# Start End Original Translated
1 00:00:03,000 00:00:04,200 [Cawing] [Cawing]
2 00:00:07,920 00:00:12,160 [Storyteller] When people told themselves their past with stories, [Storyteller] When people told themselves their past with stories,
3 00:00:12,200 00:00:14,520 explained their present with stories, explained their present with stories,
4 00:00:14,560 00:00:17,200 foretold the future with stories, foretold the future with stories,
5 00:00:18,720 00:00:22,280 the best place by the fire was kept for... the best place by the fire was kept for...
6 00:00:22,320 00:00:23,480 [Clinks] [Clinks]
7 00:00:23,520 00:00:25,120 The storyteller. The storyteller.
8 00:00:37,720 00:00:41,000 Yesterday, I was telling a marvelous tale Yesterday, I was telling a marvelous tale
9 00:00:41,040 00:00:44,000 of how the moon became round, of how the moon became round,
10 00:00:44,040 00:00:46,720 when suddenly, as I reached the best bit, when suddenly, as I reached the best bit,
11 00:00:46,760 00:00:49,160 I couldn't remember what came next. I couldn't remember what came next.
12 00:00:50,040 00:00:52,120 I still can't. I still can't.
13 00:00:52,160 00:00:55,040 And staring at these expectant faces, And staring at these expectant faces,
14 00:00:55,080 00:00:58,400 I thought, "what will I do when there are no more stories in me, I thought, "what will I do when there are no more stories in me,
15 00:00:58,440 00:01:00,400 "when the well runs dry? "when the well runs dry?
16 00:01:00,440 00:01:03,640 What use a storyteller without stories?" What use a storyteller without stories?"
17 00:01:04,920 00:01:07,520 And then I remembered a time And then I remembered a time
18 00:01:07,560 00:01:10,160 when that was exactly what happened. when that was exactly what happened.
19 00:01:24,800 00:01:29,480 Yes, yesterday I forgot a story. Yes, yesterday I forgot a story.
20 00:01:29,520 00:01:31,520 And that is why I went straight out And that is why I went straight out
21 00:01:31,560 00:01:33,400 and gave my supper to a beggar. and gave my supper to a beggar.
22 00:01:33,440 00:01:34,920 Our supper. Our supper.
23 00:01:34,960 00:01:38,040 Now, of course, this will strike fools as foolish Now, of course, this will strike fools as foolish
24 00:01:38,080 00:01:40,880 and wise men as wise. and wise men as wise.
25 00:01:40,920 00:01:45,320 A fool eats his last potato. A wise man plants it. A fool eats his last potato. A wise man plants it.
26 00:01:45,360 00:01:47,680 Apart from which, everyone knows Apart from which, everyone knows
27 00:01:47,720 00:01:50,000 beggars are never what they seem. beggars are never what they seem.
28 00:01:50,040 00:01:51,600 [Dog] Hmm, [Dog] Hmm,
29 00:01:51,640 00:01:54,960 you didn't plant a potato, you gave away our supper. you didn't plant a potato, you gave away our supper.
30 00:01:55,000 00:01:56,720 What was he if he wasn't a beggar? What was he if he wasn't a beggar?
31 00:01:56,760 00:01:58,720 He was definitely a beggar. He was definitely a beggar.
32 00:01:58,760 00:02:00,280 [Wind howling] [Wind howling]
33 00:02:01,440 00:02:03,720 There was a time, you see, There was a time, you see,
34 00:02:03,760 00:02:06,560 when I myself was forced to beg. when I myself was forced to beg.
35 00:02:07,680 00:02:10,960 A bad time, a bitter cold, A bad time, a bitter cold,
36 00:02:11,000 00:02:13,720 when a great hunger was on the land, when a great hunger was on the land,
37 00:02:13,760 00:02:16,280 and only the rich had bellies. and only the rich had bellies.
38 00:02:16,320 00:02:21,880 And I wandered, starving and wretched, and without a home, And I wandered, starving and wretched, and without a home,
39 00:02:21,920 00:02:25,720 until one morning I found myself in a new kingdom, until one morning I found myself in a new kingdom,
40 00:02:25,760 00:02:29,480 in sight of a palace and in smell of a kitchen, in sight of a palace and in smell of a kitchen,
41 00:02:29,520 00:02:33,360 drawn there by the sweet aroma of roasting. drawn there by the sweet aroma of roasting.
42 00:02:33,400 00:02:35,480 Mmm. Mmm.
43 00:02:35,520 00:02:37,800 And just about to knock was I, when-- And just about to knock was I, when--
44 00:02:37,840 00:02:39,920 [cook] Go on, get out! [cook] Go on, get out!
45 00:02:39,960 00:02:43,440 And stay out of my kitchen! And stay out of my kitchen!
46 00:02:43,480 00:02:45,040 [Dog barking] [Dog barking]
47 00:02:45,080 00:02:46,400 [Bell chiming] [Bell chiming]
48 00:02:46,440 00:02:48,000 [Storyteller] Good day to you. [Storyteller] Good day to you.
49 00:02:48,040 00:02:50,800 I've boiled men for wasting my time. I've boiled men for wasting my time.
50 00:02:50,840 00:02:53,480 Oh, I'm sure that's right. Good policy. Oh, I'm sure that's right. Good policy.
51 00:02:53,520 00:02:55,960 Do you have any spare water? Do you have any spare water?
52 00:02:56,000 00:02:57,320 What? What?
53 00:02:57,360 00:02:58,560 Oh, just a drop will do. Oh, just a drop will do.
54 00:02:58,600 00:03:03,240 I have a good stone here, I have a good stone here,
55 00:03:03,280 00:03:06,440 and with a little water, we'll make some soup for my friend and me. and with a little water, we'll make some soup for my friend and me.
56 00:03:06,480 00:03:08,040 Stone soup? Stone soup?
57 00:03:08,760 00:03:10,760 Mmm, delicious. Mmm, delicious.
58 00:03:11,640 00:03:12,840 Mmm. Mmm.
59 00:03:12,880 00:03:15,000 [Cook] I'm not a fool. [Cook] I'm not a fool.
60 00:03:15,040 00:03:18,760 You can't make soup out of a stone. You can't make soup out of a stone.
61 00:03:23,320 00:03:25,840 Here's your water. There's your fire. Here's your water. There's your fire.
62 00:03:25,880 00:03:28,280 Now let's see this marvelous soup. Now let's see this marvelous soup.
63 00:03:28,320 00:03:29,840 Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
64 00:03:38,080 00:03:39,800 How long is this going to take? How long is this going to take?
65 00:03:39,840 00:03:42,360 Oh, it won't take more than an hour. Oh, it won't take more than an hour.
66 00:03:42,400 00:03:47,120 That's good. Oh, it's marvelous water. That's good. Oh, it's marvelous water.
67 00:03:47,160 00:03:51,920 And our friend, the cook, stands over me for an hour while I consider my soup, And our friend, the cook, stands over me for an hour while I consider my soup,
68 00:03:51,960 00:03:54,880 a simple stone in bubbling water. a simple stone in bubbling water.
69 00:04:01,480 00:04:02,640 Well? Well?
70 00:04:02,680 00:04:05,600 Hmm, nearly there, I think, mmm. Hmm, nearly there, I think, mmm.
71 00:04:07,160 00:04:09,040 Mmm. Done. Mmm. Done.
72 00:04:09,080 00:04:10,640 Do you have a little salt? Do you have a little salt?
73 00:04:10,680 00:04:12,240 Salt! Salt!
74 00:04:14,640 00:04:15,720 Hmm. Hmm.
75 00:04:21,040 00:04:22,680 Mmm, almost perfect. Mmm, almost perfect.
76 00:04:22,720 00:04:23,640 [Sniffing] [Sniffing]
77 00:04:23,680 00:04:25,400 Do you have a little stock? Do you have a little stock?
78 00:04:25,440 00:04:27,280 Lamb. I mean, just a drop will do. Lamb. I mean, just a drop will do.
79 00:04:27,840 00:04:30,520 Stock! Stock!
80 00:04:30,560 00:04:33,840 [Storyteller] And after stock, Greens. [Storyteller] And after stock, Greens.
81 00:04:33,880 00:04:38,120 And after Greens, potatoes. In they all go. And after Greens, potatoes. In they all go.
82 00:04:39,560 00:04:40,520 Meat? Meat?
83 00:04:44,360 00:04:46,680 Enough! You'll drown the stone. Enough! You'll drown the stone.
84 00:04:48,960 00:04:51,320 Hmm, ready! Hmm, ready!
85 00:04:51,360 00:04:55,320 Now, you must remember this is just a humble stone soup. Now, you must remember this is just a humble stone soup.
86 00:04:57,280 00:04:58,400 Ah! Ah!
87 00:04:59,160 00:05:02,000 Good. Very good. Good. Very good.
88 00:05:02,040 00:05:04,680 Soup from a stone! Soup from a stone!
89 00:05:05,360 00:05:07,440 Keep it. It's my gift. Keep it. It's my gift.
90 00:05:07,480 00:05:08,800 Thank you. Thank you.
91 00:05:08,840 00:05:10,480 [Guffawing] [Guffawing]
92 00:05:11,600 00:05:13,520 [Screaming] [Screaming]
93 00:05:15,440 00:05:18,200 [All laughing] [All laughing]
94 00:05:18,240 00:05:21,000 [Storyteller] A furious cook drags me before the king. [Storyteller] A furious cook drags me before the king.
95 00:05:21,040 00:05:23,960 "Punishment!" he rages. "Death by boiling." "Punishment!" he rages. "Death by boiling."
96 00:05:24,000 00:05:28,960 But all I'm listening to are the sweet gurgles of my full belly. But all I'm listening to are the sweet gurgles of my full belly.
97 00:05:29,000 00:05:30,840 Answer his majesty, blockhead. Answer his majesty, blockhead.
98 00:05:30,880 00:05:32,080 Pardon? Pardon?
99 00:05:32,840 00:05:34,800 What's your trade, fool? What's your trade, fool?
100 00:05:34,840 00:05:37,000 It can be scratched on your gravestone. It can be scratched on your gravestone.
101 00:05:38,440 00:05:40,320 I am a teller of stories, I am a teller of stories,
102 00:05:41,240 00:05:43,800 a Weaver of dreams. a Weaver of dreams.
103 00:05:43,840 00:05:47,680 I can dance, sing, and in the right weather, I can stand on my head. I can dance, sing, and in the right weather, I can stand on my head.
104 00:05:47,720 00:05:51,400 I know 7 words of Latin. I have a little magic-- I know 7 words of Latin. I have a little magic--
105 00:05:55,440 00:05:57,640 and a trick or 2. and a trick or 2.
106 00:05:57,680 00:05:59,760 I know the proper way to meet a dragon. I know the proper way to meet a dragon.
107 00:05:59,800 00:06:02,160 I can fight dirty, but not fair. I can fight dirty, but not fair.
108 00:06:02,200 00:06:04,600 I once swallowed 30 oysters in a minute. I once swallowed 30 oysters in a minute.
109 00:06:04,640 00:06:07,720 I am not domestic. I am a luxury, I am not domestic. I am a luxury,
110 00:06:07,760 00:06:10,640 and in that sense, necessary. and in that sense, necessary.
111 00:06:17,200 00:06:19,200 [Laughing] [Laughing]
112 00:06:19,240 00:06:20,760 [All laughing] [All laughing]
113 00:06:23,360 00:06:27,080 Excellent! And you can make soup out of a stone! Excellent! And you can make soup out of a stone!
114 00:06:27,120 00:06:30,000 Excellent. And a monkey out of a cook! Excellent. And a monkey out of a cook!
115 00:06:30,040 00:06:31,400 But, your majesty-- But, your majesty--
116 00:06:31,440 00:06:34,400 stories, eh? Good stories? Funny stories? stories, eh? Good stories? Funny stories?
117 00:06:34,440 00:06:37,400 Some good, some funny, some indifferent. Some good, some funny, some indifferent.
118 00:06:37,440 00:06:40,120 Your highness, the punishment. Your highness, the punishment.
119 00:06:40,760 00:06:41,760 Punishment. Punishment.
120 00:06:42,400 00:06:44,600 Yes. Yes.
121 00:06:44,640 00:06:48,320 Your punishment will be that you will tell me a story Your punishment will be that you will tell me a story
122 00:06:48,360 00:06:50,800 every night for a year. every night for a year.
123 00:06:50,840 00:06:54,480 And for every story, I will give you a golden crown. Is that fair? And for every story, I will give you a golden crown. Is that fair?
124 00:06:55,040 00:06:56,840 It's my usual fee. It's my usual fee.
125 00:06:56,880 00:06:59,760 But of course, if you should run out of stories, But of course, if you should run out of stories,
126 00:06:59,800 00:07:02,880 I will hand you over to the cook and his boiling oil, I will hand you over to the cook and his boiling oil,
127 00:07:02,920 00:07:04,800 naturally. naturally.
128 00:07:04,840 00:07:05,920 Naturally. Naturally.
129 00:07:10,000 00:07:14,920 Ah, my dearie-ohs, the balmy days which followed! Ah, my dearie-ohs, the balmy days which followed!
130 00:07:14,960 00:07:17,400 The plenty! Much of this, much of that. The plenty! Much of this, much of that.
131 00:07:17,440 00:07:20,720 Each day an inch on my belly, a story from my head. Each day an inch on my belly, a story from my head.
132 00:07:21,480 00:07:24,280 Imagine me then, Imagine me then,
133 00:07:24,320 00:07:27,680 a royal commission, a servant, a feather bed, a royal commission, a servant, a feather bed,
134 00:07:27,720 00:07:31,040 a suit of silk jingling with my gold pieces. a suit of silk jingling with my gold pieces.
135 00:07:31,080 00:07:33,520 [Sighs] Blissfulness. [Sighs] Blissfulness.
136 00:07:34,400 00:07:37,280 After supper, up by the fire, After supper, up by the fire,
137 00:07:37,320 00:07:39,440 I'd tell my tale to the rapt king. I'd tell my tale to the rapt king.
138 00:07:40,240 00:07:42,240 And he never fell asleep. And he never fell asleep.
139 00:07:44,720 00:07:47,480 What more could an artist want? Food to eat, What more could an artist want? Food to eat,
140 00:07:47,520 00:07:50,160 money to spend, and his audience awake. money to spend, and his audience awake.
141 00:07:50,200 00:07:52,480 Each night a tick on the golden calendar, Each night a tick on the golden calendar,
142 00:07:52,520 00:07:54,800 and a snuggle with my new wife. and a snuggle with my new wife.
143 00:07:56,200 00:07:59,040 Oh, that wife, aye-ya! Oh, that wife, aye-ya!
144 00:08:00,240 00:08:03,720 And a year passed, and the final day came. And a year passed, and the final day came.
145 00:08:03,760 00:08:07,040 My last of sweet punishment. My last of sweet punishment.
146 00:08:07,080 00:08:08,920 [Sighs deeply] [Sighs deeply]
147 00:08:08,960 00:08:12,000 I wake up, full to the brim with life. I wake up, full to the brim with life.
148 00:08:12,040 00:08:14,760 My wife, all softness in our bed, My wife, all softness in our bed,
149 00:08:14,800 00:08:18,800 the coins spilling over, and blow me, the coins spilling over, and blow me,
150 00:08:18,840 00:08:21,200 I can't think of a story! I can't think of a story!
151 00:08:21,240 00:08:23,840 In a twink, I'm up and pacing the gardens, In a twink, I'm up and pacing the gardens,
152 00:08:23,880 00:08:28,320 that old crocodile fear leading me a merry dance. that old crocodile fear leading me a merry dance.
153 00:08:28,360 00:08:32,800 But, oh, dear! My mind is a terrible blank. But, oh, dear! My mind is a terrible blank.
154 00:08:32,840 00:08:36,840 Oil, it says, the oil is on the boil. Oil, it says, the oil is on the boil.
155 00:08:38,000 00:08:40,080 Husband, we have a visitor. Husband, we have a visitor.
156 00:08:40,920 00:08:42,400 So I see. So I see.
157 00:08:42,440 00:08:46,160 You don't remember me? We shared your stone soup. You don't remember me? We shared your stone soup.
158 00:08:46,200 00:08:47,240 Right. Right.
159 00:08:47,280 00:08:48,760 [Wife] Is something wrong? [Wife] Is something wrong?
160 00:08:48,800 00:08:50,640 No, no. No, no.
161 00:08:52,440 00:08:54,640 [Storyteller] Is there anything we can do for you? [Storyteller] Is there anything we can do for you?
162 00:08:54,680 00:08:56,680 Is it food you're after, or money? Is it food you're after, or money?
163 00:08:56,720 00:08:58,960 Oh, no, sir. I have both about me. Oh, no, sir. I have both about me.
164 00:08:59,000 00:09:03,200 As it happens, I have 364 gold pieces. As it happens, I have 364 gold pieces.
165 00:09:03,240 00:09:06,400 Aye, and I come to wager them against yours. Aye, and I come to wager them against yours.
166 00:09:06,440 00:09:09,200 My husband, sir, is a devil with the dice. My husband, sir, is a devil with the dice.
167 00:09:09,240 00:09:12,560 Yes, of course, I am. But I can't be winning money. Yes, of course, I am. But I can't be winning money.
168 00:09:12,600 00:09:14,640 I am playing for higher stakes. I am playing for higher stakes.
169 00:09:14,680 00:09:17,640 I must find a story before nightfall, else I shall... I must find a story before nightfall, else I shall...
170 00:09:21,600 00:09:25,640 I know I shouldn't have, but the gold sparkled. I know I shouldn't have, but the gold sparkled.
171 00:09:25,680 00:09:29,560 I should have said no, but the gold glittered. I should have said no, but the gold glittered.
172 00:09:29,600 00:09:32,560 The morning fritted away my fortune with it. The morning fritted away my fortune with it.
173 00:09:34,560 00:09:37,560 Well, that's it. I have no story, and I have no money. Well, that's it. I have no story, and I have no money.
174 00:09:38,040 00:09:39,000 Play on. Play on.
175 00:09:39,040 00:09:40,200 With what? With what?
176 00:09:40,240 00:09:43,320 Your wife. Your wife against my winnings. Your wife. Your wife against my winnings.
177 00:09:43,840 00:09:44,800 Never! Never!
178 00:09:44,840 00:09:46,920 No! Go on. Play! No! Go on. Play!
179 00:09:48,000 00:09:49,760 I'm sure you'll win. I'm sure you'll win.
180 00:09:49,800 00:09:52,120 I'll not. I'll not give you up. I'll not. I'll not give you up.
181 00:09:52,160 00:09:55,480 I may forget stories, I may lose my fortune, I may boil, I may forget stories, I may lose my fortune, I may boil,
182 00:09:55,520 00:09:57,360 but I'll not lose you. but I'll not lose you.
183 00:09:57,400 00:10:00,880 Play. You must surely win. Play. You must surely win.
184 00:10:04,160 00:10:05,720 'Tis not my will. 'Tis not my will.
185 00:10:06,440 00:10:07,880 [Dice rattling] [Dice rattling]
186 00:10:10,040 00:10:11,320 2. 2.
187 00:10:13,520 00:10:15,280 What's this? What's this?
188 00:10:15,320 00:10:19,920 He is now my husband, sir, and I needs must love him. He is now my husband, sir, and I needs must love him.
189 00:10:19,960 00:10:21,120 Then I am broken. Then I am broken.
190 00:10:21,880 00:10:23,800 You will not play again? You will not play again?
191 00:10:23,840 00:10:26,200 With what? There is nothing more. With what? There is nothing more.
192 00:10:26,880 00:10:28,920 I'll stake everything now, I'll stake everything now,
193 00:10:28,960 00:10:30,480 wife, everything, wife, everything,
194 00:10:31,360 00:10:33,040 against your own self. against your own self.
195 00:10:34,080 00:10:35,480 3rd time lucky? 3rd time lucky?
196 00:10:36,240 00:10:37,680 Stake myself? Stake myself?
197 00:10:39,360 00:10:40,640 Why not? Why not?
198 00:10:40,680 00:10:42,200 You have it already anyway. You have it already anyway.
199 00:10:53,400 00:10:56,520 2 sixes. Naturally. 2 sixes. Naturally.
200 00:10:56,560 00:10:59,840 Well, sir, I am your servant on this dismal day. Well, sir, I am your servant on this dismal day.
201 00:11:01,320 00:11:03,480 Am I to be tied up like a dog? Am I to be tied up like a dog?
202 00:11:03,520 00:11:06,000 No, like a hare. No, like a hare.
203 00:11:13,720 00:11:16,240 [Wife] Oh, how clever! [Wife] Oh, how clever!
204 00:11:16,280 00:11:19,200 [Squealing] [Storyteller] Help! Help! I'm shouting. [Squealing] [Storyteller] Help! Help! I'm shouting.
205 00:11:19,240 00:11:20,960 But no noise comes out. But no noise comes out.
206 00:11:21,000 00:11:23,560 Only a squeal, a squeal only! Only a squeal, a squeal only!
207 00:11:23,600 00:11:27,280 Darling wife, help me! Darling wife, help me!
208 00:11:27,320 00:11:29,120 No, it's no good struggling. No, it's no good struggling.
209 00:11:29,160 00:11:31,360 You can't get away, you naughty boy. You can't get away, you naughty boy.
210 00:11:31,400 00:11:32,880 You can't get away. You can't get away.
211 00:11:33,600 00:11:35,680 [Squealing] [Squealing]
212 00:11:35,720 00:11:37,360 Do you like our games? Do you like our games?
213 00:11:37,400 00:11:41,160 No, I don't. Help! No, I don't. Help!
214 00:11:41,200 00:11:42,760 Loving every minute. Loving every minute.
215 00:11:42,800 00:11:44,960 [Laughing] Good. [Laughing] Good.
216 00:11:45,000 00:11:47,880 Because I have better sport in store. Because I have better sport in store.
217 00:11:47,920 00:11:50,680 But not in that shape. But not in that shape.
218 00:11:51,840 00:11:52,800 I wonder... I wonder...
219 00:11:52,840 00:11:56,000 Don't wonder. Help me! Don't wonder. Help me!
220 00:11:56,040 00:11:57,680 You choose, madam. You choose, madam.
221 00:11:57,720 00:11:58,840 Can you do anything? Can you do anything?
222 00:11:58,880 00:12:02,600 Anything. But it must be small for my purposes. Anything. But it must be small for my purposes.
223 00:12:02,640 00:12:04,640 Um... Um...
224 00:12:04,680 00:12:05,640 A flea? A flea?
225 00:12:05,680 00:12:06,680 [Squealing] [Squealing]
226 00:12:06,720 00:12:07,840 [Beggar] A flea is possible. [Beggar] A flea is possible.
227 00:12:07,880 00:12:09,080 [Wife giggling] [Wife giggling]
228 00:12:09,120 00:12:10,480 [Squealing] [Squealing]
229 00:12:12,800 00:12:15,600 Nice. I can be popped between the fingers. Nice. I can be popped between the fingers.
230 00:12:17,400 00:12:18,920 [Slurping] [Slurping]
231 00:12:18,960 00:12:20,240 Thank you. Thank you.
232 00:12:22,520 00:12:24,800 If you itch, you can think of me. If you itch, you can think of me.
233 00:12:26,240 00:12:30,720 The beggar strides off. Where he carries me, I know not. The beggar strides off. Where he carries me, I know not.
234 00:12:30,760 00:12:33,800 This morning, a man blessed; By lunch, a flea. This morning, a man blessed; By lunch, a flea.
235 00:12:33,840 00:12:36,560 This does not bode well for the evening. This does not bode well for the evening.
236 00:12:36,600 00:12:38,880 Unless I find my story, Unless I find my story,
237 00:12:38,920 00:12:40,400 it's a boil... it's a boil...
238 00:12:40,440 00:12:42,040 In the oil. In the oil.
239 00:12:47,240 00:12:50,400 You get a view on life as a flea. You get a view on life as a flea.
240 00:12:50,440 00:12:53,320 Outside, it is cold and hungry, Outside, it is cold and hungry,
241 00:12:53,360 00:12:56,480 inside the castle, it is hot and people eat. inside the castle, it is hot and people eat.
242 00:12:58,240 00:13:00,680 Our friend, the beggar, takes us, Our friend, the beggar, takes us,
243 00:13:00,720 00:13:03,600 me and the rest of the fleas, to the kitchen me and the rest of the fleas, to the kitchen
244 00:13:03,640 00:13:07,200 where the oil sizzles, to meet the cook. where the oil sizzles, to meet the cook.
245 00:13:07,240 00:13:11,320 The human body is a kitchen for the parasite. The human body is a kitchen for the parasite.
246 00:13:11,360 00:13:13,600 And the cook is a feast. And the cook is a feast.
247 00:13:13,640 00:13:15,280 The other fleas flock to him. The other fleas flock to him.
248 00:13:16,240 00:13:19,600 Gold, mmm, so tempting. Gold, mmm, so tempting.
249 00:13:19,640 00:13:23,040 Greed is the cook's itch, and he scratches. Greed is the cook's itch, and he scratches.
250 00:13:23,080 00:13:24,040 What's that? What's that?
251 00:13:24,080 00:13:26,880 Oh, that's oil boiling. Oh, that's oil boiling.
252 00:13:26,920 00:13:28,480 It's for a friend of mine, It's for a friend of mine,
253 00:13:28,520 00:13:33,160 a buffoon who tells stories, a nothing, a flea. a buffoon who tells stories, a nothing, a flea.
254 00:13:33,200 00:13:36,920 His time will come. Put your straws down here. His time will come. Put your straws down here.
255 00:13:36,960 00:13:38,000 By all means. By all means.
256 00:13:39,240 00:13:42,240 Now, you say you can blow away the middle one, Now, you say you can blow away the middle one,
257 00:13:42,280 00:13:45,200 but leave the other 2 where they are. but leave the other 2 where they are.
258 00:13:45,240 00:13:48,560 My gold says I can, a meal says I can't. My gold says I can, a meal says I can't.
259 00:13:51,160 00:13:52,320 [Blowing] [Blowing]
260 00:13:52,360 00:13:53,400 That's cheating. That's cheating.
261 00:13:53,440 00:13:54,400 Why? Why?
262 00:13:54,440 00:13:55,640 I can do that. I can do that.
263 00:13:55,680 00:13:56,600 Then try. Then try.
264 00:14:05,680 00:14:06,960 [Blowing] [Blowing]
265 00:14:08,840 00:14:11,000 My fingers! My fingers!
266 00:14:11,040 00:14:13,760 It's not so easy. Another game? It's not so easy. Another game?
267 00:14:13,800 00:14:18,360 My--my fingers. Oh, my fingers! My--my fingers. Oh, my fingers!
268 00:14:18,400 00:14:19,560 This is simpler. This is simpler.
269 00:14:20,560 00:14:22,240 I'll wager my gold I'll wager my gold
270 00:14:22,280 00:14:25,080 that I can move one ear, but not the other. that I can move one ear, but not the other.
271 00:14:25,120 00:14:28,280 That's impossible. But I'll not try. That's impossible. But I'll not try.
272 00:14:28,320 00:14:31,080 Fetch a doctor! Fetch needle and thread. Fetch a doctor! Fetch needle and thread.
273 00:14:31,120 00:14:32,120 As you wish. As you wish.
274 00:14:32,760 00:14:34,280 [Cook] No, try. [Cook] No, try.
275 00:14:35,960 00:14:39,320 I want that gold. I want that gold.
276 00:14:39,360 00:14:42,880 Try, and curse you. Try, and curse you.
277 00:14:47,520 00:14:50,160 That's cheating. He's cheating. That's cheating. He's cheating.
278 00:14:50,200 00:14:53,600 No, I said, I'd move one ear and not the other, No, I said, I'd move one ear and not the other,
279 00:14:53,640 00:14:55,400 and that is what I've done. and that is what I've done.
280 00:14:55,440 00:14:57,520 You'll not make a fool out of me. You'll not make a fool out of me.
281 00:14:57,560 00:14:59,520 I'll do it myself. I'll do it myself.
282 00:14:59,560 00:15:01,560 [Laughing] [Laughing]
283 00:15:02,640 00:15:03,680 My ear! My ear!
284 00:15:04,840 00:15:07,800 Oh, my ear! Oh, my ear!
285 00:15:07,840 00:15:11,520 Oh, my--my fingers! Oh, my--my fingers!
286 00:15:11,560 00:15:13,000 My ear! My ear!
287 00:15:13,040 00:15:14,520 Poor chap. Poor chap.
288 00:15:14,560 00:15:18,680 What do you mean, "poor chap"? What about me? Poor flea! What do you mean, "poor chap"? What about me? Poor flea!
289 00:15:18,720 00:15:21,400 Poor chap, indeed! He only lost a few bits. Poor chap, indeed! He only lost a few bits.
290 00:15:21,440 00:15:24,200 I lost everything. Terrible state. I lost everything. Terrible state.
291 00:15:24,840 00:15:26,800 Sorry. Sorry.
292 00:15:26,840 00:15:29,320 And then, as night draws up its hood And then, as night draws up its hood
293 00:15:29,360 00:15:32,080 and the hour comes when the king expects his story, and the hour comes when the king expects his story,
294 00:15:32,120 00:15:36,720 I find myself carried into the court on the coat of the beggar. I find myself carried into the court on the coat of the beggar.
295 00:15:36,760 00:15:38,680 Where's my storyteller? Where's my storyteller?
296 00:15:38,720 00:15:41,880 Eh? Eh? I want my story! Eh? Eh? I want my story!
297 00:15:41,920 00:15:45,440 Sire, there is a man outside, would entertain you. Sire, there is a man outside, would entertain you.
298 00:15:45,480 00:15:48,160 I don't want entertainers. I loathe entertainers. I don't want entertainers. I loathe entertainers.
299 00:15:48,200 00:15:50,480 I want my story and I want it now. I want my story and I want it now.
300 00:15:50,520 00:15:54,480 Majesty, allow me to present myself, ragbag that I am. Majesty, allow me to present myself, ragbag that I am.
301 00:15:54,520 00:15:56,240 He smells. He smells.
302 00:15:56,280 00:16:00,400 I am a beggar, sir. It is my business to smell. I am a beggar, sir. It is my business to smell.
303 00:16:00,440 00:16:05,000 But I am capable of offence not simply to the nose. But I am capable of offence not simply to the nose.
304 00:16:05,040 00:16:08,480 And I can throw a rope in a special way. And I can throw a rope in a special way.
305 00:16:11,600 00:16:12,600 [Gasping] [Gasping]
306 00:16:13,160 00:16:14,280 That's clever. That's clever.
307 00:16:14,320 00:16:16,800 Do something else. Can he do anything else? Do something else. Can he do anything else?
308 00:16:16,840 00:16:17,880 [Beggar] I can. [Beggar] I can.
309 00:16:35,240 00:16:38,880 Where's it gone? I want it. Where's it gone? Where's it gone? I want it. Where's it gone?
310 00:16:38,920 00:16:41,640 The prince wants the ball. Please oblige. The prince wants the ball. Please oblige.
311 00:16:41,680 00:16:43,040 It's at the top of the rope. It's at the top of the rope.
312 00:16:43,080 00:16:44,560 Can I get it? Can I get it?
313 00:16:44,600 00:16:45,920 He can't climb a rope. He can't climb a rope.
314 00:16:46,560 00:16:47,840 Well, in that case... Well, in that case...
315 00:16:54,560 00:16:56,040 [Beggar] Now he can go up. [Beggar] Now he can go up.
316 00:17:03,240 00:17:04,200 Be careful. Be careful.
317 00:17:09,440 00:17:12,000 What's he doing up there? Come down! What's he doing up there? Come down!
318 00:17:12,040 00:17:13,400 Come down! Come down!
319 00:17:18,560 00:17:19,680 [Dog] Where was he? [Dog] Where was he?
320 00:17:20,840 00:17:23,480 Where was he indeed? Where was he indeed?
321 00:17:23,520 00:17:25,440 All eyes strain upwards, All eyes strain upwards,
322 00:17:25,480 00:17:27,800 but the prince has vanished. but the prince has vanished.
323 00:17:27,840 00:17:30,400 The beggar scratches his beard and shrugs, The beggar scratches his beard and shrugs,
324 00:17:30,440 00:17:33,040 and then a bright object comes sailing down. and then a bright object comes sailing down.
325 00:17:34,240 00:17:35,440 The ball! The ball!
326 00:17:40,440 00:17:42,160 The room is silent. The room is silent.
327 00:17:42,200 00:17:43,320 Nothing. Nothing.
328 00:17:43,360 00:17:45,400 Then a babble of muttering and whispering, Then a babble of muttering and whispering,
329 00:17:45,440 00:17:47,560 pointing, glares, and indignation, pointing, glares, and indignation,
330 00:17:47,600 00:17:51,240 growls drowned by the terrifying roar of the king. growls drowned by the terrifying roar of the king.
331 00:17:51,280 00:17:53,440 To the oil! To the oil!
332 00:17:53,480 00:17:57,320 [Storyteller] Oh, no! I'm trying to shout for help, but no one hears me. [Storyteller] Oh, no! I'm trying to shout for help, but no one hears me.
333 00:17:57,360 00:17:59,800 To go like this? A flea, a nothing. To go like this? A flea, a nothing.
334 00:17:59,840 00:18:01,960 To sizzle. No! To sizzle. No!
335 00:18:02,000 00:18:04,920 [King] To the oil! To the oil! [King] To the oil! To the oil!
336 00:18:04,960 00:18:07,480 Here you are, rat bag. Here you are, rat bag.
337 00:18:08,640 00:18:11,800 Come to the pot, the terrible hot, Come to the pot, the terrible hot,
338 00:18:11,840 00:18:16,160 come for a boil in the boiling oil. come for a boil in the boiling oil.
339 00:18:16,200 00:18:18,000 [Laughing] [Laughing]
340 00:18:18,040 00:18:22,080 Up and in! Up and in!
341 00:18:23,600 00:18:24,680 [Laughing] [Laughing]
342 00:18:25,520 00:18:26,640 [Screaming] [Screaming]
343 00:18:29,480 00:18:30,840 [Laughing] [Laughing]
344 00:18:33,200 00:18:34,200 [Storyteller] Watch out! [Storyteller] Watch out!
345 00:18:34,240 00:18:35,640 Sorry. Sorry.
346 00:18:35,680 00:18:37,400 This isn't right. This isn't right.
347 00:18:37,440 00:18:39,000 That's not meant to happen. That's not meant to happen.
348 00:18:39,040 00:18:40,720 It's boiling. It's boiling.
349 00:18:41,640 00:18:42,920 [Groaning] [Groaning]
350 00:18:43,880 00:18:45,240 [Moaning] [Moaning]
351 00:18:46,640 00:18:47,880 [Sobbing] [Sobbing]
352 00:18:51,000 00:18:52,520 My fingers! My fingers!
353 00:18:52,560 00:18:55,560 They're back! My fingers are back! They're back! My fingers are back!
354 00:18:55,600 00:18:57,320 Ow! Ow!
355 00:18:57,360 00:19:01,040 My ear. It's back. My ear is back! My ear. It's back. My ear is back!
356 00:19:05,320 00:19:08,400 Where's the ball? What have you done with my ball? Give it back! Where's the ball? What have you done with my ball? Give it back!
357 00:19:08,440 00:19:09,400 [Cook] Ow! [Cook] Ow!
358 00:19:09,440 00:19:10,520 [Soldier] Look! [Soldier] Look!
359 00:19:11,760 00:19:15,560 "Hmm," they pondered, and who could blame them, "Hmm," they pondered, and who could blame them,
360 00:19:15,600 00:19:18,560 for odds, bods, and strange indeedie, for odds, bods, and strange indeedie,
361 00:19:18,600 00:19:21,360 the beggar had quite disappeared. the beggar had quite disappeared.
362 00:19:21,400 00:19:24,600 But--but what about you? Where were you? But--but what about you? Where were you?
363 00:19:24,640 00:19:28,400 Where was I indeed? No longer a flea. No longer anything. Where was I indeed? No longer a flea. No longer anything.
364 00:19:28,440 00:19:32,640 Here I am above the palace, swirling, an element, nothing more. Here I am above the palace, swirling, an element, nothing more.
365 00:19:32,680 00:19:35,400 And then a sudden drop, hurtling down, And then a sudden drop, hurtling down,
366 00:19:35,440 00:19:38,000 and the ground rushing up towards me-- and the ground rushing up towards me--
367 00:19:38,040 00:19:39,360 [groaning] [groaning]
368 00:19:40,360 00:19:42,760 [Coins tinkling] [Coins tinkling]
369 00:19:42,800 00:19:45,600 I've been dreaming. None of this happened. I've been dreaming. None of this happened.
370 00:19:46,520 00:19:48,120 His majesty wants his story. His majesty wants his story.
371 00:19:48,840 00:19:49,760 Yes. Yes.
372 00:19:50,600 00:19:51,520 Wife? Wife?
373 00:19:53,360 00:19:54,480 Right. Right.
374 00:20:02,360 00:20:04,160 [Storyteller panting] [Storyteller panting]
375 00:20:04,200 00:20:07,880 The day is almost over, and I've heard no story. The day is almost over, and I've heard no story.
376 00:20:08,440 00:20:10,000 Sire. Sire.
377 00:20:10,040 00:20:11,680 You remember the conditions? You remember the conditions?
378 00:20:11,720 00:20:13,160 I do. I do.
379 00:20:13,200 00:20:16,720 Well, do you have a story to tell me or not? Well, do you have a story to tell me or not?
380 00:20:16,760 00:20:20,600 He hasn't sire, the pig. Let me have him! He hasn't sire, the pig. Let me have him!
381 00:20:20,640 00:20:22,200 Is there going to be a boil? Is there going to be a boil?
382 00:20:23,040 00:20:24,200 [Snickering] [Snickering]
383 00:20:26,120 00:20:28,320 I have no story, sire. I have no story, sire.
384 00:20:31,080 00:20:33,880 Let me tell you what happened to me today. Let me tell you what happened to me today.
385 00:20:35,200 00:20:36,600 I woke up. I woke up.
386 00:20:36,640 00:20:39,000 It was the last day of our agreement. It was the last day of our agreement.
387 00:20:39,040 00:20:44,200 My wife lay beside me, the sun streaming in, never was a man so happy. My wife lay beside me, the sun streaming in, never was a man so happy.
388 00:20:44,240 00:20:48,480 And then, I just couldn't think of a story. And then, I just couldn't think of a story.
389 00:20:49,240 00:20:50,400 Not a single one. Not a single one.
390 00:20:50,440 00:20:52,880 So I went out into the gardens, So I went out into the gardens,
391 00:20:52,920 00:20:56,160 and then things began to go very wrong. and then things began to go very wrong.
392 00:20:56,200 00:20:58,440 [Storyteller] And so I began to tell the king [Storyteller] And so I began to tell the king
393 00:20:58,480 00:21:00,200 of my adventures, of my adventures,
394 00:21:00,240 00:21:03,200 of hares and fleas and mysteries, of hares and fleas and mysteries,
395 00:21:03,240 00:21:06,400 the worst day of my life, my wife's cruelty, the worst day of my life, my wife's cruelty,
396 00:21:06,440 00:21:08,080 the boiling oil. the boiling oil.
397 00:21:08,120 00:21:11,160 And what a tale it was, my dearies. And what a tale it was, my dearies.
398 00:21:11,200 00:21:15,200 How the tears coursed down the cheeks of the king, How the tears coursed down the cheeks of the king,
399 00:21:15,240 00:21:18,200 and the cook and the queen, and the cook and the queen,
400 00:21:18,240 00:21:23,240 and when at last I finished, there was a terrible silence. and when at last I finished, there was a terrible silence.
401 00:21:23,280 00:21:26,760 And so, majesty, I have no story to tell. And so, majesty, I have no story to tell.
402 00:21:28,760 00:21:31,760 But that's the best story I ever heard. But that's the best story I ever heard.
403 00:21:31,800 00:21:33,080 [Sobbing] [Sobbing]
404 00:21:33,960 00:21:35,000 And me. And me.
405 00:21:35,040 00:21:36,280 [Crying] [Crying]
406 00:21:41,680 00:21:44,920 And suddenly, the whole court stood and cheered And suddenly, the whole court stood and cheered
407 00:21:44,960 00:21:48,320 and clapped my back and made me say again, from start to finish, and clapped my back and made me say again, from start to finish,
408 00:21:48,360 00:21:51,080 the best story they'd ever heard. the best story they'd ever heard.
409 00:21:51,120 00:21:53,720 And then, I understood what the beggar had done: And then, I understood what the beggar had done:
410 00:21:54,880 00:21:57,200 He'd given me a story. He'd given me a story.
411 00:21:57,240 00:22:00,880 When I was a story short, he made me one. When I was a story short, he made me one.
412 00:22:04,800 00:22:07,200 And--and your wife? And--and your wife?
413 00:22:07,240 00:22:09,520 Oh, she was under the beggar's spell. Oh, she was under the beggar's spell.
414 00:22:09,560 00:22:11,200 Ah! I thought so. Ah! I thought so.
415 00:22:11,240 00:22:13,040 Otherwise, it would have been cruel Otherwise, it would have been cruel
416 00:22:13,080 00:22:16,400 to kiss the beggar, to make you into a flea. to kiss the beggar, to make you into a flea.
417 00:22:17,480 00:22:19,480 She was enchanted. Definite. She was enchanted. Definite.
418 00:22:20,240 00:22:22,240 And still is, I suppose. And still is, I suppose.
419 00:22:22,280 00:22:25,560 She was so taken by his magic, she set off in search of him. She was so taken by his magic, she set off in search of him.
420 00:22:26,640 00:22:29,080 I never saw her to this day. I never saw her to this day.
421 00:22:29,120 00:22:34,320 As for the cook, he threw out the pot of oil and kept the stone instead. As for the cook, he threw out the pot of oil and kept the stone instead.
422 00:22:34,360 00:22:36,600 Whenever a poor unfortunate came a-begging, Whenever a poor unfortunate came a-begging,
423 00:22:36,640 00:22:40,200 he would make them the most delicious soup. he would make them the most delicious soup.
424 00:22:40,240 00:22:43,280 So that's how a story was lost and then found, So that's how a story was lost and then found,
425 00:22:44,120 00:22:45,600 and is still told to this day, and is still told to this day,
426 00:22:45,640 00:22:47,600 for the king will hear no other. for the king will hear no other.
427 00:22:47,640 00:22:51,280 Only it's changed now. The wife comes back to the storyteller. Only it's changed now. The wife comes back to the storyteller.
428 00:22:51,320 00:22:54,480 The storyteller becomes king. You know how it is in stories. The storyteller becomes king. You know how it is in stories.
429 00:22:55,640 00:22:57,480 She was a lovely. She was a lovely.
430 00:22:57,520 00:23:00,120 Lovely red hair. Lovely red hair.
431 00:23:00,160 00:23:01,240 Ah. Ah.
432 00:23:02,680 00:23:05,760 Are you hungry? I've got a bone somewhere. Are you hungry? I've got a bone somewhere.
433 00:23:08,120 00:23:09,240 [Sighs] [Sighs]
434 00:23:11,200 00:23:13,000 Not much use. Not much use.
435 00:23:13,040 00:23:15,240 We can make a soup. We can make a soup.
436 00:23:15,280 00:23:16,600 We can try. We can try.