain...
19	00:02:25,479	00:02:26,689	to the other.	to the other.
20	00:02:26,730	00:02:29,567	Some of the East German police were rude and suspicious.	Some of the East German police were rude and suspicious.
21	00:02:29,650	00:02:31,944	Others were suspicious and rude.	Others were suspicious and rude.
22	00:02:32,027	00:02:34,530	The eastern sector, under Communist domination...	The eastern sector, under Communist domination...
23	00:02:34,572	00:02:36,073	was still in rubble...	was still in rubble...
24	00:02:36,115	00:02:38,492	but the people went about their daily business...	but the people went about their daily business...
25	00:02:38,576	00:02:39,743	parading.	parading.
26	00:03:32,171	00:03:33,756	These constant provocations...	These constant provocations...
27	00:03:33,839	00:03:36,091	failed to provoke the West Berliners.	failed to provoke the West Berliners.
28	00:03:36,175	00:03:37,760	They were too busy rebuilding.	They were too busy rebuilding.
29	00:03:38,928	00:03:41,597	The western sector, under Allied protection...	The western sector, under Allied protection...
30	00:03:41,639	00:03:43,557	was peaceful, prosperous...	was peaceful, prosperous...
31	00:03:43,599	00:03:46,310	and enjoyed all the blessings of democracy.	and enjoyed all the blessings of democracy.
32	00:03:50,648	00:03:51,982	Just by coincidence...	Just by coincidence...
33	00:03:52,066	00:03:54,276	this happens to be the company I work for.	this happens to be the company I work for.
34	00:04:11,585	00:04:12,920	Danke schön.	Danke schön.
35	00:04:20,928	00:04:22,137	Danke schön, Fritz.	Danke schön, Fritz.
36	00:04:29,645	00:04:31,230	Danke schön.	Danke schön.
37	00:04:43,367	00:04:45,661	Danke schön already.	Danke schön already.
38	00:04:54,295	00:04:55,754	Sitzen machen.	Sitzen machen.
39	00:05:05,306	00:05:07,099	Schlemmer!	Schlemmer!
40	00:05:11,228	00:05:12,730	Good morning, Mr. MacNamara.	Good morning, Mr. MacNamara.
41	00:05:13,856	00:05:15,441	Schlemmer, how many times have I told you...	Schlemmer, how many times have I told you...
42	00:05:15,524	00:05:16,900	I don't want those people standing at attention...	I don't want those people standing at attention...
43	00:05:16,984	00:05:18,277	every time I come into the office.	every time I come into the office.
44	00:05:18,360	00:05:21,530	I know. I've given strict orders.	I know. I've given strict orders.
45	00:05:21,572	00:05:23,741	Can't they get it through their Prussian heads?	Can't they get it through their Prussian heads?
46	00:05:23,782	00:05:25,075	They're living in a democracy now.	They're living in a democracy now.
47	00:05:25,159	00:05:26,452	That is the trouble.	That is the trouble.
48	00:05:26,535	00:05:27,995	In the old days, if I ordered them to sit...	In the old days, if I ordered them to sit...
49	00:05:28,078	00:05:29,121	they would sit.	they would sit.
50	00:05:29,204	00:05:30,956	Now with a democracy, they do what they want.	Now with a democracy, they do what they want.
51	00:05:31,040	00:05:32,249	What they want is to stand.	What they want is to stand.
52	00:05:32,291	00:05:33,917	Next, any word yet from the mayor's office?	Next, any word yet from the mayor's office?
53	00:05:34,001	00:05:35,169	Yes, sir. Negative.	Yes, sir. Negative.
54	00:05:35,252	00:05:36,420	They absolutely will not permit us...	They absolutely will not permit us...
55	00:05:36,462	00:05:38,213	to install a Coke machine in the Reichstag.	to install a Coke machine in the Reichstag.
56	00:05:38,255	00:05:40,090	Sometimes I wonder who won the war.	Sometimes I wonder who won the war.
57	00:05:40,132	00:05:41,300	Next, did you pick up those airline tickets...	Next, did you pick up those airline tickets...
58	00:05:41,383	00:05:42,384	for my wife and children?	for my wife and children?
59	00:05:42,426	00:05:43,969	Yes, sir. Positive.	Yes, sir. Positive.
60	00:05:44,053	00:05:45,637	Three seats on a 6:00 plane to Venice.	Three seats on a 6:00 plane to Venice.
61	00:05:45,721	00:05:46,722	They change in Frankfurt.	They change in Frankfurt.
62	00:05:46,764	00:05:47,723	That reminds me.	That reminds me.
63	00:05:47,765	00:05:48,891	Call the Frankfurt plant and have them ship us...	Call the Frankfurt plant and have them ship us...
64	00:05:48,932	00:05:50,309	another 100,000 bottles.	another 100,000 bottles.
65	00:05:50,392	00:05:52,478	People keep smuggling Cokes into the eastern sector...	People keep smuggling Cokes into the eastern sector...
66	00:05:52,561	00:05:53,479	and not returning the empties.	and not returning the empties.
67	00:05:53,562	00:05:54,563	Yes, sir.	Yes, sir.
68	00:05:54,646	00:05:56,273	Next, I'm expecting the Russian Trade Commission at 10:30.	Next, I'm expecting the Russian Trade Commission at 10:30.
69	00:05:56,357	00:05:57,441	When they get here, show them right in.	When they get here, show them right in.
70	00:05:57,524	00:05:58,442	Yes, sir.	Yes, sir.
71	00:05:58,525	00:05:59,568	Next. Schlemmer, you're fired.	Next. Schlemmer, you're fired.
72	00:05:59,651	00:06:00,569	Sir?	Sir?
73	00:06:00,652	00:06:02,571	Unless you stop clicking your heels around here!	Unless you stop clicking your heels around here!
74	00:06:02,654	00:06:05,407	Yes, sir. Oh, I'm sorry. I keep forgetting myself.	Yes, sir. Oh, I'm sorry. I keep forgetting myself.
75	00:06:05,449	00:06:06,784	That old Gestapo training, huh?	That old Gestapo training, huh?
76	00:06:06,867	00:06:08,660	Please, Mr. MacNamara. You mustn't say that.	Please, Mr. MacNamara. You mustn't say that.
77	00:06:08,744	00:06:09,661	It is not true.	It is not true.
78	00:06:09,745	00:06:12,081	Just between us, Schlemmer, what did you do during the war?	Just between us, Schlemmer, what did you do during the war?
79	00:06:12,122	00:06:13,290	I was in der untergrund...	I was in der untergrund...
80	00:06:13,374	00:06:14,291	The underground.	The underground.
81	00:06:14,375	00:06:15,292	Resistance fighter?	Resistance fighter?
82	00:06:15,376	00:06:16,668	No. Motorman. In the underground.	No. Motorman. In the underground.
83	00:06:16,752	00:06:17,711	You know, the subway.	You know, the subway.
84	00:06:17,753	00:06:19,797	Of course, you were anti-Nazi, and you never liked Adolf.	Of course, you were anti-Nazi, and you never liked Adolf.
85	00:06:19,880	00:06:21,090	Adolf who?	Adolf who?
86	00:06:21,173	00:06:22,466	You see, down where I was...	You see, down where I was...
87	00:06:22,549	00:06:23,884	I didn't know what was going on out there...	I didn't know what was going on out there...
88	00:06:23,926	00:06:25,344	and nobody ever told me anything.	and nobody ever told me anything.
89	00:06:25,427	00:06:26,637	That'll be all, Schlemmer.	That'll be all, Schlemmer.
90	00:06:26,720	00:06:28,097	Herausmachen!	Herausmachen!
91	00:06:57,000	00:06:58,252	Guten Morgen, MacNamara.	Guten Morgen, MacNamara.
92	00:06:58,293	00:07:00,295	And a guten Morgen to you, Fräulein Ingeborg.	And a guten Morgen to you, Fräulein Ingeborg.
93	00:07:00,379	00:07:01,296	It is not "frow-line."	It is not "frow-line."
94	00:07:01,380	00:07:04,049	It is "froy-line" with an umlaut.	It is "froy-line" with an umlaut.
95	00:07:04,091	00:07:06,468	I'll say. Monthly report.	I'll say. Monthly report.
96	00:07:06,552	00:07:09,054	To Wendell P. Hazeltine, home office, Atlanta, Georgia.	To Wendell P. Hazeltine, home office, Atlanta, Georgia.
97	00:07:09,096	00:07:11,640	From C.R. MacNamara, Berlin branch.	From C.R. MacNamara, Berlin branch.
98	00:07:11,723	00:07:12,891	Production figures were made.	Production figures were made.
99	00:07:12,933	00:07:14,935	270,000 cases.	270,000 cases.
100	00:07:15,018	00:07:18,230	Consumption per capita now 5.2% above last year.	Consumption per capita now 5.2% above last year.
101	00:07:18,313	00:07:20,274	Outselling Rhine wine eight to one.	Outselling Rhine wine eight to one.
102	00:07:20,357	00:07:22,568	Rapidly creeping up on draft beer.	Rapidly creeping up on draft beer.
103	00:07:22,609	00:07:24,445	Next, publicity campaign...	Next, publicity campaign...
104	00:07:24,528	00:07:27,448	to reorient German businessmen's lunch succeeding.	to reorient German businessmen's lunch succeeding.
105	00:07:27,531	00:07:30,617	27% now having Coke with their knackwurst.	27% now having Coke with their knackwurst.
106	00:07:30,701	00:07:33,036	Now, here's a real hot flash.	Now, here's a real hot flash.
107	00:07:33,078	00:07:35,414	We may become the first American company...	We may become the first American company...
108	00:07:35,456	00:07:37,124	to crack the Iron Curtain.	to crack the Iron Curtain.
109	00:07:37,207	00:07:39,251	I have started preliminary negotiations...	I have started preliminary negotiations...
110	00:07:39,293	00:07:40,794	with a Russian representative.	with a Russian representative.
111	00:07:40,878	00:07:43,172	It looks most promising. More later.	It looks most promising. More later.
112	00:07:43,255	00:07:44,256	Next...	Next...
113	00:07:45,132	00:07:46,717	what did you do over the weekend?	what did you do over the weekend?
114	00:07:46,758	00:07:48,594	Nothing. I stayed home waiting for you.	Nothing. I stayed home waiting for you.
115	00:07:48,677	00:07:49,761	I tried to make it, believe me.	I tried to make it, believe me.
116	00:07:49,845	00:07:51,096	I just couldn't get away...	I just couldn't get away...
117	00:07:51,180	00:07:53,807	but there's good news tonight.	but there's good news tonight.
118	00:07:53,891	00:07:56,268	Yes? Mrs. MacNamara?	Yes? Mrs. MacNamara?
119	00:07:56,351	00:07:57,519	Put her on.	Put her on.
120	00:07:58,645	00:08:00,689	Yes, Phyllis. What's the matter?	Yes, Phyllis. What's the matter?
121	00:08:00,731	00:08:02,900	It's Tommy. We're having a little crisis here.	It's Tommy. We're having a little crisis here.
122	00:08:02,941	00:08:04,776	Why don't you talk to him?	Why don't you talk to him?
123	00:08:04,860	00:08:06,904	Tommy, your father's on the phone.	Tommy, your father's on the phone.
124	00:08:08,572	00:08:10,616	Hello, Dad. Nothing.	Hello, Dad. Nothing.
125	00:08:10,699	00:08:12,493	It's just that Mother's ganging up on me.	It's just that Mother's ganging up on me.
126	00:08:12,576	00:08:14,161	What do you mean by that?	What do you mean by that?
127	00:08:14,244	00:08:16,038	I think your mother's absolutely right.	I think your mother's absolutely right.
128	00:08:16,079	00:08:17,289	It's silly to pack them.	It's silly to pack them.
129	00:08:17,372	00:08:18,707	What are you going to do with roller skates in Venice?	What are you going to do with roller skates in Venice?
130	00:08:18,749	00:08:19,917	All the streets are underwater.	All the streets are underwater.
131	00:08:19,958	00:08:23,921	So what? I'm taking my aqualung and my snorkel.	So what? I'm taking my aqualung and my snorkel.
132	00:08:23,962	00:08:26,798	Here. Your husband wants to talk to you.	Here. Your husband wants to talk to you.
133	00:08:30,469	00:08:31,470	Yes, Mac?	Yes, Mac?
134	00:08:31,595	00:08:33,889	Look, Phyllis. Let him pack what he wants.	Look, Phyllis. Let him pack what he wants.
135	00:08:33,931	00:08:35,474	All right. So I'm spoiling him.	All right. So I'm spoiling him.
136	00:08:35,557	00:08:36,475	Big deal.	Big deal.
137	00:08:36,558	00:08:37,476	Don't worry.	Don't worry.
138	00:08:37,559	00:08:38,477	The car will be there at 5:00.	The car will be there at 5:00.
139	00:08:38,560	00:08:39,478	Then you'll pick me up at the office...	Then you'll pick me up at the office...
140	00:08:39,561	00:08:40,687	and I'll take you to the airport.	and I'll take you to the airport.
141	00:08:40,729	00:08:42,231	Yes, mein Führer.	Yes, mein Führer.
142	00:08:42,314	00:08:43,398	Bertha wants to know what you'd like...	Bertha wants to know what you'd like...
143	00:08:43,440	00:08:44,775	to have for dinner tonight.	to have for dinner tonight.
144	00:08:44,858	00:08:45,817	Oh, tell her not to bother.	Oh, tell her not to bother.
145	00:08:45,901	00:08:46,902	I've got a desk full of work.	I've got a desk full of work.
146	00:08:46,985	00:08:48,570	I'll just grab a quick bite somewhere.	I'll just grab a quick bite somewhere.
147	00:08:48,654	00:08:49,655	So long, dear.	So long, dear.
148	00:08:50,364	00:08:52,115	Like I said, good news.	Like I said, good news.
149	00:08:52,199	00:08:53,617	Your wife. She's making a trip?	Your wife. She's making a trip?
150	00:08:53,700	00:08:54,743	Is she ever.	Is she ever.
151	00:08:54,826	00:08:56,370	Going on vacation mit die Kinder.	Going on vacation mit die Kinder.
152	00:08:56,411	00:08:57,412	Ach so.	Ach so.
153	00:08:57,454	00:08:58,705	So tonight, we'll split a schnitzel...	So tonight, we'll split a schnitzel...
154	00:08:58,747	00:09:00,332	and start on the German lessons again.	and start on the German lessons again.
155	00:09:00,415	00:09:02,125	We should. You must be getting rusty.	We should. You must be getting rusty.
156	00:09:02,209	00:09:04,253	We'll just have to work at it twice as hard from now on.	We'll just have to work at it twice as hard from now on.
157	00:09:04,294	00:09:05,254	Das ist gut?	Das ist gut?
158	00:09:05,295	00:09:06,255	Sehr gut.	Sehr gut.
159	00:09:06,296	00:09:09,132	And the first thing we're gonna do is brush up on the umlaut.	And the first thing we're gonna do is brush up on the umlaut.
160	00:09:09,216	00:09:12,928	Das ist wunderbar.	Das ist wunderbar.
161	00:09:12,970	00:09:16,348	Like all the lilacs in Lower Bavaria.	Like all the lilacs in Lower Bavaria.
162	00:09:18,100	00:09:20,060	The Communist gentlemen are here.	The Communist gentlemen are here.
163	00:09:20,102	00:09:21,061	Send them in.	Send them in.
164	00:09:21,103	00:09:22,479	That'll be all, Fräulein Ingeborg.	That'll be all, Fräulein Ingeborg.
165	00:09:22,521	00:09:24,064	Put that on the teletype to Atlanta.	Put that on the teletype to Atlanta.
166	00:09:24,147	00:09:25,107	Jawohl.	Jawohl.
167	00:09:25,190	00:09:26,275	And take your gum.	And take your gum.
168	00:09:26,358	00:09:27,401	Jawohl.	Jawohl.
169	00:09:34,366	00:09:35,742	Nice to see you again, Comrade Mishkin.	Nice to see you again, Comrade Mishkin.
170	00:09:35,826	00:09:36,994	Hey, Mishkin.	Hey, Mishkin.
171	00:09:37,077	00:09:38,829	Ah, Mr. MacNamara...	Ah, Mr. MacNamara...
172	00:09:38,912	00:09:41,206	I would like to present Commissar Peripetchikoff...	I would like to present Commissar Peripetchikoff...
173	00:09:41,248	00:09:42,833	Chairman of our Trade Commission...	Chairman of our Trade Commission...
174	00:09:42,916	00:09:43,917	and Comrade Borodenko...	and Comrade Borodenko...
175	00:09:43,959	00:09:46,253	from the Soft Drinks Secretariat.	from the Soft Drinks Secretariat.
176	00:09:46,295	00:09:48,088	Sit down.	Sit down.
177	00:09:48,171	00:09:49,256	Sit down, boys.	Sit down, boys.
178	00:09:49,298	00:09:50,966	We have no objection.	We have no objection.
179	00:09:51,049	00:09:52,175	Cigarettes? Cigars?	Cigarettes? Cigars?
180	00:09:52,259	00:09:53,468	Here. Take one of these.	Here. Take one of these.
181	00:09:53,552	00:09:54,636	Thanks.	Thanks.
182	00:09:55,345	00:09:56,263	Made in Havana.	Made in Havana.
183	00:09:56,346	00:09:58,140	We have trade agreement with Cuba.	We have trade agreement with Cuba.
184	00:09:58,223	00:10:00,100	They send us cigars, we send them rockets.	They send us cigars, we send them rockets.
185	00:10:00,183	00:10:01,268	Good thinking.	Good thinking.
186	00:10:01,351	00:10:02,394	Now, I understand from Comrade Mishkin...	Now, I understand from Comrade Mishkin...
187	00:10:02,436	00:10:03,562	that you guys are very keen...	that you guys are very keen...
188	00:10:03,687	00:10:05,105	on getting Coca-Cola into Russia.	on getting Coca-Cola into Russia.
189	00:10:05,188	00:10:06,565	He is totally wrong.	He is totally wrong.
190	00:10:06,648	00:10:07,983	I did not say we are keen.	I did not say we are keen.
191	00:10:08,066	00:10:10,235	I said we are mildly interested.	I said we are mildly interested.
192	00:10:10,319	00:10:11,528	Nevertheless...	Nevertheless...
193	00:10:13,363	00:10:15,574	Comrade Mishkin suggested we start with 6 bottling plants...	Comrade Mishkin suggested we start with 6 bottling plants...
194	00:10:15,616	00:10:18,410	Moscow, Leningrad, Stalingrad, Kiev...	Moscow, Leningrad, Stalingrad, Kiev...
195	00:10:20,412	00:10:22,247	You know something? You guys got cheated.	You know something? You guys got cheated.
196	00:10:22,289	00:10:23,582	This is a pretty crummy cigar.	This is a pretty crummy cigar.
197	00:10:23,624	00:10:25,083	Do not worry.	Do not worry.
198	00:10:25,125	00:10:27,586	We send them pretty crummy rockets.	We send them pretty crummy rockets.
199	00:10:32,424	00:10:34,593	As I was saying, six plants...	As I was saying, six plants...
200	00:10:34,676	00:10:36,553	Moscow, Leningrad, Stalingrad...	Moscow, Leningrad, Stalingrad...
201	00:10:36,595	00:10:38,305	Kiev, Kharkov, and Minsk, right?	Kiev, Kharkov, and Minsk, right?
202	00:10:38,388	00:10:39,389	Totally wrong.	Totally wrong.
203	00:10:39,431	00:10:40,432	I never mentioned Minsk.	I never mentioned Minsk.
204	00:10:40,515	00:10:41,600	I said Pinsk.	I said Pinsk.
205	00:10:41,683	00:10:43,685	All right. Pinsk is in. Minsk is out.	All right. Pinsk is in. Minsk is out.
206	00:10:43,769	00:10:46,229	Next, our contract will contain the usual provisions.	Next, our contract will contain the usual provisions.
207	00:10:46,271	00:10:48,023	We supply the syrup, you do the bottling.	We supply the syrup, you do the bottling.
208	00:10:48,065	00:10:49,024	Certainly not.	Certainly not.
209	00:10:49,066	00:10:52,194	We make our own syrup. You supply the formula.	We make our own syrup. You supply the formula.
210	00:10:52,235	00:10:53,487	Forget it, gentlemen.	Forget it, gentlemen.
211	00:10:53,570	00:10:54,863	That formula stays in our vaults.	That formula stays in our vaults.
212	00:10:54,905	00:10:56,281	We give it to you, first thing we know...	We give it to you, first thing we know...
213	00:10:56,365	00:10:57,741	the Chinese Communists will have it.	the Chinese Communists will have it.
214	00:10:57,824	00:11:00,744	No formula, no deal.	No formula, no deal.
215	00:11:00,827	00:11:02,371	OK. No deal.	OK. No deal.
216	00:11:02,412	00:11:03,914	We do not need you.	We do not need you.
217	00:11:03,955	00:11:06,541	If we want Coca-Cola, we invent it ourselves.	If we want Coca-Cola, we invent it ourselves.
218	00:11:06,583	00:11:07,542	Oh, yeah?	Oh, yeah?
219	00:11:07,584	00:11:09,586	In 1956, you flew a bottle of Coke...	In 1956, you flew a bottle of Coke...
220	00:11:09,628	00:11:11,838	to a secret laboratory in Sverdlovsk.	to a secret laboratory in Sverdlovsk.
221	00:11:11,922	00:11:12,923	A dozen of your top chemists...	A dozen of your top chemists...
222	00:11:12,964	00:11:15,550	went nuts trying to analyze the ingredients, right?	went nuts trying to analyze the ingredients, right?
223	00:11:15,592	00:11:16,760	No comment.	No comment.
224	00:11:16,843	00:11:19,221	And in 1958, you planted two undercover agents...	And in 1958, you planted two undercover agents...
225	00:11:19,262	00:11:21,765	in our home office in Atlanta to steal the formula...	in our home office in Atlanta to steal the formula...
226	00:11:21,848	00:11:22,808	and what happened?	and what happened?
227	00:11:22,891	00:11:24,101	They both defected...	They both defected...
228	00:11:24,142	00:11:26,103	and now they're successful businessmen in Florida...	and now they're successful businessmen in Florida...
229	00:11:26,144	00:11:28,480	packaging instant borscht, right?	packaging instant borscht, right?
230	00:11:28,563	00:11:29,815	No comment.	No comment.
231	00:11:29,898	00:11:31,858	Last year, you put out a cockamamie imitation...	Last year, you put out a cockamamie imitation...
232	00:11:31,900	00:11:33,402	Kremlin Cola.	Kremlin Cola.
233	00:11:33,485	00:11:34,903	You tried it out in the satellite countries...	You tried it out in the satellite countries...
234	00:11:34,986	00:11:36,822	but even the Albanians wouldn't drink it.	but even the Albanians wouldn't drink it.
235	00:11:36,905	00:11:39,491	They used it for sheep-dip, right?	They used it for sheep-dip, right?
236	00:11:39,574	00:11:40,784	No comment.	No comment.
237	00:11:40,867	00:11:43,829	So either get down to business or get off the pot.	So either get down to business or get off the pot.
238	00:11:43,912	00:11:45,539	My dear American friend...	My dear American friend...
239	00:11:45,580	00:11:48,250	if we are to live together in peaceful coexistence...	if we are to live together in peaceful coexistence...
240	00:11:48,333	00:11:50,377	there must be a certain amount of give-and-take.	there must be a certain amount of give-and-take.
241	00:11:50,419	00:11:52,003	Oh, sure. We give, and you take.	Oh, sure. We give, and you take.
242	00:11:52,087	00:11:53,880	What is the matter? You do not trust us?	What is the matter? You do not trust us?
243	00:11:54,923	00:11:56,133	No comment.	No comment.
244	00:11:56,216	00:11:59,219	If you do not mind, we'll have a little conference.	If you do not mind, we'll have a little conference.
245	00:11:59,261	00:12:00,679	Help yourself.	Help yourself.
246	00:12:17,988	00:12:19,239	What is this?	What is this?
247	00:12:21,867	00:12:23,285	My employees gave it to me...	My employees gave it to me...
248	00:12:23,368	00:12:25,162	on the tenth anniversary of the Berlin Airlift.	on the tenth anniversary of the Berlin Airlift.
249	00:12:25,245	00:12:28,039	Comrades, are we going to stand here...	Comrades, are we going to stand here...
250	00:12:28,081	00:12:29,916	and listen to this cheap propaganda?	and listen to this cheap propaganda?
251	00:12:29,958	00:12:31,710	Relax, Boris.	Relax, Boris.
252	00:12:31,835	00:12:34,254	While they're putting Uncle Sam in cuckoo clocks...	While they're putting Uncle Sam in cuckoo clocks...
253	00:12:34,296	00:12:37,257	we will put Soviet cosmonaut on moon.	we will put Soviet cosmonaut on moon.
254	00:12:37,299	00:12:39,885	OK. So you guys may be the first to shoot a man to the moon...	OK. So you guys may be the first to shoot a man to the moon...
255	00:12:39,926	00:12:41,261	but if he wants a Coke on the way...	but if he wants a Coke on the way...
256	00:12:41,344	00:12:43,096	you'll have to come to us.	you'll have to come to us.
257	00:12:51,021	00:12:53,231	All right. We agree in principle.	All right. We agree in principle.
258	00:12:53,315	00:12:54,566	You supply the syrup.	You supply the syrup.
259	00:12:54,608	00:12:57,068	Next, the deal will be set up on a royalty basis.	Next, the deal will be set up on a royalty basis.
260	00:12:57,152	00:12:58,487	Royalty?	Royalty?
261	00:12:58,570	00:13:00,238	In Russia, we do not have royalty...	In Russia, we do not have royalty...
262	00:13:00,322	00:13:02,115	not since we liquidate the Czar.	not since we liquidate the Czar.
263	00:13:02,199	00:13:04,576	Nevertheless, you'll pay us a percentage of the gross.	Nevertheless, you'll pay us a percentage of the gross.
264	00:13:04,659	00:13:05,744	- Money? - Dollars.	- Money? - Dollars.
265	00:13:05,827	00:13:08,455	Instead of dollars, you would accept three-week tour...	Instead of dollars, you would accept three-week tour...
266	00:13:08,538	00:13:09,915	of Bolshoi Ballet.	of Bolshoi Ballet.
267	00:13:09,998	00:13:11,958	Please. No culture, just cash.	Please. No culture, just cash.
268	00:13:12,042	00:13:14,669	The ugly American.	The ugly American.
269	00:13:16,004	00:13:17,547	Next, once the plants are up...	Next, once the plants are up...
270	00:13:17,589	00:13:18,757	we reserve the right of inspection.	we reserve the right of inspection.
271	00:13:18,840	00:13:20,926	Of course, and we reserve the right to veto.	Of course, and we reserve the right to veto.
272	00:13:20,967	00:13:21,927	Our inspections will be entitled to...	Our inspections will be entitled to...
273	00:13:22,010	00:13:24,763	- We veto it. - I thought so.	- We veto it. - I thought so.
274	00:13:24,846	00:13:26,223	Forget details.	Forget details.
275	00:13:26,264	00:13:27,557	You will draw up temporary agreement...	You will draw up temporary agreement...
276	00:13:27,599	00:13:28,600	we will submit to Moscow.	we will submit to Moscow.
277	00:13:28,683	00:13:30,602	And I'll have to consult with Atlanta, Georgia.	And I'll have to consult with Atlanta, Georgia.
278	00:13:30,685	00:13:31,937	When will papers be ready?	When will papers be ready?
279	00:13:31,978	00:13:33,563	I'll put my secretary right to work on it.	I'll put my secretary right to work on it.
280	00:13:33,605	00:13:35,899	Your secretary? She's that blond lady?	Your secretary? She's that blond lady?
281	00:13:35,941	00:13:37,400	That's the one.	That's the one.
282	00:13:40,195	00:13:41,738	You will send papers to East Berlin...	You will send papers to East Berlin...
283	00:13:41,780	00:13:43,657	with blond lady in triplicate.	with blond lady in triplicate.
284	00:13:43,740	00:13:44,783	You want the papers in triplicate...	You want the papers in triplicate...
285	00:13:44,866	00:13:46,117	or the blond in triplicate?	or the blond in triplicate?
286	00:13:46,201	00:13:47,577	See what you can do.	See what you can do.
287	00:13:47,661	00:13:49,746	We are staying at the Grand Hotel Potemkin.	We are staying at the Grand Hotel Potemkin.
288	00:13:49,788	00:13:51,748	OK. Now, how about a little vodka and Coke?	OK. Now, how about a little vodka and Coke?
289	00:13:51,790	00:13:52,874	No, thank you.	No, thank you.
290	00:13:52,916	00:13:55,752	We have emergency meeting with Swiss trade delegation.	We have emergency meeting with Swiss trade delegation.
291	00:13:55,794	00:13:58,588	They sent us twenty carloads of cheese.	They sent us twenty carloads of cheese.
292	00:13:58,630	00:14:00,590	Totally unacceptable. Full of holes.	Totally unacceptable. Full of holes.
293	00:14:00,674	00:14:01,675	Good-bye.	Good-bye.
294	00:14:02,801	00:14:04,761	See you around the campus.	See you around the campus.
295	00:14:21,069	00:14:23,029	Ring a ding ding.	Ring a ding ding.
296	00:14:32,956	00:14:34,040	What is it, Schlemmer?	What is it, Schlemmer?
297	00:14:34,082	00:14:35,500	It is the overseas operator.	It is the overseas operator.
298	00:14:35,584	00:14:38,044	You are to stand by for a call from Atlanta, Georgia.	You are to stand by for a call from Atlanta, Georgia.
299	00:14:38,086	00:14:40,380	Atlanta? They must have gotten my teletype.	Atlanta? They must have gotten my teletype.
300	00:14:40,422	00:14:42,257	I bet they're all worked up about the Russian deal.	I bet they're all worked up about the Russian deal.
301	00:14:42,340	00:14:43,758	- It went good? - Good?	- It went good? - Good?
302	00:14:43,800	00:14:44,843	Look at this, Schlemmer.	Look at this, Schlemmer.
303	00:14:44,926	00:14:46,553	All virgin territory...	All virgin territory...
304	00:14:46,595	00:14:48,847	300 million thirsty comrades...	300 million thirsty comrades...
305	00:14:48,930	00:14:50,265	Volga boatmen and Cossacks...	Volga boatmen and Cossacks...
306	00:14:50,348	00:14:52,100	Ukrainians and Outer Mongolians...	Ukrainians and Outer Mongolians...
307	00:14:52,142	00:14:54,560	panting for the pause that refreshes.	panting for the pause that refreshes.
308	00:14:54,561	00:14:57,022	Do you realize what it means if I could put this across?	Do you realize what it means if I could put this across?
309	00:14:57,063	00:14:58,356	Your stock, it will go up.	Your stock, it will go up.
310	00:14:58,398	00:15:00,400	I'll go up to the number-one job...	I'll go up to the number-one job...
311	00:15:00,483	00:15:01,818	Head of all European operations...	Head of all European operations...
312	00:15:01,902	00:15:03,028	headquarters in London.	headquarters in London.
313	00:15:03,069	00:15:04,905	May I be the first to congratulate you?	May I be the first to congratulate you?
314	00:15:04,946	00:15:06,281	I should have had that job five years ago.	I should have had that job five years ago.
315	00:15:06,364	00:15:07,324	I was all set for it...	I was all set for it...
316	00:15:07,407	00:15:08,867	even bought myself an umbrella...	even bought myself an umbrella...
317	00:15:08,909	00:15:11,494	but I got loused up by Benny Goodman.	but I got loused up by Benny Goodman.
318	00:15:11,578	00:15:12,579	Benny Goodman?	Benny Goodman?
319	00:15:12,621	00:15:15,332	I was in charge of the whole Middle East...	I was in charge of the whole Middle East...
320	00:15:15,415	00:15:19,044	Nine countries, fifteen bottling plants, all facing Mecca.	Nine countries, fifteen bottling plants, all facing Mecca.
321	00:15:19,085	00:15:20,503	Well, Goodman and his band were coming through...	Well, Goodman and his band were coming through...
322	00:15:20,587	00:15:23,131	on a goodwill tour for the State Department.	on a goodwill tour for the State Department.
323	00:15:23,214	00:15:25,592	30,000 people showed up at the concert...	30,000 people showed up at the concert...
324	00:15:25,675	00:15:27,385	but Benny didn't because his plane was delayed...	but Benny didn't because his plane was delayed...
325	00:15:27,427	00:15:29,888	by a sandstorm, so the mob rioted...	by a sandstorm, so the mob rioted...
326	00:15:29,971	00:15:31,556	and marched on the American embassy...	and marched on the American embassy...
327	00:15:31,598	00:15:32,974	so the police turned them back...	so the police turned them back...
328	00:15:33,058	00:15:35,143	so they burned down the Coca-Cola plant.	so they burned down the Coca-Cola plant.
329	00:15:35,769	00:15:36,686	You know it.	You know it.
330	00:15:36,728	00:15:38,146	There was a big rhubarb at the home office...	There was a big rhubarb at the home office...
331	00:15:38,229	00:15:40,065	and suddenly, I was in the doghouse...	and suddenly, I was in the doghouse...
332	00:15:40,106	00:15:41,775	exiled to South America...	exiled to South America...
333	00:15:41,858	00:15:43,818	schlepping that syrup over the Andes...	schlepping that syrup over the Andes...
334	00:15:43,902	00:15:45,236	on llamas yet...	on llamas yet...
335	00:15:45,320	00:15:46,613	while a bunch of crew-cut kids...	while a bunch of crew-cut kids...
336	00:15:46,696	00:15:47,989	were being promoted over my head!	were being promoted over my head!
337	00:15:48,073	00:15:49,157	But you're in Berlin now.	But you're in Berlin now.
338	00:15:49,240	00:15:50,450	This is not the doghouse.	This is not the doghouse.
339	00:15:50,533	00:15:52,243	Yeah. I used to have nine countries.	Yeah. I used to have nine countries.
340	00:15:52,285	00:15:55,372	Now I've got half a city, and that may blow up any day...	Now I've got half a city, and that may blow up any day...
341	00:15:55,413	00:15:58,917	but MacNamara rides again!	but MacNamara rides again!
342	00:15:59,000	00:16:00,877	I'll be the white-haired boy now.	I'll be the white-haired boy now.
343	00:16:00,919	00:16:02,379	I'm going all the way!	I'm going all the way!
344	00:16:02,420	00:16:05,006	Yes? It's Atlanta.	Yes? It's Atlanta.
345	00:16:05,090	00:16:07,175	Hello? Hello? Mr. Hazeltine?	Hello? Hello? Mr. Hazeltine?
346	00:16:07,258	00:16:08,593	Yes, I can hear you.	Yes, I can hear you.
347	00:16:08,635	00:16:10,512	I'm fine, Mr. Hazeltine. How are you?	I'm fine, Mr. Hazeltine. How are you?
348	00:16:10,595	00:16:12,263	Well, if you must know, I'm miserable.	Well, if you must know, I'm miserable.
349	00:16:12,305	00:16:14,015	Those damn magnolias are in bloom again...	Those damn magnolias are in bloom again...
350	00:16:14,099	00:16:15,934	and so is my hay fever.	and so is my hay fever.
351	00:16:16,017	00:16:17,644	MacNamara, there's something important...	MacNamara, there's something important...
352	00:16:17,727	00:16:19,312	I'd like to discuss with you.	I'd like to discuss with you.
353	00:16:19,354	00:16:21,189	I thought you would, Mr. Hazeltine.	I thought you would, Mr. Hazeltine.
354	00:16:21,231	00:16:22,482	You got my teletype?	You got my teletype?
355	00:16:22,565	00:16:23,733	It's right here in front of me.	It's right here in front of me.
356	00:16:23,775	00:16:25,402	Those figures from May are not bad...	Those figures from May are not bad...
357	00:16:25,485	00:16:26,528	not bad at all.	not bad at all.
358	00:16:26,569	00:16:27,529	Thank you, sir.	Thank you, sir.
359	00:16:27,570	00:16:29,072	And how about the Russian deal?	And how about the Russian deal?
360	00:16:29,155	00:16:30,949	Napoleon blew it, Hitler blew it...	Napoleon blew it, Hitler blew it...
361	00:16:31,032	00:16:32,909	but Coca-Cola's gonna pull it off.	but Coca-Cola's gonna pull it off.
362	00:16:32,993	00:16:34,911	Forget it, MacNamara. Forget it.	Forget it, MacNamara. Forget it.
363	00:16:34,953	00:16:36,830	We are not interested in doing business...	We are not interested in doing business...
364	00:16:36,913	00:16:37,998	behind the Iron Curtain.	behind the Iron Curtain.
365	00:16:38,081	00:16:40,125	We're not interested in the Russian market?	We're not interested in the Russian market?
366	00:16:40,208	00:16:42,669	I wouldn't touch the Russians with a ten-foot pole...	I wouldn't touch the Russians with a ten-foot pole...
367	00:16:42,752	00:16:45,213	and I don't want anything to do with the Poles, either.	and I don't want anything to do with the Poles, either.
368	00:16:45,255	00:16:46,756	But this could be the biggest thing for the company...	But this could be the biggest thing for the company...
369	00:16:46,840	00:16:48,925	since we introduced the six-pack!	since we introduced the six-pack!
370	00:16:50,301	00:16:52,429	Well, if it's against front-office policy...	Well, if it's against front-office policy...
371	00:16:52,512	00:16:53,513	You're damn right...	You're damn right...
372	00:16:53,596	00:16:55,056	but that's not what I called you about.	but that's not what I called you about.
373	00:16:55,098	00:16:56,099	Look, MacNamara.	Look, MacNamara.
374	00:16:56,182	00:16:58,351	I'd like you to do me a big personal favor.	I'd like you to do me a big personal favor.
375	00:16:58,435	00:16:59,769	Yes, Mr. Hazeltine?	Yes, Mr. Hazeltine?
376	00:16:59,811	00:17:00,979	You want me to ship Mrs. Hazeltine...	You want me to ship Mrs. Hazeltine...
377	00:17:01,062	00:17:02,522	another set of Misen china?	another set of Misen china?
378	00:17:02,564	00:17:04,482	No! It's about our daughter Scarlett.	No! It's about our daughter Scarlett.
379	00:17:04,566	00:17:06,735	She's seventeen now, sweet girl...	She's seventeen now, sweet girl...
380	00:17:06,776	00:17:09,070	fell in love with some damn rock'n'roll singer.	fell in love with some damn rock'n'roll singer.
381	00:17:09,112	00:17:11,072	No. That was the one before.	No. That was the one before.
382	00:17:11,156	00:17:13,950	This is some pimple-faced basketball player.	This is some pimple-faced basketball player.
383	00:17:14,034	00:17:16,202	Anyway, we sent her off on a little trip to Europe.	Anyway, we sent her off on a little trip to Europe.
384	00:17:17,078	00:17:18,329	Where was I?	Where was I?
385	00:17:18,413	00:17:20,790	Daughter Scarlett, pimple-faced basketball player...	Daughter Scarlett, pimple-faced basketball player...
386	00:17:20,874	00:17:22,000	sent her to Europe...	sent her to Europe...
387	00:17:22,083	00:17:23,001	Oh, yes!	Oh, yes!
388	00:17:23,084	00:17:24,210	We had her spend a couple of weeks...	We had her spend a couple of weeks...
389	00:17:24,252	00:17:25,587	with our representative in Rome...	with our representative in Rome...
390	00:17:25,628	00:17:27,422	and a couple of weeks with our man in Paris...	and a couple of weeks with our man in Paris...
391	00:17:27,464	00:17:29,591	and she's arriving in Berlin this afternoon...	and she's arriving in Berlin this afternoon...
392	00:17:29,674	00:17:32,343	so I'd appreciate it if you and Mrs. MacNamara...	so I'd appreciate it if you and Mrs. MacNamara...
393	00:17:32,427	00:17:33,762	Oh, we'd be delighted to have her stay with us.	Oh, we'd be delighted to have her stay with us.
394	00:17:33,845	00:17:36,097	It's just that my family has made some plans...	It's just that my family has made some plans...
395	00:17:36,181	00:17:38,767	and I have a few plans of my own.	and I have a few plans of my own.
396	00:17:38,808	00:17:40,894	Well, if it's any sort of imposition, never mind.	Well, if it's any sort of imposition, never mind.
397	00:17:40,935	00:17:42,520	I'm sorry I called you.	I'm sorry I called you.
398	00:17:42,562	00:17:44,898	Well, actually, I wasn't thinking of myself.	Well, actually, I wasn't thinking of myself.
399	00:17:44,939	00:17:46,691	It's your daughter I'm concerned about.	It's your daughter I'm concerned about.
400	00:17:46,733	00:17:48,943	With the political situation in Berlin the way it is...	With the political situation in Berlin the way it is...
401	00:17:49,027	00:17:50,904	anything can happen anytime.	anything can happen anytime.
402	00:17:50,987	00:17:51,905	Exactly.	Exactly.
403	00:17:51,988	00:17:54,032	That's why I want you to take especially good care of her.	That's why I want you to take especially good care of her.
404	00:17:54,074	00:17:55,533	She's just a child, really...	She's just a child, really...
405	00:17:55,575	00:17:57,368	and I don't like her to stay in a hotel alone...	and I don't like her to stay in a hotel alone...
406	00:17:57,410	00:17:58,578	at a time like this.	at a time like this.
407	00:17:58,620	00:18:00,080	She's flying Pan Am.	She's flying Pan Am.
408	00:18:00,121	00:18:02,749	The plane is due in Berlin at 4:30...	The plane is due in Berlin at 4:30...
409	00:18:02,791	00:18:05,293	unless those damn Commies shoot it down.	unless those damn Commies shoot it down.
410	00:18:27,649	00:18:29,567	Here. You give her the flowers.	Here. You give her the flowers.
411	00:18:29,651	00:18:30,735	Oh, cut it out, Phyllis!	Oh, cut it out, Phyllis!
412	00:18:30,819	00:18:31,903	What was I going to do?	What was I going to do?
413	00:18:31,986	00:18:33,530	The boss asked me to look after his only daughter.	The boss asked me to look after his only daughter.
414	00:18:33,571	00:18:34,781	I can't disappoint him.	I can't disappoint him.
415	00:18:34,864	00:18:36,116	Well, what about your only children...	Well, what about your only children...
416	00:18:36,199	00:18:37,242	and your only wife?	and your only wife?
417	00:18:37,325	00:18:38,827	We were all packed and ready to go.	We were all packed and ready to go.
418	00:18:38,910	00:18:39,911	Don't you think we were disappointed?	Don't you think we were disappointed?
419	00:18:39,994	00:18:41,913	Believe me, Phyllis, everybody's disappointed.	Believe me, Phyllis, everybody's disappointed.
420	00:18:41,996	00:18:43,289	We'll just have to put things off a couple of weeks...	We'll just have to put things off a couple of weeks...
421	00:18:43,373	00:18:44,749	The roller skates and the snorkel and the umlaut.	The roller skates and the snorkel and the umlaut.
422	00:18:44,791	00:18:46,084	The what?	The what?
423	00:18:46,167	00:18:47,418	Right now, the important thing is to make sure...	Right now, the important thing is to make sure...
424	00:18:47,460	00:18:49,420	that the girl has a good time so when she goes home...	that the girl has a good time so when she goes home...
425	00:18:49,504	00:18:51,714	all she'll talk about is our man in Berlin.	all she'll talk about is our man in Berlin.
426	00:18:51,756	00:18:53,216	It's such a nuisance.	It's such a nuisance.
427	00:18:53,258	00:18:55,051	Tommy will have to move into Cindy's room.	Tommy will have to move into Cindy's room.
428	00:18:55,093	00:18:56,845	Bertha will have to learn how to cook sauerbraten...	Bertha will have to learn how to cook sauerbraten...
429	00:18:56,928	00:18:58,054	southern style.	southern style.
430	00:18:58,096	00:18:59,347	Come on, Phyllis. Make an effort.	Come on, Phyllis. Make an effort.
431	00:18:59,430	00:19:01,099	Yes, mein Führer.	Yes, mein Führer.
432	00:19:16,322	00:19:17,490	Pardon me, is this the plane from Paris?	Pardon me, is this the plane from Paris?
433	00:19:17,574	00:19:18,700	Oui, monsieur.	Oui, monsieur.
434	00:19:18,741	00:19:19,993	Isn't there a Miss Hazeltine among the passengers?	Isn't there a Miss Hazeltine among the passengers?
435	00:19:20,076	00:19:22,078	There was a Miss Hazeltine among the passengers...	There was a Miss Hazeltine among the passengers...
436	00:19:22,120	00:19:23,079	but we have lost her.	but we have lost her.
437	00:19:23,121	00:19:24,080	You lost her?	You lost her?
438	00:19:24,122	00:19:25,456	She has joined the crew.	She has joined the crew.
439	00:19:33,214	00:19:36,759	Scarlett Hazeltine if I ever saw one.	Scarlett Hazeltine if I ever saw one.
440	00:19:38,595	00:19:39,929	Miss Hazeltine, I'm MacNamara.	Miss Hazeltine, I'm MacNamara.
441	00:19:39,971	00:19:41,514	This is Mrs. MacNamara. Welcome to Berlin.	This is Mrs. MacNamara. Welcome to Berlin.
442	00:19:41,598	00:19:42,807	Hi there!	Hi there!
443	00:19:42,891	00:19:43,933	How was your flight?	How was your flight?
444	00:19:43,975	00:19:45,226	Just marvy.	Just marvy.
445	00:19:45,268	00:19:47,770	The boys let me buzz Dusseldorf.	The boys let me buzz Dusseldorf.
446	00:19:48,563	00:19:49,856	May I have your hat?	May I have your hat?
447	00:19:49,898	00:19:51,399	OK, fans. Drop them in.	OK, fans. Drop them in.
448	00:19:52,942	00:19:54,152	Pick one, will you, please?	Pick one, will you, please?
449	00:19:54,235	00:19:55,153	I'm game.	I'm game.
450	00:19:55,236	00:19:56,154	What does it say?	What does it say?
451	00:19:56,237	00:19:57,155	It says Pierre.	It says Pierre.
452	00:19:57,238	00:19:58,156	That's me!	That's me!
453	00:19:58,239	00:19:59,157	Where do I come to pick you up?	Where do I come to pick you up?
454	00:19:59,240	00:20:00,283	- What's our address? - Why?	- What's our address? - Why?
455	00:20:00,366	00:20:02,869	Well, we just had this lottery, and Pierre won me.	Well, we just had this lottery, and Pierre won me.
456	00:20:02,911	00:20:03,870	Lucky Pierre.	Lucky Pierre.
457	00:20:03,912	00:20:05,288	He's the navigator.	He's the navigator.
458	00:20:05,371	00:20:07,081	That so? Well, you better change your course, Lucky.	That so? Well, you better change your course, Lucky.
459	00:20:07,123	00:20:09,417	You're way off the beam. This way, Miss Hazeltine.	You're way off the beam. This way, Miss Hazeltine.
460	00:20:09,459	00:20:10,877	Now just a darn minute.	Now just a darn minute.
461	00:20:10,919	00:20:12,003	So long, fans!	So long, fans!
462	00:20:12,086	00:20:13,338	But that's not fair!	But that's not fair!
463	00:20:13,421	00:20:16,174	Madame, I appeal to you as a woman.	Madame, I appeal to you as a woman.
464	00:20:16,257	00:20:18,134	As a matter of fact, you do.	As a matter of fact, you do.
465	00:20:18,176	00:20:19,344	Au revoir.	Au revoir.
466	00:20:20,136	00:20:21,304	So you're gonna be like that?	So you're gonna be like that?
467	00:20:21,387	00:20:22,305	Like what?	Like what?
468	00:20:22,388	00:20:25,516	A company man like those old poops in Rome and Paris...	A company man like those old poops in Rome and Paris...
469	00:20:25,600	00:20:28,060	breathing down my neck every minute, cramping my style.	breathing down my neck every minute, cramping my style.
470	00:20:28,061	00:20:29,020	Look, Miss Hazeltine.	Look, Miss Hazeltine.
471	00:20:29,062	00:20:30,438	You're underage, and I'm under orders!	You're underage, and I'm under orders!
472	00:20:30,521	00:20:32,023	Europe... what a drag!	Europe... what a drag!
473	00:20:32,065	00:20:34,525	I've done the Colosseum bit and the Mona Lisa bit...	I've done the Colosseum bit and the Mona Lisa bit...
474	00:20:34,567	00:20:37,028	but they never take me to any of those marvy places...	but they never take me to any of those marvy places...
475	00:20:37,070	00:20:39,864	like the Lido and the Crazy Horse and Le Sexy.	like the Lido and the Crazy Horse and Le Sexy.
476	00:20:39,906	00:20:42,075	I promise you, you'll have a wonderful time in Berlin.	I promise you, you'll have a wonderful time in Berlin.
477	00:20:42,158	00:20:43,117	That's why I came.	That's why I came.
478	00:20:43,201	00:20:44,619	I hear this is a real swinging town.	I hear this is a real swinging town.
479	00:20:44,702	00:20:46,079	Where did you hear that?	Where did you hear that?
480	00:20:46,162	00:20:47,580	Don't you ever read the headlines?	Don't you ever read the headlines?
481	00:20:47,622	00:20:49,249	Everybody says Berlin's the hottest spot...	Everybody says Berlin's the hottest spot...
482	00:20:49,332	00:20:50,792	in the world right now.	in the world right now.
483	00:20:50,875	00:20:52,209	Would you care to make a short statement...	Would you care to make a short statement...
484	00:20:52,210	00:20:53,503	for the American Forces Network?	for the American Forces Network?
485	00:20:53,586	00:20:54,587	Phyllis, please!	Phyllis, please!
486	00:20:54,629	00:20:56,381	We're a little late, folks, so good night.	We're a little late, folks, so good night.
487	00:20:56,422	00:20:57,423	This your ticket?	This your ticket?
488	00:20:57,465	00:20:58,841	Fritz, with the luggage machen.	Fritz, with the luggage machen.
489	00:20:58,925	00:21:00,593	You'd better send a cable to Tara...	You'd better send a cable to Tara...
490	00:21:00,677	00:21:02,011	and tell them Scarlett's checked in.	and tell them Scarlett's checked in.
491	00:21:02,095	00:21:03,763	Don't bother. Let them worry.	Don't bother. Let them worry.
492	00:21:03,846	00:21:05,598	I didn't volunteer for this trip.	I didn't volunteer for this trip.
493	00:21:05,682	00:21:08,685	They deported me just to bust it up between me and Choo Choo.	They deported me just to bust it up between me and Choo Choo.
494	00:21:08,768	00:21:09,769	Who's Choo Choo?	Who's Choo Choo?
495	00:21:09,811	00:21:10,812	Choo Choo Babcock.	Choo Choo Babcock.
496	00:21:10,895	00:21:12,355	I met him in a telephone booth.	I met him in a telephone booth.
497	00:21:12,397	00:21:15,692	43 of us piled inside... You know, to break the record...	43 of us piled inside... You know, to break the record...
498	00:21:15,733	00:21:17,235	And Choo Choo and I were on the bottom...	And Choo Choo and I were on the bottom...
499	00:21:17,318	00:21:20,029	and by the time we got out, we were engaged.	and by the time we got out, we were engaged.
500	00:21:20,071	00:21:22,031	That's a record, all right.	That's a record, all right.
501	00:21:22,073	00:21:24,242	But Daddy didn't approve because Choo Choo's folks...	But Daddy didn't approve because Choo Choo's folks...
502	00:21:24,284	00:21:26,202	are from the wrong side of the tracks...	are from the wrong side of the tracks...
503	00:21:26,244	00:21:29,372	and let's face it, my daddy's an S-N-O-B.	and let's face it, my daddy's an S-N-O-B.
504	00:21:29,414	00:21:30,415	A what?	A what?
505	00:21:30,456	00:21:31,749	- A snob. - Oh.	- A snob. - Oh.
506	00:21:31,833	00:21:34,002	Seventeen. Isn't that a little young to be engaged?	Seventeen. Isn't that a little young to be engaged?
507	00:21:34,085	00:21:35,920	Oh, I've been engaged four times.	Oh, I've been engaged four times.
508	00:21:36,004	00:21:38,756	All the women in our family are sort of hot-blooded.	All the women in our family are sort of hot-blooded.
509	00:21:39,882	00:21:42,093	What have we got here?	What have we got here?
510	00:21:42,176	00:21:45,221	Whatever it is, it's all ours for the next two weeks.	Whatever it is, it's all ours for the next two weeks.
511	00:21:45,263	00:21:46,806	Isn't that marvy?	Isn't that marvy?
512	00:22:10,163	00:22:11,164	Schlemmer!	Schlemmer!
513	00:22:15,918	00:22:18,004	I'm sorry. I will keep them here after hours practicing.	I'm sorry. I will keep them here after hours practicing.
514	00:22:18,087	00:22:19,088	Never mind that.	Never mind that.
515	00:22:19,130	00:22:20,423	My chauffeur didn't show up this morning.	My chauffeur didn't show up this morning.
516	00:22:20,465	00:22:22,300	Fritz? I will find out what happened to him.	Fritz? I will find out what happened to him.
517	00:22:22,383	00:22:23,384	I don't care what happened to him.	I don't care what happened to him.
518	00:22:23,426	00:22:24,635	Find out what happened to my car.	Find out what happened to my car.
519	00:22:24,719	00:22:25,803	Jawohl!	Jawohl!
520	00:22:25,887	00:22:26,804	I'm sorry.	I'm sorry.
521	00:22:26,888	00:22:28,222	While they are practicing not standing...	While they are practicing not standing...
522	00:22:28,264	00:22:30,391	I will practice not clicking my heels.	I will practice not clicking my heels.
523	00:22:34,562	00:22:36,397	Guten Morgen, Fräulein Ingeborg.	Guten Morgen, Fräulein Ingeborg.
524	00:22:36,439	00:22:37,398	Guten Morgen.	Guten Morgen.
525	00:22:37,440	00:22:39,734	Like freshly baked pumpernickel.	Like freshly baked pumpernickel.
526	00:22:39,776	00:22:40,735	Here's your mail.	Here's your mail.
527	00:22:40,818	00:22:41,778	Here's your "Wall Street Journal"...	Here's your "Wall Street Journal"...
528	00:22:41,861	00:22:43,780	and here is my resignation.	and here is my resignation.
529	00:22:43,863	00:22:45,406	Resignation? What are you talking about?	Resignation? What are you talking about?
530	00:22:45,490	00:22:46,949	Now you do not work me overtime anymore.	Now you do not work me overtime anymore.
531	00:22:47,033	00:22:48,951	You do not take advantage of me on weekends.	You do not take advantage of me on weekends.
532	00:22:49,035	00:22:51,245	You have lost all interest in the umlaut...	You have lost all interest in the umlaut...
533	00:22:51,329	00:22:54,040	so, obviously, my services are no longer required here.	so, obviously, my services are no longer required here.
534	00:22:54,082	00:22:56,084	You know my problem. We have this houseguest.	You know my problem. We have this houseguest.
535	00:22:56,125	00:22:57,877	You said she would be in Berlin two weeks.	You said she would be in Berlin two weeks.
536	00:22:57,919	00:22:59,629	Can I help it if she caught the German measles?	Can I help it if she caught the German measles?
537	00:22:59,712	00:23:01,089	She's been here now two months.	She's been here now two months.
538	00:23:01,172	00:23:02,090	She likes it here.	She likes it here.
539	00:23:02,173	00:23:03,966	It's a damn nuisance, but what am I gonna do, throw her out?	It's a damn nuisance, but what am I gonna do, throw her out?
540	00:23:04,050	00:23:05,093	Doesn't she have to go home?	Doesn't she have to go home?
541	00:23:05,176	00:23:06,803	It's August. Won't schools soon open?	It's August. Won't schools soon open?
542	00:23:06,886	00:23:08,596	In Georgia? You never know.	In Georgia? You never know.
543	00:23:08,679	00:23:09,764	Come on now.	Come on now.
544	00:23:09,806	00:23:10,932	What is all this nonsense about quitting?	What is all this nonsense about quitting?
545	00:23:10,973	00:23:12,141	I have had offers for many jobs.	I have had offers for many jobs.
546	00:23:12,225	00:23:13,768	After all, I'm bilingual.	After all, I'm bilingual.
547	00:23:13,851	00:23:14,769	Don't I know it.	Don't I know it.
548	00:23:14,852	00:23:16,354	Remember that Russian Trade Commission?	Remember that Russian Trade Commission?
549	00:23:16,437	00:23:17,855	They keep calling me all the time.	They keep calling me all the time.
550	00:23:17,897	00:23:19,065	They want me very badly.	They want me very badly.
551	00:23:19,107	00:23:20,942	I'll bet, those Siberian wolves.	I'll bet, those Siberian wolves.
552	00:23:21,025	00:23:23,152	So you better find yourself another girl.	So you better find yourself another girl.
553	00:23:23,236	00:23:24,487	All right!	All right!
554	00:23:25,988	00:23:27,490	Dictation.	Dictation.
555	00:23:30,576	00:23:33,246	Classified ad to run in all Berlin papers.	Classified ad to run in all Berlin papers.
556	00:23:33,329	00:23:34,247	Quote...	Quote...
557	00:23:34,330	00:23:36,082	"Attractive middle-aged executive...	"Attractive middle-aged executive...
558	00:23:36,165	00:23:38,375	"wants attractive, young secretary."	"wants attractive, young secretary."
559	00:23:38,376	00:23:40,920	"Must be versatile and cooperative."	"Must be versatile and cooperative."
560	00:23:40,962	00:23:44,132	"Excellent salary, congenial working conditions..."	"Excellent salary, congenial working conditions..."
561	00:23:44,215	00:23:46,259	"Fringe benefits."	"Fringe benefits."
562	00:23:46,342	00:23:49,554	Fringe benefits? What is that?	Fringe benefits? What is that?
563	00:23:49,595	00:23:51,055	Little extras...	Little extras...
564	00:23:51,097	00:23:52,473	like, for instance, this morning...	like, for instance, this morning...
565	00:23:52,557	00:23:55,101	I was passing that fancy shop on the Kurfuerstendamm...	I was passing that fancy shop on the Kurfuerstendamm...
566	00:23:55,184	00:23:56,602	and there was this white silk dress in the window...	and there was this white silk dress in the window...
567	00:23:56,644	00:23:58,688	with polka dots all over it and a matching hat.	with polka dots all over it and a matching hat.
568	00:23:58,729	00:24:00,815	And a bag? And matching shoes?	And a bag? And matching shoes?
569	00:24:00,898	00:24:02,692	Why not?	Why not?
570	00:24:02,733	00:24:03,693	I'll take the job.	I'll take the job.
571	00:24:03,734	00:24:05,153	You got it.	You got it.
572	00:24:05,236	00:24:06,154	Danke schön.	Danke schön.
573	00:24:06,237	00:24:07,488	You're welcome.	You're welcome.
574	00:24:10,783	00:24:13,035	Please. Not while you're chewing gum.	Please. Not while you're chewing gum.
575	00:24:17,248	00:24:18,833	Uh, that'll be all, Fräulein Ingeborg.	Uh, that'll be all, Fräulein Ingeborg.
576	00:24:18,916	00:24:20,918	- More later. - Anytime.	- More later. - Anytime.
577	00:24:20,960	00:24:22,086	Yes, Schlemmer?	Yes, Schlemmer?
578	00:24:22,128	00:24:24,213	I called the garage. I called his wife.	I called the garage. I called his wife.
579	00:24:24,255	00:24:25,381	No Fritz.	No Fritz.
580	00:24:25,423	00:24:26,757	I can see this is going to be one of those days.	I can see this is going to be one of those days.
581	00:24:26,799	00:24:27,842	You better call the police.	You better call the police.
582	00:24:27,925	00:24:28,843	I already did.	I already did.
583	00:24:28,926	00:24:30,428	Gave them a complete description of the car...	Gave them a complete description of the car...
584	00:24:30,511	00:24:32,722	Model, license number, engine number.	Model, license number, engine number.
585	00:24:32,763	00:24:33,764	You're a good man, Schlemmer.	You're a good man, Schlemmer.
586	00:24:33,806	00:24:34,765	Thank you, sir.	Thank you, sir.
587	00:24:34,807	00:24:35,766	Schlemmer, how much are we paying you?	Schlemmer, how much are we paying you?
588	00:24:35,808	00:24:36,767	Two hundred marks a week.	Two hundred marks a week.
589	00:24:36,809	00:24:38,436	Let's see. That would be about fifty dollars.	Let's see. That would be about fifty dollars.
590	00:24:38,561	00:24:39,770	- That's all. - That's enough.	- That's all. - That's enough.
591	00:24:39,854	00:24:40,855	Yes, sir.	Yes, sir.
592	00:24:42,982	00:24:45,234	Hello? Hello? Yes?	Hello? Hello? Yes?
593	00:24:45,276	00:24:47,570	Atlanta, Georgia? Put it through.	Atlanta, Georgia? Put it through.
594	00:24:47,653	00:24:49,697	MacNamara, what's going on there in Berlin?	MacNamara, what's going on there in Berlin?
595	00:24:49,739	00:24:51,407	I have a letter here from Scarlett.	I have a letter here from Scarlett.
596	00:24:51,449	00:24:54,827	It says she's been going to operas, concerts, museums.	It says she's been going to operas, concerts, museums.
597	00:24:54,911	00:24:56,829	That doesn't sound like my little girl.	That doesn't sound like my little girl.
598	00:24:56,913	00:24:58,873	Oh, you're going to be surprised, Mr. Hazeltine.	Oh, you're going to be surprised, Mr. Hazeltine.
599	00:24:58,915	00:25:00,625	She's a different person now.	She's a different person now.
600	00:25:00,708	00:25:01,834	Oh, I don't mind telling you.	Oh, I don't mind telling you.
601	00:25:01,918	00:25:03,461	We were a little worried when she first arrived...	We were a little worried when she first arrived...
602	00:25:03,544	00:25:05,004	but she turned out just fine.	but she turned out just fine.
603	00:25:05,087	00:25:07,340	Well, I'll be damned!	Well, I'll be damned!
604	00:25:07,423	00:25:08,758	Anyway, you'll be relieved to know...	Anyway, you'll be relieved to know...
605	00:25:08,799	00:25:11,302	that Mrs. Hazeltine and I are leaving for Europe today...	that Mrs. Hazeltine and I are leaving for Europe today...
606	00:25:11,385	00:25:13,471	and we're going to take Scarlett off your hands.	and we're going to take Scarlett off your hands.
607	00:25:13,554	00:25:14,680	We'll be sorry to lose her.	We'll be sorry to lose her.
608	00:25:14,764	00:25:16,766	No, it was no bother at all.	No, it was no bother at all.
609	00:25:16,849	00:25:19,060	Two weeks, two months. What's the difference?	Two weeks, two months. What's the difference?
610	00:25:19,101	00:25:20,186	Well, I want you to know...	Well, I want you to know...
611	00:25:20,269	00:25:22,230	that we're mighty grateful to you, MacNamara.	that we're mighty grateful to you, MacNamara.
612	00:25:22,271	00:25:23,898	Actually, the reason I'm making this trip...	Actually, the reason I'm making this trip...
613	00:25:23,981	00:25:25,900	There's gonna be a shift in personnel.	There's gonna be a shift in personnel.
614	00:25:25,983	00:25:28,236	We're naming a new head of European operations...	We're naming a new head of European operations...
615	00:25:28,277	00:25:30,655	and you won't be forgotten, Mac.	and you won't be forgotten, Mac.
616	00:25:30,738	00:25:32,448	The London job?	The London job?
617	00:25:32,532	00:25:35,117	Well, I don't know what to say.	Well, I don't know what to say.
618	00:25:35,201	00:25:37,411	I never expected anything like that.	I never expected anything like that.
619	00:25:37,495	00:25:39,080	Just to be considered for the job...	Just to be considered for the job...
620	00:25:39,163	00:25:40,081	is a great honor.	is a great honor.
621	00:25:40,164	00:25:41,123	Of course, I have been with the company...	Of course, I have been with the company...
622	00:25:41,207	00:25:42,500	for the past fifteen years...	for the past fifteen years...
623	00:25:42,583	00:25:45,086	and I know the European market like the inside of my pocket...	and I know the European market like the inside of my pocket...
624	00:25:45,127	00:25:46,087	It's your wife on the other phone.	It's your wife on the other phone.
625	00:25:46,128	00:25:47,088	She must talk to you.	She must talk to you.
626	00:25:47,171	00:25:48,089	Not now. I'm on long distance.	Not now. I'm on long distance.
627	00:25:48,172	00:25:49,757	I told her that, but she insists.	I told her that, but she insists.
628	00:25:49,799	00:25:51,217	Would you hold on a minute, Mr. Hazeltine?	Would you hold on a minute, Mr. Hazeltine?
629	00:25:51,259	00:25:54,011	There's a little emergency in the accounting department.	There's a little emergency in the accounting department.
630	00:25:55,096	00:25:56,973	What is it, Phyllis? What's so important?	What is it, Phyllis? What's so important?
631	00:25:57,056	00:25:59,433	Well, if you put it that way, nothing, really.	Well, if you put it that way, nothing, really.
632	00:25:59,517	00:26:00,810	I just thought you might be interested...	I just thought you might be interested...
633	00:26:00,893	00:26:03,396	in what's going on around the house, mein Führer.	in what's going on around the house, mein Führer.
634	00:26:03,479	00:26:04,689	You out of your mind?	You out of your mind?
635	00:26:04,730	00:26:07,024	I'm talking to Mr. Hazeltine about the London job...	I'm talking to Mr. Hazeltine about the London job...
636	00:26:07,066	00:26:08,401	and you want to chitchat?	and you want to chitchat?
637	00:26:08,484	00:26:09,402	I'm sorry.	I'm sorry.
638	00:26:09,485	00:26:12,113	It's just that Miss Hazeltine is missing...	It's just that Miss Hazeltine is missing...
639	00:26:12,196	00:26:13,823	but we can discuss it some other time.	but we can discuss it some other time.
640	00:26:13,906	00:26:15,783	- Bye. - Bye.	- Bye. - Bye.
641	00:26:15,866	00:26:17,827	Missing?! Wait a minute, Phyllis.	Missing?! Wait a minute, Phyllis.
642	00:26:17,910	00:26:18,911	Phyllis!	Phyllis!
643	00:26:18,995	00:26:20,246	What do you mean she's missing?	What do you mean she's missing?
644	00:26:20,329	00:26:22,832	Bertha took her breakfast up, and she's not there.	Bertha took her breakfast up, and she's not there.
645	00:26:22,915	00:26:24,458	Her bed hasn't been slept in.	Her bed hasn't been slept in.
646	00:26:24,542	00:26:25,542	Well, that's ridiculous.	Well, that's ridiculous.
647	00:26:25,543	00:26:26,752	We got back from the movie around 11:00...	We got back from the movie around 11:00...
648	00:26:26,836	00:26:28,546	and Scarlett went right upstairs.	and Scarlett went right upstairs.
649	00:26:28,629	00:26:29,547	What could have happened to her?	What could have happened to her?
650	00:26:29,672	00:26:32,008	Who knows? Gone with the wind.	Who knows? Gone with the wind.
651	00:26:32,091	00:26:33,175	Maybe she ran away.	Maybe she ran away.
652	00:26:33,259	00:26:35,553	Maybe she was kidnapped by a white slave ring.	Maybe she was kidnapped by a white slave ring.
653	00:26:35,678	00:26:37,179	Oh, swell. Hold on, will you?	Oh, swell. Hold on, will you?
654	00:26:37,263	00:26:38,264	Trouble?	Trouble?
655	00:26:38,306	00:26:40,433	I wish I were in hell with my back broken.	I wish I were in hell with my back broken.
656	00:26:40,516	00:26:41,559	Sorry, Mr. Hazeltine.	Sorry, Mr. Hazeltine.
657	00:26:41,642	00:26:43,935	They come running to me with all their little problems.	They come running to me with all their little problems.
658	00:26:43,936	00:26:45,146	Now, about your trip.	Now, about your trip.
659	00:26:45,229	00:26:46,230	What boat are you sailing on?	What boat are you sailing on?
660	00:26:46,314	00:26:48,149	Boat? Who's got time for that?	Boat? Who's got time for that?
661	00:26:48,232	00:26:49,358	Mrs. Hazeltine and I...	Mrs. Hazeltine and I...
662	00:26:49,400	00:26:51,152	are flying to New York this afternoon...	are flying to New York this afternoon...
663	00:26:51,235	00:26:52,862	taking the overnight jet to London.	taking the overnight jet to London.
664	00:26:52,903	00:26:54,530	There's a connecting flight to Berlin...	There's a connecting flight to Berlin...
665	00:26:54,572	00:26:56,741	and we'll be there at noon tomorrow.	and we'll be there at noon tomorrow.
666	00:26:56,782	00:26:58,993	Noon tomorrow? You mean our time?	Noon tomorrow? You mean our time?
667	00:26:59,076	00:27:01,912	Of course I'll tell Scarlett, first chance I get.	Of course I'll tell Scarlett, first chance I get.
668	00:27:01,996	00:27:02,913	Yes, sir.	Yes, sir.
669	00:27:02,997	00:27:04,999	We'll see you at the airport unless those damn Commies...	We'll see you at the airport unless those damn Commies...
670	00:27:05,082	00:27:06,250	shoot the plane down.	shoot the plane down.
671	00:27:06,292	00:27:08,085	Yeah. Auf Wiedersehen.	Yeah. Auf Wiedersehen.
672	00:27:08,169	00:27:10,421	For God's sake, Phyllis, we've got to find that idiot.	For God's sake, Phyllis, we've got to find that idiot.
673	00:27:10,463	00:27:11,964	Her parents are arriving tomorrow.	Her parents are arriving tomorrow.
674	00:27:12,048	00:27:13,341	Where could she be?	Where could she be?
675	00:27:13,883	00:27:16,469	She doesn't know anybody in Berlin except us.	She doesn't know anybody in Berlin except us.
676	00:27:17,470	00:27:18,679	Well, have Bertha look again.	Well, have Bertha look again.
677	00:27:18,763	00:27:20,181	Maybe she left a note.	Maybe she left a note.
678	00:27:20,264	00:27:22,266	What about her luggage?	What about her luggage?
679	00:27:22,308	00:27:24,352	Well, I'm glad to hear something is still there.	Well, I'm glad to hear something is still there.
680	00:27:24,435	00:27:26,395	No, I'm not blaming you.	No, I'm not blaming you.
681	00:27:26,479	00:27:28,439	It's just that lousy MacNamara luck.	It's just that lousy MacNamara luck.
682	00:27:28,522	00:27:29,732	First I lost a bottling plant...	First I lost a bottling plant...
683	00:27:29,815	00:27:31,817	and now I lose the boss' daughter!	and now I lose the boss' daughter!
684	00:27:35,988	00:27:37,156	I think we are getting someplace.	I think we are getting someplace.
685	00:27:37,239	00:27:39,158	We found Fritz.	We found Fritz.
686	00:27:39,241	00:27:41,243	Fritz? To hell with Fritz!	Fritz? To hell with Fritz!
687	00:27:41,285	00:27:43,245	It's the girl we're looking for now.	It's the girl we're looking for now.
688	00:27:43,329	00:27:45,623	Precisely. He has some information.	Precisely. He has some information.
689	00:27:48,042	00:27:49,126	Where is she?	Where is she?
690	00:27:49,210	00:27:51,629	I do not know, not precisely...	I do not know, not precisely...
691	00:27:51,754	00:27:53,798	but last night, I dropped her at the Brandenburg Gate.	but last night, I dropped her at the Brandenburg Gate.
692	00:27:53,881	00:27:54,965	The Brandenburg Gate? Why?	The Brandenburg Gate? Why?
693	00:27:55,049	00:27:56,550	Because that is where I drop her every night...	Because that is where I drop her every night...
694	00:27:56,592	00:27:58,177	and that is where I pick her up every morning.	and that is where I pick her up every morning.
695	00:27:58,260	00:28:00,262	How long has this been going on?	How long has this been going on?
696	00:28:00,304	00:28:01,764	Since last month, sir.	Since last month, sir.
697	00:28:01,806	00:28:02,932	Usually, I get her back to the house...	Usually, I get her back to the house...
698	00:28:02,973	00:28:04,350	before you wake up, but this morning...	before you wake up, but this morning...
699	00:28:04,433	00:28:05,643	I wait for her, and I wait.	I wait for her, and I wait.
700	00:28:05,768	00:28:07,561	You mean, you've been helping her sneak out behind my back?	You mean, you've been helping her sneak out behind my back?
701	00:28:07,603	00:28:09,522	Yes, sir, but I have a very good excuse.	Yes, sir, but I have a very good excuse.
702	00:28:09,563	00:28:10,523	What?	What?
703	00:28:10,564	00:28:11,607	She pays me a hundred marks a night...	She pays me a hundred marks a night...
704	00:28:11,691	00:28:13,526	Fifty for driving her, fifty for not telling you.	Fifty for driving her, fifty for not telling you.
705	00:28:13,567	00:28:14,735	Do I have your permission to fire him?	Do I have your permission to fire him?
706	00:28:14,777	00:28:16,070	Not yet!	Not yet!
707	00:28:16,112	00:28:18,406	Now, let's go step by step.	Now, let's go step by step.
708	00:28:18,447	00:28:20,241	After you drop her at the Brandenburg Gate...	After you drop her at the Brandenburg Gate...
709	00:28:20,282	00:28:21,450	what does she do?	what does she do?
710	00:28:21,534	00:28:24,328	She crosses the border into East Berlin.	She crosses the border into East Berlin.
711	00:28:24,412	00:28:25,413	East Berlin?	East Berlin?
712	00:28:25,454	00:28:26,539	That is why I am so worried...	That is why I am so worried...
713	00:28:26,580	00:28:28,457	because this morning, she did not come back.	because this morning, she did not come back.
714	00:28:28,541	00:28:29,875	You're worried?	You're worried?
715	00:28:29,917	00:28:32,628	I'm going down in flames, and he's worried.	I'm going down in flames, and he's worried.
716	00:28:34,296	00:28:36,424	Ingeborg, clear the switchboard.	Ingeborg, clear the switchboard.
717	00:28:36,507	00:28:37,883	I want Brigadier General Hartel...	I want Brigadier General Hartel...
718	00:28:37,925	00:28:39,510	Commanding Officer of the American sector.	Commanding Officer of the American sector.
719	00:28:39,593	00:28:41,595	Next, get me Mayor Willy Brandt.	Next, get me Mayor Willy Brandt.
720	00:28:41,637	00:28:42,596	Next, get me the Police Commissioner...	Next, get me the Police Commissioner...
721	00:28:42,680	00:28:43,848	of West Berlin.	of West Berlin.
722	00:28:43,931	00:28:46,392	Next, I want to speak to the U.S. Ambassador in Bonn.	Next, I want to speak to the U.S. Ambassador in Bonn.
723	00:28:46,434	00:28:47,977	You got that? OK.	You got that? OK.
724	00:28:49,186	00:28:51,230	Fritz, you wait downstairs. I may need you later.	Fritz, you wait downstairs. I may need you later.
725	00:28:51,313	00:28:53,315	Schlemmer, how can we find out what happened to her?	Schlemmer, how can we find out what happened to her?
726	00:28:53,399	00:28:55,443	Can we get any information from East Berlin?	Can we get any information from East Berlin?
727	00:28:55,526	00:28:57,069	Only through official channels in triplicate.	Only through official channels in triplicate.
728	00:28:57,153	00:28:58,070	What if we just picked up the phone...	What if we just picked up the phone...
729	00:28:58,154	00:28:59,155	and called the authorities over there?	and called the authorities over there?
730	00:28:59,238	00:29:00,239	It is not that easy.	It is not that easy.
731	00:29:00,322	00:29:01,240	Why not?	Why not?
732	00:29:01,323	00:29:03,325	There's no direct phone service to East Berlin.	There's no direct phone service to East Berlin.
733	00:29:03,409	00:29:04,326	You have to call Stockholm.	You have to call Stockholm.
734	00:29:04,410	00:29:05,494	From there it goes through Warsaw...	From there it goes through Warsaw...
735	00:29:05,578	00:29:07,371	to Leipzig, then to East Berlin...	to Leipzig, then to East Berlin...
736	00:29:07,413	00:29:09,415	and then, nine times out of ten, you get the wrong number.	and then, nine times out of ten, you get the wrong number.
737	00:29:09,457	00:29:11,208	- Try it anyway. - Yes, sir.	- Try it anyway. - Yes, sir.
738	00:29:16,297	00:29:17,298	Schnellmachen!	Schnellmachen!
739	00:29:20,676	00:29:22,178	Yes?	Yes?
740	00:29:22,261	00:29:24,263	General Hartel is out on army maneuvers?	General Hartel is out on army maneuvers?
741	00:29:24,346	00:29:26,515	Well, what about Mayor Willy Brandt?	Well, what about Mayor Willy Brandt?
742	00:29:26,599	00:29:27,850	He's watching the maneuvers.	He's watching the maneuvers.
743	00:29:27,933	00:29:29,351	And the Police Commissioner?	And the Police Commissioner?
744	00:29:29,435	00:29:30,728	I see. He's watching Willy Brandt.	I see. He's watching Willy Brandt.
745	00:29:30,811	00:29:32,897	So who's minding the store?	So who's minding the store?
746	00:29:32,938	00:29:34,648	What about the call to Bonn?	What about the call to Bonn?
747	00:29:34,732	00:29:35,858	Our ambassador is back in Washington...	Our ambassador is back in Washington...
748	00:29:35,900	00:29:37,318	for consultation?	for consultation?
749	00:29:37,401	00:29:38,903	Come in, come in. I'll be right with you.	Come in, come in. I'll be right with you.
750	00:29:38,986	00:29:40,279	Get me Washington, the State Department...	Get me Washington, the State Department...
751	00:29:40,362	00:29:41,530	whoever answers...	whoever answers...
752	00:29:41,572	00:29:43,657	Dean Rusk, Dean Acheson, Dean anybody.	Dean Rusk, Dean Acheson, Dean anybody.
753	00:29:43,741	00:29:44,909	And if you have no luck there...	And if you have no luck there...
754	00:29:44,950	00:29:46,535	get me Senator Talmadge of Georgia...	get me Senator Talmadge of Georgia...
755	00:29:46,577	00:29:49,872	and if he isn't in, try Huntley and Brinkley at NBC.	and if he isn't in, try Huntley and Brinkley at NBC.
756	00:29:50,748	00:29:51,916	Scarlett!	Scarlett!
757	00:29:51,999	00:29:53,834	What's all the excitement?	What's all the excitement?
758	00:29:53,918	00:29:56,086	Oh, nothing.	Oh, nothing.
759	00:29:56,170	00:29:57,630	You just scared the hell out of us!	You just scared the hell out of us!
760	00:29:57,713	00:29:58,714	You all right?	You all right?
761	00:29:58,756	00:30:00,508	I'm just marvy.	I'm just marvy.
762	00:30:00,591	00:30:01,884	What were you doing in East Berlin?	What were you doing in East Berlin?
763	00:30:01,926	00:30:03,302	You mean, last night?	You mean, last night?
764	00:30:03,385	00:30:05,304	I mean all those nights.	I mean all those nights.
765	00:30:05,387	00:30:07,681	You see, there's this boy over there.	You see, there's this boy over there.
766	00:30:07,765	00:30:09,016	Wow!	Wow!
767	00:30:09,099	00:30:10,643	What boy? What have you been up to?	What boy? What have you been up to?
768	00:30:10,726	00:30:13,020	Well, I met him about six weeks ago.	Well, I met him about six weeks ago.
769	00:30:13,062	00:30:15,523	I went into East Berlin, and there was this parade...	I went into East Berlin, and there was this parade...
770	00:30:15,564	00:30:17,233	and they wanted to arrest me.	and they wanted to arrest me.
771	00:30:17,316	00:30:18,776	Arrest you?	Arrest you?
772	00:30:18,859	00:30:20,653	Because I was taking pictures.	Because I was taking pictures.
773	00:30:20,736	00:30:23,531	And then this boy... He was in the parade...	And then this boy... He was in the parade...
774	00:30:23,572	00:30:25,574	He said to the policemen I shouldn't be arrested.	He said to the policemen I shouldn't be arrested.
775	00:30:25,658	00:30:29,745	I should be pitied because I was a typical bourgeois parasite...	I should be pitied because I was a typical bourgeois parasite...
776	00:30:29,787	00:30:33,749	and the rotten fruit of a corrupt civilization.	and the rotten fruit of a corrupt civilization.
777	00:30:33,791	00:30:36,293	So naturally, I fell in love with him.	So naturally, I fell in love with him.
778	00:30:36,377	00:30:37,920	Naturally.	Naturally.
779	00:30:38,003	00:30:39,672	Want to see his picture?	Want to see his picture?
780	00:30:39,755	00:30:40,798	Not particularly.	Not particularly.
781	00:30:40,881	00:30:42,925	Now, I want your honest opinion.	Now, I want your honest opinion.
782	00:30:45,636	00:30:47,888	Isn't he beautiful?	Isn't he beautiful?
783	00:30:48,556	00:30:51,267	You fell in love with Khrushchev?	You fell in love with Khrushchev?
784	00:30:51,308	00:30:55,020	No, silly, the one that's carrying Khrushchev.	No, silly, the one that's carrying Khrushchev.
785	00:30:55,062	00:30:57,064	His name's Otto.	His name's Otto.
786	00:30:57,106	00:30:58,607	I finally got East Berlin on the phone...	I finally got East Berlin on the phone...
787	00:30:58,691	00:31:01,235	and just like I told you, wrong number.	and just like I told you, wrong number.
788	00:31:01,318	00:31:02,653	Hi there.	Hi there.
789	00:31:02,736	00:31:03,946	Now, you and this Otto...	Now, you and this Otto...
790	00:31:04,029	00:31:06,240	exactly what do you do when you're together?	exactly what do you do when you're together?
791	00:31:06,323	00:31:08,158	Oh, all kinds of goodies.	Oh, all kinds of goodies.
792	00:31:08,242	00:31:11,078	I wash his shirts, and he broadens my mind...	I wash his shirts, and he broadens my mind...
793	00:31:11,120	00:31:13,747	and if it's a warm night, we go lie on the roof...	and if it's a warm night, we go lie on the roof...
794	00:31:13,789	00:31:16,250	and watch the Sputniks go by.	and watch the Sputniks go by.
795	00:31:16,333	00:31:17,376	Is that all?	Is that all?
796	00:31:17,418	00:31:20,296	Well, last night, we were blowing up balloons.	Well, last night, we were blowing up balloons.
797	00:31:20,379	00:31:21,589	Balloons?	Balloons?
798	00:31:21,672	00:31:23,007	You know.	You know.
799	00:31:25,843	00:31:27,052	It's a Communist trick!	It's a Communist trick!
800	00:31:27,094	00:31:29,430	When the wind is right, they float them across...	When the wind is right, they float them across...
801	00:31:29,471	00:31:31,015	to undermine our morale.	to undermine our morale.
802	00:31:32,725	00:31:34,184	"Yankee go home"?	"Yankee go home"?
803	00:31:34,268	00:31:37,229	They come in all colors... Green and yellow and blue.	They come in all colors... Green and yellow and blue.
804	00:31:37,313	00:31:38,230	You've been helping this guy to spread...	You've been helping this guy to spread...
805	00:31:38,314	00:31:39,773	anti-American propaganda?	anti-American propaganda?
806	00:31:39,857	00:31:43,027	It's not anti-American. It's anti-Yankee...	It's not anti-American. It's anti-Yankee...
807	00:31:43,068	00:31:46,530	and where I come from, everybody's against the Yankees.	and where I come from, everybody's against the Yankees.
808	00:31:46,572	00:31:48,449	I have good mind to change this to "Russki go home"...	I have good mind to change this to "Russki go home"...
809	00:31:48,532	00:31:49,450	and when the wind blows the other way...	and when the wind blows the other way...
810	00:31:49,533	00:31:50,576	OK. OK.	OK. OK.
811	00:31:50,659	00:31:52,536	Now, you listen to me, Scarlett Hazeltine.	Now, you listen to me, Scarlett Hazeltine.
812	00:31:52,578	00:31:53,913	There's gonna be no more of this foolishness...	There's gonna be no more of this foolishness...
813	00:31:53,996	00:31:56,540	because tomorrow, your parents are coming to take you home.	because tomorrow, your parents are coming to take you home.
814	00:31:56,582	00:31:57,875	They are?	They are?
815	00:31:59,209	00:32:02,046	Who? Chet Huntley?	Who? Chet Huntley?
816	00:32:02,087	00:32:03,255	All right. I'll speak to him.	All right. I'll speak to him.
817	00:32:03,339	00:32:04,423	Hello, Mr. Huntley.	Hello, Mr. Huntley.
818	00:32:04,465	00:32:05,883	I just want to tell you I've been watching your program.	I just want to tell you I've been watching your program.
819	00:32:05,966	00:32:07,593	Keep up the good work. Bye!	Keep up the good work. Bye!
820	00:32:07,676	00:32:08,719	Now, when your parents arrive...	Now, when your parents arrive...
821	00:32:08,761	00:32:10,554	I want you to keep your mouth shut...	I want you to keep your mouth shut...
822	00:32:10,596	00:32:12,139	for your sake and mine...	for your sake and mine...
823	00:32:12,222	00:32:14,141	because if they ever find out what's been going on...	because if they ever find out what's been going on...
824	00:32:14,224	00:32:15,643	I better talk this over with Otto.	I better talk this over with Otto.
825	00:32:15,726	00:32:16,685	Oh, no, you don't!	Oh, no, you don't!
826	00:32:16,727	00:32:17,853	You're not gonna see him again...	You're not gonna see him again...
827	00:32:17,895	00:32:19,563	and you're not going back to East Berlin.	and you're not going back to East Berlin.
828	00:32:19,647	00:32:21,774	Oh. He's right downstairs.	Oh. He's right downstairs.
829	00:32:23,317	00:32:24,443	Otto!	Otto!
830	00:32:26,445	00:32:28,739	Otto, darling!	Otto, darling!
831	00:32:29,782	00:32:31,408	Up here.	Up here.
832	00:32:33,118	00:32:35,412	Come on up, Liebchen.	Come on up, Liebchen.
833	00:32:40,084	00:32:41,377	Liebchen?	Liebchen?
834	00:32:41,418	00:32:43,379	I don't want that creep in my office.	I don't want that creep in my office.
835	00:32:43,420	00:32:45,673	Why don't you send him home to clean out his cage?	Why don't you send him home to clean out his cage?
836	00:32:45,756	00:32:46,674	I think he better be here...	I think he better be here...
837	00:32:46,757	00:32:49,051	because we have something to tell you.	because we have something to tell you.
838	00:32:49,093	00:32:50,719	Tell me what?	Tell me what?
839	00:32:50,761	00:32:52,054	You're not engaged again, are you?	You're not engaged again, are you?
840	00:32:52,096	00:32:53,347	No, not this time.	No, not this time.
841	00:32:53,430	00:32:54,723	- Thank God. - We're married.	- Thank God. - We're married.
842	00:32:54,765	00:32:56,100	For a minute there, I was afraid...	For a minute there, I was afraid...
843	00:32:57,518	00:32:58,477	You're married?	You're married?
844	00:32:58,519	00:33:00,854	Uh-huh. It will be six weeks on Monday.	Uh-huh. It will be six weeks on Monday.
845	00:33:00,896	00:33:02,231	You married a Communist?	You married a Communist?
846	00:33:02,314	00:33:04,149	He's not a Communist. He's a republican.	He's not a Communist. He's a republican.
847	00:33:04,233	00:33:06,735	He comes from the Republic of East Germany.	He comes from the Republic of East Germany.
848	00:33:06,819	00:33:09,947	Why, you dumb, stupid little pot!	Why, you dumb, stupid little pot!
849	00:33:10,030	00:33:11,907	Do you realize what you've done?	Do you realize what you've done?
850	00:33:11,991	00:33:13,575	You've ruined me, that's all.	You've ruined me, that's all.
851	00:33:13,659	00:33:15,077	What are your parents going to say?	What are your parents going to say?
852	00:33:15,160	00:33:16,745	They trusted me, and I trusted you.	They trusted me, and I trusted you.
853	00:33:16,787	00:33:19,540	Then you go and pull an idiotic stunt like this.	Then you go and pull an idiotic stunt like this.
854	00:33:19,581	00:33:21,959	Why didn't you look after me better?	Why didn't you look after me better?
855	00:33:22,084	00:33:24,878	Fifteen years with the company down the drain.	Fifteen years with the company down the drain.
856	00:33:24,920	00:33:26,547	I'll be blacklisted.	I'll be blacklisted.
857	00:33:26,588	00:33:27,756	My kids will starve.	My kids will starve.
858	00:33:27,840	00:33:29,466	My wife will be selling pencils!	My wife will be selling pencils!
859	00:33:29,550	00:33:31,719	And all on account of you and your hot blood.	And all on account of you and your hot blood.
860	00:33:33,762	00:33:36,390	Come in. Come in, Otto.	Come in. Come in, Otto.
861	00:33:41,645	00:33:43,856	This is Mr. MacNamara.	This is Mr. MacNamara.
862	00:33:43,897	00:33:46,734	My husband... Otto Ludwig Piffl.	My husband... Otto Ludwig Piffl.
863	00:33:46,775	00:33:49,653	Piffl? Wouldn't you know.	Piffl? Wouldn't you know.
864	00:33:53,907	00:33:55,159	Where did you dig him up?	Where did you dig him up?
865	00:33:55,242	00:33:57,244	He doesn't even wear socks.	He doesn't even wear socks.
866	00:33:57,286	00:33:59,371	He doesn't wear shorts, either.	He doesn't wear shorts, either.
867	00:34:00,080	00:34:02,082	Isn't that exciting?	Isn't that exciting?
868	00:34:04,251	00:34:05,711	Take your cap off.	Take your cap off.
869	00:34:05,753	00:34:06,712	Why?	Why?
870	00:34:06,754	00:34:08,714	Because I said so.	Because I said so.
871	00:34:10,257	00:34:12,760	In Lenin's tomb, I take my cap off.	In Lenin's tomb, I take my cap off.
872	00:34:12,843	00:34:14,595	If Van Cliburn plays Tchaikovsky...	If Van Cliburn plays Tchaikovsky...
873	00:34:14,636	00:34:16,096	I take my cap off...	I take my cap off...
874	00:34:16,180	00:34:19,975	but in Coca-Cola office, phooey!	but in Coca-Cola office, phooey!
875	00:34:20,059	00:34:22,436	Do it for me, Otto, darling.	Do it for me, Otto, darling.
876	00:34:22,519	00:34:24,104	For you, I do it.	For you, I do it.
877	00:34:24,188	00:34:25,814	He could use a haircut...	He could use a haircut...
878	00:34:25,898	00:34:27,191	and I'd like to give it to him myself...	and I'd like to give it to him myself...
879	00:34:27,232	00:34:28,901	with a hammer and sickle.	with a hammer and sickle.
880	00:34:28,942	00:34:29,902	Warmonger.	Warmonger.
881	00:34:29,943	00:34:30,903	Shut up, you punk.	Shut up, you punk.
882	00:34:30,944	00:34:32,488	Don't you talk like that to my husband.	Don't you talk like that to my husband.
883	00:34:32,571	00:34:33,572	He's not your husband!	He's not your husband!
884	00:34:33,614	00:34:35,449	In the first place, she's underage.	In the first place, she's underage.
885	00:34:35,532	00:34:38,077	Next, we don't recognize the government of East Germany.	Next, we don't recognize the government of East Germany.
886	00:34:38,118	00:34:40,579	Next, she admits that while she was washing your shirts...	Next, she admits that while she was washing your shirts...
887	00:34:40,662	00:34:42,247	you were washing her brain!	you were washing her brain!
888	00:34:42,289	00:34:43,999	So the whole thing is illegal.	So the whole thing is illegal.
889	00:34:44,041	00:34:46,042	No, it's not. I have a certificate.	No, it's not. I have a certificate.
890	00:34:46,043	00:34:48,712	And tell him about the wedding rings.	And tell him about the wedding rings.
891	00:34:48,754	00:34:50,798	Forged from the steel of a brave cannon...	Forged from the steel of a brave cannon...
892	00:34:50,881	00:34:53,175	that fought at Stalingrad.	that fought at Stalingrad.
893	00:34:53,258	00:34:54,593	I don't care who your jeweler is!	I don't care who your jeweler is!
894	00:34:54,635	00:34:56,011	The marriage is illegal.	The marriage is illegal.
895	00:34:56,053	00:34:57,596	You say, but in the eyes...	You say, but in the eyes...
896	00:34:57,638	00:34:59,306	of the People's Republic of East Germany...	of the People's Republic of East Germany...
897	00:34:59,389	00:35:00,599	we are husband and wife.	we are husband and wife.
898	00:35:00,641	00:35:02,059	You are not in East Germany now.	You are not in East Germany now.
899	00:35:02,184	00:35:04,186	You are in West Berlin, and I can have you arrested...	You are in West Berlin, and I can have you arrested...
900	00:35:04,269	00:35:06,396	for lying on rooftops with a minor.	for lying on rooftops with a minor.
901	00:35:06,438	00:35:09,066	Of course you can. I know your tactics.	Of course you can. I know your tactics.
902	00:35:09,149	00:35:11,068	You can have me arrested. You can have tortured.	You can have me arrested. You can have tortured.
903	00:35:11,110	00:35:14,071	You can have me shot like you've been doing in the Congo!	You can have me shot like you've been doing in the Congo!
904	00:35:14,113	00:35:16,115	Africa for the Africans!	Africa for the Africans!
905	00:35:16,782	00:35:18,158	All I want from you, Scarlett Piffl...	All I want from you, Scarlett Piffl...
906	00:35:18,242	00:35:20,327	is silence and damn little of that.	is silence and damn little of that.
907	00:35:20,410	00:35:22,454	Don't you talk like that to my wife!	Don't you talk like that to my wife!
908	00:35:23,539	00:35:25,374	Who? Brinkley?	Who? Brinkley?
909	00:35:25,415	00:35:27,793	Well, tell him I already gave the message to Huntley.	Well, tell him I already gave the message to Huntley.
910	00:35:29,920	00:35:31,755	Look, Otto baby.	Look, Otto baby.
911	00:35:31,839	00:35:33,799	If we're to live together in peaceful coexistence...	If we're to live together in peaceful coexistence...
912	00:35:33,882	00:35:35,926	there must be a certain amount of give-and-take.	there must be a certain amount of give-and-take.
913	00:35:35,968	00:35:37,594	How'd you like a thousand marks?	How'd you like a thousand marks?
914	00:35:37,636	00:35:38,846	For what?	For what?
915	00:35:38,929	00:35:40,848	Just get on your motorcycle, go back where you came from...	Just get on your motorcycle, go back where you came from...
916	00:35:40,931	00:35:41,890	and forget about the whole thing.	and forget about the whole thing.
917	00:35:41,932	00:35:43,642	You can't bribe him.	You can't bribe him.
918	00:35:43,725	00:35:44,685	Two thousand?	Two thousand?
919	00:35:44,768	00:35:45,686	How about five thousand?	How about five thousand?
920	00:35:45,727	00:35:46,854	Otto, what are you saying?	Otto, what are you saying?
921	00:35:46,895	00:35:48,188	OK. Five thousand marks.	OK. Five thousand marks.
922	00:35:48,230	00:35:50,566	If it's worth five thousand, why not fifty thousand?	If it's worth five thousand, why not fifty thousand?
923	00:35:50,607	00:35:52,609	Fifty thousand? You crazy?	Fifty thousand? You crazy?
924	00:35:53,277	00:35:54,736	I just want to see how far they will go...	I just want to see how far they will go...
925	00:35:54,820	00:35:57,739	to break up a happy Socialist marriage.	to break up a happy Socialist marriage.
926	00:35:57,823	00:35:59,575	I spit on your money.	I spit on your money.
927	00:35:59,616	00:36:01,076	I spit on Fort Knox!	I spit on Fort Knox!
928	00:36:01,118	00:36:03,245	I spit on Wall Street!	I spit on Wall Street!
929	00:36:03,328	00:36:05,205	Unsanitary little jerk, isn't he?	Unsanitary little jerk, isn't he?
930	00:36:05,247	00:36:07,291	You and your kind are doomed.	You and your kind are doomed.
931	00:36:07,374	00:36:08,625	We will take over West Berlin.	We will take over West Berlin.
932	00:36:08,709	00:36:10,127	We will take over Western Europe.	We will take over Western Europe.
933	00:36:10,210	00:36:11,420	We will bury you!	We will bury you!
934	00:36:11,461	00:36:12,588	Do me a favor, will you?	Do me a favor, will you?
935	00:36:12,671	00:36:14,423	Bury us, but don't marry us.	Bury us, but don't marry us.
936	00:36:14,464	00:36:17,926	Look at all this waste.	Look at all this waste.
937	00:36:18,635	00:36:22,306	Capitalism is like a dead herring in the moonlight.	Capitalism is like a dead herring in the moonlight.
938	00:36:22,389	00:36:24,725	It shines, but it stinks!	It shines, but it stinks!
939	00:36:24,766	00:36:27,603	He talks like that all the time.	He talks like that all the time.
940	00:36:27,686	00:36:29,813	Tell him about Coca-Cola colonialism.	Tell him about Coca-Cola colonialism.
941	00:36:29,897	00:36:30,814	What?	What?
942	00:36:30,898	00:36:32,232	As chairman Khrushchev said...	As chairman Khrushchev said...
943	00:36:32,316	00:36:34,443	on the 40th anniversary of the revolution...	on the 40th anniversary of the revolution...
944	00:36:34,526	00:36:37,779	To hell with the revolution and to hell with Khrushchev!	To hell with the revolution and to hell with Khrushchev!
945	00:36:39,489	00:36:41,867	The hell with Frank Sinatra.	The hell with Frank Sinatra.
946	00:36:42,409	00:36:44,244	Oh, it's gonna be a real clambake...	Oh, it's gonna be a real clambake...
947	00:36:44,286	00:36:45,662	when your folks get here tomorrow.	when your folks get here tomorrow.
948	00:36:45,746	00:36:47,915	How are we gonna explain this?	How are we gonna explain this?
949	00:36:47,956	00:36:51,001	That's your problem because I won't be here.	That's your problem because I won't be here.
950	00:36:51,084	00:36:52,628	What do you mean, you won't be here?	What do you mean, you won't be here?
951	00:36:52,711	00:36:55,589	Tonight, my wife and I are leaving for Moscow.	Tonight, my wife and I are leaving for Moscow.
952	00:36:55,631	00:36:57,424	Moscow?	Moscow?
953	00:36:57,466	00:36:59,092	That's what I came to tell you.	That's what I came to tell you.
954	00:36:59,134	00:37:00,260	He's got a scholarship...	He's got a scholarship...
955	00:37:00,344	00:37:02,763	to the People's Technological Institute.	to the People's Technological Institute.
956	00:37:02,846	00:37:05,057	He's studying to be a missile engineer.	He's studying to be a missile engineer.
957	00:37:05,098	00:37:06,725	Soviet missiles...	Soviet missiles...
958	00:37:07,935	00:37:09,728	Venus!	Venus!
959	00:37:09,770	00:37:11,104	American missiles...	American missiles...
960	00:37:12,022	00:37:14,066	Miami beach.	Miami beach.
961	00:37:16,443	00:37:20,739	So you just tell Daddy I'm on my way to the U.S.S.R.	So you just tell Daddy I'm on my way to the U.S.S.R.
962	00:37:20,822	00:37:22,991	That's short for Russia.	That's short for Russia.
963	00:37:25,369	00:37:28,080	Are you out of your seventeen-year-old mind?	Are you out of your seventeen-year-old mind?
964	00:37:28,121	00:37:29,581	Russia's to get out of, not to get into.	Russia's to get out of, not to get into.
965	00:37:29,665	00:37:31,124	Where Otto goes, I go!	Where Otto goes, I go!
966	00:37:31,208	00:37:33,085	You just try to stop us.	You just try to stop us.
967	00:37:33,168	00:37:34,586	Can you talk to your wife?	Can you talk to your wife?
968	00:37:34,670	00:37:36,713	Well, I certainly can't talk to them.	Well, I certainly can't talk to them.
969	00:37:36,755	00:37:37,923	On this phone.	On this phone.
970	00:37:40,217	00:37:41,760	Hello? Yes, dear.	Hello? Yes, dear.
971	00:37:41,843	00:37:43,219	Mac, hold everything.	Mac, hold everything.
972	00:37:43,220	00:37:44,846	I bet I know what happened to Scarlett.	I bet I know what happened to Scarlett.
973	00:37:44,930	00:37:47,432	Lucky Pierre must be back in town.	Lucky Pierre must be back in town.
974	00:37:47,516	00:37:50,852	It's not Lucky Pierre. It's Crazy Otto.	It's not Lucky Pierre. It's Crazy Otto.
975	00:37:50,894	00:37:51,895	Are you ready for this?	Are you ready for this?
976	00:37:51,979	00:37:54,398	She's married. That's right.	She's married. That's right.
977	00:37:54,439	00:37:56,358	She got herself an ever-loving, curly-haired...	She got herself an ever-loving, curly-haired...
978	00:37:56,400	00:37:58,235	card-carrying husband.	card-carrying husband.
979	00:37:59,403	00:38:01,697	She married a Communist?	She married a Communist?
980	00:38:02,197	00:38:04,658	This is gonna be the biggest thing to hit Atlanta...	This is gonna be the biggest thing to hit Atlanta...
981	00:38:04,741	00:38:07,411	since General Sherman threw that little barbecue.	since General Sherman threw that little barbecue.
982	00:38:08,120	00:38:09,705	No, I don't think it's funny.	No, I don't think it's funny.
983	00:38:10,247	00:38:13,750	They're gonna live in Moscow? Now, that's funny.	They're gonna live in Moscow? Now, that's funny.
984	00:38:13,834	00:38:16,252	Yeah, hysterical, but what can I do...	Yeah, hysterical, but what can I do...
985	00:38:16,253	00:38:17,879	go fight the Kremlin?	go fight the Kremlin?
986	00:38:17,921	00:38:19,131	I can't stop them.	I can't stop them.
987	00:38:19,214	00:38:20,716	They're young, they're in love...	They're young, they're in love...
988	00:38:20,757	00:38:23,218	and we're a dead herring in the moonlight...	and we're a dead herring in the moonlight...
989	00:38:23,260	00:38:26,972	so who am I to stand in the way of a happy Socialist marriage?	so who am I to stand in the way of a happy Socialist marriage?
990	00:38:27,055	00:38:28,974	Oh, come off it, Mac. I know you.	Oh, come off it, Mac. I know you.
991	00:38:29,057	00:38:31,018	You've got something up your sleeve.	You've got something up your sleeve.
992	00:38:31,101	00:38:34,187	I wouldn't be surprised. Bye.	I wouldn't be surprised. Bye.
993	00:38:34,813	00:38:37,274	Now, what time are you kids leaving?	Now, what time are you kids leaving?
994	00:38:37,357	00:38:39,776	7:00 on the Moscow Express.	7:00 on the Moscow Express.
995	00:38:39,860	00:38:40,777	Why do you want to know?	Why do you want to know?
996	00:38:40,861	00:38:42,779	Because I'm gonna dynamite the train.	Because I'm gonna dynamite the train.
997	00:38:42,863	00:38:44,656	What makes you guys so suspicious?	What makes you guys so suspicious?
998	00:38:44,740	00:38:47,909	I better get back to the house and start packing.	I better get back to the house and start packing.
999	00:38:47,993	00:38:50,746	You think I ought to take both my mink coats?	You think I ought to take both my mink coats?
1000	00:38:50,829	00:38:53,373	Darling, no woman should have two mink coats...	Darling, no woman should have two mink coats...
1001	00:38:53,415	00:38:55,917	until every woman in the world has one mink coat.	until every woman in the world has one mink coat.
1002	00:38:56,001	00:38:56,960	Why don't you cut the other one up...	Why don't you cut the other one up...
1003	00:38:57,044	00:38:58,211	and make him a pair of shorts?	and make him a pair of shorts?
1004	00:38:58,253	00:39:00,088	I hear it's freezing there all the time.	I hear it's freezing there all the time.
1005	00:39:00,130	00:39:01,256	Thirty below zero.	Thirty below zero.
1006	00:39:01,298	00:39:02,632	Fascist lies!	Fascist lies!
1007	00:39:02,716	00:39:04,551	You better go home and pack, too, darling.	You better go home and pack, too, darling.
1008	00:39:04,593	00:39:05,927	It will take me no time...	It will take me no time...
1009	00:39:05,969	00:39:09,097	Just my chessboard, my extra shirt, and two hundred books.	Just my chessboard, my extra shirt, and two hundred books.
1010	00:39:09,181	00:39:11,433	Well, as long as Smiley here is going back to East Berlin...	Well, as long as Smiley here is going back to East Berlin...
1011	00:39:11,516	00:39:12,684	I'll get the car for you.	I'll get the car for you.
1012	00:39:12,768	00:39:14,144	Schlemmer, will you run downstairs...	Schlemmer, will you run downstairs...
1013	00:39:14,227	00:39:16,730	and tell Fritz he'll have to take Scarlett home?	and tell Fritz he'll have to take Scarlett home?
1014	00:39:17,439	00:39:18,732	You're letting her go to Moscow?	You're letting her go to Moscow?
1015	00:39:18,815	00:39:19,983	In a pig's eye.	In a pig's eye.
1016	00:39:20,067	00:39:22,402	Now, look. His motorcycle's downstairs.	Now, look. His motorcycle's downstairs.
1017	00:39:22,444	00:39:24,738	Remember that idea you had about the balloon?	Remember that idea you had about the balloon?
1018	00:39:26,948	00:39:28,033	Just think, Liebchen...	Just think, Liebchen...
1019	00:39:28,075	00:39:30,827	tomorrow night, we'll be strolling hand in hand...	tomorrow night, we'll be strolling hand in hand...
1020	00:39:30,911	00:39:32,537	across Red Square.	across Red Square.
1021	00:39:32,579	00:39:33,580	I hope you won't be ashamed of me...	I hope you won't be ashamed of me...
1022	00:39:33,622	00:39:35,165	in front of your friends.	in front of your friends.
1023	00:39:35,248	00:39:36,333	Of course not.	Of course not.
1024	00:39:36,416	00:39:39,127	I promise you, I'll only wear my jewelry at home.	I promise you, I'll only wear my jewelry at home.
1025	00:39:39,211	00:39:41,755	They have assigned us a magnificent apartment...	They have assigned us a magnificent apartment...
1026	00:39:41,797	00:39:43,632	just a short walk from the bathroom.	just a short walk from the bathroom.
1027	00:39:43,715	00:39:44,758	I love you.	I love you.
1028	00:39:44,800	00:39:46,426	I'll make you very happy.	I'll make you very happy.
1029	00:39:46,468	00:39:48,553	Every morning, we'll have breakfast in bed.	Every morning, we'll have breakfast in bed.
1030	00:39:48,595	00:39:49,888	Sounds wonderful.	Sounds wonderful.
1031	00:39:49,930	00:39:51,598	Also lunch, also dinner.	Also lunch, also dinner.
1032	00:39:51,640	00:39:52,849	In bed?	In bed?
1033	00:39:52,933	00:39:54,351	There's no table and no chairs.	There's no table and no chairs.
1034	00:39:54,434	00:39:55,727	Who cares?	Who cares?
1035	00:39:59,064	00:40:00,899	I'll pick you at 6:30 sharp...	I'll pick you at 6:30 sharp...
1036	00:40:00,982	00:40:03,443	because the 7:00 train to Moscow leaves promptly at 8:15.	because the 7:00 train to Moscow leaves promptly at 8:15.
1037	00:40:03,527	00:40:04,444	Wait a minute, kids.	Wait a minute, kids.
1038	00:40:04,528	00:40:06,446	Before you go, I'd like to give you a little present.	Before you go, I'd like to give you a little present.
1039	00:40:06,530	00:40:07,572	Why?	Why?
1040	00:40:07,614	00:40:08,615	It's customary when two people get married.	It's customary when two people get married.
1041	00:40:08,698	00:40:11,618	Otto's friends didn't give us any presents.	Otto's friends didn't give us any presents.
1042	00:40:11,701	00:40:12,911	Instead, they sent the money...	Instead, they sent the money...
1043	00:40:12,994	00:40:15,497	to the unemployed cotton pickers in Mississippi.	to the unemployed cotton pickers in Mississippi.
1044	00:40:15,580	00:40:17,290	Oh. How about a cocktail shaker?	Oh. How about a cocktail shaker?
1045	00:40:17,374	00:40:19,084	No. I guess not.	No. I guess not.
1046	00:40:19,126	00:40:20,293	I know.	I know.
1047	00:40:21,503	00:40:22,754	A cuckoo clock.	A cuckoo clock.
1048	00:40:23,755	00:40:26,883	Handmade by dwarfs in the Black Forest.	Handmade by dwarfs in the Black Forest.
1049	00:40:26,925	00:40:28,927	So now they're exploiting dwarfs.	So now they're exploiting dwarfs.
1050	00:40:29,010	00:40:31,763	I'm sorry I haven't got any fancy wrapping paper.	I'm sorry I haven't got any fancy wrapping paper.
1051	00:40:31,805	00:40:33,890	We do not want anything from you.	We do not want anything from you.
1052	00:40:35,308	00:40:36,268	Otto, don't be rude.	Otto, don't be rude.
1053	00:40:36,351	00:40:38,687	I think it's very sweet of Mr. MacNamara.	I think it's very sweet of Mr. MacNamara.
1054	00:40:38,728	00:40:41,398	Now we'll have a bed and a clock.	Now we'll have a bed and a clock.
1055	00:40:41,440	00:40:43,233	We will get our own clock in Russia.	We will get our own clock in Russia.
1056	00:40:43,275	00:40:45,777	If your clocks don't run any better than your trains...	If your clocks don't run any better than your trains...
1057	00:40:45,861	00:40:47,571	you might as well take this one.	you might as well take this one.
1058	00:40:47,612	00:40:50,031	You laugh at us now, but not for long...	You laugh at us now, but not for long...
1059	00:40:50,073	00:40:53,577	because you're arrogant and fat and bloated.	because you're arrogant and fat and bloated.
1060	00:40:53,618	00:40:56,288	The worms will have a picnic.	The worms will have a picnic.
1061	00:40:56,371	00:40:58,290	See you on the barricades, pal.	See you on the barricades, pal.
1062	00:41:00,250	00:41:02,627	When the day comes, I'll put in a good word for you.	When the day comes, I'll put in a good word for you.
1063	00:41:02,711	00:41:03,753	Scarlett!	Scarlett!
1064	00:41:03,837	00:41:05,505	It's my parents I feel sorry for.	It's my parents I feel sorry for.
1065	00:41:05,589	00:41:07,215	It's too late to save them.	It's too late to save them.
1066	00:41:07,257	00:41:09,676	Otto says they'll have to be liquidated.	Otto says they'll have to be liquidated.
1067	00:41:09,759	00:41:11,136	Bye!	Bye!
1068	00:41:21,980	00:41:23,815	Schlemmer!	Schlemmer!
1069	00:41:23,899	00:41:25,942	Hurry up!	Hurry up!
1070	00:41:37,329	00:41:38,788	Wiedersehen, Liebchen.	Wiedersehen, Liebchen.
1071	00:41:38,872	00:41:40,457	Auf Wiedersehen.	Auf Wiedersehen.
1072	00:42:17,661	00:42:19,579	Good boy, Schlemmer.	Good boy, Schlemmer.
1073	00:42:19,621	00:42:20,580	Yes, sir.	Yes, sir.
1074	00:42:20,622	00:42:22,082	Anything else you wish me to do?	Anything else you wish me to do?
1075	00:42:22,165	00:42:23,083	No, thanks.	No, thanks.
1076	00:42:23,166	00:42:24,251	We can just sit back now...	We can just sit back now...
1077	00:42:24,292	00:42:26,628	and let the East German police finish the job.	and let the East German police finish the job.
1078	00:42:26,711	00:42:27,629	Pardon me.	Pardon me.
1079	00:42:27,712	00:42:30,382	I must be very stupid, but I do not understand any of this.	I must be very stupid, but I do not understand any of this.
1080	00:42:30,423	00:42:31,508	There's nothing to it.	There's nothing to it.
1081	00:42:31,591	00:42:33,426	All it takes is a little knowledge of physics...	All it takes is a little knowledge of physics...
1082	00:42:33,468	00:42:35,345	and elementary psychology.	and elementary psychology.
1083	00:42:35,428	00:42:38,682	Right now, Comrade Otto Ludwig Piffl...	Right now, Comrade Otto Ludwig Piffl...
1084	00:42:38,765	00:42:40,141	is tooling along on his motorcycle...	is tooling along on his motorcycle...
1085	00:42:40,225	00:42:43,603	toward East Berlin, gay, chipper...	toward East Berlin, gay, chipper...
1086	00:42:43,687	00:42:46,106	feeling like a million rubles.	feeling like a million rubles.
1087	00:42:46,189	00:42:49,150	Little does he know that meanwhile back at the exhaust...	Little does he know that meanwhile back at the exhaust...
1088	00:42:49,234	00:42:51,945	the fumes are filling the balloon.	the fumes are filling the balloon.
1089	00:42:52,028	00:42:54,823	It gets bigger and bigger...	It gets bigger and bigger...
1090	00:42:54,906	00:42:57,284	and all the time in the sidecar...	and all the time in the sidecar...
1091	00:42:57,367	00:43:00,328	a little booby trap is ticking away.	a little booby trap is ticking away.
1092	00:43:00,412	00:43:02,914	Now, if my calculations are correct...	Now, if my calculations are correct...
1093	00:43:02,956	00:43:05,083	all these things will begin to pay off...	all these things will begin to pay off...
1094	00:43:05,125	00:43:08,336	once he passes through the Brandenburg Gate.	once he passes through the Brandenburg Gate.
1095	00:45:07,706	00:45:11,084	You can forward my mail care of American Express in Moscow.	You can forward my mail care of American Express in Moscow.
1096	00:45:11,126	00:45:13,420	And "Vogue" magazine and "Screen Romances."	And "Vogue" magazine and "Screen Romances."
1097	00:45:13,461	00:45:16,214	All right, If you promise to send me "Pravda" every day...	All right, If you promise to send me "Pravda" every day...
1098	00:45:16,256	00:45:17,424	just the funnies.	just the funnies.
1099	00:45:17,507	00:45:18,925	He should be here by now.	He should be here by now.
1100	00:45:19,008	00:45:20,510	What time is it?	What time is it?
1101	00:45:20,593	00:45:22,804	6:25. Relax.	6:25. Relax.
1102	00:45:23,972	00:45:25,515	Danke schön, Danke schön.	Danke schön, Danke schön.
1103	00:45:25,598	00:45:26,516	Don't mention it.	Don't mention it.
1104	00:45:26,599	00:45:28,810	Are you sure you want to leave her that coat?	Are you sure you want to leave her that coat?
1105	00:45:28,893	00:45:29,769	Oh, yes.	Oh, yes.
1106	00:45:29,853	00:45:31,646	Otto thinks every woman should have a mink.	Otto thinks every woman should have a mink.
1107	00:45:31,730	00:45:33,231	I'm with Otto.	I'm with Otto.
1108	00:45:33,314	00:45:36,067	Well, maybe she'll let me borrow it on my night out.	Well, maybe she'll let me borrow it on my night out.
1109	00:45:37,569	00:45:41,197	Do you realize that Otto spelled backwards is Otto?	Do you realize that Otto spelled backwards is Otto?
1110	00:45:41,239	00:45:42,323	How about that?	How about that?
1111	00:45:42,407	00:45:43,408	You'll like him.	You'll like him.
1112	00:45:43,491	00:45:46,411	He looks just like Jack Kennedy, only he's younger...	He looks just like Jack Kennedy, only he's younger...
1113	00:45:46,494	00:45:48,413	and he has more upstairs.	and he has more upstairs.
1114	00:45:48,496	00:45:49,414	More brains?	More brains?
1115	00:45:49,497	00:45:50,707	More hair.	More hair.
1116	00:45:50,832	00:45:53,710	And of course, ideologically, he's much sounder.	And of course, ideologically, he's much sounder.
1117	00:45:53,835	00:45:55,587	Maybe we voted for the wrong man.	Maybe we voted for the wrong man.
1118	00:45:55,670	00:45:57,172	That couldn't happen in Russia.	That couldn't happen in Russia.
1119	00:45:57,255	00:45:58,214	They don't make mistakes?	They don't make mistakes?
1120	00:45:58,256	00:45:59,632	They don't vote.	They don't vote.
1121	00:46:01,551	00:46:04,929	Have you ever made love to a revolutionary?	Have you ever made love to a revolutionary?
1122	00:46:05,013	00:46:08,641	No, but I once necked with a Stevenson Democrat.	No, but I once necked with a Stevenson Democrat.
1123	00:46:08,725	00:46:11,978	We'll, I've been engaged four times, so I know about men...	We'll, I've been engaged four times, so I know about men...
1124	00:46:12,061	00:46:14,397	and those subversives, they're the wildest!	and those subversives, they're the wildest!
1125	00:46:14,481	00:46:15,690	- Really? - No contest.	- Really? - No contest.
1126	00:46:15,732	00:46:18,568	And I just thought we were lagging behind in missiles.	And I just thought we were lagging behind in missiles.
1127	00:46:25,366	00:46:27,452	Hiya, girls. Wie gehts? Was ist cooking?	Hiya, girls. Wie gehts? Was ist cooking?
1128	00:46:27,535	00:46:29,329	Bertha, you better take Miss Hazeltine's luggage...	Bertha, you better take Miss Hazeltine's luggage...
1129	00:46:29,412	00:46:30,997	back upstairs.	back upstairs.
1130	00:46:32,832	00:46:34,542	Back upstairs? She's leaving.	Back upstairs? She's leaving.
1131	00:46:34,584	00:46:35,627	I wouldn't count on it.	I wouldn't count on it.
1132	00:46:35,710	00:46:37,086	Bourbon and soda, anyone?	Bourbon and soda, anyone?
1133	00:46:37,754	00:46:39,506	What's he talking about?	What's he talking about?
1134	00:46:39,589	00:46:41,341	Otto's coming to pick me up any minute.	Otto's coming to pick me up any minute.
1135	00:46:41,424	00:46:42,383	Oh, no, he's not.	Oh, no, he's not.
1136	00:46:42,425	00:46:44,969	Otto's been picked up himself by the East German police.	Otto's been picked up himself by the East German police.
1137	00:46:45,053	00:46:46,513	Police? What for?	Police? What for?
1138	00:46:46,596	00:46:47,514	Who knows?	Who knows?
1139	00:46:47,597	00:46:48,515	Over there, they toss people in jail...	Over there, they toss people in jail...
1140	00:46:48,598	00:46:50,141	like we throw away used Kleenex.	like we throw away used Kleenex.
1141	00:46:50,225	00:46:51,142	In jail?	In jail?
1142	00:46:51,226	00:46:52,435	How do you know?	How do you know?
1143	00:46:52,519	00:46:53,561	Bad news travels fast.	Bad news travels fast.
1144	00:46:53,603	00:46:54,562	Say when.	Say when.
1145	00:46:54,604	00:46:56,272	Where is he? I must go to him.	Where is he? I must go to him.
1146	00:46:56,356	00:46:57,273	That's the worst thing you can do.	That's the worst thing you can do.
1147	00:46:57,357	00:46:58,650	He's in trouble enough already.	He's in trouble enough already.
1148	00:46:58,733	00:47:00,777	But he's my husband. I want to help him.	But he's my husband. I want to help him.
1149	00:47:00,860	00:47:01,778	We all do.	We all do.
1150	00:47:01,861	00:47:02,779	That's why we have to get the marriage...	That's why we have to get the marriage...
1151	00:47:02,862	00:47:03,780	annulled right away.	annulled right away.
1152	00:47:03,863	00:47:05,156	Annulled? Now wait a minute, Mac.	Annulled? Now wait a minute, Mac.
1153	00:47:05,240	00:47:06,157	Look.	Look.
1154	00:47:06,241	00:47:08,827	If on top of everything else, they find out he's married...	If on top of everything else, they find out he's married...
1155	00:47:08,910	00:47:11,371	to the parasite daughter of an American capitalist...	to the parasite daughter of an American capitalist...
1156	00:47:11,412	00:47:13,122	they'll send him up for twenty years...	they'll send him up for twenty years...
1157	00:47:13,206	00:47:16,751	slaving away in the salt mines, schlepping those heavy bags...	slaving away in the salt mines, schlepping those heavy bags...
1158	00:47:16,793	00:47:19,712	barefoot through the snow with nothing to keep him warm...	barefoot through the snow with nothing to keep him warm...
1159	00:47:19,754	00:47:21,881	but the hot breath of the Cossacks.	but the hot breath of the Cossacks.
1160	00:47:21,923	00:47:23,174	Otto!	Otto!
1161	00:47:25,426	00:47:26,970	Nice work, Mac.	Nice work, Mac.
1162	00:47:27,512	00:47:29,472	Scarlett. Scarlett!	Scarlett. Scarlett!
1163	00:47:30,807	00:47:32,433	Try some ice.	Try some ice.
1164	00:47:32,475	00:47:34,894	Bertha, call Dr. Bauer, will you?	Bertha, call Dr. Bauer, will you?
1165	00:47:35,895	00:47:37,981	I will call the doctor...	I will call the doctor...
1166	00:47:38,064	00:47:41,234	but I will not give back the mink coat.	but I will not give back the mink coat.
1167	00:47:48,241	00:47:51,286	The temperature, she is normal.	The temperature, she is normal.
1168	00:47:52,620	00:47:54,163	Der pulse...	Der pulse...
1169	00:47:55,415	00:47:56,374	What's the matter, doctor?	What's the matter, doctor?
1170	00:47:56,416	00:47:59,419	I have missed the first act of "The Valkyrie."	I have missed the first act of "The Valkyrie."
1171	00:47:59,502	00:48:02,005	Der pulse is normal.	Der pulse is normal.
1172	00:48:07,927	00:48:10,597	Das ist definitely nicht normal.	Das ist definitely nicht normal.
1173	00:48:11,472	00:48:13,057	I'll fix that.	I'll fix that.
1174	00:48:17,103	00:48:19,063	Cut it out, kids.	Cut it out, kids.
1175	00:48:19,147	00:48:20,315	Scarlett is sick.	Scarlett is sick.
1176	00:48:20,398	00:48:22,567	If she dies, can I have my room back?	If she dies, can I have my room back?
1177	00:48:26,029	00:48:27,739	How would I know? I'm not a lawyer.	How would I know? I'm not a lawyer.
1178	00:48:27,780	00:48:29,032	That's your job.	That's your job.
1179	00:48:30,116	00:48:32,118	What am I paying you for?	What am I paying you for?
1180	00:48:32,201	00:48:34,913	You must have some contacts in East Berlin.	You must have some contacts in East Berlin.
1181	00:48:34,954	00:48:37,415	No! I don't want the marriage just annulled.	No! I don't want the marriage just annulled.
1182	00:48:37,457	00:48:39,208	I want it wiped off the books.	I want it wiped off the books.
1183	00:48:39,250	00:48:40,668	I don't care how you do it.	I don't care how you do it.
1184	00:48:40,752	00:48:42,503	Bribe one of the clerks over there.	Bribe one of the clerks over there.
1185	00:48:42,587	00:48:43,671	Destroy the file.	Destroy the file.
1186	00:48:43,755	00:48:45,840	Look. If you guys could burn down the Reichstag...	Look. If you guys could burn down the Reichstag...
1187	00:48:45,924	00:48:48,301	you can set a match to one measly marriage certificate...	you can set a match to one measly marriage certificate...
1188	00:48:48,384	00:48:50,094	and it has to be done tonight!	and it has to be done tonight!
1189	00:48:51,512	00:48:52,639	Cheers.	Cheers.
1190	00:48:52,722	00:48:54,515	Feeling pretty good, aren't you, mein Führer?	Feeling pretty good, aren't you, mein Führer?
1191	00:48:54,599	00:48:55,516	Not bad.	Not bad.
1192	00:48:55,600	00:48:56,976	You framed that poor boy.	You framed that poor boy.
1193	00:48:57,060	00:48:58,186	You bet I did.	You bet I did.
1194	00:48:58,227	00:48:59,562	I'm not gonna let that Communist kook...	I'm not gonna let that Communist kook...
1195	00:48:59,604	00:49:00,563	ruin somebody's life.	ruin somebody's life.
1196	00:49:00,647	00:49:01,731	But she loves him.	But she loves him.
1197	00:49:01,773	00:49:03,232	Not her life, mine!	Not her life, mine!
1198	00:49:03,316	00:49:05,735	I'm all set for the London job. You want me to blow it?	I'm all set for the London job. You want me to blow it?
1199	00:49:05,818	00:49:06,736	I couldn't care less.	I couldn't care less.
1200	00:49:06,819	00:49:08,404	I'm fed up with this whole deal...	I'm fed up with this whole deal...
1201	00:49:08,446	00:49:09,739	Hopping all around the map...	Hopping all around the map...
1202	00:49:09,781	00:49:11,532	from Baghdad to Caracas to Cape Town...	from Baghdad to Caracas to Cape Town...
1203	00:49:11,574	00:49:13,117	dragging our young behind us.	dragging our young behind us.
1204	00:49:13,201	00:49:14,118	Who needs it?	Who needs it?
1205	00:49:14,202	00:49:15,119	What would you suggest?	What would you suggest?
1206	00:49:15,203	00:49:17,664	Well, why can't you get yourself a nice, permanent job...	Well, why can't you get yourself a nice, permanent job...
1207	00:49:17,747	00:49:19,248	with the home office in Atlanta?	with the home office in Atlanta?
1208	00:49:19,332	00:49:21,334	Atlanta? You can't be serious.	Atlanta? You can't be serious.
1209	00:49:21,417	00:49:23,211	That's Siberia with mint juleps!	That's Siberia with mint juleps!
1210	00:49:23,252	00:49:25,004	Mac, I've had it. I want to go home.	Mac, I've had it. I want to go home.
1211	00:49:25,088	00:49:26,005	Give me one good reason.	Give me one good reason.
1212	00:49:26,089	00:49:27,090	All right.	All right.
1213	00:49:27,173	00:49:28,800	Cindy has to have her teeth straightened.	Cindy has to have her teeth straightened.
1214	00:49:28,883	00:49:29,926	Tommy is ten years old.	Tommy is ten years old.
1215	00:49:30,051	00:49:32,261	He's never had a peanut butter sandwich.	He's never had a peanut butter sandwich.
1216	00:49:32,303	00:49:33,888	And for a change, I'd like to see "Gunsmoke"...	And for a change, I'd like to see "Gunsmoke"...
1217	00:49:33,930	00:49:36,224	not in German or Portuguese or Swahili!	not in German or Portuguese or Swahili!
1218	00:49:36,265	00:49:37,892	You want to go home and pay taxes?	You want to go home and pay taxes?
1219	00:49:37,934	00:49:40,311	We've got it made... Big house, servants...	We've got it made... Big house, servants...
1220	00:49:40,395	00:49:42,230	limousine, fat expense account...	limousine, fat expense account...
1221	00:49:42,313	00:49:43,231	and you want to give all that up...	and you want to give all that up...
1222	00:49:43,314	00:49:44,565	for a peanut butter sandwich?	for a peanut butter sandwich?
1223	00:49:44,607	00:49:45,733	Oh, it's a great life for you.	Oh, it's a great life for you.
1224	00:49:45,817	00:49:47,318	Everywhere we go, you find yourself...	Everywhere we go, you find yourself...
1225	00:49:47,402	00:49:48,444	some friendly secretary...	some friendly secretary...
1226	00:49:48,528	00:49:50,405	who gives language lessons on the side.	who gives language lessons on the side.
1227	00:49:50,446	00:49:51,489	What does that mean?	What does that mean?
1228	00:49:51,572	00:49:53,157	I can always tell when you've got a new teacher.	I can always tell when you've got a new teacher.
1229	00:49:53,241	00:49:55,743	You start wearing your elevator shoes to the office.	You start wearing your elevator shoes to the office.
1230	00:49:55,785	00:49:56,744	Phyllis, are you implying...	Phyllis, are you implying...
1231	00:49:56,828	00:49:57,912	I've known it for years.	I've known it for years.
1232	00:49:57,954	00:49:59,539	And you never said anything to me about it?	And you never said anything to me about it?
1233	00:49:59,580	00:50:00,581	That's not fair!	That's not fair!
1234	00:50:00,623	00:50:03,501	I just didn't want to be one of those nagging American wives...	I just didn't want to be one of those nagging American wives...
1235	00:50:03,584	00:50:04,752	but maybe I was wrong.	but maybe I was wrong.
1236	00:50:04,836	00:50:07,088	Maybe we should have had it out a long time ago.	Maybe we should have had it out a long time ago.
1237	00:50:11,968	00:50:12,969	How is she, doctor?	How is she, doctor?
1238	00:50:13,052	00:50:14,262	Perfectly normal.	Perfectly normal.
1239	00:50:14,345	00:50:16,681	She keeps asking for somebody named Otto.	She keeps asking for somebody named Otto.
1240	00:50:16,764	00:50:18,099	Otto? Never heard of him.	Otto? Never heard of him.
1241	00:50:18,141	00:50:19,558	But she's going to be all right.	But she's going to be all right.
1242	00:50:19,559	00:50:20,893	Hundert prozent.	Hundert prozent.
1243	00:50:20,977	00:50:23,855	You will be happy to know that the young lady is...	You will be happy to know that the young lady is...
1244	00:50:23,896	00:50:26,399	How do you say it in English? Schwanger?	How do you say it in English? Schwanger?
1245	00:50:26,482	00:50:27,400	Schwanger?	Schwanger?
1246	00:50:27,483	00:50:28,401	What's that?	What's that?
1247	00:50:28,484	00:50:29,402	You're the one who's studying German.	You're the one who's studying German.
1248	00:50:29,485	00:50:31,070	Schwanger. You know.	Schwanger. You know.
1249	00:50:31,154	00:50:33,948	Such a dummkopf I am! Schwanger.	Such a dummkopf I am! Schwanger.
1250	00:50:34,032	00:50:35,742	Schwanger, schwanger.	Schwanger, schwanger.
1251	00:50:35,783	00:50:36,909	I know what it means.	I know what it means.
1252	00:50:38,244	00:50:39,203	What?	What?
1253	00:50:39,245	00:50:41,164	You told me not to use words like that.	You told me not to use words like that.
1254	00:50:41,247	00:50:42,582	Come on!	Come on!
1255	00:50:42,665	00:50:44,167	You want me to tell you?	You want me to tell you?
1256	00:50:44,250	00:50:45,209	Please!	Please!
1257	00:50:45,251	00:50:47,545	Scarlett's gonna have puppies.	Scarlett's gonna have puppies.
1258	00:50:49,005	00:50:49,964	What?	What?
1259	00:50:50,006	00:50:50,965	She's pregnant?	She's pregnant?
1260	00:50:51,007	00:50:53,593	That is the word. Pregnant!	That is the word. Pregnant!
1261	00:50:53,634	00:50:54,594	Auf Wiedersehen.	Auf Wiedersehen.
1262	00:50:54,635	00:50:56,220	Schwanger is pregnant.	Schwanger is pregnant.
1263	00:50:56,262	00:50:58,306	Pregnant is schwanger.	Pregnant is schwanger.
1264	00:51:02,727	00:51:05,855	Mother of mercy. Is this the end of Little Rico?	Mother of mercy. Is this the end of Little Rico?
1265	00:51:06,481	00:51:07,982	All right, children, back to your room.	All right, children, back to your room.
1266	00:51:08,066	00:51:09,525	Get ready for bed.	Get ready for bed.
1267	00:51:12,695	00:51:14,739	I wonder what it's like to work for Pepsi Cola.	I wonder what it's like to work for Pepsi Cola.
1268	00:51:14,822	00:51:15,990	Please, Phyllis.	Please, Phyllis.
1269	00:51:16,074	00:51:17,867	So tomorrow, Mr. and Mrs. Hazeltine...	So tomorrow, Mr. and Mrs. Hazeltine...
1270	00:51:17,909	00:51:19,535	will arrive at the airport...	will arrive at the airport...
1271	00:51:19,577	00:51:21,245	and there will be little Scarlett...	and there will be little Scarlett...
1272	00:51:21,329	00:51:25,416	unchanged, unspoiled, unwed, just slightly schwanger.	unchanged, unspoiled, unwed, just slightly schwanger.
1273	00:51:25,500	00:51:26,417	Cheers.	Cheers.
1274	00:51:26,501	00:51:28,336	Phyllis, I'm trying to think!	Phyllis, I'm trying to think!
1275	00:51:28,419	00:51:29,712	Think fast, Mr. Moto...	Think fast, Mr. Moto...
1276	00:51:29,754	00:51:31,589	because there will be a few questions asked...	because there will be a few questions asked...
1277	00:51:31,672	00:51:33,382	like, for instance, who's the father?	like, for instance, who's the father?
1278	00:51:33,424	00:51:35,218	I'll have the answers when the time comes.	I'll have the answers when the time comes.
1279	00:51:35,259	00:51:37,345	You better have Otto when the time comes.	You better have Otto when the time comes.
1280	00:51:37,428	00:51:40,723	Otto? That would be disaster!	Otto? That would be disaster!
1281	00:51:40,765	00:51:42,558	Let me see.	Let me see.
1282	00:51:42,600	00:51:44,811	She was secretly married...	She was secretly married...
1283	00:51:44,894	00:51:47,105	to somebody in the American embassy.	to somebody in the American embassy.
1284	00:51:47,188	00:51:48,356	They were honeymooning in the Alps...	They were honeymooning in the Alps...
1285	00:51:48,397	00:51:50,399	and he was killed by an avalanche.	and he was killed by an avalanche.
1286	00:51:50,483	00:51:52,902	Nah! That's no good.	Nah! That's no good.
1287	00:51:52,985	00:51:55,613	He was sent on a secret mission behind the Iron Curtain...	He was sent on a secret mission behind the Iron Curtain...
1288	00:51:55,696	00:51:56,948	never heard from again!	never heard from again!
1289	00:51:57,031	00:51:58,950	As a matter of fact, the whole thing was so secret...	As a matter of fact, the whole thing was so secret...
1290	00:51:59,033	00:52:00,576	we can't even mention his name.	we can't even mention his name.
1291	00:52:00,660	00:52:02,453	Now you're really running amuck.	Now you're really running amuck.
1292	00:52:02,537	00:52:04,247	You think Scarlett is going to stand still for...	You think Scarlett is going to stand still for...
1293	00:52:04,330	00:52:06,916	Better a dead hero than a live Communist.	Better a dead hero than a live Communist.
1294	00:52:06,999	00:52:07,917	First thing in the morning...	First thing in the morning...
1295	00:52:08,000	00:52:09,502	I'll pick up a distinguished service medal.	I'll pick up a distinguished service medal.
1296	00:52:09,585	00:52:12,255	It was awarded to him posthumously.	It was awarded to him posthumously.
1297	00:52:12,296	00:52:15,299	And while you're at it, pin one on yourself...	And while you're at it, pin one on yourself...
1298	00:52:15,383	00:52:18,636	First-class heel with oak leaf cluster.	First-class heel with oak leaf cluster.
1299	00:52:18,719	00:52:20,388	Well, what do you want me to do?	Well, what do you want me to do?
1300	00:52:20,429	00:52:22,265	I had enough trouble getting the guy into jail.	I had enough trouble getting the guy into jail.
1301	00:52:22,348	00:52:24,600	It's gonna be ten times as tough to get him out!	It's gonna be ten times as tough to get him out!
1302	00:52:37,780	00:52:38,865	Schlemmer!	Schlemmer!
1303	00:52:38,906	00:52:40,533	Don't click your heels.	Don't click your heels.
1304	00:52:40,575	00:52:42,160	Schlemmer, I'm gonna need you tonight.	Schlemmer, I'm gonna need you tonight.
1305	00:52:42,243	00:52:43,369	I'll pick you up in front of your house...	I'll pick you up in front of your house...
1306	00:52:43,411	00:52:44,579	in exactly ten minutes.	in exactly ten minutes.
1307	00:52:44,620	00:52:45,746	Meanwhile, call Ingeborg.	Meanwhile, call Ingeborg.
1308	00:52:45,788	00:52:46,747	Tell her it's an emergency.	Tell her it's an emergency.
1309	00:52:46,831	00:52:48,499	We'll pick her up in exactly twelve minutes.	We'll pick her up in exactly twelve minutes.
1310	00:52:48,583	00:52:49,876	Over and out!	Over and out!
1311	00:53:13,274	00:53:14,233	Wo fahren Sie hin?	Wo fahren Sie hin?
1312	00:53:14,275	00:53:15,234	Ost Berlin.	Ost Berlin.
1313	00:53:15,276	00:53:16,527	- Papiere. - American citizen.	- Papiere. - American citizen.
1314	00:53:16,569	00:53:17,737	What is purpose of your visit?	What is purpose of your visit?
1315	00:53:17,820	00:53:19,405	I'm going to see Commissar Peripetchikoff...	I'm going to see Commissar Peripetchikoff...
1316	00:53:19,488	00:53:20,907	chairman of the Russian Trade Commission.	chairman of the Russian Trade Commission.
1317	00:53:20,990	00:53:21,991	- What for? - On business.	- What for? - On business.
1318	00:53:22,074	00:53:23,409	I represent Coca-Cola.	I represent Coca-Cola.
1319	00:53:23,492	00:53:25,703	Coca-Cola? You have proof?	Coca-Cola? You have proof?
1320	00:53:25,745	00:53:27,121	Will this do?	Will this do?
1321	00:53:29,207	00:53:30,291	I confiscate proof.	I confiscate proof.
1322	00:53:30,374	00:53:31,792	Fair enough. Just return the empties.	Fair enough. Just return the empties.
1323	00:53:31,876	00:53:33,252	OK. Proceed.	OK. Proceed.
1324	00:53:44,305	00:53:47,141	If I may say so, this whole idea is crazy.	If I may say so, this whole idea is crazy.
1325	00:53:47,308	00:53:49,143	It will not work. I can feel it.	It will not work. I can feel it.
1326	00:53:49,310	00:53:50,311	And I'm scared.	And I'm scared.
1327	00:53:50,353	00:53:51,395	Pull yourself together, Schlemmer.	Pull yourself together, Schlemmer.
1328	00:53:51,479	00:53:52,480	- That's an order. - Yes, sir.	- That's an order. - Yes, sir.
1329	00:53:53,189	00:53:56,108	I'm scared, also. Not for myself.	I'm scared, also. Not for myself.
1330	00:53:56,192	00:53:58,736	I only worry something will happen to my new dress.	I only worry something will happen to my new dress.
1331	00:53:58,819	00:54:01,072	I'll buy you a half a dozen dresses.	I'll buy you a half a dozen dresses.
1332	00:54:01,155	00:54:02,531	They're staying at the Grand Hotel Potemkin.	They're staying at the Grand Hotel Potemkin.
1333	00:54:02,573	00:54:03,532	Do you know where that is?	Do you know where that is?
1334	00:54:03,574	00:54:05,868	Yes, sir. It used to be the Great Hotel Göring...	Yes, sir. It used to be the Great Hotel Göring...
1335	00:54:05,910	00:54:08,287	and before that, it was the Great Hotel Bismarck.	and before that, it was the Great Hotel Bismarck.
1336	00:55:19,734	00:55:20,901	Hey!	Hey!
1337	00:55:21,861	00:55:23,487	Gospodin MacNamara.	Gospodin MacNamara.
1338	00:55:23,529	00:55:26,365	If it isn't my old friend Hart, Schaffner, and Karl Marx.	If it isn't my old friend Hart, Schaffner, and Karl Marx.
1339	00:55:26,407	00:55:28,242	I see you bring blond lady with you.	I see you bring blond lady with you.
1340	00:55:28,326	00:55:29,618	Ring a ding ding.	Ring a ding ding.
1341	00:55:29,702	00:55:31,954	Sit down! Sit down, my friends.	Sit down! Sit down, my friends.
1342	00:55:32,038	00:55:33,706	- Join us. - Right here, Fräulein.	- Join us. - Right here, Fräulein.
1343	00:55:33,789	00:55:35,708	I said Karl Marx, not Groucho.	I said Karl Marx, not Groucho.
1344	00:55:35,750	00:55:37,877	To what do we owe this unexpected pleasure?	To what do we owe this unexpected pleasure?
1345	00:55:37,960	00:55:39,920	Well, you're a trade commission. I thought we might trade.	Well, you're a trade commission. I thought we might trade.
1346	00:55:40,004	00:55:40,921	Coca-Cola?	Coca-Cola?
1347	00:55:41,005	00:55:42,089	No, but I hear you boys would like...	No, but I hear you boys would like...
1348	00:55:42,173	00:55:43,758	Fräulein Ingeborg to go to work for you.	Fräulein Ingeborg to go to work for you.
1349	00:55:43,841	00:55:44,925	You want to trade your secretary?	You want to trade your secretary?
1350	00:55:45,009	00:55:46,385	- Right. - For Russian secretary?	- Right. - For Russian secretary?
1351	00:55:46,427	00:55:47,762	- Wrong. - I do not blame you.	- Wrong. - I do not blame you.
1352	00:55:47,845	00:55:50,264	Ours is built like bowlegged samovar.	Ours is built like bowlegged samovar.
1353	00:55:55,519	00:55:57,521	We find proposition very interesting.	We find proposition very interesting.
1354	00:55:57,605	00:55:58,856	Now, what can we offer you?	Now, what can we offer you?
1355	00:55:58,939	00:56:00,858	Actually, all I want from you is a small favor.	Actually, all I want from you is a small favor.
1356	00:56:00,900	00:56:02,693	Small favor, big favor... anything.	Small favor, big favor... anything.
1357	00:56:02,777	00:56:04,070	There's a guy named Otto Ludwig Piffl.	There's a guy named Otto Ludwig Piffl.
1358	00:56:04,153	00:56:05,696	He's being held by the East German police.	He's being held by the East German police.
1359	00:56:05,780	00:56:06,864	For what reason?	For what reason?
1360	00:56:06,947	00:56:08,366	Son of a gun stole my cuckoo clock.	Son of a gun stole my cuckoo clock.
1361	00:56:08,449	00:56:10,826	- You want cuckoo clock back? - Wrong.	- You want cuckoo clock back? - Wrong.
1362	00:56:10,868	00:56:12,036	- You want Piffl back? - Right.	- You want Piffl back? - Right.
1363	00:56:12,119	00:56:13,287	Impossible, my friend.	Impossible, my friend.
1364	00:56:13,371	00:56:14,914	We cannot interfere with internal affairs...	We cannot interfere with internal affairs...
1365	00:56:14,997	00:56:16,957	of Sovereign Republic of East Germany.	of Sovereign Republic of East Germany.
1366	00:56:17,041	00:56:19,001	No Piffl, no deal. Let's go, Ingeborg.	No Piffl, no deal. Let's go, Ingeborg.
1367	00:56:19,043	00:56:22,004	Wait! What is the hurry? You're not giving us a chance.	Wait! What is the hurry? You're not giving us a chance.
1368	00:56:22,046	00:56:23,381	Is old Russian proverb	Is old Russian proverb
1369	00:56:23,464	00:56:25,841	You cannot milk cow with hands in pockets.	You cannot milk cow with hands in pockets.
1370	00:56:25,883	00:56:29,595	Herr Robert! Vodka! Caviar!	Herr Robert! Vodka! Caviar!
1371	00:56:29,678	00:56:31,346	Herr Kapellmeister!	Herr Kapellmeister!
1372	00:56:31,347	00:56:33,557	More rock'n'roll!	More rock'n'roll!
1373	00:56:53,202	00:56:54,370	Hey!	Hey!
1374	00:57:06,382	00:57:08,217	You like this caviar?	You like this caviar?
1375	00:57:08,300	00:57:10,219	We give you a hundred pounds.	We give you a hundred pounds.
1376	00:57:10,261	00:57:11,804	I want Piffl.	I want Piffl.
1377	00:57:43,919	00:57:46,005	Would you take new automobile?	Would you take new automobile?
1378	00:57:46,046	00:57:49,884	1961 Moskvich hardtop convertible... two-toned.	1961 Moskvich hardtop convertible... two-toned.
1379	00:57:49,925	00:57:52,261	You mean that Russian hot rod parked outside?	You mean that Russian hot rod parked outside?
1380	00:57:52,344	00:57:56,265	Is wonderful car. Is exact copy of 1937 Nash.	Is wonderful car. Is exact copy of 1937 Nash.
1381	00:57:56,348	00:57:57,725	Not interested.	Not interested.
1382	00:58:40,643	00:58:42,645	We will give you Chinese cigarettes...	We will give you Chinese cigarettes...
1383	00:58:42,686	00:58:44,438	Armenian rugs...	Armenian rugs...
1384	00:58:44,522	00:58:45,814	Bulgarian yogurt?	Bulgarian yogurt?
1385	00:58:45,856	00:58:47,233	Piffl or nothing.	Piffl or nothing.
1386	00:58:48,734	00:58:49,693	I know what.	I know what.
1387	00:58:49,735	00:58:53,197	We have warehouse full of Spam left over from lend-lease.	We have warehouse full of Spam left over from lend-lease.
1388	00:58:53,280	00:58:55,199	It's 5:00, and we're getting nowhere.	It's 5:00, and we're getting nowhere.
1389	00:58:55,241	00:58:57,535	Ingeborg, put your shoes on.	Ingeborg, put your shoes on.
1390	00:58:57,618	00:59:00,704	One more minute, please. Summit conference!	One more minute, please. Summit conference!
1391	00:59:05,584	00:59:08,128	Before we make deal, we want right of inspection.	Before we make deal, we want right of inspection.
1392	00:59:08,963	00:59:09,880	I veto it.	I veto it.
1393	00:59:09,964	00:59:11,715	I thought so.	I thought so.
1394	00:59:11,799	00:59:13,676	Well, comrades, what are we going to do?	Well, comrades, what are we going to do?
1395	00:59:13,717	00:59:15,135	He's got it, we want it.	He's got it, we want it.
1396	00:59:15,219	00:59:16,220	Are we going to accept...	Are we going to accept...
1397	00:59:16,262	00:59:18,180	his blackmailing capitalistic deal?	his blackmailing capitalistic deal?
1398	00:59:18,222	00:59:19,682	- Let us take a vote. - I vote yes.	- Let us take a vote. - I vote yes.
1399	00:59:20,266	00:59:21,725	Two out of three. Deal is on.	Two out of three. Deal is on.
1400	00:59:21,767	00:59:23,102	Comrades, before we get in trouble...	Comrades, before we get in trouble...
1401	00:59:23,185	00:59:24,520	I must warn you...	I must warn you...
1402	00:59:24,562	00:59:26,564	I'm not really from Soft Drink Secretariat.	I'm not really from Soft Drink Secretariat.
1403	00:59:26,647	00:59:29,316	I'm undercover agent assigned to watch you.	I'm undercover agent assigned to watch you.
1404	00:59:29,358	00:59:31,527	In that case, I vote no. Deal is off.	In that case, I vote no. Deal is off.
1405	00:59:31,569	00:59:32,820	But I vote yes.	But I vote yes.
1406	00:59:32,861	00:59:35,322	Two out of three again! Deal is on.	Two out of three again! Deal is on.
1407	01:00:03,100	01:00:04,560	OK, kids, strip for action.	OK, kids, strip for action.
1408	01:00:06,186	01:00:08,522	It was an itsy-bitsy teeny-weeny.	It was an itsy-bitsy teeny-weeny.
1409	01:00:08,606	01:00:09,898	Yellow polka dot bikini.	Yellow polka dot bikini.
1410	01:00:09,982	01:00:11,066	Nein.	Nein.
1411	01:00:11,150	01:00:13,819	That she wore for the first time today.	That she wore for the first time today.
1412	01:00:13,861	01:00:18,157	An itsy-bitsy teeny-weeny yellow polka dot bikini.	An itsy-bitsy teeny-weeny yellow polka dot bikini.
1413	01:00:18,198	01:00:21,410	So in the locker she wanted to stay.	So in the locker she wanted to stay.
1414	01:00:32,338	01:00:34,006	Nein!	Nein!
1415	01:00:36,300	01:00:37,468	C.I.A.?	C.I.A.?
1416	01:00:48,729	01:00:49,897	Nein.	Nein.
1417	01:00:50,898	01:00:52,066	Nein.	Nein.
1418	01:01:19,343	01:01:20,344	C.I.A...	C.I.A...
1419	01:01:45,577	01:01:46,745	Borodenko.	Borodenko.
1420	01:01:56,672	01:01:58,549	Amerikanischer Spion?	Amerikanischer Spion?
1421	01:01:58,632	01:01:59,925	Moment.	Moment.
1422	01:02:01,051	01:02:01,969	Did you hear that?	Did you hear that?
1423	01:02:02,052	01:02:04,555	He is a confessed American spy.	He is a confessed American spy.
1424	01:02:04,638	01:02:06,140	In that case, I want nothing to do with it...	In that case, I want nothing to do with it...
1425	01:02:06,223	01:02:08,058	because if they ever find out in Moscow...	because if they ever find out in Moscow...
1426	01:02:08,100	01:02:10,185	He's right. No secretary is worth that risk.	He's right. No secretary is worth that risk.
1427	01:02:10,269	01:02:11,186	On the other hand...	On the other hand...
1428	01:02:11,270	01:02:12,271	why should they find out in Moscow?	why should they find out in Moscow?
1429	01:02:12,354	01:02:13,522	I will not inform them.	I will not inform them.
1430	01:02:13,605	01:02:14,773	But if they do find out...	But if they do find out...
1431	01:02:14,857	01:02:16,984	then we just cross the border into West Berlin.	then we just cross the border into West Berlin.
1432	01:02:17,025	01:02:19,236	That is easy for you to say. You are a bachelor.	That is easy for you to say. You are a bachelor.
1433	01:02:19,319	01:02:20,362	But if I defect...	But if I defect...
1434	01:02:20,404	01:02:22,197	you know what they will do to my family?	you know what they will do to my family?
1435	01:02:22,239	01:02:24,450	They will line them up against the wall and shoot them...	They will line them up against the wall and shoot them...
1436	01:02:24,533	01:02:26,076	My wife and my mother-in-law...	My wife and my mother-in-law...
1437	01:02:26,160	01:02:28,036	and my sister-in-law and my brother-in-law.	and my sister-in-law and my brother-in-law.
1438	01:02:29,288	01:02:30,873	Comrades, let's do it.	Comrades, let's do it.
1439	01:02:50,517	01:02:53,145	You tried to bamboozle us. You say he's cuckoo clock thief.	You tried to bamboozle us. You say he's cuckoo clock thief.
1440	01:02:53,187	01:02:55,022	We know he's American spy.	We know he's American spy.
1441	01:02:56,023	01:02:56,940	Shh.	Shh.
1442	01:02:57,024	01:02:59,401	You'd better get him out of here before we all get into trouble.	You'd better get him out of here before we all get into trouble.
1443	01:02:59,485	01:03:00,652	Right.	Right.
1444	01:03:02,905	01:03:05,157	It's a pleasure to do business with you boys.	It's a pleasure to do business with you boys.
1445	01:03:05,199	01:03:08,118	Wait! Where is blond lady?	Wait! Where is blond lady?
1446	01:03:08,202	01:03:09,369	I'll send her right over.	I'll send her right over.
1447	01:03:40,192	01:03:41,860	Oh, you poor baby.	Oh, you poor baby.
1448	01:03:41,902	01:03:44,571	- Did you hurt yourself? - Let me help you.	- Did you hurt yourself? - Let me help you.
1449	01:03:46,240	01:03:48,367	He has bamboozled us again.	He has bamboozled us again.
1450	01:04:11,640	01:04:12,891	Those Russians...	Those Russians...
1451	01:04:12,933	01:04:14,601	I hope they were not too disappointed.	I hope they were not too disappointed.
1452	01:04:14,685	01:04:15,769	That's their problem.	That's their problem.
1453	01:04:15,853	01:04:17,855	Actually, they were very cute.	Actually, they were very cute.
1454	01:04:17,938	01:04:19,606	I can't decide which one I like the best...	I can't decide which one I like the best...
1455	01:04:19,690	01:04:21,942	the big fat one or the bald one.	the big fat one or the bald one.
1456	01:04:22,025	01:04:23,193	That's Schlemmer's problem.	That's Schlemmer's problem.
1457	01:04:33,287	01:04:34,621	Fritz, what's that behind us?	Fritz, what's that behind us?
1458	01:04:36,290	01:04:38,125	Looks like a 1937 Nash.	Looks like a 1937 Nash.
1459	01:04:38,208	01:04:39,376	OK. Step on it.	OK. Step on it.
1460	01:05:48,028	01:05:49,196	Halt!	Halt!
1461	01:05:53,116	01:05:55,452	You remember us. We came through earlier.	You remember us. We came through earlier.
1462	01:05:55,535	01:05:56,703	You wait.	You wait.
1463	01:06:14,054	01:06:15,222	Here is empties.	Here is empties.
1464	01:06:41,164	01:06:42,541	Let's go, Fritz.	Let's go, Fritz.
1465	01:06:59,516	01:07:03,770	Itsy-bitsy teeny-weeny yellow polka dot bikini.	Itsy-bitsy teeny-weeny yellow polka dot bikini.
1466	01:07:06,523	01:07:07,941	Drop dead.	Drop dead.
1467	01:07:25,375	01:07:27,502	That's enough, Ingeborg. Cut it out!	That's enough, Ingeborg. Cut it out!
1468	01:07:27,544	01:07:29,296	Why are you so unfriendly this morning?	Why are you so unfriendly this morning?
1469	01:07:29,379	01:07:31,256	I thought everything was wunderbar.	I thought everything was wunderbar.
1470	01:07:31,339	01:07:32,507	Some wunderbar.	Some wunderbar.
1471	01:07:32,549	01:07:34,468	Can you imagine what's going to happen at noon...	Can you imagine what's going to happen at noon...
1472	01:07:34,551	01:07:36,553	when the Hazeltines step off that plane...	when the Hazeltines step off that plane...
1473	01:07:36,636	01:07:39,473	and get a load of their new son-in-law?	and get a load of their new son-in-law?
1474	01:07:39,556	01:07:40,599	You slob.	You slob.
1475	01:07:40,682	01:07:43,018	And when he opens his big fat red mouth...	And when he opens his big fat red mouth...
1476	01:07:43,060	01:07:44,061	it's good-bye, Charlie.	it's good-bye, Charlie.
1477	01:07:44,144	01:07:45,270	Who is Charlie?	Who is Charlie?
1478	01:07:45,353	01:07:47,230	Charles H. Kaput.	Charles H. Kaput.
1479	01:07:47,314	01:07:48,857	What's keeping Scarlett? I wish she'd get here.	What's keeping Scarlett? I wish she'd get here.
1480	01:07:48,899	01:07:50,317	I wish Schlemmer would get here...	I wish Schlemmer would get here...
1481	01:07:50,358	01:07:52,486	Or anyway, send my dress back.	Or anyway, send my dress back.
1482	01:07:52,527	01:07:53,904	What do you want in this... Cream, sugar?	What do you want in this... Cream, sugar?
1483	01:07:53,987	01:07:54,905	Just a couple of lumps of Benzedrine.	Just a couple of lumps of Benzedrine.
1484	01:07:54,988	01:07:56,782	It's going to be a rough day.	It's going to be a rough day.
1485	01:08:12,547	01:08:14,716	You'd better put something on.	You'd better put something on.
1486	01:08:14,758	01:08:16,343	Your goose pimples are showing.	Your goose pimples are showing.
1487	01:08:17,552	01:08:20,722	Ooh, that's nothing. You should see my sister.	Ooh, that's nothing. You should see my sister.
1488	01:08:29,022	01:08:29,981	Where is he?	Where is he?
1489	01:08:30,023	01:08:30,982	Scarlett...	Scarlett...
1490	01:08:31,024	01:08:33,193	before that maniac wakes up, I've got to talk to you.	before that maniac wakes up, I've got to talk to you.
1491	01:08:33,235	01:08:35,070	There's only one way out of this mess.	There's only one way out of this mess.
1492	01:08:35,153	01:08:37,697	Otto. Otto, darling.	Otto. Otto, darling.
1493	01:08:37,739	01:08:39,658	Otto, it's me... Scarlett.	Otto, it's me... Scarlett.
1494	01:08:39,699	01:08:42,994	Otto. Otto, darling, wake up.	Otto. Otto, darling, wake up.
1495	01:08:43,036	01:08:44,746	- Otto. - Scarlett?	- Otto. - Scarlett?
1496	01:08:44,830	01:08:47,916	Darling, I have something very exciting to tell you.	Darling, I have something very exciting to tell you.
1497	01:08:47,999	01:08:49,334	How did I get here?	How did I get here?
1498	01:08:55,924	01:08:57,884	You!	You!
1499	01:08:57,926	01:08:59,719	I should take that wedding present...	I should take that wedding present...
1500	01:08:59,803	01:09:00,971	and break it over your head.	and break it over your head.
1501	01:09:01,054	01:09:02,973	That's gratitude after all the trouble I went through...	That's gratitude after all the trouble I went through...
1502	01:09:03,056	01:09:04,057	to get you out of jail.	to get you out of jail.
1503	01:09:04,099	01:09:05,350	- You got me into jail! - So we're even.	- You got me into jail! - So we're even.
1504	01:09:05,392	01:09:08,854	You know, yesterday, when you didn't show up, I fainted.	You know, yesterday, when you didn't show up, I fainted.
1505	01:09:08,937	01:09:10,355	It's all his fault.	It's all his fault.
1506	01:09:10,397	01:09:11,481	Well, not entirely.	Well, not entirely.
1507	01:09:11,523	01:09:13,358	Don't you want to hear what the doctor said?	Don't you want to hear what the doctor said?
1508	01:09:13,400	01:09:14,943	Get him some coffee. He's gonna need it.	Get him some coffee. He's gonna need it.
1509	01:09:15,026	01:09:16,069	From you, I don't need anything.	From you, I don't need anything.
1510	01:09:16,153	01:09:17,487	I'm gonna have a baby.	I'm gonna have a baby.
1511	01:09:17,529	01:09:18,488	If my wife wasn't here...	If my wife wasn't here...
1512	01:09:18,530	01:09:19,990	and if she wasn't gonna have a baby...	and if she wasn't gonna have a baby...
1513	01:09:21,032	01:09:23,368	- What? - That's right.	- What? - That's right.
1514	01:09:23,451	01:09:25,453	Liebchen! Oh!	Liebchen! Oh!
1515	01:09:27,956	01:09:29,457	That's just what the world needs...	That's just what the world needs...
1516	01:09:29,541	01:09:31,877	Another bouncing baby Bolshevik.	Another bouncing baby Bolshevik.
1517	01:09:33,211	01:09:35,213	I was so afraid you wouldn't want it.	I was so afraid you wouldn't want it.
1518	01:09:35,297	01:09:36,840	Oh, you little fool. I want dozens!	Oh, you little fool. I want dozens!
1519	01:09:36,882	01:09:38,008	So do I.	So do I.
1520	01:09:38,049	01:09:39,634	So does the Party. They encourage it.	So does the Party. They encourage it.
1521	01:09:39,718	01:09:41,386	We must outproduce the West!	We must outproduce the West!
1522	01:09:41,469	01:09:43,722	I hear they got a new plan now.	I hear they got a new plan now.
1523	01:09:43,763	01:09:45,974	Instead of one woman taking nine months to have a baby...	Instead of one woman taking nine months to have a baby...
1524	01:09:46,016	01:09:47,017	they're gonna put nine women to work on it...	they're gonna put nine women to work on it...
1525	01:09:47,100	01:09:48,018	and do it in one month.	and do it in one month.
1526	01:09:48,101	01:09:49,352	The minute we arrive in Moscow...	The minute we arrive in Moscow...
1527	01:09:49,436	01:09:50,604	we must get on the waiting list...	we must get on the waiting list...
1528	01:09:50,687	01:09:51,855	for the People's Maternity Ward...	for the People's Maternity Ward...
1529	01:09:51,938	01:09:53,481	and the People's Obstetrician.	and the People's Obstetrician.
1530	01:09:53,523	01:09:56,276	No. I'd like to fly over my own doctor from Atlanta...	No. I'd like to fly over my own doctor from Atlanta...
1531	01:09:56,359	01:09:58,195	and my own nurse and my governess.	and my own nurse and my governess.
1532	01:09:58,236	01:09:59,279	What for?	What for?
1533	01:09:59,362	01:10:01,198	The State takes care of everything!	The State takes care of everything!
1534	01:10:01,239	01:10:03,491	At the age of six months, the baby will be enrolled...	At the age of six months, the baby will be enrolled...
1535	01:10:03,533	01:10:05,118	in the People's Nursery School.	in the People's Nursery School.
1536	01:10:05,202	01:10:07,037	Naturally, we will have visiting rights...	Naturally, we will have visiting rights...
1537	01:10:07,120	01:10:08,038	every other Sunday.	every other Sunday.
1538	01:10:08,121	01:10:09,456	Every other Sunday?	Every other Sunday?
1539	01:10:09,539	01:10:12,542	You can bring him some pabulum with a file in it.	You can bring him some pabulum with a file in it.
1540	01:10:12,626	01:10:14,878	Imperialist stooge!	Imperialist stooge!
1541	01:10:15,629	01:10:17,714	And of course, we'll see him on May Day.	And of course, we'll see him on May Day.
1542	01:10:17,797	01:10:19,341	He'll be marching by in the parade.	He'll be marching by in the parade.
1543	01:10:19,382	01:10:21,176	We can wave to him.	We can wave to him.
1544	01:10:21,301	01:10:23,511	You can also wave to him on Lenin's birthday...	You can also wave to him on Lenin's birthday...
1545	01:10:23,553	01:10:25,513	and on Yuri Gagarin's birthday.	and on Yuri Gagarin's birthday.
1546	01:10:25,555	01:10:26,973	That kid will be parading all the time.	That kid will be parading all the time.
1547	01:10:27,057	01:10:29,517	Well, at least it'll keep him off the streets.	Well, at least it'll keep him off the streets.
1548	01:10:29,601	01:10:30,810	The tickets.	The tickets.
1549	01:10:30,852	01:10:32,270	Where are the tickets?	Where are the tickets?
1550	01:10:32,354	01:10:34,272	We must find out when the next train leaves for Moscow.	We must find out when the next train leaves for Moscow.
1551	01:10:34,856	01:10:37,692	Forget it, Piffl. You're not going to Moscow.	Forget it, Piffl. You're not going to Moscow.
1552	01:10:37,776	01:10:39,903	You can't even get back to East Berlin.	You can't even get back to East Berlin.
1553	01:10:39,986	01:10:41,071	Why not?	Why not?
1554	01:10:41,154	01:10:43,198	Because you're an American spy.	Because you're an American spy.
1555	01:10:43,240	01:10:44,449	Who said so?	Who said so?
1556	01:10:44,532	01:10:45,450	You did.	You did.
1557	01:10:45,533	01:10:46,701	Don't you remember last night at the police station?	Don't you remember last night at the police station?
1558	01:10:46,785	01:10:49,913	You signed a confession... An amerikanischer Spion.	You signed a confession... An amerikanischer Spion.
1559	01:10:50,914	01:10:52,082	Nein.	Nein.
1560	01:10:52,666	01:10:53,833	Ja!	Ja!
1561	01:10:54,501	01:10:55,418	Isn't that thrilling?	Isn't that thrilling?
1562	01:10:55,502	01:10:57,671	Darling, why didn't you tell me?	Darling, why didn't you tell me?
1563	01:10:57,712	01:10:58,880	But I'm...	But I'm...
1564	01:10:58,922	01:11:00,548	I'm not a spy! It's not true!	I'm not a spy! It's not true!
1565	01:11:00,590	01:11:01,549	Makes you think, doesn't it...	Makes you think, doesn't it...
1566	01:11:01,633	01:11:03,343	about all those other confessions they get?	about all those other confessions they get?
1567	01:11:03,385	01:11:04,344	Another hour, and they'd have had you...	Another hour, and they'd have had you...
1568	01:11:04,386	01:11:06,972	confessing to germ warfare in Laos.	confessing to germ warfare in Laos.
1569	01:11:07,055	01:11:08,848	You did this to me.	You did this to me.
1570	01:11:08,890	01:11:09,891	You mean I gave you the third degree?	You mean I gave you the third degree?
1571	01:11:09,975	01:11:10,976	Or was it your Communist chums?	Or was it your Communist chums?
1572	01:11:11,017	01:11:11,977	You will come with me.	You will come with me.
1573	01:11:12,018	01:11:12,978	You will tell them it was a trick.	You will tell them it was a trick.
1574	01:11:13,019	01:11:13,979	Are you kidding?	Are you kidding?
1575	01:11:14,020	01:11:16,398	Do you think they'd believe me, an imperialist stooge?	Do you think they'd believe me, an imperialist stooge?
1576	01:11:16,481	01:11:17,565	I shall kill you!	I shall kill you!
1577	01:11:17,649	01:11:19,276	Take it easy, kid, or you'll wind up...	Take it easy, kid, or you'll wind up...
1578	01:11:19,359	01:11:20,986	in the People's Emergency Hospital.	in the People's Emergency Hospital.
1579	01:11:22,904	01:11:26,283	Otto, darling, what are we gonna call the baby?	Otto, darling, what are we gonna call the baby?
1580	01:11:32,455	01:11:36,209	My dress! What did you do to my dress?	My dress! What did you do to my dress?
1581	01:11:36,251	01:11:37,711	Schlemmer.	Schlemmer.
1582	01:11:37,752	01:11:38,712	Yes, sir.	Yes, sir.
1583	01:11:38,753	01:11:40,255	I'm sorry I didn't shave this morning.	I'm sorry I didn't shave this morning.
1584	01:11:40,338	01:11:42,215	Look at my dress. It's ruined.	Look at my dress. It's ruined.
1585	01:11:42,257	01:11:43,717	You have any trouble getting out of East Berlin?	You have any trouble getting out of East Berlin?
1586	01:11:43,800	01:11:45,719	No, but I had a little trouble in West Berlin.	No, but I had a little trouble in West Berlin.
1587	01:11:45,802	01:11:47,595	I was picked up by an American soldier in a Jeep.	I was picked up by an American soldier in a Jeep.
1588	01:11:47,679	01:11:49,222	He was very fresh...	He was very fresh...
1589	01:11:49,264	01:11:51,766	Wanted to take my picture for something called "Playboy"?	Wanted to take my picture for something called "Playboy"?
1590	01:11:51,850	01:11:53,935	Get out of those silly clothes. We've got a lot of work to do.	Get out of those silly clothes. We've got a lot of work to do.
1591	01:11:54,019	01:11:55,770	Yes, sir. If I can have my suit.	Yes, sir. If I can have my suit.
1592	01:11:55,854	01:11:57,022	It's in your office.	It's in your office.
1593	01:12:05,071	01:12:07,532	And it's gonna be such fun shopping.	And it's gonna be such fun shopping.
1594	01:12:07,615	01:12:10,035	We need a bassinet and a crib and a layette...	We need a bassinet and a crib and a layette...
1595	01:12:10,076	01:12:12,620	and we have to run down to Paris for a few days.	and we have to run down to Paris for a few days.
1596	01:12:12,704	01:12:14,706	They have some marvy maternity clothes...	They have some marvy maternity clothes...
1597	01:12:14,748	01:12:15,957	at Christian Dior's.	at Christian Dior's.
1598	01:12:16,041	01:12:17,375	Darling, you have to forget all that.	Darling, you have to forget all that.
1599	01:12:17,459	01:12:19,169	We can't even afford milk for the baby.	We can't even afford milk for the baby.
1600	01:12:19,210	01:12:21,671	Oh, the doctors have a whole new theory.	Oh, the doctors have a whole new theory.
1601	01:12:21,713	01:12:23,548	Milk's the worst thing for babies.	Milk's the worst thing for babies.
1602	01:12:23,631	01:12:25,550	Scarlett, don't you understand?	Scarlett, don't you understand?
1603	01:12:25,633	01:12:28,219	I am through, finished, ausgespielt.	I am through, finished, ausgespielt.
1604	01:12:28,261	01:12:29,637	To the Communists, I'm an American spy.	To the Communists, I'm an American spy.
1605	01:12:29,721	01:12:31,556	To the Americans, I'm a Communist.	To the Americans, I'm a Communist.
1606	01:12:31,598	01:12:34,309	I have nothing... No home, no job...	I have nothing... No home, no job...
1607	01:12:34,351	01:12:36,019	not even my motorcycle.	not even my motorcycle.
1608	01:12:36,102	01:12:38,646	That's tough. All you got is a rich wife.	That's tough. All you got is a rich wife.
1609	01:12:38,688	01:12:41,316	He's right. In January, when I'm eighteen...	He's right. In January, when I'm eighteen...
1610	01:12:41,358	01:12:43,985	Daddy's giving me ten thousand shares of Coca-Cola stock.	Daddy's giving me ten thousand shares of Coca-Cola stock.
1611	01:12:44,027	01:12:46,196	I'm a worker, not a gigolo!	I'm a worker, not a gigolo!
1612	01:12:46,237	01:12:47,697	I will not take any money from you.	I will not take any money from you.
1613	01:12:47,781	01:12:49,032	You bet you won't!	You bet you won't!
1614	01:12:49,074	01:12:50,658	Because when your father finds out who you married...	Because when your father finds out who you married...
1615	01:12:50,700	01:12:53,078	he'll cut you off without a red cent.	he'll cut you off without a red cent.
1616	01:12:53,161	01:12:54,245	You should pardon the expression.	You should pardon the expression.
1617	01:12:54,329	01:12:55,330	I guess so.	I guess so.
1618	01:12:55,413	01:12:57,415	Daddy has a fit every time I order anything...	Daddy has a fit every time I order anything...
1619	01:12:57,499	01:12:58,917	with Russian dressing.	with Russian dressing.
1620	01:12:59,000	01:13:00,210	Looks bad, doesn't it?	Looks bad, doesn't it?
1621	01:13:00,251	01:13:01,211	But it's a good thing I like you kids.	But it's a good thing I like you kids.
1622	01:13:01,252	01:13:02,212	I'm gonna help you...	I'm gonna help you...
1623	01:13:02,253	01:13:03,838	if idiot-boy here will cooperate.	if idiot-boy here will cooperate.
1624	01:13:03,880	01:13:05,339	You go to hell!	You go to hell!
1625	01:13:05,340	01:13:06,925	Long distance.	Long distance.
1626	01:13:07,008	01:13:09,177	Mr. Hazeltine calling from London.	Mr. Hazeltine calling from London.
1627	01:13:10,261	01:13:11,221	London?	London?
1628	01:13:11,262	01:13:13,139	Uh-oh. The bloodhounds are closing in.	Uh-oh. The bloodhounds are closing in.
1629	01:13:14,557	01:13:16,684	Hello? Yes, Mr. Hazeltine. This is MacNamara.	Hello? Yes, Mr. Hazeltine. This is MacNamara.
1630	01:13:16,726	01:13:18,603	MacNamara, I'm gonna have your head for this.	MacNamara, I'm gonna have your head for this.
1631	01:13:19,270	01:13:20,563	What do you mean, for what?	What do you mean, for what?
1632	01:13:20,647	01:13:21,898	We get off at the London airport...	We get off at the London airport...
1633	01:13:21,981	01:13:22,941	to change planes...	to change planes...
1634	01:13:23,024	01:13:24,859	and there's this telegram waiting for me.	and there's this telegram waiting for me.
1635	01:13:24,901	01:13:25,860	"Congratulations."	"Congratulations."
1636	01:13:25,902	01:13:27,612	"You are going to be a grandfather."	"You are going to be a grandfather."
1637	01:13:27,695	01:13:28,947	"Signed, MacNamara."	"Signed, MacNamara."
1638	01:13:29,030	01:13:30,198	Is this your idea of a joke?	Is this your idea of a joke?
1639	01:13:30,698	01:13:32,700	No, it's not my idea of a joke.	No, it's not my idea of a joke.
1640	01:13:32,742	01:13:34,369	Did somebody send a telegram to your father?	Did somebody send a telegram to your father?
1641	01:13:34,452	01:13:36,955	Yes, Mrs. MacNamara.	Yes, Mrs. MacNamara.
1642	01:13:37,038	01:13:38,206	Oh, she did.	Oh, she did.
1643	01:13:39,082	01:13:40,125	Yes, it's true.	Yes, it's true.
1644	01:13:40,208	01:13:41,334	We didn't want you to be too surprised...	We didn't want you to be too surprised...
1645	01:13:41,376	01:13:42,544	when you got here.	when you got here.
1646	01:13:43,711	01:13:46,005	MacNamara, I send you a sweet, pure, innocent girl...	MacNamara, I send you a sweet, pure, innocent girl...
1647	01:13:46,047	01:13:47,465	who isn't even eighteen yet, and...	who isn't even eighteen yet, and...
1648	01:13:48,716	01:13:49,884	What?	What?
1649	01:13:50,718	01:13:52,971	It's all right, Melanie. She's married.	It's all right, Melanie. She's married.
1650	01:13:53,054	01:13:54,222	Oh, thank heaven.	Oh, thank heaven.
1651	01:13:54,305	01:13:56,599	Wait a minute, MacNamara! Not so fast!	Wait a minute, MacNamara! Not so fast!
1652	01:13:56,641	01:13:58,643	Just exactly who is she married to?	Just exactly who is she married to?
1653	01:13:59,644	01:14:01,271	Oh, uh, I wouldn't worry about it.	Oh, uh, I wouldn't worry about it.
1654	01:14:01,354	01:14:04,023	He's a wonderful boy... Handsome, cultured...	He's a wonderful boy... Handsome, cultured...
1655	01:14:04,107	01:14:06,776	comes from one of the best families in Europe.	comes from one of the best families in Europe.
1656	01:14:06,860	01:14:08,361	You'll be crazy about him.	You'll be crazy about him.
1657	01:14:08,445	01:14:10,363	Yes, sir. We'll bring him along to the airport with us.	Yes, sir. We'll bring him along to the airport with us.
1658	01:14:10,405	01:14:11,573	Happy landing.	Happy landing.
1659	01:14:13,032	01:14:14,159	Schlemmer!	Schlemmer!
1660	01:14:14,200	01:14:15,243	What are you up to now?	What are you up to now?
1661	01:14:15,326	01:14:17,704	All those lies. You can't fool Daddy that easy.	All those lies. You can't fool Daddy that easy.
1662	01:14:17,787	01:14:19,122	I didn't say it was gonna be easy...	I didn't say it was gonna be easy...
1663	01:14:19,205	01:14:20,206	but we sure can try.	but we sure can try.
1664	01:14:20,290	01:14:21,332	Try what?	Try what?
1665	01:14:21,374	01:14:24,294	We're gonna turn this crumb bum into a perfect son-in-law...	We're gonna turn this crumb bum into a perfect son-in-law...
1666	01:14:24,377	01:14:26,129	and we've got exactly three hours and two minutes...	and we've got exactly three hours and two minutes...
1667	01:14:26,212	01:14:27,130	to do it in.	to do it in.
1668	01:14:27,213	01:14:29,132	Oh, I get it. Isn't he clever?	Oh, I get it. Isn't he clever?
1669	01:14:29,215	01:14:30,133	Schlemmer!	Schlemmer!
1670	01:14:30,216	01:14:32,218	I categorically refuse!	I categorically refuse!
1671	01:14:32,302	01:14:33,303	Sorry, sir.	Sorry, sir.
1672	01:14:33,386	01:14:34,888	I had difficulty getting out of the girdle.	I had difficulty getting out of the girdle.
1673	01:14:34,971	01:14:36,890	Schlemmer, I want all of those people out there...	Schlemmer, I want all of those people out there...
1674	01:14:36,973	01:14:39,184	to drop everything and stand by for orders.	to drop everything and stand by for orders.
1675	01:14:39,267	01:14:41,269	General alarm, complete mobilization.	General alarm, complete mobilization.
1676	01:14:41,352	01:14:42,562	Ah! Like the good old days.	Ah! Like the good old days.
1677	01:14:42,645	01:14:43,688	Yes, sir.	Yes, sir.
1678	01:14:43,771	01:14:45,899	I will not be a party to this scheme.	I will not be a party to this scheme.
1679	01:14:45,982	01:14:47,150	OK, if you don't love your wife.	OK, if you don't love your wife.
1680	01:14:47,192	01:14:48,359	I worship her!	I worship her!
1681	01:14:48,401	01:14:50,153	You know there's nothing I wouldn't do for you...	You know there's nothing I wouldn't do for you...
1682	01:14:50,195	01:14:52,864	but I will not compromise my principles!	but I will not compromise my principles!
1683	01:14:52,947	01:14:54,449	And I'd do anything for you...	And I'd do anything for you...
1684	01:14:54,532	01:14:56,534	even if we had to starve together...	even if we had to starve together...
1685	01:14:56,618	01:14:59,704	but we can't ask the baby to starve, not at his age!	but we can't ask the baby to starve, not at his age!
1686	01:14:59,787	01:15:00,705	See, you're upsetting your wife.	See, you're upsetting your wife.
1687	01:15:00,788	01:15:01,706	Think of her condition.	Think of her condition.
1688	01:15:01,789	01:15:04,292	I will not be turned into a capitalist!	I will not be turned into a capitalist!
1689	01:15:04,375	01:15:06,336	Once you are a son-in-law in good standing...	Once you are a son-in-law in good standing...
1690	01:15:06,377	01:15:07,545	I don't care what you do.	I don't care what you do.
1691	01:15:07,587	01:15:09,422	You can steal the formula to Coca-Cola...	You can steal the formula to Coca-Cola...
1692	01:15:09,464	01:15:11,090	and square yourself with Moscow.	and square yourself with Moscow.
1693	01:15:11,174	01:15:12,217	But at noon today...	But at noon today...
1694	01:15:12,300	01:15:15,261	you are going to look and act like a gentleman!	you are going to look and act like a gentleman!
1695	01:15:20,350	01:15:22,393	Everybody at their posts awaiting orders.	Everybody at their posts awaiting orders.
1696	01:15:23,353	01:15:24,270	All right. Here we go.	All right. Here we go.
1697	01:15:24,354	01:15:25,688	First, get a barber and a manicurist...	First, get a barber and a manicurist...
1698	01:15:25,772	01:15:26,689	up to the office.	up to the office.
1699	01:15:26,773	01:15:28,691	Next, call my lawyer. I want him here immediately.	Next, call my lawyer. I want him here immediately.
1700	01:15:28,775	01:15:29,692	Next, I want to speak to the manager...	Next, I want to speak to the manager...
1701	01:15:29,776	01:15:30,693	of the Berlin Hilton.	of the Berlin Hilton.
1702	01:15:30,777	01:15:31,861	Next, get ahold of what's-his-name...	Next, get ahold of what's-his-name...
1703	01:15:31,903	01:15:32,862	You know, that moth-eaten count...	You know, that moth-eaten count...
1704	01:15:32,904	01:15:34,864	the one that used to hang around at the Cafe Wien.	the one that used to hang around at the Cafe Wien.
1705	01:15:34,948	01:15:35,865	Count von Droste-Schattenburg?	Count von Droste-Schattenburg?
1706	01:15:35,949	01:15:37,867	That's the one. I want to see him right away.	That's the one. I want to see him right away.
1707	01:15:37,951	01:15:38,993	Yes, sir.	Yes, sir.
1708	01:15:39,035	01:15:40,036	And send Ingeborg in here with pad and pencil.	And send Ingeborg in here with pad and pencil.
1709	01:15:40,119	01:15:42,372	- Yes, sir. - Schnellmachen. 1, 2, 3!	- Yes, sir. - Schnellmachen. 1, 2, 3!
1710	01:15:43,164	01:15:44,499	- Ja! - All right.	- Ja! - All right.
1711	01:15:44,624	01:15:46,209	Next, we'd better start cleaning him up.	Next, we'd better start cleaning him up.
1712	01:15:46,292	01:15:48,211	- Over there. - I've agreed to nothing!	- Over there. - I've agreed to nothing!
1713	01:15:48,294	01:15:50,922	Is it against the party line to use indoor plumbing?	Is it against the party line to use indoor plumbing?
1714	01:15:51,005	01:15:53,174	Come on, darling. It won't hurt a bit.	Come on, darling. It won't hurt a bit.
1715	01:15:53,216	01:15:56,052	Even if it hurts, mit the hot water mit the soap.	Even if it hurts, mit the hot water mit the soap.
1716	01:15:58,513	01:16:00,348	- Yes, Mr. MacNamara. - Ready?	- Yes, Mr. MacNamara. - Ready?
1717	01:16:00,390	01:16:01,516	Always ready.	Always ready.
1718	01:16:02,517	01:16:03,643	First, call...	First, call...
1719	01:16:03,685	01:16:05,687	Reinhardt and Reinhardt custom tailors...	Reinhardt and Reinhardt custom tailors...
1720	01:16:05,770	01:16:06,854	and have them send up everything they've got in their shop...	and have them send up everything they've got in their shop...
1721	01:16:06,896	01:16:09,190	Single-breasted, three-buttoned, narrow lapels,	Single-breasted, three-buttoned, narrow lapels,
1722	01:16:09,274	01:16:12,277	medium-gray to dark blue, size... uh, thirty-nine regular.	medium-gray to dark blue, size... uh, thirty-nine regular.
1723	01:16:12,360	01:16:14,279	Next, call Pleschke the haberdasher.	Next, call Pleschke the haberdasher.
1724	01:16:14,362	01:16:15,321	I want to see some shirts.	I want to see some shirts.
1725	01:16:15,363	01:16:16,698	Broadcloth, plain or tab collar...	Broadcloth, plain or tab collar...
1726	01:16:16,781	01:16:18,575	size... 15 1/2, 34.	size... 15 1/2, 34.
1727	01:16:18,658	01:16:20,702	Shorts... nylon or cotton, size thirty-two.	Shorts... nylon or cotton, size thirty-two.
1728	01:16:20,743	01:16:23,037	Socks... French lisle, dark-toned, size 11 1/2.	Socks... French lisle, dark-toned, size 11 1/2.
1729	01:16:23,121	01:16:25,456	Ties... not too wide, not too narrow, not too fancy.	Ties... not too wide, not too narrow, not too fancy.
1730	01:16:25,540	01:16:26,541	Also, pajamas, handkerchiefs...	Also, pajamas, handkerchiefs...
1731	01:16:26,624	01:16:28,793	cuff links, suspenders, et cetera, et cetera.	cuff links, suspenders, et cetera, et cetera.
1732	01:16:28,876	01:16:29,794	Next, call Hochstaetter's.	Next, call Hochstaetter's.
1733	01:16:29,877	01:16:32,338	Have them deliver some shoes... British or Italian models...	Have them deliver some shoes... British or Italian models...
1734	01:16:32,380	01:16:33,673	brown and black, size 9B.	brown and black, size 9B.
1735	01:16:35,383	01:16:36,384	Yes, Fritz.	Yes, Fritz.
1736	01:16:36,467	01:16:37,677	No, Fritz. I need you.	No, Fritz. I need you.
1737	01:16:37,719	01:16:40,388	Sleepy or not sleepy, everybody works today.	Sleepy or not sleepy, everybody works today.
1738	01:16:40,430	01:16:42,432	Next, call any first-class hatter.	Next, call any first-class hatter.
1739	01:16:42,515	01:16:43,683	I want an assortment of hats...	I want an assortment of hats...
1740	01:16:43,725	01:16:46,853	No porkpies, none of that Tyrolean jazz, size 7 3/8.	No porkpies, none of that Tyrolean jazz, size 7 3/8.
1741	01:16:46,936	01:16:50,273	Uh, correction... After we cut his hair, 7 1/8.	Uh, correction... After we cut his hair, 7 1/8.
1742	01:16:50,356	01:16:52,525	Next, call that department store on Tauenzienstrasse.	Next, call that department store on Tauenzienstrasse.
1743	01:16:52,567	01:16:54,360	Have them bring up a matched set of men's luggage...	Have them bring up a matched set of men's luggage...
1744	01:16:54,444	01:16:55,361	cowhide or pigskin.	cowhide or pigskin.
1745	01:16:55,445	01:16:57,030	Next, call the Ritz jewelers.	Next, call the Ritz jewelers.
1746	01:16:57,071	01:16:58,448	I want to see a selection of gold wedding rings.	I want to see a selection of gold wedding rings.
1747	01:16:58,531	01:17:00,575	Also, engagement rings... Diamond solitaire...	Also, engagement rings... Diamond solitaire...
1748	01:17:00,658	01:17:02,410	no less than two carats, no more than four.	no less than two carats, no more than four.
1749	01:17:02,493	01:17:04,662	Make sure he scrubs behind his ears.	Make sure he scrubs behind his ears.
1750	01:17:04,704	01:17:05,913	Next, call Kottler's Restaurant.	Next, call Kottler's Restaurant.
1751	01:17:05,997	01:17:08,082	Have them send up one deluxe seven-course dinner...	Have them send up one deluxe seven-course dinner...
1752	01:17:08,166	01:17:09,208	and one complete table setting.	and one complete table setting.
1753	01:17:09,250	01:17:10,877	Next, call a florist, and have them make up...	Next, call a florist, and have them make up...
1754	01:17:10,918	01:17:12,211	a bouquet of chrysanthemums.	a bouquet of chrysanthemums.
1755	01:17:12,295	01:17:13,796	Also, two boutonnieres... White carnations.	Also, two boutonnieres... White carnations.
1756	01:17:13,880	01:17:15,381	Any questions?	Any questions?
1757	01:17:15,465	01:17:18,217	Yes. Can I go home and get some clothes?	Yes. Can I go home and get some clothes?
1758	01:17:18,259	01:17:19,802	At a time like this?	At a time like this?
1759	01:17:19,886	01:17:21,554	Dressed or not dressed, everybody works today.	Dressed or not dressed, everybody works today.
1760	01:17:21,596	01:17:22,930	Now get with it.	Now get with it.
1761	01:17:23,014	01:17:23,931	Haarschnitt.	Haarschnitt.
1762	01:17:24,015	01:17:25,224	- Manicure? - Not me... him.	- Manicure? - Not me... him.
1763	01:17:25,308	01:17:26,476	Take him into the conference room...	Take him into the conference room...
1764	01:17:26,517	01:17:27,477	and chop that mop off.	and chop that mop off.
1765	01:17:27,518	01:17:28,478	Jawohl.	Jawohl.
1766	01:17:28,519	01:17:29,479	And give him a shave and a manicure.	And give him a shave and a manicure.
1767	01:17:29,520	01:17:30,480	Jawohl.	Jawohl.
1768	01:17:30,521	01:17:32,482	- No! - What do you mean, no?	- No! - What do you mean, no?
1769	01:17:32,523	01:17:33,691	No manicure.	No manicure.
1770	01:17:33,775	01:17:36,402	It's a symbol of bourgeois decadence and insecurity.	It's a symbol of bourgeois decadence and insecurity.
1771	01:17:36,486	01:17:38,112	Oh, sure. In Russia, everybody is so secure...	Oh, sure. In Russia, everybody is so secure...
1772	01:17:38,196	01:17:39,405	they chew their nails off.	they chew their nails off.
1773	01:17:39,489	01:17:41,449	Come on, darling. Nobody will ever know.	Come on, darling. Nobody will ever know.
1774	01:17:41,532	01:17:42,450	You can wear gloves.	You can wear gloves.
1775	01:17:42,533	01:17:43,451	Gloves?	Gloves?
1776	01:17:43,534	01:17:45,870	Why don't you ask me to wear striped pants?	Why don't you ask me to wear striped pants?
1777	01:17:49,499	01:17:51,376	Ingeborg, when you talk to that tailor...	Ingeborg, when you talk to that tailor...
1778	01:17:51,417	01:17:52,794	I also want some striped pants...	I also want some striped pants...
1779	01:17:52,877	01:17:54,462	a morning coat, and a white waistcoat.	a morning coat, and a white waistcoat.
1780	01:17:56,381	01:17:58,383	I have located Count von Droste-Schattenburg.	I have located Count von Droste-Schattenburg.
1781	01:17:58,466	01:17:59,384	Good!	Good!
1782	01:17:59,467	01:18:01,427	He's working the men's room at the Kempinski Hotel.	He's working the men's room at the Kempinski Hotel.
1783	01:18:01,511	01:18:02,428	How soon can he get here?	How soon can he get here?
1784	01:18:02,512	01:18:03,888	Well, this is his busy time of the day.	Well, this is his busy time of the day.
1785	01:18:03,971	01:18:05,098	He wants to know if you can come there.	He wants to know if you can come there.
1786	01:18:05,181	01:18:06,099	Absolutely not.	Absolutely not.
1787	01:18:06,182	01:18:07,600	I'll tell him. And your lawyer is here.	I'll tell him. And your lawyer is here.
1788	01:18:07,684	01:18:09,018	Come in!	Come in!
1789	01:18:10,019	01:18:12,647	Ah, Herr MacNamara, isn't this a glorious day?	Ah, Herr MacNamara, isn't this a glorious day?
1790	01:18:12,689	01:18:14,357	Cut the schmooze. Now, listen, Zeidlitz.	Cut the schmooze. Now, listen, Zeidlitz.
1791	01:18:14,440	01:18:15,483	Here's what I want you to do.	Here's what I want you to do.
1792	01:18:15,525	01:18:18,027	It has already been done. Complete success.	It has already been done. Complete success.
1793	01:18:18,069	01:18:20,363	The young lady can consider herself unmarried.	The young lady can consider herself unmarried.
1794	01:18:20,446	01:18:21,364	Unmarried?	Unmarried?
1795	01:18:21,447	01:18:22,532	It wasn't easy...	It wasn't easy...
1796	01:18:22,573	01:18:24,325	but I managed to liberate that marriage license...	but I managed to liberate that marriage license...
1797	01:18:24,367	01:18:26,869	from the files in East Berlin just like you ordered.	from the files in East Berlin just like you ordered.
1798	01:18:26,911	01:18:28,663	It's that damned German efficiency.	It's that damned German efficiency.
1799	01:18:28,746	01:18:30,039	That's all I need now...	That's all I need now...
1800	01:18:30,123	01:18:31,624	An illegitimate baby on my hands.	An illegitimate baby on my hands.
1801	01:18:31,666	01:18:32,625	I beg your pardon.	I beg your pardon.
1802	01:18:32,667	01:18:33,626	He's bringing the shoes.	He's bringing the shoes.
1803	01:18:33,668	01:18:35,628	Shoes? Unpack them. Let's see what you've got.	Shoes? Unpack them. Let's see what you've got.
1804	01:18:35,670	01:18:37,672	I want you to go back to East Berlin...	I want you to go back to East Berlin...
1805	01:18:37,755	01:18:40,341	and put that marriage license right back in the file.	and put that marriage license right back in the file.
1806	01:18:40,383	01:18:41,384	If you say so.	If you say so.
1807	01:18:41,467	01:18:42,927	But first, I want you to draw up some adoption papers.	But first, I want you to draw up some adoption papers.
1808	01:18:43,010	01:18:45,388	- For the baby? - No, for Otto Ludwig Piffl.	- For the baby? - No, for Otto Ludwig Piffl.
1809	01:18:45,471	01:18:46,389	We're going to have him adopted...	We're going to have him adopted...
1810	01:18:46,472	01:18:48,599	by a real honest-to-goodness, blue-blooded aristocrat.	by a real honest-to-goodness, blue-blooded aristocrat.
1811	01:18:48,683	01:18:50,101	- Oh, a baron. - Better than that.	- Oh, a baron. - Better than that.
1812	01:18:50,184	01:18:51,310	The guy who is working in the men's room...	The guy who is working in the men's room...
1813	01:18:51,352	01:18:52,311	at the Kempinski.	at the Kempinski.
1814	01:18:52,353	01:18:53,312	- Who? - Leave the name blank.	- Who? - Leave the name blank.
1815	01:18:53,354	01:18:56,190	I haven't made the deal yet. Now get to work. In there.	I haven't made the deal yet. Now get to work. In there.
1816	01:18:56,232	01:18:59,026	Next, shoes. No, no. Nothing with tassels.	Next, shoes. No, no. Nothing with tassels.
1817	01:18:59,110	01:19:00,153	Those are all right.	Those are all right.
1818	01:19:00,194	01:19:02,071	Alligator? That's for bandleaders.	Alligator? That's for bandleaders.
1819	01:19:02,155	01:19:03,698	Those are OK. OK.	Those are OK. OK.
1820	01:19:05,366	01:19:07,201	Totally unacceptable. Full of holes.	Totally unacceptable. Full of holes.
1821	01:19:07,243	01:19:08,411	Guten Morgen.	Guten Morgen.
1822	01:19:08,494	01:19:09,954	Reinhardt from Reinhardt and Reinhardt.	Reinhardt from Reinhardt and Reinhardt.
1823	01:19:10,037	01:19:10,955	Be right with you.	Be right with you.
1824	01:19:11,038	01:19:12,957	I'll take those and those but not those.	I'll take those and those but not those.
1825	01:19:13,040	01:19:14,041	Now, what have we got here?	Now, what have we got here?
1826	01:19:14,083	01:19:15,877	Latest English styles. All fabrics imported.	Latest English styles. All fabrics imported.
1827	01:19:15,918	01:19:17,420	They look more like they were deported.	They look more like they were deported.
1828	01:19:17,503	01:19:19,046	Too loud. Too quiet. All right...	Too loud. Too quiet. All right...
1829	01:19:19,088	01:19:20,882	but take the padding out of the shoulders.	but take the padding out of the shoulders.
1830	01:19:20,965	01:19:23,593	That's not bad. Belt on the back?	That's not bad. Belt on the back?
1831	01:19:23,676	01:19:24,719	I thought that went out with high-buttoned shoes.	I thought that went out with high-buttoned shoes.
1832	01:19:24,802	01:19:26,721	High-buttoned shoes? I have some right here.	High-buttoned shoes? I have some right here.
1833	01:19:26,804	01:19:27,722	Never mind. Take that stuff...	Never mind. Take that stuff...
1834	01:19:27,805	01:19:28,723	into the conference room.	into the conference room.
1835	01:19:28,806	01:19:29,682	I want these ready in twenty-four hours.	I want these ready in twenty-four hours.
1836	01:19:29,807	01:19:30,767	Twenty-four hours?	Twenty-four hours?
1837	01:19:30,850	01:19:31,768	Where's the morning coat and striped pants?	Where's the morning coat and striped pants?
1838	01:19:31,851	01:19:32,810	My assistant is bringing them.	My assistant is bringing them.
1839	01:19:32,852	01:19:34,103	Those I want fitted right away.	Those I want fitted right away.
1840	01:19:34,187	01:19:36,314	- Schmuck. - What did you say?	- Schmuck. - What did you say?
1841	01:19:36,355	01:19:38,232	Schmuck. Jewelry.	Schmuck. Jewelry.
1842	01:19:38,316	01:19:40,359	Oh. Come with me. You, too.	Oh. Come with me. You, too.
1843	01:19:44,781	01:19:45,865	Sitzen machen.	Sitzen machen.
1844	01:19:45,948	01:19:48,659	A strong, healthy girl like you, you should not be cutting nails.	A strong, healthy girl like you, you should not be cutting nails.
1845	01:19:48,701	01:19:50,620	You should be cutting wheat in the Ukraine.	You should be cutting wheat in the Ukraine.
1846	01:19:50,703	01:19:51,829	No, no. Leave it a little longer...	No, no. Leave it a little longer...
1847	01:19:51,871	01:19:53,581	on the sides, like Sal Mineo.	on the sides, like Sal Mineo.
1848	01:19:53,664	01:19:54,624	Pick a couple of wedding rings.	Pick a couple of wedding rings.
1849	01:19:54,707	01:19:56,167	Left foot, please.	Left foot, please.
1850	01:19:56,209	01:19:57,293	Do you like these?	Do you like these?
1851	01:19:57,376	01:19:58,419	Gold? Never.	Gold? Never.
1852	01:19:58,503	01:20:00,546	I prefer the honest steel of the guns of Stalingrad.	I prefer the honest steel of the guns of Stalingrad.
1853	01:20:00,630	01:20:02,590	Come on. You guys are always yakking about disarmament.	Come on. You guys are always yakking about disarmament.
1854	01:20:02,673	01:20:04,383	We might as well start right here and now.	We might as well start right here and now.
1855	01:20:04,467	01:20:05,426	Stand up, please.	Stand up, please.
1856	01:20:05,510	01:20:06,427	He's also giving you an engagement ring.	He's also giving you an engagement ring.
1857	01:20:06,511	01:20:07,428	- He is? - I am?	- He is? - I am?
1858	01:20:07,512	01:20:09,222	They're too big.	They're too big.
1859	01:20:09,263	01:20:11,348	I assume the gentleman will wear socks.	I assume the gentleman will wear socks.
1860	01:20:11,349	01:20:12,350	Not if I can help it.	Not if I can help it.
1861	01:20:12,433	01:20:14,477	Waist thirty-one. Sit down, please.	Waist thirty-one. Sit down, please.
1862	01:20:14,519	01:20:15,478	I want this one.	I want this one.
1863	01:20:15,520	01:20:16,854	How much? Eight thousand marks.	How much? Eight thousand marks.
1864	01:20:16,896	01:20:17,855	Thank you, darling.	Thank you, darling.
1865	01:20:17,897	01:20:19,899	Wait! Who's paying for this foolishness?	Wait! Who's paying for this foolishness?
1866	01:20:19,982	01:20:21,984	Relax. You've got assets... All that Coca-Cola stock.	Relax. You've got assets... All that Coca-Cola stock.
1867	01:20:22,026	01:20:23,027	You expect me to sit on my assets...	You expect me to sit on my assets...
1868	01:20:23,069	01:20:24,028	and just clip coupons?	and just clip coupons?
1869	01:20:24,111	01:20:26,072	Don't worry. The baby will clip the coupons.	Don't worry. The baby will clip the coupons.
1870	01:20:26,155	01:20:27,156	We'll put all the money in his name.	We'll put all the money in his name.
1871	01:20:27,198	01:20:28,199	Sit down, please.	Sit down, please.
1872	01:20:28,241	01:20:30,660	I will not have my son grow up to be a capitalist!	I will not have my son grow up to be a capitalist!
1873	01:20:30,701	01:20:32,411	When he's eighteen, he can decide for himself...	When he's eighteen, he can decide for himself...
1874	01:20:32,495	01:20:33,746	whether he wants to be a capitalist...	whether he wants to be a capitalist...
1875	01:20:33,788	01:20:35,373	or a rich Communist.	or a rich Communist.
1876	01:20:39,126	01:20:41,712	Yes? Who? The manager of the Berlin Hilton?	Yes? Who? The manager of the Berlin Hilton?
1877	01:20:41,796	01:20:43,047	Put him on.	Put him on.
1878	01:20:43,089	01:20:44,048	Over there.	Over there.
1879	01:20:44,131	01:20:46,300	Hello? I want to reserve the bridal suite.	Hello? I want to reserve the bridal suite.
1880	01:20:46,384	01:20:48,177	Yes, checking in today.	Yes, checking in today.
1881	01:20:48,219	01:20:50,429	I didn't ask you how much it cost.	I didn't ask you how much it cost.
1882	01:20:50,513	01:20:52,515	This is for the son-in-law of an American millionaire.	This is for the son-in-law of an American millionaire.
1883	01:20:52,598	01:20:53,808	Double bed, naturally. Silk sheets.	Double bed, naturally. Silk sheets.
1884	01:20:53,850	01:20:56,519	Tell them we don't need a table and chairs.	Tell them we don't need a table and chairs.
1885	01:20:56,561	01:20:58,521	We're going to have all our meals in bed.	We're going to have all our meals in bed.
1886	01:20:58,604	01:20:59,730	Never mind the silk sheets.	Never mind the silk sheets.
1887	01:20:59,814	01:21:02,316	Just make it a tablecloth and two napkins.	Just make it a tablecloth and two napkins.
1888	01:21:03,276	01:21:06,028	Silk sheets, diamond rings, bridal suites.	Silk sheets, diamond rings, bridal suites.
1889	01:21:06,070	01:21:08,614	What is this, "La Dolce Vita"?	What is this, "La Dolce Vita"?
1890	01:21:08,698	01:21:10,575	Hey! What are you doing?	Hey! What are you doing?
1891	01:21:10,658	01:21:11,784	Stop it! Are you crazy?	Stop it! Are you crazy?
1892	01:21:11,868	01:21:13,744	The haberdasher's in your office.	The haberdasher's in your office.
1893	01:21:13,828	01:21:16,038	Keep an eye on the Kremlin Kid.	Keep an eye on the Kremlin Kid.
1894	01:21:16,956	01:21:19,833	There's a newspaperman here to see you from the "Tageblatt."	There's a newspaperman here to see you from the "Tageblatt."
1895	01:21:19,834	01:21:21,627	Not today.	Not today.
1896	01:21:22,837	01:21:24,714	Sitzen machen.	Sitzen machen.
1897	01:21:24,755	01:21:26,716	No, no. White shirts only. Two dozen. French cuff.	No, no. White shirts only. Two dozen. French cuff.
1898	01:21:26,799	01:21:27,717	Jawohl.	Jawohl.
1899	01:21:27,800	01:21:29,010	Handkerchiefs, OK. Socks, fine.	Handkerchiefs, OK. Socks, fine.
1900	01:21:29,051	01:21:30,970	If he objects, we'll just have to paint his feet black.	If he objects, we'll just have to paint his feet black.
1901	01:21:31,053	01:21:31,971	- Jawohl. - Where are the pajamas?	- Jawohl. - Where are the pajamas?
1902	01:21:32,054	01:21:32,972	Right here.	Right here.
1903	01:21:33,055	01:21:34,015	OK. OK. What's this?	OK. OK. What's this?
1904	01:21:34,056	01:21:34,974	They're beautiful.	They're beautiful.
1905	01:21:35,057	01:21:36,976	- They are terrible. - They are terrible.	- They are terrible. - They are terrible.
1906	01:21:37,018	01:21:38,978	Let's see the ties. Jawohl, nix, jawohl, jawohl...	Let's see the ties. Jawohl, nix, jawohl, jawohl...
1907	01:21:39,020	01:21:40,688	definitely nix. This is the best.	definitely nix. This is the best.
1908	01:21:40,771	01:21:41,689	It is mine.	It is mine.
1909	01:21:41,772	01:21:43,024	Take it off. I'm buying it.	Take it off. I'm buying it.
1910	01:21:43,065	01:21:44,150	Good morning, Phyllis.	Good morning, Phyllis.
1911	01:21:44,191	01:21:46,027	Looks like the Berlin branch of Macy's Basement.	Looks like the Berlin branch of Macy's Basement.
1912	01:21:46,110	01:21:48,321	You have no idea. It's a rat race around here.	You have no idea. It's a rat race around here.
1913	01:21:48,362	01:21:49,322	And I know the rat.	And I know the rat.
1914	01:21:49,363	01:21:50,823	This robe, it is jawohl or nix?	This robe, it is jawohl or nix?
1915	01:21:50,865	01:21:52,366	Sit down, Phyllis. I'll be right with you.	Sit down, Phyllis. I'll be right with you.
1916	01:21:52,408	01:21:53,367	Don't bother.	Don't bother.
1917	01:21:53,409	01:21:55,119	I just want something from the safe.	I just want something from the safe.
1918	01:21:56,621	01:21:59,540	- What's the combination? - 22-5-17.	- What's the combination? - 22-5-17.
1919	01:22:00,416	01:22:01,542	All right. Throw that robe in...	All right. Throw that robe in...
1920	01:22:01,584	01:22:03,377	and start taking this stuff into the conference room.	and start taking this stuff into the conference room.
1921	01:22:03,461	01:22:04,712	- Jawohl. - That guy in there...	- Jawohl. - That guy in there...
1922	01:22:04,795	01:22:06,255	don't tell him those are French cuffs...	don't tell him those are French cuffs...
1923	01:22:06,339	01:22:08,549	not with the Algerian situation the way it is.	not with the Algerian situation the way it is.
1924	01:22:09,216	01:22:10,551	What are you looking for?	What are you looking for?
1925	01:22:11,093	01:22:12,219	Here they are. The passports.	Here they are. The passports.
1926	01:22:12,303	01:22:13,220	Passports?	Passports?
1927	01:22:13,304	01:22:15,514	I'm flying back to the states, and I'm taking the kids with me.	I'm flying back to the states, and I'm taking the kids with me.
1928	01:22:15,556	01:22:17,475	- You're what? - You heard me.	- You're what? - You heard me.
1929	01:22:17,516	01:22:19,894	What are you sore about now? I got Otto back, didn't I?	What are you sore about now? I got Otto back, didn't I?
1930	01:22:19,977	01:22:20,895	I'm remodeling him.	I'm remodeling him.
1931	01:22:20,978	01:22:22,688	Somebody should do a little job on you.	Somebody should do a little job on you.
1932	01:22:22,772	01:22:23,773	Good-bye, Mac.	Good-bye, Mac.
1933	01:22:23,856	01:22:25,691	Phyllis, you can't walk out on me like this.	Phyllis, you can't walk out on me like this.
1934	01:22:25,775	01:22:26,817	I'm not walking out.	I'm not walking out.
1935	01:22:26,859	01:22:28,277	I'm just going back where I belong...	I'm just going back where I belong...
1936	01:22:28,361	01:22:29,737	and any time you'd care to join us...	and any time you'd care to join us...
1937	01:22:29,820	01:22:30,863	we'll be waiting for you.	we'll be waiting for you.
1938	01:22:30,947	01:22:32,531	The adoption papers, they are ready.	The adoption papers, they are ready.
1939	01:22:32,615	01:22:33,783	Heraus.	Heraus.
1940	01:22:34,367	01:22:36,619	What's come over you, Phyllis? After sixteen years...	What's come over you, Phyllis? After sixteen years...
1941	01:22:36,702	01:22:37,954	Maybe after sixteen years...	Maybe after sixteen years...
1942	01:22:38,037	01:22:39,705	every marriage gets a little stale...	every marriage gets a little stale...
1943	01:22:39,789	01:22:41,123	like a leftover glass of beer.	like a leftover glass of beer.
1944	01:22:41,207	01:22:42,750	Look, Phyllis, can't we discuss this problem...	Look, Phyllis, can't we discuss this problem...
1945	01:22:42,833	01:22:44,377	without bringing up a rival beverage?	without bringing up a rival beverage?
1946	01:22:44,418	01:22:46,712	I hope these vaccination certificates are still good.	I hope these vaccination certificates are still good.
1947	01:22:46,796	01:22:48,714	Look, Phyllis, you knew the kind of a guy I was...	Look, Phyllis, you knew the kind of a guy I was...
1948	01:22:48,798	01:22:49,715	when you married me.	when you married me.
1949	01:22:49,799	01:22:50,716	Apparently not.	Apparently not.
1950	01:22:50,800	01:22:52,218	I'm not one of those suburban jokers...	I'm not one of those suburban jokers...
1951	01:22:52,301	01:22:54,553	9:00 to 5:00 in the office, home on the commuter train...	9:00 to 5:00 in the office, home on the commuter train...
1952	01:22:54,595	01:22:55,680	cut the grass every weekend.	cut the grass every weekend.
1953	01:22:55,721	01:22:57,890	Turns out I married Marco Polo.	Turns out I married Marco Polo.
1954	01:22:58,015	01:23:00,476	Well, it wasn't all that bad, those sixteen years.	Well, it wasn't all that bad, those sixteen years.
1955	01:23:00,518	01:23:01,686	We've had some fun.	We've had some fun.
1956	01:23:01,769	01:23:04,105	Remember Teheran when Cindy was born...	Remember Teheran when Cindy was born...
1957	01:23:04,188	01:23:06,774	driving 12 miles to the hospital in a Coca-Cola truck?	driving 12 miles to the hospital in a Coca-Cola truck?
1958	01:23:06,857	01:23:07,775	Some fun.	Some fun.
1959	01:23:07,858	01:23:09,860	And remember when I had Tommy?	And remember when I had Tommy?
1960	01:23:09,944	01:23:11,529	Do I ever. Right in the Zurich airport.	Do I ever. Right in the Zurich airport.
1961	01:23:11,612	01:23:14,031	We had a hell of a time getting him out of customs.	We had a hell of a time getting him out of customs.
1962	01:23:14,073	01:23:16,325	And how about our honeymoon, that wonderful week in Waikiki?	And how about our honeymoon, that wonderful week in Waikiki?
1963	01:23:16,367	01:23:19,912	Yeah, me upstairs putting perfume behind my ears.	Yeah, me upstairs putting perfume behind my ears.
1964	01:23:19,954	01:23:22,707	You downstairs at a soft drink convention.	You downstairs at a soft drink convention.
1965	01:23:22,748	01:23:25,376	Four hundred men running around in grass skirts.	Four hundred men running around in grass skirts.
1966	01:23:25,459	01:23:27,378	I should have said aloha right then and there.	I should have said aloha right then and there.
1967	01:23:27,461	01:23:29,255	Now, be a good girl and give me those.	Now, be a good girl and give me those.
1968	01:23:29,338	01:23:30,881	Let's talk this over.	Let's talk this over.
1969	01:23:30,923	01:23:32,800	All right. I'm willing.	All right. I'm willing.
1970	01:23:35,594	01:23:36,554	But not right now.	But not right now.
1971	01:23:36,595	01:23:37,888	The Hazeltines will be here at noon.	The Hazeltines will be here at noon.
1972	01:23:37,972	01:23:39,223	I've got a deadline.	I've got a deadline.
1973	01:23:39,306	01:23:41,267	You've got a deadline with me.	You've got a deadline with me.
1974	01:23:41,350	01:23:42,476	Phyllis, baby, I love you.	Phyllis, baby, I love you.
1975	01:23:42,518	01:23:44,854	Take my word for it. Everything is going to be fine.	Take my word for it. Everything is going to be fine.
1976	01:23:44,937	01:23:47,023	We'll be living in London. Tommy can go to Oxford.	We'll be living in London. Tommy can go to Oxford.
1977	01:23:47,106	01:23:48,733	Cindy can watch the changing of the guard.	Cindy can watch the changing of the guard.
1978	01:23:48,816	01:23:50,526	We can afford one of those snooty butlers...	We can afford one of those snooty butlers...
1979	01:23:50,568	01:23:51,861	kippers and marmalade for breakfast...	kippers and marmalade for breakfast...
1980	01:23:51,944	01:23:53,612	riding to hounds.	riding to hounds.
1981	01:23:55,114	01:23:57,533	I will not be caught dead in striped pants.	I will not be caught dead in striped pants.
1982	01:23:57,575	01:23:59,285	They're for bankers and war profiteers.	They're for bankers and war profiteers.
1983	01:23:59,368	01:24:00,619	Actually, they were ordered...	Actually, they were ordered...
1984	01:24:00,703	01:24:03,539	by the ambassador from the People's Republic of Yugoslavia.	by the ambassador from the People's Republic of Yugoslavia.
1985	01:24:03,622	01:24:05,458	We will deal with Tito when the time comes.	We will deal with Tito when the time comes.
1986	01:24:05,541	01:24:06,876	Meanwhile, take them off and fix them.	Meanwhile, take them off and fix them.
1987	01:24:06,959	01:24:07,877	They're much too big.	They're much too big.
1988	01:24:07,960	01:24:08,919	In front of the lady?	In front of the lady?
1989	01:24:09,003	01:24:11,380	Oh, yeah, I... I forgot. He doesn't wear shorts.	Oh, yeah, I... I forgot. He doesn't wear shorts.
1990	01:24:11,464	01:24:13,007	No wonder they're winning the Cold War.	No wonder they're winning the Cold War.
1991	01:24:13,132	01:24:14,884	All right. In the other room.	All right. In the other room.
1992	01:24:18,596	01:24:19,764	Don't go away, Phyllis.	Don't go away, Phyllis.
1993	01:24:22,892	01:24:25,186	Ingeborg, get him some shorts.	Ingeborg, get him some shorts.
1994	01:24:25,227	01:24:26,520	Sitzen machen.	Sitzen machen.
1995	01:24:31,150	01:24:32,693	Good morning, Mrs. MacNamara.	Good morning, Mrs. MacNamara.
1996	01:24:32,777	01:24:33,736	Guten Morgen.	Guten Morgen.
1997	01:24:33,819	01:24:36,947	Shorts. Let me see. Where are the shorts?	Shorts. Let me see. Where are the shorts?
1998	01:24:38,074	01:24:40,367	You could use some yourself.	You could use some yourself.
1999	01:24:40,451	01:24:42,536	Oh, I don't want you to think...	Oh, I don't want you to think...
2000	01:24:42,620	01:24:44,455	I come to the office like this every day.	I come to the office like this every day.
2001	01:24:44,538	01:24:45,956	That's a load off my mind.	That's a load off my mind.
2002	01:24:46,040	01:24:47,374	It's just that last night...	It's just that last night...
2003	01:24:47,458	01:24:49,210	Mr. MacNamara made me take my dress off.	Mr. MacNamara made me take my dress off.
2004	01:24:49,251	01:24:50,211	Playful, isn't he?	Playful, isn't he?
2005	01:24:50,252	01:24:51,712	Oh, he had a perfect right to.	Oh, he had a perfect right to.
2006	01:24:51,796	01:24:53,130	After all, he paid for it.	After all, he paid for it.
2007	01:24:53,214	01:24:54,882	Well, that makes all the difference.	Well, that makes all the difference.
2008	01:24:54,924	01:24:56,383	No, no, no. You don't understand.	No, no, no. You don't understand.
2009	01:24:56,467	01:24:59,887	It's part of my job... what you call fringe benefits.	It's part of my job... what you call fringe benefits.
2010	01:25:00,888	01:25:04,225	How do you like that? The son of a...	How do you like that? The son of a...
2011	01:25:04,308	01:25:06,477	is starting his own Marshall Plan.	is starting his own Marshall Plan.
2012	01:25:06,519	01:25:08,854	Oh, here. I go now.	Oh, here. I go now.
2013	01:25:08,896	01:25:11,190	We both go now.	We both go now.
2014	01:25:12,274	01:25:14,026	Will you please give my husband a message?	Will you please give my husband a message?
2015	01:25:14,068	01:25:15,528	Tell him I said aloha.	Tell him I said aloha.
2016	01:25:15,569	01:25:16,529	Aloha?	Aloha?
2017	01:25:16,570	01:25:18,405	That's Hawaiian for "get lost."	That's Hawaiian for "get lost."
2018	01:25:21,784	01:25:22,743	What's holding up those shorts?	What's holding up those shorts?
2019	01:25:22,827	01:25:23,744	Right here.	Right here.
2020	01:25:23,828	01:25:26,455	And your wife said to tell you aloha.	And your wife said to tell you aloha.
2021	01:25:26,539	01:25:29,166	That's Hawaiian for "get lost."	That's Hawaiian for "get lost."
2022	01:25:29,208	01:25:30,584	Phyllis!	Phyllis!
2023	01:25:38,467	01:25:39,885	The dinner, where do you want it?	The dinner, where do you want it?
2024	01:25:39,969	01:25:41,387	In the conference room.	In the conference room.
2025	01:25:42,555	01:25:43,514	Phyllis!	Phyllis!
2026	01:25:43,556	01:25:45,391	Mr. MacNamara, my name is Untermeier.	Mr. MacNamara, my name is Untermeier.
2027	01:25:45,474	01:25:46,684	I'm a reporter from the "Tageblatt."	I'm a reporter from the "Tageblatt."
2028	01:25:46,725	01:25:48,352	Don't bother me. Some other time.	Don't bother me. Some other time.
2029	01:25:48,435	01:25:49,687	But this is important.	But this is important.
2030	01:25:49,728	01:25:51,522	We have information that Miss Hazeltine of Coca-Cola...	We have information that Miss Hazeltine of Coca-Cola...
2031	01:25:51,605	01:25:53,274	married somebody in East Berlin...	married somebody in East Berlin...
2032	01:25:53,357	01:25:54,650	a member of the Communist Party.	a member of the Communist Party.
2033	01:25:54,692	01:25:56,527	Sitzen machen.	Sitzen machen.
2034	01:25:56,569	01:25:58,529	I will not wear these. They look ridiculous.	I will not wear these. They look ridiculous.
2035	01:25:58,612	01:25:59,697	They serve no useful purpose.	They serve no useful purpose.
2036	01:25:59,780	01:26:01,365	Darling, it's just a convention.	Darling, it's just a convention.
2037	01:26:01,448	01:26:03,534	Back home, we even put panties on lamb chops.	Back home, we even put panties on lamb chops.
2038	01:26:03,617	01:26:05,786	They are drip and dry. 50% nylon.	They are drip and dry. 50% nylon.
2039	01:26:05,870	01:26:09,081	Nylon? That's DuPont. I'll wear no monopoly.	Nylon? That's DuPont. I'll wear no monopoly.
2040	01:26:09,123	01:26:11,250	They're also 50% cotton. That'll help...	They're also 50% cotton. That'll help...
2041	01:26:11,333	01:26:12,668	those sharecroppers in Mississippi.	those sharecroppers in Mississippi.
2042	01:26:12,710	01:26:15,004	All right. Sit down. Let's see how you eat.	All right. Sit down. Let's see how you eat.
2043	01:26:15,045	01:26:18,465	Eat? That's the first good idea he's had.	Eat? That's the first good idea he's had.
2044	01:26:18,549	01:26:19,842	I'm starving.	I'm starving.
2045	01:26:19,884	01:26:21,135	No, not like that.	No, not like that.
2046	01:26:21,218	01:26:22,720	Start with the first course.	Start with the first course.
2047	01:26:22,761	01:26:24,597	We have to teach him some table manners.	We have to teach him some table manners.
2048	01:26:24,680	01:26:26,849	No, no. One at a time.	No, no. One at a time.
2049	01:26:26,932	01:26:29,101	And use the asparagus tongs, darling.	And use the asparagus tongs, darling.
2050	01:26:29,185	01:26:30,102	The what?	The what?
2051	01:26:30,186	01:26:31,937	Those little grabbers over there.	Those little grabbers over there.
2052	01:26:34,773	01:26:36,066	Why can't I have my chicken?	Why can't I have my chicken?
2053	01:26:36,150	01:26:38,068	Luggage. OK. Fill those up...	Luggage. OK. Fill those up...
2054	01:26:38,152	01:26:39,528	and take them over to the bridal suite at the Hilton.	and take them over to the bridal suite at the Hilton.
2055	01:26:39,612	01:26:41,071	You want initials on the bags?	You want initials on the bags?
2056	01:26:41,155	01:26:43,115	Initials? He doesn't even have a name yet.	Initials? He doesn't even have a name yet.
2057	01:26:43,199	01:26:44,366	No!	No!
2058	01:26:45,034	01:26:45,951	He's right, darling.	He's right, darling.
2059	01:26:46,035	01:26:48,162	Always white wine with chicken.	Always white wine with chicken.
2060	01:26:49,121	01:26:51,123	Out of a glass, stupid.	Out of a glass, stupid.
2061	01:26:51,165	01:26:53,334	Yeah, you know everything.	Yeah, you know everything.
2062	01:26:53,375	01:26:55,711	Which wine to drink, which fork to use for fish...	Which wine to drink, which fork to use for fish...
2063	01:26:55,794	01:26:58,464	which knife to stab the proletariat in the back with.	which knife to stab the proletariat in the back with.
2064	01:26:58,547	01:27:01,091	How would you like a little fruit for dessert?	How would you like a little fruit for dessert?
2065	01:27:01,175	01:27:03,093	The Count is waiting in the office.	The Count is waiting in the office.
2066	01:27:03,177	01:27:04,887	All right. Scarlett, keep working on him.	All right. Scarlett, keep working on him.
2067	01:27:04,970	01:27:06,889	Here, darling. Use the finger bowl.	Here, darling. Use the finger bowl.
2068	01:27:06,972	01:27:08,515	No, no. Don't pack his old clothes.	No, no. Don't pack his old clothes.
2069	01:27:08,599	01:27:09,808	What shall we do with them?	What shall we do with them?
2070	01:27:09,850	01:27:11,393	Burn them, but first have them disinfected.	Burn them, but first have them disinfected.
2071	01:27:11,477	01:27:12,394	Wait a minute!	Wait a minute!
2072	01:27:12,478	01:27:14,355	My party membership book is in there.	My party membership book is in there.
2073	01:27:14,438	01:27:16,607	I'm paid up till December.	I'm paid up till December.
2074	01:27:29,870	01:27:30,788	Sitzen machen.	Sitzen machen.
2075	01:27:30,871	01:27:32,039	Hello there.	Hello there.
2076	01:27:32,623	01:27:35,042	Waldemar von Droste-Schattenburg.	Waldemar von Droste-Schattenburg.
2077	01:27:35,084	01:27:37,878	MacNamara von Omaha, Nebraska.	MacNamara von Omaha, Nebraska.
2078	01:27:37,920	01:27:40,547	Would you mind telling me why I was summoned here?	Would you mind telling me why I was summoned here?
2079	01:27:40,631	01:27:42,383	Because every minute I am away from my post...	Because every minute I am away from my post...
2080	01:27:42,424	01:27:44,051	it costs me two marks in tips.	it costs me two marks in tips.
2081	01:27:44,134	01:27:45,135	OK. I'll lay it on the line.	OK. I'll lay it on the line.
2082	01:27:45,219	01:27:47,054	How would you like to become a father?	How would you like to become a father?
2083	01:27:47,096	01:27:48,097	At my age?	At my age?
2084	01:27:48,180	01:27:50,015	There's a young man I'd like you to adopt...	There's a young man I'd like you to adopt...
2085	01:27:50,099	01:27:52,685	And the tip is two thousand marks.	And the tip is two thousand marks.
2086	01:27:52,768	01:27:53,686	Good day, sir.	Good day, sir.
2087	01:27:53,769	01:27:55,020	Hold on there, Count.	Hold on there, Count.
2088	01:27:55,104	01:27:56,689	Just because I am reduced...	Just because I am reduced...
2089	01:27:56,772	01:27:58,482	to earning my living in a washroom...	to earning my living in a washroom...
2090	01:27:58,524	01:28:00,192	does not mean that I'm willing to peddle...	does not mean that I'm willing to peddle...
2091	01:28:00,276	01:28:03,028	the honor and dignity of my family name.	the honor and dignity of my family name.
2092	01:28:03,112	01:28:05,823	The von Droste-Schattenburgs date back to the Second Crusade.	The von Droste-Schattenburgs date back to the Second Crusade.
2093	01:28:05,864	01:28:08,117	We have one of the oldest bloodlines in Europe...	We have one of the oldest bloodlines in Europe...
2094	01:28:08,200	01:28:09,743	and one of the most inbred.	and one of the most inbred.
2095	01:28:09,827	01:28:12,746	I am a direct descendant of Philip the Bleeder.	I am a direct descendant of Philip the Bleeder.
2096	01:28:12,830	01:28:14,915	So your proposition is not only preposterous...	So your proposition is not only preposterous...
2097	01:28:14,999	01:28:17,710	it is highly insulting.	it is highly insulting.
2098	01:28:17,751	01:28:19,044	Make it ten thousand marks.	Make it ten thousand marks.
2099	01:28:19,086	01:28:20,045	I'll give you three thousand.	I'll give you three thousand.
2100	01:28:20,087	01:28:21,046	Please. I just told you...	Please. I just told you...
2101	01:28:21,088	01:28:22,548	I come from a long line of bleeders...	I come from a long line of bleeders...
2102	01:28:22,631	01:28:23,549	so don't cut the price.	so don't cut the price.
2103	01:28:23,632	01:28:24,550	Four thousand.	Four thousand.
2104	01:28:24,633	01:28:26,218	I will have you know...	I will have you know...
2105	01:28:26,260	01:28:29,179	that I am distantly related to ex-King Farouk of Egypt.	that I am distantly related to ex-King Farouk of Egypt.
2106	01:28:29,221	01:28:30,180	Thirty-five hundred.	Thirty-five hundred.
2107	01:28:30,222	01:28:31,140	What happened to four thousand?	What happened to four thousand?
2108	01:28:31,223	01:28:33,100	It's a deal.	It's a deal.
2109	01:28:33,183	01:28:34,601	Ingeborg, send Piffl in here.	Ingeborg, send Piffl in here.
2110	01:28:34,685	01:28:38,814	For an additional 500 marks, I will include the family crest.	For an additional 500 marks, I will include the family crest.
2111	01:28:38,856	01:28:41,525	What is it, two cakes of soap on a field of paper towels?	What is it, two cakes of soap on a field of paper towels?
2112	01:28:41,608	01:28:44,737	A porcupine rampant on a field of fleur-de-lis.	A porcupine rampant on a field of fleur-de-lis.
2113	01:28:44,820	01:28:47,948	You may also have a photograph of the Schattenburg Castle...	You may also have a photograph of the Schattenburg Castle...
2114	01:28:48,032	01:28:49,908	unfortunately destroyed during the war.	unfortunately destroyed during the war.
2115	01:28:49,992	01:28:50,909	American Air Force?	American Air Force?
2116	01:28:50,993	01:28:54,204	No. Turkish cavalry. 1683.	No. Turkish cavalry. 1683.
2117	01:28:54,705	01:28:56,123	You can't just order me around...	You can't just order me around...
2118	01:28:56,206	01:28:57,833	"Come here, sit there, do this, eat that!"	"Come here, sit there, do this, eat that!"
2119	01:28:57,875	01:29:00,252	Darling, hold still. I can't get your cuff link in.	Darling, hold still. I can't get your cuff link in.
2120	01:29:00,294	01:29:01,879	Is this the lucky young man?	Is this the lucky young man?
2121	01:29:01,962	01:29:04,173	That's him. Meet your father.	That's him. Meet your father.
2122	01:29:04,214	01:29:05,174	My father?	My father?
2123	01:29:05,215	01:29:06,467	Ah, my dear boy.	Ah, my dear boy.
2124	01:29:06,550	01:29:08,552	I'm sure you will be a credit to the family.	I'm sure you will be a credit to the family.
2125	01:29:08,635	01:29:10,095	It could use a little credit.	It could use a little credit.
2126	01:29:10,596	01:29:11,555	What is all this?	What is all this?
2127	01:29:11,597	01:29:12,722	You're being adopted.	You're being adopted.
2128	01:29:12,723	01:29:16,018	Adopted? Just like that, without even asking me?	Adopted? Just like that, without even asking me?
2129	01:29:16,101	01:29:18,520	This is not only devious, it's unilateral.	This is not only devious, it's unilateral.
2130	01:29:18,604	01:29:20,272	My eye. What's the matter with my eye?	My eye. What's the matter with my eye?
2131	01:29:20,356	01:29:23,108	- This is your daughter-in-law. - Gnädige Frau.	- This is your daughter-in-law. - Gnädige Frau.
2132	01:29:23,192	01:29:25,069	Scarlett, I've got something in my eye!	Scarlett, I've got something in my eye!
2133	01:29:25,152	01:29:27,946	It's a monocle. Looks cute on you.	It's a monocle. Looks cute on you.
2134	01:29:28,030	01:29:30,366	A monocle? How sneaky can you get?	A monocle? How sneaky can you get?
2135	01:29:30,449	01:29:31,825	Go in there and sign the papers...	Go in there and sign the papers...
2136	01:29:31,867	01:29:34,036	and give this to the cashier on the way out.	and give this to the cashier on the way out.
2137	01:29:34,078	01:29:35,037	Thank you.	Thank you.
2138	01:29:35,079	01:29:36,205	What do you think you're doing?	What do you think you're doing?
2139	01:29:36,288	01:29:38,415	It's on the house, no charge.	It's on the house, no charge.
2140	01:29:38,499	01:29:40,292	Good-bye, my son.	Good-bye, my son.
2141	01:29:42,544	01:29:44,880	Now, I want you kids to memorize your new name.	Now, I want you kids to memorize your new name.
2142	01:29:44,963	01:29:47,800	You are the Count and Countess von Droste-Schattenburg.	You are the Count and Countess von Droste-Schattenburg.
2143	01:29:47,883	01:29:49,051	Count?	Count?
2144	01:29:49,134	01:29:51,220	Countess! That means everybody has to curtsy to me...	Countess! That means everybody has to curtsy to me...
2145	01:29:51,261	01:29:52,721	except maybe Grace Kelly.	except maybe Grace Kelly.
2146	01:29:52,805	01:29:54,348	Nobody will curtsy to you.	Nobody will curtsy to you.
2147	01:29:54,431	01:29:56,183	I refuse to join the aristocracy.	I refuse to join the aristocracy.
2148	01:29:56,266	01:29:57,267	They're all leeches...	They're all leeches...
2149	01:29:57,351	01:29:59,269	bleeding the underprivileged masses.	bleeding the underprivileged masses.
2150	01:29:59,353	01:30:00,354	Not the von Droste-Schattenburgs.	Not the von Droste-Schattenburgs.
2151	01:30:00,437	01:30:01,355	They bleed themselves.	They bleed themselves.
2152	01:30:01,438	01:30:03,649	Take him into the other room and get him dressed.	Take him into the other room and get him dressed.
2153	01:30:03,690	01:30:05,025	And now that he's got a name...	And now that he's got a name...
2154	01:30:05,109	01:30:06,860	there are some things I want him to sign.	there are some things I want him to sign.
2155	01:30:06,944	01:30:07,861	What things?	What things?
2156	01:30:07,945	01:30:09,196	First, I'm turning over my limousine...	First, I'm turning over my limousine...
2157	01:30:09,279	01:30:10,280	and my chauffeur to you.	and my chauffeur to you.
2158	01:30:10,364	01:30:11,990	All I want is my motorcycle back.	All I want is my motorcycle back.
2159	01:30:12,032	01:30:14,576	Whoever heard of a countess in a sidecar?	Whoever heard of a countess in a sidecar?
2160	01:30:14,660	01:30:16,036	Besides, where will we put the baby?	Besides, where will we put the baby?
2161	01:30:16,078	01:30:17,496	And have him fill out these applications...	And have him fill out these applications...
2162	01:30:17,538	01:30:18,539	Golf club, Diners Club...	Golf club, Diners Club...
2163	01:30:18,580	01:30:19,957	Blue Cross, Book of the Month Club...	Blue Cross, Book of the Month Club...
2164	01:30:20,040	01:30:20,999	Fruit of the Month Club.	Fruit of the Month Club.
2165	01:30:21,041	01:30:22,543	I will sign nothing. I will join nothing.	I will sign nothing. I will join nothing.
2166	01:30:22,626	01:30:25,087	But, darling, it's the American way of life.	But, darling, it's the American way of life.
2167	01:30:25,170	01:30:26,672	American way of life.	American way of life.
2168	01:30:26,713	01:30:28,132	Unemployment, discrimination...	Unemployment, discrimination...
2169	01:30:28,215	01:30:30,676	gangsterism, juvenile delinquency...	gangsterism, juvenile delinquency...
2170	01:30:30,717	01:30:32,886	but under our new twenty-year plan...	but under our new twenty-year plan...
2171	01:30:32,928	01:30:34,221	we will catch up with you.	we will catch up with you.
2172	01:30:34,304	01:30:35,722	Lots of luck.	Lots of luck.
2173	01:30:36,223	01:30:38,100	Ingeborg, get the manager of the bottling plant...	Ingeborg, get the manager of the bottling plant...
2174	01:30:38,183	01:30:39,351	up here right away...	up here right away...
2175	01:30:39,435	01:30:41,520	and see if you can find me a sign painter in a hurry.	and see if you can find me a sign painter in a hurry.
2176	01:30:42,563	01:30:44,106	What M.P.s?	What M.P.s?
2177	01:30:51,697	01:30:53,031	What can I do for you boys?	What can I do for you boys?
2178	01:30:53,115	01:30:54,199	Are you the head man around here?	Are you the head man around here?
2179	01:30:54,283	01:30:55,200	That's me.	That's me.
2180	01:30:55,284	01:30:56,535	We have a report from one of our G.I.s...	We have a report from one of our G.I.s...
2181	01:30:56,618	01:30:57,661	you've got a female employee here...	you've got a female employee here...
2182	01:30:57,703	01:30:58,662	who's an enemy agent.	who's an enemy agent.
2183	01:30:58,704	01:30:59,788	Enemy agent?	Enemy agent?
2184	01:30:59,872	01:31:01,373	What would you call a dame that's running around...	What would you call a dame that's running around...
2185	01:31:01,415	01:31:03,417	with "Yankee go home" tattooed on her chest?	with "Yankee go home" tattooed on her chest?
2186	01:31:03,542	01:31:04,751	Somebody must be pulling your leg.	Somebody must be pulling your leg.
2187	01:31:04,835	01:31:07,379	Maybe and maybe not. Mind if we look around?	Maybe and maybe not. Mind if we look around?
2188	01:31:07,421	01:31:08,380	Be my guest.	Be my guest.
2189	01:31:08,422	01:31:11,049	Oh, OK, buster.	Oh, OK, buster.
2190	01:31:11,133	01:31:12,134	Let's go.	Let's go.
2191	01:31:15,304	01:31:16,263	You sent for me, sir?	You sent for me, sir?
2192	01:31:16,346	01:31:17,681	Krause, as manager of the bottling plant...	Krause, as manager of the bottling plant...
2193	01:31:17,723	01:31:19,224	you're always complaining that you need more help.	you're always complaining that you need more help.
2194	01:31:19,308	01:31:20,309	Yes, sir. We're very busy downstairs.	Yes, sir. We're very busy downstairs.
2195	01:31:20,350	01:31:22,394	Well, cheer up. You're going to get an assistant.	Well, cheer up. You're going to get an assistant.
2196	01:31:22,478	01:31:23,395	- Who? - You.	- Who? - You.
2197	01:31:23,479	01:31:24,646	- Me? - That's right.	- Me? - That's right.
2198	01:31:24,688	01:31:26,023	The new manager of the bottling plant...	The new manager of the bottling plant...
2199	01:31:26,106	01:31:27,649	is Otto von Droste-Schattenburg.	is Otto von Droste-Schattenburg.
2200	01:31:27,691	01:31:28,942	I refuse.	I refuse.
2201	01:31:29,026	01:31:30,402	Your position may be lower, but your pay will be higher.	Your position may be lower, but your pay will be higher.
2202	01:31:30,486	01:31:31,403	I accept.	I accept.
2203	01:31:31,487	01:31:32,863	All right. Into the conference room.	All right. Into the conference room.
2204	01:31:32,946	01:31:33,864	You've got fifteen minutes...	You've got fifteen minutes...
2205	01:31:33,947	01:31:35,324	to teach this guy everything you know...	to teach this guy everything you know...
2206	01:31:35,365	01:31:36,325	about the bottling business.	about the bottling business.
2207	01:31:36,366	01:31:37,659	I can't thank you enough.	I can't thank you enough.
2208	01:31:37,701	01:31:38,660	Out.	Out.
2209	01:31:38,702	01:31:40,370	Bertha, let me talk to Mrs. MacNamara.	Bertha, let me talk to Mrs. MacNamara.
2210	01:31:40,454	01:31:42,372	What do you mean she packed up and left?	What do you mean she packed up and left?
2211	01:31:42,456	01:31:44,458	Mit die Kinder? Where did they go?	Mit die Kinder? Where did they go?
2212	01:31:44,541	01:31:47,169	Into a taxi. Thanks a lot.	Into a taxi. Thanks a lot.
2213	01:31:48,003	01:31:50,047	Mr. MacNamara, I don't want to take up your time...	Mr. MacNamara, I don't want to take up your time...
2214	01:31:50,130	01:31:52,049	so if you'll just let me talk to Miss Hazeltine.	so if you'll just let me talk to Miss Hazeltine.
2215	01:31:52,132	01:31:53,050	About what?	About what?
2216	01:31:53,133	01:31:55,427	About her marriage to that Communist in East Berlin.	About her marriage to that Communist in East Berlin.
2217	01:31:55,469	01:31:57,304	I'd like a statement before we print the story.	I'd like a statement before we print the story.
2218	01:31:57,387	01:31:59,097	There is no story, and there's no Communist.	There is no story, and there's no Communist.
2219	01:31:59,181	01:32:00,349	But we know she got married.	But we know she got married.
2220	01:32:00,432	01:32:02,851	Sure she did, to Count Otto von Droste-Schattenburg.	Sure she did, to Count Otto von Droste-Schattenburg.
2221	01:32:02,935	01:32:04,144	- Who? - Otto the Bleeder.	- Who? - Otto the Bleeder.
2222	01:32:04,186	01:32:06,355	Goes all the way back to the Second Crusade...	Goes all the way back to the Second Crusade...
2223	01:32:06,438	01:32:08,899	a Turkish cavalry. Here's the family castle.	a Turkish cavalry. Here's the family castle.
2224	01:32:08,982	01:32:09,900	Painter.	Painter.
2225	01:32:09,983	01:32:11,777	Oh, uh...	Oh, uh...
2226	01:32:11,860	01:32:13,529	come with me.	come with me.
2227	01:32:16,823	01:32:17,950	Sitzen machen.	Sitzen machen.
2228	01:32:18,033	01:32:20,369	I want you to paint this crest on the door of a car.	I want you to paint this crest on the door of a car.
2229	01:32:20,452	01:32:21,870	How long will it take? That's too long.	How long will it take? That's too long.
2230	01:32:21,954	01:32:24,122	Look, my Mercedes is parked downstairs.	Look, my Mercedes is parked downstairs.
2231	01:32:25,749	01:32:27,167	Oh, excuse me.	Oh, excuse me.
2232	01:32:27,209	01:32:28,418	- Miss Hazeltine? - Yes?	- Miss Hazeltine? - Yes?
2233	01:32:28,502	01:32:30,170	How do you spell your husband's name?	How do you spell your husband's name?
2234	01:32:30,212	01:32:32,256	P-I-f-f-I.	P-I-f-f-I.
2235	01:32:32,339	01:32:34,800	Piffl? I thought it was von Droste-Schattenburg.	Piffl? I thought it was von Droste-Schattenburg.
2236	01:32:34,883	01:32:36,468	Oh, that. You mustn't believe...	Oh, that. You mustn't believe...
2237	01:32:36,510	01:32:37,970	everything Mr. MacNamara tells you.	everything Mr. MacNamara tells you.
2238	01:32:38,053	01:32:39,638	He fixed it all up...	He fixed it all up...
2239	01:32:39,721	01:32:41,722	so that Daddy wouldn't find out Otto's a Red.	so that Daddy wouldn't find out Otto's a Red.
2240	01:32:41,723	01:32:42,766	Mm-hmm.	Mm-hmm.
2241	01:32:42,849	01:32:44,851	In the beginning, I didn't like Mr. MacNamara...	In the beginning, I didn't like Mr. MacNamara...
2242	01:32:44,935	01:32:46,228	but he's been just marvy.	but he's been just marvy.
2243	01:32:46,311	01:32:47,854	That's enough out of you, Countess.	That's enough out of you, Countess.
2244	01:32:47,896	01:32:48,855	Did I say something wrong?	Did I say something wrong?
2245	01:32:48,939	01:32:49,982	Buzz off, will you?	Buzz off, will you?
2246	01:32:50,023	01:32:51,692	You said there was no story...	You said there was no story...
2247	01:32:51,733	01:32:53,026	and it's getting better and better.	and it's getting better and better.
2248	01:32:53,068	01:32:55,070	How much do you want to forget the whole thing?	How much do you want to forget the whole thing?
2249	01:32:55,153	01:32:57,197	You think you can buy a German newspaperman?	You think you can buy a German newspaperman?
2250	01:32:57,239	01:32:58,407	I never tried before.	I never tried before.
2251	01:32:58,490	01:33:00,200	Maybe in America your journalists are for sale...	Maybe in America your journalists are for sale...
2252	01:33:00,284	01:33:01,451	but here in Germany...	but here in Germany...
2253	01:33:01,535	01:33:05,414	The adoption papers. All signed and notarized.	The adoption papers. All signed and notarized.
2254	01:33:05,497	01:33:07,207	Herr Oberleutnant.	Herr Oberleutnant.
2255	01:33:07,291	01:33:08,208	You two know each other?	You two know each other?
2256	01:33:08,292	01:33:09,418	He was my commanding officer.	He was my commanding officer.
2257	01:33:09,501	01:33:10,419	In the subway?	In the subway?
2258	01:33:10,502	01:33:11,920	No, after that, when I was drafted.	No, after that, when I was drafted.
2259	01:33:12,004	01:33:12,921	Aha! Gestapo.	Aha! Gestapo.
2260	01:33:13,005	01:33:14,547	No, no. S.S.	No, no. S.S.
2261	01:33:14,548	01:33:16,466	Halten Sie doch den Mund, Idiot.	Halten Sie doch den Mund, Idiot.
2262	01:33:16,550	01:33:18,051	Well, Herr Oberleutnant...	Well, Herr Oberleutnant...
2263	01:33:18,135	01:33:20,304	is there anything else I can do for you?	is there anything else I can do for you?
2264	01:33:21,722	01:33:24,099	No, thank you. I have all the facts.	No, thank you. I have all the facts.
2265	01:33:24,182	01:33:25,100	Union between two...	Union between two...
2266	01:33:25,183	01:33:26,685	internationally prominent families...	internationally prominent families...
2267	01:33:26,768	01:33:28,562	The Hazeltines and the von Droste-Schattenburgs.	The Hazeltines and the von Droste-Schattenburgs.
2268	01:33:28,645	01:33:29,855	The social event of the year.	The social event of the year.
2269	01:33:29,938	01:33:31,356	It will be in the afternoon paper.	It will be in the afternoon paper.
2270	01:33:31,398	01:33:32,691	It had better be.	It had better be.
2271	01:33:32,733	01:33:34,693	- Auf Wiedersehen. - Sieg heil.	- Auf Wiedersehen. - Sieg heil.
2272	01:33:34,735	01:33:35,694	As for you, Schlemmer...	As for you, Schlemmer...
2273	01:33:35,736	01:33:37,529	you're back in the S.S... smaller salary.	you're back in the S.S... smaller salary.
2274	01:33:37,613	01:33:38,697	Sir, let me explain.	Sir, let me explain.
2275	01:33:38,739	01:33:41,700	I was only a pastry cook in the officers' mess.	I was only a pastry cook in the officers' mess.
2276	01:33:41,742	01:33:44,077	Ingeborg, I want to speak to the maitre d' at the Hilton.	Ingeborg, I want to speak to the maitre d' at the Hilton.
2277	01:33:44,161	01:33:46,538	I was a very bad pastry cook.	I was a very bad pastry cook.
2278	01:33:48,373	01:33:49,958	11:00. Where are the hats?	11:00. Where are the hats?
2279	01:33:50,042	01:33:51,293	Where are the flowers?	Where are the flowers?
2280	01:33:51,376	01:33:52,544	We're running behind schedule.	We're running behind schedule.
2281	01:33:52,586	01:33:53,712	Yes, sir.	Yes, sir.
2282	01:33:53,754	01:33:56,006	Manfred, I'd like to arrange an intimate little banquet...	Manfred, I'd like to arrange an intimate little banquet...
2283	01:33:56,048	01:33:57,799	The Count and Countess von Droste-Schattenburg...	The Count and Countess von Droste-Schattenburg...
2284	01:33:57,883	01:34:00,552	honoring his in-laws, the Wendell P. Hazeltines.	honoring his in-laws, the Wendell P. Hazeltines.
2285	01:34:01,553	01:34:03,221	Have you got a polka-dot dress?	Have you got a polka-dot dress?
2286	01:34:03,263	01:34:07,351	Look, Fräulein, haben Sie eine tattoo on your, um...	Look, Fräulein, haben Sie eine tattoo on your, um...
2287	01:34:07,434	01:34:08,602	glockenspiel?	glockenspiel?
2288	01:34:27,287	01:34:28,580	Any broads working in this office?	Any broads working in this office?
2289	01:34:28,622	01:34:29,998	No, sir. Just me.	No, sir. Just me.
2290	01:34:30,040	01:34:32,000	- Oh. - Look, Sarge, polka dots.	- Oh. - Look, Sarge, polka dots.
2291	01:34:32,042	01:34:33,001	It fits the description.	It fits the description.
2292	01:34:33,043	01:34:34,002	Hey, whose dress is that?	Hey, whose dress is that?
2293	01:34:34,044	01:34:35,003	I don't know.	I don't know.
2294	01:34:35,045	01:34:36,171	I never saw it before.	I never saw it before.
2295	01:34:36,213	01:34:37,214	We'd better check it out.	We'd better check it out.
2296	01:34:41,134	01:34:43,428	Corporal, I'm relieving myself of duty.	Corporal, I'm relieving myself of duty.
2297	01:34:43,512	01:34:44,888	Better take me back to the base...	Better take me back to the base...
2298	01:34:44,930	01:34:46,347	and turn me in for psychiatric observation.	and turn me in for psychiatric observation.
2299	01:34:46,348	01:34:47,516	What's the matter, Sarge?	What's the matter, Sarge?
2300	01:34:47,599	01:34:48,975	She's in there, all right.	She's in there, all right.
2301	01:34:49,017	01:34:51,269	I saw her... Naked as a jaybird.	I saw her... Naked as a jaybird.
2302	01:34:51,353	01:34:53,438	Has she got the tattoo on her chest?	Has she got the tattoo on her chest?
2303	01:34:53,522	01:34:54,981	So what's wrong, Sarge?	So what's wrong, Sarge?
2304	01:34:55,023	01:34:57,317	Fellas, you won't believe this...	Fellas, you won't believe this...
2305	01:34:57,359	01:34:59,027	but one of them is yellow.	but one of them is yellow.
2306	01:34:59,111	01:35:00,654	One of them is green.	One of them is green.
2307	01:35:00,696	01:35:02,614	Take me away!	Take me away!
2308	01:35:09,746	01:35:10,664	Now, for the entree...	Now, for the entree...
2309	01:35:10,747	01:35:12,040	we'll have venison and hominy grits.	we'll have venison and hominy grits.
2310	01:35:12,082	01:35:13,875	How do I know where you get hominy grits?	How do I know where you get hominy grits?
2311	01:35:13,959	01:35:15,210	Try the Army PX.	Try the Army PX.
2312	01:35:15,293	01:35:17,879	For dessert, peaches flambe a la Hazeltine.	For dessert, peaches flambe a la Hazeltine.
2313	01:35:17,963	01:35:20,882	WINE: King-size Coca-Cola in individual ice buckets.	WINE: King-size Coca-Cola in individual ice buckets.
2314	01:35:20,966	01:35:23,218	TABLE DECORATION: The von Droste-Schattenburg...	TABLE DECORATION: The von Droste-Schattenburg...
2315	01:35:23,301	01:35:24,553	coat of arms with crossed flags...	coat of arms with crossed flags...
2316	01:35:24,594	01:35:25,887	German and Confederate.	German and Confederate.
2317	01:35:25,971	01:35:28,598	MUSIC: "Dixie," "Swanee River," "Waiting for the Robert E. Lee,"	MUSIC: "Dixie," "Swanee River," "Waiting for the Robert E. Lee,"
2318	01:35:28,682	01:35:31,393	but not, I repeat not, "Marching Through Georgia."	but not, I repeat not, "Marching Through Georgia."
2319	01:35:31,476	01:35:34,104	You really want to make me the boss of the bottling plant?	You really want to make me the boss of the bottling plant?
2320	01:35:34,187	01:35:35,689	It's a must so your father-in-law...	It's a must so your father-in-law...
2321	01:35:35,772	01:35:37,107	won't think you're just a titled beatnik...	won't think you're just a titled beatnik...
2322	01:35:37,190	01:35:38,108	sponging off your wife.	sponging off your wife.
2323	01:35:38,191	01:35:39,693	I'm going to like this job.	I'm going to like this job.
2324	01:35:39,776	01:35:41,194	It's about time you started to cooperate.	It's about time you started to cooperate.
2325	01:35:41,278	01:35:43,530	You know what the first thing is I'm going to do?	You know what the first thing is I'm going to do?
2326	01:35:43,613	01:35:46,533	I'm going to lead the workers down there in revolt!	I'm going to lead the workers down there in revolt!
2327	01:35:46,575	01:35:48,869	Put you pants on, Spartacus.	Put you pants on, Spartacus.
2328	01:35:48,952	01:35:50,120	Yeah.	Yeah.
2329	01:35:51,455	01:35:52,539	Ingeborg, call the airport...	Ingeborg, call the airport...
2330	01:35:52,622	01:35:55,417	and find out if the 12:00 plane from London is on time.	and find out if the 12:00 plane from London is on time.
2331	01:35:55,500	01:35:56,877	Yes, Mr. MacNamara.	Yes, Mr. MacNamara.
2332	01:36:06,720	01:36:09,514	Soft drink slaves of the world arise!	Soft drink slaves of the world arise!
2333	01:36:09,556	01:36:10,682	Smash those bottles...	Smash those bottles...
2334	01:36:10,766	01:36:12,851	pour that syrup down the sewers...	pour that syrup down the sewers...
2335	01:36:12,934	01:36:15,520	- Remember me? - Commissar Peripetchikoff.	- Remember me? - Commissar Peripetchikoff.
2336	01:36:15,562	01:36:17,063	Well.	Well.
2337	01:36:17,147	01:36:18,648	Well is the one thing I am not.	Well is the one thing I am not.
2338	01:36:18,690	01:36:19,691	You are a Russian commissar?	You are a Russian commissar?
2339	01:36:19,775	01:36:22,194	For the last time, you have made fool of me!	For the last time, you have made fool of me!
2340	01:36:22,235	01:36:24,029	He fooled me, too. Listen, Commissar...	He fooled me, too. Listen, Commissar...
2341	01:36:24,112	01:36:26,656	you must help me and my wife get into the Soviet Zone.	you must help me and my wife get into the Soviet Zone.
2342	01:36:26,698	01:36:28,033	There may be a little problem.	There may be a little problem.
2343	01:36:28,074	01:36:29,701	Yeah, everybody's coming this way.	Yeah, everybody's coming this way.
2344	01:36:29,743	01:36:31,411	Fifteen hundred people a day.	Fifteen hundred people a day.
2345	01:36:31,495	01:36:32,996	You want to fight all that traffic?	You want to fight all that traffic?
2346	01:36:33,038	01:36:36,166	I'm a party member, paid up till December.	I'm a party member, paid up till December.
2347	01:36:36,208	01:36:37,834	They need me there. I'm a missile scientist.	They need me there. I'm a missile scientist.
2348	01:36:37,876	01:36:41,129	Ah, that is one field where we're ahead of America.	Ah, that is one field where we're ahead of America.
2349	01:36:41,213	01:36:43,173	In Cape Canaveral, if missile goes wrong...	In Cape Canaveral, if missile goes wrong...
2350	01:36:43,215	01:36:45,467	they press special button and pow!	they press special button and pow!
2351	01:36:45,550	01:36:46,468	It blows up...	It blows up...
2352	01:36:46,551	01:36:48,303	but in Russia, we have two buttons.	but in Russia, we have two buttons.
2353	01:36:48,386	01:36:49,304	Two buttons!	Two buttons!
2354	01:36:49,387	01:36:52,140	One to blow up missile, one to blow up scientist.	One to blow up missile, one to blow up scientist.
2355	01:36:52,182	01:36:53,892	What kind of a commissar are you?	What kind of a commissar are you?
2356	01:36:53,975	01:36:55,185	An ex-commissar.	An ex-commissar.
2357	01:36:55,268	01:36:56,853	You've defected?	You've defected?
2358	01:36:56,895	01:36:59,648	Is old Russian proverb... Go west, young man.	Is old Russian proverb... Go west, young man.
2359	01:36:59,689	01:37:01,858	What happened to your pals Mishkin and Borodenko?	What happened to your pals Mishkin and Borodenko?
2360	01:37:01,900	01:37:03,360	In ambulance on the way from Brandenburg Gate...	In ambulance on the way from Brandenburg Gate...
2361	01:37:03,401	01:37:05,362	I snitched Borodenko's Secret Police badge...	I snitched Borodenko's Secret Police badge...
2362	01:37:05,445	01:37:06,530	and had them both arrested.	and had them both arrested.
2363	01:37:06,571	01:37:08,532	You betrayed your own comrades?	You betrayed your own comrades?
2364	01:37:08,615	01:37:11,076	If I don't do it to them, they do it to me.	If I don't do it to them, they do it to me.
2365	01:37:11,159	01:37:13,537	Is old Russian proverb.	Is old Russian proverb.
2366	01:37:13,578	01:37:14,955	You're worse than he is.	You're worse than he is.
2367	01:37:15,038	01:37:16,456	Look, my young friend.	Look, my young friend.
2368	01:37:16,540	01:37:17,916	I don't want to be name-dropper...	I don't want to be name-dropper...
2369	01:37:17,999	01:37:20,710	but what do you think Khrushchev did to Malenkov?	but what do you think Khrushchev did to Malenkov?
2370	01:37:20,794	01:37:22,587	What do you think Stalin did to Trotsky?	What do you think Stalin did to Trotsky?
2371	01:37:22,671	01:37:24,714	Is everybody in this world corrupt?	Is everybody in this world corrupt?
2372	01:37:24,756	01:37:25,799	I don't know everybody.	I don't know everybody.
2373	01:37:25,882	01:37:28,301	Maybe we should liquidate the whole human race...	Maybe we should liquidate the whole human race...
2374	01:37:28,385	01:37:29,886	and start all over again.	and start all over again.
2375	01:37:29,970	01:37:31,263	Look at it this way, kid.	Look at it this way, kid.
2376	01:37:31,346	01:37:33,890	Any world that can produce the Taj Mahal...	Any world that can produce the Taj Mahal...
2377	01:37:33,974	01:37:36,059	William Shakespeare, and striped toothpaste...	William Shakespeare, and striped toothpaste...
2378	01:37:36,142	01:37:37,769	can't be all bad.	can't be all bad.
2379	01:37:39,396	01:37:41,147	The trousers, you can try them on.	The trousers, you can try them on.
2380	01:37:41,189	01:37:42,148	Take him with you.	Take him with you.
2381	01:37:42,190	01:37:44,109	From now on, I fight alone.	From now on, I fight alone.
2382	01:37:44,192	01:37:46,945	It's Piffl against everybody and everything!	It's Piffl against everybody and everything!
2383	01:37:47,028	01:37:48,488	See what I'm up against?	See what I'm up against?
2384	01:37:48,530	01:37:50,407	He can't even remember his own name.	He can't even remember his own name.
2385	01:37:50,490	01:37:51,700	To get back to me...	To get back to me...
2386	01:37:51,783	01:37:52,742	What do you want... money?	What do you want... money?
2387	01:37:52,826	01:37:54,828	Certainly not. I will be rich man now.	Certainly not. I will be rich man now.
2388	01:37:54,953	01:37:56,829	You remember those twenty carloads of Swiss cheese?	You remember those twenty carloads of Swiss cheese?
2389	01:37:56,830	01:37:57,830	What about them?	What about them?
2390	01:37:57,831	01:37:59,165	I have tremendous scheme.	I have tremendous scheme.
2391	01:37:59,207	01:38:01,543	I will trade them for twenty carloads of sauerkraut...	I will trade them for twenty carloads of sauerkraut...
2392	01:38:01,585	01:38:03,003	then I will silver-plate the sauerkraut...	then I will silver-plate the sauerkraut...
2393	01:38:03,044	01:38:04,921	and sell it in the United States...	and sell it in the United States...
2394	01:38:05,005	01:38:05,922	for Christmas tree decorations.	for Christmas tree decorations.
2395	01:38:06,006	01:38:07,048	You're a cinch.	You're a cinch.
2396	01:38:07,090	01:38:09,050	But for this, I need bilingual secretary...	But for this, I need bilingual secretary...
2397	01:38:09,134	01:38:10,719	and you promised me blond lady.	and you promised me blond lady.
2398	01:38:10,802	01:38:12,095	You came at the right time...	You came at the right time...
2399	01:38:12,178	01:38:13,930	because I'm moving to London anyway.	because I'm moving to London anyway.
2400	01:38:14,014	01:38:15,056	The only thing is...	The only thing is...
2401	01:38:15,098	01:38:16,224	I don't know how to break the news to her.	I don't know how to break the news to her.
2402	01:38:17,309	01:38:18,685	Ingeborg!	Ingeborg!
2403	01:38:18,727	01:38:21,187	It's not going to be easy. She's crazy about me.	It's not going to be easy. She's crazy about me.
2404	01:38:21,855	01:38:22,772	Yes, Mr. MacNamara.	Yes, Mr. MacNamara.
2405	01:38:22,856	01:38:25,025	A classified ad to run in all papers.	A classified ad to run in all papers.
2406	01:38:25,108	01:38:28,737	International businessman... Overweight but cute...	International businessman... Overweight but cute...
2407	01:38:28,820	01:38:30,864	Needs executive secretary.	Needs executive secretary.
2408	01:38:30,906	01:38:33,283	Fringe benefits include extensive travel...	Fringe benefits include extensive travel...
2409	01:38:33,366	01:38:34,868	large wardrobe allowance...	large wardrobe allowance...
2410	01:38:34,951	01:38:37,037	liberal retirement plan...	liberal retirement plan...
2411	01:38:37,078	01:38:38,038	I take the job.	I take the job.
2412	01:38:38,079	01:38:39,039	You've got it.	You've got it.
2413	01:38:39,080	01:38:41,041	Good-bye. Good luck.	Good-bye. Good luck.
2414	01:38:41,082	01:38:42,667	And what about that call to Templehof?	And what about that call to Templehof?
2415	01:38:42,709	01:38:44,628	Oh, the plane will be ten minutes early.	Oh, the plane will be ten minutes early.
2416	01:38:44,711	01:38:45,670	10 minutes early?	10 minutes early?
2417	01:38:45,712	01:38:47,714	That's a hell of a way to run an airline.	That's a hell of a way to run an airline.
2418	01:38:47,797	01:38:49,716	Planes are supposed to be late, not early.	Planes are supposed to be late, not early.
2419	01:38:52,052	01:38:55,055	Oh, I never want to see him again.	Oh, I never want to see him again.
2420	01:38:55,138	01:38:56,806	I never want to speak to him.	I never want to speak to him.
2421	01:38:57,933	01:38:59,225	I want a divorce.	I want a divorce.
2422	01:38:59,309	01:39:00,685	What's the matter now?	What's the matter now?
2423	01:39:00,769	01:39:02,354	He doesn't want the baby.	He doesn't want the baby.
2424	01:39:02,437	01:39:04,356	He says nobody should bring children...	He says nobody should bring children...
2425	01:39:04,439	01:39:05,607	into a world like this.	into a world like this.
2426	01:39:05,690	01:39:06,608	That miserable punk.	That miserable punk.
2427	01:39:06,691	01:39:08,818	Why didn't he think of that before?	Why didn't he think of that before?
2428	01:39:08,860	01:39:10,362	After all I've gone through.	After all I've gone through.
2429	01:39:10,403	01:39:11,363	Where is he?	Where is he?
2430	01:39:11,404	01:39:13,823	I'm sorry, darling. I didn't mean it.	I'm sorry, darling. I didn't mean it.
2431	01:39:13,865	01:39:16,117	Of course we're going to have the baby.	Of course we're going to have the baby.
2432	01:39:16,201	01:39:17,953	I love you.	I love you.
2433	01:39:18,036	01:39:20,288	Don't ever scare me like that again.	Don't ever scare me like that again.
2434	01:39:21,289	01:39:24,542	Maybe our children can make this a better place to live in...	Maybe our children can make this a better place to live in...
2435	01:39:24,584	01:39:26,920	a world where men are created equal...	a world where men are created equal...
2436	01:39:27,045	01:39:29,798	and there's liberty and... and justice for all.	and there's liberty and... and justice for all.
2437	01:39:29,881	01:39:30,799	Congratulations.	Congratulations.
2438	01:39:30,882	01:39:32,300	You just quoted Thomas Jefferson...	You just quoted Thomas Jefferson...
2439	01:39:32,384	01:39:33,385	Abraham Lincoln...	Abraham Lincoln...
2440	01:39:33,468	01:39:35,470	and the Pledge of Allegiance to the Flag.	and the Pledge of Allegiance to the Flag.
2441	01:39:35,553	01:39:36,805	I what?	I what?
2442	01:39:39,349	01:39:41,518	Come on. Let's get going.	Come on. Let's get going.
2443	01:39:49,109	01:39:50,360	I take it into the other room and fix it.	I take it into the other room and fix it.
2444	01:39:50,443	01:39:52,028	We haven't got time. Come with us.	We haven't got time. Come with us.
2445	01:39:53,863	01:39:55,490	Schlemmer!	Schlemmer!
2446	01:39:55,532	01:39:57,117	Sitzen machen.	Sitzen machen.
2447	01:39:59,577	01:40:00,537	Blumen.	Blumen.
2448	01:40:00,578	01:40:03,289	Here. This is for your mother-in-law.	Here. This is for your mother-in-law.
2449	01:40:16,052	01:40:17,637	Hutte.	Hutte.
2450	01:40:22,434	01:40:25,437	Oh, in front. You, paint from the inside.	Oh, in front. You, paint from the inside.
2451	01:40:27,188	01:40:29,315	Quick, to the airport. Eins, zwei, drei.	Quick, to the airport. Eins, zwei, drei.
2452	01:40:36,740	01:40:40,160	All right! Watch that umbrella.	All right! Watch that umbrella.
2453	01:40:40,201	01:40:41,619	No, I don't like it.	No, I don't like it.
2454	01:40:41,703	01:40:43,705	Here. You need some stuff for your pockets.	Here. You need some stuff for your pockets.
2455	01:40:43,747	01:40:46,791	Money, cigarette case...	Money, cigarette case...
2456	01:40:46,875	01:40:49,335	lighter, picture of the castle.	lighter, picture of the castle.
2457	01:40:49,377	01:40:51,087	Try this one, darling.	Try this one, darling.
2458	01:40:51,171	01:40:53,465	You'd better take my wristwatch, too.	You'd better take my wristwatch, too.
2459	01:40:55,467	01:40:56,468	Oh, that's my wrist.	Oh, that's my wrist.
2460	01:40:56,551	01:40:57,719	Oh.	Oh.
2461	01:40:57,802	01:40:59,011	You know, darling, I don't think...	You know, darling, I don't think...
2462	01:40:59,012	01:41:00,472	you were meant to wear a hat.	you were meant to wear a hat.
2463	01:41:00,555	01:41:03,349	I wasn't meant to be a count, either.	I wasn't meant to be a count, either.
2464	01:41:03,433	01:41:05,268	This is ridiculous. Who's going to believe it?	This is ridiculous. Who's going to believe it?
2465	01:41:05,351	01:41:06,269	Calm down.	Calm down.
2466	01:41:06,352	01:41:07,812	The only royalty we know in America...	The only royalty we know in America...
2467	01:41:07,854	01:41:11,107	is Nat King Cole, Duke Snyder, and Earl Wilson.	is Nat King Cole, Duke Snyder, and Earl Wilson.
2468	01:41:23,870	01:41:25,747	- Ouch! - Oh, pardon.	- Ouch! - Oh, pardon.
2469	01:41:29,292	01:41:31,211	Please, Liebchen, not that. Anything but that.	Please, Liebchen, not that. Anything but that.
2470	01:41:31,294	01:41:33,588	All right. Let's see if we have a black bowler.	All right. Let's see if we have a black bowler.
2471	01:41:33,671	01:41:34,589	Bowler, bowler.	Bowler, bowler.
2472	01:41:34,672	01:41:35,715	Here's a list of what you owe me.	Here's a list of what you owe me.
2473	01:41:35,799	01:41:37,050	- Owe you? - All itemized.	- Owe you? - All itemized.
2474	01:41:37,175	01:41:39,010	MERCEDES LIMOUSINE: Twenty thousand marks.	MERCEDES LIMOUSINE: Twenty thousand marks.
2475	01:41:39,052	01:41:40,678	COST OF ADOPTION: Forty-five hundred marks.	COST OF ADOPTION: Forty-five hundred marks.
2476	01:41:40,720	01:41:42,806	Suits, haberdashery, shoes, ET CETERA, ET CETERA:	Suits, haberdashery, shoes, ET CETERA, ET CETERA:
2477	01:41:42,889	01:41:44,224	12,800 marks.	12,800 marks.
2478	01:41:44,307	01:41:46,893	Luggage, flowers, 7-COURSE DINNER: 925 marks.	Luggage, flowers, 7-COURSE DINNER: 925 marks.
2479	01:41:46,976	01:41:48,686	HAIRCUT AND MANICURE: Fourteen marks.	HAIRCUT AND MANICURE: Fourteen marks.
2480	01:41:48,728	01:41:50,355	TIPS: Six marks.	TIPS: Six marks.
2481	01:41:50,396	01:41:51,481	I'm a very large tipper.	I'm a very large tipper.
2482	01:41:51,523	01:41:54,359	Wristwatch, cigarette case, LIGHTER WITH FLUID: 2,200 marks.	Wristwatch, cigarette case, LIGHTER WITH FLUID: 2,200 marks.
2483	01:41:54,442	01:41:56,194	LOOSE CHANGE: 475 marks.	LOOSE CHANGE: 475 marks.
2484	01:41:56,277	01:42:00,448	TOTAL: 41,020 marks, or $10,255.	TOTAL: 41,020 marks, or $10,255.
2485	01:42:00,532	01:42:02,534	You mean I have been a capitalist for three hours...	You mean I have been a capitalist for three hours...
2486	01:42:02,617	01:42:03,868	and already I owe $10,000?	and already I owe $10,000?
2487	01:42:03,910	01:42:05,078	That's what makes our system work.	That's what makes our system work.
2488	01:42:05,203	01:42:06,704	Everybody owes everybody.	Everybody owes everybody.
2489	01:42:06,746	01:42:08,373	That's the one!	That's the one!
2490	01:42:09,207	01:42:11,209	Doesn't it look distinguished?	Doesn't it look distinguished?
2491	01:42:11,835	01:42:13,002	Not bad.	Not bad.
2492	01:42:14,045	01:42:16,172	11:46. Faster, Fritz!	11:46. Faster, Fritz!
2493	01:42:20,802	01:42:22,804	Now, before you meet Daddy, I'd better warn you...	Now, before you meet Daddy, I'd better warn you...
2494	01:42:22,887	01:42:24,889	There are certain things he feels very strongly about.	There are certain things he feels very strongly about.
2495	01:42:24,973	01:42:25,890	One is the Civil War.	One is the Civil War.
2496	01:42:25,974	01:42:27,016	Civil War?	Civil War?
2497	01:42:27,100	01:42:29,018	If the subject comes up, just say it was a draw.	If the subject comes up, just say it was a draw.
2498	01:42:29,060	01:42:30,019	Another is Coca-Cola.	Another is Coca-Cola.
2499	01:42:30,061	01:42:31,688	Tell him we must look beyond the six-pack.	Tell him we must look beyond the six-pack.
2500	01:42:31,729	01:42:33,356	Why not a nine-pack or a twelve-pack?	Why not a nine-pack or a twelve-pack?
2501	01:42:33,439	01:42:34,566	Then there's golf.	Then there's golf.
2502	01:42:34,649	01:42:36,693	GOLF: The family that plays together stays together.	GOLF: The family that plays together stays together.
2503	01:42:36,734	01:42:38,069	And the world situation...	And the world situation...
2504	01:42:38,153	01:42:39,070	It's serious, but not hopeless.	It's serious, but not hopeless.
2505	01:42:39,154	01:42:40,530	And vivisection.	And vivisection.
2506	01:42:40,572	01:42:41,698	It shouldn't happen to a dog.	It shouldn't happen to a dog.
2507	01:42:41,739	01:42:43,366	And Red China and income taxes...	And Red China and income taxes...
2508	01:42:43,408	01:42:44,701	and Tennessee Williams.	and Tennessee Williams.
2509	01:42:44,784	01:42:46,786	Wait! Stop the car. It's no use.	Wait! Stop the car. It's no use.
2510	01:42:46,870	01:42:48,079	I can't remember all that.	I can't remember all that.
2511	01:42:48,121	01:42:50,081	Darling, you can't give up now.	Darling, you can't give up now.
2512	01:42:50,123	01:42:51,082	Maybe we'll get lucky.	Maybe we'll get lucky.
2513	01:42:51,124	01:42:53,209	Maybe somebody hijacked the plane.	Maybe somebody hijacked the plane.
2514	01:43:07,223	01:43:09,726	Now, honey, you let me handle this young man.	Now, honey, you let me handle this young man.
2515	01:43:09,809	01:43:11,603	It'll take me just thirty seconds to find out...	It'll take me just thirty seconds to find out...
2516	01:43:11,686	01:43:13,062	if he's one of those fortune hunters...	if he's one of those fortune hunters...
2517	01:43:13,146	01:43:14,480	or some kind of a crackpot.	or some kind of a crackpot.
2518	01:43:14,522	01:43:15,857	Oh, dear. I hope not.	Oh, dear. I hope not.
2519	01:43:15,899	01:43:17,483	You don't know these Europeans.	You don't know these Europeans.
2520	01:43:17,525	01:43:20,028	My poor honey child.	My poor honey child.
2521	01:43:20,069	01:43:22,280	Where are they anyway?	Where are they anyway?
2522	01:43:38,463	01:43:40,715	Tear them again, and I'll tear you apart.	Tear them again, and I'll tear you apart.
2523	01:43:46,763	01:43:48,264	Scarlett!	Scarlett!
2524	01:43:56,481	01:43:57,398	Mother!	Mother!
2525	01:43:57,482	01:43:58,983	Oh, let me look at you.	Oh, let me look at you.
2526	01:43:59,025	01:44:00,818	Dad. Oh.	Dad. Oh.
2527	01:44:00,860	01:44:02,779	All right. Now, where is he?	All right. Now, where is he?
2528	01:44:02,862	01:44:04,530	Over here.	Over here.
2529	01:44:07,283	01:44:08,910	I want you to meet my husband Otto.	I want you to meet my husband Otto.
2530	01:44:08,993	01:44:10,453	The Count von Droste-Schattenburg.	The Count von Droste-Schattenburg.
2531	01:44:10,536	01:44:11,454	Count von what?	Count von what?
2532	01:44:11,537	01:44:12,455	This is my mother.	This is my mother.
2533	01:44:12,538	01:44:14,749	Your highness.	Your highness.
2534	01:44:14,832	01:44:16,751	Please, not in the immediate family.	Please, not in the immediate family.
2535	01:44:17,752	01:44:19,712	Oh, one of those... a hand-kisser.	Oh, one of those... a hand-kisser.
2536	01:44:19,796	01:44:21,047	And this is my father.	And this is my father.
2537	01:44:21,130	01:44:22,548	Hello, Dad. How's your golf?	Hello, Dad. How's your golf?
2538	01:44:22,632	01:44:24,217	I always say, the family that plays together...	I always say, the family that plays together...
2539	01:44:24,300	01:44:25,385	Never mind that.	Never mind that.
2540	01:44:25,468	01:44:27,178	There are a few questions I want to ask you.	There are a few questions I want to ask you.
2541	01:44:27,220	01:44:29,222	Don't worry. If it's a boy, we'll name him after you.	Don't worry. If it's a boy, we'll name him after you.
2542	01:44:29,305	01:44:31,182	Wendell P. Von Droste-Schattenburg.	Wendell P. Von Droste-Schattenburg.
2543	01:44:31,266	01:44:32,183	Von Droste what?	Von Droste what?
2544	01:44:32,267	01:44:33,393	We have to be very careful...	We have to be very careful...
2545	01:44:33,476	01:44:34,644	when we change the baby's diapers.	when we change the baby's diapers.
2546	01:44:34,686	01:44:36,187	Otto comes from a long line of bleeders.	Otto comes from a long line of bleeders.
2547	01:44:36,271	01:44:37,522	Oh, isn't that nice?	Oh, isn't that nice?
2548	01:44:37,605	01:44:39,232	I always wanted Scarlett to be married...	I always wanted Scarlett to be married...
2549	01:44:39,315	01:44:41,109	to a long line of something.	to a long line of something.
2550	01:44:41,192	01:44:43,236	Now, MacNamara, tell me about this young man.	Now, MacNamara, tell me about this young man.
2551	01:44:43,319	01:44:44,696	Who is he, and what does he do...	Who is he, and what does he do...
2552	01:44:44,779	01:44:46,030	besides slobber over women's hands?	besides slobber over women's hands?
2553	01:44:46,072	01:44:48,199	Don't let that title fool you. He works for a living.	Don't let that title fool you. He works for a living.
2554	01:44:48,283	01:44:49,367	Doing what?	Doing what?
2555	01:44:49,450	01:44:51,536	As a matter of fact, he's head of our bottling plant.	As a matter of fact, he's head of our bottling plant.
2556	01:44:51,619	01:44:52,537	He works for us?	He works for us?
2557	01:44:52,620	01:44:54,372	Best man I ever had. Graduate engineer.	Best man I ever had. Graduate engineer.
2558	01:44:54,455	01:44:55,373	Took a lot of finagling...	Took a lot of finagling...
2559	01:44:55,456	01:44:56,874	to get him away from our competitors.	to get him away from our competitors.
2560	01:44:56,958	01:44:58,668	You don't say.	You don't say.
2561	01:44:59,419	01:45:01,629	Now, this is a picture of the family castle.	Now, this is a picture of the family castle.
2562	01:45:02,630	01:45:04,257	And this is my party membership... oops.	And this is my party membership... oops.
2563	01:45:04,340	01:45:05,258	Wrong party.	Wrong party.
2564	01:45:05,341	01:45:07,260	And here's the family crest.	And here's the family crest.
2565	01:45:07,343	01:45:08,845	Oh! Well, you'll have to put that...	Oh! Well, you'll have to put that...
2566	01:45:08,886	01:45:11,389	on all your stationery and your silverware...	on all your stationery and your silverware...
2567	01:45:11,472	01:45:12,390	and your underwear...	and your underwear...
2568	01:45:12,473	01:45:14,684	Well, son, glad to have you on the team.	Well, son, glad to have you on the team.
2569	01:45:14,767	01:45:16,519	I suppose you two met in the bottling plant.	I suppose you two met in the bottling plant.
2570	01:45:16,602	01:45:17,895	Oh, no. We met in a parade.	Oh, no. We met in a parade.
2571	01:45:17,979	01:45:19,314	He was carrying a picture of Khrushchev.	He was carrying a picture of Khrushchev.
2572	01:45:19,355	01:45:20,315	Khrushchev?	Khrushchev?
2573	01:45:20,356	01:45:22,984	Yes, with a big slogan on it... "Russki go home!"	Yes, with a big slogan on it... "Russki go home!"
2574	01:45:23,026	01:45:24,569	They threw him in jail for it.	They threw him in jail for it.
2575	01:45:24,652	01:45:25,570	My poor boy.	My poor boy.
2576	01:45:25,653	01:45:27,030	How is the situation here in Berlin?	How is the situation here in Berlin?
2577	01:45:27,113	01:45:29,157	It shouldn't happen to a dog.	It shouldn't happen to a dog.
2578	01:45:29,198	01:45:31,034	I mean it's a draw.	I mean it's a draw.
2579	01:45:31,075	01:45:35,038	Actually, the situation is hopeless but not serious.	Actually, the situation is hopeless but not serious.
2580	01:45:35,121	01:45:36,873	Hopeless but not...	Hopeless but not...
2581	01:45:36,914	01:45:39,375	Say, the boy's got a head on his shoulders.	Say, the boy's got a head on his shoulders.
2582	01:45:39,459	01:45:40,668	What did I tell you?	What did I tell you?
2583	01:45:40,710	01:45:43,212	May I have those? Fritz...	May I have those? Fritz...
2584	01:45:45,006	01:45:46,215	Next. Schlemmer!	Next. Schlemmer!
2585	01:45:46,299	01:45:48,384	Take these to passport control. One, two, three.	Take these to passport control. One, two, three.
2586	01:45:48,468	01:45:49,385	Yes, sir.	Yes, sir.
2587	01:45:49,469	01:45:50,970	Next! Mom, Dad...	Next! Mom, Dad...
2588	01:45:51,054	01:45:52,388	I'm giving a little banquet tonight...	I'm giving a little banquet tonight...
2589	01:45:52,472	01:45:54,349	Un petit dîner en famille.	Un petit dîner en famille.
2590	01:45:54,432	01:45:55,683	Oh, he speaks French, too.	Oh, he speaks French, too.
2591	01:45:55,767	01:45:57,185	- And Russian. - Russian?	- And Russian. - Russian?
2592	01:45:57,268	01:45:58,269	White Russian, of course.	White Russian, of course.
2593	01:45:58,353	01:45:59,270	Oh.	Oh.
2594	01:45:59,354	01:46:00,688	Now, Dad, there are a few ideas...	Now, Dad, there are a few ideas...
2595	01:46:00,772	01:46:02,190	I'd like to kick around with you.	I'd like to kick around with you.
2596	01:46:02,273	01:46:03,816	Now, we must look beyond the six-pack.	Now, we must look beyond the six-pack.
2597	01:46:03,858	01:46:06,527	Why not a nine-pack or a twelve-pack?	Why not a nine-pack or a twelve-pack?
2598	01:46:06,611	01:46:09,155	Pan American Flight 17 to New York...	Pan American Flight 17 to New York...
2599	01:46:09,197	01:46:12,742	via Frankfurt now boarding at Gate Five.	via Frankfurt now boarding at Gate Five.
2600	01:46:21,959	01:46:22,877	Phyllis!	Phyllis!
2601	01:46:22,960	01:46:25,338	Mac! You came through 100%.	Mac! You came through 100%.
2602	01:46:25,421	01:46:26,339	I did what I could.	I did what I could.
2603	01:46:26,422	01:46:27,548	Now I'm sure I found the right man...	Now I'm sure I found the right man...
2604	01:46:27,632	01:46:28,716	for the London job.	for the London job.
2605	01:46:28,800	01:46:29,884	Thanks, Mr. Hazeltine.	Thanks, Mr. Hazeltine.
2606	01:46:29,967	01:46:31,052	It's just what we need...	It's just what we need...
2607	01:46:31,135	01:46:32,220	Somebody who's a good organizer...	Somebody who's a good organizer...
2608	01:46:32,303	01:46:33,721	has a lot of drive, knows the business...	has a lot of drive, knows the business...
2609	01:46:33,805	01:46:34,722	speaks several languages.	speaks several languages.
2610	01:46:34,806	01:46:36,182	Well, I studied every chance I had.	Well, I studied every chance I had.
2611	01:46:36,265	01:46:37,350	Yes, sir.	Yes, sir.
2612	01:46:37,392	01:46:38,643	Absolutely the ideal man for this position.	Absolutely the ideal man for this position.
2613	01:46:38,684	01:46:41,521	And I'm not just saying that because he's my son-in-law.	And I'm not just saying that because he's my son-in-law.
2614	01:46:42,271	01:46:43,189	How's that?	How's that?
2615	01:46:43,272	01:46:45,233	It's not going to hurt our prestige any.	It's not going to hurt our prestige any.
2616	01:46:45,316	01:46:46,401	Head of European operations...	Head of European operations...
2617	01:46:46,484	01:46:48,861	Count Otto von Droste-Schattenburg.	Count Otto von Droste-Schattenburg.
2618	01:46:48,903	01:46:49,946	Oh, that's how it is.	Oh, that's how it is.
2619	01:46:50,029	01:46:51,864	As for you, Mac, you haven't been forgotten.	As for you, Mac, you haven't been forgotten.
2620	01:46:51,948	01:46:53,699	You're going all the way to the top now.	You're going all the way to the top now.
2621	01:46:53,783	01:46:55,201	There's an opening in the home office...	There's an opening in the home office...
2622	01:46:55,243	01:46:56,994	vice president in charge of procurement...	vice president in charge of procurement...
2623	01:46:57,036	01:46:58,037	and it is all yours.	and it is all yours.
2624	01:46:58,079	01:46:59,372	Why are you so good to me?	Why are you so good to me?
2625	01:46:59,497	01:47:01,624	I know you must be dying to get back to Atlanta.	I know you must be dying to get back to Atlanta.
2626	01:47:01,707	01:47:03,167	Dying is right.	Dying is right.
2627	01:47:03,209	01:47:06,087	Here you are, Count. I won't be needing this anymore.	Here you are, Count. I won't be needing this anymore.
2628	01:47:06,170	01:47:07,213	Thank you, old chap.	Thank you, old chap.
2629	01:47:07,296	01:47:08,214	Bye, Countess.	Bye, Countess.
2630	01:47:08,297	01:47:11,759	Mr. MacNamara, I simply adore you.	Mr. MacNamara, I simply adore you.
2631	01:47:12,301	01:47:13,386	Will you write to us?	Will you write to us?
2632	01:47:13,469	01:47:14,470	Better than that.	Better than that.
2633	01:47:14,554	01:47:15,888	I'll send you some silver-plated sauerkraut...	I'll send you some silver-plated sauerkraut...
2634	01:47:15,930	01:47:17,473	for Christmas.	for Christmas.
2635	01:47:24,772	01:47:25,857	Mom, can we have a Coke?	Mom, can we have a Coke?
2636	01:47:25,940	01:47:28,568	You can have one on the plane. I don't have any change.	You can have one on the plane. I don't have any change.
2637	01:47:28,651	01:47:30,528	- I've got change. - Mac!	- I've got change. - Mac!
2638	01:47:30,611	01:47:32,655	Very nice of you to come down here to see me off.	Very nice of you to come down here to see me off.
2639	01:47:34,866	01:47:35,908	Where are you going?	Where are you going?
2640	01:47:35,992	01:47:36,909	Back to the States.	Back to the States.
2641	01:47:36,993	01:47:39,328	Funny, that's where we're going.	Funny, that's where we're going.
2642	01:47:39,370	01:47:41,205	I thought I'd take Flight 17 to New York.	I thought I'd take Flight 17 to New York.
2643	01:47:41,289	01:47:43,124	From there I can hop a freedom bus to Atlanta.	From there I can hop a freedom bus to Atlanta.
2644	01:47:43,207	01:47:44,125	- Atlanta? - Yeah.	- Atlanta? - Yeah.
2645	01:47:44,208	01:47:47,253	I'm the new vice president in charge of bottle caps.	I'm the new vice president in charge of bottle caps.
2646	01:47:47,336	01:47:49,088	They're kicking me upstairs.	They're kicking me upstairs.
2647	01:47:49,172	01:47:50,715	That's something I've always wanted to do myself.	That's something I've always wanted to do myself.
2648	01:47:50,798	01:47:52,925	So anytime you and the kids would care to join me...	So anytime you and the kids would care to join me...
2649	01:47:53,009	01:47:54,510	I'll be waiting for you.	I'll be waiting for you.
2650	01:47:54,552	01:47:56,762	Just a minute. Conference.	Just a minute. Conference.
2651	01:47:59,682	01:48:01,684	Two out of three. Deal is on.	Two out of three. Deal is on.
2652	01:48:01,726	01:48:03,019	Two out of three?	Two out of three?
2653	01:48:03,060	01:48:05,521	All right. Who's the wise guy?	All right. Who's the wise guy?
2654	01:48:15,031	01:48:16,699	Schlemmer!	Schlemmer!