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1 00:00:39,039 00:00:41,209 CHRIS WALLACE: Good evening. I welcome you to the third CHRIS WALLACE: Good evening. I welcome you to the third
2 00:00:41,242 00:00:43,577 and final of the 2016 presidential debates. and final of the 2016 presidential debates.
3 00:00:43,611 00:00:46,046 DONALD TRUMP: We either have a country, or we don't. DONALD TRUMP: We either have a country, or we don't.
4 00:00:46,080 00:00:47,615 HILLARY CLINTON: Rounding up people who are undocumented... HILLARY CLINTON: Rounding up people who are undocumented...
5 00:00:47,648 00:00:49,117 TRUMP: We have some bad hombres here. TRUMP: We have some bad hombres here.
6 00:00:49,150 00:00:50,851 CLINTON: ...is an idea that is not in keeping CLINTON: ...is an idea that is not in keeping
7 00:00:50,884 00:00:52,786 -with who we are as a nation. -TRUMP: I tell it like it is. -with who we are as a nation. -TRUMP: I tell it like it is.
8 00:00:52,820 00:00:54,588 CLINTON: I'm happy to compare my 30 years of experience... CLINTON: I'm happy to compare my 30 years of experience...
9 00:00:54,622 00:00:55,856 TRUMP: The one thing you have TRUMP: The one thing you have
10 00:00:55,889 00:00:57,691 over me is experience, but it's bad experience. over me is experience, but it's bad experience.
11 00:00:57,725 00:00:59,593 We are going to make America great again, We are going to make America great again,
12 00:00:59,627 00:01:01,562 and it has to start now. and it has to start now.
13 00:01:01,595 00:01:03,231 CLINTON: I hope you will give me a chance CLINTON: I hope you will give me a chance
14 00:01:03,264 00:01:04,965 to serve as your president. to serve as your president.
15 00:01:04,998 00:01:07,067 FAITH: Donald Trump told the American people FAITH: Donald Trump told the American people
16 00:01:07,101 00:01:09,570 the truth tonight, as he always does. the truth tonight, as he always does.
17 00:01:09,603 00:01:12,039 GARY: Hillary Clinton is the real outsider. GARY: Hillary Clinton is the real outsider.
18 00:01:12,072 00:01:14,308 Look, whatever you think you saw tonight... Look, whatever you think you saw tonight...
19 00:01:14,342 00:01:16,377 You didn't. You actually saw what I saw, You didn't. You actually saw what I saw,
20 00:01:16,410 00:01:17,778 and I think that the American people... and I think that the American people...
21 00:01:17,811 00:01:18,946 Would agree with me. Would agree with me.
22 00:01:18,979 00:01:20,814 As long as I say it repeatedly, doggedly... As long as I say it repeatedly, doggedly...
23 00:01:20,848 00:01:23,117 And with unearned confidence. And with unearned confidence.
24 00:01:23,151 00:01:25,286 I lie. I lie.
25 00:01:25,319 00:01:26,754 I am lying to you. I am lying to you.
26 00:01:26,787 00:01:27,821 And you know I lie. And you know I lie.
27 00:01:27,855 00:01:29,390 I'm actually in this position I'm actually in this position
28 00:01:29,423 00:01:31,925 because of how effectively I lie to you. because of how effectively I lie to you.
29 00:01:31,959 00:01:33,060 Are we clear? Are we clear?
30 00:01:33,093 00:01:34,995 We call this the spin room, without shame. We call this the spin room, without shame.
31 00:01:35,028 00:01:37,998 Spinning is something you do to disorient people. Spinning is something you do to disorient people.
32 00:01:38,031 00:01:40,501 And you all know that, and yet here we are. And you all know that, and yet here we are.
33 00:01:40,534 00:01:42,403 What a wonderful play we're putting on. What a wonderful play we're putting on.
34 00:01:42,436 00:01:43,937 Thank you all so much. Thank you all so much.
35 00:01:43,971 00:01:45,173 And fuck you, America. And fuck you, America.
36 00:01:45,206 00:01:47,408 I look forward to lying to you in the future. I look forward to lying to you in the future.
37 00:01:47,441 00:01:48,676 See you at the bar. See you at the bar.
38 00:01:48,709 00:01:50,944 -(reporters clamoring) -Thank you. -(reporters clamoring) -Thank you.
39 00:01:55,949 00:01:57,951 -(explosive blast) -(grunts) -(explosive blast) -(grunts)
40 00:02:09,997 00:02:11,199 LESTER HOLT: Shockwaves across America. LESTER HOLT: Shockwaves across America.
41 00:02:11,232 00:02:12,466 NORAH O'DONNELL: His surprise victory NORAH O'DONNELL: His surprise victory
42 00:02:12,500 00:02:13,701 defied preelection polling. defied preelection polling.
43 00:02:13,734 00:02:15,102 JOHN HEILEMANN: Tectonic-plate-shifting, JOHN HEILEMANN: Tectonic-plate-shifting,
44 00:02:15,135 00:02:16,770 9.5 on the Richter scale earthquake. 9.5 on the Richter scale earthquake.
45 00:02:16,804 00:02:18,206 JOE SCARBOROUGH: So that's just a snapshot JOE SCARBOROUGH: So that's just a snapshot
46 00:02:18,239 00:02:19,640 of the reaction we're getting this morning. of the reaction we're getting this morning.
47 00:02:19,673 00:02:21,108 And we're still trying to get And we're still trying to get
48 00:02:21,141 00:02:23,511 our good old pal Gary Zimmer to talk to us. our good old pal Gary Zimmer to talk to us.
49 00:02:23,544 00:02:25,513 MIKA BRZEZINSKI: He's probably halfway to Canada by now. MIKA BRZEZINSKI: He's probably halfway to Canada by now.
50 00:02:25,546 00:02:27,315 SCARBOROUGH: Yeah, maybe halfway to Canadian Club. SCARBOROUGH: Yeah, maybe halfway to Canadian Club.
51 00:02:27,348 00:02:29,983 I'd love to ask this guy what the hell he was thinking. I'd love to ask this guy what the hell he was thinking.
52 00:02:30,017 00:02:31,985 How did they blow this election? How did they blow this election?
53 00:02:32,019 00:02:34,121 -(Brzezinski chuckles) -Hey, guys, did you find the clip? -(Brzezinski chuckles) -Hey, guys, did you find the clip?
54 00:02:34,154 00:02:35,556 You got it? Okay. You got it? Okay.
55 00:02:35,589 00:02:37,325 This is our good friend Gary Zimmer, This is our good friend Gary Zimmer,
56 00:02:37,358 00:02:40,027 grand old consigliere of the Clinton campaign, grand old consigliere of the Clinton campaign,
57 00:02:40,060 00:02:42,996 not even a week ago on this program. not even a week ago on this program.
58 00:02:43,030 00:02:44,832 -(whooshing sound effect) -So, you're confident? -(whooshing sound effect) -So, you're confident?
59 00:02:44,865 00:02:46,200 GARY (recorded): Oh, no question. GARY (recorded): Oh, no question.
60 00:02:46,234 00:02:47,735 Hillary's made her case. Hillary's made her case.
61 00:02:47,768 00:02:50,804 She is the most qualified presidential candidate, She is the most qualified presidential candidate,
62 00:02:50,838 00:02:52,373 certainly in my lifetime, maybe ever. certainly in my lifetime, maybe ever.
63 00:02:52,406 00:02:54,242 BRZEZINSKI: Donald Trump will not be president. BRZEZINSKI: Donald Trump will not be president.
64 00:02:54,275 00:02:56,677 GARY: Well, he is doing well in the South, GARY: Well, he is doing well in the South,
65 00:02:56,710 00:02:59,313 so maybe he can be president of the Confederacy. so maybe he can be president of the Confederacy.
66 00:02:59,347 00:03:01,582 BRZEZINSKI: But Ohio, Michigan, Pennsylvania. BRZEZINSKI: But Ohio, Michigan, Pennsylvania.
67 00:03:01,615 00:03:03,351 GARY: Mika, he's not winning Pennsylvania. GARY: Mika, he's not winning Pennsylvania.
68 00:03:03,384 00:03:04,885 He's not winning Michigan. He's not winning Michigan.
69 00:03:04,918 00:03:07,821 That rust belt blue wall is impenetrable. It holds. That rust belt blue wall is impenetrable. It holds.
70 00:03:07,855 00:03:09,189 (Southern accent): I guarantee. (Southern accent): I guarantee.
71 00:03:09,223 00:03:10,758 BRZEZINSKI: Well, you decided to spend BRZEZINSKI: Well, you decided to spend
72 00:03:10,791 00:03:12,226 almost no time there campaigning. almost no time there campaigning.
73 00:03:12,260 00:03:13,894 SCARBOROUGH: Was that a Carville impression? SCARBOROUGH: Was that a Carville impression?
74 00:03:13,927 00:03:15,563 -(Brzezinski chuckles) -All right, so wait a minute. -(Brzezinski chuckles) -All right, so wait a minute.
75 00:03:15,596 00:03:17,431 -Tommy, try Gary again. -GARY (in room): Google, off. -Tommy, try Gary again. -GARY (in room): Google, off.
76 00:03:17,465 00:03:19,333 SCARBOROUGH: Okay, we have Faith Brewster on the line... SCARBOROUGH: Okay, we have Faith Brewster on the line...
77 00:03:19,367 00:03:20,601 GARY: Hey, Google, off. GARY: Hey, Google, off.
78 00:03:20,634 00:03:22,436 GOOGLE: Sorry. Power controls is not yet supported. GOOGLE: Sorry. Power controls is not yet supported.
79 00:03:22,470 00:03:24,204 -(phone ringing) -GARY: Phone lady, decline. -(phone ringing) -GARY: Phone lady, decline.
80 00:03:24,238 00:03:26,240 -PHONE: Try asking again in a different way. -GARY: Ugh. -PHONE: Try asking again in a different way. -GARY: Ugh.
81 00:03:26,274 00:03:28,609 Hang up. Hey, Google, tell phone lady to hang up. Hang up. Hey, Google, tell phone lady to hang up.
82 00:03:28,642 00:03:30,578 GOOGLE: Sorry, I'm not sure how to help with that yet. GOOGLE: Sorry, I'm not sure how to help with that yet.
83 00:03:30,611 00:03:32,546 -GARY: Off, off! -PHONE: Sorry, I'm still not sure about that. -GARY: Off, off! -PHONE: Sorry, I'm still not sure about that.
84 00:03:32,580 00:03:33,947 GARY: Hey, Google, disengage. GARY: Hey, Google, disengage.
85 00:03:33,981 00:03:35,249 -GOOGLE: Songs aren't available on SiriusXM. -Abort. -GOOGLE: Songs aren't available on SiriusXM. -Abort.
86 00:03:35,283 00:03:36,684 -PHONE: I'm not sure about that. -Everybody, shut up! -PHONE: I'm not sure about that. -Everybody, shut up!
87 00:03:36,717 00:03:38,852 -PHONE: Try asking again in a different way. -(Gary grunts) -PHONE: Try asking again in a different way. -(Gary grunts)
88 00:03:38,886 00:03:41,889 ("Still the Same" by Bob Seger playing) ("Still the Same" by Bob Seger playing)
89 00:03:57,771 00:03:59,640 * You always won * You always won
90 00:03:59,673 00:04:02,443 * Every time you placed a bet * Every time you placed a bet
91 00:04:05,012 00:04:07,247 * You're still damn good * You're still damn good
92 00:04:08,649 00:04:11,251 * No one's gotten to you yet * No one's gotten to you yet
93 00:04:13,821 00:04:15,923 * Every time * Every time
94 00:04:15,956 00:04:19,593 * They were sure they had you caught * * They were sure they had you caught *
95 00:04:19,627 00:04:23,263 * You were quicker than they thought * * You were quicker than they thought *
96 00:04:24,832 00:04:29,236 * You'd just turn your back and walk * * You'd just turn your back and walk *
97 00:04:29,269 00:04:32,473 * And you're still the same * And you're still the same
98 00:04:32,506 00:04:35,242 * I caught up with you yesterday * * I caught up with you yesterday *
99 00:04:35,275 00:04:37,811 * Still the same, still the same * * Still the same, still the same *
100 00:04:37,845 00:04:39,847 * Moving game to game * Moving game to game
101 00:04:41,281 00:04:44,518 * No one standing in your way * No one standing in your way
102 00:04:45,953 00:04:50,324 * Turning on the charm long enough * * Turning on the charm long enough *
103 00:04:50,358 00:04:51,992 * To get you by * To get you by
104 00:04:52,025 00:04:53,827 * Still the same * Still the same
105 00:04:53,861 00:04:55,095 * Still the same * Still the same
106 00:04:55,128 00:04:57,465 * You're still the same * You're still the same
107 00:04:58,699 00:05:03,704 * You still aim high * You still aim high
108 00:05:08,376 00:05:11,912 * Still the same, still the same * * Still the same, still the same *
109 00:05:16,183 00:05:19,553 (fading): * Still the same, still the same. * (fading): * Still the same, still the same. *
110 00:05:19,587 00:05:21,589 (birds chirping) (birds chirping)
111 00:05:32,600 00:05:34,602 (scrubbing hands) (scrubbing hands)
112 00:05:42,443 00:05:44,044 (water splashing) (water splashing)
113 00:05:44,077 00:05:48,816 * There's been a load of compromisin' * * There's been a load of compromisin' *
114 00:05:48,849 00:05:53,186 * On the road to my horizon * On the road to my horizon
115 00:05:53,220 00:05:56,256 * But I'm gonna be where the lights * * But I'm gonna be where the lights *
116 00:05:56,289 00:06:00,360 * Are shinin' on me * Are shinin' on me
117 00:06:00,394 00:06:03,764 * Like a rhinestone cowboy * Like a rhinestone cowboy
118 00:06:05,566 00:06:10,738 * Riding out on a horse in a star-spangled rodeo * * Riding out on a horse in a star-spangled rodeo *
119 00:06:12,773 00:06:15,476 * Like a rhinestone cowboy * Like a rhinestone cowboy
120 00:06:17,811 00:06:23,083 * Getting cards and letters from people I don't even know * * Getting cards and letters from people I don't even know *
121 00:06:24,818 00:06:29,757 * And offers comin' over the phone. * * And offers comin' over the phone. *
122 00:06:32,392 00:06:34,394 (song fades) (song fades)
123 00:06:36,797 00:06:39,266 MAYOR BRAUN: So, if there is no further discussion, MAYOR BRAUN: So, if there is no further discussion,
124 00:06:39,299 00:06:42,369 can I get a motion to vote on Resolution 1217, can I get a motion to vote on Resolution 1217,
125 00:06:42,402 00:06:45,806 requiring a valid Wisconsin driver's license requiring a valid Wisconsin driver's license
126 00:06:45,839 00:06:48,809 or proof of U.S. citizenship to qualify or proof of U.S. citizenship to qualify
127 00:06:48,842 00:06:52,079 for any state or municipality program or benefit, for any state or municipality program or benefit,
128 00:06:52,112 00:06:55,916 such as food stamps, welfare and so on and so forth. such as food stamps, welfare and so on and so forth.
129 00:06:55,949 00:06:57,117 PIETKOWSKI: So moved. PIETKOWSKI: So moved.
130 00:06:57,150 00:06:58,251 -Second? -MAN: Second. -Second? -MAN: Second.
131 00:06:58,285 00:06:59,820 I have a second. It is time... I have a second. It is time...
132 00:06:59,853 00:07:01,755 -Excuse me, fellas. -Jack, I already told you, -Excuse me, fellas. -Jack, I already told you,
133 00:07:01,789 00:07:03,457 you can widen that easement on Hamburg... you can widen that easement on Hamburg...
134 00:07:03,491 00:07:05,793 Um, actually, it's about Um, actually, it's about
135 00:07:05,826 00:07:08,261 that resolution you're thinking about passing. that resolution you're thinking about passing.
136 00:07:08,295 00:07:11,298 With all due respect, Colonel, that discussion has ended. With all due respect, Colonel, that discussion has ended.
137 00:07:11,331 00:07:12,966 Yeah, yeah. So I heard. Yeah, yeah. So I heard.
138 00:07:13,000 00:07:14,968 But, uh... But, uh...
139 00:07:15,002 00:07:17,337 the thing is that, um... the thing is that, um...
140 00:07:17,370 00:07:19,339 it's a bad idea. it's a bad idea.
141 00:07:19,372 00:07:21,575 -Y-You can't... -Uh, okay, well, -Y-You can't... -Uh, okay, well,
142 00:07:21,609 00:07:23,276 I already seconded, but whatever. I already seconded, but whatever.
143 00:07:23,310 00:07:25,445 JACK: I know we're in a bad spot, but... JACK: I know we're in a bad spot, but...
144 00:07:25,479 00:07:26,980 you can't bring it back you can't bring it back
145 00:07:27,014 00:07:29,016 by throwing these people under the bus. by throwing these people under the bus.
146 00:07:29,049 00:07:31,685 Whoa, we're not throwing anybody under anything, Jack. Whoa, we're not throwing anybody under anything, Jack.
147 00:07:31,719 00:07:33,453 (sighs) Money was tight (sighs) Money was tight
148 00:07:33,487 00:07:35,923 when the base was still open, but now... when the base was still open, but now...
149 00:07:35,956 00:07:37,925 I mean, we just got to be smart. I mean, we just got to be smart.
150 00:07:37,958 00:07:39,827 We got to eliminate cheating the programs. We got to eliminate cheating the programs.
151 00:07:39,860 00:07:42,429 There's not a damn soul using those programs There's not a damn soul using those programs
152 00:07:42,462 00:07:44,297 that doesn't need 'em, and you know it. that doesn't need 'em, and you know it.
153 00:07:44,331 00:07:47,200 And all they need to do is produce the acceptable I.D., And all they need to do is produce the acceptable I.D.,
154 00:07:47,234 00:07:48,536 and the benefits will be... and the benefits will be...
155 00:07:48,569 00:07:50,370 And you know they can't do that. And you know they can't do that.
156 00:07:50,403 00:07:53,173 Well... (sighs) I don't make the rules, Jack. Well... (sighs) I don't make the rules, Jack.
157 00:07:54,842 00:07:57,010 I mean, I do, I guess. I mean, I do, I guess.
158 00:07:57,044 00:08:00,180 Not by myself, but... this is over. Not by myself, but... this is over.
159 00:08:01,214 00:08:02,850 (grunts) (grunts)
160 00:08:02,883 00:08:05,218 BRAUN: Okay, we have a motion that has been seconded. BRAUN: Okay, we have a motion that has been seconded.
161 00:08:05,252 00:08:07,320 It is time to bring it to a vote. It is time to bring it to a vote.
162 00:08:07,354 00:08:09,056 Uh, you know, uh, just curious-- Uh, you know, uh, just curious--
163 00:08:09,089 00:08:11,358 you know, when the river backed up you know, when the river backed up
164 00:08:11,391 00:08:13,293 and the folks you think might be cheating and the folks you think might be cheating
165 00:08:13,326 00:08:15,629 stood shoulder to shoulder with us stood shoulder to shoulder with us
166 00:08:15,663 00:08:19,299 stuffing sandbags for three days straight, stuffing sandbags for three days straight,
167 00:08:19,332 00:08:22,369 ended up saving your store, you check their I.D.'s then? ended up saving your store, you check their I.D.'s then?
168 00:08:22,402 00:08:23,904 BRAUN: Discussion's closed, Jack. BRAUN: Discussion's closed, Jack.
169 00:08:23,937 00:08:25,806 You checking I.D.'s when they're bringing food You checking I.D.'s when they're bringing food
170 00:08:25,839 00:08:27,908 -to the church potlucks, Walt? -(gavel slamming) -to the church potlucks, Walt? -(gavel slamming)
171 00:08:29,042 00:08:30,510 Enough, Jack. Enough, Jack.
172 00:08:30,544 00:08:32,179 You had your say. You had your say.
173 00:08:34,081 00:08:35,749 (sets down gavel) (sets down gavel)
174 00:08:35,783 00:08:37,851 Look, we got rules here, Look, we got rules here,
175 00:08:37,885 00:08:39,553 but that don't make us bad people. but that don't make us bad people.
176 00:08:39,587 00:08:41,889 I'm not saying you're a bad person, Billy. I'm not saying you're a bad person, Billy.
177 00:08:41,922 00:08:44,257 I'm saying you're scared. I'm saying you're scared.
178 00:08:44,291 00:08:46,493 Hell, we all are. Hell, we all are.
179 00:08:46,526 00:08:50,831 Damn town went from 15,000 to five overnight, Damn town went from 15,000 to five overnight,
180 00:08:50,864 00:08:53,066 and business went with it. and business went with it.
181 00:08:53,100 00:08:56,737 We're not bringing it back by... by turning on each other. We're not bringing it back by... by turning on each other.
182 00:08:57,771 00:08:59,406 Corps taught me the chain's Corps taught me the chain's
183 00:08:59,439 00:09:01,742 only as strong as its weakest link. only as strong as its weakest link.
184 00:09:01,775 00:09:04,712 And Father Heuvel here And Father Heuvel here
185 00:09:04,745 00:09:06,947 taught me that I am my brother's keeper. taught me that I am my brother's keeper.
186 00:09:06,980 00:09:08,749 GARY: Wait. Go back to that "weak link" part. GARY: Wait. Go back to that "weak link" part.
187 00:09:08,782 00:09:11,051 Whatever you do for the least of us, you do for the Lord. Whatever you do for the least of us, you do for the Lord.
188 00:09:11,084 00:09:12,252 -EVAN: Yeah, okay. Yeah. -(mouse clicking) -EVAN: Yeah, okay. Yeah. -(mouse clicking)
189 00:09:12,285 00:09:14,054 I mean, could this guy work? I mean, could this guy work?
190 00:09:14,087 00:09:15,522 Corps taught me the chain's Corps taught me the chain's
191 00:09:15,555 00:09:17,625 only as strong as its weakest link. only as strong as its weakest link.
192 00:09:17,658 00:09:19,359 Hmm. Pretty good. Hmm. Pretty good.
193 00:09:19,392 00:09:21,729 -EVAN: Mm-hmm. -JACK: And Father Heuvel here -EVAN: Mm-hmm. -JACK: And Father Heuvel here
194 00:09:21,762 00:09:24,064 taught me that I am my brother's keeper. taught me that I am my brother's keeper.
195 00:09:24,097 00:09:26,867 Whatever you do for the least of us, you do for the Lord. Whatever you do for the least of us, you do for the Lord.
196 00:09:26,900 00:09:29,302 GARY: Looks conservative, sounds progressive. GARY: Looks conservative, sounds progressive.
197 00:09:29,336 00:09:31,905 -EVAN: Mm-hmm. -JACK: The point is, -EVAN: Mm-hmm. -JACK: The point is,
198 00:09:31,939 00:09:35,976 it's easy to be strong of character in the good times. it's easy to be strong of character in the good times.
199 00:09:36,009 00:09:38,545 The test is the bad times. The test is the bad times.
200 00:09:38,578 00:09:41,615 If you can't live your principles then, well... If you can't live your principles then, well...
201 00:09:41,649 00:09:44,785 I guess they aren't principles; they're just hobbies. I guess they aren't principles; they're just hobbies.
202 00:09:46,286 00:09:47,554 Where is this again? Where is this again?
203 00:09:47,587 00:09:48,722 Wisconsin. Wisconsin.
204 00:09:48,756 00:09:50,924 Deer cloth. Deer cloth.
205 00:09:50,958 00:09:53,627 -Deal sheets. -Mm-hmm. -Deal sheets. -Mm-hmm.
206 00:09:53,661 00:09:54,995 Gentlemen... Gentlemen...
207 00:09:55,028 00:09:57,665 this square-jawed paragon of Americana this square-jawed paragon of Americana
208 00:09:57,698 00:10:01,802 is our goddamn key back into the forbidden city. is our goddamn key back into the forbidden city.
209 00:10:01,835 00:10:03,737 -Well, that's my stop. (laughs) -Sit. Kurt, sit. -Well, that's my stop. (laughs) -Sit. Kurt, sit.
210 00:10:03,771 00:10:05,305 -Call me when he gets to the point. -Nope. -Call me when he gets to the point. -Nope.
211 00:10:05,338 00:10:06,473 You're not going anywhere. No, sit. You're not going anywhere. No, sit.
212 00:10:06,506 00:10:07,675 And we have Alan to thank And we have Alan to thank
213 00:10:07,708 00:10:09,677 for bringing this man to our attention. for bringing this man to our attention.
214 00:10:09,710 00:10:12,112 -It's Evan. -Did I happen to mention that -It's Evan. -Did I happen to mention that
215 00:10:12,145 00:10:14,147 he is a veteran of the United States Marine Corps? he is a veteran of the United States Marine Corps?
216 00:10:14,181 00:10:16,116 -OTHERS: Yes. -And a farmer. -OTHERS: Yes. -And a farmer.
217 00:10:16,149 00:10:17,350 -Um... you did. -MAN: I believe so. -Um... you did. -MAN: I believe so.
218 00:10:17,384 00:10:18,952 And did I happen to mention that he's a widower? And did I happen to mention that he's a widower?
219 00:10:18,986 00:10:19,953 -Impressive. -All right. Well done. -Impressive. -All right. Well done.
220 00:10:19,987 00:10:21,288 GARY: A man who makes Joe the Plumber GARY: A man who makes Joe the Plumber
221 00:10:21,321 00:10:22,856 look like Dukakis in mom jeans look like Dukakis in mom jeans
222 00:10:22,890 00:10:24,758 -and a fucking Easter bonnet... -(laughter) -and a fucking Easter bonnet... -(laughter)
223 00:10:24,792 00:10:26,459 in the reddest of counties in the reddest of counties
224 00:10:26,493 00:10:29,629 -in the great now swing state of Wisconsin... -Mm-hmm. -in the great now swing state of Wisconsin... -Mm-hmm.
225 00:10:29,663 00:10:30,798 ...is... ...is...
226 00:10:32,199 00:10:34,334 ...a Democrat. ...a Democrat.
227 00:10:34,367 00:10:36,036 Uh, he's a Democrat? Uh, he's a Democrat?
228 00:10:36,069 00:10:37,437 Yeah. Yeah.
229 00:10:37,470 00:10:39,439 He just doesn't know it yet. He just doesn't know it yet.
230 00:10:39,472 00:10:41,608 Well, here's the idea: I get on a plane, Well, here's the idea: I get on a plane,
231 00:10:41,641 00:10:44,444 and I go to Wisconsin, and I use this guy and I go to Wisconsin, and I use this guy
232 00:10:44,477 00:10:47,280 to road-test a more rural-friendly message. to road-test a more rural-friendly message.
233 00:10:47,314 00:10:50,617 It's a mayoral race... in the middle of nowhere. It's a mayoral race... in the middle of nowhere.
234 00:10:50,650 00:10:52,519 Uh, I don't get how this helps us. Uh, I don't get how this helps us.
235 00:10:52,552 00:10:54,988 There are two million rural votes in these states alone. There are two million rural votes in these states alone.
236 00:10:55,022 00:10:57,124 If we lost them 2.7 to one instead of three to one, If we lost them 2.7 to one instead of three to one,
237 00:10:57,157 00:10:59,392 we'd win, but we didn't even try. we'd win, but we didn't even try.
238 00:10:59,426 00:11:00,961 Their base turned out. Ours didn't. Their base turned out. Ours didn't.
239 00:11:00,994 00:11:03,964 If we find a candidate to activate our base... If we find a candidate to activate our base...
240 00:11:03,997 00:11:07,034 if our African Americans if our African Americans
241 00:11:07,067 00:11:08,235 (heavily accented): and Latino communities... (heavily accented): and Latino communities...
242 00:11:08,268 00:11:09,302 It's just "Latino." It's just "Latino."
243 00:11:09,336 00:11:11,571 ...show up, we win. ...show up, we win.
244 00:11:11,604 00:11:13,874 We have to get the rural voters back into the tent, We have to get the rural voters back into the tent,
245 00:11:13,907 00:11:15,075 even just a little bit. even just a little bit.
246 00:11:15,108 00:11:16,744 Well, if it's all the same to you, Well, if it's all the same to you,
247 00:11:16,777 00:11:18,045 I'll stick with pandering I'll stick with pandering
248 00:11:18,078 00:11:22,215 to our special-interest groups, thank you very much. to our special-interest groups, thank you very much.
249 00:11:22,249 00:11:26,553 GROUP (chanting): Yes, you can. Yes you can. GROUP (chanting): Yes, you can. Yes you can.
250 00:11:26,586 00:11:29,556 -Sí, se... -I like the idea of expanding our base. -Sí, se... -I like the idea of expanding our base.
251 00:11:29,589 00:11:32,459 Not taking any voter for granted. Not taking any voter for granted.
252 00:11:33,526 00:11:34,762 It does have some merit. It does have some merit.
253 00:11:38,231 00:11:39,232 WOMAN: Good morning. Gary Zimmer's office. WOMAN: Good morning. Gary Zimmer's office.
254 00:11:39,266 00:11:40,333 ASSISTANT: Okay, so we'll make sure ASSISTANT: Okay, so we'll make sure
255 00:11:40,367 00:11:41,769 a car comes here and picks you up, a car comes here and picks you up,
256 00:11:41,802 00:11:43,503 -and we'll make sure the driver is Frank. -Okay. -and we'll make sure the driver is Frank. -Okay.
257 00:11:43,536 00:11:44,905 Um, it's a two-hour flight, Um, it's a two-hour flight,
258 00:11:44,938 00:11:46,573 but you'll gain an hour when you get there. but you'll gain an hour when you get there.
259 00:11:46,606 00:11:49,209 -(sighs) What is that? -The 7 Series. -(sighs) What is that? -The 7 Series.
260 00:11:49,242 00:11:51,779 It was the closest thing they had to your Tesla, but... It was the closest thing they had to your Tesla, but...
261 00:11:51,812 00:11:53,847 Just take a Sharpie, and write "liberal city douchebag" Just take a Sharpie, and write "liberal city douchebag"
262 00:11:53,881 00:11:55,115 on my forehead, okay? on my forehead, okay?
263 00:11:55,148 00:11:56,616 -Come on, guys. -Yeah. -Come on, guys. -Yeah.
264 00:11:56,649 00:11:58,118 Um, Accord? Um, Accord?
265 00:11:58,151 00:11:59,586 I'm traveling to America. I'm traveling to America.
266 00:11:59,619 00:12:01,521 Explorer, neutral color. Explorer, neutral color.
267 00:12:01,554 00:12:03,023 And pack me like a conference. And pack me like a conference.
268 00:12:03,056 00:12:04,191 Davos? TED? Davos? TED?
269 00:12:04,224 00:12:05,759 Aspen, weekend package. Aspen, weekend package.
270 00:12:05,793 00:12:07,227 -Thank you. -Great. -Thank you. -Great.
271 00:12:07,260 00:12:08,561 Oh, and, guys, you know what? Oh, and, guys, you know what?
272 00:12:08,595 00:12:10,197 Keep it simple. Keep it simple.
273 00:12:10,230 00:12:11,364 Simple. No frills. Simple. No frills.
274 00:12:11,398 00:12:12,632 -Thank you. -Got it. -Sure. -Thank you. -Got it. -Sure.
275 00:12:12,665 00:12:13,967 Great. Great.
276 00:12:14,001 00:12:16,703 Although, if the Explorer has a-a Bose Although, if the Explorer has a-a Bose
277 00:12:16,736 00:12:18,371 or a Bang & Olufsen sound package, or a Bang & Olufsen sound package,
278 00:12:18,405 00:12:20,240 if they have it... (clicks tongue) it'd be good. if they have it... (clicks tongue) it'd be good.
279 00:12:20,273 00:12:22,575 -Great. -Gotcha. -Great. -Gotcha.
280 00:12:22,609 00:12:24,878 Did they say anything about catering? Did they say anything about catering?
281 00:12:24,912 00:12:26,313 Not yet. Not yet.
282 00:12:26,346 00:12:27,881 Those little mozzarella balls would be great. Those little mozzarella balls would be great.
283 00:12:27,915 00:12:29,316 -Yeah? -Caprese salad. -Yeah? -Caprese salad.
284 00:12:29,349 00:12:30,784 -Something light. Balsamic. -Yeah, just... -Something light. Balsamic. -Yeah, just...
285 00:12:30,818 00:12:32,085 Balsamic, all that jazz? Balsamic, all that jazz?
286 00:12:32,119 00:12:33,653 Cool. Cool.
287 00:12:37,457 00:12:38,658 Nothing. Nothing.
288 00:12:38,691 00:12:39,893 -Cool. -(Gary laughing) -Cool. -(Gary laughing)
289 00:12:39,927 00:12:42,295 That's fun. That's fun.
290 00:12:42,329 00:12:44,497 (sighs) (sighs)
291 00:12:44,531 00:12:45,799 SPORTSCASTER: He'll flip the short pass. SPORTSCASTER: He'll flip the short pass.
292 00:12:45,833 00:12:47,634 Complete to Anderson. He's at the 35. Complete to Anderson. He's at the 35.
293 00:12:47,667 00:12:49,069 He moves to the 30-yard line... He moves to the 30-yard line...
294 00:12:49,102 00:12:50,838 -Here you go, Mr. Zimmer. -Oh, thank you. -Here you go, Mr. Zimmer. -Oh, thank you.
295 00:12:50,871 00:12:52,305 NARRATOR (over TV): Trailing by three points... NARRATOR (over TV): Trailing by three points...
296 00:12:52,339 00:12:53,807 -Thanks. -Mm-hmm. -Thanks. -Mm-hmm.
297 00:12:53,841 00:12:57,744 ...with time running out, the Packers roll 68 yards ...with time running out, the Packers roll 68 yards
298 00:12:57,777 00:13:01,148 across the frozen field and into legend. across the frozen field and into legend.
299 00:13:01,181 00:13:02,782 (dramatic music plays over TV) (dramatic music plays over TV)
300 00:13:02,816 00:13:04,284 SPORTSCASTER: He flips the pass. It's complete. SPORTSCASTER: He flips the pass. It's complete.
301 00:13:04,317 00:13:06,186 To Chuck Mercein. He's at the 25, the 20... To Chuck Mercein. He's at the 25, the 20...
302 00:13:06,219 00:13:08,521 NARRATOR: With only three minutes to play, NARRATOR: With only three minutes to play,
303 00:13:08,555 00:13:11,524 all the hopes and dreams of an entire season all the hopes and dreams of an entire season
304 00:13:11,558 00:13:13,961 rested on the shoulders of one man. rested on the shoulders of one man.
305 00:13:13,994 00:13:17,564 * Like a rhinestone cowboy * Like a rhinestone cowboy
306 00:13:19,799 00:13:22,169 * Riding out on a horse * Riding out on a horse
307 00:13:22,202 00:13:26,039 * In a star-spangled rodeo * In a star-spangled rodeo
308 00:13:26,073 00:13:27,674 -* Like a rhine... -(changes station) -* Like a rhine... -(changes station)
309 00:13:27,707 00:13:29,109 TERRY GROSS: This is "Fresh Air." TERRY GROSS: This is "Fresh Air."
310 00:13:29,142 00:13:30,477 -I'm Terry Gross. -(takes deep breath) -I'm Terry Gross. -(takes deep breath)
311 00:13:30,510 00:13:31,678 Richard Rodgers and Oscar Hammerstein Richard Rodgers and Oscar Hammerstein
312 00:13:31,711 00:13:33,813 had one of the most successful had one of the most successful
313 00:13:33,847 00:13:36,316 musical partnerships of the 20th century. musical partnerships of the 20th century.
314 00:13:36,349 00:13:39,286 TODD S. PURDUM: But I also think it's-it's a canard TODD S. PURDUM: But I also think it's-it's a canard
315 00:13:39,319 00:13:41,054 that Hammerstein can't write funny songs. that Hammerstein can't write funny songs.
316 00:13:41,088 00:13:42,689 GROSS: She's got a beautiful voice, GROSS: She's got a beautiful voice,
317 00:13:42,722 00:13:44,157 so let's hear her singing so let's hear her singing
318 00:13:44,191 00:13:45,658 "Everybody's Got a Home but Me." "Everybody's Got a Home but Me."
319 00:13:45,692 00:13:47,360 Will you set the scene for us Will you set the scene for us
320 00:13:47,394 00:13:49,696 about where this song fits into the show? about where this song fits into the show?
321 00:13:49,729 00:13:51,198 PURDUM: Well, this young prostitute PURDUM: Well, this young prostitute
322 00:13:51,231 00:13:53,000 has just arrived in Monterey... has just arrived in Monterey...
323 00:13:54,267 00:13:56,403 (vehicle door opens, closes) (vehicle door opens, closes)
324 00:13:56,436 00:13:58,438 (indistinct chatter) (indistinct chatter)
325 00:13:59,907 00:14:02,642 -(sighs) -BARTENDER: Oh. -(sighs) -BARTENDER: Oh.
326 00:14:02,675 00:14:04,077 -Evening. -Hey. -Evening. -Hey.
327 00:14:04,111 00:14:05,512 Hi. What can I get you? Hi. What can I get you?
328 00:14:05,545 00:14:08,481 Uh, how about a Bud and a burger? Uh, how about a Bud and a burger?
329 00:14:08,515 00:14:11,351 That sounds good. That sounds good.
330 00:14:11,384 00:14:13,653 -Thank you so much. -Sure thing. -Thank you so much. -Sure thing.
331 00:14:13,686 00:14:15,055 Coming up. Coming up.
332 00:14:16,189 00:14:17,257 -Hey, Charlie. -(knocking) -Hey, Charlie. -(knocking)
333 00:14:20,928 00:14:22,829 Tough day? Tough day?
334 00:14:22,862 00:14:25,065 -A long day, traveling. -Oh, yeah? -A long day, traveling. -Oh, yeah?
335 00:14:25,098 00:14:27,100 -Where from? -Washington, D.C. -Where from? -Washington, D.C.
336 00:14:27,134 00:14:29,436 Man, I ain't been there since, like, a school trip. Man, I ain't been there since, like, a school trip.
337 00:14:29,469 00:14:31,438 Can't even remember how many years ago that was. Can't even remember how many years ago that was.
338 00:14:31,471 00:14:32,772 -It was 29. 29 years. -Yeah? -It was 29. 29 years. -Yeah?
339 00:14:32,805 00:14:35,175 -Was it? -29 years. Ms. Heuvel's history class. -Was it? -29 years. Ms. Heuvel's history class.
340 00:14:35,208 00:14:36,743 -That's what it was. Ms. Heuvel's history class. -Yeah. -That's what it was. Ms. Heuvel's history class. -Yeah.
341 00:14:36,776 00:14:38,411 Security guards chased us out of the Space Museum. Security guards chased us out of the Space Museum.
342 00:14:38,445 00:14:40,713 Yeah, well, we beat the dog shit out of those other kids. Yeah, well, we beat the dog shit out of those other kids.
343 00:14:40,747 00:14:41,848 (laughter) (laughter)
344 00:14:41,881 00:14:43,350 Well, you guys aren't missing anything. Well, you guys aren't missing anything.
345 00:14:43,383 00:14:45,285 It is a nightmare down there. It is a nightmare down there.
346 00:14:45,318 00:14:47,120 -Huh. Yeah. (chuckles) -Well, no argument there. -Huh. Yeah. (chuckles) -Well, no argument there.
347 00:14:47,154 00:14:49,189 -Yeah. You can say that again. -Mm-hmm. -Yeah. You can say that again. -Mm-hmm.
348 00:14:49,222 00:14:51,558 -Mike Staadt. -Hey. -Mike Staadt. -Hey.
349 00:14:51,591 00:14:53,593 -We call him Big Mike. -Yeah. -We call him Big Mike. -Yeah.
350 00:14:53,626 00:14:55,295 People call me Big Mike for some reason. People call me Big Mike for some reason.
351 00:14:55,328 00:14:57,064 Well, it's, uh, because... to tell us apart. Well, it's, uh, because... to tell us apart.
352 00:14:57,097 00:14:59,232 Because I'm... my name's Mike, too, but I'm Little Mike. Because I'm... my name's Mike, too, but I'm Little Mike.
353 00:14:59,266 00:15:00,733 Hey. How are you? Gary. Hey. How are you? Gary.
354 00:15:00,767 00:15:02,869 -Nice to meet you. -Gary, Gary. -Nice to meet you. -Gary, Gary.
355 00:15:02,902 00:15:05,205 Gary from D.C. D.C. Gary. Gary from D.C. D.C. Gary.
356 00:15:05,238 00:15:07,207 BIG MIKE: He likes to give everybody nicknames, so that's BIG MIKE: He likes to give everybody nicknames, so that's
357 00:15:07,240 00:15:09,042 why he's-he's giving you a nickname right now, which... why he's-he's giving you a nickname right now, which...
358 00:15:09,076 00:15:10,944 -(chuckles) -It shows friendship and affection. -(chuckles) -It shows friendship and affection.
359 00:15:10,978 00:15:13,080 -Okay, yeah, but he doesn't... -If you don't like yours, -Okay, yeah, but he doesn't... -If you don't like yours,
360 00:15:13,113 00:15:14,647 -I'll take it away. -No, I'm fine with my nickname. -I'll take it away. -No, I'm fine with my nickname.
361 00:15:14,681 00:15:15,815 Well, I appreciate it, Little Mike. Well, I appreciate it, Little Mike.
362 00:15:15,848 00:15:17,284 LITTLE MIKE: Okay, thank you, D.C. Gary. LITTLE MIKE: Okay, thank you, D.C. Gary.
363 00:15:17,317 00:15:18,952 Hey, this is our new friend, D.C. Gary. Hey, this is our new friend, D.C. Gary.
364 00:15:18,986 00:15:20,653 -Hey. How are you? -BARTENDER: Hey. -Hey. How are you? -BARTENDER: Hey.
365 00:15:20,687 00:15:22,956 -Dave. -My name is Gary, and I'm from D.C., so... -Dave. -My name is Gary, and I'm from D.C., so...
366 00:15:22,990 00:15:24,224 -that works. -Well, welcome to Deerlaken. -that works. -Well, welcome to Deerlaken.
367 00:15:24,257 00:15:26,960 -Thank you. -Ever been to Wisconsin before? -Thank you. -Ever been to Wisconsin before?
368 00:15:26,994 00:15:28,828 Uh, spent a fair amount of time in Madison. Uh, spent a fair amount of time in Madison.
369 00:15:28,861 00:15:30,397 -So that's a no. -(laughter) -So that's a no. -(laughter)
370 00:15:30,430 00:15:31,931 -(chuckles) -That's not Wisconsin. -(chuckles) -That's not Wisconsin.
371 00:15:31,965 00:15:34,434 Actually, I'm here to see Jack Hastings. You know him? Actually, I'm here to see Jack Hastings. You know him?
372 00:15:34,467 00:15:36,569 -Oh, yeah. He's a great guy. -Yeah, everybody knows Jack. -Oh, yeah. He's a great guy. -Yeah, everybody knows Jack.
373 00:15:36,603 00:15:37,904 -The Colonel. Great guy. -Semper fi. -The Colonel. Great guy. -Semper fi.
374 00:15:37,937 00:15:39,339 -Yeah. -DAVE: YouTube star. -Yeah. -DAVE: YouTube star.
375 00:15:39,372 00:15:42,009 We've got some rooms upstairs, if you need. We've got some rooms upstairs, if you need.
376 00:15:42,042 00:15:44,311 -Sure. That sounds good. -Tonya? -Sure. That sounds good. -Tonya?
377 00:15:44,344 00:15:45,478 Yeah, baby. Yeah, baby.
378 00:15:45,512 00:15:47,114 This gentleman here would like a room. This gentleman here would like a room.
379 00:15:47,147 00:15:49,482 Oh, sure. What do you need, hon? Oh, sure. What do you need, hon?
380 00:15:49,516 00:15:52,085 Uh, anything. Any room is fine. Uh, anything. Any room is fine.
381 00:15:52,119 00:15:53,486 Okay. Okay.
382 00:15:53,520 00:15:55,989 If you have something on a high floor If you have something on a high floor
383 00:15:56,023 00:15:57,790 with a king bed and a coffee maker... with a king bed and a coffee maker...
384 00:15:57,824 00:15:59,692 Okay. Yeah, we... everything's on the second floor. Okay. Yeah, we... everything's on the second floor.
385 00:15:59,726 00:16:01,294 -Perfect. -They're all pretty much the same. -Perfect. -They're all pretty much the same.
386 00:16:01,328 00:16:03,430 -That's perfect. I'm easy. -(Tonya chuckles) -That's perfect. I'm easy. -(Tonya chuckles)
387 00:16:03,463 00:16:05,632 -GARY: Anything's good. -Take 206. It's the biggest. -GARY: Anything's good. -Take 206. It's the biggest.
388 00:16:05,665 00:16:06,966 -They're all unlocked. -Okay. -They're all unlocked. -Okay.
389 00:16:07,000 00:16:08,901 Thank you so much, Tonya. Thank you so much, Tonya.
390 00:16:10,637 00:16:12,472 -LITTLE MIKE: Hey, so, D.C. Gary. -Yeah. -LITTLE MIKE: Hey, so, D.C. Gary. -Yeah.
391 00:16:12,505 00:16:14,041 You ever been to the White House? You ever been to the White House?
392 00:16:14,074 00:16:15,775 -I have. -BIG MIKE: What's that like? -I have. -BIG MIKE: What's that like?
393 00:16:15,808 00:16:17,877 What's that like? It's a lot smaller than you think. What's that like? It's a lot smaller than you think.
394 00:16:17,910 00:16:19,312 -Thanks. -What? -Really? -Yeah. -Thanks. -What? -Really? -Yeah.
395 00:16:19,346 00:16:21,214 BIG MIKE: Yeah, 'cause we didn't... I don't think we got BIG MIKE: Yeah, 'cause we didn't... I don't think we got
396 00:16:21,248 00:16:22,382 by there on that student trip. by there on that student trip.
397 00:16:22,415 00:16:24,117 Must not have been built at that point. Must not have been built at that point.
398 00:16:24,151 00:16:25,785 Oh, that looks delicious. Thank you so much. Oh, that looks delicious. Thank you so much.
399 00:16:25,818 00:16:27,354 Do you have a bottle opener? Do you have a bottle opener?
400 00:16:27,387 00:16:29,356 -That's a... no, that's just a twist. -Bud, you just twist. -That's a... no, that's just a twist. -Bud, you just twist.
401 00:16:29,389 00:16:30,890 -Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. -It's a twist-off. -Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. -It's a twist-off.
402 00:16:30,923 00:16:32,125 I know. I know. I know. I know.
403 00:16:32,159 00:16:33,626 Maybe he does need a bottle opener. Maybe he does need a bottle opener.
404 00:16:33,660 00:16:35,162 -Maybe use your-your vest. -He's probably... -Maybe use your-your vest. -He's probably...
405 00:16:35,195 00:16:36,996 -Maybe a European grip. -Ah, I got it. -(cap pops) -Maybe a European grip. -Ah, I got it. -(cap pops)
406 00:16:37,030 00:16:38,398 -There we go. -There we go. -(cap clatters) -There we go. -There we go. -(cap clatters)
407 00:16:38,431 00:16:39,566 Cheers. Cheers.
408 00:16:39,599 00:16:41,068 -Hey. -Cheers. -Cheers. -Hey. -Cheers. -Cheers.
409 00:16:41,101 00:16:42,735 -Cheers. -Here's to you. -Cheers. -Cheers. -Here's to you. -Cheers.
410 00:16:42,769 00:16:44,671 Budweiser. Budweiser.
411 00:16:44,704 00:16:47,707 Mmm. Mmm. Mmm. Mmm.
412 00:16:47,740 00:16:49,776 (sniffs) Mm-hmm. (sniffs) Mm-hmm.
413 00:16:52,745 00:16:55,115 You got to be kidding me. You got to be kidding me.
414 00:17:01,188 00:17:03,223 (sighs): Okay. (sighs): Okay.
415 00:17:03,256 00:17:05,258 (clears throat, grunts) (clears throat, grunts)
416 00:17:05,292 00:17:06,993 All right. All right.
417 00:17:07,026 00:17:08,528 (straining): All right. (straining): All right.
418 00:17:08,561 00:17:10,263 It's fine, it's fine. It's fine, it's fine.
419 00:17:10,297 00:17:12,232 It's fine! It's fine!
420 00:17:12,265 00:17:14,000 -All right. -(door rattling) -All right. -(door rattling)
421 00:17:14,033 00:17:16,869 And it's fucking locked. And it's fucking locked.
422 00:17:16,903 00:17:18,338 Goddamn it. Goddamn it.
423 00:17:18,371 00:17:20,507 Oh, shit. Oh, shit.
424 00:17:20,540 00:17:23,610 Ah, fuck this. Ah, fuck this.
425 00:17:23,643 00:17:26,413 (sighing): Oh, Deerlaken. (sighing): Oh, Deerlaken.
426 00:17:26,446 00:17:28,248 Love it. Love it.
427 00:17:31,118 00:17:33,286 (bed creaks) (bed creaks)
428 00:17:36,756 00:17:39,226 (sighs): Okay. (sighs): Okay.
429 00:17:39,259 00:17:41,428 DAVE (over phone): Everything all right? DAVE (over phone): Everything all right?
430 00:17:41,461 00:17:43,896 Uh, hel... Yes? Hello? Uh, hel... Yes? Hello?
431 00:17:43,930 00:17:45,532 -It's Dave. -Yes? -It's Dave. -Yes?
432 00:17:45,565 00:17:46,966 From the Hofbrau House. From the Hofbrau House.
433 00:17:46,999 00:17:49,269 -From downstairs? -Yes. -From downstairs? -Yes.
434 00:17:49,302 00:17:51,138 -O-Okay. -Everything all right? -O-Okay. -Everything all right?
435 00:17:51,171 00:17:54,807 Mm... yeah, I was just looking for a Wi-Fi password. Mm... yeah, I was just looking for a Wi-Fi password.
436 00:17:54,841 00:17:56,476 Good luck. Good luck.
437 00:17:56,509 00:17:58,145 Case-sensitive? Case-sensitive?
438 00:17:58,178 00:18:00,447 No, good luck getting Wi-Fi. No, good luck getting Wi-Fi.
439 00:18:00,480 00:18:02,315 You're better off using your phone. You're better off using your phone.
440 00:18:02,349 00:18:04,384 -Okay. -Okay. -Okay. -Okay.
441 00:18:04,417 00:18:05,818 All right, very good. All right, very good.
442 00:18:05,852 00:18:08,054 -Thank you. -Sure. -Thank you. -Sure.
443 00:18:08,087 00:18:10,690 -Goodbye. -Night, Gar. -Goodbye. -Night, Gar.
444 00:18:12,792 00:18:14,294 (hangs up phone) (hangs up phone)
445 00:18:18,165 00:18:20,133 (sighs) (sighs)
446 00:18:30,177 00:18:31,611 DAVE: Everything all right? DAVE: Everything all right?
447 00:18:34,447 00:18:36,683 (chuckles quietly) (chuckles quietly)
448 00:18:47,227 00:18:49,061 MAN: Hey, D.C. Gary! MAN: Hey, D.C. Gary!
449 00:18:50,530 00:18:52,932 Hey, Gary. Hey, Gary.
450 00:18:52,965 00:18:54,234 Hey. Hey.
451 00:18:55,302 00:18:56,669 Good morning, Gary. Good morning, Gary.
452 00:18:56,703 00:18:58,605 Hey. Hey.
453 00:18:58,638 00:19:00,573 Okay. Okay.
454 00:19:03,676 00:19:05,845 -(gasps) Excuse me, Gary. -Hi, Gary. -(gasps) Excuse me, Gary. -Hi, Gary.
455 00:19:05,878 00:19:08,248 (panting): All right. (panting): All right.
456 00:19:11,050 00:19:12,719 ANN: Well, hello, Gary. ANN: Well, hello, Gary.
457 00:19:14,221 00:19:16,022 The Mikes told me that you're up from D.C., The Mikes told me that you're up from D.C.,
458 00:19:16,055 00:19:17,857 and I figured that you might be on the hunt and I figured that you might be on the hunt
459 00:19:17,890 00:19:19,459 for some good caffeine. (chuckles) for some good caffeine. (chuckles)
460 00:19:19,492 00:19:21,961 Yes. Um... sure. Yes. Um... sure.
461 00:19:21,994 00:19:23,363 May I have a... May I have a...
462 00:19:23,396 00:19:25,565 -Coffee? -A coffee. -Coffee? -A coffee.
463 00:19:25,598 00:19:26,733 Cream, two sugars. Cream, two sugars.
464 00:19:26,766 00:19:29,135 Not how I like it, but good. Not how I like it, but good.
465 00:19:29,168 00:19:30,370 And i-if you don't mind, um, And i-if you don't mind, um,
466 00:19:30,403 00:19:32,339 when you head up to Jack's, can you give him this? when you head up to Jack's, can you give him this?
467 00:19:32,372 00:19:33,873 Jack, uh, he gets a little cranky Jack, uh, he gets a little cranky
468 00:19:33,906 00:19:35,242 if he doesn't get his linzers. if he doesn't get his linzers.
469 00:19:35,275 00:19:37,377 (laughs) Oh, and I-I, uh... (laughs) Oh, and I-I, uh...
470 00:19:37,410 00:19:40,213 I put a little streusel in there for you, too. I put a little streusel in there for you, too.
471 00:19:40,247 00:19:42,282 Just made it. Still warm. Just made it. Still warm.
472 00:19:44,183 00:19:46,018 Mmm. Okay. Mmm. Okay.
473 00:19:46,052 00:19:48,054 Ah, no, no, no, no, no. Ah, no, no, no, no, no.
474 00:19:48,087 00:19:49,556 You're saving me a trip, so... You're saving me a trip, so...
475 00:19:51,591 00:19:53,660 -(laughing): Okay. -(Ann laughs) -(laughing): Okay. -(Ann laughs)
476 00:19:53,693 00:19:55,695 Um, okay. Um, okay.
477 00:19:55,728 00:19:57,264 (chuckles) Okay. (chuckles) Okay.
478 00:19:59,031 00:20:00,767 Bye, Gary. Bye, Gary.
479 00:20:00,800 00:20:02,835 (laughing): Okay. Bye. (laughing): Okay. Bye.
480 00:20:02,869 00:20:04,437 ANN: Have a good one. ANN: Have a good one.
481 00:20:04,471 00:20:07,374 GARY (laughing): Thank you. You have a good one. GARY (laughing): Thank you. You have a good one.
482 00:20:07,407 00:20:09,742 Hey, guys. Have a good one. Hey, guys. Have a good one.
483 00:20:09,776 00:20:12,512 -Hey, lady. Have a good one. -(woman chuckles) -Hey, lady. Have a good one. -(woman chuckles)
484 00:20:12,545 00:20:15,214 All right. Is everybody having a good one? All right. Is everybody having a good one?
485 00:20:15,248 00:20:17,584 What the fuck? What the fuck?
486 00:20:21,621 00:20:24,223 (bag rustling) (bag rustling)
487 00:20:28,428 00:20:30,397 Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
488 00:20:30,430 00:20:32,399 Oh, fuck! Oh, fuck!
489 00:20:41,274 00:20:42,742 Oh! Oh!
490 00:20:42,775 00:20:44,210 Fuck me! Fuck me!
491 00:20:44,243 00:20:45,878 Oh, God. Oh, God.
492 00:20:45,912 00:20:48,315 (grunts, moans) (grunts, moans)
493 00:20:50,917 00:20:52,985 Mmm, mmm. Mmm, mmm.
494 00:20:53,019 00:20:54,354 Mmm. Mmm.
495 00:21:04,364 00:21:06,232 (grunts) (grunts)
496 00:21:06,265 00:21:07,767 Mmm. Mmm.
497 00:21:07,800 00:21:09,602 (grunts) (grunts)
498 00:21:12,972 00:21:15,575 (vehicle door opens, closes) (vehicle door opens, closes)
499 00:21:15,608 00:21:17,109 (horn beeps) (horn beeps)
500 00:21:23,616 00:21:26,819 -(dogs barking) -Shit! God! God! -(dogs barking) -Shit! God! God!
501 00:21:26,853 00:21:29,489 (grunting) (grunting)
502 00:21:30,890 00:21:33,760 JACK: Sunny! Muffin! Stand down! JACK: Sunny! Muffin! Stand down!
503 00:21:33,793 00:21:36,128 Oh, hey. Oh, hey.
504 00:21:36,162 00:21:39,031 You Ann's new delivery guy? You Ann's new delivery guy?
505 00:21:39,065 00:21:40,667 (panting): I'm sorry. (panting): I'm sorry.
506 00:21:40,700 00:21:42,769 Uh, I'll go back and get you some more of those. Uh, I'll go back and get you some more of those.
507 00:21:42,802 00:21:44,471 Oh, it's fine. I'll probably end up Oh, it's fine. I'll probably end up
508 00:21:44,504 00:21:46,473 giving them most of them anyway. giving them most of them anyway.
509 00:21:46,506 00:21:48,675 (chuckling) (chuckling)
510 00:21:48,708 00:21:50,877 Um ... okay. Um ... okay.
511 00:21:50,910 00:21:52,211 Okay. (sighs) Okay. (sighs)
512 00:21:52,244 00:21:54,347 That's an angry labradoodle. That's an angry labradoodle.
513 00:21:55,382 00:21:58,618 Oh, really beautiful out here. Oh, really beautiful out here.
514 00:21:58,651 00:22:00,787 Really takes me back. Really takes me back.
515 00:22:00,820 00:22:02,689 Oh, you a farm boy? Oh, you a farm boy?
516 00:22:02,722 00:22:04,691 Uh, uh, no. Uh, uh, no.
517 00:22:04,724 00:22:06,959 Political consultant. Political consultant.
518 00:22:06,993 00:22:08,395 -(hollers) -(mooing) -(hollers) -(mooing)
519 00:22:08,428 00:22:10,863 Well, sir, I saw your video on the Internet-- Well, sir, I saw your video on the Internet--
520 00:22:10,897 00:22:12,499 the town hall you busted up. the town hall you busted up.
521 00:22:12,532 00:22:14,534 -(hollers) -Um... -(hollers) -Um...
522 00:22:14,567 00:22:16,135 your comments on the responsibility your comments on the responsibility
523 00:22:16,168 00:22:18,237 to the least of us moved me deeply. to the least of us moved me deeply.
524 00:22:18,270 00:22:20,740 -Grab a bucket. -And I'll grab a bucket. -Grab a bucket. -And I'll grab a bucket.
525 00:22:20,773 00:22:22,742 And here they come. Okay. And here they come. Okay.
526 00:22:22,775 00:22:24,544 -I think, increasingly... -(hollers) -I think, increasingly... -(hollers)
527 00:22:24,577 00:22:27,747 ...we have lost the capacity to see each other. ...we have lost the capacity to see each other.
528 00:22:27,780 00:22:31,584 Empathy for those that we don't resemble. Empathy for those that we don't resemble.
529 00:22:31,618 00:22:33,319 Not to say partisanship has no place, Not to say partisanship has no place,
530 00:22:33,352 00:22:36,022 but certainly not at the level of toxicity but certainly not at the level of toxicity
531 00:22:36,055 00:22:38,290 that our current debate incorporates. that our current debate incorporates.
532 00:22:40,059 00:22:43,563 "No man left behind" is your ethos as a Marine! "No man left behind" is your ethos as a Marine!
533 00:22:43,596 00:22:46,699 I think it's especially poignant this day and age! I think it's especially poignant this day and age!
534 00:22:46,733 00:22:49,268 Your words spoke to values, not identity. Your words spoke to values, not identity.
535 00:22:49,301 00:22:51,070 So important. So important.
536 00:22:59,479 00:23:01,481 (squishing) (squishing)
537 00:23:02,715 00:23:04,951 (groans) (groans)
538 00:23:04,984 00:23:08,220 (grunts, exhales heavily) (grunts, exhales heavily)
539 00:23:09,321 00:23:10,957 (groans) (groans)
540 00:23:10,990 00:23:12,759 It was Abraham Lincoln who said, It was Abraham Lincoln who said,
541 00:23:12,792 00:23:14,627 "An appeal to our better angels." "An appeal to our better angels."
542 00:23:14,661 00:23:16,663 (toilet flushes) (toilet flushes)
543 00:23:23,135 00:23:24,971 You came out of there pretty fast. You came out of there pretty fast.
544 00:23:25,004 00:23:26,673 Did you wash? Did you wash?
545 00:23:35,482 00:23:38,250 (Gary takes deep breath) (Gary takes deep breath)
546 00:23:41,588 00:23:42,955 Okay. Okay.
547 00:23:42,989 00:23:45,458 Here it is. Here it is.
548 00:23:45,492 00:23:48,127 I want you to be the Democratic candidate I want you to be the Democratic candidate
549 00:23:48,160 00:23:50,129 for mayor of Deerlaken. for mayor of Deerlaken.
550 00:23:51,964 00:23:54,433 Now, I know you probably don't think that you're a Democrat, Now, I know you probably don't think that you're a Democrat,
551 00:23:54,467 00:23:57,403 but after watching your speech, I can assure you that you are, but after watching your speech, I can assure you that you are,
552 00:23:57,436 00:23:59,839 and I would like to offer my company's services and I would like to offer my company's services
553 00:23:59,872 00:24:01,440 to help you do so. to help you do so.
554 00:24:08,548 00:24:11,417 Well, I thank you. Well, I thank you.
555 00:24:11,450 00:24:12,985 You're welcome. You're welcome.
556 00:24:13,019 00:24:14,921 You know, thanks for the help today. You know, thanks for the help today.
557 00:24:14,954 00:24:16,623 My pleasure. My pleasure.
558 00:24:16,656 00:24:20,092 But all things being equal, But all things being equal,
559 00:24:20,126 00:24:22,128 I'd rather not. I'd rather not.
560 00:24:25,464 00:24:27,834 All right. All right.
561 00:24:27,867 00:24:30,537 Can I be completely honest with you? Can I be completely honest with you?
562 00:24:30,570 00:24:31,971 No bullshit. No bullshit.
563 00:24:32,004 00:24:33,339 Be nice. Be nice.
564 00:24:33,372 00:24:35,007 My daughter's here. My daughter's here.
565 00:24:35,041 00:24:38,310 That was your daughter, with her-her arm up the c-cow? That was your daughter, with her-her arm up the c-cow?
566 00:24:38,344 00:24:40,046 Okay. Look... Okay. Look...
567 00:24:40,079 00:24:41,614 (Gary sighs) (Gary sighs)
568 00:24:41,648 00:24:44,684 -Democrats are getting their asses kicked. -Mm. -Democrats are getting their asses kicked. -Mm.
569 00:24:44,717 00:24:49,221 Because guys like me don't know how to talk to guys like you. Because guys like me don't know how to talk to guys like you.
570 00:24:49,255 00:24:52,158 I really believe that you believe what I believe-- I really believe that you believe what I believe--
571 00:24:52,191 00:24:55,227 that what is happening in this town is wrong. that what is happening in this town is wrong.
572 00:24:55,261 00:24:57,864 What is happening in this country is wrong. What is happening in this country is wrong.
573 00:24:57,897 00:24:59,832 People are turning their backs on each other. People are turning their backs on each other.
574 00:24:59,866 00:25:02,034 We are forgetting that we need each other. We are forgetting that we need each other.
575 00:25:02,068 00:25:03,903 What you said in your speech-- What you said in your speech--
576 00:25:03,936 00:25:05,572 strong as our weakest link. strong as our weakest link.
577 00:25:05,605 00:25:07,039 Do you mean that? Do you mean that?
578 00:25:07,073 00:25:08,808 Did you mean it when you said that? Did you mean it when you said that?
579 00:25:08,841 00:25:12,078 Because if you did, I think that you have an obligation Because if you did, I think that you have an obligation
580 00:25:12,111 00:25:14,380 to try to strengthen those weak links. to try to strengthen those weak links.
581 00:25:14,413 00:25:17,349 And you can do it. You can do it. And you can do it. You can do it.
582 00:25:17,383 00:25:19,518 You can do it in this sort of position. You can do it in this sort of position.
583 00:25:19,552 00:25:23,122 You can help strengthen those... those weak links. You can help strengthen those... those weak links.
584 00:25:25,524 00:25:27,526 You can achieve that. You can achieve that.
585 00:25:30,797 00:25:33,165 -Okay... -(taps desk) -Okay... -(taps desk)
586 00:25:33,199 00:25:34,567 All right. All right.
587 00:25:34,601 00:25:36,068 You know what? You know what?
588 00:25:37,236 00:25:39,038 (sighs) (sighs)
589 00:25:39,071 00:25:42,609 All due respect, Colonel, anybody can make a speech. All due respect, Colonel, anybody can make a speech.
590 00:25:42,642 00:25:44,577 The real test is backing up your words. The real test is backing up your words.
591 00:25:44,611 00:25:46,913 The things that you said to those folks in that meeting, The things that you said to those folks in that meeting,
592 00:25:46,946 00:25:50,216 was that principle, was that principle,
593 00:25:50,249 00:25:52,251 or was that just a hobby? or was that just a hobby?
594 00:25:54,253 00:25:55,855 Let me know. Let me know.
595 00:25:55,888 00:25:58,691 Why does he need three guns? Why does he need three guns?
596 00:25:58,725 00:26:00,727 (door opens) (door opens)
597 00:26:00,760 00:26:02,294 (door closes) (door closes)
598 00:26:21,347 00:26:23,249 (rooster crows in distance) (rooster crows in distance)
599 00:26:23,282 00:26:25,251 (gasps, groans) (gasps, groans)
600 00:26:25,284 00:26:27,253 -(groaning): Oh, God. -(laughs) -(groaning): Oh, God. -(laughs)
601 00:26:27,286 00:26:30,222 -Shit. -I'm sorry if I startled you, sunshine. -Shit. -I'm sorry if I startled you, sunshine.
602 00:26:30,256 00:26:31,624 (groans) (groans)
603 00:26:31,658 00:26:33,559 Don't you people believe in locks? Don't you people believe in locks?
604 00:26:33,592 00:26:37,163 Or privacy or basic social contracts? Or privacy or basic social contracts?
605 00:26:37,196 00:26:38,931 Yeah, Tonya let me in. Yeah, Tonya let me in.
606 00:26:38,965 00:26:41,300 I told her I had something important I told her I had something important
607 00:26:41,333 00:26:43,770 I needed to talk to you about. I needed to talk to you about.
608 00:26:45,772 00:26:47,473 You'll do it? You'll do it?
609 00:26:47,506 00:26:48,975 Under one condition. Under one condition.
610 00:26:49,008 00:26:50,643 Great. Name it. Great. Name it.
611 00:26:52,645 00:26:54,647 You run the damn thing. You run the damn thing.
612 00:26:54,681 00:26:56,148 I got the farm to worry about. I got the farm to worry about.
613 00:26:56,182 00:26:57,984 Don't have any idea how to even start. Don't have any idea how to even start.
614 00:26:58,017 00:27:00,820 I will have one of my top guys make himself available to you. I will have one of my top guys make himself available to you.
615 00:27:00,853 00:27:02,321 No, no, that's not gonna do it. No, no, that's not gonna do it.
616 00:27:02,354 00:27:04,691 You. You.
617 00:27:04,724 00:27:07,860 The deal is you run it from here. The deal is you run it from here.
618 00:27:07,894 00:27:09,762 I checked you out. I checked you out.
619 00:27:09,796 00:27:12,064 You got one hell of a portfolio. You got one hell of a portfolio.
620 00:27:14,233 00:27:17,069 So, deal? So, deal?
621 00:27:21,841 00:27:23,843 GARY: I'd like a big clump of the cows GARY: I'd like a big clump of the cows
622 00:27:23,876 00:27:25,878 right here in the center. right here in the center.
623 00:27:27,413 00:27:29,381 -Do you copy me? -Yes, sir! -Do you copy me? -Yes, sir!
624 00:27:29,415 00:27:32,184 Okay. If you can just move 'em over that way. Okay. If you can just move 'em over that way.
625 00:27:32,218 00:27:33,886 -Yep! -Okay! -Yep! -Okay!
626 00:27:33,920 00:27:36,388 And if you could get some of them to face front. And if you could get some of them to face front.
627 00:27:36,422 00:27:37,857 (under breath): Oh, my God. (under breath): Oh, my God.
628 00:27:37,890 00:27:40,159 Hey there, Colonel. Hey there, Colonel.
629 00:27:40,192 00:27:42,028 Gary. Gary.
630 00:27:42,061 00:27:45,197 Bobby, thanks a million for coming out here. Bobby, thanks a million for coming out here.
631 00:27:45,231 00:27:46,665 I'll be certain to vote for you. I'll be certain to vote for you.
632 00:27:46,699 00:27:48,500 Thank y'all, folks, for coming. Thank y'all, folks, for coming.
633 00:27:48,534 00:27:50,536 So, this is just a quick kickoff. So, this is just a quick kickoff.
634 00:27:50,569 00:27:53,305 Let's make you look a little more like Farmer Jack Let's make you look a little more like Farmer Jack
635 00:27:53,339 00:27:57,409 and less like Certified Public Accountant Jack. and less like Certified Public Accountant Jack.
636 00:27:57,443 00:27:59,645 -There you go. -Uh, okay. -There you go. -Uh, okay.
637 00:27:59,678 00:28:01,047 Oh... Oh...
638 00:28:01,080 00:28:02,214 -Oh, no, no. That's okay. -JACK: Quit it. -Oh, no, no. That's okay. -JACK: Quit it.
639 00:28:02,248 00:28:03,315 -That's okay. Donny, right? -Quit it. -That's okay. Donny, right? -Quit it.
640 00:28:03,349 00:28:04,550 Michael. Michael.
641 00:28:04,583 00:28:07,153 Michael, we can just boom him, okay? Michael, we can just boom him, okay?
642 00:28:07,186 00:28:08,487 The pole with the thing on the end. The pole with the thing on the end.
643 00:28:08,520 00:28:09,756 Do you do sound, Michael? Do you do sound, Michael?
644 00:28:09,789 00:28:11,190 -Chuck does sound. -Okay. -Chuck does sound. -Okay.
645 00:28:11,223 00:28:12,759 But he's at the lake with his family. But he's at the lake with his family.
646 00:28:12,792 00:28:14,193 Okay, well, that's too bad that he's not... Okay, well, that's too bad that he's not...
647 00:28:14,226 00:28:15,862 -Eh, that's okay. That's okay. We'll just go without. -No. -Eh, that's okay. That's okay. We'll just go without. -No.
648 00:28:15,895 00:28:17,696 -Thank you, Donny. -Thank you, son. Thank you. -Thank you, Donny. -Thank you, son. Thank you.
649 00:28:17,730 00:28:18,998 Okay. Okay.
650 00:28:19,031 00:28:20,332 Let's give it a try. Let's give it a try.
651 00:28:20,366 00:28:21,734 There you are. There you are.
652 00:28:21,768 00:28:23,535 Uh, this is... Uh, this is...
653 00:28:23,569 00:28:25,237 Why you are running for mayor. Why you are running for mayor.
654 00:28:26,272 00:28:27,439 Wow. Wow.
655 00:28:27,473 00:28:29,541 I quote Patton... I quote Patton...
656 00:28:29,575 00:28:30,877 and Jesus. and Jesus.
657 00:28:30,910 00:28:32,078 Paraphrase. Paraphrase.
658 00:28:32,111 00:28:34,446 And you can't go to the prom without a corsage. And you can't go to the prom without a corsage.
659 00:28:34,480 00:28:36,415 (cows mooing) (cows mooing)
660 00:28:36,448 00:28:38,384 Let's make magic. Let's make magic.
661 00:28:38,417 00:28:41,120 All right. Thank you for coming. All right. Thank you for coming.
662 00:28:41,153 00:28:43,122 Could we quiet the cows, please?! Could we quiet the cows, please?!
663 00:28:43,155 00:28:45,024 Thank you! Thank you!
664 00:28:45,057 00:28:47,894 Ladies and gentlemen, Colonel Jack Hastings. Ladies and gentlemen, Colonel Jack Hastings.
665 00:28:52,098 00:28:54,066 So, uh, So, uh,
666 00:28:54,100 00:28:57,469 I am Colonel Jack Hastings, and... I am Colonel Jack Hastings, and...
667 00:28:57,503 00:29:00,339 I'm running for mayor. I'm running for mayor.
668 00:29:04,777 00:29:07,279 So, uh... So, uh...
669 00:29:07,313 00:29:10,049 How we doing? How we doing?
670 00:29:10,082 00:29:12,618 All right. Beautifully put. All right. Beautifully put.
671 00:29:13,853 00:29:15,621 Are there any questions for the Colonel? Are there any questions for the Colonel?
672 00:29:15,654 00:29:17,089 Anyone? Anyone?
673 00:29:18,791 00:29:20,759 Bueller? Bueller?
674 00:29:20,793 00:29:22,428 Uh, yes, Colonel. Uh, yes, Colonel.
675 00:29:22,461 00:29:24,096 Yes, name and affiliation, please. Yes, name and affiliation, please.
676 00:29:24,130 00:29:26,632 -It's Dan. -Name and affiliation, please. -It's Dan. -Name and affiliation, please.
677 00:29:26,665 00:29:28,467 I'm Dan. I'm Dan.
678 00:29:28,500 00:29:30,069 Go ahead, Daniel. Go ahead, Daniel.
679 00:29:30,102 00:29:31,470 Easy on the cows! Easy on the cows!
680 00:29:31,503 00:29:33,639 Um, yes, Mr. Hastings, uh, Colonel, Um, yes, Mr. Hastings, uh, Colonel,
681 00:29:33,672 00:29:35,074 could you say that again? could you say that again?
682 00:29:35,107 00:29:37,276 Because I-I don't think my recorder was on. Because I-I don't think my recorder was on.
683 00:29:39,145 00:29:40,947 Mm. Do it again? Mm. Do it again?
684 00:29:40,980 00:29:42,514 GARY: Hey, you know what? GARY: Hey, you know what?
685 00:29:42,548 00:29:43,782 It's okay. It's okay.
686 00:29:43,816 00:29:45,017 -GARY: Now... -We'll get it. -GARY: Now... -We'll get it.
687 00:29:45,051 00:29:47,119 GARY: Okay, this one... GARY: Okay, this one...
688 00:29:47,153 00:29:49,321 What I'm looking for-- What I'm looking for--
689 00:29:49,355 00:29:52,191 don't put all the black ones in the center. don't put all the black ones in the center.
690 00:29:52,224 00:29:55,094 He's running as a moderate, okay? He's running as a moderate, okay?
691 00:29:55,127 00:29:57,329 And if you could get some facing this way, And if you could get some facing this way,
692 00:29:57,363 00:29:58,865 that would be helpful. that would be helpful.
693 00:29:58,898 00:30:00,799 More local news tonight out of Deerlaken. More local news tonight out of Deerlaken.
694 00:30:00,833 00:30:02,268 Former Marine Colonel Jack Hastings Former Marine Colonel Jack Hastings
695 00:30:02,301 00:30:04,470 announcing today that he's running for mayor announcing today that he's running for mayor
696 00:30:04,503 00:30:06,005 as a Democrat. as a Democrat.
697 00:30:06,038 00:30:07,940 While Braun may have an incumbent's advantage, While Braun may have an incumbent's advantage,
698 00:30:07,974 00:30:09,375 political insiders say Hastings political insiders say Hastings
699 00:30:09,408 00:30:11,443 is likely to give him a run for his money. is likely to give him a run for his money.
700 00:30:11,477 00:30:12,845 Happening now, a major... Happening now, a major...
701 00:30:12,879 00:30:15,614 JACK: Well, how much is this gonna cost? JACK: Well, how much is this gonna cost?
702 00:30:15,647 00:30:17,884 GARY: You let me worry about that. GARY: You let me worry about that.
703 00:30:17,917 00:30:19,952 What I need from you are people, volunteers. What I need from you are people, volunteers.
704 00:30:19,986 00:30:21,453 We got a lot of legwork We got a lot of legwork
705 00:30:21,487 00:30:23,722 if we're gonna make a noise in this thing. if we're gonna make a noise in this thing.
706 00:30:23,755 00:30:25,391 -More coffee? -Oh, I'm good. -More coffee? -Oh, I'm good.
707 00:30:25,424 00:30:27,126 No, I'm good, Lizzie. Thanks. No, I'm good, Lizzie. Thanks.
708 00:30:27,159 00:30:28,827 You know what I do need? You know what I do need?
709 00:30:28,861 00:30:31,563 I need a couple buckets of that gravy I need a couple buckets of that gravy
710 00:30:31,597 00:30:33,933 so I can take a bath in it. so I can take a bath in it.
711 00:30:35,001 00:30:37,203 So good. So good.
712 00:30:37,236 00:30:38,370 Delicious. Delicious.
713 00:30:38,404 00:30:39,872 (takes deep breath) (takes deep breath)
714 00:30:39,906 00:30:42,141 My compliments to the chef. My compliments to the chef.
715 00:30:42,174 00:30:43,209 I'll let Ziggy know. I'll let Ziggy know.
716 00:30:43,242 00:30:44,476 Great. Great.
717 00:30:44,510 00:30:45,811 That ought to cheer him up. That ought to cheer him up.
718 00:30:45,844 00:30:48,180 JACK: Just the check, Lizzie. JACK: Just the check, Lizzie.
719 00:30:48,214 00:30:50,182 Will do, Jack. Will do, Jack.
720 00:30:50,216 00:30:53,019 GARY: What's the deal with the happy chef? GARY: What's the deal with the happy chef?
721 00:30:53,052 00:30:55,021 JACK: Oh, Ziggy's all right. JACK: Oh, Ziggy's all right.
722 00:30:55,054 00:30:57,023 -Oh? -He owns the place. -Oh? -He owns the place.
723 00:30:57,056 00:30:59,558 Eh, he may be a bit peeved about the election thing. Eh, he may be a bit peeved about the election thing.
724 00:30:59,591 00:31:02,261 He's Mayor Braun's brother. He's Mayor Braun's brother.
725 00:31:02,294 00:31:05,397 Why isn't this place called Braun's? Why isn't this place called Braun's?
726 00:31:05,431 00:31:10,436 The Hansens owned this place since probably... Korea. The Hansens owned this place since probably... Korea.
727 00:31:10,469 00:31:13,339 Bobby Hansen started it, his kids ran it for years, Bobby Hansen started it, his kids ran it for years,
728 00:31:13,372 00:31:16,375 and had to sell once the base closed, and had to sell once the base closed,
729 00:31:16,408 00:31:20,246 but no matter who owns it, it'll always be Hansen's. but no matter who owns it, it'll always be Hansen's.
730 00:31:20,279 00:31:23,182 Base closing really hammered this place. Base closing really hammered this place.
731 00:31:23,215 00:31:24,951 Yeah, it did. Yeah, it did.
732 00:31:24,984 00:31:28,020 More than half of our storefronts have shut down. More than half of our storefronts have shut down.
733 00:31:28,054 00:31:29,788 In fact, we're losing our high school In fact, we're losing our high school
734 00:31:29,821 00:31:31,924 if we can't come up with the funding. if we can't come up with the funding.
735 00:31:31,958 00:31:36,428 But no matter what folks might wish for here, But no matter what folks might wish for here,
736 00:31:36,462 00:31:38,230 it ain't coming back. it ain't coming back.
737 00:31:38,264 00:31:40,432 "Vote for Jack Hastings, "Vote for Jack Hastings,
738 00:31:40,466 00:31:42,101 "'cause no matter what you wish for, "'cause no matter what you wish for,
739 00:31:42,134 00:31:44,636 -it ain't never coming back." -(chuckling) -it ain't never coming back." -(chuckling)
740 00:31:44,670 00:31:46,272 -I like it. It's good. -Well... -I like it. It's good. -Well...
741 00:31:46,305 00:31:48,640 -I'm not gonna lie to people. -No, I know. I know. -I'm not gonna lie to people. -No, I know. I know.
742 00:31:48,674 00:31:51,577 I was just being witty and cynical. I was just being witty and cynical.
743 00:31:51,610 00:31:54,080 Can't win a battle if you're not honest Can't win a battle if you're not honest
744 00:31:54,113 00:31:56,448 about what you're really up against. about what you're really up against.
745 00:31:56,482 00:31:58,050 No, you cannot. No, you cannot.
746 00:31:58,084 00:31:59,651 (footsteps approaching) (footsteps approaching)
747 00:31:59,685 00:32:01,988 LIZZIE: Not enough for a bath, LIZZIE: Not enough for a bath,
748 00:32:02,021 00:32:04,156 but you can get a good foot soak in. but you can get a good foot soak in.
749 00:32:05,924 00:32:06,993 GARY: Thank you. GARY: Thank you.
750 00:32:07,026 00:32:09,695 -A straw. -(chuckling) -A straw. -(chuckling)
751 00:32:11,697 00:32:13,099 -(claps) -GARY: All right, let's bring it in. -(claps) -GARY: All right, let's bring it in.
752 00:32:13,132 00:32:14,900 Everybody in. Ah... Everybody in. Ah...
753 00:32:14,933 00:32:16,802 -phone bank! -OTHERS: Phone bank. -phone bank! -OTHERS: Phone bank.
754 00:32:16,835 00:32:18,237 Well, you'll get it next time. Well, you'll get it next time.
755 00:32:18,270 00:32:20,006 Okay, I want you to be upbeat. Okay, I want you to be upbeat.
756 00:32:20,039 00:32:21,673 I want you to be positive. I want you to be positive.
757 00:32:21,707 00:32:24,176 Active participation is what we're looking for. Active participation is what we're looking for.
758 00:32:24,210 00:32:26,078 Would they volunteer? Would they donate? Would they volunteer? Would they donate?
759 00:32:26,112 00:32:27,946 Can we drop off a lawn sign? Can we drop off a lawn sign?
760 00:32:27,980 00:32:29,915 -Would they donate? -(laughs) -Would they donate? -(laughs)
761 00:32:29,948 00:32:31,650 Would they donate? Would they donate?
762 00:32:31,683 00:32:34,120 Yes, write that down. That's good. Yes, write that down. That's good.
763 00:32:34,153 00:32:36,288 Got some sample scripts for you there. Got some sample scripts for you there.
764 00:32:36,322 00:32:38,024 Contact list there. Contact list there.
765 00:32:38,057 00:32:39,558 To the ramparts! To the ramparts!
766 00:32:41,360 00:32:43,129 That means go. You can begin. That means go. You can begin.
767 00:32:43,162 00:32:44,830 -Oh. -Now... -Oh. -Now...
768 00:32:44,863 00:32:46,698 you guys are my "A" team. you guys are my "A" team.
769 00:32:46,732 00:32:49,201 So, first, we're going to take these lawn signs, So, first, we're going to take these lawn signs,
770 00:32:49,235 00:32:52,104 and we're going to put them in all available public spaces. and we're going to put them in all available public spaces.
771 00:32:52,138 00:32:54,140 I want them visible but not obnoxiously so. I want them visible but not obnoxiously so.
772 00:32:54,173 00:32:57,343 Isn't it a little early for lawn signs? Isn't it a little early for lawn signs?
773 00:32:59,145 00:33:01,047 DIANA: I'm sorry. She just, um... DIANA: I'm sorry. She just, um...
774 00:33:01,080 00:33:02,448 'Cause just around here, 'Cause just around here,
775 00:33:02,481 00:33:04,183 sometimes people aren't so keen... sometimes people aren't so keen...
776 00:33:04,216 00:33:06,518 -Mm-hmm. -But then, I do appreciate -Mm-hmm. -But then, I do appreciate
777 00:33:06,552 00:33:08,287 that you got the signs made. that you got the signs made.
778 00:33:08,320 00:33:10,156 -Mm-hmm. -GARY: I mean, we've always used lawn signs. -Mm-hmm. -GARY: I mean, we've always used lawn signs.
779 00:33:10,189 00:33:12,358 -Yeah. -They've worked for hundreds of years, so... -Yeah. -They've worked for hundreds of years, so...
780 00:33:12,391 00:33:14,060 -Great. -Yeah, let's just use 'em. -Great. -Yeah, let's just use 'em.
781 00:33:14,093 00:33:16,062 Great. All right, Ann? Great. All right, Ann?
782 00:33:16,095 00:33:18,064 -Hmm? Okay. -I want you to take the downtown area. -Hmm? Okay. -I want you to take the downtown area.
783 00:33:18,097 00:33:20,566 Martha, Dave, how about everything west of 39? Martha, Dave, how about everything west of 39?
784 00:33:20,599 00:33:22,634 -(phones ringing) -And, Diana, I'd like you to stay here... -(phones ringing) -And, Diana, I'd like you to stay here...
785 00:33:22,668 00:33:24,170 -Hello? -MAN: Yeah? -Hello? -MAN: Yeah?
786 00:33:24,203 00:33:25,804 -...to do... -Good morning. -...to do... -Good morning.
787 00:33:25,837 00:33:27,473 Hi. This is Matthew, and I'm a volunteer Hi. This is Matthew, and I'm a volunteer
788 00:33:27,506 00:33:28,707 -calling with Jack... -WOMAN: Matthew? -calling with Jack... -WOMAN: Matthew?
789 00:33:28,740 00:33:29,875 -Matt... Matthew... -Hello? -Matt... Matthew... -Hello?
790 00:33:29,908 00:33:31,643 -Hello? -(overlapping chatter) -Hello? -(overlapping chatter)
791 00:33:31,677 00:33:33,245 -What are you doing? -(laughter) -What are you doing? -(laughter)
792 00:33:33,279 00:33:35,347 -Room. -MICHAEL: Good morning, Mr. Zimmer. -Room. -MICHAEL: Good morning, Mr. Zimmer.
793 00:33:35,381 00:33:37,916 My name is Michael, calling on behalf of Colonel Hastings. My name is Michael, calling on behalf of Colonel Hastings.
794 00:33:37,949 00:33:40,219 Guys, guys, guys, guys. Guys, guys, guys, guys.
795 00:33:40,252 00:33:41,720 All right, this is what's happening here. All right, this is what's happening here.
796 00:33:41,753 00:33:43,989 You're calling off the office contact list. You're calling off the office contact list.
797 00:33:44,022 00:33:45,557 This is the voter contact list. This is the voter contact list.
798 00:33:45,591 00:33:47,559 -Oh. -(laughter) -GARY: So, yeah, I know. -Oh. -(laughter) -GARY: So, yeah, I know.
799 00:33:47,593 00:33:50,362 I want you to call the voter contact list. I want you to call the voter contact list.
800 00:33:50,396 00:33:51,997 We're already voting for the Colonel. We're already voting for the Colonel.
801 00:33:52,030 00:33:53,565 Okay? Good. Okay? Good.
802 00:33:53,599 00:33:55,267 Let's go do the signs, too. Let's go do the signs, too.
803 00:33:55,301 00:33:56,768 -(indistinct chatter) -GARY: Oh, my God. -(indistinct chatter) -GARY: Oh, my God.
804 00:33:56,802 00:33:59,037 Keep doing that, guys. Keep doing that, guys.
805 00:33:59,071 00:34:01,073 (gas pump sputtering, meter dinging steadily) (gas pump sputtering, meter dinging steadily)
806 00:34:06,778 00:34:09,281 Gar! Hey, D.C. Gary! Gar! Hey, D.C. Gary!
807 00:34:09,315 00:34:12,284 -Hi. -Hey, Gar, come on over. -Hi. -Hey, Gar, come on over.
808 00:34:12,318 00:34:14,553 Okay. All right. Okay. All right.
809 00:34:14,586 00:34:16,222 -Nothing, nothing, nothing. -(others muttering) -Nothing, nothing, nothing. -(others muttering)
810 00:34:16,255 00:34:17,889 Uh, that's a six. That is a five. Uh, that's a six. That is a five.
811 00:34:17,923 00:34:19,191 And a four. Look at that. And a four. Look at that.
812 00:34:19,225 00:34:20,526 -And a seven. -Oh, my... Oh! -And a seven. -Oh, my... Oh!
813 00:34:20,559 00:34:22,261 -(bangs table) -I'm keeping it, baby! -(bangs table) -I'm keeping it, baby!
814 00:34:22,294 00:34:24,363 -Ah! -Hey, everybody. -Ah! -Hey, everybody.
815 00:34:24,396 00:34:25,964 -Hey. -This is D.C. Gary. -Hey. -This is D.C. Gary.
816 00:34:25,997 00:34:28,234 He's staying above the Hofbrau. He's staying above the Hofbrau.
817 00:34:28,267 00:34:29,568 -Hey. -GARY: Good to see you. -Hey. -GARY: Good to see you.
818 00:34:29,601 00:34:30,569 Welcome to The Ambassador's Lounge. Welcome to The Ambassador's Lounge.
819 00:34:30,602 00:34:31,970 Thank you very much. Thank you very much.
820 00:34:32,003 00:34:33,372 Hear you're in town helping the Colonel. Hear you're in town helping the Colonel.
821 00:34:33,405 00:34:34,940 -Yes, I am. -He's a good man. -Yes, I am. -He's a good man.
822 00:34:34,973 00:34:36,642 He is. He is a good man. He is. He is a good man.
823 00:34:36,675 00:34:39,211 So, is this your campaign office here? So, is this your campaign office here?
824 00:34:39,245 00:34:41,280 -(laughter) -This? -(laughter) -This?
825 00:34:41,313 00:34:43,449 No, this is The Ambassador's Lounge, No, this is The Ambassador's Lounge,
826 00:34:43,482 00:34:47,119 an elite, uh, social club of the area's top entrepreneurs, an elite, uh, social club of the area's top entrepreneurs,
827 00:34:47,153 00:34:49,621 -athletes and raconteurs. -Ah. -athletes and raconteurs. -Ah.
828 00:34:49,655 00:34:51,257 -It's a shithole. -(laughter) -It's a shithole. -(laughter)
829 00:34:51,290 00:34:52,558 BIG MIKE: Hey, guys. BIG MIKE: Hey, guys.
830 00:34:52,591 00:34:54,660 Jack's already got lawn signs printed up. (chuckles) Jack's already got lawn signs printed up. (chuckles)
831 00:34:58,697 00:35:01,099 Well, I got to head out. Well, I got to head out.
832 00:35:01,133 00:35:03,001 Got a lot of work to catch up on. Got a lot of work to catch up on.
833 00:35:03,034 00:35:04,436 Pleasure meeting everybody. Pleasure meeting everybody.
834 00:35:04,470 00:35:06,272 BRAUN: Hey, Father, you want to go with him? BRAUN: Hey, Father, you want to go with him?
835 00:35:06,305 00:35:07,739 He might need a miracle or two. He might need a miracle or two.
836 00:35:07,773 00:35:09,641 This town hasn't had a Democrat mayor This town hasn't had a Democrat mayor
837 00:35:09,675 00:35:11,843 since La Follette ruled these parts, and... since La Follette ruled these parts, and...
838 00:35:11,877 00:35:14,513 hasn't had a Democratic Party since the '70s. hasn't had a Democratic Party since the '70s.
839 00:35:14,546 00:35:15,981 -(laughter) -Gonna take a little bit more -(laughter) -Gonna take a little bit more
840 00:35:16,014 00:35:17,783 than lawn signs. than lawn signs.
841 00:35:18,884 00:35:20,452 Okay. Okay.
842 00:35:22,621 00:35:24,022 (bell dings) (bell dings)
843 00:35:28,227 00:35:30,429 NARRATOR: Colonel Jack Hastings. NARRATOR: Colonel Jack Hastings.
844 00:35:30,462 00:35:32,130 Tempered by war. Tempered by war.
845 00:35:32,164 00:35:35,133 Chain's only as strong as its weakest link. Chain's only as strong as its weakest link.
846 00:35:35,167 00:35:37,336 NARRATOR: Driven by faith. NARRATOR: Driven by faith.
847 00:35:37,369 00:35:39,471 I am my brother's keeper. I am my brother's keeper.
848 00:35:39,505 00:35:41,707 NARRATOR: A new kind of Democrat. NARRATOR: A new kind of Democrat.
849 00:35:41,740 00:35:44,443 A Democrat for the heartland. A Democrat for the heartland.
850 00:35:44,476 00:35:48,046 Jack Hastings, a redder kind of blue. Jack Hastings, a redder kind of blue.
851 00:35:48,079 00:35:50,349 ANNOUNCER: Paid for by Real Americans for... ANNOUNCER: Paid for by Real Americans for...
852 00:35:50,382 00:35:53,018 FAITH: What are you up to, Zimmer? FAITH: What are you up to, Zimmer?
853 00:35:53,051 00:35:56,054 I am telling you guys, Jack could be the real deal, I am telling you guys, Jack could be the real deal,
854 00:35:56,087 00:35:57,623 on a national level. on a national level.
855 00:35:57,656 00:35:58,957 KURT (chuckles): On a national level? KURT (chuckles): On a national level?
856 00:35:58,990 00:36:01,860 It's like he's a cross between... It's like he's a cross between...
857 00:36:01,893 00:36:04,896 -MacArthur and elk jerky. -Wait, what? -MacArthur and elk jerky. -Wait, what?
858 00:36:04,930 00:36:07,333 And one of those machines that test grip strength. And one of those machines that test grip strength.
859 00:36:07,366 00:36:09,235 Sounds too good to be true. Sounds too good to be true.
860 00:36:09,268 00:36:11,036 GARY: Oh, my God. GARY: Oh, my God.
861 00:36:11,069 00:36:13,405 Semicolon. (laughs) Semicolon. (laughs)
862 00:36:13,439 00:36:15,574 She took the bait. She took the bait.
863 00:36:15,607 00:36:18,176 It's on here, boys. Game on. It's on here, boys. Game on.
864 00:36:21,179 00:36:22,881 -And let him be the star, you know? -Yeah. -And let him be the star, you know? -Yeah.
865 00:36:22,914 00:36:24,316 -(laughter) -Yep. -So... -(laughter) -Yep. -So...
866 00:36:24,350 00:36:27,185 GARY: * A little bit of Hastings all the time * GARY: * A little bit of Hastings all the time *
867 00:36:27,219 00:36:29,888 * We're gonna win election, yeah, yeah, yeah. * * We're gonna win election, yeah, yeah, yeah. *
868 00:36:29,921 00:36:32,258 -Oh, yeah. Oh, here I am. -(Diana chuckles) -Oh, yeah. Oh, here I am. -(Diana chuckles)
869 00:36:32,291 00:36:34,260 (chuckles): Yes. Hello, party people. (chuckles): Yes. Hello, party people.
870 00:36:34,293 00:36:37,195 Oh, 'tis a beautiful day to be alive Oh, 'tis a beautiful day to be alive
871 00:36:37,229 00:36:38,864 and on the vanguard of change. and on the vanguard of change.
872 00:36:38,897 00:36:40,899 Who wants something to eat? Who wants something to eat?
873 00:36:40,932 00:36:42,268 They're so delicious. They're so delicious.
874 00:36:45,203 00:36:47,172 Okay. Okay.
875 00:36:47,205 00:36:48,540 What's going on? What's going on?
876 00:36:48,574 00:36:50,542 Why all the long faces? Why all the long faces?
877 00:36:50,576 00:36:51,777 Did you not see it? Did you not see it?
878 00:36:51,810 00:36:54,246 The billboard. The billboard.
879 00:36:54,280 00:36:57,716 The one on Main with the giant "Vote for Mayor Braun"? The one on Main with the giant "Vote for Mayor Braun"?
880 00:36:57,749 00:36:59,217 -Yes. -What about it? -Yes. -What about it?
881 00:36:59,251 00:37:00,886 (scoffs) "What about it?" (scoffs) "What about it?"
882 00:37:00,919 00:37:02,754 That's the Macgregor Ford billboard. That's the Macgregor Ford billboard.
883 00:37:02,788 00:37:04,290 Okay. Okay.
884 00:37:04,323 00:37:05,857 Okay, so it's been the Macgregor Ford billboard Okay, so it's been the Macgregor Ford billboard
885 00:37:05,891 00:37:07,092 for probably 40 years. for probably 40 years.
886 00:37:07,125 00:37:08,560 God only knows how much it cost. God only knows how much it cost.
887 00:37:08,594 00:37:11,096 And it looks like Braun has taken over Jerry's old office And it looks like Braun has taken over Jerry's old office
888 00:37:11,129 00:37:12,698 as some sort of campaign headquarters. as some sort of campaign headquarters.
889 00:37:12,731 00:37:14,800 Wait a second. Wait a second. Hold on. Hold on. Wait a second. Wait a second. Hold on. Hold on.
890 00:37:14,833 00:37:17,303 Um, are you telling me that the mayor, Um, are you telling me that the mayor,
891 00:37:17,336 00:37:19,305 who's running for reelection, who's running for reelection,
892 00:37:19,338 00:37:23,375 has decided to advertise his campaign for mayor? has decided to advertise his campaign for mayor?
893 00:37:23,409 00:37:26,878 And he's doing it from a... campaign office? And he's doing it from a... campaign office?
894 00:37:26,912 00:37:29,281 Oh, my God! Oh, I... This is... Oh, my God! Oh, I... This is...
895 00:37:29,315 00:37:31,283 This is overwhelming to me. This is overwhelming to me.
896 00:37:31,317 00:37:32,584 (laughing): Oh, my God. (laughing): Oh, my God.
897 00:37:32,618 00:37:33,985 I don't... I... I don't... I...
898 00:37:34,019 00:37:35,053 What... (stammering) What... (stammering)
899 00:37:35,086 00:37:36,722 I have the vapors. I... I have the vapors. I...
900 00:37:36,755 00:37:37,789 I'm hyperventilating. I'm hyperventilating.
901 00:37:37,823 00:37:40,058 Why are these spoons just standing there? Why are these spoons just standing there?
902 00:37:40,091 00:37:41,460 You don't get it. You don't get it.
903 00:37:41,493 00:37:42,828 (laughing) (laughing)
904 00:37:42,861 00:37:44,596 -Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. -(laughs) -Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. -(laughs)
905 00:37:44,630 00:37:46,332 You don't get it. You don't get it.
906 00:37:46,365 00:37:48,400 Do you have any idea how much that costs? Do you have any idea how much that costs?
907 00:37:48,434 00:37:50,235 Well, that space is 3,800 square feet, Well, that space is 3,800 square feet,
908 00:37:50,268 00:37:52,771 and it runs for $20 a square foot yearly. and it runs for $20 a square foot yearly.
909 00:37:52,804 00:37:56,007 Prorated to two months is $7,600. Prorated to two months is $7,600.
910 00:37:56,041 00:37:59,110 The billboard, a little bit harder to decipher. The billboard, a little bit harder to decipher.
911 00:37:59,144 00:38:01,246 But I'd say, based on the location But I'd say, based on the location
912 00:38:01,279 00:38:04,483 and Mayor Braun's desperation, 8K all-in. and Mayor Braun's desperation, 8K all-in.
913 00:38:04,516 00:38:06,117 Design and printing included. Design and printing included.
914 00:38:06,151 00:38:08,520 I don't know, maybe something like that. I don't know, maybe something like that.
915 00:38:08,554 00:38:11,122 Well, there's no way that Braun's got that much money. Well, there's no way that Braun's got that much money.
916 00:38:11,156 00:38:14,159 Unless... this little campaign of ours Unless... this little campaign of ours
917 00:38:14,192 00:38:17,496 has caught the attention of the national Republican Party has caught the attention of the national Republican Party
918 00:38:17,529 00:38:20,466 and they are sending money and reinforcements. and they are sending money and reinforcements.
919 00:38:20,499 00:38:22,200 -(quiet gasping) -It's okay. -(quiet gasping) -It's okay.
920 00:38:22,233 00:38:25,136 It's exactly what we wanted to happen. It's exactly what we wanted to happen.
921 00:38:26,237 00:38:28,106 They are scared. They are scared.
922 00:38:28,139 00:38:30,476 On a national level, On a national level,
923 00:38:30,509 00:38:33,579 they are scared of Colonel Jack. they are scared of Colonel Jack.
924 00:38:35,313 00:38:37,783 So we have to plan our next move. So we have to plan our next move.
925 00:38:37,816 00:38:39,150 Come here. Come here.
926 00:38:40,352 00:38:41,820 Gather round. Gather round.
927 00:38:41,853 00:38:44,055 We're going to need... We're going to need...
928 00:38:44,089 00:38:46,658 something a little like... something a little like...
929 00:38:46,692 00:38:48,694 -that. -(others gasping) -that. -(others gasping)
930 00:38:50,095 00:38:51,897 -WOMAN (chuckling): Wow. -(quiet murmuring) -WOMAN (chuckling): Wow. -(quiet murmuring)
931 00:38:54,099 00:38:55,467 GARY: And you scroll down. GARY: And you scroll down.
932 00:38:55,501 00:38:57,335 DIANA: There's a "donate" button. DIANA: There's a "donate" button.
933 00:38:57,369 00:39:00,672 Well, the money be just one clicky away. Well, the money be just one clicky away.
934 00:39:00,706 00:39:03,575 And one clicky goes to where? And one clicky goes to where?
935 00:39:03,609 00:39:04,976 Our website. Our website.
936 00:39:05,010 00:39:07,413 (chuckling): Oh, we don't have a web... (chuckling): Oh, we don't have a web...
937 00:39:09,615 00:39:11,016 (chuckling): Oh, wow. (chuckling): Oh, wow.
938 00:39:11,049 00:39:13,485 -MAN: Awesome. -(laughter, murmuring) -MAN: Awesome. -(laughter, murmuring)
939 00:39:13,519 00:39:15,253 GARY: Good slogan, right? GARY: Good slogan, right?
940 00:39:15,286 00:39:17,155 You were one step ahead the whole time. You were one step ahead the whole time.
941 00:39:17,188 00:39:19,525 Well, three or four, but thank you very much. Well, three or four, but thank you very much.
942 00:39:19,558 00:39:20,859 I will take that. I will take that.
943 00:39:20,892 00:39:22,428 Oh, wow. Oh, wow.
944 00:39:38,644 00:39:40,646 (sighs) (sighs)
945 00:39:48,587 00:39:50,321 Mmm. Mmm.
946 00:39:51,957 00:39:53,959 Mmm. Mmm.
947 00:39:53,992 00:39:56,462 Know how I knew you were here? Know how I knew you were here?
948 00:39:56,495 00:39:58,497 Your pussy tingled. Your pussy tingled.
949 00:39:59,665 00:40:01,900 Semicolon on the billboard. Semicolon on the billboard.
950 00:40:01,933 00:40:05,036 Classic Faith Brewster over-punctuation. Classic Faith Brewster over-punctuation.
951 00:40:05,070 00:40:07,739 Look, Zim, y'all punched your ticket Look, Zim, y'all punched your ticket
952 00:40:07,773 00:40:11,777 on a changing demographic, and now whitey don't want you back. on a changing demographic, and now whitey don't want you back.
953 00:40:11,810 00:40:15,581 Okay, Jeb, exclamation point. Okay, Jeb, exclamation point.
954 00:40:15,614 00:40:17,649 Why are you here? Why are you here?
955 00:40:17,683 00:40:19,785 Because I enjoy demoralizing you. Because I enjoy demoralizing you.
956 00:40:19,818 00:40:22,253 Because crushing the last piece of hope in your eyes Because crushing the last piece of hope in your eyes
957 00:40:22,287 00:40:23,555 really gets me off. really gets me off.
958 00:40:23,589 00:40:25,591 (clicks tongue, inhales deeply) (clicks tongue, inhales deeply)
959 00:40:25,624 00:40:28,660 (sighing): You are a twisted fuck, Faith. (sighing): You are a twisted fuck, Faith.
960 00:40:28,694 00:40:30,929 And you don't know Jack. And you don't know Jack.
961 00:40:30,962 00:40:32,831 Please don't tell me that is Please don't tell me that is
962 00:40:32,864 00:40:35,501 the campaign slogan you came up with. the campaign slogan you came up with.
963 00:40:37,803 00:40:40,105 This guy, Zim, he's not the last Jedi, This guy, Zim, he's not the last Jedi,
964 00:40:40,138 00:40:42,007 and even if he were, I'd still crush him and even if he were, I'd still crush him
965 00:40:42,040 00:40:43,642 because that's what I do. because that's what I do.
966 00:40:43,675 00:40:45,611 You realize, in that analogy, you're Darth Vader. You realize, in that analogy, you're Darth Vader.
967 00:40:45,644 00:40:47,613 -Whatever you say, nerd. -(chuckles) -Whatever you say, nerd. -(chuckles)
968 00:40:47,646 00:40:49,114 -It's good to see you. -Yeah. -It's good to see you. -Yeah.
969 00:40:49,147 00:40:50,982 -You look fat. -(laughs) -You look fat. -(laughs)
970 00:40:54,352 00:40:56,154 FAITH: Hmm. FAITH: Hmm.
971 00:40:56,187 00:40:57,589 Divine, Ann. Divine, Ann.
972 00:40:57,623 00:41:00,125 -You have to tell me your secret sometime. -Mm. -You have to tell me your secret sometime. -Mm.
973 00:41:02,994 00:41:04,563 I would never tell you. I would never tell you.
974 00:41:05,631 00:41:07,633 I'll never tell her. I'll never tell her.
975 00:41:07,666 00:41:09,868 -Cream, two sugars. (laughs) -Oh. -Cream, two sugars. (laughs) -Oh.
976 00:41:09,901 00:41:12,037 -No, that's not how I take it. -I know, but... -No, that's not how I take it. -I know, but...
977 00:41:12,070 00:41:13,805 Um, and here-here's some streusel I made for you, Um, and here-here's some streusel I made for you,
978 00:41:13,839 00:41:15,541 -and, um, it's still warm. -No, no, no, no, Ann, I can't. -and, um, it's still warm. -No, no, no, no, Ann, I can't.
979 00:41:15,574 00:41:17,142 -And then these are cookies I made for you. -I can't. -And then these are cookies I made for you. -I can't.
980 00:41:17,175 00:41:18,376 -I'm getting fat. I can't do that. -They're... -I'm getting fat. I can't do that. -They're...
981 00:41:18,409 00:41:19,477 -They're called the Garys, though. -Thank you. -They're called the Garys, though. -Thank you.
982 00:41:19,511 00:41:20,712 -I made these... -I know. I appreciate it. -I made these... -I know. I appreciate it.
983 00:41:20,746 00:41:21,713 -Thank you. Okay. -Yeah. Okay. -Thank you. Okay. -Yeah. Okay.
984 00:41:21,747 00:41:22,814 -Okay, bye-bye. -All right, then. -Okay, bye-bye. -All right, then.
985 00:41:22,848 00:41:23,849 Thank you. All right, then. Thank you. All right, then.
986 00:41:23,882 00:41:25,150 -Bye-bye. Have a good day. -Okay. -Bye-bye. Have a good day. -Okay.
987 00:41:25,183 00:41:27,018 -Up all night for nothing. -(door closes, opens) -Up all night for nothing. -(door closes, opens)
988 00:41:27,052 00:41:28,720 -Coming back. There you go. -All right, just today. -Coming back. There you go. -All right, just today.
989 00:41:28,754 00:41:30,188 -Okay. (laughs) -Yeah. Thank you. -Okay. (laughs) -Yeah. Thank you.
990 00:41:30,221 00:41:31,523 Bye-bye, now. Bye-bye. Bye-bye, now. Bye-bye.
991 00:41:31,557 00:41:32,958 Bye, Gar. Bye, Gar.
992 00:41:32,991 00:41:34,626 (door closes) (door closes)
993 00:41:34,660 00:41:36,194 GARY: Have a good one. GARY: Have a good one.
994 00:41:36,227 00:41:38,329 (sighs) (sighs)
995 00:41:48,840 00:41:50,742 (closes drawer) (closes drawer)
996 00:41:52,844 00:41:55,080 -Okay, good night. -GARY: Oh, hey. -Okay, good night. -GARY: Oh, hey.
997 00:41:55,113 00:41:57,182 Good night. I didn't know anybody else was here. Good night. I didn't know anybody else was here.
998 00:41:57,215 00:41:58,483 I just wanted to make sure I just wanted to make sure
999 00:41:58,516 00:42:00,218 everything was set for tomorrow. everything was set for tomorrow.
1000 00:42:00,251 00:42:02,554 I was just finishing up these pamphlets on immigration. I was just finishing up these pamphlets on immigration.
1001 00:42:02,588 00:42:03,922 Ooh. (chuckles) Ooh. (chuckles)
1002 00:42:03,955 00:42:05,557 That sounds complicated. That sounds complicated.
1003 00:42:05,591 00:42:07,192 I hope the small minds can manage. I hope the small minds can manage.
1004 00:42:08,860 00:42:10,596 (sighs) I'm sorry about that. (sighs) I'm sorry about that.
1005 00:42:10,629 00:42:13,331 Sometimes, messaging for the base Sometimes, messaging for the base
1006 00:42:13,364 00:42:16,568 doesn't resonate with the broader electorate. doesn't resonate with the broader electorate.
1007 00:42:17,636 00:42:20,105 Oh, okay. Oh, okay.
1008 00:42:20,138 00:42:24,643 So, to flatter them, you have to condescend to us. So, to flatter them, you have to condescend to us.
1009 00:42:25,944 00:42:28,113 I get it. I get it.
1010 00:42:28,146 00:42:30,949 Uh, no, no, that wasn't... Uh, no, no, that wasn't...
1011 00:42:30,982 00:42:33,218 that wasn't what... that wasn't what...
1012 00:42:38,123 00:42:40,125 Sorry. Sorry.
1013 00:42:41,827 00:42:43,595 How's your dad doing? How's your dad doing?
1014 00:42:43,629 00:42:45,463 Is he okay? Nervous? Is he okay? Nervous?
1015 00:42:45,496 00:42:47,565 No. (chuckles) No. (chuckles)
1016 00:42:47,599 00:42:50,268 No? Well, why would he be? He's been through a war. No? Well, why would he be? He's been through a war.
1017 00:42:50,301 00:42:51,870 He's not gonna sweat a fish fry. He's not gonna sweat a fish fry.
1018 00:42:51,903 00:42:54,139 -No, he doesn't really get nervous. -Mm-mm. -No, he doesn't really get nervous. -Mm-mm.
1019 00:42:54,172 00:42:56,074 Just quiet. Just quiet.
1020 00:42:57,108 00:42:58,910 Right. Right.
1021 00:43:03,615 00:43:05,583 Runs in the family. Runs in the family.
1022 00:43:05,617 00:43:07,018 (chuckles softly) (chuckles softly)
1023 00:43:09,420 00:43:12,991 -Maybe. -Oh. (laughing) -Maybe. -Oh. (laughing)
1024 00:43:14,025 00:43:15,593 Yes, my, uh... Yes, my, uh...
1025 00:43:15,627 00:43:19,597 my mom was really more of the talker. my mom was really more of the talker.
1026 00:43:19,631 00:43:22,267 She was... (inhales deeply) She was... (inhales deeply)
1027 00:43:23,802 00:43:26,471 You ever know anyone that just lit up a room? You ever know anyone that just lit up a room?
1028 00:43:29,140 00:43:30,575 Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
1029 00:43:30,608 00:43:32,077 Well, she was that. (laughs) Well, she was that. (laughs)
1030 00:43:32,110 00:43:33,679 Yeah. Yeah.
1031 00:43:33,712 00:43:35,446 -She sounds great. -Yeah. -She sounds great. -Yeah.
1032 00:43:37,015 00:43:39,985 So, why did your dad get involved with all this? So, why did your dad get involved with all this?
1033 00:43:40,018 00:43:42,921 I mean, why speak at that meeting? I mean, why speak at that meeting?
1034 00:43:42,954 00:43:47,292 Why run when it involves talking and people? Why run when it involves talking and people?
1035 00:43:47,325 00:43:49,094 (Diana chuckles) (Diana chuckles)
1036 00:43:49,127 00:43:52,597 I think he just loves this town. I think he just loves this town.
1037 00:43:52,630 00:43:56,501 You know, I think he'd do anything to save it. You know, I think he'd do anything to save it.
1038 00:43:56,534 00:43:58,670 What about you? What about you?
1039 00:43:58,704 00:44:01,606 (chuckles) (chuckles)
1040 00:44:01,639 00:44:04,309 Uh, I guess I would do Uh, I guess I would do
1041 00:44:04,342 00:44:07,813 just about anything to save him. just about anything to save him.
1042 00:44:09,480 00:44:11,149 (chuckles) (chuckles)
1043 00:44:12,818 00:44:15,153 -(polka music playing) -(lively chatter) -(polka music playing) -(lively chatter)
1044 00:44:16,354 00:44:19,190 (food sizzling) (food sizzling)
1045 00:44:19,224 00:44:21,159 Okay. You have a good day, now. Okay. You have a good day, now.
1046 00:44:21,192 00:44:22,894 JACK: I'll just take one. JACK: I'll just take one.
1047 00:44:25,496 00:44:27,065 Hey. How are you this evening? Hey. How are you this evening?
1048 00:44:27,098 00:44:29,634 Pamphlet? Vote for Colonel Jack. Pamphlet? Vote for Colonel Jack.
1049 00:44:29,667 00:44:31,737 Colonel Jack pamphlet. Colonel Jack pamphlet.
1050 00:44:31,770 00:44:33,471 Vote for Colonel Jack. Vote for Colonel Jack.
1051 00:44:33,504 00:44:35,540 (indistinct chatter) (indistinct chatter)
1052 00:44:35,573 00:44:37,142 How are y'all doing? How are y'all doing?
1053 00:44:37,175 00:44:38,576 ...incredible database. ...incredible database.
1054 00:44:38,609 00:44:40,311 -Yeah. -And all your information is in there. -Yeah. -And all your information is in there.
1055 00:44:40,345 00:44:42,513 (indistinct chatter continues) (indistinct chatter continues)
1056 00:44:49,587 00:44:51,689 Hey, Gary. Sorry I'm late. Hey, Gary. Sorry I'm late.
1057 00:44:51,723 00:44:53,992 I was just waiting for these to get finished. I was just waiting for these to get finished.
1058 00:44:54,025 00:44:55,727 Beer Koozies might be a little more helpful Beer Koozies might be a little more helpful
1059 00:44:55,761 00:44:57,095 than just the pamphlets. than just the pamphlets.
1060 00:44:58,563 00:45:00,866 FAITH: And this is actually very simple. FAITH: And this is actually very simple.
1061 00:45:00,899 00:45:03,201 You just type in your family's name... You just type in your family's name...
1062 00:45:03,234 00:45:05,403 DIANA: How big is that booth? DIANA: How big is that booth?
1063 00:45:08,373 00:45:09,741 -Faith. -Gary. -Faith. -Gary.
1064 00:45:09,775 00:45:12,377 You seem to be doing a brisk business. You seem to be doing a brisk business.
1065 00:45:12,410 00:45:14,045 "Deerlaken: always." "Deerlaken: always."
1066 00:45:14,079 00:45:16,047 So, apparently, So, apparently,
1067 00:45:16,081 00:45:18,216 "Deerlaken about everything" that is copyrighted? "Deerlaken about everything" that is copyrighted?
1068 00:45:18,249 00:45:20,085 Well, we were gonna go with "I'm with him" Well, we were gonna go with "I'm with him"
1069 00:45:20,118 00:45:21,787 until we remembered how fucking stupid it sounded. until we remembered how fucking stupid it sounded.
1070 00:45:21,820 00:45:23,388 No, no, no, no. I love it. No, no, no, no. I love it.
1071 00:45:23,421 00:45:25,623 I love the whole town genealogy angle. I love the whole town genealogy angle.
1072 00:45:25,656 00:45:27,458 It's got a real bold It's got a real bold
1073 00:45:27,492 00:45:29,460 "you ain't from around here" flavor. "you ain't from around here" flavor.
1074 00:45:29,494 00:45:31,429 -(laughs) -With subtle notes of, -(laughs) -With subtle notes of,
1075 00:45:31,462 00:45:33,198 -uh, xenophobia. -(laughs) -uh, xenophobia. -(laughs)
1076 00:45:33,231 00:45:35,133 Not to mention the cognitive dissonance Not to mention the cognitive dissonance
1077 00:45:35,166 00:45:37,602 that your booth is basically a love letter to immigration. that your booth is basically a love letter to immigration.
1078 00:45:37,635 00:45:38,870 That's a great observation. That's a great observation.
1079 00:45:38,904 00:45:40,605 So all these people are hypocrites? So all these people are hypocrites?
1080 00:45:40,638 00:45:42,440 -I'd run with that. -All you have is fear. -I'd run with that. -All you have is fear.
1081 00:45:42,473 00:45:43,775 -Now we're getting somewhere. -(giggles) -Now we're getting somewhere. -(giggles)
1082 00:45:43,809 00:45:45,543 20 bucks says I do better with fear 20 bucks says I do better with fear
1083 00:45:45,576 00:45:46,778 than you do with shame. than you do with shame.
1084 00:45:46,812 00:45:47,879 -Oh. -MICHAEL: Okay. -Oh. -MICHAEL: Okay.
1085 00:45:47,913 00:45:49,280 It's all set, Miss Brewster. It's all set, Miss Brewster.
1086 00:45:49,314 00:45:51,216 (gasps) Thank you, sweetie. (gasps) Thank you, sweetie.
1087 00:45:51,249 00:45:53,551 GARY: Well, well, well. GARY: Well, well, well.
1088 00:45:53,584 00:45:55,453 I'm really sorry, Mr. Z. I'm really sorry, Mr. Z.
1089 00:45:55,486 00:45:57,555 I like working with you guys, but... I like working with you guys, but...
1090 00:45:57,588 00:45:59,724 I'm saving up for a car, and she's paying us. I'm saving up for a car, and she's paying us.
1091 00:45:59,757 00:46:01,426 (mocking): "Eh, she's paying us." (mocking): "Eh, she's paying us."
1092 00:46:01,459 00:46:05,763 Wow, way to stand up for what you believe in there... Wow, way to stand up for what you believe in there...
1093 00:46:05,797 00:46:08,233 -M... Michael. -It's Michael. -M... Michael. -It's Michael.
1094 00:46:08,266 00:46:10,101 -Michael. I know his name is Michael. -His name is Michael. -Michael. I know his name is Michael. -His name is Michael.
1095 00:46:10,135 00:46:11,469 -No, you don't. -I know it. -No, you don't. -I know it.
1096 00:46:11,502 00:46:13,504 -I was pausing for effect, Michael. -It's okay, Michael. -I was pausing for effect, Michael. -It's okay, Michael.
1097 00:46:13,538 00:46:16,307 -Character is destiny, Michael. -Oh, don't listen to him. -Character is destiny, Michael. -Oh, don't listen to him.
1098 00:46:16,341 00:46:18,276 -Character is destiny. -He's a jerk. Oof. -Character is destiny. -He's a jerk. Oof.
1099 00:46:18,309 00:46:19,744 Good burn. Good burn.
1100 00:46:19,777 00:46:21,612 Jack has lived here for 30 years. Jack has lived here for 30 years.
1101 00:46:21,646 00:46:23,414 You really think you can run a campaign You really think you can run a campaign
1102 00:46:23,448 00:46:25,416 that paints him as a carpetbagger? that paints him as a carpetbagger?
1103 00:46:25,450 00:46:27,953 Probably not, but I think I can run one that says you are. Probably not, but I think I can run one that says you are.
1104 00:46:27,986 00:46:29,554 -MAN: Beer Koozie? -Oh, my God. -MAN: Beer Koozie? -Oh, my God.
1105 00:46:30,989 00:46:33,358 Oh. Hastings Koozie? Oh. Hastings Koozie?
1106 00:46:33,391 00:46:35,460 -Yeah. -Touch. -Yeah. -Touch.
1107 00:46:35,493 00:46:36,794 That's right. That's in our booth. That's right. That's in our booth.
1108 00:46:36,828 00:46:38,763 -What do you think of that? -MAN: Yeah, I'll take one. -What do you think of that? -MAN: Yeah, I'll take one.
1109 00:46:38,796 00:46:40,966 What do you think of that right there? What do you think of that right there?
1110 00:46:40,999 00:46:43,334 -Boom, boom. What do you think of that? -(gasps) -Boom, boom. What do you think of that? -(gasps)
1111 00:46:43,368 00:46:45,170 -I don't... -DOT: Oh. -I don't... -DOT: Oh.
1112 00:46:45,203 00:46:47,238 Sorry. Not you, Dot. Sorry. Not you, Dot.
1113 00:46:48,673 00:46:50,641 -DIANA: Hi. -(sighing): Oh, Dot. -DIANA: Hi. -(sighing): Oh, Dot.
1114 00:46:50,675 00:46:53,044 -(polka music continues) -(lively chatter) -(polka music continues) -(lively chatter)
1115 00:46:55,346 00:46:56,982 (laughing softly) (laughing softly)
1116 00:46:57,015 00:46:58,816 Oh. (chuckles) Oh. (chuckles)
1117 00:47:08,393 00:47:10,495 DIANA: Oh. (chuckles) DIANA: Oh. (chuckles)
1118 00:47:10,528 00:47:12,397 (sighs, chuckles) (sighs, chuckles)
1119 00:47:19,037 00:47:20,771 (chuckling) (chuckling)
1120 00:47:22,540 00:47:24,075 Whoa. Whoa.
1121 00:47:25,610 00:47:27,612 (Diana laughing) (Diana laughing)
1122 00:47:40,625 00:47:42,393 GARY: We're not doing this. GARY: We're not doing this.
1123 00:47:42,427 00:47:43,728 What? What?
1124 00:47:43,761 00:47:45,530 GARY: Ugh. GARY: Ugh.
1125 00:47:45,563 00:47:48,533 -You go through my stuff? -(papers rustling) -You go through my stuff? -(papers rustling)
1126 00:47:50,035 00:47:51,937 Why here? You have your own room. Why here? You have your own room.
1127 00:47:51,970 00:47:53,738 I don't want to smoke alone. I don't want to smoke alone.
1128 00:47:53,771 00:47:55,106 Oh, come on. Are... Oh, come on. Are...
1129 00:47:55,140 00:47:56,607 Really? Really?
1130 00:47:56,641 00:47:58,243 (Faith laughs) (Faith laughs)
1131 00:47:58,276 00:48:01,412 Gary, I'm bored. Gary, I'm bored.
1132 00:48:01,446 00:48:03,514 Please, can we just forget it? Please, can we just forget it?
1133 00:48:03,548 00:48:04,715 You've made your point. You've made your point.
1134 00:48:04,749 00:48:06,284 There's Democrats with calloused hands. There's Democrats with calloused hands.
1135 00:48:06,317 00:48:09,054 Gonna bode very well for the midterms, I promise. Gonna bode very well for the midterms, I promise.
1136 00:48:09,087 00:48:10,755 Now, can we just all go back to Washington Now, can we just all go back to Washington
1137 00:48:10,788 00:48:12,958 and forget that we ever made camp in a place and forget that we ever made camp in a place
1138 00:48:12,991 00:48:15,726 where the shit you skim off milk is considered a food? where the shit you skim off milk is considered a food?
1139 00:48:15,760 00:48:18,196 They are called cheese curds, and they are delicious. They are called cheese curds, and they are delicious.
1140 00:48:18,229 00:48:19,230 They're disgusting. They're disgusting.
1141 00:48:19,264 00:48:21,199 And you can't make poutine without them. And you can't make poutine without them.
1142 00:48:21,232 00:48:22,900 -Come on. Please. -Go. -Come on. Please. -Go.
1143 00:48:22,934 00:48:24,802 You can go. You don't have to be here. You can go. You don't have to be here.
1144 00:48:24,835 00:48:26,437 I made these people a promise. I made these people a promise.
1145 00:48:26,471 00:48:27,872 I'm a good person. I'm a good person.
1146 00:48:27,905 00:48:29,207 It's your last chance, Zim. It's your last chance, Zim.
1147 00:48:29,240 00:48:30,908 I'm gonna make a big deal of this. I'm gonna make a big deal of this.
1148 00:48:30,942 00:48:33,444 Tons of press, lots of money. You're gonna lose, Tons of press, lots of money. You're gonna lose,
1149 00:48:33,478 00:48:35,413 and then you're gonna look like a giant asshole. and then you're gonna look like a giant asshole.
1150 00:48:35,446 00:48:36,982 Good. That's what I want. Good. That's what I want.
1151 00:48:37,015 00:48:40,718 Not the asshole but for you to make a big deal of this. Not the asshole but for you to make a big deal of this.
1152 00:48:40,751 00:48:43,121 I want it to be a big deal. It is a big deal. I want it to be a big deal. It is a big deal.
1153 00:48:43,154 00:48:44,889 Well, let's make it interesting. Well, let's make it interesting.
1154 00:48:44,922 00:48:46,291 Okay, why don't we? Okay, why don't we?
1155 00:48:46,324 00:48:49,494 The loser has to eat the winner's pussy out for an hour. The loser has to eat the winner's pussy out for an hour.
1156 00:48:49,527 00:48:53,164 You better grab a big old bib, 'cause it's chow time. You better grab a big old bib, 'cause it's chow time.
1157 00:48:53,198 00:48:54,599 (snickers) (snickers)
1158 00:48:54,632 00:48:56,101 Dick chow time. Dick chow time.
1159 00:48:56,134 00:48:57,969 'Cause I'm gonna win, 'Cause I'm gonna win,
1160 00:48:58,003 00:49:00,771 -and you're gonna have to eat my dick for an hour. -Wha... -and you're gonna have to eat my dick for an hour. -Wha...
1161 00:49:00,805 00:49:02,340 GARY (in distance): And you know something? GARY (in distance): And you know something?
1162 00:49:02,373 00:49:04,442 That's a long time, dick-eating-wise. That's a long time, dick-eating-wise.
1163 00:49:04,475 00:49:05,676 (door closes) (door closes)
1164 00:49:06,711 00:49:08,946 A long time! A long time!
1165 00:49:08,980 00:49:11,016 To eat my dick. To eat my dick.
1166 00:49:12,350 00:49:15,120 (intense music playing) (intense music playing)
1167 00:49:15,153 00:49:16,954 NARRATOR: In a dangerous world NARRATOR: In a dangerous world
1168 00:49:16,988 00:49:18,623 -gone mad... -(roaring) -gone mad... -(roaring)
1169 00:49:18,656 00:49:20,992 we need emotionally stable leadership. we need emotionally stable leadership.
1170 00:49:21,026 00:49:23,161 (distorted, maniacal laughing) (distorted, maniacal laughing)
1171 00:49:23,194 00:49:25,630 Only Mayor Braun is stable enough Only Mayor Braun is stable enough
1172 00:49:25,663 00:49:27,999 to keep Deerlaken safe, to keep Deerlaken safe,
1173 00:49:28,033 00:49:30,435 to keep Deerlaken Deerlaken. to keep Deerlaken Deerlaken.
1174 00:49:30,468 00:49:32,037 (laughing) (laughing)
1175 00:49:32,070 00:49:33,838 I got you. I got you.
1176 00:49:33,871 00:49:36,841 I'm Mayor Braun, and I approve this message. I'm Mayor Braun, and I approve this message.
1177 00:49:36,874 00:49:38,209 Here. Here.
1178 00:49:38,243 00:49:40,378 ANNOUNCER: Paid for by Traditional Wisconsin Families ANNOUNCER: Paid for by Traditional Wisconsin Families
1179 00:49:40,411 00:49:41,946 for Faith and Freedom. for Faith and Freedom.
1180 00:49:41,979 00:49:44,682 -(phones ringing) -(indistinct chatter) -(phones ringing) -(indistinct chatter)
1181 00:49:44,715 00:49:46,817 FAITH: They've taken the office just across from mine. FAITH: They've taken the office just across from mine.
1182 00:49:46,851 00:49:48,053 They're definitely ramping up, They're definitely ramping up,
1183 00:49:48,086 00:49:50,221 so I'm gonna need the full crew. so I'm gonna need the full crew.
1184 00:49:50,255 00:49:53,224 If Zimmer wants to take a stand in Turdsville, USA, If Zimmer wants to take a stand in Turdsville, USA,
1185 00:49:53,258 00:49:55,026 I say we bury him here. I say we bury him here.
1186 00:49:55,060 00:49:56,461 Sorry. Sorry.
1187 00:49:56,494 00:49:57,862 Not a turd. Not a turd.
1188 00:49:57,895 00:49:59,630 Heart and soul of America. Heart and soul of America.
1189 00:49:59,664 00:50:01,566 Get me the nerdy guy from analytics. Get me the nerdy guy from analytics.
1190 00:50:01,599 00:50:04,169 -MAN (on phone): Who's that? -I don't know his name. -MAN (on phone): Who's that? -I don't know his name.
1191 00:50:04,202 00:50:06,037 He wears glasses and plaid. He wears glasses and plaid.
1192 00:50:06,071 00:50:08,173 -Has a very complicated beard. -Which one? -Has a very complicated beard. -Which one?
1193 00:50:08,206 00:50:11,309 FAITH: How the fuck does that not narrow it down? I... FAITH: How the fuck does that not narrow it down? I...
1194 00:50:11,342 00:50:13,678 -God fucking damn it. -What? -God fucking damn it. -What?
1195 00:50:13,711 00:50:16,214 And send me everyone by yesterday. And send me everyone by yesterday.
1196 00:50:16,247 00:50:17,882 (over phone): I'll get on it. (over phone): I'll get on it.
1197 00:50:17,915 00:50:19,350 -(slams phone on table) -(exhales) -(slams phone on table) -(exhales)
1198 00:50:30,261 00:50:31,962 GARY: Sor... Hey, Dot. GARY: Sor... Hey, Dot.
1199 00:50:34,732 00:50:36,167 -ANN: Gary. -KURT: Hey, big guy? -ANN: Gary. -KURT: Hey, big guy?
1200 00:50:36,201 00:50:38,203 -Yes. -We got a problem. -Yes. -We got a problem.
1201 00:50:39,604 00:50:41,005 What's up? What's up?
1202 00:50:41,038 00:50:43,174 Having trouble rounding up focus groups? Having trouble rounding up focus groups?
1203 00:50:43,208 00:50:44,409 No. No.
1204 00:50:44,442 00:50:45,910 -(dial-up modem droning, beeping) -Shh. -(dial-up modem droning, beeping) -Shh.
1205 00:50:49,147 00:50:51,282 KURT (scoffs): I don't even know what to say. KURT (scoffs): I don't even know what to say.
1206 00:50:51,316 00:50:53,718 Hey, hey, everybody. Hey, hey, everybody.
1207 00:50:53,751 00:50:56,421 Do we know why we have dial-up in this space? Do we know why we have dial-up in this space?
1208 00:50:56,454 00:50:57,755 MAN: Duffy had it upgraded MAN: Duffy had it upgraded
1209 00:50:57,788 00:50:59,524 right before he closed the shop. right before he closed the shop.
1210 00:50:59,557 00:51:00,558 Upgraded from what? Upgraded from what?
1211 00:51:01,892 00:51:03,894 -Nothing. -Well, is there any way -Nothing. -Well, is there any way
1212 00:51:03,928 00:51:06,097 we can piggyback Wi-Fi from someplace? we can piggyback Wi-Fi from someplace?
1213 00:51:06,131 00:51:08,599 Uh, there's a place where the kids go and they do homework Uh, there's a place where the kids go and they do homework
1214 00:51:08,633 00:51:09,900 and they play games and whatnot. and they play games and whatnot.
1215 00:51:09,934 00:51:12,403 -I know the password. -GARY: Okay. -I know the password. -GARY: Okay.
1216 00:51:12,437 00:51:14,539 -Solving problems. -ANN: Nice! -Solving problems. -ANN: Nice!
1217 00:51:14,572 00:51:16,574 (typing) (typing)
1218 00:51:20,445 00:51:21,812 (knocking on window) (knocking on window)
1219 00:51:21,846 00:51:23,848 (Gary sighs) (Gary sighs)
1220 00:51:25,816 00:51:29,754 Listen, I... I don't think you're allowed to be here Listen, I... I don't think you're allowed to be here
1221 00:51:29,787 00:51:32,890 unless you're on official school business, so... unless you're on official school business, so...
1222 00:51:32,923 00:51:35,393 Okay, look, uh, Officer... Okay, look, uh, Officer...
1223 00:51:35,426 00:51:37,262 -Tommy. -Officer Tommy. -Tommy. -Officer Tommy.
1224 00:51:37,295 00:51:40,064 Um, we are with the Hastings campaign, Um, we are with the Hastings campaign,
1225 00:51:40,097 00:51:42,433 and we're trying to get some work done here. and we're trying to get some work done here.
1226 00:51:42,467 00:51:44,068 It's sort of time-sensitive. It's sort of time-sensitive.
1227 00:51:44,101 00:51:47,104 So... um, okay, here we go. So... um, okay, here we go.
1228 00:51:47,138 00:51:49,073 Here is a pen. Here is a pen.
1229 00:51:49,106 00:51:51,176 -Okay. -And... -Okay. -And...
1230 00:51:51,209 00:51:53,511 -one of these beer thingies. -KURT: Koozie. -one of these beer thingies. -KURT: Koozie.
1231 00:51:53,544 00:51:56,314 Koozie, and, uh... Koozie, and, uh...
1232 00:51:56,347 00:51:58,616 thank you for your service. thank you for your service.
1233 00:52:04,121 00:52:06,123 (typing continues) (typing continues)
1234 00:52:11,829 00:52:14,399 -(knocking on window) -Oh, for God sakes. -(knocking on window) -Oh, for God sakes.
1235 00:52:15,866 00:52:19,003 Hello, boys. Hello, boys.
1236 00:52:19,036 00:52:20,805 (muffled): Gentlemen, these are children! (muffled): Gentlemen, these are children!
1237 00:52:20,838 00:52:22,440 -DIANA: Hey. -Hi. -Children! -DIANA: Hey. -Hi. -Children!
1238 00:52:22,473 00:52:25,042 -Great job, guys. -And do you know what that looked like? -Great job, guys. -And do you know what that looked like?
1239 00:52:25,075 00:52:26,777 Sitting in your car? Sitting in your car?
1240 00:52:26,811 00:52:28,879 A bunch of boys on the computer? A bunch of boys on the computer?
1241 00:52:30,147 00:52:32,750 (clapping) (clapping)
1242 00:52:35,186 00:52:37,355 No, no, no. Thank you. No, no, no. Thank you.
1243 00:52:37,388 00:52:40,458 So, I see they sprung you from detention, huh? So, I see they sprung you from detention, huh?
1244 00:52:40,491 00:52:42,126 Yeah, apparently, small-town hospitality Yeah, apparently, small-town hospitality
1245 00:52:42,159 00:52:44,195 doesn't apply to Wi-Fi. doesn't apply to Wi-Fi.
1246 00:52:44,229 00:52:45,896 They're not too keen on strangers staking out They're not too keen on strangers staking out
1247 00:52:45,930 00:52:47,965 a school parking lot-- you know, kids and all. a school parking lot-- you know, kids and all.
1248 00:52:47,998 00:52:49,667 Yeah, in hindsight, that makes complete sense. Yeah, in hindsight, that makes complete sense.
1249 00:52:49,700 00:52:51,001 JACK: Mm-hmm. JACK: Mm-hmm.
1250 00:52:51,035 00:52:53,003 Guys, could I talk to you for a sec? Guys, could I talk to you for a sec?
1251 00:52:53,037 00:52:54,171 -Yeah. -My office. -Yeah. -My office.
1252 00:52:54,205 00:52:56,173 Come on in. Have a seat. Come on in. Have a seat.
1253 00:52:56,207 00:52:57,975 You can leave the door open. You can leave the door open.
1254 00:52:58,008 00:52:59,710 -Here's the deal. -(claps) -Here's the deal. -(claps)
1255 00:52:59,744 00:53:02,179 Our opponents are pumping way more into this Our opponents are pumping way more into this
1256 00:53:02,213 00:53:04,081 than I ever expected them to. than I ever expected them to.
1257 00:53:04,114 00:53:07,151 -DIANA: Huh. -This rinky-dink stuff is not gonna fly. -DIANA: Huh. -This rinky-dink stuff is not gonna fly.
1258 00:53:07,184 00:53:09,186 We need to up our fundraising game. We need to up our fundraising game.
1259 00:53:09,220 00:53:11,155 Okay. That's... Okay. That's...
1260 00:53:11,188 00:53:13,924 Sure. Do you want to do, uh, like, a street fair or...? Sure. Do you want to do, uh, like, a street fair or...?
1261 00:53:13,958 00:53:15,926 -That's a good idea. -(Gary chuckles) -That's a good idea. -(Gary chuckles)
1262 00:53:15,960 00:53:17,428 No, it's not a good idea. No, it's not a good idea.
1263 00:53:17,462 00:53:19,564 Don't... No, we're not gonna do that. Don't... No, we're not gonna do that.
1264 00:53:19,597 00:53:21,666 Have you ever been to New York? Have you ever been to New York?
1265 00:53:21,699 00:53:23,568 (dial-up modem droning) (dial-up modem droning)
1266 00:53:25,236 00:53:27,372 Oh, my God, please unplug it. Oh, my God, please unplug it.
1267 00:53:27,405 00:53:29,006 Please unplug it. Please unplug it.
1268 00:53:29,039 00:53:30,375 (droning continues) (droning continues)
1269 00:53:30,408 00:53:32,410 Unplug it! Unplug it!
1270 00:53:32,443 00:53:34,178 (food crunching) (food crunching)
1271 00:53:34,211 00:53:36,581 GARY: I'm just looking at the guest list here. GARY: I'm just looking at the guest list here.
1272 00:53:36,614 00:53:38,949 Great. Great turnout. Great. Great turnout.
1273 00:53:38,983 00:53:41,619 Especially considering the short notice. Especially considering the short notice.
1274 00:53:41,652 00:53:43,187 Really good. Really good.
1275 00:53:43,220 00:53:44,589 (exhales slowly) (exhales slowly)
1276 00:53:44,622 00:53:47,392 Mmm. You ever have one of those? Mmm. You ever have one of those?
1277 00:53:49,594 00:53:51,562 Yeah, green beans. Yeah, green beans.
1278 00:53:51,596 00:53:53,063 Green bean. Green bean.
1279 00:53:53,097 00:53:54,399 (green bean crunching) (green bean crunching)
1280 00:53:54,432 00:53:57,468 Isn't that French for "green beans"? Isn't that French for "green beans"?
1281 00:53:57,502 00:54:00,104 These are more delicate. These are more delicate.
1282 00:54:00,137 00:54:01,772 Thinner, more flavorful. Thinner, more flavorful.
1283 00:54:04,842 00:54:07,512 -I didn't know you spoke French. -Mm. -I didn't know you spoke French. -Mm.
1284 00:54:10,315 00:54:11,916 Would you like something? Would you like something?
1285 00:54:11,949 00:54:14,084 Nerd. Nerd.
1286 00:54:15,453 00:54:17,254 (crunching) (crunching)
1287 00:54:17,288 00:54:19,290 This too loud? This too loud?
1288 00:54:23,260 00:54:24,995 (clears throat quietly) (clears throat quietly)
1289 00:54:26,331 00:54:28,533 (grunting softly) (grunting softly)
1290 00:54:32,303 00:54:33,971 (swallows) (swallows)
1291 00:54:34,004 00:54:36,040 (grunting) (grunting)
1292 00:54:42,847 00:54:44,349 (coughs quietly) (coughs quietly)
1293 00:54:49,987 00:54:51,422 -(elevator bell dings) -Richard and Ginnie Peeler -(elevator bell dings) -Richard and Ginnie Peeler
1294 00:54:51,456 00:54:52,423 are hosting. are hosting.
1295 00:54:52,457 00:54:53,991 He's a hedge fund swell. He's a hedge fund swell.
1296 00:54:54,024 00:54:56,193 She's been saving the Hudson for about 25 years. She's been saving the Hudson for about 25 years.
1297 00:54:56,226 00:54:58,028 Richard Peeler. Yeah? Richard Peeler. Yeah?
1298 00:54:58,062 00:54:59,697 Got it. Got it.
1299 00:55:01,799 00:55:03,801 Are you, like, 12? Are you, like, 12?
1300 00:55:05,503 00:55:07,171 -(both chuckle) -(elevator bell dings) -(both chuckle) -(elevator bell dings)
1301 00:55:07,204 00:55:09,273 RICHARD: It's not only that the sand traps are deeper, RICHARD: It's not only that the sand traps are deeper,
1302 00:55:09,306 00:55:11,376 but the quality of the sand at... but the quality of the sand at...
1303 00:55:11,409 00:55:13,043 Excuse me. Gary! Hey. Excuse me. Gary! Hey.
1304 00:55:13,077 00:55:15,179 Dick Peeler. Dick Peeler.
1305 00:55:15,212 00:55:17,682 RICHARD: Gary, thank you for coming. RICHARD: Gary, thank you for coming.
1306 00:55:17,715 00:55:19,784 GARY: Oh, my pleasure. Thanks for having us. GARY: Oh, my pleasure. Thanks for having us.
1307 00:55:19,817 00:55:21,285 RICHARD: Well, we're really, really excited. RICHARD: Well, we're really, really excited.
1308 00:55:21,318 00:55:23,454 GARY: We're excited. Jack! Jack! GARY: We're excited. Jack! Jack!
1309 00:55:23,488 00:55:25,055 I'd like you to meet Richard Peeler. I'd like you to meet Richard Peeler.
1310 00:55:25,089 00:55:26,290 -What an honor. -Colonel Jack Hastings. -What an honor. -Colonel Jack Hastings.
1311 00:55:26,323 00:55:27,992 -Oh. -Very nice to meet you. -Oh. -Very nice to meet you.
1312 00:55:28,025 00:55:29,960 -Thank you for... having us. -Oh, it's really an honor. -Thank you for... having us. -Oh, it's really an honor.
1313 00:55:29,994 00:55:32,029 -And, uh... -Yeah. -And, uh... -Yeah.
1314 00:55:32,062 00:55:34,665 No, it's, uh, you know, the authentic thing here. No, it's, uh, you know, the authentic thing here.
1315 00:55:34,699 00:55:36,300 I see that. It's amazing. I see that. It's amazing.
1316 00:55:36,333 00:55:38,068 Uh, can I get you something to drink? Uh, can I get you something to drink?
1317 00:55:38,102 00:55:39,637 Sure. What would you like? Sure. What would you like?
1318 00:55:39,670 00:55:42,807 Uh, I'd like a little, uh, tea. Uh, I'd like a little, uh, tea.
1319 00:55:42,840 00:55:44,742 Chamomile if you have it. Chamomile if you have it.
1320 00:55:44,775 00:55:46,210 (laughs) All right. (laughs) All right.
1321 00:55:46,243 00:55:47,578 That's fine. You want a Scotch. That's fine. You want a Scotch.
1322 00:55:47,612 00:55:48,946 -Yes, please. -Yes, I know that. -Yes, please. -Yes, I know that.
1323 00:55:51,882 00:55:54,952 (indistinct conversations) (indistinct conversations)
1324 00:55:56,721 00:55:58,489 MAN: He's a criminal. MAN: He's a criminal.
1325 00:55:58,523 00:55:59,857 Oh, thank you. Oh, thank you.
1326 00:55:59,890 00:56:01,191 He's a criminal. He's a criminal.
1327 00:56:01,225 00:56:02,660 Trust me, I've done deals with him. Trust me, I've done deals with him.
1328 00:56:02,693 00:56:04,361 WOMAN: Our democracy is falling apart. WOMAN: Our democracy is falling apart.
1329 00:56:04,395 00:56:05,596 We're gonna lose it. We're gonna lose it.
1330 00:56:05,630 00:56:07,331 Tom Friedman had a great line. Tom Friedman had a great line.
1331 00:56:07,364 00:56:09,500 MAN: I like to say he's the Bitcoin of presidents. MAN: I like to say he's the Bitcoin of presidents.
1332 00:56:09,534 00:56:11,402 WOMAN: Her whole dress line was made in China. WOMAN: Her whole dress line was made in China.
1333 00:56:11,436 00:56:13,337 WOMAN: The man is mentally ill. WOMAN: The man is mentally ill.
1334 00:56:13,370 00:56:14,739 MAN: Clownstick's fuckface. MAN: Clownstick's fuckface.
1335 00:56:14,772 00:56:16,507 MAN: I'm mad? We should all be mad. MAN: I'm mad? We should all be mad.
1336 00:56:16,541 00:56:19,043 MAN: I mean, what kind of person hunts elephants? MAN: I mean, what kind of person hunts elephants?
1337 00:56:19,076 00:56:21,378 And there's not a whole lot of the, um... And there's not a whole lot of the, um...
1338 00:56:21,412 00:56:22,780 What did you call that? What did you call that?
1339 00:56:22,813 00:56:24,749 -Uh, farm-to-table. -The farm-to-table. -Uh, farm-to-table. -The farm-to-table.
1340 00:56:24,782 00:56:29,186 I mean, I guess it all kind of, uh... I mean, I guess it all kind of, uh...
1341 00:56:29,219 00:56:33,791 all goes from farms to tables of some kind. all goes from farms to tables of some kind.
1342 00:56:37,261 00:56:39,764 RICHARD: We're so excited that you're all here. RICHARD: We're so excited that you're all here.
1343 00:56:39,797 00:56:42,099 And we are so thankful And we are so thankful
1344 00:56:42,132 00:56:44,234 to our old friend for presenting us to our old friend for presenting us
1345 00:56:44,268 00:56:47,738 with another informative and, uh, just stimulating evening. with another informative and, uh, just stimulating evening.
1346 00:56:47,772 00:56:49,940 -Oh. -(laughter) -Oh. -(laughter)
1347 00:56:49,974 00:56:51,876 RICHARD: You know him. You love him. RICHARD: You know him. You love him.
1348 00:56:51,909 00:56:53,544 -And sometimes hate. -(laughter) -And sometimes hate. -(laughter)
1349 00:56:53,578 00:56:56,614 -Hate writing the checks, but, uh, you know. -Yeah. -Hate writing the checks, but, uh, you know. -Yeah.
1350 00:56:58,015 00:57:00,250 -Gary. -Thank you. Thanks so much. -Gary. -Thank you. Thanks so much.
1351 00:57:00,284 00:57:01,719 Thanks for coming. Thanks for coming.
1352 00:57:01,752 00:57:02,987 And thank you... And thank you...
1353 00:57:03,020 00:57:05,289 Keep that going for the Peelers, please. Keep that going for the Peelers, please.
1354 00:57:05,322 00:57:07,892 Their tremendous hospitality. Their tremendous hospitality.
1355 00:57:07,925 00:57:10,260 Listen, I'm not gonna take up too much of your time Listen, I'm not gonna take up too much of your time
1356 00:57:10,294 00:57:12,997 other than to say thank you all for being here. other than to say thank you all for being here.
1357 00:57:13,030 00:57:16,066 One thing I do want to say, though, is that One thing I do want to say, though, is that
1358 00:57:16,100 00:57:19,904 Colonel Jack Hastings is the embodiment Colonel Jack Hastings is the embodiment
1359 00:57:19,937 00:57:22,172 of America's real greatness. of America's real greatness.
1360 00:57:22,206 00:57:26,176 Service to nation, hard work, faith. Service to nation, hard work, faith.
1361 00:57:26,210 00:57:29,346 Republicans don't own those values, do they? Republicans don't own those values, do they?
1362 00:57:29,379 00:57:30,948 -(crowd murmuring) -They don't own 'em. -(crowd murmuring) -They don't own 'em.
1363 00:57:30,981 00:57:32,917 They can't. They can't.
1364 00:57:32,950 00:57:34,351 Inclusion. Inclusion.
1365 00:57:34,384 00:57:35,920 That's the most important of all. That's the most important of all.
1366 00:57:35,953 00:57:37,855 But sometimes, we get comfortable But sometimes, we get comfortable
1367 00:57:37,888 00:57:39,657 in our own little ideological bubbles. in our own little ideological bubbles.
1368 00:57:39,690 00:57:41,258 I see them. I see them.
1369 00:57:41,291 00:57:43,127 You can't see them, necessarily, but I see 'em. You can't see them, necessarily, but I see 'em.
1370 00:57:43,160 00:57:44,529 There's a little bubble there. There's a little bubble there.
1371 00:57:44,562 00:57:46,497 -(laughter) -There's a little bubble there. -(laughter) -There's a little bubble there.
1372 00:57:46,531 00:57:48,699 And we forget to reach out. And we forget to reach out.
1373 00:57:48,733 00:57:51,368 To find empathy and understanding To find empathy and understanding
1374 00:57:51,401 00:57:55,105 across religious or racial across religious or racial
1375 00:57:55,139 00:57:57,875 or just plain geographical boundaries. or just plain geographical boundaries.
1376 00:57:57,908 00:58:00,811 And I hope tonight changes that, even just a little bit. And I hope tonight changes that, even just a little bit.
1377 00:58:01,846 00:58:04,181 So, without further ado, So, without further ado,
1378 00:58:04,214 00:58:06,651 I would like you to join me in welcoming I would like you to join me in welcoming
1379 00:58:06,684 00:58:10,454 the next mayor of Deerlaken, Wisconsin, the next mayor of Deerlaken, Wisconsin,
1380 00:58:10,487 00:58:12,790 Colonel Jack Hastings. Colonel Jack Hastings.
1381 00:58:12,823 00:58:14,825 -(applause, whooping) -MAN: Hear, hear. -(applause, whooping) -MAN: Hear, hear.
1382 00:58:19,496 00:58:22,466 Uh, uh... thanks, folks. Uh, uh... thanks, folks.
1383 00:58:22,499 00:58:25,536 And thanks to Gary And thanks to Gary
1384 00:58:25,570 00:58:28,539 -and to the Peelers. -RICHARD: Thank you. -and to the Peelers. -RICHARD: Thank you.
1385 00:58:28,573 00:58:31,175 Wow, this is a great house. Wow, this is a great house.
1386 00:58:31,208 00:58:33,077 It's a great house. It's a great house.
1387 00:58:33,110 00:58:35,312 A... A...
1388 00:58:35,345 00:58:37,047 (chuckles quietly) (chuckles quietly)
1389 00:58:37,081 00:58:39,650 I see some of you are... I see some of you are...
1390 00:58:39,684 00:58:42,352 wondering what I'm doing here. wondering what I'm doing here.
1391 00:58:43,387 00:58:44,622 And... And...
1392 00:58:45,923 00:58:48,525 I think I'm wondering the same. I think I'm wondering the same.
1393 00:58:49,860 00:58:51,495 Uh... Uh...
1394 00:58:51,528 00:58:53,530 I guess that's the point. I guess that's the point.
1395 00:58:55,199 00:58:58,669 Without all this, you might never have met me. Without all this, you might never have met me.
1396 00:58:58,703 00:59:02,139 And I certainly wouldn't have met you. And I certainly wouldn't have met you.
1397 00:59:03,540 00:59:04,942 But... But...
1398 00:59:06,577 00:59:08,579 ...uh, now we have. ...uh, now we have.
1399 00:59:10,047 00:59:11,582 (sighs) (sighs)
1400 00:59:11,616 00:59:14,118 So, uh... So, uh...
1401 00:59:16,887 00:59:18,188 A... A...
1402 00:59:18,222 00:59:19,924 Colonel, Colonel. Colonel, Colonel.
1403 00:59:19,957 00:59:22,526 -Yeah. -Gary Zimmer from "The D.C. Bugle." -Yeah. -Gary Zimmer from "The D.C. Bugle."
1404 00:59:22,559 00:59:24,862 -(laughter) -Um, why... -(laughter) -Um, why...
1405 00:59:24,895 00:59:28,933 why should a bunch of uptight Upper West Siders care about why should a bunch of uptight Upper West Siders care about
1406 00:59:28,966 00:59:30,635 a little town in Wisconsin? a little town in Wisconsin?
1407 00:59:30,668 00:59:32,637 (quiet murmuring) (quiet murmuring)
1408 00:59:32,670 00:59:35,105 Uh, it's hard to say. Uh, it's hard to say.
1409 00:59:36,240 00:59:38,408 I guess we're hurting, I guess we're hurting,
1410 00:59:38,442 00:59:41,445 looking for help from you. looking for help from you.
1411 00:59:43,648 00:59:45,415 What can we do to help? What can we do to help?
1412 00:59:45,449 00:59:47,584 I'll take that. Money. I'll take that. Money.
1413 00:59:47,618 00:59:49,553 -(laughter) -Money. -(laughter) -Money.
1414 00:59:49,586 00:59:52,456 It's a serious question, actually. It's a serious question, actually.
1415 00:59:52,489 00:59:55,259 You know, our politics seem broken. You know, our politics seem broken.
1416 00:59:55,292 00:59:59,596 Colonel, what do you see is the system's greatest weakness? Colonel, what do you see is the system's greatest weakness?
1417 01:00:02,767 01:00:06,570 Hmm, well, I guess, for one thing, Hmm, well, I guess, for one thing,
1418 01:00:06,603 01:00:08,973 this. this.
1419 01:00:09,006 01:00:10,641 Here, tonight. Here, tonight.
1420 01:00:12,376 01:00:15,379 And I mean no disrespect. And I mean no disrespect.
1421 01:00:16,647 01:00:19,917 I just think this seems a bit crazy. I just think this seems a bit crazy.
1422 01:00:19,950 01:00:22,086 I want to help my town. I want to help my town.
1423 01:00:22,119 01:00:24,021 I want to be mayor, I want to be mayor,
1424 01:00:24,054 01:00:27,257 some town in the middle of Wisconsin. some town in the middle of Wisconsin.
1425 01:00:27,291 01:00:29,159 So, instead of being home So, instead of being home
1426 01:00:29,193 01:00:32,196 working on some smart things to help my town, working on some smart things to help my town,
1427 01:00:32,229 01:00:35,099 I have to fly here to your town I have to fly here to your town
1428 01:00:35,132 01:00:38,035 and convince you that my town's worth saving. and convince you that my town's worth saving.
1429 01:00:38,068 01:00:40,838 And that I'm worth it. And that I'm worth it.
1430 01:00:40,871 01:00:44,608 And that saving it is worth it to you. And that saving it is worth it to you.
1431 01:00:44,641 01:00:46,777 All so you can give me some money. All so you can give me some money.
1432 01:00:46,811 01:00:49,814 Not for my town, but for me. Not for my town, but for me.
1433 01:00:49,847 01:00:54,418 To help convince my town that I'm worth it. To help convince my town that I'm worth it.
1434 01:00:56,253 01:00:59,623 I mean... I mean...
1435 01:00:59,656 01:01:03,994 I don't know, it just sounds so stupid. I don't know, it just sounds so stupid.
1436 01:01:05,662 01:01:06,831 (sighs) (sighs)
1437 01:01:08,432 01:01:09,867 (Jack grunts softly) (Jack grunts softly)
1438 01:01:19,109 01:01:20,745 Still crying? Still crying?
1439 01:01:22,412 01:01:24,715 GARY: A little bit. GARY: A little bit.
1440 01:01:24,749 01:01:26,183 JACK: Mm. JACK: Mm.
1441 01:01:27,785 01:01:32,489 You gonna do that all the way home? You gonna do that all the way home?
1442 01:01:32,522 01:01:34,224 Yes. Yes.
1443 01:01:37,261 01:01:39,263 Why? Why?
1444 01:01:40,530 01:01:42,566 Because the seat belt sign is on Because the seat belt sign is on
1445 01:01:42,599 01:01:45,435 and I can't get up to hug you. and I can't get up to hug you.
1446 01:01:45,469 01:01:48,372 Damn, Jack. Damn, Jack.
1447 01:01:48,405 01:01:50,908 (sighs) You walked in there, (sighs) You walked in there,
1448 01:01:50,941 01:01:54,011 into the lion's den like that... into the lion's den like that...
1449 01:01:54,044 01:01:55,079 Daniel. Daniel.
1450 01:01:55,112 01:01:56,914 Yeah, and just... Yeah, and just...
1451 01:01:56,947 01:02:00,184 you told 'em, straight up, this isn't right. you told 'em, straight up, this isn't right.
1452 01:02:00,217 01:02:02,352 This is wrong. The system is corrupt. This is wrong. The system is corrupt.
1453 01:02:02,386 01:02:04,621 (imitating Al Pacino): I'm out of order? You're out of order. (imitating Al Pacino): I'm out of order? You're out of order.
1454 01:02:04,654 01:02:06,190 The whole damn system's out of order! The whole damn system's out of order!
1455 01:02:06,223 01:02:08,725 Attica! To... Attica! To...
1456 01:02:08,759 01:02:10,060 (grunts intensely) (grunts intensely)
1457 01:02:10,094 01:02:12,129 (gasps) Money. (gasps) Money.
1458 01:02:12,162 01:02:16,600 Oh, God, their money is the problem? Oh, God, their money is the problem?
1459 01:02:16,633 01:02:19,069 (chuckling): Oh! (chuckling): Oh!
1460 01:02:19,103 01:02:20,771 You should've seen their faces. You should've seen their faces.
1461 01:02:20,805 01:02:22,406 I saw. I saw.
1462 01:02:22,439 01:02:26,076 They ate it up. They ate it up.
1463 01:02:26,110 01:02:28,612 We could've named our price. We could've named our price.
1464 01:02:28,645 01:02:31,115 (grunts, laughs) (grunts, laughs)
1465 01:02:31,148 01:02:32,883 Oh, no way Faith matches. Oh, no way Faith matches.
1466 01:02:32,917 01:02:35,252 -And why is that, now? -Oh. -And why is that, now? -Oh.
1467 01:02:35,285 01:02:38,388 Because they're spending to stop something, Because they're spending to stop something,
1468 01:02:38,422 01:02:40,457 and we're spending to start something. and we're spending to start something.
1469 01:02:41,658 01:02:43,493 -(Gary sighs) -Hmm. -(Gary sighs) -Hmm.
1470 01:02:43,527 01:02:45,429 (imitating Peter Finch): I'm mad as hell, (imitating Peter Finch): I'm mad as hell,
1471 01:02:45,462 01:02:47,832 and I can't take it anymore! and I can't take it anymore!
1472 01:02:47,865 01:02:50,167 -(Jack chuckles) -(gasps) Oh! -(Jack chuckles) -(gasps) Oh!
1473 01:02:50,200 01:02:52,502 Gary, you... green bean? Gary, you... green bean?
1474 01:02:52,536 01:02:54,004 No. (laughs) No. (laughs)
1475 01:02:54,038 01:02:55,940 Okay. No, thank you. Okay. No, thank you.
1476 01:02:58,042 01:03:00,110 (sighs): Wow. (sighs): Wow.
1477 01:03:00,144 01:03:02,813 I'm telling you, he is the real deal. I'm telling you, he is the real deal.
1478 01:03:02,847 01:03:05,649 It is like a Bill Clinton with impulse control. It is like a Bill Clinton with impulse control.
1479 01:03:05,682 01:03:07,651 Like a churchgoing Bernie Sanders Like a churchgoing Bernie Sanders
1480 01:03:07,684 01:03:09,353 with better bone density. with better bone density.
1481 01:03:09,386 01:03:10,988 -He... Oh, here they are. -JACK: Hello. Good morning. -He... Oh, here they are. -JACK: Hello. Good morning.
1482 01:03:11,021 01:03:12,622 Here they are. Here they are.
1483 01:03:12,656 01:03:14,624 Ladies and gentlemen, the next mayor of Deerlaken Ladies and gentlemen, the next mayor of Deerlaken
1484 01:03:14,658 01:03:15,960 and his talented first daughter. and his talented first daughter.
1485 01:03:15,993 01:03:18,095 -Please join me. -You are fired up, huh? -Please join me. -You are fired up, huh?
1486 01:03:18,128 01:03:20,330 I am fired... Why wouldn't I be fired up? I am fired... Why wouldn't I be fired up?
1487 01:03:20,364 01:03:24,634 I am working with the future of the Democratic Party here. I am working with the future of the Democratic Party here.
1488 01:03:24,668 01:03:27,771 Oh, your dad the other night was transcendent. Oh, your dad the other night was transcendent.
1489 01:03:27,804 01:03:29,506 He crushed it. He crushed it.
1490 01:03:29,539 01:03:31,775 And because of that, I'd like to show you And because of that, I'd like to show you
1491 01:03:31,808 01:03:34,111 the fruits of your labor. the fruits of your labor.
1492 01:03:34,144 01:03:37,982 Because he was so good, I was able to hire... Because he was so good, I was able to hire...
1493 01:03:38,015 01:03:39,783 the "A" team. the "A" team.
1494 01:03:39,816 01:03:41,651 -Mm-hmm. -GARY: I'm just kidding. -Mm-hmm. -GARY: I'm just kidding.
1495 01:03:41,685 01:03:43,153 They're not the "A" team. They're not the "A" team.
1496 01:03:43,187 01:03:44,721 Not that you aren't great. Not that you aren't great.
1497 01:03:44,754 01:03:47,391 -But this... -(keypad beeping) -But this... -(keypad beeping)
1498 01:03:47,424 01:03:48,792 is the real "A" team. is the real "A" team.
1499 01:03:48,825 01:03:50,660 TINA: I get it, but what are the numbers? TINA: I get it, but what are the numbers?
1500 01:03:50,694 01:03:52,462 (Diana gasps) (Diana gasps)
1501 01:03:52,496 01:03:54,264 (quiet, indistinct chatter) (quiet, indistinct chatter)
1502 01:03:56,066 01:03:57,501 -You know Kurt Lehman, polling and modeling. -Oh, my God. -You know Kurt Lehman, polling and modeling. -Oh, my God.
1503 01:03:57,534 01:03:58,802 -Yes. Hi. -KURT: Hi. -Yes. Hi. -KURT: Hi.
1504 01:03:58,835 01:04:00,704 -He gives us a window into the electorate. -Hi. -Hey. -He gives us a window into the electorate. -Hi. -Hey.
1505 01:04:00,737 01:04:02,372 -How are you? -GARY: Best in the business. -How are you? -GARY: Best in the business.
1506 01:04:02,406 01:04:04,008 When everyone was predicting Hillary When everyone was predicting Hillary
1507 01:04:04,041 01:04:06,911 in a landslide over Trump, Kurt was the one guy in a landslide over Trump, Kurt was the one guy
1508 01:04:06,944 01:04:09,813 who had her just barely beating him. who had her just barely beating him.
1509 01:04:09,846 01:04:13,050 My models just picked up the trend lines, so... (chuckles) My models just picked up the trend lines, so... (chuckles)
1510 01:04:13,083 01:04:15,052 If the election had taken place a month or two later... If the election had taken place a month or two later...
1511 01:04:15,085 01:04:17,922 My numbers would've been 100% on the money. My numbers would've been 100% on the money.
1512 01:04:17,955 01:04:19,723 -Mm-hmm. -DIANA: Wow. -Mm-hmm. -DIANA: Wow.
1513 01:04:19,756 01:04:21,225 Impressive. Impressive.
1514 01:04:21,258 01:04:22,526 Well... Well...
1515 01:04:22,559 01:04:24,161 Well, he was the least wrong. Well, he was the least wrong.
1516 01:04:24,194 01:04:25,930 Tina Kuryev, analytics. Tina Kuryev, analytics.
1517 01:04:25,963 01:04:27,597 She gives us a window into the voters. She gives us a window into the voters.
1518 01:04:27,631 01:04:29,033 Good to meet you, sir. Good to meet you, sir.
1519 01:04:29,066 01:04:31,768 Oh. I thought, uh, polling did that. Oh. I thought, uh, polling did that.
1520 01:04:31,801 01:04:34,371 -It does. -Well, he tells you how he thinks they feel. -It does. -Well, he tells you how he thinks they feel.
1521 01:04:34,404 01:04:36,240 I tell you how they really feel. I tell you how they really feel.
1522 01:04:38,242 01:04:41,078 -People are liars. -Here we go. -People are liars. -Here we go.
1523 01:04:41,111 01:04:44,248 He can tell you how often people say they go to church. He can tell you how often people say they go to church.
1524 01:04:44,281 01:04:45,882 She can tell you if they actually go. She can tell you if they actually go.
1525 01:04:45,916 01:04:47,918 I can tell you if God is in their hearts. I can tell you if God is in their hearts.
1526 01:04:47,952 01:04:49,419 -Oh, my God. -Tina's in online analytics. -Oh, my God. -Tina's in online analytics.
1527 01:04:49,453 01:04:50,921 KURT: Hey, can I just say-- KURT: Hey, can I just say--
1528 01:04:50,955 01:04:53,390 we take deception into account, too, okay? (chuckles) we take deception into account, too, okay? (chuckles)
1529 01:04:53,423 01:04:55,525 Yeah, polling is an art form, but, Yeah, polling is an art form, but,
1530 01:04:55,559 01:04:57,928 you know, there's plenty of science to back it up. you know, there's plenty of science to back it up.
1531 01:04:57,962 01:05:00,197 Says the guy still calling landlines. Says the guy still calling landlines.
1532 01:05:00,230 01:05:02,699 People tell computers the truth, right? People tell computers the truth, right?
1533 01:05:02,732 01:05:04,868 Their desires, their prejudices. Their desires, their prejudices.
1534 01:05:04,901 01:05:06,736 Every search, every transaction-- Every search, every transaction--
1535 01:05:06,770 01:05:08,738 it's an unguarded private moment. it's an unguarded private moment.
1536 01:05:08,772 01:05:11,976 So there's no, uh, margin of error, you know? So there's no, uh, margin of error, you know?
1537 01:05:12,009 01:05:14,878 The digital footprint is your true self. The digital footprint is your true self.
1538 01:05:14,911 01:05:16,947 But, surely, people are more complicated But, surely, people are more complicated
1539 01:05:16,981 01:05:19,083 than their online transactions. than their online transactions.
1540 01:05:19,116 01:05:21,151 Well, says the woman with three cats Well, says the woman with three cats
1541 01:05:21,185 01:05:23,753 and an intense search history of the herpes virus. and an intense search history of the herpes virus.
1542 01:05:29,960 01:05:31,895 One of the cats... One of the cats...
1543 01:05:31,928 01:05:33,763 Is this legal? Is this legal?
1544 01:05:33,797 01:05:36,433 Law enforcement or in the eyes of God? Law enforcement or in the eyes of God?
1545 01:05:39,269 01:05:41,938 NEWSWOMAN: With two weeks to go until election day, NEWSWOMAN: With two weeks to go until election day,
1546 01:05:41,972 01:05:44,141 we have an update on the Deerlaken mayoral race. we have an update on the Deerlaken mayoral race.
1547 01:05:44,174 01:05:46,143 The race between Colonel Jack Hastings The race between Colonel Jack Hastings
1548 01:05:46,176 01:05:49,579 and incumbent Mayor Billy Braun is tightening. and incumbent Mayor Billy Braun is tightening.
1549 01:05:49,613 01:05:51,481 Who here has been chosen as 527s? Who here has been chosen as 527s?
1550 01:05:51,515 01:05:52,616 -Raise your hands, please. -(murmuring) -Raise your hands, please. -(murmuring)
1551 01:05:52,649 01:05:55,519 One, two, three, four. Good. One, two, three, four. Good.
1552 01:05:55,552 01:05:57,621 You all run super PACs now. You all run super PACs now.
1553 01:05:57,654 01:06:01,825 You are no longer associated with this campaign. You are no longer associated with this campaign.
1554 01:06:01,858 01:06:06,630 And as such, it is time to move to your super PAC location, And as such, it is time to move to your super PAC location,
1555 01:06:06,663 01:06:09,866 which is all the way at the back of the room, which is all the way at the back of the room,
1556 01:06:09,899 01:06:13,870 far, far away from the activity of the campaign. far, far away from the activity of the campaign.
1557 01:06:14,971 01:06:16,506 Right now? Right now?
1558 01:06:16,540 01:06:19,176 I am not at liberty to say. I am not at liberty to say.
1559 01:06:19,209 01:06:22,712 The campaign cannot coordinate with the super PAC. The campaign cannot coordinate with the super PAC.
1560 01:06:22,746 01:06:24,148 So... So...
1561 01:06:24,181 01:06:26,383 (whispers): After the meeting. (whispers): After the meeting.
1562 01:06:26,416 01:06:28,452 * You always won * You always won
1563 01:06:28,485 01:06:30,887 * Every time you placed a bet... * * Every time you placed a bet... *
1564 01:06:34,091 01:06:35,859 Get me that fucking sat truck! Get me that fucking sat truck!
1565 01:06:35,892 01:06:38,562 Get it now! They're gonna out-communicate us! Get it now! They're gonna out-communicate us!
1566 01:06:38,595 01:06:41,198 Here, we have an unusual cluster of single women. Here, we have an unusual cluster of single women.
1567 01:06:41,231 01:06:42,499 They're all gonna get pamphlets They're all gonna get pamphlets
1568 01:06:42,532 01:06:44,134 saying that the mayor is gonna repeal saying that the mayor is gonna repeal
1569 01:06:44,168 01:06:45,969 the health care payment for birth control. the health care payment for birth control.
1570 01:06:46,002 01:06:47,071 JACK: What's this? JACK: What's this?
1571 01:06:47,104 01:06:49,639 It's eight SMAWs. It's eight SMAWs.
1572 01:06:49,673 01:06:51,841 Stay-at-home middle-aged women. Stay-at-home middle-aged women.
1573 01:06:51,875 01:06:54,144 -29 to 54. -DIANA: 29? -29 to 54. -DIANA: 29?
1574 01:06:54,178 01:06:56,046 That's middle-aged? That's middle-aged?
1575 01:06:56,080 01:06:58,082 Yes. Yes, it is. Yes. Yes, it is.
1576 01:06:58,115 01:06:59,883 KURT: You got to do it on the adjective. KURT: You got to do it on the adjective.
1577 01:06:59,916 01:07:01,518 Safe streets. It's not safe streets. Safe streets. It's not safe streets.
1578 01:07:01,551 01:07:03,520 -Everybody wants safe streets! -Safe... No, no, no. -Everybody wants safe streets! -Safe... No, no, no.
1579 01:07:03,553 01:07:04,988 Okay, that's coming off a little angry. Okay, that's coming off a little angry.
1580 01:07:05,021 01:07:07,257 GARY: Did you finish those donor calls? GARY: Did you finish those donor calls?
1581 01:07:07,291 01:07:08,858 JACK: Yeah, just about. JACK: Yeah, just about.
1582 01:07:08,892 01:07:10,894 I just always had a notion that farmers had a... I just always had a notion that farmers had a...
1583 01:07:10,927 01:07:12,562 I'm sorry, are... are you clicking your heels? I'm sorry, are... are you clicking your heels?
1584 01:07:12,596 01:07:13,997 Are you Dorothy? Are you Dorothy?
1585 01:07:14,030 01:07:15,665 Is there no place like home? Is there no place like home?
1586 01:07:15,699 01:07:18,034 * Turning on the charm * Turning on the charm
1587 01:07:18,068 01:07:21,004 -* Long enough to get you by -* Still the same... -* Long enough to get you by -* Still the same...
1588 01:07:21,037 01:07:24,274 JACK: America's greatness and God's grace... JACK: America's greatness and God's grace...
1589 01:07:24,308 01:07:27,844 I'd go to battle for those two any day. I'd go to battle for those two any day.
1590 01:07:27,877 01:07:29,379 ANNOUNCER: Paid for by Wisconsinites ANNOUNCER: Paid for by Wisconsinites
1591 01:07:29,413 01:07:30,880 for Religiously Based Compassionate Empathy. for Religiously Based Compassionate Empathy.
1592 01:07:35,719 01:07:36,920 -(Jack sighs) -Did you just sigh? -(Jack sighs) -Did you just sigh?
1593 01:07:36,953 01:07:38,355 -Did he just sigh? -Oh, I can't... -Did he just sigh? -Oh, I can't...
1594 01:07:38,388 01:07:39,756 Don't even get me started with sighing. Don't even get me started with sighing.
1595 01:07:39,789 01:07:41,891 TINA: Now, here, this cluster in blue TINA: Now, here, this cluster in blue
1596 01:07:41,925 01:07:43,693 have children, so they're gonna get have children, so they're gonna get
1597 01:07:43,727 01:07:46,062 pamphlets saying "save our schools" pamphlets saying "save our schools"
1598 01:07:46,096 01:07:49,366 because it's 1950 and everybody loves pamphlets. because it's 1950 and everybody loves pamphlets.
1599 01:07:49,399 01:07:50,967 "Hi. My name is Jack. I'm exasperated." "Hi. My name is Jack. I'm exasperated."
1600 01:07:51,000 01:07:52,269 (takes exaggerated deep breath) (takes exaggerated deep breath)
1601 01:07:52,302 01:07:54,471 Why don't we move on to the WoMAMs? Why don't we move on to the WoMAMs?
1602 01:07:54,504 01:07:56,206 White middle-aged men. White middle-aged men.
1603 01:07:56,240 01:07:57,607 (laughter) (laughter)
1604 01:07:59,576 01:08:03,947 * I had nothing left to say * I had nothing left to say
1605 01:08:03,980 01:08:05,949 * 'Cause you're still the same * * 'Cause you're still the same *
1606 01:08:05,982 01:08:07,551 * Still the same * Still the same
1607 01:08:07,584 01:08:09,886 * Baby, baby, still the same * Baby, baby, still the same
1608 01:08:09,919 01:08:11,255 GARY: What's this? GARY: What's this?
1609 01:08:11,288 01:08:12,656 KURT: Walt. KURT: Walt.
1610 01:08:12,689 01:08:14,057 * You're still the same... * You're still the same...
1611 01:08:14,090 01:08:15,725 Is that an acronym? Is that an acronym?
1612 01:08:15,759 01:08:18,128 No, it is not. No, it is not.
1613 01:08:19,996 01:08:24,368 Can I still bring baked goods to the super PAC location? Can I still bring baked goods to the super PAC location?
1614 01:08:25,602 01:08:27,604 (indistinct whispering) (indistinct whispering)
1615 01:08:31,841 01:08:33,109 No. No.
1616 01:08:34,344 01:08:36,613 (dramatic, cinematic music playing) (dramatic, cinematic music playing)
1617 01:08:50,527 01:08:54,431 I'm Colonel Jack Hastings, and I approve this message. I'm Colonel Jack Hastings, and I approve this message.
1618 01:08:54,464 01:08:56,099 ANNOUNCER: You want to come to Deerlaken, ANNOUNCER: You want to come to Deerlaken,
1619 01:08:56,132 01:08:57,867 you'll have to go through him. you'll have to go through him.
1620 01:08:57,901 01:09:00,470 (echoing boom) (echoing boom)
1621 01:09:00,504 01:09:02,839 Paid for by Powerful Progressives for Strength. Paid for by Powerful Progressives for Strength.
1622 01:09:02,872 01:09:04,874 (mouthing) (mouthing)
1623 01:09:06,476 01:09:08,044 -Thank you so much, sir. -You're welcome. -Thank you so much, sir. -You're welcome.
1624 01:09:08,077 01:09:09,479 Thank you so much for your support. Thank you so much for your support.
1625 01:09:09,513 01:09:11,248 -Thank you. -Thank you. -Thank you. -Thank you.
1626 01:09:13,683 01:09:16,720 How the hell did she get the bayou billionaires involved? How the hell did she get the bayou billionaires involved?
1627 01:09:16,753 01:09:18,188 You okay? Do you need some help? You okay? Do you need some help?
1628 01:09:18,222 01:09:20,023 -Just fine. -You're good? Okay, thank you. -Just fine. -You're good? Okay, thank you.
1629 01:09:20,056 01:09:21,691 She must have promised that they could have She must have promised that they could have
1630 01:09:21,725 01:09:23,427 the town smelted after the election. the town smelted after the election.
1631 01:09:28,498 01:09:30,334 I'm just very impressed with all this. I'm just very impressed with all this.
1632 01:09:30,367 01:09:32,836 -You... you do the polling. -KURT: Uh-huh. In fact... -You... you do the polling. -KURT: Uh-huh. In fact...
1633 01:09:32,869 01:09:33,837 (heavy, metallic thumping) (heavy, metallic thumping)
1634 01:09:33,870 01:09:35,472 GARY: There it is. GARY: There it is.
1635 01:09:35,505 01:09:36,640 What is that? What is that?
1636 01:09:36,673 01:09:38,408 No, who is that? Elton Chambers. No, who is that? Elton Chambers.
1637 01:09:38,442 01:09:40,544 The Rocket Man? The Rocket Man?
1638 01:09:40,577 01:09:42,412 The billionaire Rocket Man, yes. The billionaire Rocket Man, yes.
1639 01:09:42,446 01:09:44,548 Jesus Chr... I thought he was dead. Jesus Chr... I thought he was dead.
1640 01:09:44,581 01:09:46,516 -Well, he is dead. -GARY: No, no, no. -Well, he is dead. -GARY: No, no, no.
1641 01:09:46,550 01:09:48,585 A series of micro-strokes. It's all good. A series of micro-strokes. It's all good.
1642 01:09:48,618 01:09:50,754 (slow, heavy thumping) (slow, heavy thumping)
1643 01:09:53,957 01:09:55,859 (door creaks open) (door creaks open)
1644 01:09:55,892 01:09:58,762 -(mechanical whirring) -(heavy, metallic footsteps) -(mechanical whirring) -(heavy, metallic footsteps)
1645 01:10:06,970 01:10:10,707 Sir Elton, thank you so, so much for coming. Sir Elton, thank you so, so much for coming.
1646 01:10:10,740 01:10:13,743 Everyone, this is the great Sir Elton. Everyone, this is the great Sir Elton.
1647 01:10:15,312 01:10:17,547 Let's get through the pleasantries. Let's get through the pleasantries.
1648 01:10:17,581 01:10:20,350 This is Jack Hastings and his daughter Diana. This is Jack Hastings and his daughter Diana.
1649 01:10:20,384 01:10:24,288 ELTON (robotic, melodic voice): Hello to you. ELTON (robotic, melodic voice): Hello to you.
1650 01:10:24,321 01:10:26,856 GARY: All right, well, let's get right to it, then. GARY: All right, well, let's get right to it, then.
1651 01:10:26,890 01:10:32,095 ELTON (tune of "Hava Nagila"): Tell me, what is your position ELTON (tune of "Hava Nagila"): Tell me, what is your position
1652 01:10:32,128 01:10:35,532 concerning the settlement concerning the settlement
1653 01:10:35,565 01:10:40,637 of Kevyat Sharim? of Kevyat Sharim?
1654 01:10:42,171 01:10:44,240 Uh... Uh...
1655 01:10:44,274 01:10:45,775 I'm not sure I... I'm not sure I...
1656 01:10:45,809 01:10:46,976 Israel. Israel.
1657 01:10:47,010 01:10:50,046 Jack believes that sovereign nations Jack believes that sovereign nations
1658 01:10:50,079 01:10:51,615 are entitled to self-defense. are entitled to self-defense.
1659 01:10:51,648 01:10:52,882 ELTON: Strongly? ELTON: Strongly?
1660 01:10:52,916 01:10:54,183 Strongly believes, yes. Strongly believes, yes.
1661 01:10:55,184 01:10:57,321 (mechanical whirring) (mechanical whirring)
1662 01:10:57,354 01:10:59,689 (Elton gasps, stammers) (Elton gasps, stammers)
1663 01:11:01,257 01:11:02,992 (normal voice): An election is a moral horror, (normal voice): An election is a moral horror,
1664 01:11:03,026 01:11:05,462 as bad as a battle but without the blood. as bad as a battle but without the blood.
1665 01:11:05,495 01:11:07,797 That's George Bernard Shaw. That's George Bernard Shaw.
1666 01:11:09,333 01:11:10,767 (robotic, melodic voice): Get the car. (robotic, melodic voice): Get the car.
1667 01:11:10,800 01:11:12,168 (whispers): I think that went well. (whispers): I think that went well.
1668 01:11:12,201 01:11:13,803 KURT: Seemed like a really nice guy. KURT: Seemed like a really nice guy.
1669 01:11:13,837 01:11:15,439 Actually looked pretty good, right? Actually looked pretty good, right?
1670 01:11:15,472 01:11:16,806 -Yeah. -Surprisingly robust. -Yeah. -Surprisingly robust.
1671 01:11:16,840 01:11:18,842 Elton Chambers is in. Elton Chambers is in.
1672 01:11:18,875 01:11:21,010 -Oh. -TINA: Ah. All right. -Oh. -TINA: Ah. All right.
1673 01:11:21,044 01:11:22,579 Making it rain. Making it rain.
1674 01:11:22,612 01:11:25,315 He actually has a machine that makes it rain. He actually has a machine that makes it rain.
1675 01:11:35,359 01:11:38,428 GARY: This margin of error is really shrinking. GARY: This margin of error is really shrinking.
1676 01:11:38,462 01:11:39,596 Excuse me. Gary... Excuse me. Gary...
1677 01:11:39,629 01:11:40,830 -Mr. Zimmer. -Mm-mm. -Mr. Zimmer. -Mm-mm.
1678 01:11:40,864 01:11:43,299 -Becca, super PAC. -Uh... -Becca, super PAC. -Uh...
1679 01:11:43,333 01:11:45,502 Okay. Okay.
1680 01:11:45,535 01:11:47,437 -Uh, big guy? -GARY: Hmm? -Uh, big guy? -GARY: Hmm?
1681 01:11:47,471 01:11:49,473 We got a problem. We got a problem.
1682 01:11:58,482 01:12:00,016 (keypad beeps) (keypad beeps)
1683 01:12:00,049 01:12:02,018 Hey, everybody. Hey, everybody.
1684 01:12:02,051 01:12:03,987 Hard at work, I see. That's good. Hard at work, I see. That's good.
1685 01:12:04,020 01:12:06,222 That's good. I had a couple of questions. That's good. I had a couple of questions.
1686 01:12:06,255 01:12:07,957 The first is: What the fuck?! The first is: What the fuck?!
1687 01:12:07,991 01:12:10,159 What tactical genius in here What tactical genius in here
1688 01:12:10,193 01:12:12,396 thought it might be a good idea to carpet-bomb thought it might be a good idea to carpet-bomb
1689 01:12:12,429 01:12:15,231 a particular neighborhood in this town a particular neighborhood in this town
1690 01:12:15,264 01:12:18,968 with flyers suggesting that Colonel Jack Hastings with flyers suggesting that Colonel Jack Hastings
1691 01:12:19,002 01:12:20,637 -would make sure... -(sighs): Fuck. -would make sure... -(sighs): Fuck.
1692 01:12:20,670 01:12:24,173 -...that contraception is paid for by the government? -...that contraception is paid for by the government?
1693 01:12:27,877 01:12:29,513 Uh, I did. Uh, I did.
1694 01:12:29,546 01:12:31,848 -KURT (shuddering): Oh. -TINA: The data showed an -KURT (shuddering): Oh. -TINA: The data showed an
1695 01:12:31,881 01:12:33,917 unusually concentrated grouping of single women in the area unusually concentrated grouping of single women in the area
1696 01:12:33,950 01:12:36,085 who are deeply interested in reproductive rights. who are deeply interested in reproductive rights.
1697 01:12:36,119 01:12:37,353 And you know why that is? And you know why that is?
1698 01:12:37,387 01:12:38,822 (chuckling): Well, "why" is not really... (chuckling): Well, "why" is not really...
1699 01:12:38,855 01:12:40,657 Because this "concentrated grouping of single women," Because this "concentrated grouping of single women,"
1700 01:12:40,690 01:12:42,692 as you put it, is a convent. as you put it, is a convent.
1701 01:12:43,793 01:12:45,595 They are nuns. They are nuns.
1702 01:12:45,629 01:12:48,665 Which is how many of them are going to end up voting for us. Which is how many of them are going to end up voting for us.
1703 01:12:48,698 01:12:51,100 "Nuns" of them. Zero. "Nuns" of them. Zero.
1704 01:12:51,134 01:12:53,336 -(laughs) -It's not funny. -(laughs) -It's not funny.
1705 01:12:53,369 01:12:55,371 I'm not laughing. I'm not laughing.
1706 01:12:57,707 01:12:59,943 (sighs) Fuck. (sighs) Fuck.
1707 01:12:59,976 01:13:02,712 Well, I think we can appreciate the humor Well, I think we can appreciate the humor
1708 01:13:02,746 01:13:05,114 in this very honest mistake. in this very honest mistake.
1709 01:13:05,148 01:13:06,950 And the fact that the nuns And the fact that the nuns
1710 01:13:06,983 01:13:08,452 are generously turning the other cheek are generously turning the other cheek
1711 01:13:08,485 01:13:09,853 makes it a nonstory, but... makes it a nonstory, but...
1712 01:13:09,886 01:13:11,254 FAITH: Brooke, Brooke, if I may. FAITH: Brooke, Brooke, if I may.
1713 01:13:11,287 01:13:13,389 Uh, this is really just another perfect example Uh, this is really just another perfect example
1714 01:13:13,423 01:13:16,526 of the D.C. elite coming into a place they don't understand of the D.C. elite coming into a place they don't understand
1715 01:13:16,560 01:13:18,261 and trying to dictate how we should live. and trying to dictate how we should live.
1716 01:13:18,294 01:13:20,597 The Democrat Party can't win. They're getting desperate. The Democrat Party can't win. They're getting desperate.
1717 01:13:20,630 01:13:22,699 They don't know us, they don't want to know us, They don't know us, they don't want to know us,
1718 01:13:22,732 01:13:24,734 -and they look down on our values. -GARY: No, no. -and they look down on our values. -GARY: No, no.
1719 01:13:24,768 01:13:26,636 That's "we." You're D.C. elite. That's "we." You're D.C. elite.
1720 01:13:26,670 01:13:28,271 Oh, no, actually, I'm from here. Oh, no, actually, I'm from here.
1721 01:13:28,304 01:13:29,739 BROOKE: Faith, I didn't know that. BROOKE: Faith, I didn't know that.
1722 01:13:29,773 01:13:31,808 -You're from Wisconsin? -Mm-hmm. Yeah. -You're from Wisconsin? -Mm-hmm. Yeah.
1723 01:13:31,841 01:13:33,610 Well, no, "Deer-lake-en." I'm from "Deer-lake-en." Well, no, "Deer-lake-en." I'm from "Deer-lake-en."
1724 01:13:33,643 01:13:35,411 -What? Whoa. -BROOKE: Oh. Wow. -What? Whoa. -BROOKE: Oh. Wow.
1725 01:13:35,445 01:13:37,547 So this campaign has been a bit of a homecoming. So this campaign has been a bit of a homecoming.
1726 01:13:37,581 01:13:39,248 -It really is, Brooke. Thank you. -No, no. -It really is, Brooke. Thank you. -No, no.
1727 01:13:39,282 01:13:41,150 No, no, that's a lie. That's a lie. No, no, that's a lie. That's a lie.
1728 01:13:41,184 01:13:42,652 -No, it's... -You're lying. -No, it's... -You're lying.
1729 01:13:42,686 01:13:43,887 -It's-it's the truth. -She's ly... That's... -It's-it's the truth. -She's ly... That's...
1730 01:13:43,920 01:13:45,455 -I'm from here. -No, that... What are you even doing? -I'm from here. -No, that... What are you even doing?
1731 01:13:45,489 01:13:46,656 -(laughing): Okay. -I-I am from here. -(laughing): Okay. -I-I am from here.
1732 01:13:46,690 01:13:47,991 -You're not from here! -Well, as always, a great -You're not from here! -Well, as always, a great
1733 01:13:48,024 01:13:49,392 -and spirited discussion. -Thank you so much. -and spirited discussion. -Thank you so much.
1734 01:13:49,425 01:13:50,760 -No, hey! No, no, no, no. She's lying. -Thank you both. -No, hey! No, no, no, no. She's lying. -Thank you both.
1735 01:13:50,794 01:13:52,095 -Unfortunately, we have to leave it there. -She's a li... -Unfortunately, we have to leave it there. -She's a li...
1736 01:13:52,128 01:13:55,064 Coming up, we'll look at more of this year's hot races Coming up, we'll look at more of this year's hot races
1737 01:13:55,098 01:13:57,834 and how those will affect races four years from now. and how those will affect races four years from now.
1738 01:13:57,867 01:13:59,969 Why do you even lie about something like that? Why do you even lie about something like that?
1739 01:14:00,003 01:14:03,439 (sighs) Honestly, I, uh... I don't even know. (sighs) Honestly, I, uh... I don't even know.
1740 01:14:03,473 01:14:05,141 (mocking): "I... I don't even know." (mocking): "I... I don't even know."
1741 01:14:05,174 01:14:06,976 Wh-What do you mean, you don't know? Wh-What do you mean, you don't know?
1742 01:14:07,010 01:14:10,013 You can't just lie about something like that. You can't just lie about something like that.
1743 01:14:10,046 01:14:12,315 You just walk away? You just walk away?
1744 01:14:12,348 01:14:15,752 You just told America that you're from "Deer-lake-en"? You just told America that you're from "Deer-lake-en"?
1745 01:14:15,785 01:14:18,421 That's not even how you pronounce it! That's not even how you pronounce it!
1746 01:14:18,454 01:14:21,625 "Deer-lake-en," my ass. "Deer-lake-en," my ass.
1747 01:14:21,658 01:14:23,760 Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
1748 01:14:23,793 01:14:26,362 She's a fucking genius! She's a fucking genius!
1749 01:14:26,395 01:14:28,097 Oh! Oh!
1750 01:14:28,131 01:14:30,433 Oh, my God, I hate her so much. Oh, my God, I hate her so much.
1751 01:14:30,466 01:14:32,035 I hate her. I hate her. I hate her. I hate her.
1752 01:14:32,068 01:14:34,704 She said it, and now it's the truth. She said it, and now it's the truth.
1753 01:14:34,738 01:14:37,641 (sighing): Fuck me. (sighing): Fuck me.
1754 01:14:37,674 01:14:39,208 -(indistinct chatter) -(music playing) -(indistinct chatter) -(music playing)
1755 01:14:39,242 01:14:40,710 WAITRESS: Another round, guys? WAITRESS: Another round, guys?
1756 01:14:40,744 01:14:42,178 Okay. Okay.
1757 01:14:43,980 01:14:46,282 FAITH: Goddamn it. You're killing me. FAITH: Goddamn it. You're killing me.
1758 01:14:46,315 01:14:47,617 KURT: That's good. Yeah. KURT: That's good. Yeah.
1759 01:14:47,651 01:14:50,019 (indistinct chatter continues) (indistinct chatter continues)
1760 01:14:50,053 01:14:51,655 Come on. Let's get out of here. Come on. Let's get out of here.
1761 01:14:51,688 01:14:52,856 GARY: Hey, Mikes! GARY: Hey, Mikes!
1762 01:14:52,889 01:14:54,891 How you doing, guys? How you doing, guys?
1763 01:14:57,827 01:14:59,228 Hello, everybody. Hello, everybody.
1764 01:14:59,262 01:15:01,330 -KURT: Hey, big guy. -DIANA: Hey, Gary. Um... -KURT: Hey, big guy. -DIANA: Hey, Gary. Um...
1765 01:15:01,364 01:15:03,700 -Burger and a Bud. -Oh, thank you very much. -Burger and a Bud. -Oh, thank you very much.
1766 01:15:03,733 01:15:05,702 You know, that looks great. Uh, can I have one of those? You know, that looks great. Uh, can I have one of those?
1767 01:15:05,735 01:15:07,136 No. No.
1768 01:15:07,170 01:15:09,338 GARY: What you guys doing? Looking at some ads? GARY: What you guys doing? Looking at some ads?
1769 01:15:09,372 01:15:11,040 DIANA: Yeah, they're just taking me through it. DIANA: Yeah, they're just taking me through it.
1770 01:15:11,074 01:15:12,976 Bio. Very nice. Bio. Very nice.
1771 01:15:13,009 01:15:15,144 Education. That's important. Education. That's important.
1772 01:15:15,178 01:15:17,647 Hey, are we sure that we want to be doing this here Hey, are we sure that we want to be doing this here
1773 01:15:17,681 01:15:19,749 and not in Faith's room or the mayor's office? and not in Faith's room or the mayor's office?
1774 01:15:19,783 01:15:22,819 Because right now I'm not sure that our opposition knows Because right now I'm not sure that our opposition knows
1775 01:15:22,852 01:15:24,721 exactly what we're about to do. exactly what we're about to do.
1776 01:15:24,754 01:15:26,590 And that seems unfair. No, no, no, no, no. And that seems unfair. No, no, no, no, no.
1777 01:15:26,623 01:15:28,157 Don't put 'em away on my account. Don't put 'em away on my account.
1778 01:15:28,191 01:15:30,526 Why don't we got one of those overhead projectors Why don't we got one of those overhead projectors
1779 01:15:30,560 01:15:31,928 -that you have at a bowling alley? -Stop. -that you have at a bowling alley? -Stop.
1780 01:15:31,961 01:15:33,763 -Kurt, you don't have to leave. -So everybody here can see it. -Kurt, you don't have to leave. -So everybody here can see it.
1781 01:15:33,797 01:15:34,764 Wouldn't that be good? Wouldn't that be good?
1782 01:15:34,798 01:15:36,065 Kurt, come on. Kurt, come on.
1783 01:15:37,867 01:15:39,035 Mmm! Mmm!
1784 01:15:39,068 01:15:40,570 Why do you talk to them like that? Why do you talk to them like that?
1785 01:15:40,604 01:15:41,771 Like what? Like what?
1786 01:15:41,805 01:15:43,039 Like that. Like they're idiots. Like that. Like they're idiots.
1787 01:15:43,072 01:15:44,741 (inhales sharply) Well... (inhales sharply) Well...
1788 01:15:44,774 01:15:45,875 (chuckles) (chuckles)
1789 01:15:45,909 01:15:47,911 Listen. Listen.
1790 01:15:47,944 01:15:49,278 (sighs) (sighs)
1791 01:15:49,312 01:15:51,247 I saw some polls. I saw some polls.
1792 01:15:51,280 01:15:52,882 If we don't figure this out soon, If we don't figure this out soon,
1793 01:15:52,916 01:15:54,517 there's no way we're gonna beat her. there's no way we're gonna beat her.
1794 01:15:54,550 01:15:57,186 -Our demographics are so... -"Her"? -Our demographics are so... -"Her"?
1795 01:15:57,220 01:16:00,123 -Who? -Her. -Who? -Her.
1796 01:16:00,156 01:16:02,692 DIANA: I mean, you said, if we don't figure it out soon, DIANA: I mean, you said, if we don't figure it out soon,
1797 01:16:02,726 01:16:04,460 we're not gonna be able to beat her. we're not gonna be able to beat her.
1798 01:16:04,493 01:16:06,429 We're not gonna beat her candidate, Braun. We're not gonna beat her candidate, Braun.
1799 01:16:06,462 01:16:07,797 Major Braun. Major Braun.
1800 01:16:07,831 01:16:10,199 Mr. ... Mr. Braun. Mr. ... Mr. Braun.
1801 01:16:10,233 01:16:11,735 Herr, her. Same thing. Herr, her. Same thing.
1802 01:16:11,768 01:16:13,102 DIANA: Mm-hmm. DIANA: Mm-hmm.
1803 01:16:13,136 01:16:15,739 Look, Gary, I don't, um, really understand Look, Gary, I don't, um, really understand
1804 01:16:15,772 01:16:17,440 how you guys do things in D.C., how you guys do things in D.C.,
1805 01:16:17,473 01:16:19,108 but if you're gonna work for my father, but if you're gonna work for my father,
1806 01:16:19,142 01:16:20,610 you need to treat people with respect. you need to treat people with respect.
1807 01:16:20,644 01:16:22,378 -With. With. -What? -With. With. -What?
1808 01:16:22,411 01:16:24,147 Work with your father, not for. Work with your father, not for.
1809 01:16:24,180 01:16:26,950 You said "for." It's a semantic thing, but... You said "for." It's a semantic thing, but...
1810 01:16:26,983 01:16:29,819 it's... you know, it's an important distinction. it's... you know, it's an important distinction.
1811 01:16:33,923 01:16:36,292 Just so you know, Just so you know,
1812 01:16:36,325 01:16:38,461 they don't actually serve hamburgers and Budweiser here, they don't actually serve hamburgers and Budweiser here,
1813 01:16:38,494 01:16:40,396 'cause it's a hofbrau house, so they would serve 'cause it's a hofbrau house, so they would serve
1814 01:16:40,429 01:16:41,965 German food and German beers. German food and German beers.
1815 01:16:41,998 01:16:43,466 They've been patronizing you. They've been patronizing you.
1816 01:16:49,706 01:16:53,142 Just so you know, I don't even like hamburgers or Budweiser, Just so you know, I don't even like hamburgers or Budweiser,
1817 01:16:53,176 01:16:54,678 so I've been patronizing them... so I've been patronizing them...
1818 01:16:54,711 01:16:56,179 -the whole time. -Okay. Ah. -the whole time. -Okay. Ah.
1819 01:16:56,212 01:16:57,613 Did a little switcheroo. Did a little switcheroo.
1820 01:16:57,647 01:17:00,449 Oh, and just so you know, congratulations. Oh, and just so you know, congratulations.
1821 01:17:00,483 01:17:02,618 Our campaign made the paper. Our campaign made the paper.
1822 01:17:05,121 01:17:06,355 (sighs): Oh, God. (sighs): Oh, God.
1823 01:17:09,558 01:17:11,961 (takes deep breath) (takes deep breath)
1824 01:17:13,529 01:17:15,631 She's so pretty. She's so pretty.
1825 01:17:15,665 01:17:18,167 I bet she smells like Pop-Tarts. I bet she smells like Pop-Tarts.
1826 01:17:22,706 01:17:25,041 Is he still looking? (laughs) Is he still looking? (laughs)
1827 01:17:25,074 01:17:26,542 NEWSWOMAN: Now, Colonel Jack Hastings. NEWSWOMAN: Now, Colonel Jack Hastings.
1828 01:17:26,575 01:17:28,144 -NEWSMAN: Mm-hmm. Absolutely. -Military man. -NEWSMAN: Mm-hmm. Absolutely. -Military man.
1829 01:17:28,177 01:17:30,013 -From the heartland. -Yep. -From the heartland. -Yep.
1830 01:17:30,046 01:17:31,547 -No greater place in America. -(chuckling) -No greater place in America. -(chuckling)
1831 01:17:31,580 01:17:32,982 -No, no. -Am I right? -No, no. -Am I right?
1832 01:17:33,016 01:17:36,152 -Nope. -He is now part of the loony left. -Nope. -He is now part of the loony left.
1833 01:17:36,185 01:17:38,955 No, not just the loony left. He's not just a Democrat. No, not just the loony left. He's not just a Democrat.
1834 01:17:38,988 01:17:40,623 -No. -He has joined the... -No. -He has joined the...
1835 01:17:40,656 01:17:42,558 -Squad. -Socialism. -Mm-hmm. -Squad. -Socialism. -Mm-hmm.
1836 01:17:42,591 01:17:44,127 Socialism. Hmm. Socialism. Hmm.
1837 01:17:44,160 01:17:46,162 Do you think it hurts our military Do you think it hurts our military
1838 01:17:46,195 01:17:49,598 to have one of their own throw in with the Democrats? to have one of their own throw in with the Democrats?
1839 01:17:51,100 01:17:54,337 I know that if I had served, I know that if I had served,
1840 01:17:54,370 01:17:56,405 I wouldn't like it. I wouldn't like it.
1841 01:17:56,439 01:17:59,375 Mm. Yeah. Mm. Yeah.
1842 01:17:59,408 01:18:02,979 FAITH (from other room): Wow, that was a harsh segment. FAITH (from other room): Wow, that was a harsh segment.
1843 01:18:03,012 01:18:04,981 -Cutting but fair. -(sighs) -Cutting but fair. -(sighs)
1844 01:18:05,014 01:18:07,984 It's like I wrote it myself last night and sent it to them It's like I wrote it myself last night and sent it to them
1845 01:18:08,017 01:18:10,820 and they read it verbatim like a scene. and they read it verbatim like a scene.
1846 01:18:10,854 01:18:12,989 Go to bed. Go to bed.
1847 01:18:13,022 01:18:14,190 GARY: What is this? GARY: What is this?
1848 01:18:14,223 01:18:15,358 What am I looking at? What am I looking at?
1849 01:18:15,391 01:18:16,760 KURT: Those are the... KURT: Those are the...
1850 01:18:16,793 01:18:18,661 Why are we being outspent three-to-one? Why are we being outspent three-to-one?
1851 01:18:18,694 01:18:20,163 And how do white women not realize And how do white women not realize
1852 01:18:20,196 01:18:21,530 they're backing the wrong horse? they're backing the wrong horse?
1853 01:18:21,564 01:18:22,866 These numbers aren't solidified. These numbers aren't solidified.
1854 01:18:22,899 01:18:24,533 Yeah, well, you got to make it happen, Yeah, well, you got to make it happen,
1855 01:18:24,567 01:18:27,603 or you got to find me some more fucking Hispanics. or you got to find me some more fucking Hispanics.
1856 01:18:27,636 01:18:29,572 Where are my fucking Hispanics?! Where are my fucking Hispanics?!
1857 01:18:29,605 01:18:33,409 -I need some more fucking Hispanics, Kurt! -(snapping) -I need some more fucking Hispanics, Kurt! -(snapping)
1858 01:18:40,483 01:18:42,551 Hey, everybody. Hey, everybody.
1859 01:18:42,585 01:18:44,087 Listen. Listen.
1860 01:18:44,120 01:18:45,889 I am profoundly disappointed I am profoundly disappointed
1861 01:18:45,922 01:18:48,724 in the comments that I just made. in the comments that I just made.
1862 01:18:48,758 01:18:52,095 My words and/or actions My words and/or actions
1863 01:18:52,128 01:18:55,598 do not represent who I am as a person and... do not represent who I am as a person and...
1864 01:18:55,631 01:18:57,733 -Teachable moment. -It is a teachable moment. -Teachable moment. -It is a teachable moment.
1865 01:18:57,767 01:19:00,870 It's something I think we can all learn from. It's something I think we can all learn from.
1866 01:19:00,904 01:19:02,238 And in that way, I feel like And in that way, I feel like
1867 01:19:02,271 01:19:03,773 -I have given you a gift. -(phone ringing) -I have given you a gift. -(phone ringing)
1868 01:19:03,807 01:19:05,775 -(quietly): You have my heart. -And from this moment on, -(quietly): You have my heart. -And from this moment on,
1869 01:19:05,809 01:19:07,376 I vow to make this office I vow to make this office
1870 01:19:07,410 01:19:11,647 a color- and gender-neutral work environment. a color- and gender-neutral work environment.
1871 01:19:11,680 01:19:13,783 -(phone continues ringing) -That is my... -(phone continues ringing) -That is my...
1872 01:19:13,817 01:19:16,085 -Are you gonna get that? -(phone clicks, ringing stops) -Are you gonna get that? -(phone clicks, ringing stops)
1873 01:19:16,119 01:19:18,321 Ringing off the fucking hook. Ringing off the fucking hook.
1874 01:19:18,354 01:19:19,923 TINA (over phone): A hundred percent. TINA (over phone): A hundred percent.
1875 01:19:19,956 01:19:21,424 GARY: What do you mean, you're sure? GARY: What do you mean, you're sure?
1876 01:19:21,457 01:19:22,959 TINA: I'm sure. TINA: I'm sure.
1877 01:19:22,992 01:19:24,928 GARY: You're sure, or you're just pretty sure? GARY: You're sure, or you're just pretty sure?
1878 01:19:24,961 01:19:26,595 -TINA: 100% sure. -GARY: Okay. -TINA: 100% sure. -GARY: Okay.
1879 01:19:26,629 01:19:29,933 Okay, Tina. Better not be another nun situation. Okay, Tina. Better not be another nun situation.
1880 01:19:29,966 01:19:31,667 TINA: It's not. TINA: It's not.
1881 01:19:31,700 01:19:33,469 GARY: Hey. Is your dad here? GARY: Hey. Is your dad here?
1882 01:19:33,502 01:19:35,071 Yeah. Dad! Yeah. Dad!
1883 01:19:35,104 01:19:37,540 -JACK: Yeah? -Come on in, Colonel. -JACK: Yeah? -Come on in, Colonel.
1884 01:19:41,110 01:19:44,447 So, um, we can't win. So, um, we can't win.
1885 01:19:47,016 01:19:51,454 The people in this town are pretty set in their ways. The people in this town are pretty set in their ways.
1886 01:19:51,487 01:19:53,156 And we lost the eight nuns. And we lost the eight nuns.
1887 01:19:53,189 01:19:54,457 That wasn't good. That wasn't good.
1888 01:19:54,490 01:19:57,560 So, we can't win. So, we can't win.
1889 01:19:59,128 01:20:03,166 Uh... y-you know, we appreciate all you done. Uh... y-you know, we appreciate all you done.
1890 01:20:03,199 01:20:06,435 I mean, the campaign and, uh... I mean, the campaign and, uh...
1891 01:20:06,469 01:20:09,705 I'm just sorry we let you down, but... I'm just sorry we let you down, but...
1892 01:20:09,738 01:20:13,176 well, all I can say is thank you. well, all I can say is thank you.
1893 01:20:13,209 01:20:15,544 Really, Gary, thank you for everything. Really, Gary, thank you for everything.
1894 01:20:15,578 01:20:17,013 It was a hell of a ride. It was a hell of a ride.
1895 01:20:17,046 01:20:20,049 -(both laughing) -GARY: Are you shitting me? -(both laughing) -GARY: Are you shitting me?
1896 01:20:20,083 01:20:22,351 All I have to say is we can't win, All I have to say is we can't win,
1897 01:20:22,385 01:20:24,687 and you're-you're through, you're out. and you're-you're through, you're out.
1898 01:20:24,720 01:20:26,489 -You said we can't win. -Unless. -You said we can't win. -Unless.
1899 01:20:26,522 01:20:28,624 We can't win unless... We can't win unless...
1900 01:20:28,657 01:20:30,226 You didn't let me finish. You didn't let me finish.
1901 01:20:30,259 01:20:33,863 We can't win unless it turns out that this town We can't win unless it turns out that this town
1902 01:20:33,897 01:20:36,499 isn't the Mayberry everybody thinks it is. isn't the Mayberry everybody thinks it is.
1903 01:20:36,532 01:20:38,201 I just got a little piece of intel I just got a little piece of intel
1904 01:20:38,234 01:20:39,869 that's kind of intriguing. that's kind of intriguing.
1905 01:20:39,903 01:20:44,340 So, the mayor's brother Ziggy, he had an Oxy problem. So, the mayor's brother Ziggy, he had an Oxy problem.
1906 01:20:44,373 01:20:47,543 Well, he was a roofer and got hurt on the job. Well, he was a roofer and got hurt on the job.
1907 01:20:47,576 01:20:49,312 Yes, well, what you might not know Yes, well, what you might not know
1908 01:20:49,345 01:20:52,415 is that the mayor pulled some strings, is that the mayor pulled some strings,
1909 01:20:52,448 01:20:55,351 kept him out of jail, got him into rehab. kept him out of jail, got him into rehab.
1910 01:20:55,384 01:20:57,153 That is abuse of power, nepotism. That is abuse of power, nepotism.
1911 01:20:57,186 01:20:59,555 -Probably some clerical shit in there. -(laughs): Come on. -Probably some clerical shit in there. -(laughs): Come on.
1912 01:20:59,588 01:21:01,190 Gary. Gary.
1913 01:21:01,224 01:21:03,026 But we're the good guys, right? But we're the good guys, right?
1914 01:21:03,059 01:21:05,361 Yeah, we're the good guys. Yeah, we're the good guys.
1915 01:21:05,394 01:21:07,730 When they go low... When they go low...
1916 01:21:07,763 01:21:09,398 We go high. We go high.
1917 01:21:09,432 01:21:12,035 Unless we also need to go low, apparently. (chuckles) Unless we also need to go low, apparently. (chuckles)
1918 01:21:12,068 01:21:14,904 Only to keep those who would go lower out of power. Only to keep those who would go lower out of power.
1919 01:21:14,938 01:21:17,406 So, when they go low, we go higher, So, when they go low, we go higher,
1920 01:21:17,440 01:21:19,542 incrementally, in relation to how low they went. incrementally, in relation to how low they went.
1921 01:21:19,575 01:21:21,677 Regrettably, yes. Regrettably, yes.
1922 01:21:21,710 01:21:24,013 When they go low, we go almost as low, When they go low, we go almost as low,
1923 01:21:24,047 01:21:25,681 but we feel worse doing it. but we feel worse doing it.
1924 01:21:25,714 01:21:27,416 You think they thought twice about making your dad You think they thought twice about making your dad
1925 01:21:27,450 01:21:29,785 look like a PTS nutcase? look like a PTS nutcase?
1926 01:21:29,818 01:21:31,220 And I'm going low because And I'm going low because
1927 01:21:31,254 01:21:33,056 I'm gonna tell the truth about the mayor? I'm gonna tell the truth about the mayor?
1928 01:21:33,089 01:21:35,124 His brother's fragile, Gary. His brother's fragile, Gary.
1929 01:21:35,158 01:21:36,559 This town is fragile. This town is fragile.
1930 01:21:36,592 01:21:38,861 The whole area is fragile. Our democracy. The whole area is fragile. Our democracy.
1931 01:21:38,894 01:21:41,697 (scoffs) Stop. We're not doing it. (scoffs) Stop. We're not doing it.
1932 01:21:41,730 01:21:44,100 Okay? People are gonna get hurt. Okay? People are gonna get hurt.
1933 01:21:44,133 01:21:45,935 I'm sorry-- I really am-- I'm sorry-- I really am--
1934 01:21:45,969 01:21:49,072 but sometimes good people have to do shitty things but sometimes good people have to do shitty things
1935 01:21:49,105 01:21:51,407 in service of the greater good. in service of the greater good.
1936 01:21:51,440 01:21:53,109 Isn't that right, Colonel? Isn't that right, Colonel?
1937 01:21:59,582 01:22:01,584 -(door opens) -DIANA: Hey. -(door opens) -DIANA: Hey.
1938 01:22:05,154 01:22:06,322 Hey. Hey.
1939 01:22:06,355 01:22:08,124 Yeah? Yeah?
1940 01:22:08,157 01:22:10,193 -Gary, stop. -(Gary sighs) -Gary, stop. -(Gary sighs)
1941 01:22:11,627 01:22:13,496 (scoffs): What? (scoffs): What?
1942 01:22:13,529 01:22:16,065 Is this politics? Is this politics?
1943 01:22:16,099 01:22:18,301 It's not politics anymore, Diana. It's not politics anymore, Diana.
1944 01:22:18,334 01:22:20,303 It's... it's math. It's... it's math.
1945 01:22:20,336 01:22:21,770 That's what an election is. That's what an election is.
1946 01:22:21,804 01:22:23,106 It's just math. It's just math.
1947 01:22:23,139 01:22:25,808 We need what they get plus one. We need what they get plus one.
1948 01:22:25,841 01:22:27,510 That's all. That's all.
1949 01:22:27,543 01:22:29,478 And if I can't get that And if I can't get that
1950 01:22:29,512 01:22:31,614 by getting more people to vote for your dad, by getting more people to vote for your dad,
1951 01:22:31,647 01:22:35,351 then I have to get fewer people to vote for Braun. then I have to get fewer people to vote for Braun.
1952 01:22:35,384 01:22:36,819 (Gary sighing softly) (Gary sighing softly)
1953 01:22:47,896 01:22:51,467 (vehicle unlocks, door opens) (vehicle unlocks, door opens)
1954 01:22:51,500 01:22:53,836 -(door closes) -(knocking) -(door closes) -(knocking)
1955 01:22:55,338 01:22:57,340 (footsteps approaching) (footsteps approaching)
1956 01:23:00,876 01:23:02,911 (sighs) Hi. (sighs) Hi.
1957 01:23:04,313 01:23:06,849 -Come on in. -Thank you. -Come on in. -Thank you.
1958 01:23:06,882 01:23:08,517 I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.
1959 01:23:11,520 01:23:14,557 I... I'm pulling the plug. I... I'm pulling the plug.
1960 01:23:14,590 01:23:17,126 -Hey, hey. -I mean, we have the money we need. -Hey, hey. -I mean, we have the money we need.
1961 01:23:17,160 01:23:18,961 We have more than we would need. We have more than we would need.
1962 01:23:18,994 01:23:21,897 And this would... destroy your brother. And this would... destroy your brother.
1963 01:23:23,099 01:23:26,335 -And I'm just so sorry. -Hey. -And I'm just so sorry. -Hey.
1964 01:23:27,703 01:23:30,906 You have nothing to be sorry for. You have nothing to be sorry for.
1965 01:23:32,007 01:23:34,810 You saved us, Diana. You saved us, Diana.
1966 01:23:34,843 01:23:37,646 -Mm-hmm. -This place was done. -Mm-hmm. -This place was done.
1967 01:23:37,680 01:23:41,084 Just another town in the middle of nowhere, going nowhere. Just another town in the middle of nowhere, going nowhere.
1968 01:23:41,117 01:23:45,354 And everyone agreed-- yours was the best idea we had. And everyone agreed-- yours was the best idea we had.
1969 01:23:45,388 01:23:48,157 Unless you want to go back to the two Mikes' idea of... Unless you want to go back to the two Mikes' idea of...
1970 01:23:48,191 01:23:50,426 (chuckling): ostrich meat farms. (chuckling): ostrich meat farms.
1971 01:23:51,794 01:23:54,363 Diana, you moving back here, Diana, you moving back here,
1972 01:23:54,397 01:23:56,365 caring so much... caring so much...
1973 01:23:56,399 01:23:58,867 I mean, this whole thing... I mean, this whole thing...
1974 01:23:58,901 01:24:00,403 (Braun sighs) (Braun sighs)
1975 01:24:00,436 01:24:04,840 Well, I just know how proud of you your dad is Well, I just know how proud of you your dad is
1976 01:24:04,873 01:24:07,110 and how proud your mom would be. and how proud your mom would be.
1977 01:24:09,145 01:24:13,616 And how grateful every single one of us are And how grateful every single one of us are
1978 01:24:13,649 01:24:16,452 for what you've done and everything you've given. for what you've done and everything you've given.
1979 01:24:18,221 01:24:20,223 It's working. It's working.
1980 01:24:25,394 01:24:27,396 (sighs): Okay. (sighs): Okay.
1981 01:24:31,600 01:24:33,802 What do we do about Gary? What do we do about Gary?
1982 01:24:34,837 01:24:38,040 Whatever Gary thinks he's got, Whatever Gary thinks he's got,
1983 01:24:38,073 01:24:40,343 why don't we just give him something better? why don't we just give him something better?
1984 01:24:47,950 01:24:49,585 (sighs) (sighs)
1985 01:24:49,618 01:24:51,620 (footsteps in hallway) (footsteps in hallway)
1986 01:25:04,367 01:25:05,901 Hmm. Hmm.
1987 01:25:05,934 01:25:07,670 GARY: No, forget the rehab thing. GARY: No, forget the rehab thing.
1988 01:25:07,703 01:25:09,972 This is bigger. Obviously, you can't use my name, so just-- This is bigger. Obviously, you can't use my name, so just--
1989 01:25:10,005 01:25:12,175 "Senior official with inside knowledge "Senior official with inside knowledge
1990 01:25:12,208 01:25:13,742 of campaign strategy." of campaign strategy."
1991 01:25:13,776 01:25:15,311 Yes, you are welcome. Yes, you are welcome.
1992 01:25:15,344 01:25:16,612 KURT: Tell me they're running it. KURT: Tell me they're running it.
1993 01:25:16,645 01:25:18,147 -They are running it. -Oh, yeah, baby! -They are running it. -Oh, yeah, baby!
1994 01:25:18,181 01:25:20,015 -Shit's gonna hit the fan. -Oh, it feels good. -Shit's gonna hit the fan. -Oh, it feels good.
1995 01:25:20,048 01:25:22,084 Now, the word of the day is "disappointed." Now, the word of the day is "disappointed."
1996 01:25:22,117 01:25:24,587 We are not mad at the mayor. We are not shocked. We are not mad at the mayor. We are not shocked.
1997 01:25:24,620 01:25:26,489 -We're just disappointed. -Yeah, I am disappointed. -We're just disappointed. -Yeah, I am disappointed.
1998 01:25:26,522 01:25:28,424 -I'm disappointed, too. -I mean, it's disappointing. -I'm disappointed, too. -I mean, it's disappointing.
1999 01:25:28,457 01:25:30,626 -It is. You know what, he's the mayor. -He betrayed us. -It is. You know what, he's the mayor. -He betrayed us.
2000 01:25:30,659 01:25:32,261 GARY: He betrayed us, and it's disappointing. GARY: He betrayed us, and it's disappointing.
2001 01:25:32,295 01:25:33,862 -KURT: I'm hurt. -But I'm not mad. -KURT: I'm hurt. -But I'm not mad.
2002 01:25:33,896 01:25:35,998 -KURT: No, I'm just disappointed. -Me, too. -KURT: No, I'm just disappointed. -Me, too.
2003 01:25:36,031 01:25:37,466 Tonight, we have this picture Tonight, we have this picture
2004 01:25:37,500 01:25:39,034 of the alleged ten-year-old love child of the alleged ten-year-old love child
2005 01:25:39,067 01:25:41,304 of the Wisconsin mayor and the girl's mother. of the Wisconsin mayor and the girl's mother.
2006 01:25:41,337 01:25:43,839 We've obscured the child's face to protect her identity We've obscured the child's face to protect her identity
2007 01:25:43,872 01:25:45,140 but left enough clues but left enough clues
2008 01:25:45,174 01:25:47,343 so that you can probably figure it out. so that you can probably figure it out.
2009 01:25:47,376 01:25:49,378 NEWSWOMAN: To discuss this important, late-breaking story, NEWSWOMAN: To discuss this important, late-breaking story,
2010 01:25:49,412 01:25:51,280 we go to our panel with a feature we go to our panel with a feature
2011 01:25:51,314 01:25:55,451 you'll only see here on CNN: the Duodecabox. you'll only see here on CNN: the Duodecabox.
2012 01:25:55,484 01:25:58,521 What do you think, Phil, Diane, Liz, Carl, What do you think, Phil, Diane, Liz, Carl,
2013 01:25:58,554 01:26:00,823 Barbara and... let's say Craig? Barbara and... let's say Craig?
2014 01:26:00,856 01:26:02,891 (all talking at once) (all talking at once)
2015 01:26:05,861 01:26:07,763 (Faith grunts angrily) (Faith grunts angrily)
2016 01:26:10,733 01:26:12,568 Kaylee? Kaylee?
2017 01:26:12,601 01:26:14,002 -Kaylee. -Y-Yeah. -Kaylee. -Y-Yeah.
2018 01:26:14,036 01:26:15,838 -Can you clean this up, please? -Oh, sure. -Can you clean this up, please? -Oh, sure.
2019 01:26:15,871 01:26:18,040 It was an accident with the sandwich. Thank you. It was an accident with the sandwich. Thank you.
2020 01:26:31,287 01:26:33,289 (indistinct chatter) (indistinct chatter)
2021 01:26:42,130 01:26:43,699 Hey, man. Hey, man.
2022 01:26:43,732 01:26:45,601 Can I talk to you about white power? Can I talk to you about white power?
2023 01:26:45,634 01:26:47,636 (indistinct chatter) (indistinct chatter)
2024 01:26:48,937 01:26:50,439 MAN: Yeah, guns save lives. MAN: Yeah, guns save lives.
2025 01:26:50,473 01:26:51,807 -Thank you, sir. -Thank you. -Thank you, sir. -Thank you.
2026 01:27:00,749 01:27:02,385 It has been a hard-fought campaign, It has been a hard-fought campaign,
2027 01:27:02,418 01:27:04,553 but now it's in the hands of the voters. but now it's in the hands of the voters.
2028 01:27:04,587 01:27:06,922 And excuse me-- there's the Colonel right there. And excuse me-- there's the Colonel right there.
2029 01:27:06,955 01:27:08,223 -(Jack chuckling) -Colonel, come on in. -(Jack chuckling) -Colonel, come on in.
2030 01:27:08,257 01:27:09,425 -Diana. -Hi. -Hi. Good morning. -Diana. -Hi. -Hi. Good morning.
2031 01:27:09,458 01:27:10,559 Did you get some rest? Did you get some rest?
2032 01:27:10,593 01:27:12,094 Yeah, we got a little bit. Yeah, we got a little bit.
2033 01:27:12,127 01:27:13,596 -Excuse us, folks. -Good morning. Good morning. -Excuse us, folks. -Good morning. Good morning.
2034 01:27:13,629 01:27:15,864 -Excuse us. Excuse us. -(reporters clamoring) -Excuse us. Excuse us. -(reporters clamoring)
2035 01:27:15,898 01:27:17,266 BRAUN: There he is. BRAUN: There he is.
2036 01:27:17,300 01:27:18,801 -Billy. Hey. -Colonel, good to see you, sir. -Billy. Hey. -Colonel, good to see you, sir.
2037 01:27:18,834 01:27:20,303 -How are you? How are you? -Good to see you. -How are you? How are you? -Good to see you.
2038 01:27:20,336 01:27:21,570 How about a picture? How about a picture?
2039 01:27:21,604 01:27:23,105 -All righty. -(chuckles) -All righty. -(chuckles)
2040 01:27:23,138 01:27:24,373 FAITH: Come on. Come on. FAITH: Come on. Come on.
2041 01:27:24,407 01:27:25,641 -Let's go. Let's go. -Thank you. -Let's go. Let's go. -Thank you.
2042 01:27:25,674 01:27:27,543 Oh, make sure you get this guy's I.D. Oh, make sure you get this guy's I.D.
2043 01:27:27,576 01:27:29,044 -(laughter) -FAITH: Okay. -(laughter) -FAITH: Okay.
2044 01:27:29,077 01:27:30,713 Billy, we're just talking to Fox. Just Fox. Billy, we're just talking to Fox. Just Fox.
2045 01:27:30,746 01:27:33,382 -JACK: Hello. Good morning. -Good morning, Jack. -JACK: Hello. Good morning. -Good morning, Jack.
2046 01:27:33,416 01:27:35,484 -Sign right there. -Yeah. All right. -Sign right there. -Yeah. All right.
2047 01:27:35,518 01:27:36,952 Your dad is really something. Your dad is really something.
2048 01:27:36,985 01:27:38,421 -(chuckling): Yeah. -He's done a great job. -(chuckling): Yeah. -He's done a great job.
2049 01:27:38,454 01:27:39,788 -Yeah, yeah. -JACK: Go over here? -Yeah, yeah. -JACK: Go over here?
2050 01:27:39,822 01:27:41,424 So have you. Thank you for everything. So have you. Thank you for everything.
2051 01:27:41,457 01:27:42,758 -It's been... -My pleasure. -It's been... -My pleasure.
2052 01:27:42,791 01:27:44,159 -So... -I was thinking, maybe later, -So... -I was thinking, maybe later,
2053 01:27:44,192 01:27:46,061 if you want to watch the returns come in? if you want to watch the returns come in?
2054 01:27:46,094 01:27:48,196 Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, I'd love to. Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, I'd love to.
2055 01:27:49,632 01:27:51,934 Oh. Oh, shoot. Oh. Oh, shoot.
2056 01:27:51,967 01:27:54,269 You know what? I have to head back to the farm, You know what? I have to head back to the farm,
2057 01:27:54,303 01:27:55,738 -but I'll see you later, okay? -Okay. -but I'll see you later, okay? -Okay.
2058 01:27:55,771 01:27:57,440 Okay. Okay.
2059 01:27:57,473 01:27:59,608 Diana, aren't you gonna vote? Diana, aren't you gonna vote?
2060 01:28:06,615 01:28:08,183 GARY: Nothing? GARY: Nothing?
2061 01:28:08,216 01:28:10,285 -No early returns? -MAN: Nothing. -No early returns? -MAN: Nothing.
2062 01:28:10,319 01:28:12,521 -What about exit polling? -No exit polling. -What about exit polling? -No exit polling.
2063 01:28:12,555 01:28:13,989 Well, is there another precinct? Well, is there another precinct?
2064 01:28:14,022 01:28:15,157 No. No.
2065 01:28:15,190 01:28:16,592 Well, where else can they vote? Well, where else can they vote?
2066 01:28:16,625 01:28:17,860 Well, they can't vote anywhere else. Well, they can't vote anywhere else.
2067 01:28:17,893 01:28:19,362 Was it all early voting? Was it all early voting?
2068 01:28:19,395 01:28:21,296 No early voting, no. Nothing. No early voting, no. Nothing.
2069 01:28:21,330 01:28:23,098 What do you mean, nobody has voted yet? What do you mean, nobody has voted yet?
2070 01:28:23,131 01:28:24,500 Uh, big guy. Uh, big guy.
2071 01:28:24,533 01:28:25,868 You're gonna want to see this. You're gonna want to see this.
2072 01:28:25,901 01:28:27,169 ...smear Mayor Braun with the falsehood ...smear Mayor Braun with the falsehood
2073 01:28:27,202 01:28:28,637 of an illegitimate child. of an illegitimate child.
2074 01:28:28,671 01:28:30,706 Which, as the report you just read stated, Which, as the report you just read stated,
2075 01:28:30,739 01:28:32,841 is actually the man's dear niece. is actually the man's dear niece.
2076 01:28:32,875 01:28:35,110 Has the Hastings campaign apologized? Has the Hastings campaign apologized?
2077 01:28:35,143 01:28:37,212 FAITH: Uh, no, they haven't, and it-it's too late for that. FAITH: Uh, no, they haven't, and it-it's too late for that.
2078 01:28:37,245 01:28:38,981 -GARY: Oh, fuck! -Mayor Braun continues to -GARY: Oh, fuck! -Mayor Braun continues to
2079 01:28:39,014 01:28:40,516 focus on the issues. focus on the issues.
2080 01:28:40,549 01:28:41,950 And quite frankly, Brooke, And quite frankly, Brooke,
2081 01:28:41,984 01:28:43,852 the media owes the mayor an apology, as well, the media owes the mayor an apology, as well,
2082 01:28:43,886 01:28:46,389 for credulously covering a poorly sourced story. for credulously covering a poorly sourced story.
2083 01:28:46,422 01:28:48,223 Faith! Congratulations. Well done. Faith! Congratulations. Well done.
2084 01:28:48,256 01:28:50,192 -What the fuck are you doing? -A new low. -What the fuck are you doing? -A new low.
2085 01:28:50,225 01:28:51,860 Oh, yeah, like I leaked a cocked-up story Oh, yeah, like I leaked a cocked-up story
2086 01:28:51,894 01:28:53,529 about a bastard child who happens to be about a bastard child who happens to be
2087 01:28:53,562 01:28:54,963 the man's fucking niece. the man's fucking niece.
2088 01:28:54,997 01:28:56,365 -Please, Gary. -You fed me that bullshit. -Please, Gary. -You fed me that bullshit.
2089 01:28:56,399 01:28:57,500 You know, go fuck yourself. You know, go fuck yourself.
2090 01:28:57,533 01:28:59,034 -You go fuck yourself. -You go fuck your... -You go fuck yourself. -You go fuck your...
2091 01:28:59,067 01:29:00,302 BROOKE (chuckling): Okay, you two. BROOKE (chuckling): Okay, you two.
2092 01:29:00,335 01:29:02,004 Unfortunately, we're gonna have to leave it there. Unfortunately, we're gonna have to leave it there.
2093 01:29:02,037 01:29:03,472 Thank you so much, Brooke. Thank you so much, Brooke.
2094 01:29:03,506 01:29:04,707 -Thank you so much. -Thanks, Brooke. -Thank you so much. -Thanks, Brooke.
2095 01:29:04,740 01:29:05,808 -Thank you. -CAMERAMAN: We're clear. -Thank you. -CAMERAMAN: We're clear.
2096 01:29:05,841 01:29:08,043 Why would I leak this? Huh? Why would I leak this? Huh?
2097 01:29:08,076 01:29:09,745 Oh, to just make me take the bait. Oh, to just make me take the bait.
2098 01:29:09,778 01:29:11,346 You didn't just want to win. You didn't just want to win.
2099 01:29:11,380 01:29:13,215 You wanted to castrate me, didn't you? You wanted to castrate me, didn't you?
2100 01:29:13,248 01:29:14,683 If I wanted to cut your dick off, If I wanted to cut your dick off,
2101 01:29:14,717 01:29:16,385 I would have done it in front of you I would have done it in front of you
2102 01:29:16,419 01:29:19,121 just to see the last look of horror in your eyes. just to see the last look of horror in your eyes.
2103 01:29:20,122 01:29:21,690 You're telling the truth. You're telling the truth.
2104 01:29:21,724 01:29:23,325 No shit. No shit.
2105 01:29:23,358 01:29:25,227 What the fuck is going on here? What the fuck is going on here?
2106 01:29:25,260 01:29:26,529 BECCA: Evan? BECCA: Evan?
2107 01:29:26,562 01:29:27,896 What... What...
2108 01:29:27,930 01:29:29,097 Evan. Evan.
2109 01:29:29,131 01:29:30,232 (laughing): Evan, oh, my God. (laughing): Evan, oh, my God.
2110 01:29:30,265 01:29:31,600 -What's up, Becca? -How the hell are you? -What's up, Becca? -How the hell are you?
2111 01:29:31,634 01:29:33,168 -Hiya. Nice to see you. -Good to see you. -Hiya. Nice to see you. -Good to see you.
2112 01:29:33,201 01:29:35,170 -How's everything? -Yeah, I mean, it's going. -How's everything? -Yeah, I mean, it's going.
2113 01:29:35,203 01:29:37,272 What the hell? What the hell?
2114 01:29:37,305 01:29:39,207 How the hell does he know her? How the hell does he know her?
2115 01:29:39,241 01:29:40,776 Is he from here? Is he from here?
2116 01:29:40,809 01:29:43,879 Gary, look at his shoes. I mean, really. Gary, look at his shoes. I mean, really.
2117 01:29:43,912 01:29:45,914 And we have Alan to thank for bringing this man And we have Alan to thank for bringing this man
2118 01:29:45,948 01:29:47,282 -to our attention. -It's Evan. -to our attention. -It's Evan.
2119 01:29:47,315 01:29:48,717 Did I happen to mention that... Did I happen to mention that...
2120 01:29:48,751 01:29:51,086 Holy shit. Holy shit.
2121 01:29:51,119 01:29:53,422 -What? What? -Come on! -What? What? -Come on!
2122 01:29:53,456 01:29:57,893 ALDERMAN: So, with 100% of the vote counted, ALDERMAN: So, with 100% of the vote counted,
2123 01:29:57,926 01:30:01,396 the mayoral race is tied. the mayoral race is tied.
2124 01:30:01,430 01:30:03,532 -(laughter) -One vote to one vote. -(laughter) -One vote to one vote.
2125 01:30:03,566 01:30:05,067 (cheering) (cheering)
2126 01:30:05,100 01:30:06,435 GARY: No. GARY: No.
2127 01:30:06,469 01:30:08,771 Okay, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Okay, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
2128 01:30:08,804 01:30:11,073 Wait, wait, wait. Hold on, hold on, hold on. Wait, wait, wait. Hold on, hold on, hold on.
2129 01:30:11,106 01:30:12,908 Hold on. I, uh... Hold on. I, uh...
2130 01:30:12,941 01:30:15,277 I don't... I don't know exactly I don't... I don't know exactly
2131 01:30:15,310 01:30:18,280 what's going on here, but it's weird. what's going on here, but it's weird.
2132 01:30:18,313 01:30:19,782 Could somebody please explain to me Could somebody please explain to me
2133 01:30:19,815 01:30:21,484 -what's happening? -Well, we had an election. -what's happening? -Well, we had an election.
2134 01:30:21,517 01:30:23,719 -Yes, I know that. -And we gave it our best. -Yes, I know that. -And we gave it our best.
2135 01:30:23,752 01:30:24,920 Just didn't work out. Just didn't work out.
2136 01:30:24,953 01:30:26,455 Didn't work out, Jack? Come on. Didn't work out, Jack? Come on.
2137 01:30:26,489 01:30:28,624 Do you know how much money we invested in this? Do you know how much money we invested in this?
2138 01:30:28,657 01:30:30,559 Yeah, if the news media is to be believed, Yeah, if the news media is to be believed,
2139 01:30:30,593 01:30:34,497 more than $45 million was raised between the two of you. more than $45 million was raised between the two of you.
2140 01:30:34,530 01:30:36,098 -(laughing) -(cheering, applause) -(laughing) -(cheering, applause)
2141 01:30:40,168 01:30:42,605 (laughing) (laughing)
2142 01:30:42,638 01:30:45,674 Oh, shit. Oh, shit.
2143 01:30:45,708 01:30:47,743 Did you sucker me, Jack? Did you sucker me, Jack?
2144 01:30:47,776 01:30:49,845 I guess. I guess.
2145 01:30:49,878 01:30:51,914 GARY: You know what? Folks, sorry, GARY: You know what? Folks, sorry,
2146 01:30:51,947 01:30:53,248 but I'm getting all that money back. but I'm getting all that money back.
2147 01:30:53,281 01:30:54,316 From where? From where?
2148 01:30:54,349 01:30:56,685 We put millions into those PACs. We put millions into those PACs.
2149 01:30:56,719 01:30:58,621 Well, campaign finance law says Well, campaign finance law says
2150 01:30:58,654 01:31:00,856 that money needn't be accounted for. that money needn't be accounted for.
2151 01:31:00,889 01:31:02,991 -(laughter, applause) -Oh, my God. -(laughter, applause) -Oh, my God.
2152 01:31:03,025 01:31:05,027 I got to give it to this place. I got to give it to this place.
2153 01:31:06,061 01:31:08,163 Hey, Alan. Hey, Alan.
2154 01:31:08,196 01:31:09,331 Uh, it's Evan. Uh, it's Evan.
2155 01:31:09,364 01:31:10,633 Shit weasel. Shit weasel.
2156 01:31:10,666 01:31:12,501 You're from this town, aren't you? You're from this town, aren't you?
2157 01:31:12,535 01:31:14,469 -Yeah. -You set this whole thing up. -Yeah. -You set this whole thing up.
2158 01:31:14,503 01:31:16,038 You set me up, huh? You set me up, huh?
2159 01:31:16,071 01:31:18,807 You are so fired, and you're going to jail! You are so fired, and you're going to jail!
2160 01:31:18,841 01:31:20,142 Hey. Hey, hey, hey, hey. Hey. Hey, hey, hey, hey.
2161 01:31:20,175 01:31:21,777 It was me. I did it. It was me. I did it.
2162 01:31:21,810 01:31:23,211 You? You?
2163 01:31:24,412 01:31:25,948 (scoffs): Wh... (scoffs): Wh...
2164 01:31:25,981 01:31:27,315 Why? Why?
2165 01:31:27,349 01:31:29,351 You know... You know...
2166 01:31:29,384 01:31:32,387 (laughing): it was just this weird idea I had (laughing): it was just this weird idea I had
2167 01:31:32,420 01:31:34,289 'cause the town needed money. 'cause the town needed money.
2168 01:31:34,322 01:31:36,625 (chuckles) So you... (chuckles) So you...
2169 01:31:36,659 01:31:38,160 Uh, shot the video, Uh, shot the video,
2170 01:31:38,193 01:31:41,296 and then had Evan show it to you. and then had Evan show it to you.
2171 01:31:41,329 01:31:42,464 Uh, I... Uh, I...
2172 01:31:42,497 01:31:45,133 We needed 750 grand over three years We needed 750 grand over three years
2173 01:31:45,167 01:31:46,969 to keep the school from closing down. to keep the school from closing down.
2174 01:31:47,002 01:31:48,904 We blew way past that. We blew way past that.
2175 01:31:48,937 01:31:51,273 We got enough to buy back the base, redevelop it. We got enough to buy back the base, redevelop it.
2176 01:31:52,875 01:31:56,478 And the speech, the viral speech? And the speech, the viral speech?
2177 01:31:56,511 01:31:58,046 BRAUN: Can I get a motion to vote? BRAUN: Can I get a motion to vote?
2178 01:31:58,080 01:31:59,347 JACK: Actually, I'm here about that... JACK: Actually, I'm here about that...
2179 01:31:59,381 01:32:01,650 Fuck, what's the word? Resolution. Fuck, what's the word? Resolution.
2180 01:32:01,684 01:32:04,152 -I'll get it. -DIANA: Mike, do you want to help him and... -I'll get it. -DIANA: Mike, do you want to help him and...
2181 01:32:04,186 01:32:05,520 Yeah. Yeah.
2182 01:32:05,554 01:32:07,422 Just have it low enough. Just have it low enough.
2183 01:32:07,455 01:32:09,057 BRAUN: Just leave enough room for that road sign in there. BRAUN: Just leave enough room for that road sign in there.
2184 01:32:09,091 01:32:10,693 -Uh, am I supposed to have these on? -DIANA: No glasses. -Uh, am I supposed to have these on? -DIANA: No glasses.
2185 01:32:10,726 01:32:13,361 -I'm lost. -(laughter) -I'm lost. -(laughter)
2186 01:32:13,395 01:32:14,730 DIANA (sighs): Okay, Dad, that's good, DIANA (sighs): Okay, Dad, that's good,
2187 01:32:14,763 01:32:16,364 but you have to leave after. but you have to leave after.
2188 01:32:16,398 01:32:17,399 All right, one more time. All right, one more time.
2189 01:32:17,432 01:32:19,768 I guess they weren't principles. I guess they weren't principles.
2190 01:32:21,203 01:32:23,305 They're just hobbies. They're just hobbies.
2191 01:32:30,445 01:32:32,514 DIANA: Holy shit, I think we got it. DIANA: Holy shit, I think we got it.
2192 01:32:32,547 01:32:34,583 -(laughter, cheering) -Oh, thank God. -(laughter, cheering) -Oh, thank God.
2193 01:32:40,555 01:32:43,158 (cheering, whooping) (cheering, whooping)
2194 01:32:46,729 01:32:48,864 That was really just baiting the hook. That was really just baiting the hook.
2195 01:32:48,897 01:32:51,399 You guys took it from there. I was never expecting her. You guys took it from there. I was never expecting her.
2196 01:32:51,433 01:32:53,335 Oh, I had a fucking blast. Oh, I had a fucking blast.
2197 01:32:54,837 01:32:56,772 So you used me. So you used me.
2198 01:32:58,774 01:33:00,542 We used you? We used you?
2199 01:33:00,575 01:33:03,545 You guys only show up here once every four years, You guys only show up here once every four years,
2200 01:33:03,578 01:33:05,814 and only then 'cause it's a swing state. and only then 'cause it's a swing state.
2201 01:33:05,848 01:33:08,416 And then, when it's over, you're gone. And then, when it's over, you're gone.
2202 01:33:08,450 01:33:09,818 But we're still here But we're still here
2203 01:33:09,852 01:33:12,254 with all the same problems we had before, with all the same problems we had before,
2204 01:33:12,287 01:33:14,122 just waiting around for you to come back just waiting around for you to come back
2205 01:33:14,156 01:33:16,859 and make the same empty promises as last time. and make the same empty promises as last time.
2206 01:33:17,926 01:33:19,728 We used the system. We used the system.
2207 01:33:19,762 01:33:21,296 You make millions of dollars You make millions of dollars
2208 01:33:21,329 01:33:22,965 funneling tens of millions of dollars funneling tens of millions of dollars
2209 01:33:22,998 01:33:27,169 into this election economy. into this election economy.
2210 01:33:27,202 01:33:30,272 All we did is take a cut. All we did is take a cut.
2211 01:33:31,707 01:33:33,608 Hmm. Hmm.
2212 01:33:33,642 01:33:35,010 Well... Well...
2213 01:33:35,043 01:33:37,646 I guess I just... I guess I just...
2214 01:33:37,680 01:33:42,450 I thought that maybe you and I had a little something. I thought that maybe you and I had a little something.
2215 01:33:42,484 01:33:44,219 (chuckles softly) (chuckles softly)
2216 01:33:46,955 01:33:49,825 (chuckling): I'm 28. I mean... (chuckling): I'm 28. I mean...
2217 01:33:49,858 01:33:53,696 In what world would this be okay? In what world would this be okay?
2218 01:33:55,964 01:33:58,166 D.C. and L.A., parts of New York, D.C. and L.A., parts of New York,
2219 01:33:58,200 01:33:59,968 -Miami, maybe Dallas. -Mm. -Miami, maybe Dallas. -Mm.
2220 01:34:00,002 01:34:02,037 (chuckles) (chuckles)
2221 01:34:02,070 01:34:04,072 Look... Look...
2222 01:34:05,173 01:34:07,542 -It wasn't personal. -Mm. -It wasn't personal. -Mm.
2223 01:34:07,575 01:34:09,177 It was math. It was math.
2224 01:34:09,211 01:34:10,813 Math. Math.
2225 01:34:12,047 01:34:15,984 But this system, the way we elect people, But this system, the way we elect people,
2226 01:34:16,018 01:34:17,986 it's terrifying. it's terrifying.
2227 01:34:18,020 01:34:20,022 And exhausting. And exhausting.
2228 01:34:20,055 01:34:23,225 And I think it's driving us all insane. And I think it's driving us all insane.
2229 01:34:26,528 01:34:27,930 (chuckles) (chuckles)
2230 01:34:31,666 01:34:33,401 BIG MIKE: You know what the real problem here BIG MIKE: You know what the real problem here
2231 01:34:33,435 01:34:35,403 is that the media is completely complicit is that the media is completely complicit
2232 01:34:35,437 01:34:37,172 -in this sort of thing. -Oh, I absolutely agree. -in this sort of thing. -Oh, I absolutely agree.
2233 01:34:37,205 01:34:38,540 I mean, it's like Neil Postman said-- I mean, it's like Neil Postman said--
2234 01:34:38,573 01:34:39,975 in entertaining ourselves, in entertaining ourselves,
2235 01:34:40,008 01:34:41,744 -news has become entertainment. -Yeah. Yeah. -news has become entertainment. -Yeah. Yeah.
2236 01:34:41,777 01:34:43,712 -And when that happens... (sputters) it's gone. -Yeah. -And when that happens... (sputters) it's gone. -Yeah.
2237 01:34:43,746 01:34:45,347 I thought he knew. I mean, I would get so nervous I thought he knew. I mean, I would get so nervous
2238 01:34:45,380 01:34:47,049 -every time he would come in. I would just, like... -Oh, no. -every time he would come in. I would just, like... -Oh, no.
2239 01:34:47,082 01:34:48,316 I couldn't get my coffee order right, I couldn't get my coffee order right,
2240 01:34:48,350 01:34:49,684 and I was giving him the wrong thing. and I was giving him the wrong thing.
2241 01:34:49,718 01:34:51,086 Oh, you were great. You were perfect. Oh, you were great. You were perfect.
2242 01:34:51,119 01:34:52,554 Plus, you know, he has, you know, Plus, you know, he has, you know,
2243 01:34:52,587 01:34:54,222 dreamy eyes a little bit, so, I mean... dreamy eyes a little bit, so, I mean...
2244 01:34:54,256 01:34:55,724 -Yeah. -He's-he's dashing. -Yeah. -He's-he's dashing.
2245 01:34:55,758 01:34:57,926 He actually made me cry. He actually made me cry.
2246 01:34:57,960 01:35:00,395 -He was, like, a shithead. -Yeah. -He was, like, a shithead. -Yeah.
2247 01:35:00,428 01:35:02,197 It metastasizes, so it-it's growing It metastasizes, so it-it's growing
2248 01:35:02,230 01:35:03,565 -and-and whatever, so... -Yeah. -and-and whatever, so... -Yeah.
2249 01:35:03,598 01:35:05,033 Well, it becomes... it's sort of like Well, it becomes... it's sort of like
2250 01:35:05,067 01:35:06,368 any sort of autoimmune disorder. any sort of autoimmune disorder.
2251 01:35:06,401 01:35:07,702 -Yeah. -It's like... it's like lupus. -Yeah. -It's like... it's like lupus.
2252 01:35:07,736 01:35:09,004 Know what I mean? Know what I mean?
2253 01:35:09,037 01:35:10,505 That's actually a really great metaphor. That's actually a really great metaphor.
2254 01:35:10,538 01:35:12,374 -That's... that's like... -It's a simile. -That's... that's like... -It's a simile.
2255 01:35:12,407 01:35:13,842 -'Cause you said... -'Cause I said... -'Cause you said... -'Cause I said...
2256 01:35:13,876 01:35:15,543 -I said it's "like." -You said it's "like." -I said it's "like." -You said it's "like."
2257 01:35:15,577 01:35:16,912 Yeah, right. It's like lupus. Yeah, right. It's like lupus.
2258 01:35:18,313 01:35:21,083 What a clusterfuck. What a clusterfuck.
2259 01:35:21,116 01:35:23,118 Amen. Amen.
2260 01:35:27,455 01:35:29,024 DIANA: How we looking? DIANA: How we looking?
2261 01:35:29,057 01:35:31,960 Well, they're saying these, uh, back acres Well, they're saying these, uh, back acres
2262 01:35:31,994 01:35:35,463 are gonna become the over-55 community health center. are gonna become the over-55 community health center.
2263 01:35:35,497 01:35:37,265 -Uh-huh. -Madison has promised -Uh-huh. -Madison has promised
2264 01:35:37,299 01:35:38,934 a satellite campus for the front. a satellite campus for the front.
2265 01:35:38,967 01:35:41,103 Okay. And you know that we have to redo Okay. And you know that we have to redo
2266 01:35:41,136 01:35:42,570 the septic on the back 50? the septic on the back 50?
2267 01:35:42,604 01:35:43,872 -We heard all about it. -Okay. -We heard all about it. -Okay.
2268 01:35:43,906 01:35:44,940 Hey, you. Hey, you.
2269 01:35:44,973 01:35:46,408 Oh, hey, you. Oh, hey, you.
2270 01:35:46,441 01:35:49,111 -(chuckling) -She is something, huh? -(chuckling) -She is something, huh?
2271 01:35:55,250 01:35:57,252 DIANA: Are you listening to me? DIANA: Are you listening to me?
2272 01:35:59,922 01:36:01,924 (Faith's voice): Are you listening to me? (Faith's voice): Are you listening to me?
2273 01:36:03,325 01:36:05,627 ANN: Are you listening to me? ANN: Are you listening to me?
2274 01:36:05,660 01:36:06,995 Oh, Gary, honey. Oh, Gary, honey.
2275 01:36:07,029 01:36:08,563 (sighs) I'm just so excited. (sighs) I'm just so excited.
2276 01:36:08,596 01:36:10,632 I can't wait till we get the café tables in. I can't wait till we get the café tables in.
2277 01:36:10,665 01:36:14,636 I think people are really gonna like those a lot, you know? I think people are really gonna like those a lot, you know?
2278 01:36:14,669 01:36:17,806 -And then we can put the umbrellas up. -Mm-hmm. -And then we can put the umbrellas up. -Mm-hmm.
2279 01:36:17,840 01:36:20,642 And people can just sit outside and have coffee and... And people can just sit outside and have coffee and...
2280 01:36:20,675 01:36:21,910 You know. You know.
2281 01:36:21,944 01:36:23,345 Are you... are you listening to me? Are you... are you listening to me?
2282 01:36:23,378 01:36:25,680 -Mm-hmm, mm... -Are you listening to me? -Mm-hmm, mm... -Are you listening to me?
2283 01:36:25,713 01:36:27,950 (Faith's voice): Hey, fuckup. Hey, fuckup. (Faith's voice): Hey, fuckup. Hey, fuckup.
2284 01:36:27,983 01:36:30,752 -Are you listening to me? -GARY: Yes, yes, yes. -Are you listening to me? -GARY: Yes, yes, yes.
2285 01:36:30,785 01:36:32,354 I'm listening to you. I'm listening to you.
2286 01:36:32,387 01:36:34,957 You don't open a dossier for less than $2 million. You don't open a dossier for less than $2 million.
2287 01:36:34,990 01:36:37,659 I know. That's what I'm talking to them about right now. I know. That's what I'm talking to them about right now.
2288 01:36:37,692 01:36:39,027 $2 million. $2 million.
2289 01:36:39,061 01:36:40,628 God, I hate you. God, I hate you.
2290 01:36:40,662 01:36:42,264 Ditto. Ditto.
2291 01:36:44,299 01:36:46,134 MAN (over phone): Gary? MAN (over phone): Gary?
2292 01:36:46,168 01:36:48,470 Gary, you there? Gary, you there?
2293 01:36:48,503 01:36:50,538 Gary? Gary?
2294 01:36:50,572 01:36:52,474 Yo, Gary. Yo, Gary.
2295 01:36:54,709 01:36:55,978 Ah, cheers! Ah, cheers!
2296 01:36:56,011 01:36:58,046 (excited chatter) (excited chatter)
2297 01:37:20,368 01:37:22,804 Colonel Jack Hastings, Deerlaken-- Colonel Jack Hastings, Deerlaken--
2298 01:37:22,837 01:37:24,873 did the media fall for a false narrative did the media fall for a false narrative
2299 01:37:24,907 01:37:27,142 just because it fit into our preconceived notion just because it fit into our preconceived notion
2300 01:37:27,175 01:37:29,711 of the divide of this country between red and blue of the divide of this country between red and blue
2301 01:37:29,744 01:37:31,914 without actually checking the facts? without actually checking the facts?
2302 01:37:31,947 01:37:33,916 Were we irresponsible? Were we irresponsible?
2303 01:37:33,949 01:37:35,250 Well, we're the news. Well, we're the news.
2304 01:37:35,283 01:37:37,920 Are we not supposed to cover the news? Are we not supposed to cover the news?
2305 01:37:37,953 01:37:39,922 I mean, these are newsworthy stories. I mean, these are newsworthy stories.
2306 01:37:39,955 01:37:42,357 We're absolutely in the right to cover them. We're absolutely in the right to cover them.
2307 01:37:42,390 01:37:46,061 It is literally our job to cover the news. It is literally our job to cover the news.
2308 01:37:46,094 01:37:47,395 But isn't there a way to report the news But isn't there a way to report the news
2309 01:37:47,429 01:37:48,997 without so much speculation, without so much speculation,
2310 01:37:49,031 01:37:51,066 without a false sense of urgency without a false sense of urgency
2311 01:37:51,099 01:37:53,902 that causes us to breathlessly report "facts" that causes us to breathlessly report "facts"
2312 01:37:53,936 01:37:55,437 that maybe are not facts? that maybe are not facts?
2313 01:37:55,470 01:37:57,505 And are we framing these stories And are we framing these stories
2314 01:37:57,539 01:37:59,574 on an artificial right-left axis on an artificial right-left axis
2315 01:37:59,607 01:38:02,444 because that's how our pundit economy is set up? because that's how our pundit economy is set up?
2316 01:38:02,477 01:38:04,446 Is there a better way to do this? Is there a better way to do this?
2317 01:38:09,985 01:38:11,186 I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding.
2318 01:38:11,219 01:38:12,787 Unfortunately, we have to leave it there. Unfortunately, we have to leave it there.
2319 01:38:12,820 01:38:14,957 -Thank you all for watching. -(laughing): She's... -Thank you all for watching. -(laughing): She's...
2320 01:38:14,990 01:38:16,791 MAN (laughing): She's good. MAN (laughing): She's good.
2321 01:38:16,824 01:38:19,827 ("Mess Is Mine" by Vance Joy playing) ("Mess Is Mine" by Vance Joy playing)
2322 01:38:22,797 01:38:25,233 * Talking like we used to do * Talking like we used to do
2323 01:38:26,801 01:38:29,237 * It was always me and you * It was always me and you
2324 01:38:30,638 01:38:34,442 * Hold on, darling * Hold on, darling
2325 01:38:35,810 01:38:38,080 * This body is yours * This body is yours
2326 01:38:38,113 01:38:42,250 * This body is yours and mine * This body is yours and mine
2327 01:38:43,651 01:38:49,091 * Well, hold on, my darling * Well, hold on, my darling
2328 01:38:49,124 01:38:51,826 * This mess was yours * This mess was yours
2329 01:38:53,261 01:38:56,464 * Now your mess is mine * Now your mess is mine
2330 01:39:02,204 01:39:05,873 * Ah-ooh * Ah-ooh
2331 01:39:07,375 01:39:10,278 * Your mess is mine * Your mess is mine
2332 01:39:10,312 01:39:12,614 * See you in the marketplace... * * See you in the marketplace... *
2333 01:39:12,647 01:39:15,283 JON STEWART: Could something like this happen? JON STEWART: Could something like this happen?
2334 01:39:15,317 01:39:19,487 Legally, this could absolutely happen. Legally, this could absolutely happen.
2335 01:39:19,521 01:39:24,292 Somebody could create a political organization-- Somebody could create a political organization--
2336 01:39:24,326 01:39:28,296 so-called outside group, a super PAC, 527-- so-called outside group, a super PAC, 527--
2337 01:39:28,330 01:39:31,166 raise an unlimited amount of money, raise an unlimited amount of money,
2338 01:39:31,199 01:39:34,469 and then choose to give that money and then choose to give that money
2339 01:39:34,502 01:39:37,339 to another organization, a charity, to another organization, a charity,
2340 01:39:37,372 01:39:40,342 and use it for public purposes. and use it for public purposes.
2341 01:39:40,375 01:39:43,678 And you don't need the donors' consent to do that. And you don't need the donors' consent to do that.
2342 01:39:43,711 01:39:45,813 The problem we have is that The problem we have is that
2343 01:39:45,847 01:39:49,351 none of the pieces of the system are working today. none of the pieces of the system are working today.
2344 01:39:49,384 01:39:52,854 You have regulators like the Federal Election Commission You have regulators like the Federal Election Commission
2345 01:39:52,887 01:39:54,722 that don't have a quorum, can't meet, that don't have a quorum, can't meet,
2346 01:39:54,756 01:39:57,659 and when they do, they disagree on what the law is. and when they do, they disagree on what the law is.
2347 01:39:57,692 01:40:01,296 You have Congress deadlocked so it can't rewrite the laws. You have Congress deadlocked so it can't rewrite the laws.
2348 01:40:01,329 01:40:03,331 You have the Supreme Court You have the Supreme Court
2349 01:40:03,365 01:40:07,001 that thinks that almost nothing is corrupt that thinks that almost nothing is corrupt
2350 01:40:07,035 01:40:11,473 and that citizens won't think the sale of access-- and that citizens won't think the sale of access--
2351 01:40:11,506 01:40:13,875 what the court calls ingratiation what the court calls ingratiation
2352 01:40:13,908 01:40:18,513 in return for giving money to candidates-- is a problem. in return for giving money to candidates-- is a problem.
2353 01:40:18,546 01:40:21,183 STEWART: So, to sum up, we currently have STEWART: So, to sum up, we currently have
2354 01:40:21,216 01:40:22,884 hundreds of millions to billions of dollars hundreds of millions to billions of dollars
2355 01:40:22,917 01:40:25,253 that is, uh, uh, untraceable, that is, uh, uh, untraceable,
2356 01:40:25,287 01:40:27,922 uh, that can pour into groups uh, that can pour into groups
2357 01:40:27,955 01:40:30,992 that are actually coordinating with-with candidates that are actually coordinating with-with candidates
2358 01:40:31,025 01:40:33,895 who end up having to spend a good amount of their time who end up having to spend a good amount of their time
2359 01:40:33,928 01:40:35,863 raising more and more money to keep up raising more and more money to keep up
2360 01:40:35,897 01:40:38,733 with the arms race that is occurring. with the arms race that is occurring.
2361 01:40:38,766 01:40:42,870 Uh, the money continues to pour in and corrupt Uh, the money continues to pour in and corrupt
2362 01:40:42,904 01:40:45,407 not just where they spend their time not just where they spend their time
2363 01:40:45,440 01:40:48,676 and how they spend their time but on the types of legislation and how they spend their time but on the types of legislation
2364 01:40:48,710 01:40:51,546 that they would even bring to the fore. that they would even bring to the fore.
2365 01:40:51,579 01:40:54,449 And the one group that would be charged And the one group that would be charged
2366 01:40:54,482 01:40:59,554 with regulating, uh, this spigot, uh, doesn't meet with regulating, uh, this spigot, uh, doesn't meet
2367 01:40:59,587 01:41:01,889 'cause there aren't enough of them. 'cause there aren't enough of them.
2368 01:41:01,923 01:41:03,891 Yes. Yes.
2369 01:41:03,925 01:41:07,061 (both laughing) (both laughing)
2370 01:41:07,095 01:41:09,231 I realize that's not helpful to you, but... I realize that's not helpful to you, but...
2371 01:41:09,264 01:41:11,133 It is very helpful. Thank you. It is very helpful. Thank you.
2372 01:41:11,166 01:41:12,600 * Ooh * Ooh
2373 01:41:12,634 01:41:15,337 * Your mess is mine * Your mess is mine
2374 01:41:18,606 01:41:20,942 * Your mess is mine. * Your mess is mine.
2375 01:41:20,975 01:41:22,577 (music ends) (music ends)
2375 01:41:20,975 01:41:22,577 (music ends) (music ends)