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# | Start | End | Original | Translated |
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1 | 00:00:08,926 | 00:00:10,593 | Grand Canyon ain't nothin'. | Grand Canyon ain't nothin'. |
2 | 00:00:11,637 | 00:00:17,141 | Being a grandfather or a father now that's harder than being the Grand Canyon. | Being a grandfather or a father now that's harder than being the Grand Canyon. |
3 | 00:00:18,102 | 00:00:20,770 | lt's just a hole sitting there doing nothing. | lt's just a hole sitting there doing nothing. |
4 | 00:00:21,230 | 00:00:24,607 | Okay, but are you even okay without havin' a Grand Canyon? | Okay, but are you even okay without havin' a Grand Canyon? |
5 | 00:00:25,067 | 00:00:30,279 | Or should we just kick some sand up all over it and fill it up like a cat box? | Or should we just kick some sand up all over it and fill it up like a cat box? |
6 | 00:00:30,364 | 00:00:31,364 | Shit. | Shit. |
7 | 00:00:31,699 | 00:00:35,868 | All l'm sayin' is the Grand Canyon is | All l'm sayin' is the Grand Canyon is |
8 | 00:00:35,953 | 00:00:38,788 | where Joe was left that very day. | where Joe was left that very day. |
9 | 00:00:38,872 | 00:00:41,791 | Yo Ebony lvory? You talkin' about Joe Dirt? | Yo Ebony lvory? You talkin' about Joe Dirt? |
10 | 00:00:41,875 | 00:00:44,210 | -Yeah. -l know a little something about Joe Dirt. | -Yeah. -l know a little something about Joe Dirt. |
11 | 00:00:45,129 | 00:00:48,172 | Stopped into an old radio station l worked a few years back. | Stopped into an old radio station l worked a few years back. |
12 | 00:00:48,257 | 00:00:51,050 | Stayed for it must have been a week. | Stayed for it must have been a week. |
13 | 00:00:51,343 | 00:00:54,345 | Wove some bat-shit crazy tale. | Wove some bat-shit crazy tale. |
14 | 00:00:54,555 | 00:00:58,349 | So bat-shit he should have hung upside down from the ceiling when he was telling it. | So bat-shit he should have hung upside down from the ceiling when he was telling it. |
15 | 00:00:58,600 | 00:01:01,936 | l remember a big kid bigger heart. | l remember a big kid bigger heart. |
16 | 00:01:02,146 | 00:01:05,606 | Sure you know l'm not saying the lQ wasn't subterranean. | Sure you know l'm not saying the lQ wasn't subterranean. |
17 | 00:01:05,816 | 00:01:09,193 | l mean that intellect was barely skimming the treetops. | l mean that intellect was barely skimming the treetops. |
18 | 00:01:10,070 | 00:01:12,697 | Now l ain't saying that l ain't in "agree-ence" with you. | Now l ain't saying that l ain't in "agree-ence" with you. |
19 | 00:01:12,990 | 00:01:17,535 | But somewhere in thereʼ the speechifying you makingʼ | But somewhere in thereʼ the speechifying you makingʼ |
20 | 00:01:17,619 | 00:01:19,078 | it just ain't sounded right. | it just ain't sounded right. |
21 | 00:01:19,163 | 00:01:21,372 | Hey John C-minus Reilly. | Hey John C-minus Reilly. |
22 | 00:01:21,999 | 00:01:24,709 | lt's not "agree-ence" it's "agreematude". | lt's not "agree-ence" it's "agreematude". |
23 | 00:01:24,877 | 00:01:27,670 | And by the way what's with the mouth for God's sakes? | And by the way what's with the mouth for God's sakes? |
24 | 00:01:27,838 | 00:01:31,549 | The teeth look like a half-completed Lego project. | The teeth look like a half-completed Lego project. |
25 | 00:01:31,675 | 00:01:33,843 | What are you gargling with M-80s? | What are you gargling with M-80s? |
26 | 00:01:33,927 | 00:01:37,513 | Are those deciduous teeth? l'm waiting for them to change color fall out | Are those deciduous teeth? l'm waiting for them to change color fall out |
27 | 00:01:37,598 | 00:01:41,559 | and float down to the Grand. Who's your orthodontist Moe Howard with | and float down to the Grand. Who's your orthodontist Moe Howard with |
28 | 00:01:41,643 | 00:01:43,060 | a ball-peen hammer? | a ball-peen hammer? |
29 | 00:01:43,145 | 00:01:47,273 | l mean for God's sakes man. lt looks like Willie Stargell took a bat to your mouth. | l mean for God's sakes man. lt looks like Willie Stargell took a bat to your mouth. |
30 | 00:01:49,860 | 00:01:52,779 | Now listen JD has got himself in another bind here. | Now listen JD has got himself in another bind here. |
31 | 00:01:52,863 | 00:01:57,200 | But why not let the boy tell ya his own taleʼ in his own way? | But why not let the boy tell ya his own taleʼ in his own way? |
32 | 00:01:57,284 | 00:01:58,993 | Let's drop that needle guys. | Let's drop that needle guys. |
33 | 00:02:05,876 | 00:02:07,835 | Whoa whoa whoa. Wait a second. | Whoa whoa whoa. Wait a second. |
34 | 00:02:08,253 | 00:02:11,756 | That's a sweet song l get the thematicsʼ but this is Joe Dirt. | That's a sweet song l get the thematicsʼ but this is Joe Dirt. |
35 | 00:02:11,965 | 00:02:16,344 | We're gonna start this puppy offʼ we gotta go old school. Try it again guys. | We're gonna start this puppy offʼ we gotta go old school. Try it again guys. |
36 | 00:03:02,683 | 00:03:03,975 | Hello. | Hello. |
37 | 00:03:05,269 | 00:03:08,020 | l'm Dirt. l'm Joe Dirt. | l'm Dirt. l'm Joe Dirt. |
38 | 00:03:10,607 | 00:03:13,734 | Those look like pretty comfortable shoes you got on there. | Those look like pretty comfortable shoes you got on there. |
39 | 00:03:14,278 | 00:03:18,447 | My boots don't feel so good but they're like magical or something. | My boots don't feel so good but they're like magical or something. |
40 | 00:03:19,324 | 00:03:22,243 | Look cracker don't you be talking no Forrest Gump | Look cracker don't you be talking no Forrest Gump |
41 | 00:03:22,327 | 00:03:24,912 | crap to me you little bitch waffle. | crap to me you little bitch waffle. |
42 | 00:03:25,038 | 00:03:29,083 | Sittin' there talkin' all that honky-ass whiney crap likeʼ | Sittin' there talkin' all that honky-ass whiney crap likeʼ |
43 | 00:03:29,167 | 00:03:32,753 | "Mama said life is like a box of chocolates." | "Mama said life is like a box of chocolates." |
44 | 00:03:32,921 | 00:03:34,255 | Boy sittin' next to you for even | Boy sittin' next to you for even |
45 | 00:03:34,339 | 00:03:38,509 | ten seconds makes me feel like l should take a shower in a bath full of Clorox. | ten seconds makes me feel like l should take a shower in a bath full of Clorox. |
46 | 00:03:38,886 | 00:03:40,219 | Shit. | Shit. |
47 | 00:03:40,971 | 00:03:42,305 | Mullet head. | Mullet head. |
48 | 00:03:49,897 | 00:03:54,233 | lf l said "hi" to you you're not going to call me like a dumb crap Forrest Gump | lf l said "hi" to you you're not going to call me like a dumb crap Forrest Gump |
49 | 00:03:54,318 | 00:03:55,651 | or something will you? | or something will you? |
50 | 00:03:56,111 | 00:03:59,906 | Well let's play it by ear. | Well let's play it by ear. |
51 | 00:04:00,157 | 00:04:02,617 | Are you waiting on the seven cross-town bus? | Are you waiting on the seven cross-town bus? |
52 | 00:04:02,701 | 00:04:03,743 | Fair enough. | Fair enough. |
53 | 00:04:03,952 | 00:04:09,165 | No l'm just waitin' for the concert to be over over there. l tidy up after. | No l'm just waitin' for the concert to be over over there. l tidy up after. |
54 | 00:04:09,374 | 00:04:14,295 | -Tidy up? -Dirty yeah. l'm sort of you know a roadie. | -Tidy up? -Dirty yeah. l'm sort of you know a roadie. |
55 | 00:04:14,630 | 00:04:18,799 | You travel with the bands and you pack up their equipment after concerts | You travel with the bands and you pack up their equipment after concerts |
56 | 00:04:18,884 | 00:04:23,304 | -and their amplifiers and stuff? -Yeah exactly. But no not per se. | -and their amplifiers and stuff? -Yeah exactly. But no not per se. |
57 | 00:04:23,388 | 00:04:27,224 | l don't travel with them. Mostly l mop up after they're done. | l don't travel with them. Mostly l mop up after they're done. |
58 | 00:04:27,517 | 00:04:33,397 | Like l clean up the poop and the barf and things. And your occasional fart items. | Like l clean up the poop and the barf and things. And your occasional fart items. |
59 | 00:04:33,565 | 00:04:35,399 | And peepee you know whatnot. | And peepee you know whatnot. |
60 | 00:04:35,651 | 00:04:40,321 | So you don't actually travel with themʼ and such. Not a roadie. | So you don't actually travel with themʼ and such. Not a roadie. |
61 | 00:04:40,405 | 00:04:43,491 | No exactly. l don't know where that started yeah. | No exactly. l don't know where that started yeah. |
62 | 00:04:43,575 | 00:04:46,786 | -Now we're on the same page. -Why aren't you in thereʼ | -Now we're on the same page. -Why aren't you in thereʼ |
63 | 00:04:46,870 | 00:04:50,206 | -watching them perform? -Wellʼ | -watching them perform? -Wellʼ |
64 | 00:04:51,124 | 00:04:56,420 | l ain't exactly allowed in the building during the concerto if you will. | l ain't exactly allowed in the building during the concerto if you will. |
65 | 00:04:56,505 | 00:05:01,092 | But if there is a diarrhea emergency or something l get to go in and clean it up. | But if there is a diarrhea emergency or something l get to go in and clean it up. |
66 | 00:05:01,176 | 00:05:03,386 | And l can hear a little bit. So there are some perks. | And l can hear a little bit. So there are some perks. |
67 | 00:05:05,055 | 00:05:08,057 | l enjoy my job. 'Cause if people have a hard week and they wanna rock out | l enjoy my job. 'Cause if people have a hard week and they wanna rock out |
68 | 00:05:08,141 | 00:05:12,603 | at a concert l like to help you knowʼ picking up their garbage and bodily fluidsʼ | at a concert l like to help you knowʼ picking up their garbage and bodily fluidsʼ |
69 | 00:05:12,688 | 00:05:15,064 | just so they can relax. They can thank me later. | just so they can relax. They can thank me later. |
70 | 00:05:15,565 | 00:05:17,817 | They don't. But that's cool. | They don't. But that's cool. |
71 | 00:05:17,901 | 00:05:23,197 | lt don't stop me from being All ln All The Time. You know how it is yeah. | lt don't stop me from being All ln All The Time. You know how it is yeah. |
72 | 00:05:23,907 | 00:05:27,868 | So much has been happening to me that l don't even understand it all. | So much has been happening to me that l don't even understand it all. |
73 | 00:05:28,495 | 00:05:31,122 | lt's all just happening way above my pay grade. | lt's all just happening way above my pay grade. |
74 | 00:05:31,748 | 00:05:34,917 | Above zero? Just kidding. | Above zero? Just kidding. |
75 | 00:05:35,002 | 00:05:37,753 | -Sorry that was rude. -That's a good one. You got me. | -Sorry that was rude. -That's a good one. You got me. |
76 | 00:05:37,921 | 00:05:42,049 | That's pretty much how it is. Seeʼ my new story picks up after my first storyʼ | That's pretty much how it is. Seeʼ my new story picks up after my first storyʼ |
77 | 00:05:42,134 | 00:05:45,469 | and yet it goes back to the day l was born. | and yet it goes back to the day l was born. |
78 | 00:05:46,388 | 00:05:51,100 | Well you've got me intrigued. And l don't see the bus coming nearby so | Well you've got me intrigued. And l don't see the bus coming nearby so |
79 | 00:05:51,893 | 00:05:53,310 | start at the beginning. | start at the beginning. |
80 | 00:05:54,271 | 00:05:57,273 | lt starts where every good thing in my life ever got started. | lt starts where every good thing in my life ever got started. |
81 | 00:05:58,025 | 00:05:59,608 | Silvertown. | Silvertown. |
82 | 00:06:00,318 | 00:06:02,069 | Man that's the greatest town ever. | Man that's the greatest town ever. |
83 | 00:06:47,032 | 00:06:52,161 | And today was the best day ever. Man, l was marrying Brandy. | And today was the best day ever. Man, l was marrying Brandy. |
84 | 00:07:11,223 | 00:07:13,015 | Hey! Come here get down! | Hey! Come here get down! |
85 | 00:07:14,184 | 00:07:16,060 | It was like I was dreamin'. | It was like I was dreamin'. |
86 | 00:07:17,479 | 00:07:19,688 | Brandy knew me better than l knew myself. | Brandy knew me better than l knew myself. |
87 | 00:07:20,065 | 00:07:23,192 | Like, she knew that I didn't know what seven times seven was. | Like, she knew that I didn't know what seven times seven was. |
88 | 00:07:23,443 | 00:07:26,529 | l mean, yeah, now I know that it's 77, but still. | l mean, yeah, now I know that it's 77, but still. |
89 | 00:07:26,696 | 00:07:28,030 | She knew me. | She knew me. |
90 | 00:07:28,240 | 00:07:31,951 | And just when l thought it couldn't get any better, it did. | And just when l thought it couldn't get any better, it did. |
91 | 00:07:32,035 | 00:07:33,035 | Joe... | Joe... |
92 | 00:07:33,161 | 00:07:34,870 | We were gonna have a baby. | We were gonna have a baby. |
93 | 00:07:36,081 | 00:07:37,998 | Morning sickness came on fast. | Morning sickness came on fast. |
94 | 00:07:39,042 | 00:07:40,042 | Get it out. | Get it out. |
95 | 00:07:40,168 | 00:07:42,419 | But Brandy was a real trooper about it. | But Brandy was a real trooper about it. |
96 | 00:07:49,261 | 00:07:51,554 | And then the big day arrived. | And then the big day arrived. |
97 | 00:07:51,763 | 00:07:53,848 | Joe honey? How are you doing? | Joe honey? How are you doing? |
98 | 00:07:53,932 | 00:07:56,767 | Yeah yeah l'm doing good baby. l'm doing good. | Yeah yeah l'm doing good baby. l'm doing good. |
99 | 00:07:56,852 | 00:07:59,478 | Please make her smart like Brandy. Please make her smart like Brandy. | Please make her smart like Brandy. Please make her smart like Brandy. |
100 | 00:07:59,563 | 00:08:02,565 | -Don't make her dumb like me. -Joe? | -Don't make her dumb like me. -Joe? |
101 | 00:08:02,983 | 00:08:03,983 | What? | What? |
102 | 00:08:04,067 | 00:08:06,819 | l don't know what to do. Just tell me if there's something l need to help you with. | l don't know what to do. Just tell me if there's something l need to help you with. |
103 | 00:08:06,903 | 00:08:09,446 | -Honey honey breathe. Okay? -Yeah. | -Honey honey breathe. Okay? -Yeah. |
104 | 00:08:09,531 | 00:08:12,783 | -ln and out. That's it. -Oh man. | -ln and out. That's it. -Oh man. |
105 | 00:08:12,868 | 00:08:14,743 | We're gonna see our baby real soon. | We're gonna see our baby real soon. |
106 | 00:08:14,911 | 00:08:16,328 | l hope she looks like you. | l hope she looks like you. |
107 | 00:08:16,496 | 00:08:17,955 | Shut up! | Shut up! |
108 | 00:08:18,081 | 00:08:21,834 | l mean shut up because noʼ please she has to look like you baby. | l mean shut up because noʼ please she has to look like you baby. |
109 | 00:08:21,918 | 00:08:23,919 | Don't waste a favor. What if God listens? You can't... | Don't waste a favor. What if God listens? You can't... |
110 | 00:08:24,045 | 00:08:28,048 | You are the most handsomest man that l have ever seen. | You are the most handsomest man that l have ever seen. |
111 | 00:08:28,675 | 00:08:31,635 | Baby l think them drugs put your eyeballs to sleepʼ | Baby l think them drugs put your eyeballs to sleepʼ |
112 | 00:08:31,720 | 00:08:33,637 | because you don't know what you're saying. | because you don't know what you're saying. |
113 | 00:08:34,181 | 00:08:35,931 | All right let's take a look. | All right let's take a look. |
114 | 00:08:36,766 | 00:08:40,936 | Centimeter dilation looks just about right. | Centimeter dilation looks just about right. |
115 | 00:08:41,313 | 00:08:42,980 | Hey Doc are you smoking? | Hey Doc are you smoking? |
116 | 00:08:43,523 | 00:08:46,609 | Was it the cigarette that gave it away Sherlock? | Was it the cigarette that gave it away Sherlock? |
117 | 00:08:50,197 | 00:08:53,115 | -Doctor girl? -Mister may l call you Brandy? | -Doctor girl? -Mister may l call you Brandy? |
118 | 00:08:53,283 | 00:08:56,243 | Because l feel like once l've seen your muff we should be on a first name basis. | Because l feel like once l've seen your muff we should be on a first name basis. |
119 | 00:08:56,328 | 00:08:58,704 | Okay this exchange doesn't sound too "doctorish" to me. | Okay this exchange doesn't sound too "doctorish" to me. |
120 | 00:08:58,788 | 00:09:01,582 | How cool. Did you go to med school? | How cool. Did you go to med school? |
121 | 00:09:02,125 | 00:09:03,417 | No l did not. | No l did not. |
122 | 00:09:03,501 | 00:09:06,545 | So you don't know how doctors talk. l thought maybe you did | So you don't know how doctors talk. l thought maybe you did |
123 | 00:09:06,630 | 00:09:10,591 | the way you sounded all confident about our exchange not sounding doctor-like. | the way you sounded all confident about our exchange not sounding doctor-like. |
124 | 00:09:10,717 | 00:09:12,718 | My Joe went to the school of hard knocks | My Joe went to the school of hard knocks |
125 | 00:09:12,802 | 00:09:15,596 | but graduated with honors. Please treat him with respect. | but graduated with honors. Please treat him with respect. |
126 | 00:09:15,889 | 00:09:18,682 | That's nice Brandy ya always say the nicest stuff about me. | That's nice Brandy ya always say the nicest stuff about me. |
127 | 00:09:18,808 | 00:09:20,643 | Well l can't help myself baby. | Well l can't help myself baby. |
128 | 00:09:20,810 | 00:09:24,438 | Well well our little girl is crowning. You're about to meet your baby. | Well well our little girl is crowning. You're about to meet your baby. |
129 | 00:09:24,648 | 00:09:27,691 | -Hear that baby? -l love her so much already! | -Hear that baby? -l love her so much already! |
130 | 00:09:27,901 | 00:09:30,486 | Miss? Hold on a second. | Miss? Hold on a second. |
131 | 00:09:30,612 | 00:09:32,321 | Sue l think there's another baby up in there. | Sue l think there's another baby up in there. |
132 | 00:09:32,405 | 00:09:35,658 | -Did l hear there's probably another baby? -Hey we're in a meeting. | -Did l hear there's probably another baby? -Hey we're in a meeting. |
133 | 00:09:35,825 | 00:09:41,330 | Hey Doc l just wanna... Whoa. Jackpot! Give me some! | Hey Doc l just wanna... Whoa. Jackpot! Give me some! |
134 | 00:09:41,623 | 00:09:43,707 | -What? -lt's a medical term. | -What? -lt's a medical term. |
135 | 00:09:44,251 | 00:09:46,335 | lt's a medical term it don't sound like one. | lt's a medical term it don't sound like one. |
136 | 00:09:46,419 | 00:09:48,754 | Wow! Did you go to med school? | Wow! Did you go to med school? |
137 | 00:09:48,880 | 00:09:53,175 | -No we went over this earlier. -Hey Doc l do see another baby in there. | -No we went over this earlier. -Hey Doc l do see another baby in there. |
138 | 00:09:53,260 | 00:09:55,010 | Although l'm no baby expert. | Although l'm no baby expert. |
139 | 00:09:55,178 | 00:09:58,138 | -You ain't no expert? -l wanted to get in on this one as soon as | -You ain't no expert? -l wanted to get in on this one as soon as |
140 | 00:09:58,223 | 00:10:01,809 | l heard it was gonna be Brandy-Boo up here in these here stirrups. | l heard it was gonna be Brandy-Boo up here in these here stirrups. |
141 | 00:10:01,977 | 00:10:03,978 | -What's that? -Get out of here man. | -What's that? -Get out of here man. |
142 | 00:10:04,646 | 00:10:06,772 | What are you doing? Don't talk that way. | What are you doing? Don't talk that way. |
143 | 00:10:06,898 | 00:10:09,733 | -Oh shit. -What now? What's the matter? | -Oh shit. -What now? What's the matter? |
144 | 00:10:09,818 | 00:10:11,610 | -There's three up in there. -Three what? | -There's three up in there. -Three what? |
145 | 00:10:11,695 | 00:10:13,320 | Three babies dumbass. | Three babies dumbass. |
146 | 00:10:13,446 | 00:10:16,198 | -l told you. l told you. -Well l see them now. | -l told you. l told you. -Well l see them now. |
147 | 00:10:16,283 | 00:10:17,700 | Excuse me. | Excuse me. |
148 | 00:10:19,869 | 00:10:24,290 | Today is the day when these tiny little lives begin theirjourney | Today is the day when these tiny little lives begin theirjourney |
149 | 00:10:25,041 | 00:10:28,544 | that God willing will outlast everybody in this room. | that God willing will outlast everybody in this room. |
150 | 00:10:29,754 | 00:10:34,300 | Joe and l would appreciate it if you would show the proper reverence. | Joe and l would appreciate it if you would show the proper reverence. |
151 | 00:10:36,177 | 00:10:40,723 | Baby that's so good. She got the speeches down. That's poetry right there. | Baby that's so good. She got the speeches down. That's poetry right there. |
152 | 00:10:40,807 | 00:10:43,183 | You're my little MLK baby. | You're my little MLK baby. |
153 | 00:10:45,895 | 00:10:50,065 | This Brandy chick is pure gold. lnside and out. | This Brandy chick is pure gold. lnside and out. |
154 | 00:10:50,775 | 00:10:54,570 | A woman like that loving a man like him. l must have misjudged this fool. | A woman like that loving a man like him. l must have misjudged this fool. |
155 | 00:10:55,280 | 00:10:57,072 | What do you say we deliver these babies? | What do you say we deliver these babies? |
156 | 00:10:59,242 | 00:11:03,370 | Wow. Martin Scorsese couldn't compose a better shot. | Wow. Martin Scorsese couldn't compose a better shot. |
157 | 00:11:03,496 | 00:11:05,539 | What more could a guy ask for? | What more could a guy ask for? |
158 | 00:11:07,042 | 00:11:08,167 | That wasn't it. | That wasn't it. |
159 | 00:11:08,293 | 00:11:11,587 | Hey what did Brandy just say? Let's deliver us some babies. | Hey what did Brandy just say? Let's deliver us some babies. |
160 | 00:11:11,671 | 00:11:12,921 | You got it Joe Dirt. | You got it Joe Dirt. |
161 | 00:11:13,173 | 00:11:15,758 | Give us some room. Three babies comin' up. | Give us some room. Three babies comin' up. |
162 | 00:11:16,092 | 00:11:18,886 | -Push! Push! -You got this. Come on. You can do it! | -Push! Push! -You got this. Come on. You can do it! |
163 | 00:11:18,970 | 00:11:19,970 | Are they talking? | Are they talking? |
164 | 00:11:21,264 | 00:11:24,099 | Congratulations you have triplets! | Congratulations you have triplets! |
165 | 00:11:24,476 | 00:11:25,517 | What? | What? |
166 | 00:11:25,602 | 00:11:30,397 | Brandy you hear that? We got us a little NASCAR pit crew. l'm so happy. | Brandy you hear that? We got us a little NASCAR pit crew. l'm so happy. |
167 | 00:11:33,693 | 00:11:38,364 | Joe it's sweet that you wanna name them Brandy Junior Brandy Brandyʼ | Joe it's sweet that you wanna name them Brandy Junior Brandy Brandyʼ |
168 | 00:11:38,448 | 00:11:43,327 | and Brandy 2.0 the Special Editionʼ but they need real names. | and Brandy 2.0 the Special Editionʼ but they need real names. |
169 | 00:11:43,411 | 00:11:47,373 | You're right. You're the brains of the outfit. All right how about this l've been thinking | You're right. You're the brains of the outfit. All right how about this l've been thinking |
170 | 00:11:48,083 | 00:11:52,127 | -Def Lep Skynyrd and Seger. -Joe! Be serious. | -Def Lep Skynyrd and Seger. -Joe! Be serious. |
171 | 00:11:52,212 | 00:11:55,923 | l know. The Def Lep one is wrong. That's no good. All right how about this? | l know. The Def Lep one is wrong. That's no good. All right how about this? |
172 | 00:11:56,299 | 00:12:00,677 | 383 Magnum 440 Magnumʼ and 426 it's a Hemi. | 383 Magnum 440 Magnumʼ and 426 it's a Hemi. |
173 | 00:12:00,845 | 00:12:04,056 | lt's a Hemi. Everyone loves a Hemi. | lt's a Hemi. Everyone loves a Hemi. |
174 | 00:12:04,307 | 00:12:06,266 | Joe l am naming them. | Joe l am naming them. |
175 | 00:12:06,351 | 00:12:08,435 | All right you constructed themʼ you did all the work. | All right you constructed themʼ you did all the work. |
176 | 00:12:08,520 | 00:12:10,646 | You made 'em perfect and amazing. What do you got? | You made 'em perfect and amazing. What do you got? |
177 | 00:12:10,980 | 00:12:14,691 | Cheyenne Abilene and Dakota. | Cheyenne Abilene and Dakota. |
178 | 00:12:16,319 | 00:12:18,862 | So perfect. You're so good at thisʼ three for three. | So perfect. You're so good at thisʼ three for three. |
179 | 00:12:19,406 | 00:12:20,656 | -Yeah? -You did good. | -Yeah? -You did good. |
180 | 00:12:21,491 | 00:12:22,491 | Look at 'em. | Look at 'em. |
181 | 00:12:23,701 | 00:12:25,327 | So everything was good. | So everything was good. |
182 | 00:12:25,829 | 00:12:27,371 | Sure there were some bumps. | Sure there were some bumps. |
183 | 00:12:27,497 | 00:12:31,708 | Like this local guy, Jimmy Yauch. Man, he was worse than Robby. | Like this local guy, Jimmy Yauch. Man, he was worse than Robby. |
184 | 00:12:32,377 | 00:12:33,752 | What you doing over there? | What you doing over there? |
185 | 00:12:34,629 | 00:12:36,338 | Makes the smoke minty fresh. | Makes the smoke minty fresh. |
186 | 00:12:36,673 | 00:12:38,966 | What are you a scientist now? | What are you a scientist now? |
187 | 00:12:40,885 | 00:12:44,430 | No l drive a truck for Kipper's tow yard. l thought you knew that. | No l drive a truck for Kipper's tow yard. l thought you knew that. |
188 | 00:12:44,514 | 00:12:46,515 | And you suck what? l didn't hear that. | And you suck what? l didn't hear that. |
189 | 00:12:48,476 | 00:12:53,313 | First of all no and second who's feeding you all this false information? | First of all no and second who's feeding you all this false information? |
190 | 00:12:53,690 | 00:12:55,607 | Well that would be your mother son. | Well that would be your mother son. |
191 | 00:12:57,193 | 00:12:59,945 | l think you better stop. You better stop now. | l think you better stop. You better stop now. |
192 | 00:13:00,029 | 00:13:04,616 | 'Cause like Omar sayʼ "You come at the king you best not miss." | 'Cause like Omar sayʼ "You come at the king you best not miss." |
193 | 00:13:05,368 | 00:13:10,164 | -But l didn't come at you. -Anyways boys l been working on a song. | -But l didn't come at you. -Anyways boys l been working on a song. |
194 | 00:13:10,832 | 00:13:14,835 | About the hottest shorty boo that ever did walk the face of the Earth. | About the hottest shorty boo that ever did walk the face of the Earth. |
195 | 00:13:15,044 | 00:13:18,589 | And l'm telling you this right now. Brandy one day she will be mine. | And l'm telling you this right now. Brandy one day she will be mine. |
196 | 00:13:18,715 | 00:13:19,715 | Now this l swear. | Now this l swear. |
197 | 00:13:20,884 | 00:13:21,884 | Check this out. | Check this out. |
198 | 00:13:23,636 | 00:13:27,347 | l'm a son of a gun not a box of six-gun repeaters | l'm a son of a gun not a box of six-gun repeaters |
199 | 00:13:29,058 | 00:13:33,395 | I'm a backdoor man not just some Walmart greeter | I'm a backdoor man not just some Walmart greeter |
200 | 00:13:34,439 | 00:13:37,065 | l'm rocking a double five-five wiener | l'm rocking a double five-five wiener |
201 | 00:13:38,776 | 00:13:41,069 | Looking for Brandy's love meter | Looking for Brandy's love meter |
202 | 00:13:49,829 | 00:13:52,581 | Damn it l know l suck. l ain't got no poetry. | Damn it l know l suck. l ain't got no poetry. |
203 | 00:13:53,333 | 00:13:56,543 | See with a girl like Brandyʼ you got to have some poetry in you. | See with a girl like Brandyʼ you got to have some poetry in you. |
204 | 00:13:57,212 | 00:13:59,129 | But it's a catch-22. | But it's a catch-22. |
205 | 00:13:59,672 | 00:14:02,716 | Because a woman like that puts the poetry in you. | Because a woman like that puts the poetry in you. |
206 | 00:14:03,760 | 00:14:08,430 | Damn it to 'Frisco. l hate poetry. l can't stand poetry. | Damn it to 'Frisco. l hate poetry. l can't stand poetry. |
207 | 00:14:08,932 | 00:14:11,642 | Damn Joe Dirt. lt ain't right! | Damn Joe Dirt. lt ain't right! |
208 | 00:14:12,018 | 00:14:16,104 | lt ain't right. lt should be me man. lt should be me and not Joe Dirt. | lt ain't right. lt should be me man. lt should be me and not Joe Dirt. |
209 | 00:14:17,690 | 00:14:20,108 | Sorry about that guitar thing man. lt got out of hand. | Sorry about that guitar thing man. lt got out of hand. |
210 | 00:14:20,443 | 00:14:22,069 | lt is what it is. | lt is what it is. |
211 | 00:14:22,862 | 00:14:24,780 | We all have our cross to bear. | We all have our cross to bear. |
212 | 00:14:26,699 | 00:14:29,117 | Mine is Joe piece of Dirt. | Mine is Joe piece of Dirt. |
213 | 00:14:29,327 | 00:14:32,829 | Jimmy, that dude was trouble waiting to happen. | Jimmy, that dude was trouble waiting to happen. |
214 | 00:14:34,123 | 00:14:38,460 | But my girls, man, look at them. They was growing like weeds. | But my girls, man, look at them. They was growing like weeds. |
215 | 00:14:38,795 | 00:14:41,129 | Three beautiful flowers. | Three beautiful flowers. |
216 | 00:14:41,422 | 00:14:45,926 | Yeah, more flowers than weeds. Forget weeds. They was growin' like flowers. | Yeah, more flowers than weeds. Forget weeds. They was growin' like flowers. |
217 | 00:14:46,678 | 00:14:51,265 | But deep down inside, l was feeling like, who was l to be happy, you know? | But deep down inside, l was feeling like, who was l to be happy, you know? |
218 | 00:14:51,641 | 00:14:54,893 | 'Cause I was always nervous, feeling like it could all go away. | 'Cause I was always nervous, feeling like it could all go away. |
219 | 00:14:56,271 | 00:15:00,315 | Turns out l was right to be worried, because soon it all started unraveling on me. | Turns out l was right to be worried, because soon it all started unraveling on me. |
220 | 00:15:00,775 | 00:15:06,071 | l got this job as a logger, and one day, it all started coming crashing down on me. | l got this job as a logger, and one day, it all started coming crashing down on me. |
221 | 00:15:06,197 | 00:15:08,031 | It came down real bad. | It came down real bad. |
222 | 00:15:08,116 | 00:15:09,408 | Eleven-footer. | Eleven-footer. |
223 | 00:15:23,381 | 00:15:25,591 | Yeah. Yeah. | Yeah. Yeah. |
224 | 00:15:28,219 | 00:15:30,679 | Luke l am your logger. | Luke l am your logger. |
225 | 00:15:32,473 | 00:15:35,225 | You can't hear it but it was funny. All right here we go. | You can't hear it but it was funny. All right here we go. |
226 | 00:15:44,694 | 00:15:45,986 | lt's sticking. | lt's sticking. |
227 | 00:15:50,074 | 00:15:51,074 | That's lunch. | That's lunch. |
228 | 00:15:55,204 | 00:15:58,206 | l think l cut 66 logs so far man. | l think l cut 66 logs so far man. |
229 | 00:15:59,375 | 00:16:01,251 | Probably get a good price down at the mill. | Probably get a good price down at the mill. |
230 | 00:16:01,836 | 00:16:03,295 | -Hey Dirt? -Yep. | -Hey Dirt? -Yep. |
231 | 00:16:03,379 | 00:16:06,048 | -You strong? -You know it. | -You strong? -You know it. |
232 | 00:16:08,593 | 00:16:09,593 | Pick that up. | Pick that up. |
233 | 00:16:12,722 | 00:16:15,098 | Kinda walked into that one didn't l? Yeah. | Kinda walked into that one didn't l? Yeah. |
234 | 00:16:15,183 | 00:16:18,268 | Hey Dirt. You look like Elmer Fudd in that hat. | Hey Dirt. You look like Elmer Fudd in that hat. |
235 | 00:16:19,395 | 00:16:21,396 | Shit more like Elmer Fudgepacker. | Shit more like Elmer Fudgepacker. |
236 | 00:16:23,232 | 00:16:27,569 | Yeah that guy in the cartoons. Yeah l guess. Looking stupid yeah. | Yeah that guy in the cartoons. Yeah l guess. Looking stupid yeah. |
237 | 00:16:28,196 | 00:16:30,781 | l seem to have forgotten my lunchʼ | l seem to have forgotten my lunchʼ |
238 | 00:16:30,865 | 00:16:33,075 | maybe you could give me the apple core when you're done with it? | maybe you could give me the apple core when you're done with it? |
239 | 00:16:33,910 | 00:16:35,494 | Nah you can't have that boy. | Nah you can't have that boy. |
240 | 00:16:37,330 | 00:16:39,539 | l do have something for ya. Here you go. | l do have something for ya. Here you go. |
241 | 00:16:44,003 | 00:16:47,923 | Mind if l join ya? l got one for ya. Come on dirty Dirt. Come on. | Mind if l join ya? l got one for ya. Come on dirty Dirt. Come on. |
242 | 00:16:48,675 | 00:16:51,426 | l got one. l got one for a face to land on myself. | l got one. l got one for a face to land on myself. |
243 | 00:16:54,639 | 00:16:56,598 | A little up close and person... | A little up close and person... |
244 | 00:16:57,809 | 00:17:01,103 | Boy that one has got sauerkraut. | Boy that one has got sauerkraut. |
245 | 00:17:01,854 | 00:17:03,855 | Hey little logger boy. | Hey little logger boy. |
246 | 00:17:04,816 | 00:17:08,318 | Sexy Joe. These boys giving you trouble? | Sexy Joe. These boys giving you trouble? |
247 | 00:17:09,237 | 00:17:12,072 | No Missy we're just funning around. | No Missy we're just funning around. |
248 | 00:17:12,198 | 00:17:13,907 | Can you keep a secret? | Can you keep a secret? |
249 | 00:17:14,575 | 00:17:17,661 | -Yeah l guess so. -Then keep this a secret. | -Yeah l guess so. -Then keep this a secret. |
250 | 00:17:26,087 | 00:17:29,840 | That secret had some secret sauce in it. | That secret had some secret sauce in it. |
251 | 00:17:30,174 | 00:17:32,926 | How was hers the worst one? Oh man Missy. | How was hers the worst one? Oh man Missy. |
252 | 00:17:33,094 | 00:17:36,263 | l still got some meth gas left inside. | l still got some meth gas left inside. |
253 | 00:17:39,308 | 00:17:40,726 | Get this guy a paper towel. | Get this guy a paper towel. |
254 | 00:17:45,189 | 00:17:47,941 | You're right kraut. Can you read farts boy? | You're right kraut. Can you read farts boy? |
255 | 00:17:48,109 | 00:17:49,985 | Tell me what l had for supper last night. | Tell me what l had for supper last night. |
256 | 00:17:51,028 | 00:17:54,322 | All right that's it man. 22 times ain't funny no more. | All right that's it man. 22 times ain't funny no more. |
257 | 00:17:54,449 | 00:17:57,826 | ls this where you wanna be when Jesus comes back? Fartin' in Joe Dirt's face? | ls this where you wanna be when Jesus comes back? Fartin' in Joe Dirt's face? |
258 | 00:17:57,994 | 00:18:00,662 | l will take my chances. | l will take my chances. |
259 | 00:18:05,918 | 00:18:06,918 | Daddy? | Daddy? |
260 | 00:18:08,880 | 00:18:10,630 | Why are they farting on you? | Why are they farting on you? |
261 | 00:18:12,675 | 00:18:16,553 | And right there, it started to dawn on them that their dad, | And right there, it started to dawn on them that their dad, |
262 | 00:18:17,138 | 00:18:21,725 | the dad they used to think was Superman, wasn't no Superman. | the dad they used to think was Superman, wasn't no Superman. |
263 | 00:18:22,351 | 00:18:25,812 | He was a loser. He was just Joe Dirt. | He was a loser. He was just Joe Dirt. |
264 | 00:18:38,117 | 00:18:39,951 | Y'all leave him alone. | Y'all leave him alone. |
265 | 00:18:40,036 | 00:18:44,372 | Stop farting into his face or there's more whoop-ass where that came from. | Stop farting into his face or there's more whoop-ass where that came from. |
266 | 00:18:44,582 | 00:18:47,334 | -Missy! -What? l have a medical condition. | -Missy! -What? l have a medical condition. |
267 | 00:18:47,502 | 00:18:48,835 | Scram girl! | Scram girl! |
268 | 00:18:49,545 | 00:18:50,587 | l can't catch a break. | l can't catch a break. |
269 | 00:18:52,048 | 00:18:54,341 | Honey are you all right? | Honey are you all right? |
270 | 00:18:54,509 | 00:18:56,843 | Yeah Brandy. l can take care of myself. | Yeah Brandy. l can take care of myself. |
271 | 00:18:56,928 | 00:18:58,804 | l don't need you kicking these guys' butts for me. | l don't need you kicking these guys' butts for me. |
272 | 00:18:58,888 | 00:19:02,724 | l know you can take care of yourself baby. Of course you can. | l know you can take care of yourself baby. Of course you can. |
273 | 00:19:10,399 | 00:19:13,735 | And that was it. They saw right through me. | And that was it. They saw right through me. |
274 | 00:19:14,612 | 00:19:17,364 | l'm just the boy who was left at the Grand Canyon. | l'm just the boy who was left at the Grand Canyon. |
275 | 00:19:18,616 | 00:19:23,411 | Like some empty popsicle wrapperʼ you know? Like cherry or lemon-lime. | Like some empty popsicle wrapperʼ you know? Like cherry or lemon-lime. |
276 | 00:19:23,913 | 00:19:25,580 | Orange is another flavor... | Orange is another flavor... |
277 | 00:19:26,165 | 00:19:28,458 | You see now l never invented something great. | You see now l never invented something great. |
278 | 00:19:28,543 | 00:19:32,087 | l didn't do anything like that. l didn't invent antigravity or | l didn't do anything like that. l didn't invent antigravity or |
279 | 00:19:33,172 | 00:19:37,259 | Snausages or them "Back off Jack!" Yosemite Sam mud flaps. | Snausages or them "Back off Jack!" Yosemite Sam mud flaps. |
280 | 00:19:37,385 | 00:19:38,760 | Those are cool. l wish l did. | Those are cool. l wish l did. |
281 | 00:19:40,513 | 00:19:43,557 | l just thought if l was rich or famousʼ you know then l could make 'em proud | l just thought if l was rich or famousʼ you know then l could make 'em proud |
282 | 00:19:43,641 | 00:19:46,351 | and then they'd love me for real. | and then they'd love me for real. |
283 | 00:19:46,435 | 00:19:51,398 | Joe that's ridiculous! You love themʼ they love you. Go tell them it'll be fine. | Joe that's ridiculous! You love themʼ they love you. Go tell them it'll be fine. |
284 | 00:19:51,899 | 00:19:52,899 | l can't. | l can't. |
285 | 00:19:53,359 | 00:19:55,777 | 'Cause everything just went awayʼ like l knew it would. | 'Cause everything just went awayʼ like l knew it would. |
286 | 00:19:56,863 | 00:20:01,616 | You know one time when l was growing upʼ l was in one of my many foster homes | You know one time when l was growing upʼ l was in one of my many foster homes |
287 | 00:20:01,868 | 00:20:03,451 | and they had a guy come speak to usʼ | and they had a guy come speak to usʼ |
288 | 00:20:03,953 | 00:20:06,288 | and he was super smartʼ he was wearing glasses and everything. | and he was super smartʼ he was wearing glasses and everything. |
289 | 00:20:07,248 | 00:20:09,791 | He said something that stuck with meʼ l'll never forget it. | He said something that stuck with meʼ l'll never forget it. |
290 | 00:20:10,167 | 00:20:13,753 | He said "Revolutions never happen in countries where things get so bad | He said "Revolutions never happen in countries where things get so bad |
291 | 00:20:13,838 | 00:20:15,630 | "that people can't take it anymore." | "that people can't take it anymore." |
292 | 00:20:16,007 | 00:20:19,634 | No. "Revolutions happen when things just get a little bit better." | No. "Revolutions happen when things just get a little bit better." |
293 | 00:20:20,636 | 00:20:22,846 | People get a taste of what they've been missing. | People get a taste of what they've been missing. |
294 | 00:20:23,431 | 00:20:24,431 | And l got that. | And l got that. |
295 | 00:20:25,266 | 00:20:27,475 | l got my family and now it's gone. | l got my family and now it's gone. |
296 | 00:20:28,144 | 00:20:32,063 | -Gone what happened? -Well this is the part of the story | -Gone what happened? -Well this is the part of the story |
297 | 00:20:32,857 | 00:20:34,190 | where it gets really weird. | where it gets really weird. |
298 | 00:20:36,819 | 00:20:39,738 | There was a storm coming. Man, a big storm. | There was a storm coming. Man, a big storm. |
299 | 00:20:40,114 | 00:20:42,449 | A "mess up your hair really bad" storm. | A "mess up your hair really bad" storm. |
300 | 00:20:43,326 | 00:20:47,120 | Get into the basement. Come on! Cover your eyes! | Get into the basement. Come on! Cover your eyes! |
301 | 00:20:47,204 | 00:20:49,331 | -lt's all going to be okay! -Cover your eyes! | -lt's all going to be okay! -Cover your eyes! |
302 | 00:20:49,457 | 00:20:51,833 | -Come on girls. -Basement. Go babe. | -Come on girls. -Basement. Go babe. |
303 | 00:20:51,918 | 00:20:53,919 | Come on babies hurry. | Come on babies hurry. |
304 | 00:20:54,003 | 00:20:58,173 | -Daddy l'm scared. -lt's just wind. l know baby it's just wind. | -Daddy l'm scared. -lt's just wind. l know baby it's just wind. |
305 | 00:20:58,257 | 00:21:02,052 | Daddy my princess tiara. l left it in the trailer. | Daddy my princess tiara. l left it in the trailer. |
306 | 00:21:02,136 | 00:21:06,348 | -lt's okay. lt'll be there tomorrow honey. -But it was a birthday present from Daddy. | -lt's okay. lt'll be there tomorrow honey. -But it was a birthday present from Daddy. |
307 | 00:21:12,563 | 00:21:14,606 | -l'll go get it. -No. Don't go. | -l'll go get it. -No. Don't go. |
308 | 00:21:14,690 | 00:21:17,984 | l'll get it. lt's okay baby. l'm Superman. l'll be back. | l'll get it. lt's okay baby. l'm Superman. l'll be back. |
309 | 00:21:18,152 | 00:21:21,029 | Daddy be careful. We love you! | Daddy be careful. We love you! |
310 | 00:21:21,864 | 00:21:23,490 | Be careful Joe. | Be careful Joe. |
311 | 00:21:26,369 | 00:21:28,203 | Come on. Hurry! | Come on. Hurry! |
312 | 00:21:40,633 | 00:21:42,634 | Dang that twister's getting close! | Dang that twister's getting close! |
313 | 00:21:43,386 | 00:21:45,095 | Yeah this one is for real. | Yeah this one is for real. |
314 | 00:21:45,471 | 00:21:48,807 | Please don't scratch my car! | Please don't scratch my car! |
315 | 00:21:51,435 | 00:21:52,727 | Hi Daddy. | Hi Daddy. |
316 | 00:21:55,106 | 00:21:57,023 | Girls what happened to the storm? | Girls what happened to the storm? |
317 | 00:21:57,149 | 00:22:02,362 | What are you talking about loser? Go make us some cash like Kanye. | What are you talking about loser? Go make us some cash like Kanye. |
318 | 00:22:02,655 | 00:22:04,239 | Treat us like North. | Treat us like North. |
319 | 00:22:13,416 | 00:22:14,416 | Cow? | Cow? |
320 | 00:22:44,530 | 00:22:47,073 | Sock him in the jaw. He's all yours. He's all yours. | Sock him in the jaw. He's all yours. He's all yours. |
321 | 00:22:47,158 | 00:22:49,576 | Back him up back him up. Knock him down. | Back him up back him up. Knock him down. |
322 | 00:22:49,660 | 00:22:53,913 | l'm gonna whup you 'til you ain't nothin' but loose bones and loose change... | l'm gonna whup you 'til you ain't nothin' but loose bones and loose change... |
323 | 00:22:58,461 | 00:22:59,836 | Oh crap. | Oh crap. |
324 | 00:23:09,430 | 00:23:12,140 | You see that? Y'all see what happened? | You see that? Y'all see what happened? |
325 | 00:23:12,433 | 00:23:15,894 | A trailer come out of the skyʼ and lands on Lucky Louie. | A trailer come out of the skyʼ and lands on Lucky Louie. |
326 | 00:23:16,645 | 00:23:19,564 | Lucky Louie's dead. That could have been any one of us. | Lucky Louie's dead. That could have been any one of us. |
327 | 00:23:23,319 | 00:23:25,236 | What happened? | What happened? |
328 | 00:23:27,031 | 00:23:31,034 | You done killed the most vicious leader to ever head up the Smokin' Jokers. | You done killed the most vicious leader to ever head up the Smokin' Jokers. |
329 | 00:23:32,328 | 00:23:35,830 | You killed Lucky Louie with just one house. | You killed Lucky Louie with just one house. |
330 | 00:23:36,582 | 00:23:40,543 | No no man. l didn't kill nobody. l was spinning in the twister | No no man. l didn't kill nobody. l was spinning in the twister |
331 | 00:23:41,170 | 00:23:44,339 | -and it was a bad storm it threw me. -What storm? | -and it was a bad storm it threw me. -What storm? |
332 | 00:23:46,383 | 00:23:49,844 | lt was black clouds now it's all tweet-tweet. l don't know what happened. | lt was black clouds now it's all tweet-tweet. l don't know what happened. |
333 | 00:23:50,346 | 00:23:53,681 | You killed Lucky Louie and now you're our new leader. | You killed Lucky Louie and now you're our new leader. |
334 | 00:23:54,558 | 00:23:56,226 | Long as you wear theseʼ | Long as you wear theseʼ |
335 | 00:23:57,103 | 00:23:59,979 | we go where you goʼ and we ride where you ride. | we go where you goʼ and we ride where you ride. |
336 | 00:24:00,981 | 00:24:04,317 | Oh man these are nice. The ruby's a little fruity but l'll take them. | Oh man these are nice. The ruby's a little fruity but l'll take them. |
337 | 00:24:04,485 | 00:24:07,070 | Name's Foggle. What's your name brother? | Name's Foggle. What's your name brother? |
338 | 00:24:07,696 | 00:24:11,157 | Joe. Joe Dirt. Joe Dirtay. | Joe. Joe Dirt. Joe Dirtay. |
339 | 00:24:11,367 | 00:24:12,408 | Which is it? | Which is it? |
340 | 00:24:12,701 | 00:24:15,411 | -Joe Dirt. -You all hear that? | -Joe Dirt. -You all hear that? |
341 | 00:24:15,913 | 00:24:19,499 | -All hail Joe Dirt. -All hail Joe Dirt. | -All hail Joe Dirt. -All hail Joe Dirt. |
342 | 00:24:20,543 | 00:24:22,710 | You guys ain't gonna fart on me are you? | You guys ain't gonna fart on me are you? |
343 | 00:24:24,880 | 00:24:27,966 | Long story short we stomped those three dudes so badʼ | Long story short we stomped those three dudes so badʼ |
344 | 00:24:28,050 | 00:24:30,468 | they got to take their boots off to piss. | they got to take their boots off to piss. |
345 | 00:24:33,514 | 00:24:36,182 | Anyway that kinda ass-kicking fun is an everyday thing for us | Anyway that kinda ass-kicking fun is an everyday thing for us |
346 | 00:24:36,267 | 00:24:39,769 | and now you get to tell us who to kickʼ and in which ass. | and now you get to tell us who to kickʼ and in which ass. |
347 | 00:24:42,439 | 00:24:43,481 | All right man. | All right man. |
348 | 00:24:43,566 | 00:24:46,401 | Well kind of like monkey seeʼ monkey do l like that. | Well kind of like monkey seeʼ monkey do l like that. |
349 | 00:24:46,735 | 00:24:50,780 | Okay. How about this? l need a vetʼ 'cause these puppies are sick. | Okay. How about this? l need a vetʼ 'cause these puppies are sick. |
350 | 00:24:51,240 | 00:24:53,950 | l need a vetʼ 'cause these puppies are sick. | l need a vetʼ 'cause these puppies are sick. |
351 | 00:24:55,995 | 00:24:57,871 | Not bad l'm a good leader. | Not bad l'm a good leader. |
352 | 00:24:58,122 | 00:24:59,622 | But l'm actually not. l'm no good. | But l'm actually not. l'm no good. |
353 | 00:24:59,707 | 00:25:03,418 | l know l couldn't lead a colony of ants to a melting Hershey Bar to be honestʼ | l know l couldn't lead a colony of ants to a melting Hershey Bar to be honestʼ |
354 | 00:25:03,544 | 00:25:04,544 | believe me l've tried. | believe me l've tried. |
355 | 00:25:04,920 | 00:25:06,671 | But l do have three daughters l want you to meet. | But l do have three daughters l want you to meet. |
356 | 00:25:06,755 | 00:25:09,924 | l've got a pretty wife l'll bring her down. We'll all have fun maybe brunch. | l've got a pretty wife l'll bring her down. We'll all have fun maybe brunch. |
357 | 00:25:10,009 | 00:25:12,427 | And by the way you knowʼ all the kids stuff blah blah. | And by the way you knowʼ all the kids stuff blah blah. |
358 | 00:25:12,511 | 00:25:15,638 | So no talking about fightingʼ and drinking and spittingʼ | So no talking about fightingʼ and drinking and spittingʼ |
359 | 00:25:15,764 | 00:25:18,266 | and punching and kicking you get it. 'Cause you knowʼ | and punching and kicking you get it. 'Cause you knowʼ |
360 | 00:25:18,350 | 00:25:21,269 | that kind of violent imagery for a childʼ l don't want. | that kind of violent imagery for a childʼ l don't want. |
361 | 00:25:21,478 | 00:25:26,482 | Besides this is the year 201 5 l don't know about even a motorcycle "gang" fighting... | Besides this is the year 201 5 l don't know about even a motorcycle "gang" fighting... |
362 | 00:25:26,567 | 00:25:30,612 | "201 5"? lt's not 201 5. lt's 1 965. | "201 5"? lt's not 201 5. lt's 1 965. |
363 | 00:25:31,906 | 00:25:35,283 | No l'm sayin' now is 201 5 June 201 5. | No l'm sayin' now is 201 5 June 201 5. |
364 | 00:25:35,618 | 00:25:40,455 | No it's definitely Juneʼ but it ain't no 201 5 Mr. Dirt. | No it's definitely Juneʼ but it ain't no 201 5 Mr. Dirt. |
365 | 00:25:41,123 | 00:25:43,124 | This is June 1 965. | This is June 1 965. |
366 | 00:25:43,584 | 00:25:47,295 | June 1 965? Well if that's true l'd be running around in diapies that's when l was born. | June 1 965? Well if that's true l'd be running around in diapies that's when l was born. |
367 | 00:25:47,755 | 00:25:49,214 | l don't got no diapies on. | l don't got no diapies on. |
368 | 00:25:49,506 | 00:25:52,634 | But anyway l like it hereʼ and l wanna meet everybody. | But anyway l like it hereʼ and l wanna meet everybody. |
369 | 00:25:52,718 | 00:25:54,802 | And l think as a new leaderʼ l'm gonna name everybody. | And l think as a new leaderʼ l'm gonna name everybody. |
370 | 00:25:55,095 | 00:25:59,098 | 'Cause you know gangs have nicknames. l think that's fun. l'm gonna start in the back. | 'Cause you know gangs have nicknames. l think that's fun. l'm gonna start in the back. |
371 | 00:25:59,642 | 00:26:02,894 | You think l'm ignoring you? Back there you got sort of a beak | You think l'm ignoring you? Back there you got sort of a beak |
372 | 00:26:03,395 | 00:26:06,522 | on your nose like a little bit like a bird. | on your nose like a little bit like a bird. |
373 | 00:26:06,690 | 00:26:09,817 | What's a funny bird name? "Bird" is not that's too uninteresting. | What's a funny bird name? "Bird" is not that's too uninteresting. |
374 | 00:26:10,194 | 00:26:15,073 | A mean one is vulture. You're Vulture from now on if anyone asks you okay? | A mean one is vulture. You're Vulture from now on if anyone asks you okay? |
375 | 00:26:15,157 | 00:26:16,616 | Let's look around the room. | Let's look around the room. |
376 | 00:26:16,700 | 00:26:20,536 | All right here we goʼ there's Mean Marvin No Soap Samʼ | All right here we goʼ there's Mean Marvin No Soap Samʼ |
377 | 00:26:20,704 | 00:26:24,707 | Douche Bag Jolly Mean Giant Church Burner Fruit Loop Palm Treeʼ | Douche Bag Jolly Mean Giant Church Burner Fruit Loop Palm Treeʼ |
378 | 00:26:24,792 | 00:26:28,670 | Crazy Eyes Dopey lnky more like Stinky. | Crazy Eyes Dopey lnky more like Stinky. |
379 | 00:26:30,381 | 00:26:33,883 | We got Pillow Biter Reload No Nutʼ | We got Pillow Biter Reload No Nutʼ |
380 | 00:26:34,176 | 00:26:38,263 | Momma Hates You Gooey Load Queefieʼ | Momma Hates You Gooey Load Queefieʼ |
381 | 00:26:38,514 | 00:26:41,516 | Jock Strap Jonny okay Tea-Bagger Vanceʼ | Jock Strap Jonny okay Tea-Bagger Vanceʼ |
382 | 00:26:41,684 | 00:26:42,684 | Nucky Futzʼ | Nucky Futzʼ |
383 | 00:26:43,018 | 00:26:47,480 | Charlie Dog Super Dumb there's Going to Hell there's Gary. | Charlie Dog Super Dumb there's Going to Hell there's Gary. |
384 | 00:26:48,440 | 00:26:52,277 | Con Artist Connie One Eye Two Eyeʼ | Con Artist Connie One Eye Two Eyeʼ |
385 | 00:26:52,528 | 00:26:54,529 | Two Eyes is no good. Everybody has two eyes right? | Two Eyes is no good. Everybody has two eyes right? |
386 | 00:26:54,655 | 00:26:58,783 | l'm running out. Porn Stash Little Killer Medium Killerʼ | l'm running out. Porn Stash Little Killer Medium Killerʼ |
387 | 00:26:58,867 | 00:27:03,746 | Flat Ass Boogie Oogie Cherʼ Mitch the Bitch Knee Caps No Teeth. | Flat Ass Boogie Oogie Cherʼ Mitch the Bitch Knee Caps No Teeth. |
388 | 00:27:03,831 | 00:27:07,792 | -Knock knock. Who's there? You're Ugly. -"Ugly"? | -Knock knock. Who's there? You're Ugly. -"Ugly"? |
389 | 00:27:07,876 | 00:27:09,877 | That whole thing is your nickname. | That whole thing is your nickname. |
390 | 00:27:10,004 | 00:27:14,882 | And you are l forgot you Foggle. How about Lead Singer of Blue Oyster Cult. | And you are l forgot you Foggle. How about Lead Singer of Blue Oyster Cult. |
391 | 00:27:15,092 | 00:27:18,636 | You'll get that one. That's funny. You seen him? You get it good. | You'll get that one. That's funny. You seen him? You get it good. |
392 | 00:27:18,721 | 00:27:21,014 | Maybe the bass player it's exact. | Maybe the bass player it's exact. |
393 | 00:27:21,098 | 00:27:24,976 | Anyway as your new leaderʼ l command ye to roll up your sleevesʼ | Anyway as your new leaderʼ l command ye to roll up your sleevesʼ |
394 | 00:27:25,060 | 00:27:28,479 | and let's do some charity work. Let's do some good for once you know? | and let's do some charity work. Let's do some good for once you know? |
395 | 00:27:28,731 | 00:27:32,775 | Let's get out there and help because that's where we wanna be when Jesus comes back. | Let's get out there and help because that's where we wanna be when Jesus comes back. |
396 | 00:27:33,027 | 00:27:35,069 | Who's with me? Come on now let's do this. | Who's with me? Come on now let's do this. |
397 | 00:27:39,575 | 00:27:41,075 | You hear that everybody? | You hear that everybody? |
398 | 00:27:42,911 | 00:27:45,747 | That little queer wants us to help people in need. | That little queer wants us to help people in need. |
399 | 00:27:46,081 | 00:27:47,081 | Yeah? | Yeah? |
400 | 00:27:49,376 | 00:27:54,005 | ls that queer man? ls that queer? Think this is queer? | ls that queer man? ls that queer? Think this is queer? |
401 | 00:27:54,173 | 00:27:55,173 | Yes. | Yes. |
402 | 00:27:55,841 | 00:27:56,841 | What? | What? |
403 | 00:27:57,176 | 00:27:58,968 | Well next time don't make it a question. | Well next time don't make it a question. |
404 | 00:27:59,261 | 00:28:00,845 | You're all like "ls this queer?" | You're all like "ls this queer?" |
405 | 00:28:01,013 | 00:28:03,598 | So that just walks you right into the answerʼ which is yes. | So that just walks you right into the answerʼ which is yes. |
406 | 00:28:04,099 | 00:28:05,683 | Just make it a statement dumbass. | Just make it a statement dumbass. |
407 | 00:28:06,935 | 00:28:09,437 | Yeah? What about... | Yeah? What about... |
408 | 00:28:10,397 | 00:28:13,066 | Yeah hey Foggle you're strong. | Yeah hey Foggle you're strong. |
409 | 00:28:13,692 | 00:28:17,487 | Strong smellin' yeah. Got ya hold 'em up. Hold 'em up. | Strong smellin' yeah. Got ya hold 'em up. Hold 'em up. |
410 | 00:28:17,780 | 00:28:19,697 | -Got ya good. -lt took you that long to think of that? | -Got ya good. -lt took you that long to think of that? |
411 | 00:28:20,866 | 00:28:23,201 | To be honest l thought of it about a week ago and then | To be honest l thought of it about a week ago and then |
412 | 00:28:24,286 | 00:28:26,120 | l've been waiting to use it. | l've been waiting to use it. |
413 | 00:28:26,288 | 00:28:28,206 | But l didn't think l would. lt's been in the chamber loaded upʼ | But l didn't think l would. lt's been in the chamber loaded upʼ |
414 | 00:28:28,290 | 00:28:29,957 | and guess who got it? You. | and guess who got it? You. |
415 | 00:28:30,584 | 00:28:32,668 | Guess what else? l got your boots. | Guess what else? l got your boots. |
416 | 00:28:32,836 | 00:28:35,046 | You think you're gonna get 'em back? Not quite termite. | You think you're gonna get 'em back? Not quite termite. |
417 | 00:28:35,130 | 00:28:38,007 | -Give us those boots. -l'm running away. Good luck catching me. | -Give us those boots. -l'm running away. Good luck catching me. |
418 | 00:28:38,133 | 00:28:39,384 | Which way am l going? | Which way am l going? |
419 | 00:28:40,594 | 00:28:41,594 | Get back here! | Get back here! |
420 | 00:28:42,304 | 00:28:44,972 | You ain't man enough to wear those boots. You know that Joe Dirt. | You ain't man enough to wear those boots. You know that Joe Dirt. |
421 | 00:28:45,099 | 00:28:47,517 | You ain't nothing. You know that in your heart. | You ain't nothing. You know that in your heart. |
422 | 00:28:47,601 | 00:28:51,187 | We will track you to the gates of hell. | We will track you to the gates of hell. |
423 | 00:28:51,939 | 00:28:52,939 | -Let's go. -Yeah. | -Let's go. -Yeah. |
424 | 00:28:55,234 | 00:28:56,234 | Stupid Foggle. | Stupid Foggle. |
425 | 00:28:57,277 | 00:29:01,280 | What a dumb name. He needs a cool nameʼ like Joe Dirtay. | What a dumb name. He needs a cool nameʼ like Joe Dirtay. |
426 | 00:29:02,366 | 00:29:04,158 | Hey Foggle. | Hey Foggle. |
427 | 00:29:05,035 | 00:29:06,369 | Why don't you go play Boggle? | Why don't you go play Boggle? |
428 | 00:29:06,703 | 00:29:09,622 | God dang that's so funnyʼ why didn't l say it? | God dang that's so funnyʼ why didn't l say it? |
429 | 00:29:10,332 | 00:29:11,499 | l think of all the good ones too late. | l think of all the good ones too late. |
430 | 00:29:12,501 | 00:29:15,128 | Well l got my tennis shoesʼ and his stupid boots! | Well l got my tennis shoesʼ and his stupid boots! |
431 | 00:29:16,004 | 00:29:17,422 | Well l don't need these sneakers no more. | Well l don't need these sneakers no more. |
432 | 00:29:20,342 | 00:29:21,509 | Fetch that Boggle! | Fetch that Boggle! |
433 | 00:29:21,885 | 00:29:24,637 | Man it usually takes me 27 times. Nice. | Man it usually takes me 27 times. Nice. |
434 | 00:29:24,930 | 00:29:29,851 | Hey how come ya threw your sneakers up over that power line? | Hey how come ya threw your sneakers up over that power line? |
435 | 00:29:31,353 | 00:29:34,105 | -Why? You've never seen that before? -No silly head! | -Why? You've never seen that before? -No silly head! |
436 | 00:29:35,858 | 00:29:37,233 | Silly head 1 965. | Silly head 1 965. |
437 | 00:29:37,526 | 00:29:40,862 | l must've travelled through some sort of vortex and tumbled through timeʼ | l must've travelled through some sort of vortex and tumbled through timeʼ |
438 | 00:29:41,321 | 00:29:42,321 | like a time traveler. | like a time traveler. |
439 | 00:29:42,990 | 00:29:44,031 | l don't know what's happening. | l don't know what's happening. |
440 | 00:29:44,491 | 00:29:46,784 | But l'll tell ya that happens in the future. | But l'll tell ya that happens in the future. |
441 | 00:29:47,119 | 00:29:49,954 | We find out carbs are bad for yaʼ just a heads up. | We find out carbs are bad for yaʼ just a heads up. |
442 | 00:29:50,038 | 00:29:52,874 | Hey. You really from the future? | Hey. You really from the future? |
443 | 00:29:53,208 | 00:29:54,208 | Yeah man. | Yeah man. |
444 | 00:29:54,501 | 00:29:57,670 | Maybe you should move down to Louisianaʼ help me start my fishing business! | Maybe you should move down to Louisianaʼ help me start my fishing business! |
445 | 00:29:58,130 | 00:30:00,423 | You and l together man we could catch a lot of shrimp! | You and l together man we could catch a lot of shrimp! |
446 | 00:30:00,883 | 00:30:05,553 | l mean there's rock shrimp Atlantic shrimpʼ salt shrimp boo-boo shrimp tater shrimpʼ | l mean there's rock shrimp Atlantic shrimpʼ salt shrimp boo-boo shrimp tater shrimpʼ |
447 | 00:30:05,721 | 00:30:09,348 | shrimp on a stick shrimp remoulade shrimp in your pasta you know what fuck shrimp! | shrimp on a stick shrimp remoulade shrimp in your pasta you know what fuck shrimp! |
448 | 00:30:09,766 | 00:30:12,310 | Okay so no on the shrimp biz? | Okay so no on the shrimp biz? |
449 | 00:30:12,394 | 00:30:14,479 | What's the situation with your hair? | What's the situation with your hair? |
450 | 00:30:14,646 | 00:30:15,897 | Did l call your number? | Did l call your number? |
451 | 00:30:16,398 | 00:30:17,565 | Are we in a deli? | Are we in a deli? |
452 | 00:30:17,733 | 00:30:20,067 | We are not. And l did not. Goodbye. | We are not. And l did not. Goodbye. |
453 | 00:30:21,111 | 00:30:22,945 | Did you call number three yet? | Did you call number three yet? |
454 | 00:30:23,280 | 00:30:26,616 | Did l call number... No that was a metaphorʼ this ain't really a bakery man. | Did l call number... No that was a metaphorʼ this ain't really a bakery man. |
455 | 00:30:26,992 | 00:30:29,452 | Yeah l know. l was just patiently waiting my turn. | Yeah l know. l was just patiently waiting my turn. |
456 | 00:30:29,620 | 00:30:32,079 | You see that? He's patiently waiting his turn all right? | You see that? He's patiently waiting his turn all right? |
457 | 00:30:32,414 | 00:30:34,582 | That's nice instead of yelling out nonsense. | That's nice instead of yelling out nonsense. |
458 | 00:30:34,708 | 00:30:37,084 | Yeah one day l'm gonna dig a hole. | Yeah one day l'm gonna dig a hole. |
459 | 00:30:38,086 | 00:30:39,170 | Well that's great man. | Well that's great man. |
460 | 00:30:39,671 | 00:30:42,006 | See there you go. You're gonna have a great big hole. | See there you go. You're gonna have a great big hole. |
461 | 00:30:42,090 | 00:30:44,467 | lt's gonna be the biggest oneʼ and l'm glad you're setting goals. | lt's gonna be the biggest oneʼ and l'm glad you're setting goals. |
462 | 00:30:44,760 | 00:30:46,427 | lt's gonna be in my living room. | lt's gonna be in my living room. |
463 | 00:30:47,679 | 00:30:49,889 | Yeah well you had meʼ then you lost me there. | Yeah well you had meʼ then you lost me there. |
464 | 00:30:50,390 | 00:30:52,558 | -Are you married? -l am married. Now that's a normal question. | -Are you married? -l am married. Now that's a normal question. |
465 | 00:30:52,643 | 00:30:55,353 | -l'm married to Brandy. She's sweet. -Wait a minute. | -l'm married to Brandy. She's sweet. -Wait a minute. |
466 | 00:30:55,938 | 00:30:57,897 | ls she like a great big fat person? | ls she like a great big fat person? |
467 | 00:30:58,440 | 00:31:02,485 | A great big fat person? She is not. She's about 1 1 5 l'm guessing. | A great big fat person? She is not. She's about 1 1 5 l'm guessing. |
468 | 00:31:02,986 | 00:31:05,530 | l really wish those numbers were turned around. | l really wish those numbers were turned around. |
469 | 00:31:06,114 | 00:31:07,448 | Like 51 1 ? | Like 51 1 ? |
470 | 00:31:07,866 | 00:31:09,408 | Well then she'd be a great big fat person. | Well then she'd be a great big fat person. |
471 | 00:31:09,576 | 00:31:15,540 | Yeah no l like her 1 1 5. Anything over likeʼ 400 l'm not super attracted to. | Yeah no l like her 1 1 5. Anything over likeʼ 400 l'm not super attracted to. |
472 | 00:31:15,624 | 00:31:17,291 | l'd like to cut her skin offʼ | l'd like to cut her skin offʼ |
473 | 00:31:17,709 | 00:31:22,755 | and then sew it together so that l could wear it as a human tracksuit. | and then sew it together so that l could wear it as a human tracksuit. |
474 | 00:31:25,133 | 00:31:29,303 | Maybe l'm hearing you wrong it sounds a little not normal what you're saying? | Maybe l'm hearing you wrong it sounds a little not normal what you're saying? |
475 | 00:31:29,596 | 00:31:30,596 | My name's Bob. | My name's Bob. |
476 | 00:31:31,473 | 00:31:34,642 | lf l had any friendsʼ they'd call me Buffalo Bob. | lf l had any friendsʼ they'd call me Buffalo Bob. |
477 | 00:31:35,644 | 00:31:39,272 | Why don't you give me a call if your wife ever becomes a great big fat person? | Why don't you give me a call if your wife ever becomes a great big fat person? |
478 | 00:31:39,481 | 00:31:41,732 | Buffalo Bob that sounds... | Buffalo Bob that sounds... |
479 | 00:31:42,818 | 00:31:45,653 | You have no idea what kind of hell l can bring you! | You have no idea what kind of hell l can bring you! |
480 | 00:31:46,572 | 00:31:49,407 | All right enough you broken record! | All right enough you broken record! |
481 | 00:31:49,491 | 00:31:50,825 | Does what it's told! | Does what it's told! |
482 | 00:31:50,909 | 00:31:53,661 | Say it don't spray it brother! Dang. | Say it don't spray it brother! Dang. |
483 | 00:31:54,037 | 00:31:55,037 | Buffalo Bob! | Buffalo Bob! |
484 | 00:31:55,497 | 00:31:56,497 | Man! | Man! |
485 | 00:31:56,873 | 00:31:58,666 | Was that all in my living room? | Was that all in my living room? |
486 | 00:31:58,792 | 00:32:00,126 | 'Cause that's step one. | 'Cause that's step one. |
487 | 00:32:00,669 | 00:32:03,546 | Gotta run. There's a huge crazy party behind that shed. | Gotta run. There's a huge crazy party behind that shed. |
488 | 00:32:03,755 | 00:32:05,673 | You can go there's three tickets left. | You can go there's three tickets left. |
489 | 00:32:09,094 | 00:32:10,094 | What are you up to? | What are you up to? |
490 | 00:32:12,681 | 00:32:14,015 | "Genghis Khan." | "Genghis Khan." |
491 | 00:32:15,517 | 00:32:16,684 | Genghis Khan what? | Genghis Khan what? |
492 | 00:32:29,239 | 00:32:30,865 | lt's a comic book store? | lt's a comic book store? |
493 | 00:32:32,284 | 00:32:35,202 | lf l'm back in time l could maybe buy... | lf l'm back in time l could maybe buy... |
494 | 00:32:38,874 | 00:32:39,874 | ls that Brandy? | ls that Brandy? |
495 | 00:32:41,001 | 00:32:42,001 | Brandy! | Brandy! |
496 | 00:33:04,733 | 00:33:06,233 | Like a beaut. | Like a beaut. |
497 | 00:33:10,739 | 00:33:12,198 | You got that $5 you owe me? | You got that $5 you owe me? |
498 | 00:33:13,575 | 00:33:16,911 | See l was thinking you know since we're both seniors nowʼ | See l was thinking you know since we're both seniors nowʼ |
499 | 00:33:17,829 | 00:33:21,290 | maybe it's time we you know... | maybe it's time we you know... |
500 | 00:33:22,084 | 00:33:24,543 | Wait a second. l think l see Jill. | Wait a second. l think l see Jill. |
501 | 00:33:25,253 | 00:33:28,381 | l've gotta go talk to her. She needs help with her homework. | l've gotta go talk to her. She needs help with her homework. |
502 | 00:33:28,715 | 00:33:29,715 | All right. | All right. |
503 | 00:33:30,092 | 00:33:33,052 | Homework is important. l'll be here waiting. | Homework is important. l'll be here waiting. |
504 | 00:33:35,263 | 00:33:36,263 | Like always. | Like always. |
505 | 00:33:39,267 | 00:33:42,395 | Wow. That was a total red light. | Wow. That was a total red light. |
506 | 00:33:42,771 | 00:33:45,106 | She gave you nothing but brake fluid. You're smothered in it. | She gave you nothing but brake fluid. You're smothered in it. |
507 | 00:33:45,440 | 00:33:46,524 | So funny l forgot to laugh. | So funny l forgot to laugh. |
508 | 00:33:47,609 | 00:33:50,319 | Guess it's time to try the old "Popcorn Surprise." | Guess it's time to try the old "Popcorn Surprise." |
509 | 00:33:50,946 | 00:33:51,946 | What's a "Popcorn Surprise"? | What's a "Popcorn Surprise"? |
510 | 00:33:52,781 | 00:33:53,823 | Listen up here's the skinny. | Listen up here's the skinny. |
511 | 00:33:54,825 | 00:33:57,618 | See l put a hole through the bottom of a large tub of popcorn. | See l put a hole through the bottom of a large tub of popcorn. |
512 | 00:33:57,953 | 00:33:58,953 | Does the popcorn fall out? | Does the popcorn fall out? |
513 | 00:33:59,663 | 00:34:01,414 | l don't know it doesn't matter all right? | l don't know it doesn't matter all right? |
514 | 00:34:01,707 | 00:34:06,669 | After l cut the hole throughʼ l put my thingy up through the hole. | After l cut the hole throughʼ l put my thingy up through the hole. |
515 | 00:34:06,962 | 00:34:09,422 | Wait hold on now fella you lost me. What's a thingy? | Wait hold on now fella you lost me. What's a thingy? |
516 | 00:34:09,589 | 00:34:11,048 | Get smart and get smart fast! | Get smart and get smart fast! |
517 | 00:34:11,466 | 00:34:13,175 | That thing you use to go number one? | That thing you use to go number one? |
518 | 00:34:14,302 | 00:34:16,595 | So that's what keeps the popcorn from falling out. | So that's what keeps the popcorn from falling out. |
519 | 00:34:16,680 | 00:34:17,680 | Makes sense. | Makes sense. |
520 | 00:34:17,764 | 00:34:19,181 | l guess so but that's not the point. | l guess so but that's not the point. |
521 | 00:34:19,474 | 00:34:23,644 | All right? Anyways after l get my thingy stuck up through the holeʼ | All right? Anyways after l get my thingy stuck up through the holeʼ |
522 | 00:34:23,979 | 00:34:28,149 | she reaches to grab the popcornʼ presto! Handful of thingy! | she reaches to grab the popcornʼ presto! Handful of thingy! |
523 | 00:34:29,943 | 00:34:31,610 | -That's cool. -Spread the word around. | -That's cool. -Spread the word around. |
524 | 00:34:32,320 | 00:34:34,280 | -lt's gonna be classic. -Yeah all right all right! | -lt's gonna be classic. -Yeah all right all right! |
525 | 00:34:34,364 | 00:34:35,364 | Go go go! | Go go go! |
526 | 00:34:36,950 | 00:34:38,909 | So he finally made his move on you? | So he finally made his move on you? |
527 | 00:34:39,161 | 00:34:45,249 | Yeah he's sweet but l don't have those kind of feelings for him. | Yeah he's sweet but l don't have those kind of feelings for him. |
528 | 00:34:46,084 | 00:34:47,835 | You need to check your temperature girlʼ | You need to check your temperature girlʼ |
529 | 00:34:47,919 | 00:34:50,337 | because he's the most dreamiest boy in school. | because he's the most dreamiest boy in school. |
530 | 00:34:50,422 | 00:34:54,884 | Brandy hey sorry. l just ran five miles chasing you! | Brandy hey sorry. l just ran five miles chasing you! |
531 | 00:34:55,552 | 00:34:56,552 | What are you doing here? | What are you doing here? |
532 | 00:34:57,721 | 00:34:59,555 | What are you wearing? That looks funny. | What are you wearing? That looks funny. |
533 | 00:35:00,223 | 00:35:01,515 | l'm sorry do l know you? | l'm sorry do l know you? |
534 | 00:35:02,392 | 00:35:04,852 | -Brandy! -And my name isn't Brandy. | -Brandy! -And my name isn't Brandy. |
535 | 00:35:05,812 | 00:35:06,812 | l'm Ashleen. | l'm Ashleen. |
536 | 00:35:07,063 | 00:35:09,774 | Well if it's 1 965 and you're Ashleen... | Well if it's 1 965 and you're Ashleen... |
537 | 00:35:09,858 | 00:35:13,569 | Yeah it's 1 965 strange-o. What about it you freaky guy? | Yeah it's 1 965 strange-o. What about it you freaky guy? |
538 | 00:35:14,279 | 00:35:16,697 | Oh my God are you Brandy's mom? | Oh my God are you Brandy's mom? |
539 | 00:35:18,784 | 00:35:22,578 | l don't know what you're sayin' but l have always liked the name Brandy. | l don't know what you're sayin' but l have always liked the name Brandy. |
540 | 00:35:23,121 | 00:35:24,955 | l could see me namin' a daughter that. | l could see me namin' a daughter that. |
541 | 00:35:25,207 | 00:35:27,374 | Yeah you can 'cause you... | Yeah you can 'cause you... |
542 | 00:35:28,251 | 00:35:31,253 | Why are you talkin' to our girls and what's the deal with your hair you weirdo? | Why are you talkin' to our girls and what's the deal with your hair you weirdo? |
543 | 00:35:31,588 | 00:35:33,172 | Yeah show him your muscles fellas. | Yeah show him your muscles fellas. |
544 | 00:35:33,298 | 00:35:35,132 | Maybe he'll scram. And scram fast. | Maybe he'll scram. And scram fast. |
545 | 00:35:36,051 | 00:35:37,051 | Check this out. | Check this out. |
546 | 00:35:37,636 | 00:35:38,636 | Do you even lift? | Do you even lift? |
547 | 00:35:41,765 | 00:35:45,351 | Listen l better go because these guys are getting a little cranky. | Listen l better go because these guys are getting a little cranky. |
548 | 00:35:45,644 | 00:35:49,355 | All right? So listen Ashleenʼ l think l came here to the past | All right? So listen Ashleenʼ l think l came here to the past |
549 | 00:35:49,481 | 00:35:52,233 | to fix something about myself you know? | to fix something about myself you know? |
550 | 00:35:52,317 | 00:35:55,486 | So l deserve the daughter that you're gonna have one day. | So l deserve the daughter that you're gonna have one day. |
551 | 00:35:57,489 | 00:36:00,574 | -l don't know what you mean. -l don't know either. | -l don't know what you mean. -l don't know either. |
552 | 00:36:01,034 | 00:36:03,911 | And by the way do not eat Jimmy's popcorn okay? | And by the way do not eat Jimmy's popcorn okay? |
553 | 00:36:04,371 | 00:36:08,207 | "Jimmy"? No his name is Rory. | "Jimmy"? No his name is Rory. |
554 | 00:36:08,583 | 00:36:09,583 | Rory Yauch. | Rory Yauch. |
555 | 00:36:10,085 | 00:36:15,130 | Fudge! That's Jimmy's dad! Man this shit just got officially weird. | Fudge! That's Jimmy's dad! Man this shit just got officially weird. |
556 | 00:36:15,215 | 00:36:18,092 | Hey you watch your languageʼ buddy boy fella! | Hey you watch your languageʼ buddy boy fella! |
557 | 00:36:18,593 | 00:36:19,844 | You want a big bar of soap in your mouth? | You want a big bar of soap in your mouth? |
558 | 00:36:20,262 | 00:36:21,262 | Hey are you a vet? | Hey are you a vet? |
559 | 00:36:21,888 | 00:36:23,222 | 'Cause these puppies are sick. | 'Cause these puppies are sick. |
560 | 00:36:23,849 | 00:36:27,434 | Yeah you like that one? Talk to the fistʼ 'cause the hand is pissed. | Yeah you like that one? Talk to the fistʼ 'cause the hand is pissed. |
561 | 00:36:27,644 | 00:36:30,437 | Those are from the future! You just got futurized. | Those are from the future! You just got futurized. |
562 | 00:36:30,689 | 00:36:33,107 | You got a burn and it came down from the future and got you. | You got a burn and it came down from the future and got you. |
563 | 00:36:33,400 | 00:36:36,944 | You're a little dazed right now it'll go away. But don't fight it just... | You're a little dazed right now it'll go away. But don't fight it just... |
564 | 00:36:37,445 | 00:36:39,321 | Hey he's gonna give you the "Popcorn Surprise." | Hey he's gonna give you the "Popcorn Surprise." |
565 | 00:36:40,031 | 00:36:41,407 | What's a "Popcorn Surprise"? | What's a "Popcorn Surprise"? |
566 | 00:36:41,825 | 00:36:44,034 | l'll give you a hint it's more surprise than popcorn okay? | l'll give you a hint it's more surprise than popcorn okay? |
567 | 00:36:44,119 | 00:36:46,287 | Just promise me you don't put your hand in that cup all right? | Just promise me you don't put your hand in that cup all right? |
568 | 00:36:47,163 | 00:36:48,664 | Just think of me as your guardian angelʼ all right? | Just think of me as your guardian angelʼ all right? |
569 | 00:36:49,708 | 00:36:51,667 | Looking out for the love of my life. | Looking out for the love of my life. |
570 | 00:36:52,919 | 00:36:53,919 | Bye! | Bye! |
571 | 00:37:01,803 | 00:37:04,597 | How are you son? This movie's a hoot isn't it? | How are you son? This movie's a hoot isn't it? |
572 | 00:37:04,890 | 00:37:06,974 | Dad what are you doin' here? Mom! | Dad what are you doin' here? Mom! |
573 | 00:37:07,058 | 00:37:08,058 | l want some popcorn. | l want some popcorn. |
574 | 00:37:08,143 | 00:37:09,435 | No no! | No no! |
575 | 00:37:11,104 | 00:37:12,438 | Don't stop! | Don't stop! |
576 | 00:37:15,191 | 00:37:16,358 | Don't stop don't stop! | Don't stop don't stop! |
577 | 00:37:17,068 | 00:37:18,068 | l like it. | l like it. |
578 | 00:37:18,153 | 00:37:19,153 | Don't stop don't stop! | Don't stop don't stop! |
579 | 00:37:19,404 | 00:37:20,529 | lt won't come out! | lt won't come out! |
580 | 00:37:21,281 | 00:37:25,326 | Yeah. | Yeah. |
581 | 00:37:26,995 | 00:37:28,078 | Oh my God. | Oh my God. |
582 | 00:37:38,548 | 00:37:42,801 | Man old comic books in mint condition for 1 0 cents apiece. | Man old comic books in mint condition for 1 0 cents apiece. |
583 | 00:37:43,345 | 00:37:44,345 | Not bad. | Not bad. |
584 | 00:37:44,596 | 00:37:47,973 | Give Joe Dirt lemonsʼ he gonna make goldenade. | Give Joe Dirt lemonsʼ he gonna make goldenade. |
585 | 00:37:49,684 | 00:37:51,560 | Nah lemonade he gonna make lemonade. | Nah lemonade he gonna make lemonade. |
586 | 00:37:55,732 | 00:37:57,232 | This must be why l'm here. | This must be why l'm here. |
587 | 00:37:58,026 | 00:37:59,026 | To get rich. | To get rich. |
588 | 00:37:59,653 | 00:38:02,738 | So my girls will love me for realʼ instead of the loser that l am. | So my girls will love me for realʼ instead of the loser that l am. |
589 | 00:38:03,907 | 00:38:04,907 | l'll buy 'em presents. | l'll buy 'em presents. |
590 | 00:38:05,533 | 00:38:06,533 | Yeah. | Yeah. |
591 | 00:38:06,618 | 00:38:09,286 | This one is gonna buy Abilene braces. | This one is gonna buy Abilene braces. |
592 | 00:38:10,622 | 00:38:13,916 | This one's gonna buy braces for Dakota. | This one's gonna buy braces for Dakota. |
593 | 00:38:14,793 | 00:38:17,878 | And this one. What can l get Cheyenne? | And this one. What can l get Cheyenne? |
594 | 00:38:18,713 | 00:38:19,713 | l can get braces. | l can get braces. |
595 | 00:38:20,966 | 00:38:26,053 | And this Brandy you're gonna get a new used car! | And this Brandy you're gonna get a new used car! |
596 | 00:38:29,724 | 00:38:33,727 | Don't worry little tree that won't hurt ya. You're gonna grow up big and strong. | Don't worry little tree that won't hurt ya. You're gonna grow up big and strong. |
597 | 00:38:34,646 | 00:38:38,065 | Pretty nice. Take that Home Depot. Life's a garden dig it! | Pretty nice. Take that Home Depot. Life's a garden dig it! |
598 | 00:38:41,403 | 00:38:44,863 | Well that was easy. Now that l'm rich, l'm gonna get back to my trailer. | Well that was easy. Now that l'm rich, l'm gonna get back to my trailer. |
599 | 00:38:45,323 | 00:38:46,657 | 'Cause that's where this whole thing started, | 'Cause that's where this whole thing started, |
600 | 00:38:46,741 | 00:38:49,034 | and maybe that's where this whole thing ends. | and maybe that's where this whole thing ends. |
601 | 00:38:52,580 | 00:38:53,789 | No no no. | No no no. |
602 | 00:38:54,666 | 00:38:56,750 | No no no. Crap. | No no no. Crap. |
603 | 00:39:04,259 | 00:39:05,259 | Well well well. | Well well well. |
604 | 00:39:06,845 | 00:39:07,928 | lf it isn't Joe Dirt. | lf it isn't Joe Dirt. |
605 | 00:39:08,471 | 00:39:09,471 | Hey Foggle. | Hey Foggle. |
606 | 00:39:09,681 | 00:39:13,851 | Now see when l ride with a man like this guyʼ l got a nice thick phonebook between us. | Now see when l ride with a man like this guyʼ l got a nice thick phonebook between us. |
607 | 00:39:13,935 | 00:39:15,769 | Like this thing right here. | Like this thing right here. |
608 | 00:39:16,938 | 00:39:19,106 | That way we're not really touching each other. | That way we're not really touching each other. |
609 | 00:39:20,108 | 00:39:21,108 | Right. | Right. |
610 | 00:39:21,192 | 00:39:24,695 | Now Joe here if he were to ride behind a manʼ | Now Joe here if he were to ride behind a manʼ |
611 | 00:39:25,280 | 00:39:29,908 | he probably wouldn't have a phonebook dividing him from the other man. | he probably wouldn't have a phonebook dividing him from the other man. |
612 | 00:39:31,578 | 00:39:35,956 | No no no. He would say "No l don't need no phonebook in between usʼ | No no no. He would say "No l don't need no phonebook in between usʼ |
613 | 00:39:36,041 | 00:39:37,958 | "because l'd rather be nice and cozy." | "because l'd rather be nice and cozy." |
614 | 00:39:41,296 | 00:39:44,882 | Or if he puts something in between him and the other manʼ | Or if he puts something in between him and the other manʼ |
615 | 00:39:45,300 | 00:39:48,635 | he would want it to be a little bit thinnerʼ like a magazine. | he would want it to be a little bit thinnerʼ like a magazine. |
616 | 00:39:50,472 | 00:39:52,806 | Or like a menu. | Or like a menu. |
617 | 00:39:54,434 | 00:39:57,519 | -A really thin menu. -Like a Kleenex. | -A really thin menu. -Like a Kleenex. |
618 | 00:40:00,565 | 00:40:01,940 | You wish you'd thought of Kleenex. | You wish you'd thought of Kleenex. |
619 | 00:40:02,650 | 00:40:03,650 | l want those boots Joe. | l want those boots Joe. |
620 | 00:40:03,943 | 00:40:05,360 | Foggle look what l'm doing. | Foggle look what l'm doing. |
621 | 00:40:06,321 | 00:40:07,279 | l'm takin' 'em off. | l'm takin' 'em off. |
622 | 00:40:07,363 | 00:40:08,822 | You know you ain't man enough to wear those boots. | You know you ain't man enough to wear those boots. |
623 | 00:40:08,907 | 00:40:10,032 | -You give 'em to me boy. -No. | -You give 'em to me boy. -No. |
624 | 00:40:10,325 | 00:40:13,077 | What if l unzipped and rubbed 'em on my private parts? | What if l unzipped and rubbed 'em on my private parts? |
625 | 00:40:13,995 | 00:40:15,120 | You wouldn't like that! | You wouldn't like that! |
626 | 00:40:15,288 | 00:40:17,081 | You don't put that nowhere near your thingy! | You don't put that nowhere near your thingy! |
627 | 00:40:17,832 | 00:40:18,916 | That scare you? | That scare you? |
628 | 00:40:19,000 | 00:40:21,710 | l'll do it. Yeah l'm crazy l do it! | l'll do it. Yeah l'm crazy l do it! |
629 | 00:40:22,587 | 00:40:27,508 | Look here come the police! Too bad 'cause you're the bad guy l'm the good guy. | Look here come the police! Too bad 'cause you're the bad guy l'm the good guy. |
630 | 00:40:27,675 | 00:40:28,675 | Hey! | Hey! |
631 | 00:40:30,637 | 00:40:31,595 | Are you Joe Dirt? | Are you Joe Dirt? |
632 | 00:40:31,679 | 00:40:35,432 | Yeah hey there hi there ho there Officerʼ what is crappenin'? | Yeah hey there hi there ho there Officerʼ what is crappenin'? |
633 | 00:40:35,892 | 00:40:36,892 | Figured it was you. | Figured it was you. |
634 | 00:40:37,018 | 00:40:39,353 | You had that weird hairdo they said you called a "mullet." | You had that weird hairdo they said you called a "mullet." |
635 | 00:40:39,521 | 00:40:40,896 | Yeah that's me. | Yeah that's me. |
636 | 00:40:41,856 | 00:40:44,483 | Did you buy comic books with this here money? | Did you buy comic books with this here money? |
637 | 00:40:44,609 | 00:40:46,568 | Yeah you know l did that's right. | Yeah you know l did that's right. |
638 | 00:40:46,986 | 00:40:49,154 | Well then you're under arrest for using counterfeit money. | Well then you're under arrest for using counterfeit money. |
639 | 00:40:49,239 | 00:40:52,032 | What no! lt ain't counterfeitʼ it's future money! | What no! lt ain't counterfeitʼ it's future money! |
640 | 00:40:52,408 | 00:40:53,867 | From my future pocket! | From my future pocket! |
641 | 00:40:53,993 | 00:40:55,702 | You just tell that to them down at the station. | You just tell that to them down at the station. |
642 | 00:40:56,079 | 00:40:58,622 | l'm under arrest so those guys can't kill me now! | l'm under arrest so those guys can't kill me now! |
643 | 00:40:59,207 | 00:41:00,833 | -What guys? -Those guys! | -What guys? -Those guys! |
644 | 00:41:02,168 | 00:41:03,794 | See ya later l'm innocent sorry! | See ya later l'm innocent sorry! |
645 | 00:41:03,878 | 00:41:05,003 | Hey get back here! | Hey get back here! |
646 | 00:41:05,088 | 00:41:06,338 | l bumped your car sorry! | l bumped your car sorry! |
647 | 00:41:06,589 | 00:41:07,589 | Come on we gotta go get him. | Come on we gotta go get him. |
648 | 00:41:07,674 | 00:41:10,050 | Pursuit on foot going west on Hartford. | Pursuit on foot going west on Hartford. |
649 | 00:41:10,510 | 00:41:11,885 | lt ain't over Joe Dirt. | lt ain't over Joe Dirt. |
650 | 00:41:12,762 | 00:41:15,139 | We're your personal demons from hell! | We're your personal demons from hell! |
651 | 00:41:17,183 | 00:41:18,183 | Let's go. | Let's go. |
652 | 00:41:18,393 | 00:41:19,560 | Where's my phonebook? | Where's my phonebook? |
653 | 00:41:22,897 | 00:41:26,400 | So I was on the lam. They even let the dogs out on me and everything. | So I was on the lam. They even let the dogs out on me and everything. |
654 | 00:41:26,568 | 00:41:29,820 | But l got away, man, l pretended to be a scarecrow in a field. | But l got away, man, l pretended to be a scarecrow in a field. |
655 | 00:41:30,196 | 00:41:31,905 | Them stupid cops, they never caught me. | Them stupid cops, they never caught me. |
656 | 00:41:32,323 | 00:41:33,407 | What about the dogs? | What about the dogs? |
657 | 00:41:34,450 | 00:41:36,410 | The dogs l dunno l don't remember. | The dogs l dunno l don't remember. |
658 | 00:41:36,703 | 00:41:38,287 | Anyway so there l was on the run. | Anyway so there l was on the run. |
659 | 00:41:38,746 | 00:41:39,913 | Escape from the police. | Escape from the police. |
660 | 00:41:40,248 | 00:41:42,332 | Police dogs have a real good sense of smell. | Police dogs have a real good sense of smell. |
661 | 00:41:42,625 | 00:41:45,836 | Even if you were a scarecrowʼ how could the dogs not find you? | Even if you were a scarecrowʼ how could the dogs not find you? |
662 | 00:41:46,337 | 00:41:47,963 | You know they did find meʼ | You know they did find meʼ |
663 | 00:41:48,214 | 00:41:50,591 | but l got lucky they just walked away. | but l got lucky they just walked away. |
664 | 00:41:51,426 | 00:41:54,845 | How did they just walk away? l mean they just walked away? | How did they just walk away? l mean they just walked away? |
665 | 00:41:55,054 | 00:41:57,931 | They knocked me over on the pole on the ground and they just walked away! | They knocked me over on the pole on the ground and they just walked away! |
666 | 00:41:58,057 | 00:41:59,183 | l dunno they had dog stuff to do. | l dunno they had dog stuff to do. |
667 | 00:41:59,267 | 00:42:00,517 | You're focusing on the wrong part of the story. | You're focusing on the wrong part of the story. |
668 | 00:42:00,602 | 00:42:02,436 | l can't imagine. Why would they just walk away? | l can't imagine. Why would they just walk away? |
669 | 00:42:02,520 | 00:42:05,606 | God dang with the dogs! Who gives a care? | God dang with the dogs! Who gives a care? |
670 | 00:42:06,107 | 00:42:08,817 | The dogs all right you gotta solve the case! | The dogs all right you gotta solve the case! |
671 | 00:42:09,277 | 00:42:11,737 | All right they all humped me is that what you wanna know? | All right they all humped me is that what you wanna know? |
672 | 00:42:12,030 | 00:42:16,033 | You found it out Nancy Drewʼ you solved the case of the horny dogs. | You found it out Nancy Drewʼ you solved the case of the horny dogs. |
673 | 00:42:17,952 | 00:42:18,952 | No no! | No no! |
674 | 00:42:24,209 | 00:42:25,959 | Well glad you got a good chuckle out of it. | Well glad you got a good chuckle out of it. |
675 | 00:42:27,128 | 00:42:29,171 | lt was terrible l was man's best friend! | lt was terrible l was man's best friend! |
676 | 00:42:29,881 | 00:42:32,132 | More like man's best friend with benefits. | More like man's best friend with benefits. |
677 | 00:42:32,675 | 00:42:34,301 | l'm sorry l'm sorry. | l'm sorry l'm sorry. |
678 | 00:42:34,594 | 00:42:38,889 | l don't know if you started the "dogs like to hump people's legs" fadʼ | l don't know if you started the "dogs like to hump people's legs" fadʼ |
679 | 00:42:39,474 | 00:42:43,310 | but think about it you started the shoes on the line and the mullet. | but think about it you started the shoes on the line and the mullet. |
680 | 00:42:44,229 | 00:42:49,483 | You know you might be like the white trash Johnny Appleseed. | You know you might be like the white trash Johnny Appleseed. |
681 | 00:42:50,235 | 00:42:51,777 | Well maybe. | Well maybe. |
682 | 00:42:52,487 | 00:42:55,572 | You know once l extricated myself from the dog pileʼ | You know once l extricated myself from the dog pileʼ |
683 | 00:42:55,865 | 00:42:59,409 | they were done basicallyʼ once they got the money shotʼ | they were done basicallyʼ once they got the money shotʼ |
684 | 00:42:59,702 | 00:43:00,786 | if you get my driftʼ | if you get my driftʼ |
685 | 00:43:01,120 | 00:43:02,162 | which l hope you don't. | which l hope you don't. |
686 | 00:43:02,372 | 00:43:04,456 | -God. -Anywayʼ | -God. -Anywayʼ |
687 | 00:43:04,540 | 00:43:06,917 | so there l was on the run. l was runnin' through the nightʼ | so there l was on the run. l was runnin' through the nightʼ |
688 | 00:43:07,919 | 00:43:08,919 | and you can't believe what l saw. | and you can't believe what l saw. |
689 | 00:43:11,631 | 00:43:12,631 | Ruby's. | Ruby's. |
690 | 00:43:13,383 | 00:43:15,342 | l like any place that sounds like "boobies." | l like any place that sounds like "boobies." |
691 | 00:43:15,677 | 00:43:16,677 | Man. | Man. |
692 | 00:43:16,886 | 00:43:18,262 | Where's the crowd when you need 'em? | Where's the crowd when you need 'em? |
693 | 00:43:18,513 | 00:43:20,055 | l got some LOLs going. | l got some LOLs going. |
694 | 00:43:41,577 | 00:43:44,538 | Man that singer looks like a young Ronnie Van Zant. | Man that singer looks like a young Ronnie Van Zant. |
695 | 00:43:49,627 | 00:43:52,879 | Wait. That's Ronnie. Bob. Gary. | Wait. That's Ronnie. Bob. Gary. |
696 | 00:43:53,548 | 00:43:55,132 | Oh my God! This is Lynyrd Skynyrd! | Oh my God! This is Lynyrd Skynyrd! |
697 | 00:43:55,717 | 00:43:56,800 | Before they were Skynyrd! | Before they were Skynyrd! |
698 | 00:43:57,093 | 00:43:58,385 | What? | What? |
699 | 00:43:58,636 | 00:43:59,720 | Man! | Man! |
700 | 00:44:09,355 | 00:44:11,940 | Man you guys are so good. | Man you guys are so good. |
701 | 00:44:12,358 | 00:44:13,608 | So you really dug our sound? | So you really dug our sound? |
702 | 00:44:14,902 | 00:44:18,238 | l do think you guys have potential. | l do think you guys have potential. |
703 | 00:44:18,448 | 00:44:20,741 | Well cool 'cause we're just barely scratchin' by. | Well cool 'cause we're just barely scratchin' by. |
704 | 00:44:21,075 | 00:44:22,034 | Not makin' a dime. | Not makin' a dime. |
705 | 00:44:22,118 | 00:44:24,286 | Well l think that's all gonna change. | Well l think that's all gonna change. |
706 | 00:44:24,996 | 00:44:28,832 | But l have one criticismʼ and do not take this the wrong way. | But l have one criticismʼ and do not take this the wrong way. |
707 | 00:44:29,292 | 00:44:33,879 | l'm just saying maybe tinker with the name of the band you know? | l'm just saying maybe tinker with the name of the band you know? |
708 | 00:44:34,213 | 00:44:35,213 | You don't like "The Wildcats"? | You don't like "The Wildcats"? |
709 | 00:44:36,466 | 00:44:38,592 | No yeah no l don't. | No yeah no l don't. |
710 | 00:44:38,760 | 00:44:43,638 | Actually because "Wildcats" is too likeʼ generic and boring like any animal. | Actually because "Wildcats" is too likeʼ generic and boring like any animal. |
711 | 00:44:44,223 | 00:44:45,640 | lt's like "meerkatʼ" you know? | lt's like "meerkatʼ" you know? |
712 | 00:44:46,267 | 00:44:47,726 | You know Meerkat Manor? You don't no. | You know Meerkat Manor? You don't no. |
713 | 00:44:48,102 | 00:44:50,896 | But it needs to be more distinct l feel. | But it needs to be more distinct l feel. |
714 | 00:44:51,439 | 00:44:52,397 | -Distinct? -Yeah. | -Distinct? -Yeah. |
715 | 00:44:52,482 | 00:44:55,192 | l mean this is rock and roll. A name means everything man. | l mean this is rock and roll. A name means everything man. |
716 | 00:44:55,276 | 00:44:56,818 | All the cool bands have cool names. | All the cool bands have cool names. |
717 | 00:44:57,195 | 00:44:59,154 | You wanna kick ass you want it to stand out. | You wanna kick ass you want it to stand out. |
718 | 00:44:59,614 | 00:45:03,825 | Wildcats l just don't think it does it man. Do you got any other ideas? | Wildcats l just don't think it does it man. Do you got any other ideas? |
719 | 00:45:04,619 | 00:45:07,913 | Yeah l got one. What about "Wham!"? | Yeah l got one. What about "Wham!"? |
720 | 00:45:08,247 | 00:45:09,664 | "Wham!"? What? | "Wham!"? What? |
721 | 00:45:09,957 | 00:45:11,458 | lt sounds kickass right? | lt sounds kickass right? |
722 | 00:45:11,667 | 00:45:12,793 | lt's like Wham! | lt's like Wham! |
723 | 00:45:13,378 | 00:45:15,712 | lt says if you mess with usʼ we'll beat you down! | lt says if you mess with usʼ we'll beat you down! |
724 | 00:45:16,297 | 00:45:17,422 | We'll blow you away! | We'll blow you away! |
725 | 00:45:17,757 | 00:45:21,134 | We don't care where in a dark alley or in a public toilet. | We don't care where in a dark alley or in a public toilet. |
726 | 00:45:22,136 | 00:45:26,807 | l feel like "Wham!" is just gut instinctʼ not the way to go. | l feel like "Wham!" is just gut instinctʼ not the way to go. |
727 | 00:45:27,058 | 00:45:28,141 | What about "Frankie Goes To Hollywood"? | What about "Frankie Goes To Hollywood"? |
728 | 00:45:28,351 | 00:45:29,351 | Absolutely not. | Absolutely not. |
729 | 00:45:29,519 | 00:45:30,936 | -What about "Cher"? -"Cher"? | -What about "Cher"? -"Cher"? |
730 | 00:45:31,020 | 00:45:32,396 | What about "Air Supply"? | What about "Air Supply"? |
731 | 00:45:32,480 | 00:45:34,147 | Oh my God be real! | Oh my God be real! |
732 | 00:45:34,399 | 00:45:35,774 | -What about "Kajagoogoo"? -What? | -What about "Kajagoogoo"? -What? |
733 | 00:45:35,983 | 00:45:36,983 | "New Kids On The Block"? | "New Kids On The Block"? |
734 | 00:45:37,151 | 00:45:38,318 | What we're getting colder! | What we're getting colder! |
735 | 00:45:38,569 | 00:45:40,278 | Okay you said we're gonna be big right? | Okay you said we're gonna be big right? |
736 | 00:45:40,655 | 00:45:43,031 | Going straight to the top. All right then "One Direction"! | Going straight to the top. All right then "One Direction"! |
737 | 00:45:43,116 | 00:45:44,282 | What is crappenin'? | What is crappenin'? |
738 | 00:45:44,367 | 00:45:46,993 | Nah l'd do "Pet Shop Boysʼ" though. | Nah l'd do "Pet Shop Boysʼ" though. |
739 | 00:45:47,078 | 00:45:50,080 | What about "Spice Boys"? That's pretty good. Yeah. | What about "Spice Boys"? That's pretty good. Yeah. |
740 | 00:45:50,164 | 00:45:52,833 | Come on man we need some contenders here what is this crap? | Come on man we need some contenders here what is this crap? |
741 | 00:45:53,209 | 00:45:55,544 | l got one. Now get ready for this okay? | l got one. Now get ready for this okay? |
742 | 00:45:56,295 | 00:45:57,337 | lt's a little outta left field. | lt's a little outta left field. |
743 | 00:45:57,839 | 00:45:59,256 | But be open-minded. | But be open-minded. |
744 | 00:46:00,383 | 00:46:01,383 | Lynyrd Skynyrd. | Lynyrd Skynyrd. |
745 | 00:46:01,676 | 00:46:03,009 | No. | No. |
746 | 00:46:03,886 | 00:46:04,886 | -Not that guy. -That's like our gym coach's name. | -Not that guy. -That's like our gym coach's name. |
747 | 00:46:05,680 | 00:46:06,680 | We don't even like that guy. | We don't even like that guy. |
748 | 00:46:06,764 | 00:46:09,015 | l know legend has it it's your gym coach. | l know legend has it it's your gym coach. |
749 | 00:46:09,183 | 00:46:10,183 | What legend? | What legend? |
750 | 00:46:11,352 | 00:46:12,352 | That's a long story. | That's a long story. |
751 | 00:46:12,478 | 00:46:16,773 | But seriously guys l know he's your coachʼ but you change it a little bit. | But seriously guys l know he's your coachʼ but you change it a little bit. |
752 | 00:46:17,066 | 00:46:22,237 | You add a "Dʼ" you add a random "Yʼ" another renegade "Y" over hereʼ | You add a "Dʼ" you add a random "Yʼ" another renegade "Y" over hereʼ |
753 | 00:46:22,321 | 00:46:25,490 | and then it's Lynyrd Skynyrd and presto-change-o people remember that! | and then it's Lynyrd Skynyrd and presto-change-o people remember that! |
754 | 00:46:26,075 | 00:46:28,785 | -No that guy gave me lice... -l dunno about Lynyrd Skynyrd man. | -No that guy gave me lice... -l dunno about Lynyrd Skynyrd man. |
755 | 00:46:28,870 | 00:46:31,955 | You remember that time he chased the other coach around in his underwear in the gym? | You remember that time he chased the other coach around in his underwear in the gym? |
756 | 00:46:32,039 | 00:46:33,874 | -The guy's just whacked out. -But you're... | -The guy's just whacked out. -But you're... |
757 | 00:46:42,675 | 00:46:44,426 | Oh my God that's so good. | Oh my God that's so good. |
758 | 00:46:45,595 | 00:46:46,595 | Man. | Man. |
759 | 00:46:47,722 | 00:46:53,560 | Trust me you guys are gonna be bigʼ that song is so perfect l'm telling youʼ | Trust me you guys are gonna be bigʼ that song is so perfect l'm telling youʼ |
760 | 00:46:53,686 | 00:46:57,981 | that's like an anthem like a Southern toe-tapper to say the least man. | that's like an anthem like a Southern toe-tapper to say the least man. |
761 | 00:46:58,566 | 00:47:01,735 | On the huge-ometerʼ it's gonna break the needle. | On the huge-ometerʼ it's gonna break the needle. |
762 | 00:47:02,361 | 00:47:04,779 | -Like a big wedding song? -More like divorce. | -Like a big wedding song? -More like divorce. |
763 | 00:47:04,947 | 00:47:07,532 | Really? Where does it go man? lt's too slow. | Really? Where does it go man? lt's too slow. |
764 | 00:47:07,742 | 00:47:09,159 | Too slow listen to this guy! | Too slow listen to this guy! |
765 | 00:47:10,119 | 00:47:11,661 | Oh my God it's gonna be nine minutes! | Oh my God it's gonna be nine minutes! |
766 | 00:47:11,996 | 00:47:12,996 | Nine-minute tune? | Nine-minute tune? |
767 | 00:47:13,080 | 00:47:16,249 | Yeah l know l mean it could be. lt could be 9:08. | Yeah l know l mean it could be. lt could be 9:08. |
768 | 00:47:16,792 | 00:47:17,792 | Nine minutes eight seconds yeah. | Nine minutes eight seconds yeah. |
769 | 00:47:18,419 | 00:47:20,003 | When you've got it that good don't rush it. | When you've got it that good don't rush it. |
770 | 00:47:20,338 | 00:47:23,507 | What l would doʼ l would talk at the beginning sing singʼ | What l would doʼ l would talk at the beginning sing singʼ |
771 | 00:47:24,008 | 00:47:26,593 | if it's about a bird you knowʼ lettin' it go free. | if it's about a bird you knowʼ lettin' it go free. |
772 | 00:47:26,928 | 00:47:29,596 | And then maybe just kill some time in the middle with an instrumental. | And then maybe just kill some time in the middle with an instrumental. |
773 | 00:47:29,805 | 00:47:32,224 | Like anything. l would probably go... | Like anything. l would probably go... |
774 | 00:47:42,485 | 00:47:43,944 | Yeah. Yeah. | Yeah. Yeah. |
775 | 00:47:45,071 | 00:47:46,321 | Man! You got it! | Man! You got it! |
776 | 00:47:46,614 | 00:47:49,574 | l kid you not like l said you're gonna be rich and famousʼ | l kid you not like l said you're gonna be rich and famousʼ |
777 | 00:47:49,659 | 00:47:51,618 | trust the shit outta me on this one! | trust the shit outta me on this one! |
778 | 00:47:51,786 | 00:47:57,040 | Yeah? Big rock stars with a truck full of money and girls and jammin' into the nightʼ | Yeah? Big rock stars with a truck full of money and girls and jammin' into the nightʼ |
779 | 00:47:57,124 | 00:47:59,459 | -livin' the great life? -You know it man! Exactly! | -livin' the great life? -You know it man! Exactly! |
780 | 00:47:59,794 | 00:48:02,295 | Everyone's gonna look up to youʼ you're gonna have tons of fansʼ | Everyone's gonna look up to youʼ you're gonna have tons of fansʼ |
781 | 00:48:02,588 | 00:48:05,257 | your kids are gonna be proud of youʼ your family's gonna have so much money. | your kids are gonna be proud of youʼ your family's gonna have so much money. |
782 | 00:48:05,591 | 00:48:06,550 | You could buy anything you want. | You could buy anything you want. |
783 | 00:48:06,634 | 00:48:08,510 | -We could buy our own airplane. -Yeah! | -We could buy our own airplane. -Yeah! |
784 | 00:48:14,308 | 00:48:15,308 | What's the matter? | What's the matter? |
785 | 00:48:22,984 | 00:48:24,442 | You guys it was nice to meet you but... | You guys it was nice to meet you but... |
786 | 00:48:28,197 | 00:48:30,699 | You're gonna be great man. l gotta go. | You're gonna be great man. l gotta go. |
787 | 00:48:41,752 | 00:48:44,045 | l was eight years old when l heard about that plane crash. | l was eight years old when l heard about that plane crash. |
788 | 00:48:46,173 | 00:48:49,342 | Just goes to show you never really know what's going on in people's lives. | Just goes to show you never really know what's going on in people's lives. |
789 | 00:48:49,510 | 00:48:52,470 | You know everything could look greatʼ and you could wish you were themʼ | You know everything could look greatʼ and you could wish you were themʼ |
790 | 00:48:53,806 | 00:48:57,142 | -but then... -Sounds like a lesson in there. | -but then... -Sounds like a lesson in there. |
791 | 00:48:59,353 | 00:49:00,812 | Yeah, I know there's a lesson, | Yeah, I know there's a lesson, |
792 | 00:49:00,980 | 00:49:04,190 | and l know l was supposed to walk into that club and meet Skynyrd that night, | and l know l was supposed to walk into that club and meet Skynyrd that night, |
793 | 00:49:04,734 | 00:49:05,984 | but I ain't real smart, | but I ain't real smart, |
794 | 00:49:06,193 | 00:49:08,528 | and my head always feels all jingly jangly, | and my head always feels all jingly jangly, |
795 | 00:49:08,738 | 00:49:12,157 | which is a Southern term meaning, gangly wangly. | which is a Southern term meaning, gangly wangly. |
796 | 00:49:12,366 | 00:49:16,202 | There's always noise in it, like, if people are dropping change in there | There's always noise in it, like, if people are dropping change in there |
797 | 00:49:16,287 | 00:49:18,079 | and not picking up the pennies. | and not picking up the pennies. |
798 | 00:49:18,539 | 00:49:20,373 | lt makes me crazy, man. | lt makes me crazy, man. |
799 | 00:49:20,875 | 00:49:23,168 | But then when l think l'm startin' to figure stuff out, | But then when l think l'm startin' to figure stuff out, |
800 | 00:49:23,252 | 00:49:24,878 | along come these assholes. | along come these assholes. |
801 | 00:49:27,590 | 00:49:29,257 | Let's get us that Joe Dirt! | Let's get us that Joe Dirt! |
802 | 00:49:31,510 | 00:49:33,178 | Get back here with those boots! | Get back here with those boots! |
803 | 00:49:34,889 | 00:49:36,306 | You little bitch. | You little bitch. |
804 | 00:49:37,308 | 00:49:40,852 | Don't you get on that train! | Don't you get on that train! |
805 | 00:49:45,024 | 00:49:46,816 | Take that Foggle! What a burn! | Take that Foggle! What a burn! |
806 | 00:49:51,322 | 00:49:52,322 | Made it. | Made it. |
807 | 00:49:54,075 | 00:49:56,785 | And so there I was, just clickety-clackin' through the night. | And so there I was, just clickety-clackin' through the night. |
808 | 00:49:58,621 | 00:50:03,500 | l got to thinking, how does this Foggle dude and all of them always know where l am? | l got to thinking, how does this Foggle dude and all of them always know where l am? |
809 | 00:50:04,001 | 00:50:06,211 | lt's almost like they're livin' inside my head, you know? | lt's almost like they're livin' inside my head, you know? |
810 | 00:50:06,671 | 00:50:09,047 | l mean, there's definitely a lot of empty space in there. | l mean, there's definitely a lot of empty space in there. |
811 | 00:50:09,256 | 00:50:12,967 | But where would they put their motorcycles, where would they go to the bathroom? | But where would they put their motorcycles, where would they go to the bathroom? |
812 | 00:50:13,052 | 00:50:14,052 | Whatever. | Whatever. |
813 | 00:50:14,929 | 00:50:16,137 | l'm sick of being alone. | l'm sick of being alone. |
814 | 00:50:17,682 | 00:50:19,557 | l wish Brandy was here right now. | l wish Brandy was here right now. |
815 | 00:50:22,103 | 00:50:23,645 | l can pretend she's here. | l can pretend she's here. |
816 | 00:50:25,314 | 00:50:26,690 | l got a few minutes. | l got a few minutes. |
817 | 00:50:29,694 | 00:50:32,654 | Okay. ln the bedroom. | Okay. ln the bedroom. |
818 | 00:50:33,823 | 00:50:37,033 | l come up behind. Tickle her back. | l come up behind. Tickle her back. |
819 | 00:50:37,952 | 00:50:42,122 | Pull that scrunchie out. Yeah get the hair down. | Pull that scrunchie out. Yeah get the hair down. |
820 | 00:50:44,291 | 00:50:46,292 | Pick up the pace pick up the pace. | Pick up the pace pick up the pace. |
821 | 00:50:47,795 | 00:50:48,795 | Sorry buddy. | Sorry buddy. |
822 | 00:50:49,797 | 00:50:50,797 | Had to light my cigar. | Had to light my cigar. |
823 | 00:50:51,632 | 00:50:54,050 | Show was just starting. Keep goin'. | Show was just starting. Keep goin'. |
824 | 00:50:54,135 | 00:50:55,260 | Nah you didn't see nothing. | Nah you didn't see nothing. |
825 | 00:50:55,428 | 00:50:56,511 | Yeah we did. | Yeah we did. |
826 | 00:50:56,637 | 00:50:58,972 | You over there lookin' like a paint shaker goin' at it. | You over there lookin' like a paint shaker goin' at it. |
827 | 00:50:59,056 | 00:51:00,181 | Can we get in on that action? | Can we get in on that action? |
828 | 00:51:00,474 | 00:51:03,685 | Yeah maybe we can figure out some kinda naked pyramid or something. | Yeah maybe we can figure out some kinda naked pyramid or something. |
829 | 00:51:03,769 | 00:51:06,229 | -l like that idea. -Come on little doggy. | -l like that idea. -Come on little doggy. |
830 | 00:51:06,313 | 00:51:09,065 | l ain't no party boy. | l ain't no party boy. |
831 | 00:51:12,611 | 00:51:14,988 | Just a dream. Thank God. | Just a dream. Thank God. |
832 | 00:51:15,990 | 00:51:17,073 | Again? | Again? |
833 | 00:51:17,742 | 00:51:20,827 | But this time not just them. | But this time not just them. |
834 | 00:51:21,495 | 00:51:22,537 | You get us too. | You get us too. |
835 | 00:51:22,872 | 00:51:23,913 | Okay. | Okay. |
836 | 00:51:23,998 | 00:51:25,165 | You like sausages Joe? | You like sausages Joe? |
837 | 00:51:25,416 | 00:51:28,626 | l like sausage l usually get baconʼ but l mix it up. | l like sausage l usually get baconʼ but l mix it up. |
838 | 00:51:28,711 | 00:51:30,336 | l like to have fun at breakfast you know? | l like to have fun at breakfast you know? |
839 | 00:51:30,546 | 00:51:32,672 | Maybe you should take a little nibble off mine. | Maybe you should take a little nibble off mine. |
840 | 00:51:34,300 | 00:51:35,842 | No that's not supposed to be there. | No that's not supposed to be there. |
841 | 00:51:35,968 | 00:51:36,968 | Don't walk here! | Don't walk here! |
842 | 00:51:37,178 | 00:51:38,344 | You guys on Viagra? | You guys on Viagra? |
843 | 00:51:38,804 | 00:51:39,804 | No! | No! |
844 | 00:51:42,558 | 00:51:43,558 | lt's me Joe. | lt's me Joe. |
845 | 00:51:43,851 | 00:51:46,936 | Kicking Wing? Holy crap on a crutch! | Kicking Wing? Holy crap on a crutch! |
846 | 00:51:47,480 | 00:51:50,148 | -What's up? -l missed you. | -What's up? -l missed you. |
847 | 00:51:50,858 | 00:51:53,276 | But they don't call me Kicking Wing anymoreʼ | But they don't call me Kicking Wing anymoreʼ |
848 | 00:51:53,652 | 00:51:54,778 | l'm Kicking Ass. | l'm Kicking Ass. |
849 | 00:51:55,321 | 00:51:58,031 | -l took your advice. -Man! That's a good one. | -l took your advice. -Man! That's a good one. |
850 | 00:51:58,115 | 00:51:59,699 | That's cool l got tons of good ideas man. | That's cool l got tons of good ideas man. |
851 | 00:52:00,034 | 00:52:02,160 | So where have you beenʼ how's the fireworks game? | So where have you beenʼ how's the fireworks game? |
852 | 00:52:03,245 | 00:52:07,081 | l'm not in the fireworks game Joe. Growth potential wasn't enough. | l'm not in the fireworks game Joe. Growth potential wasn't enough. |
853 | 00:52:08,125 | 00:52:09,125 | l'm a drug dealer now. | l'm a drug dealer now. |
854 | 00:52:09,502 | 00:52:11,419 | What! You don't do drugs. | What! You don't do drugs. |
855 | 00:52:11,712 | 00:52:13,296 | l don't get high on my supply. | l don't get high on my supply. |
856 | 00:52:13,631 | 00:52:14,714 | That's catchy. | That's catchy. |
857 | 00:52:15,049 | 00:52:16,257 | Baby who's this clown? | Baby who's this clown? |
858 | 00:52:16,926 | 00:52:19,260 | This is the legendary Joe Dirt! | This is the legendary Joe Dirt! |
859 | 00:52:19,887 | 00:52:20,887 | Good friend! | Good friend! |
860 | 00:52:21,180 | 00:52:22,889 | So you sell heroin and all that kinda crap? | So you sell heroin and all that kinda crap? |
861 | 00:52:23,224 | 00:52:25,558 | No. Just aspirin and weed. | No. Just aspirin and weed. |
862 | 00:52:25,976 | 00:52:28,394 | What! l can get aspirin from a baby! | What! l can get aspirin from a baby! |
863 | 00:52:28,813 | 00:52:31,064 | l can get weed in a vending machine in Denver! | l can get weed in a vending machine in Denver! |
864 | 00:52:31,357 | 00:52:33,399 | 'Cause you know what no one gives a care about weed any more. | 'Cause you know what no one gives a care about weed any more. |
865 | 00:52:33,567 | 00:52:34,567 | Understand rubber band? | Understand rubber band? |
866 | 00:52:35,069 | 00:52:38,404 | Well aspirin and weed is the ones l like. | Well aspirin and weed is the ones l like. |
867 | 00:52:38,572 | 00:52:43,201 | Well that's your problem. You're not sellin' to the mirror my man! | Well that's your problem. You're not sellin' to the mirror my man! |
868 | 00:52:43,661 | 00:52:46,788 | You're forgetting about the consumer! Again. | You're forgetting about the consumer! Again. |
869 | 00:52:46,872 | 00:52:48,248 | l'm a really good drug dealer. | l'm a really good drug dealer. |
870 | 00:52:48,415 | 00:52:53,878 | Kim Possible you're gonna stand thereʼ calling yourself "a really good drug dealerʼ" | Kim Possible you're gonna stand thereʼ calling yourself "a really good drug dealerʼ" |
871 | 00:52:53,963 | 00:52:55,588 | and you ain't got no crystal meth? | and you ain't got no crystal meth? |
872 | 00:52:55,673 | 00:52:56,673 | No black tar? | No black tar? |
873 | 00:52:56,757 | 00:52:58,383 | These are the basics! | These are the basics! |
874 | 00:52:58,759 | 00:53:03,888 | No Xanny bars? White crosses? Special K? Moon rocks? No zip-its pop-its whippits? | No Xanny bars? White crosses? Special K? Moon rocks? No zip-its pop-its whippits? |
875 | 00:53:04,265 | 00:53:09,519 | Black beauties or cocaine? Also known as yayo power flour talk chalk devil's dandruff | Black beauties or cocaine? Also known as yayo power flour talk chalk devil's dandruff |
876 | 00:53:09,603 | 00:53:10,895 | or sniffy jiffy? | or sniffy jiffy? |
877 | 00:53:11,522 | 00:53:13,356 | -No. -No shanaynay? | -No. -No shanaynay? |
878 | 00:53:13,607 | 00:53:14,607 | No vajayjay? | No vajayjay? |
879 | 00:53:14,859 | 00:53:17,443 | No. Just aspirins and weed. | No. Just aspirins and weed. |
880 | 00:53:17,653 | 00:53:21,197 | So you're supposed to be taken seriously in your chosen new profession? | So you're supposed to be taken seriously in your chosen new profession? |
881 | 00:53:21,407 | 00:53:24,909 | And you don't move no purple microdot? No gold paint to huff? | And you don't move no purple microdot? No gold paint to huff? |
882 | 00:53:25,327 | 00:53:26,327 | No angel dust? | No angel dust? |
883 | 00:53:26,412 | 00:53:29,080 | PCP? Molly? Charlie? Charlie Car? Crank? | PCP? Molly? Charlie? Charlie Car? Crank? |
884 | 00:53:29,164 | 00:53:31,916 | lce? Crack? Boom? Pow? Shnizzle? Zoomers? | lce? Crack? Boom? Pow? Shnizzle? Zoomers? |
885 | 00:53:32,001 | 00:53:33,126 | Boomers? Husker Dus? | Boomers? Husker Dus? |
886 | 00:53:34,128 | 00:53:35,879 | Wait l think that's a firecracker isn't it? | Wait l think that's a firecracker isn't it? |
887 | 00:53:36,297 | 00:53:37,297 | No it's both. | No it's both. |
888 | 00:53:37,423 | 00:53:42,552 | No yellowjackets morning wood or one single bottle of codeine cough syrup? | No yellowjackets morning wood or one single bottle of codeine cough syrup? |
889 | 00:53:43,137 | 00:53:44,804 | With or without the Jolly Rancher. | With or without the Jolly Rancher. |
890 | 00:53:45,055 | 00:53:46,598 | You must get high all the time. | You must get high all the time. |
891 | 00:53:46,974 | 00:53:47,974 | You seem psycho. | You seem psycho. |
892 | 00:53:48,559 | 00:53:49,559 | Wait was this a dream? | Wait was this a dream? |
893 | 00:53:49,810 | 00:53:50,977 | Yeah this is gonna be a dream. | Yeah this is gonna be a dream. |
894 | 00:53:51,353 | 00:53:53,646 | Then l can say somethin' mean back. All right say it again. | Then l can say somethin' mean back. All right say it again. |
895 | 00:53:54,023 | 00:53:55,773 | You must get high all the time. You seem psycho. | You must get high all the time. You seem psycho. |
896 | 00:53:56,275 | 00:53:58,359 | You must bone a lot of dudes. You seem like a whore. | You must bone a lot of dudes. You seem like a whore. |
897 | 00:54:04,116 | 00:54:06,367 | -l do. -Backfire! | -l do. -Backfire! |
898 | 00:54:06,994 | 00:54:09,245 | l'm so glad this is a dream and you ain't a drug dealer! | l'm so glad this is a dream and you ain't a drug dealer! |
899 | 00:54:09,580 | 00:54:11,205 | You're right Joe it is a dream. | You're right Joe it is a dream. |
900 | 00:54:11,290 | 00:54:13,833 | Come on Kicking Ass kick him off the trainʼ l wanna get high. | Come on Kicking Ass kick him off the trainʼ l wanna get high. |
901 | 00:54:14,376 | 00:54:17,879 | Don't you understand Joe? This whole dream represents you trying to become | Don't you understand Joe? This whole dream represents you trying to become |
902 | 00:54:17,963 | 00:54:19,589 | something you shouldn't be. | something you shouldn't be. |
903 | 00:54:21,967 | 00:54:23,217 | Think about that Joe. | Think about that Joe. |
904 | 00:54:25,596 | 00:54:28,556 | Man, it was great to see Kicking Wing, but not as a drug dealer. | Man, it was great to see Kicking Wing, but not as a drug dealer. |
905 | 00:54:29,308 | 00:54:32,852 | And that's when it hit me. What he was trying to tell me! | And that's when it hit me. What he was trying to tell me! |
906 | 00:54:33,395 | 00:54:36,439 | What he wanted me to figure out was... Then l got sleepy. | What he wanted me to figure out was... Then l got sleepy. |
907 | 00:54:38,442 | 00:54:39,984 | Yo! Molly Mulletson. | Yo! Molly Mulletson. |
908 | 00:54:41,487 | 00:54:43,863 | lt's me the clumsy segue fairy. | lt's me the clumsy segue fairy. |
909 | 00:54:44,698 | 00:54:45,657 | You're dreamin'. | You're dreamin'. |
910 | 00:54:45,741 | 00:54:49,035 | We're inside a dream that's inside a daydream | We're inside a dream that's inside a daydream |
911 | 00:54:49,536 | 00:54:52,872 | that's being influenced by a vague sense of ennui. | that's being influenced by a vague sense of ennui. |
912 | 00:54:53,040 | 00:54:56,125 | And this is Joe Dirt 2, and why have we overwritten this? | And this is Joe Dirt 2, and why have we overwritten this? |
913 | 00:54:56,293 | 00:54:59,921 | Now go back to sleep you're gonna wake up in the middle of nowhere. | Now go back to sleep you're gonna wake up in the middle of nowhere. |
914 | 00:55:00,214 | 00:55:01,214 | REM. | REM. |
915 | 00:55:01,882 | 00:55:05,301 | Them dreams is trying to tell me somethin'. Especially Kicking Wing! | Them dreams is trying to tell me somethin'. Especially Kicking Wing! |
916 | 00:55:05,678 | 00:55:07,720 | I don't even know what Zander Kelly was doin' in there. | I don't even know what Zander Kelly was doin' in there. |
917 | 00:55:07,930 | 00:55:10,682 | And I have no idea what "on we" means either. | And I have no idea what "on we" means either. |
918 | 00:55:11,225 | 00:55:13,893 | All in all, I was startin' to feel like Alice in Wonderland. | All in all, I was startin' to feel like Alice in Wonderland. |
919 | 00:55:14,103 | 00:55:15,895 | You know, if Alice was a cool dude | You know, if Alice was a cool dude |
920 | 00:55:16,021 | 00:55:19,649 | and Wonderland was a place where everyone benches a lot. | and Wonderland was a place where everyone benches a lot. |
921 | 00:55:20,317 | 00:55:21,317 | You're cool, and... | You're cool, and... |
922 | 00:55:22,152 | 00:55:25,238 | Yeah, that's a bad comparison, but things was definitely getting weirder. | Yeah, that's a bad comparison, but things was definitely getting weirder. |
923 | 00:55:27,658 | 00:55:29,450 | Hey guys what's crappenin'? | Hey guys what's crappenin'? |
924 | 00:55:30,077 | 00:55:31,077 | What's your name? | What's your name? |
925 | 00:55:31,954 | 00:55:36,582 | Well listen it's a bit unusual and l've heard all the jokes | Well listen it's a bit unusual and l've heard all the jokes |
926 | 00:55:36,875 | 00:55:39,085 | and l've heard them about my hairʼ so you might as well skip it. | and l've heard them about my hairʼ so you might as well skip it. |
927 | 00:55:39,420 | 00:55:40,420 | lt's Joe Dirt. | lt's Joe Dirt. |
928 | 00:55:40,879 | 00:55:43,923 | Dirt? That's a pretty shitty nameʼ don't you think? | Dirt? That's a pretty shitty nameʼ don't you think? |
929 | 00:55:44,008 | 00:55:45,174 | Yeah l guess we're not going to skip it. | Yeah l guess we're not going to skip it. |
930 | 00:55:45,259 | 00:55:49,429 | Yeah listen it could've been Connor or Willow or Aiden or Jaden | Yeah listen it could've been Connor or Willow or Aiden or Jaden |
931 | 00:55:49,555 | 00:55:51,097 | or maybe Colby or Tristan... | or maybe Colby or Tristan... |
932 | 00:55:51,432 | 00:55:52,432 | How's your health? | How's your health? |
933 | 00:55:53,058 | 00:55:54,767 | That's a bit personal. | That's a bit personal. |
934 | 00:55:55,310 | 00:55:58,813 | My health is good l feel like it might get worse in a few minutes... | My health is good l feel like it might get worse in a few minutes... |
935 | 00:55:59,356 | 00:56:00,356 | You ain't a smoker huh? | You ain't a smoker huh? |
936 | 00:56:01,233 | 00:56:03,109 | No but l do dip Skoal. | No but l do dip Skoal. |
937 | 00:56:03,277 | 00:56:04,944 | Just a pinch between my cheek and gum. | Just a pinch between my cheek and gum. |
938 | 00:56:05,237 | 00:56:07,572 | l've tried Cope you know between us. | l've tried Cope you know between us. |
939 | 00:56:08,073 | 00:56:10,533 | But it's a little strong. l get dizzy. | But it's a little strong. l get dizzy. |
940 | 00:56:10,784 | 00:56:13,411 | l like to call it the poor man's amusement ride. | l like to call it the poor man's amusement ride. |
941 | 00:56:13,912 | 00:56:15,371 | You're about to go on a big ride. | You're about to go on a big ride. |
942 | 00:56:37,519 | 00:56:39,437 | Bright light! | Bright light! |
943 | 00:56:44,443 | 00:56:46,027 | Sore to the touch! | Sore to the touch! |
944 | 00:56:47,488 | 00:56:50,323 | Somebody's getting a bad stitchin' award. | Somebody's getting a bad stitchin' award. |
945 | 00:56:50,866 | 00:56:51,866 | What did they do? | What did they do? |
946 | 00:56:56,038 | 00:56:59,040 | Seashell? l'm at the beach! | Seashell? l'm at the beach! |
947 | 00:57:01,251 | 00:57:02,794 | Sandcastle time! | Sandcastle time! |
948 | 00:57:04,296 | 00:57:07,507 | -So they harvested me. -What? | -So they harvested me. -What? |
949 | 00:57:08,342 | 00:57:09,342 | Yeah. | Yeah. |
950 | 00:57:09,635 | 00:57:13,179 | -Harvested you? -Yeah they dug deep. They got my kidneyʼ | -Harvested you? -Yeah they dug deep. They got my kidneyʼ |
951 | 00:57:14,014 | 00:57:16,015 | they got my gallbladderʼ they got some liver parts. | they got my gallbladderʼ they got some liver parts. |
952 | 00:57:16,100 | 00:57:18,184 | l guess they were making some cat food or something l dunno. | l guess they were making some cat food or something l dunno. |
953 | 00:57:18,477 | 00:57:21,354 | l thought that was just like an urban legend. | l thought that was just like an urban legend. |
954 | 00:57:21,688 | 00:57:23,147 | -How creepy. -Yeah. Yeah. | -How creepy. -Yeah. Yeah. |
955 | 00:57:23,273 | 00:57:25,108 | You know maybe l started that. | You know maybe l started that. |
956 | 00:57:25,776 | 00:57:29,904 | After the surgery they left all kinds of crap inside me like you know. | After the surgery they left all kinds of crap inside me like you know. |
957 | 00:57:30,155 | 00:57:31,948 | -On accident l'm guessin'. -What? | -On accident l'm guessin'. -What? |
958 | 00:57:32,366 | 00:57:37,745 | They left scissors inside meʼ they left a hamburger wrapperʼ | They left scissors inside meʼ they left a hamburger wrapperʼ |
959 | 00:57:38,664 | 00:57:42,166 | 39 cents in change and some of those plastic pluggy things | 39 cents in change and some of those plastic pluggy things |
960 | 00:57:42,251 | 00:57:44,252 | that you stick in a corn cob to hold it better? | that you stick in a corn cob to hold it better? |
961 | 00:57:44,837 | 00:57:48,005 | Also one of them cans that says moo when you turn it upside down? | Also one of them cans that says moo when you turn it upside down? |
962 | 00:57:48,549 | 00:57:50,299 | -No. -You say no? | -No. -You say no? |
963 | 00:57:50,884 | 00:57:51,884 | Hang on. | Hang on. |
964 | 00:57:53,679 | 00:57:54,679 | There we go. | There we go. |
965 | 00:57:58,058 | 00:57:59,058 | lt's nice to see you laughin'. | lt's nice to see you laughin'. |
966 | 00:57:59,309 | 00:58:02,937 | My little girls would laugh so hard at that. They'd think it's so funny. | My little girls would laugh so hard at that. They'd think it's so funny. |
967 | 00:58:04,690 | 00:58:05,690 | l wish l could hear that. | l wish l could hear that. |
968 | 00:58:06,233 | 00:58:09,735 | -So where was this beach? -Actually it was a desert island. | -So where was this beach? -Actually it was a desert island. |
969 | 00:58:10,237 | 00:58:11,737 | l was there a long time. | l was there a long time. |
970 | 00:58:12,531 | 00:58:16,033 | About 12 years. | About 12 years. |
971 | 00:58:20,289 | 00:58:23,666 | "Dear Whoever Finds This Message in a Bottle, l'm trapped | "Dear Whoever Finds This Message in a Bottle, l'm trapped |
972 | 00:58:23,750 | 00:58:27,253 | "on a desert island, and l'm losing hope of ever being found, man. | "on a desert island, and l'm losing hope of ever being found, man. |
973 | 00:58:28,172 | 00:58:33,092 | "l probably just wasted time writing the word 'man,' it wasn't a necessary word | "l probably just wasted time writing the word 'man,' it wasn't a necessary word |
974 | 00:58:33,177 | 00:58:35,344 | "and I don't have much ink, so that's dumb. | "and I don't have much ink, so that's dumb. |
975 | 00:58:43,812 | 00:58:45,313 | "l'm using my own blood. | "l'm using my own blood. |
976 | 00:58:45,856 | 00:58:48,816 | "I'm crossing off 'man.' Sorry for the mess. | "I'm crossing off 'man.' Sorry for the mess. |
977 | 00:58:48,901 | 00:58:51,777 | "As l gaze out to sea at the rocks that look like | "As l gaze out to sea at the rocks that look like |
978 | 00:58:51,862 | 00:58:54,238 | "a giant church steeple, it makes me think of | "a giant church steeple, it makes me think of |
979 | 00:58:54,323 | 00:58:56,657 | "the day l married the love of my life, Brandy. | "the day l married the love of my life, Brandy. |
980 | 00:58:57,826 | 00:59:02,663 | "l miss her. l miss my girls. l'm lonely out my ass. | "l miss her. l miss my girls. l'm lonely out my ass. |
981 | 00:59:03,123 | 00:59:05,833 | "l hope somebody gets this and replies. | "l hope somebody gets this and replies. |
982 | 00:59:05,918 | 00:59:09,795 | "PS, No smokers. I'm just kidding. | "PS, No smokers. I'm just kidding. |
983 | 00:59:10,130 | 00:59:13,633 | "Signed, Joe Dirtay. | "Signed, Joe Dirtay. |
984 | 00:59:19,848 | 00:59:24,477 | "PPS, AKA Joe Dirt. I ain't foolin' nobody with the Dirtay thing. l'll give up on it." | "PPS, AKA Joe Dirt. I ain't foolin' nobody with the Dirtay thing. l'll give up on it." |
985 | 01:00:39,928 | 01:00:41,762 | Tastes like jellyfish. | Tastes like jellyfish. |
986 | 01:00:44,516 | 01:00:46,642 | Oh yeah. You like that Wilson? | Oh yeah. You like that Wilson? |
987 | 01:00:46,727 | 01:00:49,395 | You're not getting away! Yeah take that! | You're not getting away! Yeah take that! |
988 | 01:00:49,604 | 01:00:52,773 | Okay this one goes out to all the angel fish out there. | Okay this one goes out to all the angel fish out there. |
989 | 01:00:52,858 | 01:00:55,401 | You know who you are. Let them in the front. Come on now. | You know who you are. Let them in the front. Come on now. |
990 | 01:01:03,035 | 01:01:04,327 | You like that shell? | You like that shell? |
991 | 01:01:04,411 | 01:01:07,163 | Hey which way out? l need an exit sign. | Hey which way out? l need an exit sign. |
992 | 01:01:07,873 | 01:01:08,873 | There you are. | There you are. |
993 | 01:01:09,791 | 01:01:12,418 | Sorry for the delay folks. l took a crap. | Sorry for the delay folks. l took a crap. |
994 | 01:01:14,254 | 01:01:17,548 | l buried it. l put some sand on it. lt's not totally gone but... | l buried it. l put some sand on it. lt's not totally gone but... |
995 | 01:01:18,884 | 01:01:20,801 | Nobody go looking for it. l didn't think you would. | Nobody go looking for it. l didn't think you would. |
996 | 01:01:41,948 | 01:01:43,616 | l hope this is mine. | l hope this is mine. |
997 | 01:01:49,414 | 01:01:53,042 | "Dear Joe Dirt, you sound so lonely and lost. | "Dear Joe Dirt, you sound so lonely and lost. |
998 | 01:01:53,126 | 01:01:56,170 | "And as l gaze out of my Marriott Hotel window, | "And as l gaze out of my Marriott Hotel window, |
999 | 01:01:56,254 | 01:01:59,840 | "l can see the same church-steeple rocks you mention in your letter. | "l can see the same church-steeple rocks you mention in your letter. |
1000 | 01:01:59,925 | 01:02:02,385 | "Anyway, what hotel are you staying in? | "Anyway, what hotel are you staying in? |
1001 | 01:02:02,469 | 01:02:05,304 | "I'm in room 347. Write me back or call." | "I'm in room 347. Write me back or call." |
1002 | 01:02:05,889 | 01:02:07,264 | Marriott? | Marriott? |
1003 | 01:02:08,600 | 01:02:10,142 | What the fuck! | What the fuck! |
1004 | 01:02:26,159 | 01:02:31,455 | Twelve years l missed going to effingʼ freaking fucking Taco Bell? | Twelve years l missed going to effingʼ freaking fucking Taco Bell? |
1005 | 01:02:32,707 | 01:02:34,500 | Hey mister. | Hey mister. |
1006 | 01:02:35,001 | 01:02:36,252 | Are you bigfoot? | Are you bigfoot? |
1007 | 01:02:36,336 | 01:02:38,963 | What? No man. No l'm not bigfoot. | What? No man. No l'm not bigfoot. |
1008 | 01:02:39,339 | 01:02:40,339 | l'm tired-foot. | l'm tired-foot. |
1009 | 01:02:40,715 | 01:02:44,593 | Hey bigfoot why did you climb all those rocks over there instead of using this trail? | Hey bigfoot why did you climb all those rocks over there instead of using this trail? |
1010 | 01:02:45,846 | 01:02:48,597 | -What year is it? -lt's 1 977 bigfoot. | -What year is it? -lt's 1 977 bigfoot. |
1011 | 01:02:48,682 | 01:02:50,933 | Man what city am l in? | Man what city am l in? |
1012 | 01:02:51,184 | 01:02:52,226 | lt's Miami bigfoot. | lt's Miami bigfoot. |
1013 | 01:02:52,686 | 01:02:53,686 | Man. | Man. |
1014 | 01:02:54,187 | 01:02:56,313 | l need to go down just to wipe. | l need to go down just to wipe. |
1015 | 01:02:56,398 | 01:02:59,817 | lt's rough down there. l've been wiping with seaweed and clamshells for 1 2 years. | lt's rough down there. l've been wiping with seaweed and clamshells for 1 2 years. |
1016 | 01:02:59,901 | 01:03:01,318 | Gross bigfoot. | Gross bigfoot. |
1017 | 01:03:01,528 | 01:03:03,737 | -Bye bigfoot. -You gotta get going? Okay. | -Bye bigfoot. -You gotta get going? Okay. |
1018 | 01:03:03,822 | 01:03:05,614 | Yeah see ya later bigfoot. | Yeah see ya later bigfoot. |
1019 | 01:03:05,740 | 01:03:07,658 | Okay. l'll catch ya later. | Okay. l'll catch ya later. |
1020 | 01:03:07,784 | 01:03:09,785 | Maybe l'll write it in a bottle and throw it to ya. | Maybe l'll write it in a bottle and throw it to ya. |
1021 | 01:03:09,870 | 01:03:11,829 | l'm kidding. Wait is this the way down? | l'm kidding. Wait is this the way down? |
1022 | 01:03:18,795 | 01:03:22,006 | Twenty-seven cents for all-new JD threads. | Twenty-seven cents for all-new JD threads. |
1023 | 01:03:22,090 | 01:03:25,259 | Now l just gotta get the bugs out of my hair. | Now l just gotta get the bugs out of my hair. |
1024 | 01:03:32,392 | 01:03:35,060 | Skynyrd man. Those poor guys. | Skynyrd man. Those poor guys. |
1025 | 01:03:35,562 | 01:03:39,106 | l'm complaining about my stupid problemsʼ and these guys... | l'm complaining about my stupid problemsʼ and these guys... |
1026 | 01:03:39,191 | 01:03:42,401 | Screw them man! l was on an island for 1 0 years. l'm in Florida! | Screw them man! l was on an island for 1 0 years. l'm in Florida! |
1027 | 01:03:42,736 | 01:03:46,238 | What a dumb crap! l just get stupider! | What a dumb crap! l just get stupider! |
1028 | 01:03:47,824 | 01:03:50,743 | Wait a second. ls that dude Clem? | Wait a second. ls that dude Clem? |
1029 | 01:03:51,036 | 01:03:52,328 | Wait that's Clem! | Wait that's Clem! |
1030 | 01:03:52,704 | 01:03:53,704 | Hey Clem! | Hey Clem! |
1031 | 01:03:54,915 | 01:03:55,915 | l'm sorry excuse me. | l'm sorry excuse me. |
1032 | 01:03:58,335 | 01:03:59,585 | Hey hey Clem. | Hey hey Clem. |
1033 | 01:04:00,754 | 01:04:02,254 | Frank Frank Frank Frank. | Frank Frank Frank Frank. |
1034 | 01:04:02,339 | 01:04:03,339 | Clem hey. | Clem hey. |
1035 | 01:04:03,924 | 01:04:08,177 | Mr. Bennedetti l'm sorry. My name's Joe Dirtʼ l'm from the future. l know it sounds crazy. | Mr. Bennedetti l'm sorry. My name's Joe Dirtʼ l'm from the future. l know it sounds crazy. |
1036 | 01:04:08,970 | 01:04:10,471 | l heard about the future. | l heard about the future. |
1037 | 01:04:10,805 | 01:04:15,017 | Everybody's got a big head right? Enlarged. Eat pills to live. | Everybody's got a big head right? Enlarged. Eat pills to live. |
1038 | 01:04:15,852 | 01:04:17,102 | You fly around with a jetpack. | You fly around with a jetpack. |
1039 | 01:04:18,480 | 01:04:22,566 | Not quite yet. l mean we have a Bedazzler. | Not quite yet. l mean we have a Bedazzler. |
1040 | 01:04:23,109 | 01:04:26,779 | Jetpacks are not at the Walmart just as of now. | Jetpacks are not at the Walmart just as of now. |
1041 | 01:04:27,113 | 01:04:28,656 | But we have the Cronut. | But we have the Cronut. |
1042 | 01:04:28,823 | 01:04:33,327 | lt's really doing well. l ate 30 once. l was drunk. lt was like 28 but l brag and say 30. | lt's really doing well. l ate 30 once. l was drunk. lt was like 28 but l brag and say 30. |
1043 | 01:04:33,787 | 01:04:37,581 | But here's the real thing in the future l just want to tell you it sounds crazy l knowʼ | But here's the real thing in the future l just want to tell you it sounds crazy l knowʼ |
1044 | 01:04:37,707 | 01:04:38,707 | but we're friends. | but we're friends. |
1045 | 01:04:38,959 | 01:04:40,251 | You're like a dad to me. | You're like a dad to me. |
1046 | 01:04:40,335 | 01:04:44,296 | l mean we hang out and you live in Silvertown. You save me from bullies. | l mean we hang out and you live in Silvertown. You save me from bullies. |
1047 | 01:04:44,714 | 01:04:47,925 | Vinny whack this kid. He's talking nonsense. | Vinny whack this kid. He's talking nonsense. |
1048 | 01:04:48,218 | 01:04:52,763 | Then dump his body in a trunkʼ then dump his crazy hair in a different trunk. | Then dump his body in a trunkʼ then dump his crazy hair in a different trunk. |
1049 | 01:04:53,181 | 01:04:55,432 | -You got it Uncle Frank. -No no Mr. Vinny wait one sec... | -You got it Uncle Frank. -No no Mr. Vinny wait one sec... |
1050 | 01:04:55,767 | 01:04:57,476 | l'm telling you l'm from the future. l'll prove it. | l'm telling you l'm from the future. l'll prove it. |
1051 | 01:04:57,936 | 01:04:58,936 | There's a TA. | There's a TA. |
1052 | 01:04:59,312 | 01:05:00,563 | What's that NASCAR? | What's that NASCAR? |
1053 | 01:05:00,647 | 01:05:01,647 | l know NASCAR. | l know NASCAR. |
1054 | 01:05:01,940 | 01:05:05,985 | That's Daytona 500 l bet. l can tell you who wins. ls that good? | That's Daytona 500 l bet. l can tell you who wins. ls that good? |
1055 | 01:05:06,778 | 01:05:09,780 | lf this was trueʼ you would become very important. | lf this was trueʼ you would become very important. |
1056 | 01:05:10,198 | 01:05:13,033 | You've got five seconds. l start counting on three. | You've got five seconds. l start counting on three. |
1057 | 01:05:13,201 | 01:05:15,619 | What? Wait what happened to one and two? | What? Wait what happened to one and two? |
1058 | 01:05:15,745 | 01:05:17,329 | l had them whacked. Four. | l had them whacked. Four. |
1059 | 01:05:17,414 | 01:05:19,123 | Wait. God... Okay hold on. | Wait. God... Okay hold on. |
1060 | 01:05:20,000 | 01:05:24,378 | Daytona Speedway 1 977. That's oh my God Richard Petty l think. | Daytona Speedway 1 977. That's oh my God Richard Petty l think. |
1061 | 01:05:24,462 | 01:05:25,421 | STP car. | STP car. |
1062 | 01:05:25,505 | 01:05:29,633 | Then you got Darrel Waltrip in Gatorade. AJ Foyt is third. | Then you got Darrel Waltrip in Gatorade. AJ Foyt is third. |
1063 | 01:05:29,718 | 01:05:32,970 | -Then Donnie Allison and who's fifth? -Five. | -Then Donnie Allison and who's fifth? -Five. |
1064 | 01:05:33,138 | 01:05:36,473 | Cale Yarborough! Go! Yeah! Yeah! | Cale Yarborough! Go! Yeah! Yeah! |
1065 | 01:05:36,641 | 01:05:37,641 | Yeah! | Yeah! |
1066 | 01:05:39,853 | 01:05:43,522 | Guys we just found a goose that lays the golden eggs. | Guys we just found a goose that lays the golden eggs. |
1067 | 01:05:44,024 | 01:05:46,525 | -l laid 'em. -This goose's name is what? | -l laid 'em. -This goose's name is what? |
1068 | 01:05:46,693 | 01:05:48,986 | -l'm Joe Dirt! -Joe Dirt. | -l'm Joe Dirt! -Joe Dirt. |
1069 | 01:05:49,863 | 01:05:50,863 | Joe Dirt. | Joe Dirt. |
1070 | 01:05:51,698 | 01:05:52,698 | Okay. | Okay. |
1071 | 01:05:54,367 | 01:05:55,367 | lt's all right. | lt's all right. |
1072 | 01:06:09,257 | 01:06:11,050 | This was all paying off. | This was all paying off. |
1073 | 01:06:12,802 | 01:06:14,553 | We was getting richer. | We was getting richer. |
1074 | 01:06:16,139 | 01:06:17,723 | l was getting richer. | l was getting richer. |
1075 | 01:06:31,029 | 01:06:33,989 | -Look, l did a perfect cartwheel. -Dad, l bet you can't do that. | -Look, l did a perfect cartwheel. -Dad, l bet you can't do that. |
1076 | 01:06:34,324 | 01:06:37,076 | -Daddy... -But l was missing my family. | -Daddy... -But l was missing my family. |
1077 | 01:06:37,869 | 01:06:39,870 | Really missing them, something awful. | Really missing them, something awful. |
1078 | 01:06:40,038 | 01:06:41,622 | ...a perfect cartwheel. Dad, have you ever... | ...a perfect cartwheel. Dad, have you ever... |
1079 | 01:06:41,748 | 01:06:44,375 | lt sounds crazy, but I recorded a bunch of actresses | lt sounds crazy, but I recorded a bunch of actresses |
1080 | 01:06:44,459 | 01:06:47,503 | doing a little jibber-jabber, to remind me of home. | doing a little jibber-jabber, to remind me of home. |
1081 | 01:06:47,587 | 01:06:49,963 | -I can do somersaults. -Hey, Joe Dirt, watch my cartwheel. | -I can do somersaults. -Hey, Joe Dirt, watch my cartwheel. |
1082 | 01:06:50,090 | 01:06:53,175 | Wait, no, not Joe Dirt. Daddy, watch my cartwheel! | Wait, no, not Joe Dirt. Daddy, watch my cartwheel! |
1083 | 01:06:53,468 | 01:06:56,011 | Dad, look, l can do a back handspring! Can you do a flip, too? | Dad, look, l can do a back handspring! Can you do a flip, too? |
1084 | 01:06:57,430 | 01:06:58,430 | So anyways that's the whole story. | So anyways that's the whole story. |
1085 | 01:06:59,265 | 01:07:03,102 | l know you believe me 'cause all those races l predicted and stuff came true. | l know you believe me 'cause all those races l predicted and stuff came true. |
1086 | 01:07:03,478 | 01:07:06,772 | Anyway Clem. l know the futureʼ and l know something about youʼ | Anyway Clem. l know the futureʼ and l know something about youʼ |
1087 | 01:07:06,898 | 01:07:08,607 | and l know something about your wife. | and l know something about your wife. |
1088 | 01:07:09,234 | 01:07:12,277 | We must not know. We're not supposed to know | We must not know. We're not supposed to know |
1089 | 01:07:12,362 | 01:07:14,571 | the future that is laid out for us. | the future that is laid out for us. |
1090 | 01:07:14,864 | 01:07:18,283 | Because choices must remain for us to make. | Because choices must remain for us to make. |
1091 | 01:07:18,702 | 01:07:20,035 | That's how it must be. | That's how it must be. |
1092 | 01:07:20,120 | 01:07:22,955 | What are you saying that if you could learn what's gonna happen in the futureʼ | What are you saying that if you could learn what's gonna happen in the futureʼ |
1093 | 01:07:23,039 | 01:07:24,206 | you don't even want to know? | you don't even want to know? |
1094 | 01:07:24,624 | 01:07:27,459 | Each day must remain without horizon. | Each day must remain without horizon. |
1095 | 01:07:28,461 | 01:07:30,129 | We save it for the now. | We save it for the now. |
1096 | 01:07:30,797 | 01:07:35,718 | Okay yeah. l know what you're saying. That you never know how hot it is | Okay yeah. l know what you're saying. That you never know how hot it is |
1097 | 01:07:35,802 | 01:07:37,886 | until you lose your shade tree. | until you lose your shade tree. |
1098 | 01:07:37,971 | 01:07:41,181 | No. l speak with more elegance than that. | No. l speak with more elegance than that. |
1099 | 01:07:41,433 | 01:07:46,145 | l'm not talking trifles from a calendar or a bumper sticker or a poster of that cat. | l'm not talking trifles from a calendar or a bumper sticker or a poster of that cat. |
1100 | 01:07:46,271 | 01:07:47,604 | You've seen it. lt's everywhere. | You've seen it. lt's everywhere. |
1101 | 01:07:47,689 | 01:07:52,359 | A cat hangs upside down from a tree. Underneath the cat it says "Hang in there." | A cat hangs upside down from a tree. Underneath the cat it says "Hang in there." |
1102 | 01:07:52,736 | 01:07:54,278 | -Right. -This is nonsense. | -Right. -This is nonsense. |
1103 | 01:07:54,362 | 01:07:57,781 | The cat must not just hang there. The cat must go fix its problems. | The cat must not just hang there. The cat must go fix its problems. |
1104 | 01:07:57,866 | 01:08:01,160 | The cat must find the thing that gives it trouble | The cat must find the thing that gives it trouble |
1105 | 01:08:01,536 | 01:08:04,288 | and smack that thing in the side of the head with a brick. | and smack that thing in the side of the head with a brick. |
1106 | 01:08:05,123 | 01:08:08,375 | The cat must ask "Does your mother sew? | The cat must ask "Does your mother sew? |
1107 | 01:08:10,879 | 01:08:12,421 | "Get her to stitch that." | "Get her to stitch that." |
1108 | 01:08:12,839 | 01:08:16,049 | -You see what l'm saying? -Yeah cats are hard to train. l know. | -You see what l'm saying? -Yeah cats are hard to train. l know. |
1109 | 01:08:16,926 | 01:08:21,096 | But Clem l mean Mr. Bennedetti... | But Clem l mean Mr. Bennedetti... |
1110 | 01:08:21,306 | 01:08:24,558 | You've convinced me that we are friends in the future. Call me Clem. | You've convinced me that we are friends in the future. Call me Clem. |
1111 | 01:08:24,642 | 01:08:25,851 | Man. | Man. |
1112 | 01:08:26,352 | 01:08:30,022 | l love it. Well Clem you just turned my life around man. You made me rich. | l love it. Well Clem you just turned my life around man. You made me rich. |
1113 | 01:08:30,106 | 01:08:31,106 | Me too! | Me too! |
1114 | 01:08:33,610 | 01:08:36,820 | -Yeah. -This is like a crazy accident l saw you. | -Yeah. -This is like a crazy accident l saw you. |
1115 | 01:08:36,905 | 01:08:39,364 | Because now l'm gonna be able to buy my kids so much stuff. | Because now l'm gonna be able to buy my kids so much stuff. |
1116 | 01:08:39,449 | 01:08:41,074 | l'm gonna be so important to them now. | l'm gonna be so important to them now. |
1117 | 01:08:41,242 | 01:08:45,245 | Joe l think you've not learned all the things you need to know from meʼ | Joe l think you've not learned all the things you need to know from meʼ |
1118 | 01:08:45,997 | 01:08:49,124 | but for now there's something more important that bothers me. | but for now there's something more important that bothers me. |
1119 | 01:08:49,209 | 01:08:50,209 | Concerns me. | Concerns me. |
1120 | 01:08:50,752 | 01:08:52,628 | -This girl you talk about this Brandy? -Yeah. | -This girl you talk about this Brandy? -Yeah. |
1121 | 01:08:52,712 | 01:08:54,671 | Something nags me in the back of my head. | Something nags me in the back of my head. |
1122 | 01:08:55,423 | 01:08:58,008 | What if you miss | What if you miss |
1123 | 01:08:58,718 | 01:08:59,802 | the first time you meet her? | the first time you meet her? |
1124 | 01:09:00,720 | 01:09:01,720 | Everything's gonna be off. | Everything's gonna be off. |
1125 | 01:09:02,472 | 01:09:04,389 | The future's gonna be bat-shit crazy. | The future's gonna be bat-shit crazy. |
1126 | 01:09:07,018 | 01:09:09,853 | That's so true. That's so smart. l didn't think of that. | That's so true. That's so smart. l didn't think of that. |
1127 | 01:09:10,855 | 01:09:13,565 | Clem l need to make it back to where l first met Brandy. | Clem l need to make it back to where l first met Brandy. |
1128 | 01:09:14,067 | 01:09:15,359 | To make everything happen. | To make everything happen. |
1129 | 01:09:15,735 | 01:09:18,904 | That's when her dog's balls got stuck on her porch. | That's when her dog's balls got stuck on her porch. |
1130 | 01:09:19,572 | 01:09:23,992 | He was licking his ballsʼ and it was 40 below zero outside. | He was licking his ballsʼ and it was 40 below zero outside. |
1131 | 01:09:24,244 | 01:09:25,744 | -What do you expect? -Yeah. | -What do you expect? -Yeah. |
1132 | 01:09:26,079 | 01:09:28,497 | Joe let's have one for the road. | Joe let's have one for the road. |
1133 | 01:09:30,375 | 01:09:34,086 | l don't even know if l should have a drink because l got my liver taken out. | l don't even know if l should have a drink because l got my liver taken out. |
1134 | 01:09:34,420 | 01:09:37,464 | -Who gives a shit? Okay. -Yeah. Okay. Let's do it. | -Who gives a shit? Okay. -Yeah. Okay. Let's do it. |
1135 | 01:09:37,632 | 01:09:39,550 | No kidney no problem. | No kidney no problem. |
1136 | 01:09:39,926 | 01:09:41,802 | That's right. Let's do it. | That's right. Let's do it. |
1137 | 01:09:49,769 | 01:09:50,769 | Yeah. | Yeah. |
1138 | 01:09:54,315 | 01:09:55,774 | Daddy where are you? | Daddy where are you? |
1139 | 01:10:00,655 | 01:10:01,655 | Man. | Man. |
1140 | 01:10:02,907 | 01:10:03,907 | You're awake. | You're awake. |
1141 | 01:10:04,200 | 01:10:06,743 | -Not feeling good l bet huh? -No. | -Not feeling good l bet huh? -No. |
1142 | 01:10:06,828 | 01:10:10,873 | l think l was drunk. 'Cause you knowʼ l had some of my innards harvested. | l think l was drunk. 'Cause you knowʼ l had some of my innards harvested. |
1143 | 01:10:11,291 | 01:10:14,293 | Yeah. That would explain the empty spots on the X-ray. | Yeah. That would explain the empty spots on the X-ray. |
1144 | 01:10:14,544 | 01:10:16,295 | But drunk is an understatement. | But drunk is an understatement. |
1145 | 01:10:16,379 | 01:10:19,423 | They found you running naked with a Roman candle sticking out of your ass. | They found you running naked with a Roman candle sticking out of your ass. |
1146 | 01:10:19,966 | 01:10:21,466 | You tried to eat a bunch of pigeonsʼ | You tried to eat a bunch of pigeonsʼ |
1147 | 01:10:21,551 | 01:10:23,927 | then you climbed onstage at a Donnie Osmond concertʼ | then you climbed onstage at a Donnie Osmond concertʼ |
1148 | 01:10:24,053 | 01:10:26,513 | screaming "What did y'all do with Van Halen?" | screaming "What did y'all do with Van Halen?" |
1149 | 01:10:26,639 | 01:10:31,476 | And then this huge guy punched you incredibly hard directly in your testicles. | And then this huge guy punched you incredibly hard directly in your testicles. |
1150 | 01:10:32,854 | 01:10:33,854 | Check this out. | Check this out. |
1151 | 01:10:34,939 | 01:10:35,939 | You're gonna love this. | You're gonna love this. |
1152 | 01:10:39,027 | 01:10:40,027 | That's me! | That's me! |
1153 | 01:10:40,153 | 01:10:44,114 | Your balls are basically like "Hey manʼ let's go see what his throat is talking about!" | Your balls are basically like "Hey manʼ let's go see what his throat is talking about!" |
1154 | 01:10:45,158 | 01:10:47,659 | There was a tour bus that was driving by. There was a bunch of Japaneseʼ | There was a tour bus that was driving by. There was a bunch of Japaneseʼ |
1155 | 01:10:47,744 | 01:10:50,370 | and you know how those people are with their cameras. | and you know how those people are with their cameras. |
1156 | 01:10:51,372 | 01:10:52,581 | My wife is Asian! | My wife is Asian! |
1157 | 01:10:52,665 | 01:10:55,876 | What's up with the jokes? Like what are youʼ like some grand wizard or something? | What's up with the jokes? Like what are youʼ like some grand wizard or something? |
1158 | 01:10:56,377 | 01:10:58,795 | -No man l didn't say nothing. -You nodded. | -No man l didn't say nothing. -You nodded. |
1159 | 01:10:59,005 | 01:11:01,089 | You nodded like a motherfucker. | You nodded like a motherfucker. |
1160 | 01:11:01,174 | 01:11:06,803 | Anyway the punch was so masterful that your testicles are up way inside you | Anyway the punch was so masterful that your testicles are up way inside you |
1161 | 01:11:07,013 | 01:11:09,848 | and they would have gone a lot higher had they not bounced off your heart. | and they would have gone a lot higher had they not bounced off your heart. |
1162 | 01:11:10,099 | 01:11:12,643 | Wait my ball sack's where? | Wait my ball sack's where? |
1163 | 01:11:12,727 | 01:11:13,977 | Your balls are in your stomach | Your balls are in your stomach |
1164 | 01:11:14,062 | 01:11:17,397 | and your sacks are literally being digested as we speak. | and your sacks are literally being digested as we speak. |
1165 | 01:11:18,107 | 01:11:21,985 | And that's not fantastic so what we're gonna have to do is yank them out. | And that's not fantastic so what we're gonna have to do is yank them out. |
1166 | 01:11:22,070 | 01:11:25,155 | -You mean gently extract? -Yes. | -You mean gently extract? -Yes. |
1167 | 01:11:25,531 | 01:11:27,366 | By extract we mean yank. | By extract we mean yank. |
1168 | 01:11:27,533 | 01:11:32,829 | And so we have these things that look like salad tongs. Actually they are salad tongs | And so we have these things that look like salad tongs. Actually they are salad tongs |
1169 | 01:11:32,914 | 01:11:34,539 | from the Sizzler salad bar. | from the Sizzler salad bar. |
1170 | 01:11:34,791 | 01:11:37,668 | You know there's always some good pussy at Sizzler. | You know there's always some good pussy at Sizzler. |
1171 | 01:11:38,127 | 01:11:42,255 | Sizzler yeah. l'm usually buried in cornbread. l don't look up. | Sizzler yeah. l'm usually buried in cornbread. l don't look up. |
1172 | 01:11:42,340 | 01:11:46,593 | l usually say this may hurt a bitʼ but this is definitely gonna hurt. | l usually say this may hurt a bitʼ but this is definitely gonna hurt. |
1173 | 01:11:46,886 | 01:11:49,471 | All right are you ready? Let's breathe. | All right are you ready? Let's breathe. |
1174 | 01:11:49,847 | 01:11:50,847 | Whoa is there a parakeet! | Whoa is there a parakeet! |
1175 | 01:11:51,432 | 01:11:52,432 | ln here? | ln here? |
1176 | 01:11:55,228 | 01:11:58,397 | Damn man why are you yelling? Why did you yell in my ear? | Damn man why are you yelling? Why did you yell in my ear? |
1177 | 01:11:58,731 | 01:12:00,649 | Well it hurt like a mofo! | Well it hurt like a mofo! |
1178 | 01:12:00,900 | 01:12:02,401 | Yeah but what about my ear? | Yeah but what about my ear? |
1179 | 01:12:02,485 | 01:12:05,320 | You could've turned your face that way. You could've screamed at that wall. | You could've turned your face that way. You could've screamed at that wall. |
1180 | 01:12:05,488 | 01:12:08,073 | But you wanted to yell in my... Whoa! | But you wanted to yell in my... Whoa! |
1181 | 01:12:08,366 | 01:12:09,366 | -Whoa what? -Whoa. | -Whoa what? -Whoa. |
1182 | 01:12:09,701 | 01:12:10,701 | Whoa good news? | Whoa good news? |
1183 | 01:12:11,786 | 01:12:15,622 | You can say that l definitely extracted your balls. | You can say that l definitely extracted your balls. |
1184 | 01:12:16,249 | 01:12:18,792 | A lot of credit goes to the workout regimen l've been on. | A lot of credit goes to the workout regimen l've been on. |
1185 | 01:12:20,169 | 01:12:22,379 | They're hanging a little low man. | They're hanging a little low man. |
1186 | 01:12:22,463 | 01:12:23,922 | They do hang but how low? | They do hang but how low? |
1187 | 01:12:24,132 | 01:12:25,132 | Remember Clackers? | Remember Clackers? |
1188 | 01:12:25,925 | 01:12:28,593 | Clackers that's my balls. That's too far. | Clackers that's my balls. That's too far. |
1189 | 01:12:28,678 | 01:12:30,846 | Don't worry balls have a great healing mechanism. | Don't worry balls have a great healing mechanism. |
1190 | 01:12:30,930 | 01:12:31,930 | You'll be back May June. | You'll be back May June. |
1191 | 01:12:32,473 | 01:12:36,810 | Wait May or June? l've got to go to Silvertown by tomorrow! | Wait May or June? l've got to go to Silvertown by tomorrow! |
1192 | 01:12:37,061 | 01:12:39,563 | You shouldn't do that. You shouldn't travel. | You shouldn't do that. You shouldn't travel. |
1193 | 01:12:39,647 | 01:12:42,524 | See your balls look like tube socks with lemons in them. | See your balls look like tube socks with lemons in them. |
1194 | 01:12:42,900 | 01:12:46,236 | And that's usually the side effect from the yankotomy l performed. | And that's usually the side effect from the yankotomy l performed. |
1195 | 01:12:46,612 | 01:12:49,823 | But if l don't go to Silvertownʼ l don't meet Brandyʼ | But if l don't go to Silvertownʼ l don't meet Brandyʼ |
1196 | 01:12:50,033 | 01:12:53,076 | and my whole future is thrown off. Do you understand? l gotta go! | and my whole future is thrown off. Do you understand? l gotta go! |
1197 | 01:12:53,661 | 01:12:54,661 | Okay. | Okay. |
1198 | 01:13:09,510 | 01:13:11,053 | Good evening, folks, | Good evening, folks, |
1199 | 01:13:11,137 | 01:13:15,223 | we'll be starting our descent into Spokane, Washington, in a few minutes. | we'll be starting our descent into Spokane, Washington, in a few minutes. |
1200 | 01:13:15,308 | 01:13:20,645 | So, if anyone needs to use the restroom, please do so now. | So, if anyone needs to use the restroom, please do so now. |
1201 | 01:13:21,439 | 01:13:24,399 | Good idea. l'm gonna take a pee real quick. | Good idea. l'm gonna take a pee real quick. |
1202 | 01:13:27,945 | 01:13:29,321 | Turbulence everybody. | Turbulence everybody. |
1203 | 01:13:29,906 | 01:13:31,406 | Give me a second. | Give me a second. |
1204 | 01:13:34,285 | 01:13:35,285 | Are those your balls? | Are those your balls? |
1205 | 01:13:35,745 | 01:13:38,038 | Yeah. ls that an apple? | Yeah. ls that an apple? |
1206 | 01:13:41,209 | 01:13:42,209 | Turbulentay. | Turbulentay. |
1207 | 01:13:50,176 | 01:13:54,304 | Dang too much turb. Gotta sit down and pee like a little girl. | Dang too much turb. Gotta sit down and pee like a little girl. |
1208 | 01:13:57,683 | 01:13:58,809 | My nuts! | My nuts! |
1209 | 01:13:59,685 | 01:14:00,977 | My balls! | My balls! |
1210 | 01:14:03,356 | 01:14:06,066 | -Sir are you okay in there? -No look! | -Sir are you okay in there? -No look! |
1211 | 01:14:06,359 | 01:14:09,361 | -My nuts got sucked in look! -Oh my God! | -My nuts got sucked in look! -Oh my God! |
1212 | 01:14:09,529 | 01:14:14,241 | -What'd you do that for? That's so stupid. -l'm not on trial here. l did an accident. | -What'd you do that for? That's so stupid. -l'm not on trial here. l did an accident. |
1213 | 01:14:14,700 | 01:14:15,700 | What's going on? | What's going on? |
1214 | 01:14:15,993 | 01:14:17,869 | -Oh good sweet Lord God. -l need help. | -Oh good sweet Lord God. -l need help. |
1215 | 01:14:18,037 | 01:14:20,330 | This man has gotten his ball sack stuck down the toilet. | This man has gotten his ball sack stuck down the toilet. |
1216 | 01:14:20,414 | 01:14:22,749 | l just got sucked. lt's an accident. l pushed the thing. | l just got sucked. lt's an accident. l pushed the thing. |
1217 | 01:14:22,834 | 01:14:26,878 | -l'm sorry. l quit. l hate balls to start off with. -No no no. | -l'm sorry. l quit. l hate balls to start off with. -No no no. |
1218 | 01:14:27,046 | 01:14:28,338 | -No l'm... -Don't quit l need help! | -No l'm... -Don't quit l need help! |
1219 | 01:14:28,422 | 01:14:30,132 | You are helping me out with this. l don't know what to do. | You are helping me out with this. l don't know what to do. |
1220 | 01:14:30,216 | 01:14:32,050 | They didn't deal with this in stewardess school. | They didn't deal with this in stewardess school. |
1221 | 01:14:32,135 | 01:14:34,177 | Sir you've got to lift them up when l flush. Okay? | Sir you've got to lift them up when l flush. Okay? |
1222 | 01:14:34,262 | 01:14:35,303 | That doesn't sound like it's gonna work. | That doesn't sound like it's gonna work. |
1223 | 01:14:35,429 | 01:14:36,429 | -One two three. -No no no! | -One two three. -No no no! |
1224 | 01:14:38,891 | 01:14:40,559 | lt didn't work! lt didn't work. | lt didn't work! lt didn't work. |
1225 | 01:14:40,643 | 01:14:43,061 | Well we're gonna try it again. l'm gonna try it again. One two three. | Well we're gonna try it again. l'm gonna try it again. One two three. |
1226 | 01:14:43,146 | 01:14:44,146 | No no no! | No no no! |
1227 | 01:14:44,564 | 01:14:45,564 | You bitch! | You bitch! |
1228 | 01:14:46,065 | 01:14:49,693 | What're you doing? l'm sorry. Don't do it! l never say the "B" word. | What're you doing? l'm sorry. Don't do it! l never say the "B" word. |
1229 | 01:14:50,027 | 01:14:53,905 | But it hurts too much. You can't do that. We need to think of a new strategy. | But it hurts too much. You can't do that. We need to think of a new strategy. |
1230 | 01:14:54,490 | 01:14:56,867 | -What is going on out here ladies? -Have a look. | -What is going on out here ladies? -Have a look. |
1231 | 01:14:57,243 | 01:15:01,538 | -What is... What the... Whoa! Whoa! -Yeah. | -What is... What the... Whoa! Whoa! -Yeah. |
1232 | 01:15:04,709 | 01:15:08,086 | l'm gonna get you guys some help. Let's clean that up. | l'm gonna get you guys some help. Let's clean that up. |
1233 | 01:15:09,005 | 01:15:11,840 | You want me to clean this up first or get the guy's balls out of the toilet? | You want me to clean this up first or get the guy's balls out of the toilet? |
1234 | 01:15:11,924 | 01:15:14,926 | -Watch your face sir. lt's coming in! -Get out of here with your foot! | -Watch your face sir. lt's coming in! -Get out of here with your foot! |
1235 | 01:15:15,011 | 01:15:17,721 | l'm gonna get you back to your seatʼ you gotta get your nuts up out of that... | l'm gonna get you back to your seatʼ you gotta get your nuts up out of that... |
1236 | 01:15:17,805 | 01:15:19,097 | Don't kick me Jackie Chan! | Don't kick me Jackie Chan! |
1237 | 01:15:26,814 | 01:15:29,608 | -l passed out for a minute. -Right. | -l passed out for a minute. -Right. |
1238 | 01:15:29,859 | 01:15:31,735 | Not again you bitch! | Not again you bitch! |
1239 | 01:15:36,532 | 01:15:40,035 | Do you really have to parade me across the tarmac? | Do you really have to parade me across the tarmac? |
1240 | 01:15:40,286 | 01:15:41,953 | ls there not a shortcut? | ls there not a shortcut? |
1241 | 01:15:42,288 | 01:15:44,164 | l'm out here on display. | l'm out here on display. |
1242 | 01:15:44,874 | 01:15:45,874 | Hey gals. | Hey gals. |
1243 | 01:15:46,959 | 01:15:48,501 | l'm usually in a Hemi. | l'm usually in a Hemi. |
1244 | 01:15:48,920 | 01:15:51,796 | Man. ls there a second gear on this? | Man. ls there a second gear on this? |
1245 | 01:15:52,340 | 01:15:53,882 | You see what that is right? You see it? | You see what that is right? You see it? |
1246 | 01:15:54,133 | 01:15:57,844 | -This is crazy. -His left nut is right in that one gear. | -This is crazy. -His left nut is right in that one gear. |
1247 | 01:15:58,221 | 01:16:01,264 | Right there in the gear box. And his other one his other nut... | Right there in the gear box. And his other one his other nut... |
1248 | 01:16:01,390 | 01:16:03,475 | -Where'd you take off from? Miami? -Miami. | -Where'd you take off from? Miami? -Miami. |
1249 | 01:16:03,768 | 01:16:05,518 | -His other nut's probably back in Miami. -Where? | -His other nut's probably back in Miami. -Where? |
1250 | 01:16:05,603 | 01:16:07,812 | -They might have to ship it to you buddy. -Are you funning me? | -They might have to ship it to you buddy. -Are you funning me? |
1251 | 01:16:07,897 | 01:16:11,191 | Just hand me pliers andʼ what do you think about a saw? | Just hand me pliers andʼ what do you think about a saw? |
1252 | 01:16:11,275 | 01:16:13,401 | A saw? Wait like a hacksaw? | A saw? Wait like a hacksaw? |
1253 | 01:16:13,486 | 01:16:17,072 | Like to hack it off? No no. No saw by my balls. Thanks. | Like to hack it off? No no. No saw by my balls. Thanks. |
1254 | 01:16:17,156 | 01:16:20,075 | -Hey buddy can you let us concentrate? -How long's this gonna take? | -Hey buddy can you let us concentrate? -How long's this gonna take? |
1255 | 01:16:20,159 | 01:16:22,118 | Like four or five hours. Whatever it doesn't matter. | Like four or five hours. Whatever it doesn't matter. |
1256 | 01:16:22,203 | 01:16:25,205 | Four or five hours? No way man. l gotta take an airplane to ldaho. | Four or five hours? No way man. l gotta take an airplane to ldaho. |
1257 | 01:16:25,331 | 01:16:27,832 | l gotta be honest manʼ planes are out of the question. | l gotta be honest manʼ planes are out of the question. |
1258 | 01:16:28,042 | 01:16:31,044 | -You're gonna have to drive. -Drive? l can't drive with these balls. | -You're gonna have to drive. -Drive? l can't drive with these balls. |
1259 | 01:16:31,295 | 01:16:34,256 | Plus l drive Moparʼ not some crummy rental car. | Plus l drive Moparʼ not some crummy rental car. |
1260 | 01:16:35,967 | 01:16:36,967 | So I rented a car. | So I rented a car. |
1261 | 01:16:37,510 | 01:16:41,263 | And now l was heading home, but of course l ran out of gas. Typical. | And now l was heading home, but of course l ran out of gas. Typical. |
1262 | 01:16:41,514 | 01:16:42,555 | Everyone saw that coming. | Everyone saw that coming. |
1263 | 01:16:43,391 | 01:16:44,557 | And then l hopped a train, | And then l hopped a train, |
1264 | 01:16:44,642 | 01:16:47,018 | and that was fun, 'cause the guy even let me drive it for a second. | and that was fun, 'cause the guy even let me drive it for a second. |
1265 | 01:16:50,022 | 01:16:51,356 | Well, l screwed that up fast. | Well, l screwed that up fast. |
1266 | 01:16:52,358 | 01:16:55,235 | l didn't stick around to fill out no paperwork, l just started running. | l didn't stick around to fill out no paperwork, l just started running. |
1267 | 01:16:55,528 | 01:16:57,028 | l'm actually a good runner. | l'm actually a good runner. |
1268 | 01:16:57,488 | 01:16:58,488 | l'm actually not. | l'm actually not. |
1269 | 01:17:06,539 | 01:17:07,539 | Man. | Man. |
1270 | 01:17:16,799 | 01:17:19,217 | lf it isn't dirty Joe Dirt. | lf it isn't dirty Joe Dirt. |
1271 | 01:17:19,510 | 01:17:22,220 | Man. Hey Foggle. | Man. Hey Foggle. |
1272 | 01:17:22,430 | 01:17:24,306 | Phonebook's looking a little thinner these days. | Phonebook's looking a little thinner these days. |
1273 | 01:17:24,724 | 01:17:26,141 | How 'bout you give us them boots. | How 'bout you give us them boots. |
1274 | 01:17:26,225 | 01:17:29,436 | And we'll kill you only half as slow as we was gonna. | And we'll kill you only half as slow as we was gonna. |
1275 | 01:17:30,187 | 01:17:31,396 | How did you find me man? | How did you find me man? |
1276 | 01:17:31,731 | 01:17:34,107 | l met you back in 1 965. | l met you back in 1 965. |
1277 | 01:17:34,275 | 01:17:36,985 | Joe Dirt we're the dream you can't slip. | Joe Dirt we're the dream you can't slip. |
1278 | 01:17:37,069 | 01:17:40,822 | The ache in your heart. The darkness just outside of your light. | The ache in your heart. The darkness just outside of your light. |
1279 | 01:17:41,240 | 01:17:44,951 | We've been hounding you since the day you was left behind like garbage | We've been hounding you since the day you was left behind like garbage |
1280 | 01:17:45,036 | 01:17:46,494 | by your ma and pa. | by your ma and pa. |
1281 | 01:17:47,413 | 01:17:51,916 | We're an allegory and a realityʼ and your time is up. | We're an allegory and a realityʼ and your time is up. |
1282 | 01:17:52,585 | 01:17:54,210 | This is gonna be good. | This is gonna be good. |
1283 | 01:17:54,420 | 01:17:55,420 | Hey. | Hey. |
1284 | 01:18:00,801 | 01:18:02,552 | l don't like your tone. | l don't like your tone. |
1285 | 01:18:03,220 | 01:18:05,180 | You're talking to my boy all wrong. | You're talking to my boy all wrong. |
1286 | 01:18:05,598 | 01:18:06,598 | Clem! | Clem! |
1287 | 01:18:10,853 | 01:18:11,853 | Who are you? | Who are you? |
1288 | 01:18:12,104 | 01:18:16,566 | l've come to check on my boy Joe Dirt. He's my goose that lays the golden eggs. | l've come to check on my boy Joe Dirt. He's my goose that lays the golden eggs. |
1289 | 01:18:16,692 | 01:18:19,778 | You don't mess with my gooseʼ unless you're a gander. | You don't mess with my gooseʼ unless you're a gander. |
1290 | 01:18:20,780 | 01:18:22,822 | -Tell me are you a gander? -No! | -Tell me are you a gander? -No! |
1291 | 01:18:23,157 | 01:18:24,657 | No l'm not a gander! | No l'm not a gander! |
1292 | 01:18:25,201 | 01:18:27,285 | Clem l'm so glad to see you man. But l gotta get out of here. | Clem l'm so glad to see you man. But l gotta get out of here. |
1293 | 01:18:27,370 | 01:18:28,912 | l've got to get to Brandy's house right now! | l've got to get to Brandy's house right now! |
1294 | 01:18:29,080 | 01:18:30,955 | l want those boots pissant! | l want those boots pissant! |
1295 | 01:18:31,123 | 01:18:32,957 | Joe go meet your woman. | Joe go meet your woman. |
1296 | 01:18:33,459 | 01:18:35,585 | l will take care of these dunskies. | l will take care of these dunskies. |
1297 | 01:18:35,795 | 01:18:38,004 | You know we're kind of running the show here. | You know we're kind of running the show here. |
1298 | 01:18:38,089 | 01:18:41,800 | We've got our chains and knives. | We've got our chains and knives. |
1299 | 01:18:41,884 | 01:18:43,510 | Don't bring a knife to a gunfight. | Don't bring a knife to a gunfight. |
1300 | 01:18:44,303 | 01:18:46,054 | Especially if l've got the guns. | Especially if l've got the guns. |
1301 | 01:18:46,472 | 01:18:47,472 | Not now darling. | Not now darling. |
1302 | 01:18:48,307 | 01:18:50,225 | Hey Clemʼ you don't have to do this for me buddy. | Hey Clemʼ you don't have to do this for me buddy. |
1303 | 01:18:51,102 | 01:18:54,145 | Joe Dirt we may meet again someday. | Joe Dirt we may meet again someday. |
1304 | 01:18:54,230 | 01:18:55,230 | l don't know. | l don't know. |
1305 | 01:18:55,314 | 01:18:58,191 | But for that to happenʼ you must meet your destiny. | But for that to happenʼ you must meet your destiny. |
1306 | 01:18:59,151 | 01:19:02,070 | You've learned how hot it is when you lose your shade tree. | You've learned how hot it is when you lose your shade tree. |
1307 | 01:19:02,905 | 01:19:04,489 | Go get your shade tree back. | Go get your shade tree back. |
1308 | 01:19:04,824 | 01:19:05,907 | Thanks man. | Thanks man. |
1309 | 01:19:06,367 | 01:19:09,160 | Hey by the way why doesn't it sound fruity when you say that? | Hey by the way why doesn't it sound fruity when you say that? |
1310 | 01:19:09,495 | 01:19:11,496 | You don't have time for the explanation. | You don't have time for the explanation. |
1311 | 01:19:11,580 | 01:19:15,333 | -l don't. Bye Foggle. l gotta go. -Joe Dirt. | -l don't. Bye Foggle. l gotta go. -Joe Dirt. |
1312 | 01:19:16,502 | 01:19:17,502 | Joe Dirt! | Joe Dirt! |
1313 | 01:19:20,214 | 01:19:21,214 | And you. | And you. |
1314 | 01:19:22,133 | 01:19:25,176 | You're done with Joe Dirt. You must never haunt his dreams again. | You're done with Joe Dirt. You must never haunt his dreams again. |
1315 | 01:19:25,344 | 01:19:28,888 | You must never be that voice of doubt that makes him think he's not good. | You must never be that voice of doubt that makes him think he's not good. |
1316 | 01:19:29,682 | 01:19:31,724 | Your dance with Joe Dirt is done. | Your dance with Joe Dirt is done. |
1317 | 01:19:35,980 | 01:19:37,230 | l'll let you know when it's over. | l'll let you know when it's over. |
1318 | 01:19:37,565 | 01:19:40,692 | Hey does your mother sew? | Hey does your mother sew? |
1319 | 01:19:56,333 | 01:19:58,543 | Get her to stitch that! | Get her to stitch that! |
1320 | 01:20:09,513 | 01:20:10,513 | Charlie! | Charlie! |
1321 | 01:20:13,309 | 01:20:15,185 | We've got to get you unstuck. | We've got to get you unstuck. |
1322 | 01:20:17,980 | 01:20:20,023 | ls there anybody out there that will help me? | ls there anybody out there that will help me? |
1323 | 01:20:22,401 | 01:20:23,401 | lt's you! | lt's you! |
1324 | 01:20:24,570 | 01:20:25,570 | Yeah. | Yeah. |
1325 | 01:20:25,654 | 01:20:27,864 | Thank goodness. We've gotta help Charlie. | Thank goodness. We've gotta help Charlie. |
1326 | 01:20:27,948 | 01:20:30,241 | l was born to help Charlie. What's going on? | l was born to help Charlie. What's going on? |
1327 | 01:20:30,367 | 01:20:33,328 | l was thinking maybe warm water and a spatula? | l was thinking maybe warm water and a spatula? |
1328 | 01:20:33,412 | 01:20:34,787 | -That's a great idea. -Okay. | -That's a great idea. -Okay. |
1329 | 01:20:36,457 | 01:20:38,333 | Man keep your mouth shut mutt. | Man keep your mouth shut mutt. |
1330 | 01:20:40,002 | 01:20:42,587 | All right. l'm looking at you too. He's all good. Come on back. | All right. l'm looking at you too. He's all good. Come on back. |
1331 | 01:20:44,423 | 01:20:45,423 | Charlie! | Charlie! |
1332 | 01:20:46,967 | 01:20:48,760 | -Jimmy thank you! -You're welcome. | -Jimmy thank you! -You're welcome. |
1333 | 01:20:49,053 | 01:20:51,054 | -lt ain't nothing. -How did you do that? | -lt ain't nothing. -How did you do that? |
1334 | 01:20:51,138 | 01:20:53,932 | Don't worry about it. That's a guy thing right there. | Don't worry about it. That's a guy thing right there. |
1335 | 01:20:56,060 | 01:20:57,852 | Brandy hey. | Brandy hey. |
1336 | 01:20:59,605 | 01:21:01,814 | l'm sorry do l know you? | l'm sorry do l know you? |
1337 | 01:21:02,441 | 01:21:03,441 | lt's me Brandy Joe Dirt. | lt's me Brandy Joe Dirt. |
1338 | 01:21:03,901 | 01:21:04,901 | Joe Dirt? | Joe Dirt? |
1339 | 01:21:05,194 | 01:21:06,277 | What kind of name is that? | What kind of name is that? |
1340 | 01:21:06,737 | 01:21:11,032 | lt's me. We're supposed to meet hereʼ right now. Right exactly now with Charlie. | lt's me. We're supposed to meet hereʼ right now. Right exactly now with Charlie. |
1341 | 01:21:11,700 | 01:21:15,078 | We become friendsʼ and eventually we get married. | We become friendsʼ and eventually we get married. |
1342 | 01:21:15,204 | 01:21:16,955 | Boy what are you talking about? | Boy what are you talking about? |
1343 | 01:21:17,289 | 01:21:18,581 | ls you wasted or something? | ls you wasted or something? |
1344 | 01:21:19,041 | 01:21:21,543 | Mr. Dirt l can't talk right now. | Mr. Dirt l can't talk right now. |
1345 | 01:21:22,086 | 01:21:25,255 | -Jimmy and l need to tend to my dog. -Brandy l'm rich now. | -Jimmy and l need to tend to my dog. -Brandy l'm rich now. |
1346 | 01:21:25,965 | 01:21:27,215 | l'm super rich. | l'm super rich. |
1347 | 01:21:28,133 | 01:21:29,467 | l'm somebody that's worth loving. | l'm somebody that's worth loving. |
1348 | 01:21:30,678 | 01:21:34,305 | Mr. Dirt money doesn't interest me all that much. | Mr. Dirt money doesn't interest me all that much. |
1349 | 01:21:35,140 | 01:21:38,017 | l'm more interested in a man that is kind. | l'm more interested in a man that is kind. |
1350 | 01:21:38,435 | 01:21:41,980 | like somebody that would help a dog in distress. | like somebody that would help a dog in distress. |
1351 | 01:21:42,565 | 01:21:47,068 | Well hell just yesterday l saved 1 5 raccoons by giving them mouth-to-mouth | Well hell just yesterday l saved 1 5 raccoons by giving them mouth-to-mouth |
1352 | 01:21:47,152 | 01:21:49,195 | 'cause they was choking on garbage and stuff. | 'cause they was choking on garbage and stuff. |
1353 | 01:21:49,488 | 01:21:50,822 | Heck l'll save anybody. | Heck l'll save anybody. |
1354 | 01:21:51,949 | 01:21:53,366 | Especially you Brandy. | Especially you Brandy. |
1355 | 01:21:53,617 | 01:21:55,952 | You know 'cause l am armed! | You know 'cause l am armed! |
1356 | 01:21:56,245 | 01:21:58,246 | A-R-M-D right there. | A-R-M-D right there. |
1357 | 01:21:59,331 | 01:22:00,331 | Wellʼ | Wellʼ |
1358 | 01:22:00,583 | 01:22:02,083 | it was nice meeting you Mr. Dirt. | it was nice meeting you Mr. Dirt. |
1359 | 01:22:02,626 | 01:22:03,626 | Yeah later Dirt. | Yeah later Dirt. |
1360 | 01:22:05,838 | 01:22:11,676 | -Jimmy would you like some ice cream? -Why hells to the yes. Get on in there! | -Jimmy would you like some ice cream? -Why hells to the yes. Get on in there! |
1361 | 01:22:31,196 | 01:22:32,196 | And that was it. | And that was it. |
1362 | 01:22:34,033 | 01:22:35,033 | l missed my destiny. | l missed my destiny. |
1363 | 01:22:35,951 | 01:22:37,118 | Just like that it was all gone. | Just like that it was all gone. |
1364 | 01:22:37,870 | 01:22:40,872 | l'm sorry Joe. l really am. | l'm sorry Joe. l really am. |
1365 | 01:22:41,040 | 01:22:42,957 | Thanks for listening. l appreciate it. | Thanks for listening. l appreciate it. |
1366 | 01:22:43,042 | 01:22:45,585 | Right now you're probably the only friend l have. | Right now you're probably the only friend l have. |
1367 | 01:22:47,338 | 01:22:48,796 | There's my bus! | There's my bus! |
1368 | 01:22:49,840 | 01:22:50,840 | See ya! | See ya! |
1369 | 01:22:57,890 | 01:23:00,183 | Wow where's the fire lady? | Wow where's the fire lady? |
1370 | 01:23:03,020 | 01:23:05,063 | He got kicked to the curb! | He got kicked to the curb! |
1371 | 01:23:05,189 | 01:23:07,523 | Joe Dirt fucked up a couple things. | Joe Dirt fucked up a couple things. |
1372 | 01:23:09,068 | 01:23:11,319 | Damn she just left him. | Damn she just left him. |
1373 | 01:23:11,695 | 01:23:14,822 | That boy was left with nothing. | That boy was left with nothing. |
1374 | 01:23:15,699 | 01:23:19,577 | But you know last time all he had was his freedom. | But you know last time all he had was his freedom. |
1375 | 01:23:19,828 | 01:23:20,828 | And you know what freedom is. | And you know what freedom is. |
1376 | 01:23:21,038 | 01:23:22,038 | Yeah. | Yeah. |
1377 | 01:23:22,122 | 01:23:26,250 | Just another word for nothing left to lose. | Just another word for nothing left to lose. |
1378 | 01:23:28,712 | 01:23:32,590 | Look at you all growed up and being Starsky and Putz! | Look at you all growed up and being Starsky and Putz! |
1379 | 01:23:33,759 | 01:23:35,426 | l had a cousin named Randy. | l had a cousin named Randy. |
1380 | 01:23:40,599 | 01:23:41,599 | Yeah. | Yeah. |
1381 | 01:23:42,935 | 01:23:46,896 | But much like Ned Beatty braced against the shale wall in DeIiverance, | But much like Ned Beatty braced against the shale wall in DeIiverance, |
1382 | 01:23:47,272 | 01:23:49,982 | this time he's got shit tons to lose. | this time he's got shit tons to lose. |
1383 | 01:23:50,776 | 01:23:55,697 | But come on it's Joe Dirt. There's always one more ace up his wife-beater. | But come on it's Joe Dirt. There's always one more ace up his wife-beater. |
1384 | 01:23:55,781 | 01:23:57,073 | Let's pick this story back up. | Let's pick this story back up. |
1385 | 01:23:58,742 | 01:24:00,118 | Get out of the road! | Get out of the road! |
1386 | 01:24:07,251 | 01:24:08,251 | What's up? | What's up? |
1387 | 01:24:09,253 | 01:24:12,630 | Hey dude. Where'd you come from? You scared the crap out of me. | Hey dude. Where'd you come from? You scared the crap out of me. |
1388 | 01:24:13,799 | 01:24:16,259 | Looks like you've just completely given up huh Joe? | Looks like you've just completely given up huh Joe? |
1389 | 01:24:16,468 | 01:24:19,595 | Look out... Man that carjust drove through you! | Look out... Man that carjust drove through you! |
1390 | 01:24:19,805 | 01:24:23,725 | Like a car driving through you. Are you some sort of ghost or something? | Like a car driving through you. Are you some sort of ghost or something? |
1391 | 01:24:24,518 | 01:24:28,104 | Ghost-like. Yeah check this out. Put your hand right here. Just touch it. | Ghost-like. Yeah check this out. Put your hand right here. Just touch it. |
1392 | 01:24:28,480 | 01:24:31,190 | No that's your private parts man. | No that's your private parts man. |
1393 | 01:24:31,567 | 01:24:33,651 | Private but you're invited. Go ahead. Put it right there. | Private but you're invited. Go ahead. Put it right there. |
1394 | 01:24:33,736 | 01:24:36,529 | lt'll go right through me. l won't even feel it. l won't even feel it. Go ahead. | lt'll go right through me. l won't even feel it. l won't even feel it. Go ahead. |
1395 | 01:24:36,613 | 01:24:39,323 | -Really? All right l ain't being fruity. -Yeah. All right. | -Really? All right l ain't being fruity. -Yeah. All right. |
1396 | 01:24:39,742 | 01:24:40,950 | lt did! | lt did! |
1397 | 01:24:42,828 | 01:24:46,664 | -That felt nice. -No man don't say that. That's wrong. | -That felt nice. -No man don't say that. That's wrong. |
1398 | 01:24:46,749 | 01:24:49,375 | You could've bought me dinner first. We just met. | You could've bought me dinner first. We just met. |
1399 | 01:24:50,085 | 01:24:51,961 | You talk slow but you move fast. | You talk slow but you move fast. |
1400 | 01:24:52,045 | 01:24:54,881 | Yeah it's like there's a dog whistle in my pants and only you can hear it. | Yeah it's like there's a dog whistle in my pants and only you can hear it. |
1401 | 01:24:55,090 | 01:24:57,300 | Do it again one more time l wanna see if you can get me off again. | Do it again one more time l wanna see if you can get me off again. |
1402 | 01:24:57,384 | 01:25:00,011 | No l didn't get you off manʼ l ain't no party boy. | No l didn't get you off manʼ l ain't no party boy. |
1403 | 01:25:00,929 | 01:25:03,431 | Come on Joe. l'm just messing with you. l was trying to lighten the mood. | Come on Joe. l'm just messing with you. l was trying to lighten the mood. |
1404 | 01:25:03,515 | 01:25:05,767 | l never figured you for a quitter. | l never figured you for a quitter. |
1405 | 01:25:05,851 | 01:25:09,353 | Weren't you the guy who once saidʼ "Life's a garden dig it?" | Weren't you the guy who once saidʼ "Life's a garden dig it?" |
1406 | 01:25:10,230 | 01:25:14,567 | Yeah l also said "Say it don't spray it." But that Joe's gone man. | Yeah l also said "Say it don't spray it." But that Joe's gone man. |
1407 | 01:25:14,818 | 01:25:17,403 | "Life's a garden dig itʼ" ain't nothing but a bumper sticker. | "Life's a garden dig itʼ" ain't nothing but a bumper sticker. |
1408 | 01:25:17,738 | 01:25:21,032 | Well don't you think that sometimes bumper stickers have a little bit of truth in them? | Well don't you think that sometimes bumper stickers have a little bit of truth in them? |
1409 | 01:25:21,241 | 01:25:26,078 | Yeah you know the one that says "Wrap it in latex or she'll get your paychecks." | Yeah you know the one that says "Wrap it in latex or she'll get your paychecks." |
1410 | 01:25:26,371 | 01:25:28,372 | -That one's got lots of truth. Yeah. -Sure. | -That one's got lots of truth. Yeah. -Sure. |
1411 | 01:25:28,499 | 01:25:32,210 | Sure and then l remember that one that said "Coexist." | Sure and then l remember that one that said "Coexist." |
1412 | 01:25:33,545 | 01:25:35,046 | Yeah that's not as funny. | Yeah that's not as funny. |
1413 | 01:25:35,506 | 01:25:39,300 | And then they took the coexist and they changed it to "Joe-exist" | And then they took the coexist and they changed it to "Joe-exist" |
1414 | 01:25:39,760 | 01:25:41,511 | to put his hands on dick. | to put his hands on dick. |
1415 | 01:25:41,595 | 01:25:43,971 | Come on Joe. l want you to come with me. l want to show you something. | Come on Joe. l want you to come with me. l want to show you something. |
1416 | 01:25:44,056 | 01:25:45,181 | l wanna take you to Silvertown. | l wanna take you to Silvertown. |
1417 | 01:25:45,557 | 01:25:50,228 | Silvertown? No way man. That place is 1 ʼ000 miles away. Literally and finger... | Silvertown? No way man. That place is 1 ʼ000 miles away. Literally and finger... |
1418 | 01:25:50,979 | 01:25:51,979 | And fig... | And fig... |
1419 | 01:25:52,564 | 01:25:54,398 | Fig Newtonally. | Fig Newtonally. |
1420 | 01:25:54,942 | 01:25:56,442 | Were you going for "Figuratively"? | Were you going for "Figuratively"? |
1421 | 01:25:56,527 | 01:25:57,652 | 'Cause l know that you were just going for some | 'Cause l know that you were just going for some |
1422 | 01:25:57,736 | 01:25:59,737 | homo action in my pants just a minute ago. | homo action in my pants just a minute ago. |
1423 | 01:26:00,155 | 01:26:02,365 | Joe when you're with me Silvertown is just a second away. | Joe when you're with me Silvertown is just a second away. |
1424 | 01:26:04,284 | 01:26:05,284 | All right. | All right. |
1425 | 01:26:10,791 | 01:26:13,042 | Wait a second is this Silvertown? | Wait a second is this Silvertown? |
1426 | 01:26:13,919 | 01:26:16,003 | Man it's all gone to hell. What happened? | Man it's all gone to hell. What happened? |
1427 | 01:26:16,421 | 01:26:19,340 | You didn't happen Joe. lt all went to hell. | You didn't happen Joe. lt all went to hell. |
1428 | 01:26:19,758 | 01:26:25,096 | Although my guess is you would have rather had it go to the Thunder Down Under. | Although my guess is you would have rather had it go to the Thunder Down Under. |
1429 | 01:26:25,931 | 01:26:28,724 | The Thunder Down Under show? That's a bunch of dudes dancing around. | The Thunder Down Under show? That's a bunch of dudes dancing around. |
1430 | 01:26:28,809 | 01:26:31,018 | Why do you keep saying crap like that? | Why do you keep saying crap like that? |
1431 | 01:26:31,311 | 01:26:33,104 | You couldn't wait to get your hand on my dick. | You couldn't wait to get your hand on my dick. |
1432 | 01:26:33,397 | 01:26:35,940 | And l get it you know we all want what we can't have. | And l get it you know we all want what we can't have. |
1433 | 01:26:36,441 | 01:26:38,818 | You want to touch what's on the other side of the lightʼ | You want to touch what's on the other side of the lightʼ |
1434 | 01:26:38,902 | 01:26:41,028 | and the closest thing to you was my dick. | and the closest thing to you was my dick. |
1435 | 01:26:41,113 | 01:26:43,155 | But you wanted to wear it like a fucking wristwatchʼ | But you wanted to wear it like a fucking wristwatchʼ |
1436 | 01:26:43,240 | 01:26:45,366 | which would be great right? Then you could sayʼ | which would be great right? Then you could sayʼ |
1437 | 01:26:45,909 | 01:26:48,953 | "What time is it? lt's 1 5 minutes to dick." | "What time is it? lt's 1 5 minutes to dick." |
1438 | 01:26:49,538 | 01:26:51,747 | Snapper 1 1 o'clock. | Snapper 1 1 o'clock. |
1439 | 01:26:52,207 | 01:26:53,207 | Nine o'clock. | Nine o'clock. |
1440 | 01:26:53,709 | 01:26:54,709 | Snapper. | Snapper. |
1441 | 01:26:56,295 | 01:26:59,547 | l'd drink a gallon of her piss just to see where it came from. | l'd drink a gallon of her piss just to see where it came from. |
1442 | 01:27:00,799 | 01:27:02,466 | That's nice. Yeah yeah. | That's nice. Yeah yeah. |
1443 | 01:27:02,968 | 01:27:05,011 | l've got Brandy she's my girl and l don't... | l've got Brandy she's my girl and l don't... |
1444 | 01:27:05,095 | 01:27:07,263 | But l guess what they say you knowʼ | But l guess what they say you knowʼ |
1445 | 01:27:07,347 | 01:27:09,932 | "You're on a diet don't mean you can't look at the menu." | "You're on a diet don't mean you can't look at the menu." |
1446 | 01:27:10,726 | 01:27:11,726 | Right? | Right? |
1447 | 01:27:11,810 | 01:27:14,312 | Just because you're petting the dog don't mean you can't have sex with it. | Just because you're petting the dog don't mean you can't have sex with it. |
1448 | 01:27:14,396 | 01:27:15,897 | -Right? -l don't know. | -Right? -l don't know. |
1449 | 01:27:15,981 | 01:27:19,692 | You're creeping me out. You're so creepy. You're so creepy. | You're creeping me out. You're so creepy. You're so creepy. |
1450 | 01:27:19,902 | 01:27:21,611 | My dick had you at hello and now you're | My dick had you at hello and now you're |
1451 | 01:27:21,695 | 01:27:23,779 | talking about having sex with animals and shit. | talking about having sex with animals and shit. |
1452 | 01:27:23,864 | 01:27:25,072 | l don't get you. | l don't get you. |
1453 | 01:27:25,157 | 01:27:27,867 | No dude. Okay you're twisting things around. | No dude. Okay you're twisting things around. |
1454 | 01:27:27,951 | 01:27:30,077 | l just said Silvertown looks way differentʼ | l just said Silvertown looks way differentʼ |
1455 | 01:27:30,287 | 01:27:33,789 | but l didn't say sex with animalsʼ that don't turn me on man that's... | but l didn't say sex with animalsʼ that don't turn me on man that's... |
1456 | 01:27:34,541 | 01:27:36,167 | That's weird stuff l mean... | That's weird stuff l mean... |
1457 | 01:27:37,085 | 01:27:38,419 | Maybe Jessica Rabbit... | Maybe Jessica Rabbit... |
1458 | 01:27:40,923 | 01:27:44,091 | lt's not called Silvertown anymore. Jimmy Yauch bought this jointʼ | lt's not called Silvertown anymore. Jimmy Yauch bought this jointʼ |
1459 | 01:27:44,176 | 01:27:46,093 | changed its name to Jimmy Town. | changed its name to Jimmy Town. |
1460 | 01:27:46,178 | 01:27:47,595 | What... | What... |
1461 | 01:27:47,679 | 01:27:49,847 | What? Dude why would he do that? | What? Dude why would he do that? |
1462 | 01:27:50,515 | 01:27:52,975 | Well he got rich Joe. He got rich as hell. | Well he got rich Joe. He got rich as hell. |
1463 | 01:27:53,060 | 01:27:57,939 | But all he does anymore is sit around and pop Molly cut with ketamine and shit. | But all he does anymore is sit around and pop Molly cut with ketamine and shit. |
1464 | 01:27:58,023 | 01:27:59,273 | Trip his balls off. | Trip his balls off. |
1465 | 01:27:59,358 | 01:28:02,151 | Joe about what happened back thereʼ you know when you fisted me? | Joe about what happened back thereʼ you know when you fisted me? |
1466 | 01:28:02,235 | 01:28:04,362 | l don't want things to get weird between the two of us. | l don't want things to get weird between the two of us. |
1467 | 01:28:04,571 | 01:28:07,531 | But if l could just be serious for a second "What do balls taste like?" | But if l could just be serious for a second "What do balls taste like?" |
1468 | 01:28:08,325 | 01:28:10,076 | You know did you go to guardian angel school? | You know did you go to guardian angel school? |
1469 | 01:28:10,160 | 01:28:12,536 | Because l feel like maybe you flunked out. | Because l feel like maybe you flunked out. |
1470 | 01:28:13,705 | 01:28:15,456 | Hey! Hey you little punks! | Hey! Hey you little punks! |
1471 | 01:28:15,749 | 01:28:16,999 | Come back here! | Come back here! |
1472 | 01:28:18,919 | 01:28:20,878 | Third time this week kids have ripped me off. | Third time this week kids have ripped me off. |
1473 | 01:28:21,171 | 01:28:24,173 | This used to be a town for familiesʼ community. | This used to be a town for familiesʼ community. |
1474 | 01:28:24,257 | 01:28:25,299 | Yeah. | Yeah. |
1475 | 01:28:25,384 | 01:28:26,968 | l don't know the last few decadesʼ | l don't know the last few decadesʼ |
1476 | 01:28:27,386 | 01:28:30,888 | hell something's gone missing. lt's like... Well it's like the glue is gone. | hell something's gone missing. lt's like... Well it's like the glue is gone. |
1477 | 01:28:31,181 | 01:28:33,599 | Someone stole Silvertown's glue? | Someone stole Silvertown's glue? |
1478 | 01:28:33,684 | 01:28:36,811 | Wait is that one of them metaphors you talked about? | Wait is that one of them metaphors you talked about? |
1479 | 01:28:36,895 | 01:28:40,022 | -Who are you talking to? -Oh sorry man. This here is Clair. | -Who are you talking to? -Oh sorry man. This here is Clair. |
1480 | 01:28:40,107 | 01:28:41,107 | He can't see me Joe. | He can't see me Joe. |
1481 | 01:28:42,109 | 01:28:45,778 | For Christ's sakeʼ kids ripping off comic booksʼ | For Christ's sakeʼ kids ripping off comic booksʼ |
1482 | 01:28:45,862 | 01:28:49,907 | assholes standing around talking to themselves. lt's all just bullshit! | assholes standing around talking to themselves. lt's all just bullshit! |
1483 | 01:28:53,870 | 01:28:54,870 | Man. | Man. |
1484 | 01:28:55,706 | 01:28:59,208 | Joe? Brandy's just outside of town. | Joe? Brandy's just outside of town. |
1485 | 01:29:00,419 | 01:29:01,419 | Brandy lives here? | Brandy lives here? |
1486 | 01:29:01,586 | 01:29:03,337 | This don't seem like her kind of place at all. | This don't seem like her kind of place at all. |
1487 | 01:29:03,422 | 01:29:05,464 | Well these days this is her kind of place. | Well these days this is her kind of place. |
1488 | 01:29:05,841 | 01:29:09,343 | Her life went down a different path on the day that she didn't meet you. | Her life went down a different path on the day that she didn't meet you. |
1489 | 01:29:09,636 | 01:29:14,432 | She's changed. l mean she is still cute as a little puppy. | She's changed. l mean she is still cute as a little puppy. |
1490 | 01:29:14,516 | 01:29:18,269 | lf that little puppy had great tits and a nice ass. | lf that little puppy had great tits and a nice ass. |
1491 | 01:29:18,353 | 01:29:19,353 | Man... | Man... |
1492 | 01:29:19,438 | 01:29:23,190 | lt's like diarrhea l can't stop. You should see for yourself though. | lt's like diarrhea l can't stop. You should see for yourself though. |
1493 | 01:29:25,944 | 01:29:27,862 | Hey man how did you do that? | Hey man how did you do that? |
1494 | 01:29:27,946 | 01:29:32,116 | Well because l'm an angel you moron! | Well because l'm an angel you moron! |
1495 | 01:29:37,706 | 01:29:42,293 | -Joe l want you to find Brandy. -Okay. | -Joe l want you to find Brandy. -Okay. |
1496 | 01:29:53,221 | 01:29:56,724 | You hear that? lt's poetry. | You hear that? lt's poetry. |
1497 | 01:29:56,850 | 01:29:57,850 | Poetry? | Poetry? |
1498 | 01:29:57,934 | 01:30:02,063 | Brandy finally gave me the gift l knew she always had to give. | Brandy finally gave me the gift l knew she always had to give. |
1499 | 01:30:02,147 | 01:30:04,065 | All the great words. | All the great words. |
1500 | 01:30:05,150 | 01:30:07,610 | The great magical turns of a phrase. | The great magical turns of a phrase. |
1501 | 01:30:07,903 | 01:30:11,489 | That lives within me now and informs my music. | That lives within me now and informs my music. |
1502 | 01:30:11,823 | 01:30:14,825 | lt's all because of her. So you know what l'm thinking? | lt's all because of her. So you know what l'm thinking? |
1503 | 01:30:15,035 | 01:30:16,702 | You all want to get wasted? | You all want to get wasted? |
1504 | 01:30:16,787 | 01:30:17,995 | -Yeah! -Get real wasted real fast! | -Yeah! -Get real wasted real fast! |
1505 | 01:30:18,163 | 01:30:20,164 | -Yeah! -Party like a rock star? | -Yeah! -Party like a rock star? |
1506 | 01:30:20,248 | 01:30:21,290 | Well all right! | Well all right! |
1507 | 01:30:21,374 | 01:30:22,917 | Yeah! | Yeah! |
1508 | 01:30:23,001 | 01:30:24,919 | Here's what l'm thinking tampons! | Here's what l'm thinking tampons! |
1509 | 01:30:26,838 | 01:30:28,130 | Come on man hear me out man. | Come on man hear me out man. |
1510 | 01:30:28,215 | 01:30:31,634 | You soak them in vodka and then we shove them straight up our asses. | You soak them in vodka and then we shove them straight up our asses. |
1511 | 01:30:34,179 | 01:30:35,262 | Wait what? | Wait what? |
1512 | 01:30:35,347 | 01:30:37,056 | No no it will get you hammered ASAP man. | No no it will get you hammered ASAP man. |
1513 | 01:30:37,140 | 01:30:38,766 | Mark McGrath does it every night. | Mark McGrath does it every night. |
1514 | 01:30:38,850 | 01:30:40,726 | l don't know. That seems weird a little. | l don't know. That seems weird a little. |
1515 | 01:30:40,852 | 01:30:42,686 | Do you guys question the iPhone? | Do you guys question the iPhone? |
1516 | 01:30:43,647 | 01:30:45,689 | Well yeah but this seems different than an iPhone. | Well yeah but this seems different than an iPhone. |
1517 | 01:30:46,066 | 01:30:48,109 | You can't compare an iPhone with a tampon. | You can't compare an iPhone with a tampon. |
1518 | 01:30:48,193 | 01:30:52,947 | Stop being such a bunch of pussies now! l demand you to stop being pussies. | Stop being such a bunch of pussies now! l demand you to stop being pussies. |
1519 | 01:30:53,031 | 01:30:56,867 | Now start to soaking and get to shoving! | Now start to soaking and get to shoving! |
1520 | 01:30:56,993 | 01:30:59,370 | Or you're out of my entourage! All of youse! | Or you're out of my entourage! All of youse! |
1521 | 01:30:59,454 | 01:31:00,663 | Keep soaking and shoving. Soak and shove. | Keep soaking and shoving. Soak and shove. |
1522 | 01:31:00,747 | 01:31:02,748 | -l want to hear you boys say it now. -Soak and shove. | -l want to hear you boys say it now. -Soak and shove. |
1523 | 01:31:02,874 | 01:31:05,084 | You better be right about that. | You better be right about that. |
1524 | 01:31:05,210 | 01:31:07,920 | -All right. -Oh yeah. | -All right. -Oh yeah. |
1525 | 01:31:08,046 | 01:31:09,672 | lt's hard to get in there boss. | lt's hard to get in there boss. |
1526 | 01:31:09,756 | 01:31:13,008 | Don't worry about it man. Just keep shoving it will get there. lt will get there. | Don't worry about it man. Just keep shoving it will get there. lt will get there. |
1527 | 01:31:17,264 | 01:31:18,556 | How are you doing Cal? | How are you doing Cal? |
1528 | 01:31:18,723 | 01:31:21,392 | Eight nine 1 0... | Eight nine 1 0... |
1529 | 01:31:21,726 | 01:31:26,772 | Oh yeah 14! These things are going up like easy-peasy. | Oh yeah 14! These things are going up like easy-peasy. |
1530 | 01:31:30,235 | 01:31:32,611 | -What? -Fourteen? | -What? -Fourteen? |
1531 | 01:31:33,613 | 01:31:36,949 | What do you say? What? Who said that? | What do you say? What? Who said that? |
1532 | 01:31:37,826 | 01:31:41,328 | What are you saying? l thought l was eating them? | What are you saying? l thought l was eating them? |
1533 | 01:31:41,746 | 01:31:43,831 | -l thought you said eat them? -He wasn't eating them man. | -l thought you said eat them? -He wasn't eating them man. |
1534 | 01:31:43,915 | 01:31:46,167 | You said eat them. l had like 14. | You said eat them. l had like 14. |
1535 | 01:31:46,251 | 01:31:48,252 | l was eating them. They taste like cotton candy. | l was eating them. They taste like cotton candy. |
1536 | 01:31:48,336 | 01:31:50,629 | Wait a minute did you say butt man? | Wait a minute did you say butt man? |
1537 | 01:31:50,881 | 01:31:54,341 | Oh my God Jimmy. He was putting them up his butt. | Oh my God Jimmy. He was putting them up his butt. |
1538 | 01:31:54,426 | 01:31:57,595 | This guy! This guy was putting them up his butt. | This guy! This guy was putting them up his butt. |
1539 | 01:31:57,888 | 01:31:59,930 | What an idiot! What an idiot! | What an idiot! What an idiot! |
1540 | 01:32:01,850 | 01:32:04,852 | They all went up your butt Cal. l seen them all go up your butt. | They all went up your butt Cal. l seen them all go up your butt. |
1541 | 01:32:04,936 | 01:32:07,188 | No. No! This sucks! | No. No! This sucks! |
1542 | 01:32:07,272 | 01:32:10,441 | No! l'm done with this party! You suck Jimmy! | No! l'm done with this party! You suck Jimmy! |
1543 | 01:32:10,609 | 01:32:14,111 | No you don't suck. You're great man. l love you. You're awesome. You're the best. | No you don't suck. You're great man. l love you. You're awesome. You're the best. |
1544 | 01:32:14,279 | 01:32:16,113 | You're the best. He sucks! | You're the best. He sucks! |
1545 | 01:32:16,198 | 01:32:18,616 | No l'm out. This is terrible. | No l'm out. This is terrible. |
1546 | 01:32:18,700 | 01:32:20,618 | -Dude stay! Stay! Stay! Hey! -Jimmy this is stupid. | -Dude stay! Stay! Stay! Hey! -Jimmy this is stupid. |
1547 | 01:32:20,744 | 01:32:22,912 | No Jimmy. What a dumb idea! | No Jimmy. What a dumb idea! |
1548 | 01:32:23,121 | 01:32:25,414 | Jimmy we got a situation out here. | Jimmy we got a situation out here. |
1549 | 01:32:25,498 | 01:32:27,666 | Come on man. We're doing a science experiment here. | Come on man. We're doing a science experiment here. |
1550 | 01:32:27,959 | 01:32:30,002 | Yeah but there's this guy out here. | Yeah but there's this guy out here. |
1551 | 01:32:30,837 | 01:32:31,879 | What's up? | What's up? |
1552 | 01:32:31,963 | 01:32:34,381 | Look man. We caught this dude without an invitation. | Look man. We caught this dude without an invitation. |
1553 | 01:32:34,466 | 01:32:35,841 | You want me to throw his ass out? | You want me to throw his ass out? |
1554 | 01:32:36,468 | 01:32:39,053 | -l know you right? -You know me yeah! | -l know you right? -You know me yeah! |
1555 | 01:32:39,137 | 01:32:42,640 | lt's Joe Dirt. Jimmy l can't believe you're such a huge star. | lt's Joe Dirt. Jimmy l can't believe you're such a huge star. |
1556 | 01:32:42,724 | 01:32:43,974 | This big house man. | This big house man. |
1557 | 01:32:44,100 | 01:32:46,227 | lt seems like just yesterday we was hanging out at the gas station... | lt seems like just yesterday we was hanging out at the gas station... |
1558 | 01:32:46,311 | 01:32:50,481 | Now hold up a second. l ain't never hung out with nobody named Joe Dirt. | Now hold up a second. l ain't never hung out with nobody named Joe Dirt. |
1559 | 01:32:50,815 | 01:32:52,650 | And l ain't about to start right now. | And l ain't about to start right now. |
1560 | 01:32:55,278 | 01:32:56,278 | Oh yeah. | Oh yeah. |
1561 | 01:32:57,280 | 01:32:59,865 | You knowʼ l think l confused you for somebody. | You knowʼ l think l confused you for somebody. |
1562 | 01:32:59,991 | 01:33:01,158 | Yeah l think you did. | Yeah l think you did. |
1563 | 01:33:01,243 | 01:33:04,745 | Hey get this boy a drink. Maybe clear his head up a little bit. | Hey get this boy a drink. Maybe clear his head up a little bit. |
1564 | 01:33:04,871 | 01:33:06,997 | -Nah man l'm cool. -No you ain't. | -Nah man l'm cool. -No you ain't. |
1565 | 01:33:07,999 | 01:33:09,833 | Dang l walk into that every time. | Dang l walk into that every time. |
1566 | 01:33:10,168 | 01:33:12,294 | Hey is Brandy around? | Hey is Brandy around? |
1567 | 01:33:12,420 | 01:33:14,171 | -What did you say? -ls Brandy here? | -What did you say? -ls Brandy here? |
1568 | 01:33:14,297 | 01:33:16,173 | Oh you asking about Brandy now? | Oh you asking about Brandy now? |
1569 | 01:33:16,299 | 01:33:19,677 | You coming up in my houseʼ actin' all buddy-buddy likeʼ | You coming up in my houseʼ actin' all buddy-buddy likeʼ |
1570 | 01:33:19,844 | 01:33:21,262 | and now you're hitting on my wife? | and now you're hitting on my wife? |
1571 | 01:33:21,471 | 01:33:22,471 | No l didn't mean... | No l didn't mean... |
1572 | 01:33:22,555 | 01:33:25,099 | Your wife? Brandy's not your... | Your wife? Brandy's not your... |
1573 | 01:33:25,308 | 01:33:26,892 | -Yeah. -What? | -Yeah. -What? |
1574 | 01:33:27,394 | 01:33:32,898 | Oh my God! When you took my place on the porch saving Charlie's balls that's right. | Oh my God! When you took my place on the porch saving Charlie's balls that's right. |
1575 | 01:33:33,233 | 01:33:34,441 | Wait a minute. | Wait a minute. |
1576 | 01:33:34,526 | 01:33:37,903 | You're that dude that walked up on me and Brandy that night on the porch | You're that dude that walked up on me and Brandy that night on the porch |
1577 | 01:33:37,988 | 01:33:41,448 | when l was saving that stupid muttʼ or something like that. | when l was saving that stupid muttʼ or something like that. |
1578 | 01:33:41,533 | 01:33:44,034 | And you was talking aboutʼ "Oh Brandy l love you. | And you was talking aboutʼ "Oh Brandy l love you. |
1579 | 01:33:44,119 | 01:33:46,996 | "l got so much money it's coming out of my butt." | "l got so much money it's coming out of my butt." |
1580 | 01:33:47,080 | 01:33:49,290 | lt's no wonder Colt Ford wrote a song about you. | lt's no wonder Colt Ford wrote a song about you. |
1581 | 01:33:49,374 | 01:33:51,083 | Colt Ford wrote a song about me? | Colt Ford wrote a song about me? |
1582 | 01:33:51,167 | 01:33:53,085 | Yeah, man. The Ballad of Joe Dirt. | Yeah, man. The Ballad of Joe Dirt. |
1583 | 01:33:53,712 | 01:33:56,714 | And here you are stupid mulletʼ | And here you are stupid mulletʼ |
1584 | 01:33:57,382 | 01:34:00,551 | stupid face and all of that. | stupid face and all of that. |
1585 | 01:34:03,096 | 01:34:05,097 | Hello ladies! | Hello ladies! |
1586 | 01:34:07,183 | 01:34:09,226 | Lookey here lookey here! | Lookey here lookey here! |
1587 | 01:34:09,769 | 01:34:12,062 | Hey Jimmy ain't you just say you married to Brandy now? | Hey Jimmy ain't you just say you married to Brandy now? |
1588 | 01:34:13,815 | 01:34:18,610 | She does her thing l do my thing. That's the way that thing goes. | She does her thing l do my thing. That's the way that thing goes. |
1589 | 01:34:19,571 | 01:34:21,363 | How you doing? Where are your friends at? | How you doing? Where are your friends at? |
1590 | 01:34:21,573 | 01:34:24,241 | Have you seen the Jacuzzi yet? You're going to love it. | Have you seen the Jacuzzi yet? You're going to love it. |
1591 | 01:34:24,534 | 01:34:25,993 | Come on now. You got a twin sister? | Come on now. You got a twin sister? |
1592 | 01:34:26,077 | 01:34:27,202 | Not cool. | Not cool. |
1593 | 01:34:31,875 | 01:34:32,875 | Hey! | Hey! |
1594 | 01:34:33,835 | 01:34:34,877 | Brandy! | Brandy! |
1595 | 01:34:37,255 | 01:34:39,089 | -How do l light this? -This way babe. | -How do l light this? -This way babe. |
1596 | 01:34:39,758 | 01:34:40,924 | You do it. | You do it. |
1597 | 01:34:41,843 | 01:34:43,302 | This way silly. | This way silly. |
1598 | 01:34:44,429 | 01:34:45,429 | Brandy? | Brandy? |
1599 | 01:34:46,514 | 01:34:47,598 | Hey! | Hey! |
1600 | 01:34:49,017 | 01:34:51,894 | Hey! l remember you. | Hey! l remember you. |
1601 | 01:34:52,562 | 01:34:54,271 | You're that rich guy. | You're that rich guy. |
1602 | 01:34:54,356 | 01:34:56,732 | You were going to help me with Charlie when he was stuck. | You were going to help me with Charlie when he was stuck. |
1603 | 01:34:56,816 | 01:34:58,901 | -Yeah. -Until Jimmy beat you to itʼ | -Yeah. -Until Jimmy beat you to itʼ |
1604 | 01:34:58,985 | 01:35:00,486 | and helped me instead. | and helped me instead. |
1605 | 01:35:01,696 | 01:35:04,448 | Might have been the last time Jimmy helped me with anything. | Might have been the last time Jimmy helped me with anything. |
1606 | 01:35:05,367 | 01:35:08,494 | Look it's the moron with the Tennessee top hat. | Look it's the moron with the Tennessee top hat. |
1607 | 01:35:09,954 | 01:35:11,413 | Tennessee top hat. | Tennessee top hat. |
1608 | 01:35:12,415 | 01:35:14,958 | That's actually a good one fellas. l had not heard that one before. | That's actually a good one fellas. l had not heard that one before. |
1609 | 01:35:15,460 | 01:35:16,960 | -They've got some new stuff. -Oh yeah? | -They've got some new stuff. -Oh yeah? |
1610 | 01:35:17,087 | 01:35:19,880 | l bet you never heard that you're a winner either! | l bet you never heard that you're a winner either! |
1611 | 01:35:21,132 | 01:35:22,508 | Jimmy would have liked that one! | Jimmy would have liked that one! |
1612 | 01:35:22,926 | 01:35:24,093 | l love Jimmy! | l love Jimmy! |
1613 | 01:35:24,302 | 01:35:25,594 | Where is Jimmy? | Where is Jimmy? |
1614 | 01:35:25,845 | 01:35:27,638 | Forget about Jimmy baby. | Forget about Jimmy baby. |
1615 | 01:35:28,181 | 01:35:30,974 | -You're with me now. -Katrina you're so sweet. | -You're with me now. -Katrina you're so sweet. |
1616 | 01:35:31,142 | 01:35:33,811 | -You're such a good friend to me. -Oh yeah. | -You're such a good friend to me. -Oh yeah. |
1617 | 01:35:33,978 | 01:35:36,522 | You look so hot tonight Brandy. | You look so hot tonight Brandy. |
1618 | 01:35:37,399 | 01:35:39,858 | -Doesn't she look hot boys? -Yeah! | -Doesn't she look hot boys? -Yeah! |
1619 | 01:35:41,277 | 01:35:43,237 | l don't think she looks that hot. | l don't think she looks that hot. |
1620 | 01:35:43,822 | 01:35:46,657 | l mean she's gorgeousʼ | l mean she's gorgeousʼ |
1621 | 01:35:46,825 | 01:35:49,660 | but that's not the Brandy l'm used to. You don't look like that. | but that's not the Brandy l'm used to. You don't look like that. |
1622 | 01:35:49,744 | 01:35:51,995 | l mean you look slutty hot and that's good. | l mean you look slutty hot and that's good. |
1623 | 01:35:52,163 | 01:35:54,915 | Slutty hot is goodʼ it's just not the regular hot. | Slutty hot is goodʼ it's just not the regular hot. |
1624 | 01:35:55,208 | 01:35:57,501 | But believe me there's a place for slutty hot guys like that. | But believe me there's a place for slutty hot guys like that. |
1625 | 01:35:57,710 | 01:36:00,879 | But Brandy isn't that kind of hotʼ you're innocent sweet hot. | But Brandy isn't that kind of hotʼ you're innocent sweet hot. |
1626 | 01:36:01,131 | 01:36:04,633 | l mean sluts are great. You know what? l'm digging a hole. l can get out of it. | l mean sluts are great. You know what? l'm digging a hole. l can get out of it. |
1627 | 01:36:05,218 | 01:36:07,386 | Brandy what's been happening in Silvertown? | Brandy what's been happening in Silvertown? |
1628 | 01:36:14,352 | 01:36:16,395 | Brandy's been happening. | Brandy's been happening. |
1629 | 01:36:17,105 | 01:36:20,607 | Oh boy l didn't think those M's was ever going to stop. | Oh boy l didn't think those M's was ever going to stop. |
1630 | 01:36:21,025 | 01:36:22,985 | This girl's got more M's than M&M's. | This girl's got more M's than M&M's. |
1631 | 01:36:24,696 | 01:36:25,821 | 'Cause M&M's... | 'Cause M&M's... |
1632 | 01:36:26,156 | 01:36:27,698 | No laughs. Absolutely zero. | No laughs. Absolutely zero. |
1633 | 01:36:27,782 | 01:36:29,366 | When Jimmy's here you laugh at everything... | When Jimmy's here you laugh at everything... |
1634 | 01:36:29,492 | 01:36:31,034 | He cuts a fartʼ everyone cracks up for two hours. | He cuts a fartʼ everyone cracks up for two hours. |
1635 | 01:36:31,119 | 01:36:34,037 | This town is called Jimmy Town now. | This town is called Jimmy Town now. |
1636 | 01:36:34,789 | 01:36:38,500 | My husband renamed it. l kind of miss the old name. | My husband renamed it. l kind of miss the old name. |
1637 | 01:36:39,711 | 01:36:41,253 | And all that came with it. | And all that came with it. |
1638 | 01:36:42,547 | 01:36:43,672 | Brandy? | Brandy? |
1639 | 01:36:43,882 | 01:36:47,384 | l'd like to be all that came with it to you. | l'd like to be all that came with it to you. |
1640 | 01:36:48,678 | 01:36:50,345 | Katrina that tickles. | Katrina that tickles. |
1641 | 01:36:50,722 | 01:36:53,849 | Jimmy will get mad. He always gets mad. | Jimmy will get mad. He always gets mad. |
1642 | 01:36:54,309 | 01:36:57,811 | No he'll just grab a camera and pop a rod. | No he'll just grab a camera and pop a rod. |
1643 | 01:36:58,229 | 01:37:00,397 | You're just a lost little girl Brandy. | You're just a lost little girl Brandy. |
1644 | 01:37:00,773 | 01:37:02,441 | l didn't used to be. | l didn't used to be. |
1645 | 01:37:02,901 | 01:37:06,153 | l used to be a strong independent woman. | l used to be a strong independent woman. |
1646 | 01:37:06,696 | 01:37:08,614 | l don't know what happened to me. | l don't know what happened to me. |
1647 | 01:37:08,990 | 01:37:11,366 | -lt could be the heroin. -Heroin man? | -lt could be the heroin. -Heroin man? |
1648 | 01:37:11,826 | 01:37:14,244 | What's going on in this town? lt's all mixed up. | What's going on in this town? lt's all mixed up. |
1649 | 01:37:14,662 | 01:37:17,414 | l don't know what is and isn't mixed up anymore. | l don't know what is and isn't mixed up anymore. |
1650 | 01:37:17,499 | 01:37:19,124 | You're so deep Brandy. | You're so deep Brandy. |
1651 | 01:37:19,209 | 01:37:21,585 | You like when l do this to you don't you? | You like when l do this to you don't you? |
1652 | 01:37:22,253 | 01:37:25,756 | l bet you're wearing those silk little panties l bought for you ain't you? | l bet you're wearing those silk little panties l bought for you ain't you? |
1653 | 01:37:26,382 | 01:37:29,134 | Don't say ain't or your mother will faint. | Don't say ain't or your mother will faint. |
1654 | 01:37:29,219 | 01:37:33,013 | -Your father will fall into a bucket of paint. -Your father will fall into a bucket of paint. | -Your father will fall into a bucket of paint. -Your father will fall into a bucket of paint. |
1655 | 01:37:34,265 | 01:37:37,142 | Wow. You and me. | Wow. You and me. |
1656 | 01:37:37,977 | 01:37:40,020 | We have a connection Joe Dirt. | We have a connection Joe Dirt. |
1657 | 01:37:40,104 | 01:37:41,271 | We used to always say that. | We used to always say that. |
1658 | 01:37:41,523 | 01:37:45,275 | l say it all the time to our kids... To my kids. | l say it all the time to our kids... To my kids. |
1659 | 01:37:46,444 | 01:37:49,530 | Kiss me Brandy. Like you mean it girl. | Kiss me Brandy. Like you mean it girl. |
1660 | 01:37:50,156 | 01:37:53,242 | Don't be halfway with me no more Brandy. | Don't be halfway with me no more Brandy. |
1661 | 01:37:53,368 | 01:37:56,954 | Okay that's it. Show's over everybody. Stop it right there that's enough. | Okay that's it. Show's over everybody. Stop it right there that's enough. |
1662 | 01:37:57,080 | 01:37:58,622 | -What are you doing? -What the hell? | -What are you doing? -What the hell? |
1663 | 01:37:58,706 | 01:37:59,790 | What are you queer? | What are you queer? |
1664 | 01:38:01,751 | 01:38:04,127 | Brandy in another life we get marriedʼ we fall in love. | Brandy in another life we get marriedʼ we fall in love. |
1665 | 01:38:04,337 | 01:38:07,381 | We have three beautiful kidsʼ Cheyenne Abilene and Dakota. | We have three beautiful kidsʼ Cheyenne Abilene and Dakota. |
1666 | 01:38:08,424 | 01:38:10,259 | Those are such sweet names. | Those are such sweet names. |
1667 | 01:38:10,343 | 01:38:11,760 | Well that's because you picked them. | Well that's because you picked them. |
1668 | 01:38:11,844 | 01:38:13,303 | -l picked dumb names. -Stay on topic Joe. | -l picked dumb names. -Stay on topic Joe. |
1669 | 01:38:13,930 | 01:38:16,890 | Man you scare me because you come out of nowhere sometimes. | Man you scare me because you come out of nowhere sometimes. |
1670 | 01:38:16,975 | 01:38:19,560 | Tell her. Tell her what you've learned. | Tell her. Tell her what you've learned. |
1671 | 01:38:19,644 | 01:38:21,478 | -Tell her how you feel now. -Okay. | -Tell her how you feel now. -Okay. |
1672 | 01:38:21,604 | 01:38:22,771 | l think l got it. | l think l got it. |
1673 | 01:38:22,897 | 01:38:24,314 | -Who's he talking to? -l don't know. | -Who's he talking to? -l don't know. |
1674 | 01:38:24,399 | 01:38:26,984 | All right Brandy. Me and you was together. | All right Brandy. Me and you was together. |
1675 | 01:38:27,235 | 01:38:29,403 | And everything was going greatʼ and we was really happy. | And everything was going greatʼ and we was really happy. |
1676 | 01:38:29,487 | 01:38:32,573 | And then something terrible happenedʼ and l got taken away from you and the kidsʼ | And then something terrible happenedʼ and l got taken away from you and the kidsʼ |
1677 | 01:38:32,657 | 01:38:36,577 | and then nowʼ l think l'm sent back to learn a lesson | and then nowʼ l think l'm sent back to learn a lesson |
1678 | 01:38:37,036 | 01:38:39,663 | -that if l have money... -What the hell! | -that if l have money... -What the hell! |
1679 | 01:38:39,789 | 01:38:43,834 | Come on! Damn it Joe you still don't get it? | Come on! Damn it Joe you still don't get it? |
1680 | 01:38:44,919 | 01:38:48,005 | Look they told me you were dumbʼ but it's almost like you're an | Look they told me you were dumbʼ but it's almost like you're an |
1681 | 01:38:48,089 | 01:38:50,549 | "l'm joking" kind of dumb. Look l give up here. | "l'm joking" kind of dumb. Look l give up here. |
1682 | 01:38:50,717 | 01:38:52,426 | l guess l'm not going to get my wings | l guess l'm not going to get my wings |
1683 | 01:38:52,510 | 01:38:55,053 | and l'm never going to hear that beautiful sound. | and l'm never going to hear that beautiful sound. |
1684 | 01:38:55,722 | 01:38:56,888 | What sound? | What sound? |
1685 | 01:38:56,973 | 01:39:00,434 | Well you hear a certain kind of clang when an angel gets its wings. Whatever. | Well you hear a certain kind of clang when an angel gets its wings. Whatever. |
1686 | 01:39:00,518 | 01:39:02,561 | -l look... -Oh wait. | -l look... -Oh wait. |
1687 | 01:39:02,645 | 01:39:06,148 | When an angel gets its wings? That's from a movie or something like a TA show? | When an angel gets its wings? That's from a movie or something like a TA show? |
1688 | 01:39:06,274 | 01:39:07,816 | Shut up dude! | Shut up dude! |
1689 | 01:39:08,276 | 01:39:10,652 | You're seriously bumming out the vibe in this room. | You're seriously bumming out the vibe in this room. |
1690 | 01:39:10,945 | 01:39:14,072 | Brandy here had a monsoon in her pantiesʼ thinking about me. | Brandy here had a monsoon in her pantiesʼ thinking about me. |
1691 | 01:39:14,365 | 01:39:17,326 | And then you walk in here not remembering lines from It's a WonderfuI Life. | And then you walk in here not remembering lines from It's a WonderfuI Life. |
1692 | 01:39:17,410 | 01:39:18,452 | That's it. | That's it. |
1693 | 01:39:18,536 | 01:39:21,413 | l'm trying to get downʼ and you're getting me down. | l'm trying to get downʼ and you're getting me down. |
1694 | 01:39:24,375 | 01:39:27,002 | Look this is just too confusing. | Look this is just too confusing. |
1695 | 01:39:27,253 | 01:39:28,378 | l've had too much to drink. | l've had too much to drink. |
1696 | 01:39:29,172 | 01:39:30,380 | l got to go. | l got to go. |
1697 | 01:39:31,841 | 01:39:33,216 | -l got to go. -Let me... Can l talk... | -l got to go. -Let me... Can l talk... |
1698 | 01:39:34,344 | 01:39:35,427 | What did you do? | What did you do? |
1699 | 01:39:39,682 | 01:39:42,142 | Brandy l think l know what l'm supposed to know now. | Brandy l think l know what l'm supposed to know now. |
1700 | 01:39:42,226 | 01:39:43,393 | l'm going to be different! | l'm going to be different! |
1701 | 01:39:43,561 | 01:39:45,395 | l don't know what you're sayingʼ just please stop. | l don't know what you're sayingʼ just please stop. |
1702 | 01:39:46,022 | 01:39:47,564 | l'm married to Jimmy. | l'm married to Jimmy. |
1703 | 01:39:48,024 | 01:39:50,567 | But he doesn't feel like he's married to me. | But he doesn't feel like he's married to me. |
1704 | 01:39:51,402 | 01:39:54,529 | My life feels like it is spinning out of control. | My life feels like it is spinning out of control. |
1705 | 01:39:56,908 | 01:39:58,241 | Goodbye Joe Dirt. | Goodbye Joe Dirt. |
1706 | 01:40:03,122 | 01:40:04,456 | Well that went great. | Well that went great. |
1707 | 01:40:05,875 | 01:40:09,086 | l don't know what's going on anymore man. l don't know what l'm supposed to learn. | l don't know what's going on anymore man. l don't know what l'm supposed to learn. |
1708 | 01:40:09,545 | 01:40:10,754 | Well you're not very bright. | Well you're not very bright. |
1709 | 01:40:11,089 | 01:40:13,256 | Come on l ain't no toaster scientist. | Come on l ain't no toaster scientist. |
1710 | 01:40:13,341 | 01:40:15,592 | What am l supposed to learn? l bench 1 50 on a good day. | What am l supposed to learn? l bench 1 50 on a good day. |
1711 | 01:40:16,135 | 01:40:18,929 | The fact that l'm supposed to memorize a spark-plug gap | The fact that l'm supposed to memorize a spark-plug gap |
1712 | 01:40:19,222 | 01:40:20,972 | on a Plymouth 383? | on a Plymouth 383? |
1713 | 01:40:21,933 | 01:40:23,642 | l don't know. l just want my old life back. | l don't know. l just want my old life back. |
1714 | 01:40:23,768 | 01:40:24,935 | 1 50's not that great. | 1 50's not that great. |
1715 | 01:40:26,562 | 01:40:27,896 | Hey Clair. | Hey Clair. |
1716 | 01:40:28,022 | 01:40:30,524 | Hey wait you're that woman that yelled at me on the bus bench. | Hey wait you're that woman that yelled at me on the bus bench. |
1717 | 01:40:30,608 | 01:40:32,609 | That's right. You fart-eater. | That's right. You fart-eater. |
1718 | 01:40:32,860 | 01:40:37,239 | l'm the good witch. l'm the one that sent this hunky angel to you. | l'm the good witch. l'm the one that sent this hunky angel to you. |
1719 | 01:40:37,448 | 01:40:39,991 | -No offence Clair. -No offence? Really? Okay. | -No offence Clair. -No offence? Really? Okay. |
1720 | 01:40:40,076 | 01:40:44,162 | He's like that angel that saved that cracker-ass Jimmy Stewart. | He's like that angel that saved that cracker-ass Jimmy Stewart. |
1721 | 01:40:44,288 | 01:40:46,581 | And helped that white racist-ass town. | And helped that white racist-ass town. |
1722 | 01:40:46,749 | 01:40:50,794 | Tell me something how come they don't ever have any angels to save a black town? | Tell me something how come they don't ever have any angels to save a black town? |
1723 | 01:40:51,003 | 01:40:53,505 | You don't think black towns could use some help once in a while? | You don't think black towns could use some help once in a while? |
1724 | 01:40:53,798 | 01:40:57,300 | You ever seen Detroit? That town is sucking some misery dick. | You ever seen Detroit? That town is sucking some misery dick. |
1725 | 01:40:57,593 | 01:41:01,346 | How come them bitches in Hollywood don't throw us a bone every once in a while? | How come them bitches in Hollywood don't throw us a bone every once in a while? |
1726 | 01:41:01,973 | 01:41:03,306 | Wait a second you're the good witch? | Wait a second you're the good witch? |
1727 | 01:41:03,933 | 01:41:07,561 | Well maybe you should work on your like presentationʼ | Well maybe you should work on your like presentationʼ |
1728 | 01:41:07,645 | 01:41:09,604 | because it comes off a little rough around the edges. | because it comes off a little rough around the edges. |
1729 | 01:41:10,106 | 01:41:11,648 | But l have to say ma'amʼ with all due respectʼ | But l have to say ma'amʼ with all due respectʼ |
1730 | 01:41:12,150 | 01:41:13,984 | this is who l am. l'm Joe Dirt. | this is who l am. l'm Joe Dirt. |
1731 | 01:41:14,485 | 01:41:15,944 | Okay? And l'm fine with it. | Okay? And l'm fine with it. |
1732 | 01:41:16,112 | 01:41:18,113 | l'm not mean to other people like you are. | l'm not mean to other people like you are. |
1733 | 01:41:18,364 | 01:41:20,991 | ln fact l made some money with this guy Clemʼ | ln fact l made some money with this guy Clemʼ |
1734 | 01:41:21,325 | 01:41:23,160 | and if you need it for that city Detroitʼ | and if you need it for that city Detroitʼ |
1735 | 01:41:23,578 | 01:41:25,954 | then you could have it all to help them. l don't care. | then you could have it all to help them. l don't care. |
1736 | 01:41:26,831 | 01:41:30,083 | Because l thought it was about being richʼ and showing my family l had a lot of moneyʼ | Because l thought it was about being richʼ and showing my family l had a lot of moneyʼ |
1737 | 01:41:30,168 | 01:41:32,169 | and being famous like Lynyrd Skynyrdʼ | and being famous like Lynyrd Skynyrdʼ |
1738 | 01:41:33,004 | 01:41:34,045 | but that don't matter. | but that don't matter. |
1739 | 01:41:35,840 | 01:41:39,176 | lt's about me being me. Just me. | lt's about me being me. Just me. |
1740 | 01:41:39,886 | 01:41:41,011 | And l'm okay with that. | And l'm okay with that. |
1741 | 01:41:41,971 | 01:41:43,138 | And they're okay with that. | And they're okay with that. |
1742 | 01:41:44,766 | 01:41:47,934 | -Well l'll be dipped in shit. -Holy hell he gets it. | -Well l'll be dipped in shit. -Holy hell he gets it. |
1743 | 01:41:48,603 | 01:41:49,728 | What? What happened? | What? What happened? |
1744 | 01:41:50,021 | 01:41:51,313 | You got it Joe Dirt. | You got it Joe Dirt. |
1745 | 01:41:51,564 | 01:41:54,191 | -You learned your lesson. -Yeah you're going home Joe. | -You learned your lesson. -Yeah you're going home Joe. |
1746 | 01:41:54,692 | 01:41:56,193 | You're going home. You know... | You're going home. You know... |
1747 | 01:41:57,361 | 01:41:59,404 | l was Foggle did you know that? | l was Foggle did you know that? |
1748 | 01:41:59,530 | 01:42:03,033 | You was Foggle? Wait you're both sort of like homophobic. | You was Foggle? Wait you're both sort of like homophobic. |
1749 | 01:42:03,117 | 01:42:04,117 | Maybe yeah l see it. | Maybe yeah l see it. |
1750 | 01:42:04,202 | 01:42:06,703 | Well l was actingʼ and l made some interesting choices. | Well l was actingʼ and l made some interesting choices. |
1751 | 01:42:06,829 | 01:42:08,371 | Well a little big at firstʼ | Well a little big at firstʼ |
1752 | 01:42:08,456 | 01:42:10,624 | but l thought l reeled him in. l had to be convincing. | but l thought l reeled him in. l had to be convincing. |
1753 | 01:42:10,708 | 01:42:13,335 | -Those guy would have raped me... -Oh fuck that acting shit! | -Those guy would have raped me... -Oh fuck that acting shit! |
1754 | 01:42:13,503 | 01:42:14,878 | This boy's going home. | This boy's going home. |
1755 | 01:42:15,046 | 01:42:18,381 | Click those boots together Joe Dirtʼ you know what to say. | Click those boots together Joe Dirtʼ you know what to say. |
1756 | 01:42:18,466 | 01:42:20,258 | l just say "There ain't no place like home"? | l just say "There ain't no place like home"? |
1757 | 01:42:20,384 | 01:42:22,552 | Joe l want to thank you for giving my wings. | Joe l want to thank you for giving my wings. |
1758 | 01:42:23,262 | 01:42:24,387 | You got your wings? | You got your wings? |
1759 | 01:42:24,555 | 01:42:25,889 | l did. Well l'm going to get them now. | l did. Well l'm going to get them now. |
1760 | 01:42:26,557 | 01:42:28,391 | -Am l supposed to hear a clang? -You will. | -Am l supposed to hear a clang? -You will. |
1761 | 01:42:31,103 | 01:42:32,312 | Daddy... | Daddy... |
1762 | 01:42:32,396 | 01:42:35,482 | You're the most handsomest man that l have ever seen. | You're the most handsomest man that l have ever seen. |
1763 | 01:42:35,566 | 01:42:37,859 | Your dance with Joe Dirt is done. | Your dance with Joe Dirt is done. |
1764 | 01:42:38,486 | 01:42:39,903 | Life's a garden dig it. | Life's a garden dig it. |
1765 | 01:42:40,029 | 01:42:41,112 | When are you coming back? | When are you coming back? |
1766 | 01:42:41,197 | 01:42:43,573 | -Home is where you make it. -You like to see homos naked? | -Home is where you make it. -You like to see homos naked? |
1767 | 01:42:43,658 | 01:42:47,035 | No no no no. Home is where you make it. | No no no no. Home is where you make it. |
1768 | 01:42:50,998 | 01:42:53,500 | Ain't nothing like home. Ain't nothing like home. | Ain't nothing like home. Ain't nothing like home. |
1769 | 01:42:53,751 | 01:42:55,418 | Joe! Wake up! | Joe! Wake up! |
1770 | 01:42:55,586 | 01:42:56,586 | -Joe? -Brandy! | -Joe? -Brandy! |
1771 | 01:42:57,630 | 01:42:58,922 | ls this a dream? | ls this a dream? |
1772 | 01:42:59,173 | 01:43:00,257 | ls this a dream again? | ls this a dream again? |
1773 | 01:43:00,675 | 01:43:03,176 | No it's real! Get over here. Come on! | No it's real! Get over here. Come on! |
1774 | 01:43:03,594 | 01:43:05,011 | Where have you guys been? | Where have you guys been? |
1775 | 01:43:07,014 | 01:43:09,599 | l missed you! Look at you huh? | l missed you! Look at you huh? |
1776 | 01:43:14,313 | 01:43:16,273 | -Hey! -Hey baby. | -Hey! -Hey baby. |
1777 | 01:43:17,149 | 01:43:19,317 | -l think it's good. -Oh my God! | -l think it's good. -Oh my God! |
1778 | 01:43:19,861 | 01:43:22,195 | -l know l gotta get 'em. -Get his stick! | -l know l gotta get 'em. -Get his stick! |
1779 | 01:43:24,949 | 01:43:26,199 | Come on you little hicks. | Come on you little hicks. |
1780 | 01:43:27,827 | 01:43:30,829 | So that is the whole story it's crazy. | So that is the whole story it's crazy. |
1781 | 01:43:30,913 | 01:43:33,373 | Joe we love you just the way you are. | Joe we love you just the way you are. |
1782 | 01:43:33,791 | 01:43:35,166 | We do Daddy! | We do Daddy! |
1783 | 01:43:35,334 | 01:43:36,376 | We love you! | We love you! |
1784 | 01:43:36,460 | 01:43:40,213 | We wouldn't trade you for any other Daddy in the whole wide world. | We wouldn't trade you for any other Daddy in the whole wide world. |
1785 | 01:43:40,298 | 01:43:42,674 | Did you practice that? lt sounds too good. | Did you practice that? lt sounds too good. |
1786 | 01:43:42,758 | 01:43:43,758 | No. | No. |
1787 | 01:43:43,843 | 01:43:45,260 | Hold up hold up. | Hold up hold up. |
1788 | 01:43:46,262 | 01:43:48,179 | Wait a second this looks familiar. | Wait a second this looks familiar. |
1789 | 01:43:48,639 | 01:43:49,639 | What's wrong? | What's wrong? |
1790 | 01:43:49,765 | 01:43:51,224 | There's no way. | There's no way. |
1791 | 01:43:51,726 | 01:43:54,144 | That was all a dream. lt doesn't matter never mind. | That was all a dream. lt doesn't matter never mind. |
1792 | 01:43:54,979 | 01:43:56,021 | What is it Daddy? | What is it Daddy? |
1793 | 01:43:56,355 | 01:43:57,480 | lt... | lt... |
1794 | 01:44:18,210 | 01:44:20,337 | Babe we're rich. | Babe we're rich. |
1795 | 01:44:20,963 | 01:44:24,215 | Rich? Why you've always been rich Joe Dirt. | Rich? Why you've always been rich Joe Dirt. |
1796 | 01:44:24,842 | 01:44:27,302 | You just needed to find that out for yourself. | You just needed to find that out for yourself. |
1797 | 01:44:31,515 | 01:44:33,600 | Daddy and Mommy! | Daddy and Mommy! |
1798 | 01:44:34,310 | 01:44:35,310 | That's right! | That's right! |
1799 | 01:44:36,687 | 01:44:38,521 | Mommy likes me. Come on let's go. | Mommy likes me. Come on let's go. |
1800 | 01:44:39,231 | 01:44:40,482 | Come on babies. | Come on babies. |
1801 | 01:45:09,095 | 01:45:12,222 | He's got a backhoe it's Caterpillar yellow | He's got a backhoe it's Caterpillar yellow |
1802 | 01:45:12,306 | 01:45:15,558 | He's a heller of a feller a drinking storyteller, with a DUl | He's a heller of a feller a drinking storyteller, with a DUl |
1803 | 01:45:15,643 | 01:45:17,143 | He's illegal to drive | He's illegal to drive |
1804 | 01:45:17,228 | 01:45:19,896 | But he legally drinks and gets illegally high | But he legally drinks and gets illegally high |
1805 | 01:45:20,564 | 01:45:25,068 | One night, while he's up in the sky he looked at that backhoe, asked himself | One night, while he's up in the sky he looked at that backhoe, asked himself |
1806 | 01:45:25,361 | 01:45:26,361 | "Why not?" | "Why not?" |
1807 | 01:45:26,487 | 01:45:30,824 | l'm going to drive that thing lt's a loophole, man, the DUl don't pertain | l'm going to drive that thing lt's a loophole, man, the DUl don't pertain |
1808 | 01:45:30,950 | 01:45:35,036 | l'm only driving to the bar down on Main Street | l'm only driving to the bar down on Main Street |
1809 | 01:45:35,246 | 01:45:38,164 | Now he's digging | Now he's digging |
1810 | 01:45:38,249 | 01:45:40,959 | Got a hot little honey hanging out of that cab | Got a hot little honey hanging out of that cab |
1811 | 01:45:41,043 | 01:45:43,086 | Just digging | Just digging |
1812 | 01:45:43,170 | 01:45:46,256 | Got the windows tinted and a bass tune hitting | Got the windows tinted and a bass tune hitting |
1813 | 01:45:46,424 | 01:45:47,882 | Digging! | Digging! |
1814 | 01:45:48,676 | 01:45:51,594 | Creeping past the po-po, incognito | Creeping past the po-po, incognito |
1815 | 01:45:51,679 | 01:45:54,305 | Like Joe Dirt, that's how he's living | Like Joe Dirt, that's how he's living |
1816 | 01:45:54,432 | 01:45:57,600 | Life's a garden, man and he's just digging | Life's a garden, man and he's just digging |
1817 | 01:46:06,610 | 01:46:09,571 | Wearing a cat hat with a meow-meow kitty | Wearing a cat hat with a meow-meow kitty |
1818 | 01:46:09,655 | 01:46:11,781 | Rolls up in the club, pimpin' like Diddy | Rolls up in the club, pimpin' like Diddy |
1819 | 01:46:11,866 | 01:46:14,784 | With the beer tipping Just sippin' on suds | With the beer tipping Just sippin' on suds |
1820 | 01:46:14,910 | 01:46:16,995 | Putting shots back and tripping with his buds | Putting shots back and tripping with his buds |
1821 | 01:46:17,079 | 01:46:18,079 | No thank you. | No thank you. |
1822 | 01:46:19,957 | 01:46:23,918 | Old comic books in mint condition for 1 0 cents apiece. | Old comic books in mint condition for 1 0 cents apiece. |
1823 | 01:46:24,336 | 01:46:25,336 | Give old... | Give old... |
1824 | 01:46:28,382 | 01:46:31,718 | Well long story short we stomped those three dudes so hard | Well long story short we stomped those three dudes so hard |
1825 | 01:46:31,802 | 01:46:33,678 | they got to take their boots off to piss. | they got to take their boots off to piss. |
1826 | 01:46:37,808 | 01:46:40,101 | Anyway this... Motherfucker! | Anyway this... Motherfucker! |
1827 | 01:46:40,269 | 01:46:42,187 | Seriously? Seriously? | Seriously? Seriously? |
1828 | 01:46:42,271 | 01:46:45,356 | -What is it 201 5? -Oh my God. | -What is it 201 5? -Oh my God. |
1829 | 01:46:45,733 | 01:46:48,902 | l thought l had this turned off. This is embarrassing. | l thought l had this turned off. This is embarrassing. |
1830 | 01:46:50,279 | 01:46:53,323 | Joe l want to talk to you. | Joe l want to talk to you. |
1831 | 01:46:55,326 | 01:46:59,621 | l like you. You have funny hair but l like you. | l like you. You have funny hair but l like you. |
1832 | 01:47:01,665 | 01:47:03,333 | Hey funny guy. | Hey funny guy. |
1833 | 01:47:09,757 | 01:47:12,509 | As a matter of fact if you want to stay awake right nowʼ | As a matter of fact if you want to stay awake right nowʼ |
1834 | 01:47:12,635 | 01:47:15,261 | you'll still be on the roadʼ in the middle of nowhere. | you'll still be on the roadʼ in the middle of nowhere. |
1835 | 01:47:15,346 | 01:47:16,721 | Your call. REM. | Your call. REM. |
1836 | 01:47:22,645 | 01:47:24,020 | That's so stupid. | That's so stupid. |
1837 | 01:47:24,688 | 01:47:25,688 | No thank you. | No thank you. |
1838 | 01:47:26,524 | 01:47:31,361 | Man old comic books in mint condition for 1 0 cents apiece. | Man old comic books in mint condition for 1 0 cents apiece. |
1839 | 01:47:32,571 | 01:47:36,699 | You give old Joe Dirt lemonadeʼ he's gonna give you... Fuck you! | You give old Joe Dirt lemonadeʼ he's gonna give you... Fuck you! |
1840 | 01:47:37,993 | 01:47:39,410 | One more then l gotta go to lunch. | One more then l gotta go to lunch. |
1841 | 01:47:40,204 | 01:47:42,330 | Wait you're twisting stuff. Like l say somethingʼ | Wait you're twisting stuff. Like l say somethingʼ |
1842 | 01:47:42,414 | 01:47:43,540 | and then you say it back different. | and then you say it back different. |
1843 | 01:47:43,624 | 01:47:45,875 | You're supposed to be a nice guardian angel like... | You're supposed to be a nice guardian angel like... |
1844 | 01:47:46,085 | 01:47:47,710 | l don't picture people like you. | l don't picture people like you. |
1845 | 01:47:48,420 | 01:47:50,213 | -Anyway l don't get horny by... -Let's go. | -Anyway l don't get horny by... -Let's go. |
1846 | 01:47:52,007 | 01:47:53,675 | l don't get horny... l'm gonna get it out. | l don't get horny... l'm gonna get it out. |
1847 | 01:47:53,968 | 01:47:58,596 | l don't get horny from animal sex. But l like Jessica Rabbit. | l don't get horny from animal sex. But l like Jessica Rabbit. |
1848 | 01:47:59,348 | 01:48:01,057 | -Really? -She's fuckable yeah. | -Really? -She's fuckable yeah. |
1849 | 01:48:01,142 | 01:48:03,726 | -l kind of get a gay vibe from you. -Yeah l've heard that. | -l kind of get a gay vibe from you. -Yeah l've heard that. |
1850 | 01:48:06,897 | 01:48:08,356 | Can someone open this for me? | Can someone open this for me? |
1851 | 01:48:09,066 | 01:48:10,525 | Did somebody fart on this? | Did somebody fart on this? |
1852 | 01:48:11,402 | 01:48:12,402 | What did l do? | What did l do? |
1853 | 01:48:13,404 | 01:48:16,739 | What? Those two farts were accidents. Wait. No. What? | What? Those two farts were accidents. Wait. No. What? |
1854 | 01:48:18,659 | 01:48:19,826 | "Wait. No. What?" | "Wait. No. What?" |
1855 | 01:48:20,828 | 01:48:23,955 | What? l have a medical condition. They did it on purpose. | What? l have a medical condition. They did it on purpose. |
1856 | 01:48:27,585 | 01:48:29,460 | Fine. l don't even work here. | Fine. l don't even work here. |
1857 | 01:48:32,089 | 01:48:35,842 | Stuff you actually made up to sound cool because you were on shroomsʼ | Stuff you actually made up to sound cool because you were on shroomsʼ |
1858 | 01:48:35,926 | 01:48:38,303 | but actually makes you sound like a dipshit. | but actually makes you sound like a dipshit. |
1859 | 01:48:38,679 | 01:48:39,971 | So l'm gonna say no. | So l'm gonna say no. |
1860 | 01:48:40,472 | 01:48:44,434 | Hey, John. I'm up here at Load C. Some asshole went diarrhea all over the seat. | Hey, John. I'm up here at Load C. Some asshole went diarrhea all over the seat. |
1861 | 01:48:44,768 | 01:48:47,270 | Copy that. When can you start? | Copy that. When can you start? |
1862 | 01:48:51,525 | 01:48:53,109 | -Laugh like me. -Okay. | -Laugh like me. -Okay. |
1863 | 01:48:58,199 | 01:49:00,450 | -All right. -We're good? Okay. | -All right. -We're good? Okay. |
1864 | 01:49:04,955 | 01:49:08,291 | -That's it. Cut. -That's a cut. | -That's it. Cut. -That's a cut. |