# Start End Original Translated
1 00:00:36,603 00:00:38,242 I got a job. What? Where? I got a job. What? Where?
2 00:00:38,272 00:00:40,002 At the stamford gazette. Yes. At the stamford gazette. Yes.
3 00:00:40,042 00:00:43,010 And I'm going back to Yale. I called and talked to my Dean. And I'm going back to Yale. I called and talked to my Dean.
4 00:00:43,040 00:00:45,909 Tell Lane you're moving out and get your butt here right now. Tell Lane you're moving out and get your butt here right now.
5 00:00:45,939 00:00:47,209 I love you, mom. I love you, mom.
6 00:00:51,977 00:00:52,746 Hey. Hey.
7 00:00:52,776 00:00:54,545 Rory: What? Rory: What?
8 00:00:54,585 00:00:57,284 Make an occasional noise, so I know you didn't pull an Elvis. Make an occasional noise, so I know you didn't pull an Elvis.
9 00:00:57,314 00:00:59,253 I'm just putting the finishing touches on the face. I'm just putting the finishing touches on the face.
10 00:00:59,283 00:01:00,723 Pbht! You're an infant. Pbht! You're an infant.
11 00:01:00,753 00:01:03,022 Hit yourself with a giant powder puff and get out here. Hit yourself with a giant powder puff and get out here.
12 00:01:03,052 00:01:04,591 I love this bathroom. I love this bathroom.
13 00:01:04,621 00:01:06,750 Uh, too much. I need the sink. Uh, too much. I need the sink.
14 00:01:06,790 00:01:09,759 You need my sink? What about the other sink? You need my sink? What about the other sink?
15 00:01:08,959 00:01:10,919 Previously on "Gilmore girls"... Previously on "Gilmore girls"...
16 00:01:09,789 00:01:11,928 Oh, I forgot I had two sinks. Oh, I forgot I had two sinks.
17 00:01:10,959 00:01:12,388 Christopher: Hey, lor, I think I have good news. Christopher: Hey, lor, I think I have good news.
18 00:01:11,958 00:01:14,397 Well, you do. Well, you do.
19 00:01:12,428 00:01:14,137 It was just a weird coincidence that I walk in, It was just a weird coincidence that I walk in,
20 00:01:14,167 00:01:15,806 and Christopher happens to be leaving a message. and Christopher happens to be leaving a message.
21 00:01:14,427 00:01:16,726 Look at this. Two sinks... I'm so decadent. Look at this. Two sinks... I'm so decadent.
22 00:01:15,826 00:01:17,396 I'm not gonna like it when Christopher calls, I'm not gonna like it when Christopher calls,
23 00:01:16,756 00:01:19,295 I could brush my teeth over this one, spit into that one. I could brush my teeth over this one, spit into that one.
24 00:01:17,436 00:01:19,135 but we have to tell each other everything. but we have to tell each other everything.
25 00:01:19,165 00:01:20,794 Agreed. Agreed.
26 00:01:19,325 00:01:21,934 This is now my official favorite room in the whole world, This is now my official favorite room in the whole world,
27 00:01:20,834 00:01:21,804 I'm gonna take hair samples from three men, I'm gonna take hair samples from three men,
28 00:01:21,834 00:01:23,073 run DNA tests on them, run DNA tests on them,
29 00:01:21,964 00:01:24,433 besides the reading room at the British museum. besides the reading room at the British museum.
30 00:01:23,103 00:01:24,473 and figure out which one's my father. and figure out which one's my father.
31 00:01:24,463 00:01:26,602 But add a dome ceiling and 10 million books, But add a dome ceiling and 10 million books,
32 00:01:24,503 00:01:26,772 I'm sorry. Did you say "your father"? I'm sorry. Did you say "your father"?
33 00:01:26,632 00:01:28,471 and you got yourself a horse race. and you got yourself a horse race.
34 00:01:26,802 00:01:28,161 It's you. And you're sure. It's you. And you're sure.
35 00:01:28,201 00:01:29,970 Absolutely. Want to see my report? Absolutely. Want to see my report?
36 00:01:28,501 00:01:30,270 Paul anka loves this room, too. Paul anka loves this room, too.
37 00:01:30,010 00:01:32,509 Logan, I love you. Wow. Logan, I love you. Wow.
38 00:01:30,300 00:01:31,870 You ever hear that tape of him You ever hear that tape of him
39 00:01:31,900 00:01:33,439 chewing out his band after a show? chewing out his band after a show?
40 00:01:32,539 00:01:33,779 You're getting to me. You're getting to me.
41 00:01:33,469 00:01:35,438 "When I move, I slice like a hammer! "When I move, I slice like a hammer!
42 00:01:33,809 00:01:35,348 Me? Yes, you're an ass. Me? Yes, you're an ass.
43 00:01:35,378 00:01:37,817 I didn't tell you to quit Yale! You did that! I didn't tell you to quit Yale! You did that!
44 00:01:35,468 00:01:36,708 The guys get shirts!" The guys get shirts!"
45 00:01:36,738 00:01:38,377 That's the human Paul anka. That's the human Paul anka.
46 00:01:37,847 00:01:40,146 Why don't you go off with Jack, whatever his name is? Why don't you go off with Jack, whatever his name is?
47 00:01:38,407 00:01:40,036 I don't believe the canine version exists. I don't believe the canine version exists.
48 00:01:40,076 00:01:41,945 He is laying low until he figures out He is laying low until he figures out
49 00:01:40,176 00:01:42,075 Oh, I'm not going off with Jess. Oh, I'm not going off with Jess.
50 00:01:41,975 00:01:44,444 you're not gonna eat his pigs' ears or something. you're not gonna eat his pigs' ears or something.
51 00:01:44,474 00:01:46,813 The chicken's got to show his face so I can prove myself. The chicken's got to show his face so I can prove myself.
52 00:01:46,843 00:01:48,283 What all do you have going on today? What all do you have going on today?
53 00:01:48,313 00:01:51,281 Oh, she's already got a list going. Oh, she's already got a list going.
54 00:01:51,311 00:01:54,350 Follow-up calls to make sure I'm all set for spring semester. Follow-up calls to make sure I'm all set for spring semester.
55 00:01:54,380 00:01:55,650 Four hours of community service... Four hours of community service...
56 00:01:55,680 00:01:57,019 I'm gonna try to stretch it to five I'm gonna try to stretch it to five
57 00:01:57,049 00:01:59,288 because I am tantalizingly close to being done. because I am tantalizingly close to being done.
58 00:01:59,318 00:02:01,587 My engine light was on, but I already took care of that. My engine light was on, but I already took care of that.
59 00:02:01,617 00:02:03,886 This morning? Got to gypsy's shop before it opened. This morning? Got to gypsy's shop before it opened.
60 00:02:03,926 00:02:05,985 There was only one other early bird ahead of me, There was only one other early bird ahead of me,
61 00:02:06,025 00:02:09,494 but I bribed gypsy with a pack of rolos, and she took me first. but I bribed gypsy with a pack of rolos, and she took me first.
62 00:02:09,524 00:02:11,393 She is such a rolo whore. She is such a rolo whore.
63 00:02:11,423 00:02:13,662 I've got tons of e-mails to return, and I've got to get I've got tons of e-mails to return, and I've got to get
64 00:02:13,692 00:02:15,661 the eagle gazette a bunch of stuff I've written. the eagle gazette a bunch of stuff I've written.
65 00:02:15,691 00:02:17,500 Don't forget to sleep, daughter of mine. Don't forget to sleep, daughter of mine.
66 00:02:17,530 00:02:19,959 And I've got to unpack and organize everything, And I've got to unpack and organize everything,
67 00:02:19,999 00:02:21,699 and that's it for now. and that's it for now.
68 00:02:21,729 00:02:24,437 Okay, but you will have to leave the bathroom to do all that. Okay, but you will have to leave the bathroom to do all that.
69 00:02:24,467 00:02:27,506 Mmm, reluctantly. See you downstairs. Okay. Mmm, reluctantly. See you downstairs. Okay.
70 00:02:27,536 00:02:29,905 Hey, you have time to eat and hang out with me, don't you? Hey, you have time to eat and hang out with me, don't you?
71 00:02:29,935 00:02:31,934 Is that on your microscopic little list there? Is that on your microscopic little list there?
72 00:02:31,974 00:02:34,873 I carved out the rest of the morning for you. I carved out the rest of the morning for you.
73 00:02:34,903 00:02:36,372 Oh! Oh, my god. What? Oh! Oh, my god. What?
74 00:02:36,402 00:02:37,612 Get down here! I'm coming. Get down here! I'm coming.
75 00:02:39,371 00:02:41,540 He has emerged. He has emerged.
76 00:02:41,580 00:02:43,509 I'm assuming that's Paul anka. Well, it ain't Louis prima. I'm assuming that's Paul anka. Well, it ain't Louis prima.
77 00:02:43,549 00:02:46,578 Shoo. Shoo. He shouldn't be on the table. Shoo. Shoo. He shouldn't be on the table.
78 00:02:46,608 00:02:48,317 That's his favorite spot. What are you gonna do next? That's his favorite spot. What are you gonna do next?
79 00:02:48,347 00:02:50,047 Tell him he can't drink out of my water glass? Tell him he can't drink out of my water glass?
80 00:02:50,077 00:02:51,416 Sorry. How should I approach him? Sorry. How should I approach him?
81 00:02:51,446 00:02:52,516 Follow me. Follow me.
82 00:02:52,546 00:02:54,815 Okay. Okay.
83 00:02:54,855 00:02:56,554 Okay, stop. Okay, stop.
84 00:02:56,584 00:02:58,723 Now go in the kitchen and put sugar on your toes, Now go in the kitchen and put sugar on your toes,
85 00:02:58,753 00:03:00,992 and quickly, because first impressions are crucial and quickly, because first impressions are crucial
86 00:03:01,022 00:03:02,651 and you're blowing it big time. and you're blowing it big time.
87 00:03:02,691 00:03:05,360 He loves sugar, so the first time you come close to him, He loves sugar, so the first time you come close to him,
88 00:03:05,390 00:03:06,790 if you've got sugar on your toes if you've got sugar on your toes
89 00:03:06,820 00:03:07,959 that he can lick and enjoy, you're in. that he can lick and enjoy, you're in.
90 00:03:07,989 00:03:09,728 He's gonna lick it? Go, quick! He's gonna lick it? Go, quick!
91 00:03:15,866 00:03:17,735 Wet your toes first so it sticks. Wet your toes first so it sticks.
92 00:03:17,765 00:03:19,064 What? What?
93 00:03:19,094 00:03:21,463 Dry sugar on a dry toe isn't gonna work. Dry sugar on a dry toe isn't gonna work.
94 00:03:21,503 00:03:23,303 Oh, jeez. Oh, jeez.
95 00:03:26,701 00:03:27,941 I'm making a mess. I'm making a mess.
96 00:03:27,971 00:03:29,470 Don't worry about the mess. Don't worry about the mess.
97 00:03:29,500 00:03:30,739 We're gonna have ants. We're gonna have ants.
98 00:03:30,769 00:03:32,339 Hurry! I'm coming. Hurry! I'm coming.
99 00:03:34,508 00:03:36,477 Okay, my toes are all sugared. Okay, my toes are all sugared.
100 00:03:36,507 00:03:37,846 Okay, good. Okay, good.
101 00:03:37,876 00:03:39,846 Now do the hokey-pokey and turn yourself around. Now do the hokey-pokey and turn yourself around.
102 00:03:39,876 00:03:42,415 What? All you have to do is pet him, and you're in! What? All you have to do is pet him, and you're in!
103 00:03:42,444 00:03:44,084 You're evil. Yes, I am. You're evil. Yes, I am.
104 00:03:44,114 00:03:47,782 Hey, there, boy. Oh, that tickles. Hey, there, boy. Oh, that tickles.
105 00:03:47,812 00:03:49,881 Well, he's glad you're here. Well, he's glad you're here.
106 00:03:49,911 00:03:50,881 Wait a minute, you're here! Wait a minute, you're here!
107 00:03:50,921 00:03:52,880 I know. Wait right there. I know. Wait right there.
108 00:03:52,920 00:03:54,519 Is this another trick? Is this another trick?
109 00:03:54,549 00:03:57,088 No, I'm just getting something. No, I'm just getting something.
110 00:03:57,118 00:03:58,718 [ Electronic bleeps ] Bop it! [ Electronic bleeps ] Bop it!
111 00:03:58,758 00:04:00,017 You're pulling out the bop it? You're pulling out the bop it?
112 00:04:00,057 00:04:02,056 You're already that bored with me? You're already that bored with me?
113 00:04:02,086 00:04:04,725 I accidentally hit the bop it while I was getting this. You bought me a hat. I accidentally hit the bop it while I was getting this. You bought me a hat.
114 00:04:04,755 00:04:06,754 No, it's a hatbox filled with these. No, it's a hatbox filled with these.
115 00:04:06,794 00:04:08,064 These are notes written These are notes written
116 00:04:08,094 00:04:10,063 on whatever I had on hand at the time. on whatever I had on hand at the time.
117 00:04:10,093 00:04:12,762 Anytime I had a topic I wanted to share with you Anytime I had a topic I wanted to share with you
118 00:04:12,792 00:04:15,760 or a random thought during that crappy time apart of ours, or a random thought during that crappy time apart of ours,
119 00:04:15,800 00:04:18,029 I jotted it down and threw it in the hatbox I jotted it down and threw it in the hatbox
120 00:04:18,069 00:04:19,129 so I wouldn't forget. so I wouldn't forget.
121 00:04:19,169 00:04:20,538 Really? Really?
122 00:04:20,568 00:04:22,667 I missed you, kid. I missed you, too. I missed you, kid. I missed you, too.
123 00:04:22,697 00:04:24,067 So hit me with them. So hit me with them.
124 00:04:24,107 00:04:25,866 While we walk to Luke's. Come on. While we walk to Luke's. Come on.
125 00:04:25,906 00:04:27,675 Some of these are pretty cryptic. Some of these are pretty cryptic.
126 00:04:27,705 00:04:29,804 Um, Lenny kravitz. Where did Lenny kravitz... Um, Lenny kravitz. Where did Lenny kravitz...
127 00:04:29,834 00:04:31,574 Get all his money? Get all his money?
128 00:04:31,604 00:04:33,973 Yes! One hit, and he's buying a fifth Avenue mansion. Yes! One hit, and he's buying a fifth Avenue mansion.
129 00:04:34,013 00:04:36,512 Maybe he went through Nicole Kidman's wallet. Maybe he went through Nicole Kidman's wallet.
130 00:04:36,542 00:04:37,681 That's got to be it. That's got to be it.
131 00:04:37,711 00:04:39,680 Computer m.P. Down... Computer m.P. Down...
132 00:04:39,710 00:04:41,580 Oh, I want to download music. There's so much out there. Oh, I want to download music. There's so much out there.
133 00:04:41,609 00:04:43,079 Can you help me figure that out... mp3 players? Can you help me figure that out... mp3 players?
134 00:04:43,109 00:04:45,078 I can do that. Next? I can do that. Next?
135 00:04:45,118 00:04:47,787 Uh, kirk's skeet shooting. That's a bad combination. Uh, kirk's skeet shooting. That's a bad combination.
136 00:04:47,817 00:04:49,486 Yes, first time the town church Yes, first time the town church
137 00:04:49,516 00:04:51,555 has taken gunfire since the 18th century. has taken gunfire since the 18th century.
138 00:04:51,585 00:04:53,454 You miss so much so quickly. You miss so much so quickly.
139 00:04:53,484 00:04:56,983 ♪ If you're out on the road ♪ ♪ If you're out on the road ♪
140 00:04:57,023 00:05:02,091 ♪ feelin' lonely and so cold ♪ ♪ feelin' lonely and so cold ♪
141 00:05:02,121 00:05:06,029 ♪ all you have to do is call my name ♪ ♪ all you have to do is call my name ♪
142 00:05:06,059 00:05:10,597 ♪ and I'll be there on the next train ♪ ♪ and I'll be there on the next train ♪
143 00:05:10,627 00:05:15,095 ♪ where you lead, I will follow ♪ ♪ where you lead, I will follow ♪
144 00:05:15,135 00:05:19,663 ♪ anywhere that you tell me to ♪ anywhere that you tell me to
145 00:05:19,703 00:05:22,672 ♪ if you need ♪ if you need ♪ if you need ♪ if you need
146 00:05:22,702 00:05:24,471 ♪ you need me to be with you ♪ you need me to be with you
147 00:05:24,501 00:05:28,570 ♪ I will follow ♪ oh, oh, oh ♪ I will follow ♪ oh, oh, oh
148 00:05:28,610 00:05:33,608 ♪ where you lead, I will follow ♪ ♪ where you lead, I will follow ♪
149 00:05:33,648 00:05:37,846 ♪ any, anywhere that you tell me to ♪ ♪ any, anywhere that you tell me to ♪
150 00:05:37,876 00:05:40,715 ♪ if you need ♪ if you need ♪ if you need ♪ if you need
151 00:05:40,745 00:05:42,444 ♪ you need me to be with you ♪ you need me to be with you
152 00:05:42,484 00:05:44,453 ♪ I will follow where you lead ♪ I will follow where you lead
153 00:05:47,682 00:05:49,981 okay... babette, cats. okay... babette, cats.
154 00:05:50,021 00:05:51,150 Death? No. Death? No.
155 00:05:51,190 00:05:52,719 Adopted another one? No. Adopted another one? No.
156 00:05:52,749 00:05:53,989 What? What?
157 00:05:54,019 00:05:55,558 Recorded their meows, did some editing, Recorded their meows, did some editing,
158 00:05:55,588 00:05:57,587 and cut a record of them singing "ring of fire." and cut a record of them singing "ring of fire."
159 00:05:57,627 00:05:59,527 That goes straight to the top of my charts. That goes straight to the top of my charts.
160 00:05:59,557 00:06:00,796 I started reading "beowulf," I started reading "beowulf,"
161 00:06:00,826 00:06:02,095 that new translation you recommended. that new translation you recommended.
162 00:06:02,125 00:06:03,695 The Seamus heaney? Good for you. The Seamus heaney? Good for you.
163 00:06:03,725 00:06:05,094 And "stopped reading 'beowulf'" And "stopped reading 'beowulf'"
164 00:06:05,124 00:06:07,123 jotted on the same slip three minutes later. jotted on the same slip three minutes later.
165 00:06:07,163 00:06:08,793 You gave it the old college try. You gave it the old college try.
166 00:06:08,833 00:06:10,902 Ooh, this is a new one. Kirk's got a new hobby. Ooh, this is a new one. Kirk's got a new hobby.
167 00:06:10,932 00:06:13,471 He's doing tai chi? How'd you know that? He's doing tai chi? How'd you know that?
168 00:06:13,501 00:06:15,000 Because he's doing it right there. Because he's doing it right there.
169 00:06:15,030 00:06:17,569 Is it possible for him to do something without looking silly? Is it possible for him to do something without looking silly?
170 00:06:17,599 00:06:18,668 He wouldn't be kirk then. He wouldn't be kirk then.
171 00:06:18,698 00:06:20,738 Bendelschnitz? Bendelschnitz?
172 00:06:20,768 00:06:22,507 That's not English. That's not English.
173 00:06:22,537 00:06:24,606 I know. I'll add it to the ones I can't make out. I know. I'll add it to the ones I can't make out.
174 00:06:24,636 00:06:27,875 And razzlefrat. And razzlefrat.
175 00:06:27,905 00:06:28,874 Another unreadable one. Another unreadable one.
176 00:06:28,904 00:06:30,204 They're stacking up. They're stacking up.
177 00:06:30,244 00:06:32,972 Okay. Now wait out here. Okay. Now wait out here.
178 00:06:33,012 00:06:34,642 Why? Why?
179 00:06:34,682 00:06:36,881 It's a thing, a moment thing. Just wait here. It's a thing, a moment thing. Just wait here.
180 00:06:38,910 00:06:39,880 Hey. Hey.
181 00:06:39,910 00:06:41,519 You ready? For what? You ready? For what?
182 00:06:41,549 00:06:43,848 For this... the moment you've all been waiting for. For this... the moment you've all been waiting for.
183 00:06:43,888 00:06:45,547 [ Rolls tongue ] [ Rolls tongue ]
184 00:06:45,587 00:06:46,917 What's that? It's a drum roll. What's that? It's a drum roll.
185 00:06:46,947 00:06:48,556 Sounded more like a helicopter. Sounded more like a helicopter.
186 00:06:48,586 00:06:50,585 No, it's a drum roll. Go with it, okay? No, it's a drum roll. Go with it, okay?
187 00:06:50,625 00:06:52,084 Ladies and gentleman, Rory Gilmore! Ladies and gentleman, Rory Gilmore!
188 00:06:52,124 00:06:53,594 Hi, Luke. Hi, Luke.
189 00:06:53,624 00:06:56,193 Hey! Rory, you're back! You look good. Hey! Rory, you're back! You look good.
190 00:06:56,223 00:06:59,821 Healthy, happy, here with your mom, both of you here. Healthy, happy, here with your mom, both of you here.
191 00:06:59,861 00:07:03,799 It's great, you know? Yay. It's great, you know? Yay.
192 00:07:03,829 00:07:05,459 I don't think I've ever said "yay" before. I don't think I've ever said "yay" before.
193 00:07:05,499 00:07:07,468 It sounded weird. A little. It sounded weird. A little.
194 00:07:07,498 00:07:08,997 What was that sound you were making? What was that sound you were making?
195 00:07:09,027 00:07:10,736 It sounded like a helicopter or something. It sounded like a helicopter or something.
196 00:07:10,766 00:07:11,996 That's what I said. That's what I said.
197 00:07:12,036 00:07:13,765 Has no one heard a drum roll before? Has no one heard a drum roll before?
198 00:07:13,805 00:07:16,464 Hey, I saved you the best table in case you showed. Hey, I saved you the best table in case you showed.
199 00:07:16,504 00:07:18,173 In case? It was mandatory. In case? It was mandatory.
200 00:07:18,203 00:07:20,472 What can I get you? Never mind. What can I get you? Never mind.
201 00:07:20,502 00:07:22,941 I'm gonna bring you everything you like. I'm gonna bring you everything you like.
202 00:07:22,971 00:07:25,810 You were with me when I wrote this. What does it say? You were with me when I wrote this. What does it say?
203 00:07:25,840 00:07:29,209 Oh, this is from that stupid Mexican restaurant we went to. Oh, this is from that stupid Mexican restaurant we went to.
204 00:07:29,239 00:07:30,908 I wrote something on the other side. I wrote something on the other side.
205 00:07:30,948 00:07:32,107 Man, this place stunk! Man, this place stunk!
206 00:07:32,147 00:07:33,977 I know, but read the back there. I know, but read the back there.
207 00:07:34,017 00:07:37,015 Look what we paid. Unbelievable. Downright usurious. Look what we paid. Unbelievable. Downright usurious.
208 00:07:37,045 00:07:38,985 Look at the other side there... the "razzlefrat." Look at the other side there... the "razzlefrat."
209 00:07:39,015 00:07:40,954 They did charge me for that second beer. They did charge me for that second beer.
210 00:07:40,984 00:07:42,683 Scandalous, but the other side. Scandalous, but the other side.
211 00:07:42,713 00:07:44,152 6 bucks for guacamole. 6 bucks for guacamole.
212 00:07:44,182 00:07:46,921 Oh, just bring me what she's having. Oh, just bring me what she's having.
213 00:07:46,951 00:07:49,520 So, Luke, wait. You haven't told me anything about yourself. So, Luke, wait. You haven't told me anything about yourself.
214 00:07:49,550 00:07:50,520 What's new with you? What's new with you?
215 00:07:50,560 00:07:53,089 With me? Uh, nothing. With me? Uh, nothing.
216 00:07:53,119 00:07:54,488 We're engaged, your mom and me. We're engaged, your mom and me.
217 00:07:54,528 00:07:55,957 I know that, but anything else? I know that, but anything else?
218 00:07:55,987 00:07:58,796 No. No, why? Just wondering. No. No, why? Just wondering.
219 00:07:58,826 00:08:00,665 What have you heard? Nothing. That's why I'm asking. What have you heard? Nothing. That's why I'm asking.
220 00:08:00,695 00:08:03,024 Well, there's your answer... Nothing's new. Well, there's your answer... Nothing's new.
221 00:08:03,064 00:08:05,733 I'm gonna go put in your order, okay? I'm gonna go put in your order, okay?
222 00:08:05,763 00:08:07,263 We'll be waiting hungrily. We'll be waiting hungrily.
223 00:08:07,293 00:08:10,631 Did I inadvertently step into something there? No idea. Did I inadvertently step into something there? No idea.
224 00:08:10,671 00:08:12,670 Mother and daughter together again, Mother and daughter together again,
225 00:08:12,700 00:08:13,870 and all is right with the world. and all is right with the world.
226 00:08:13,900 00:08:15,099 Hi, Lorelai. Hi, Lane. Hi, Lorelai. Hi, Lane.
227 00:08:15,139 00:08:16,769 Next Wednesday night, I need you. Next Wednesday night, I need you.
228 00:08:16,799 00:08:17,968 Tell me you're not busy. Tell me you're not busy.
229 00:08:18,008 00:08:19,567 I'm not sure. Why? I'm not sure. Why?
230 00:08:19,607 00:08:21,137 We're doing a showcase, me and the band. We're doing a showcase, me and the band.
231 00:08:21,177 00:08:24,775 Not a gig, a showcase, and a label's going to be there. Not a gig, a showcase, and a label's going to be there.
232 00:08:24,805 00:08:26,205 I'm shaking! I shouldn't shake. I'm shaking! I shouldn't shake.
233 00:08:26,245 00:08:28,144 I'm a drummer. It'll mess up the beat. I'm a drummer. It'll mess up the beat.
234 00:08:28,174 00:08:29,843 But, my god, we're playing for a label. But, my god, we're playing for a label.
235 00:08:29,873 00:08:32,282 Wow, Lane, I'm absolutely there. This is big. Wow, Lane, I'm absolutely there. This is big.
236 00:08:32,312 00:08:34,581 Unless it's a "waiting for guffman" thing, Unless it's a "waiting for guffman" thing,
237 00:08:34,611 00:08:36,680 and the label guys don't show up. and the label guys don't show up.
238 00:08:36,710 00:08:38,519 Did I just jinx it? Did I just jinx it?
239 00:08:38,549 00:08:40,648 Let's do that UN-jinxing thing we used to do just in case. Let's do that UN-jinxing thing we used to do just in case.
240 00:08:40,688 00:08:41,818 Good. Good.
241 00:08:41,848 00:08:43,187 Both: Jinx back, double pinky, Both: Jinx back, double pinky,
242 00:08:43,217 00:08:45,686 around the side, double pinky, jinx back. around the side, double pinky, jinx back.
243 00:08:45,716 00:08:47,086 Hey, I want to do that. Hey, I want to do that.
244 00:08:47,116 00:08:48,625 It's a serious thing. You don't just do it. It's a serious thing. You don't just do it.
245 00:08:48,655 00:08:49,985 Sorry. Sorry.
246 00:08:50,025 00:08:52,054 Well, Lane, you guys are so prepared for this. Well, Lane, you guys are so prepared for this.
247 00:08:52,094 00:08:55,262 That tape you gave me of your new stuff was awesome. That tape you gave me of your new stuff was awesome.
248 00:08:55,292 00:08:56,722 Hey, what if I jinx it? Hey, what if I jinx it?
249 00:08:56,762 00:08:58,161 Do I get to do the UN-jinxing thing then? Do I get to do the UN-jinxing thing then?
250 00:08:58,191 00:09:00,190 If we jinx back a second time within the hour, If we jinx back a second time within the hour,
251 00:09:00,230 00:09:02,129 it cancels out the first jinx back. it cancels out the first jinx back.
252 00:09:02,159 00:09:03,929 What were your favorites on the tape? What were your favorites on the tape?
253 00:09:03,969 00:09:07,597 "Melissa" was catchy and "calling Francine," "Melissa" was catchy and "calling Francine,"
254 00:09:07,637 00:09:10,666 but that other one... "Rebecca in the morning"? but that other one... "Rebecca in the morning"?
255 00:09:10,706 00:09:12,705 That was my favorite. Mine, too! That was my favorite. Mine, too!
256 00:09:12,735 00:09:14,734 Zach's into songs with girls' names, huh? Zach's into songs with girls' names, huh?
257 00:09:14,774 00:09:16,703 He thinks that's our best shot at radio play. He thinks that's our best shot at radio play.
258 00:09:16,733 00:09:18,902 It worked for the police, the knack, Franz ferdinand. It worked for the police, the knack, Franz ferdinand.
259 00:09:18,942 00:09:21,311 Good thinking. Do you want to be our d.A. Pennebaker? Good thinking. Do you want to be our d.A. Pennebaker?
260 00:09:21,341 00:09:22,911 We're borrowing a video camera, We're borrowing a video camera,
261 00:09:22,941 00:09:24,710 and we need someone sober to do the photography. and we need someone sober to do the photography.
262 00:09:24,740 00:09:26,679 I can set my crack pipe aside and do that. I can set my crack pipe aside and do that.
263 00:09:26,709 00:09:28,248 Thanks! You plus one, right? Thanks! You plus one, right?
264 00:09:28,278 00:09:30,148 Plus one? You plus Logan? Plus one? You plus Logan?
265 00:09:30,178 00:09:31,817 No, just me. No, just me.
266 00:09:31,847 00:09:33,746 Oh, okay. How about you, Lorelai? Oh, okay. How about you, Lorelai?
267 00:09:33,786 00:09:35,785 Working that night, sweetie, but break a leg. Working that night, sweetie, but break a leg.
268 00:09:35,815 00:09:37,754 Does that get me a hand thingy? No. Does that get me a hand thingy? No.
269 00:09:37,784 00:09:39,783 Rats. See you guys. Rats. See you guys.
270 00:09:39,813 00:09:42,622 So just you, huh? Okay. So just you, huh? Okay.
271 00:09:42,652 00:09:44,252 As long as you're prying... I wasn't. As long as you're prying... I wasn't.
272 00:09:44,292 00:09:45,691 Briefly, succinctly... Briefly, succinctly...
273 00:09:45,721 00:09:47,620 Logan and I are not talking right now. Logan and I are not talking right now.
274 00:09:47,660 00:09:49,020 Ah. Ah.
275 00:09:49,060 00:09:51,788 We had a fight, a big one, in public. Oops. We had a fight, a big one, in public. Oops.
276 00:09:51,828 00:09:55,097 I think we needed a little break. It's more like a hiatus. I think we needed a little break. It's more like a hiatus.
277 00:09:55,127 00:09:57,796 Well, sometimes a break is good. Sometimes. Well, sometimes a break is good. Sometimes.
278 00:09:57,826 00:10:00,895 All right, food, first wave only. All right, food, first wave only.
279 00:10:00,935 00:10:02,334 Second wave, five minutes. Second wave, five minutes.
280 00:10:02,364 00:10:04,733 Let's dig in. Let's dig in.
281 00:10:04,763 00:10:06,262 I hope it's not cold. I hope it's not cold.
282 00:10:06,302 00:10:09,871 Oops. I think I jinxed it. Oops. I think I jinxed it.
283 00:10:09,901 00:10:11,570 Both: Jinx back, double pinky, Both: Jinx back, double pinky,
284 00:10:11,600 00:10:13,199 around the side, double pinky, jinx back. around the side, double pinky, jinx back.
285 00:10:16,138 00:10:17,837 Where's the onions for my sauce? Where's the onions for my sauce?
286 00:10:17,877 00:10:19,177 Who's my onion man? Right here, Sookie. Who's my onion man? Right here, Sookie.
287 00:10:19,207 00:10:21,306 Okay, right here, Carl. I need them right there. Okay, right here, Carl. I need them right there.
288 00:10:21,346 00:10:25,314 Okay, get the shallots in. It's time. It's time. Okay, get the shallots in. It's time. It's time.
289 00:10:25,344 00:10:27,014 Okay, needs more garlic. Okay, needs more garlic.
290 00:10:27,044 00:10:28,643 Come on, "godfather" it up for me. Come on, "godfather" it up for me.
291 00:10:28,683 00:10:30,712 Good! Good, good, good, good, good, good. Good! Good, good, good, good, good, good.
292 00:10:30,752 00:10:32,651 Okay, if you can travel back in time Okay, if you can travel back in time
293 00:10:32,681 00:10:34,250 and make me not make the veal and ham paté, and make me not make the veal and ham paté,
294 00:10:34,280 00:10:35,920 I'd appreciate it. I'd appreciate it.
295 00:10:35,950 00:10:38,119 Talk me out of these things in the future, guys. Talk me out of these things in the future, guys.
296 00:10:38,149 00:10:39,618 Hello. Hello.
297 00:10:39,648 00:10:41,287 Could you step away from the pan, please? Could you step away from the pan, please?
298 00:10:41,317 00:10:44,226 Honey, do you see a joystick? This is not a game, okay? Honey, do you see a joystick? This is not a game, okay?
299 00:10:44,256 00:10:46,885 It's a haché sauce, and it's for keeps. Put it down. It's a haché sauce, and it's for keeps. Put it down.
300 00:10:46,925 00:10:48,724 Okay, what? Okay, what?
301 00:10:48,754 00:10:50,254 Okay! Okay!
302 00:10:50,294 00:10:52,693 [ Gasps ] Ohh! [ Gasps ] Ohh!
303 00:10:52,723 00:10:54,832 Oh, my god! Oh, my god!
304 00:10:54,862 00:10:55,931 Hi, Sookie. Hi, Sookie.
305 00:10:55,961 00:10:57,731 You're here! [ Laughs ] You're here! [ Laughs ]
306 00:10:57,761 00:10:59,660 You're with us! Oh, I missed you. You're with us! Oh, I missed you.
307 00:10:59,700 00:11:01,129 I missed you. I missed you.
308 00:11:01,169 00:11:03,738 You can set a wedding date... No impediments. You can set a wedding date... No impediments.
309 00:11:03,768 00:11:04,997 Yeah, I already told Luke. Yeah, I already told Luke.
310 00:11:05,037 00:11:07,197 [ Labored breathing ] Hyperventilating. [ Labored breathing ] Hyperventilating.
311 00:11:07,237 00:11:08,906 Hyperventilating. Hyperventilating.
312 00:11:08,936 00:11:10,905 I was just working on my list I was just working on my list
313 00:11:10,935 00:11:13,104 of what to make for Thanksgiving, of what to make for Thanksgiving,
314 00:11:13,134 00:11:16,743 and I was wishing you were gonna be here, and I was wishing you were gonna be here,
315 00:11:16,773 00:11:18,072 and now you are! and now you are!
316 00:11:18,112 00:11:19,941 Oh, my god. Oh, my god.
317 00:11:19,971 00:11:23,979 What if what I'm wishing for is actually coming true? What if what I'm wishing for is actually coming true?
318 00:11:24,009 00:11:26,179 Wish for a sephora to be built within walking distance. Wish for a sephora to be built within walking distance.
319 00:11:26,209 00:11:27,818 Do you need a paper bag? Do you need a paper bag?
320 00:11:27,848 00:11:31,646 I'm good. I'm good. Just happy. I'm good. I'm good. Just happy.
321 00:11:31,686 00:11:32,786 [ Excitedly ] Rory! [ Excitedly ] Rory!
322 00:11:32,816 00:11:34,755 Oh, hi. Wow, Michel. Oh, hi. Wow, Michel.
323 00:11:34,785 00:11:36,784 Hi. Hi.
324 00:11:36,814 00:11:38,123 Boy, that was weird. Boy, that was weird.
325 00:11:38,153 00:11:40,253 She just surprised me. That's all. She just surprised me. That's all.
326 00:11:40,283 00:11:42,722 It's kind of okay that you are here. It's kind of okay that you are here.
327 00:11:42,752 00:11:44,191 It's kind of okay with me, too. It's kind of okay with me, too.
328 00:11:44,221 00:11:45,760 Lunch! What? Lunch! What?
329 00:11:45,790 00:11:47,889 Lunch! I'm making you lunch. Lunch! I'm making you lunch.
330 00:11:47,929 00:11:49,159 But we just... Don't fight it. But we just... Don't fight it.
331 00:11:49,189 00:11:50,998 It just came to me... kabobs. It just came to me... kabobs.
332 00:11:51,028 00:11:52,657 Okay, drop everything, boys. Okay, drop everything, boys.
333 00:11:52,697 00:11:55,326 We're making kabobs for Rory and pot stickers. We're making kabobs for Rory and pot stickers.
334 00:11:55,366 00:11:58,265 Okay, throw everything out. This is a celebration. Okay, throw everything out. This is a celebration.
335 00:11:58,295 00:12:01,034 Let's get to higher ground. Let's get to higher ground.
336 00:12:01,064 00:12:03,063 Okay, we're opening with "Melissa," Okay, we're opening with "Melissa,"
337 00:12:03,103 00:12:04,802 closing with "dear Maureen." closing with "dear Maureen."
338 00:12:04,832 00:12:06,831 The middle part is screwing us up. The middle part is screwing us up.
339 00:12:06,871 00:12:08,840 Oh, man, I wish we had one more ballad. Oh, man, I wish we had one more ballad.
340 00:12:08,870 00:12:11,639 I'm half finished with one, but it's not gonna be ready. I'm half finished with one, but it's not gonna be ready.
341 00:12:11,669 00:12:13,239 ♪ I saw her ♪ I saw her
342 00:12:13,269 00:12:17,707 ♪ in the midst, she came a-walking by, Stella ♪ ♪ in the midst, she came a-walking by, Stella ♪
343 00:12:17,747 00:12:19,376 ♪ now a blur ♪ now a blur
344 00:12:19,406 00:12:21,945 ♪ made a list of what I like about her, Stella ♪ ♪ made a list of what I like about her, Stella ♪
345 00:12:21,975 00:12:23,344 cool. cool.
346 00:12:23,374 00:12:25,244 Yeah, it's got a nice fountains of Wayne Yeah, it's got a nice fountains of Wayne
347 00:12:25,284 00:12:27,753 meets the shins crossed with "odessey" -era zombies meets the shins crossed with "odessey" -era zombies
348 00:12:27,782 00:12:29,012 and a mix of early who and a mix of early who
349 00:12:29,052 00:12:31,081 and mid-to late-era replacements vibe to it. and mid-to late-era replacements vibe to it.
350 00:12:31,121 00:12:32,720 That's what I was going for. That's what I was going for.
351 00:12:32,750 00:12:34,720 Still hunting for that middle eight, you know? Still hunting for that middle eight, you know?
352 00:12:34,750 00:12:36,089 So, um, it's called "Stella"? So, um, it's called "Stella"?
353 00:12:36,119 00:12:38,158 Didn't you like it? Didn't you like it?
354 00:12:38,188 00:12:40,927 No, it's good. It's just... It's another girl's name. No, it's good. It's just... It's another girl's name.
355 00:12:40,957 00:12:42,356 If he was singing about dudes, If he was singing about dudes,
356 00:12:42,386 00:12:44,256 I'd be out the door. I'd be out the door.
357 00:12:44,296 00:12:46,395 I think about people that I've known, I think about people that I've known,
358 00:12:46,425 00:12:47,994 and I draw inspiration from that. and I draw inspiration from that.
359 00:12:48,024 00:12:50,293 I know. It's just no big deal or anything. I know. It's just no big deal or anything.
360 00:12:50,323 00:12:51,962 But have you ever thought to write one about, But have you ever thought to write one about,
361 00:12:51,992 00:12:53,702 I don't know, a girl named Lane. I don't know, a girl named Lane.
362 00:12:53,732 00:12:55,861 Well, "Lane" just isn't that great of a name for a song. Well, "Lane" just isn't that great of a name for a song.
363 00:12:55,901 00:12:57,730 But you've already got one called "Lorraine." But you've already got one called "Lorraine."
364 00:12:57,770 00:12:59,069 "Lorraine" is pretty much "Lane" "Lorraine" is pretty much "Lane"
365 00:12:59,099 00:13:00,399 with an extra syllable thrown in. with an extra syllable thrown in.
366 00:13:00,429 00:13:02,138 True, but nothing rhymes with "Lane." True, but nothing rhymes with "Lane."
367 00:13:02,168 00:13:04,267 I'm sorry, but a million things rhyme with "Lane." I'm sorry, but a million things rhyme with "Lane."
368 00:13:04,307 00:13:07,136 Yeah, "rain," "pain," all cliché stuff. Yeah, "rain," "pain," all cliché stuff.
369 00:13:07,166 00:13:08,705 You're not a writer. You're not a writer.
370 00:13:08,735 00:13:10,744 You could come up with stuff to rhyme with Lane. You could come up with stuff to rhyme with Lane.
371 00:13:10,774 00:13:12,743 Wait, maybe I could right one about your Korean name. Wait, maybe I could right one about your Korean name.
372 00:13:12,773 00:13:14,273 What was that again? [ Speaks Korean ] What was that again? [ Speaks Korean ]
373 00:13:14,313 00:13:17,172 0 for 2. Look, it's not your fault. 0 for 2. Look, it's not your fault.
374 00:13:17,212 00:13:18,741 You didn't pick your name. Your mom did. You didn't pick your name. Your mom did.
375 00:13:18,781 00:13:20,040 Right, I didn't pick it. Right, I didn't pick it.
376 00:13:20,080 00:13:22,110 So where were we? So where were we?
377 00:13:22,150 00:13:24,818 Oh, "Lorraine." Where should "Lorraine" go? Try it after "Rebecca." Oh, "Lorraine." Where should "Lorraine" go? Try it after "Rebecca."
378 00:13:24,848 00:13:27,717 It's not as good as going from "Rebecca" to "Linda Marie." It's not as good as going from "Rebecca" to "Linda Marie."
379 00:13:27,747 00:13:28,917 True is true. True is true.
380 00:13:28,947 00:13:30,646 Man, I wish "Stella" was ready. Man, I wish "Stella" was ready.
381 00:13:34,224 00:13:35,354 Three days. Three days.
382 00:13:35,384 00:13:36,723 Three days he had the hiccups. Three days he had the hiccups.
383 00:13:36,753 00:13:38,293 Poor Paul anka. Poor Paul anka.
384 00:13:38,323 00:13:40,192 And my sneaking up on him to scare them out of him... And my sneaking up on him to scare them out of him...
385 00:13:40,222 00:13:42,161 He jumped so high, his head split my lip. He jumped so high, his head split my lip.
386 00:13:42,191 00:13:44,290 See the red? My blood. See the red? My blood.
387 00:13:44,330 00:13:47,929 Oh, um, here's a non-fun one Oh, um, here's a non-fun one
388 00:13:47,959 00:13:49,028 just to mix it up a little. just to mix it up a little.
389 00:13:49,058 00:13:50,897 What? Your dad called. What? Your dad called.
390 00:13:50,927 00:13:53,396 Wow. It's been like a year, hasn't it? Wow. It's been like a year, hasn't it?
391 00:13:53,426 00:13:55,735 When did he call? When did he call?
392 00:13:55,765 00:13:58,264 The very worst possible time. He's got a knack for that. The very worst possible time. He's got a knack for that.
393 00:13:58,304 00:14:00,133 He left a message, which Luke overheard, He left a message, which Luke overheard,
394 00:14:00,163 00:14:01,273 and it freaked him out. and it freaked him out.
395 00:14:01,303 00:14:03,172 That's understandable. That's understandable.
396 00:14:03,202 00:14:05,771 We argued. Arguing's not just for the younger demographic. We argued. Arguing's not just for the younger demographic.
397 00:14:05,801 00:14:08,270 Nice to know. But then we made up, and we had a good talk. Nice to know. But then we made up, and we had a good talk.
398 00:14:08,310 00:14:10,369 Then I listened to the rest of Christopher's message, Then I listened to the rest of Christopher's message,
399 00:14:10,409 00:14:11,879 and he wants to see me. and he wants to see me.
400 00:14:11,908 00:14:14,048 Why? He didn't say. Why? He didn't say.
401 00:14:14,078 00:14:15,877 He sounded very chipper. He sounded very chipper.
402 00:14:15,907 00:14:18,016 He said he had something very important to discuss with me He said he had something very important to discuss with me
403 00:14:18,046 00:14:19,345 and that it wasn't a trick and that it wasn't a trick
404 00:14:19,375 00:14:22,484 and that it was an absolute, 100% positive thing and that it was an absolute, 100% positive thing
405 00:14:22,514 00:14:23,913 for me and for you. for me and for you.
406 00:14:23,953 00:14:24,853 For both of us? For both of us?
407 00:14:24,883 00:14:26,352 Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
408 00:14:26,382 00:14:28,981 Meaning there's a 99.9% chance that it won't be. Meaning there's a 99.9% chance that it won't be.
409 00:14:29,021 00:14:31,190 I guess so. So what should I do? I guess so. So what should I do?
410 00:14:31,220 00:14:33,289 You could ignore him. That's dangerous, too. You could ignore him. That's dangerous, too.
411 00:14:33,319 00:14:35,818 It's a slippery slope with dad. What could it be about? It's a slippery slope with dad. What could it be about?
412 00:14:35,858 00:14:37,258 I mean, he wouldn't dare be in cahoots I mean, he wouldn't dare be in cahoots
413 00:14:37,288 00:14:39,487 with Emily and Richard on something, would he? with Emily and Richard on something, would he?
414 00:14:39,527 00:14:42,925 He's not that dumb. Yeah, but he's vulnerable. They prey on the weak. He's not that dumb. Yeah, but he's vulnerable. They prey on the weak.
415 00:14:42,955 00:14:45,464 He said it's something positive. It couldn't involve them. He said it's something positive. It couldn't involve them.
416 00:14:45,494 00:14:47,324 Maybe he's getting back together with his wife. Maybe he's getting back together with his wife.
417 00:14:47,364 00:14:50,292 That's not technically good news for us. It's just news. That's not technically good news for us. It's just news.
418 00:14:50,332 00:14:52,961 Maybe it's about g.G. Maybe she's a prodigy. Maybe it's about g.G. Maybe she's a prodigy.
419 00:14:53,001 00:14:54,471 Maybe he's calling to invite us Maybe he's calling to invite us
420 00:14:54,500 00:14:56,170 to her premiere at carnegie hall. to her premiere at carnegie hall.
421 00:14:56,200 00:14:57,939 Playing what instrument? The flugelhorn. Playing what instrument? The flugelhorn.
422 00:14:57,969 00:15:00,838 She's 3. We would have read about it in the paper by now. She's 3. We would have read about it in the paper by now.
423 00:15:00,868 00:15:03,907 "Freakishly talented 3-year-old flugelhorn prodigy discovered." "Freakishly talented 3-year-old flugelhorn prodigy discovered."
424 00:15:03,937 00:15:05,836 It would be very positive news. It would be very positive news.
425 00:15:05,876 00:15:07,305 Hmm. Well, I'm out. Hmm. Well, I'm out.
426 00:15:07,335 00:15:08,774 Me too. Me too.
427 00:15:08,804 00:15:10,074 [ Sighs ] [ Sighs ]
428 00:15:10,104 00:15:12,013 Guess there's only one way to find out. Guess there's only one way to find out.
429 00:15:12,043 00:15:13,373 Guess so. Guess so.
430 00:15:13,412 00:15:16,341 Ugh. Razzlefrat. Bendelschnitz. Ugh. Razzlefrat. Bendelschnitz.
431 00:15:18,380 00:15:19,310 Thank you so much, big brother. Thank you so much, big brother.
432 00:15:19,350 00:15:20,979 What a godsend you are. What a godsend you are.
433 00:15:21,019 00:15:24,388 Yep, god sent me to help you, and now he must pay. Yep, god sent me to help you, and now he must pay.
434 00:15:24,418 00:15:27,517 You know, I've never made dinner for 12 people before. You know, I've never made dinner for 12 people before.
435 00:15:27,547 00:15:30,055 Actually, I've never made dinner before. Actually, I've never made dinner before.
436 00:15:30,085 00:15:32,954 See, I'm making rolls for my Thanksgiving dinner tomorrow, See, I'm making rolls for my Thanksgiving dinner tomorrow,
437 00:15:32,984 00:15:35,993 and I just don't have the oven space... Or the oven. and I just don't have the oven space... Or the oven.
438 00:15:36,023 00:15:37,522 Just hurry, Liz. Just hurry, Liz.
439 00:15:37,552 00:15:40,261 See, I've got a convection oven and a microwave, See, I've got a convection oven and a microwave,
440 00:15:40,291 00:15:42,430 and that's gonna take care of everything else. and that's gonna take care of everything else.
441 00:15:42,460 00:15:43,960 See, I'm a student of Martha. See, I'm a student of Martha.
442 00:15:44,000 00:15:45,929 You know Martha Stewart? She's a genius. You know Martha Stewart? She's a genius.
443 00:15:45,959 00:15:47,498 Don't bother the customers, Liz. Don't bother the customers, Liz.
444 00:15:47,528 00:15:50,997 They're all renaissance-fair people coming to this thing. They're all renaissance-fair people coming to this thing.
445 00:15:51,037 00:15:52,936 You know some of them. Goody. You know some of them. Goody.
446 00:15:52,966 00:15:54,865 Larry, with the "kill 'em all" tattoo on his face, Larry, with the "kill 'em all" tattoo on his face,
447 00:15:54,905 00:15:56,434 and Freddy, the guy who doesn't have thumbs. and Freddy, the guy who doesn't have thumbs.
448 00:15:56,464 00:15:58,433 Don't tell me. He's hitchhiking in. Don't tell me. He's hitchhiking in.
449 00:15:58,473 00:16:01,142 [ Laughs ] You're funny. [ Laughs ] You're funny.
450 00:16:01,172 00:16:03,911 Really, Luke, I'm calling you "yakov" from now on. Really, Luke, I'm calling you "yakov" from now on.
451 00:16:03,941 00:16:07,010 Just try not to be too intrusive, please, Liz. Just try not to be too intrusive, please, Liz.
452 00:16:07,040 00:16:08,309 Yes, sir! Yes, sir!
453 00:16:11,908 00:16:13,307 Hey, that's fun! Hey, that's fun!
454 00:16:13,347 00:16:15,976 Okay, this is not what I call not being intrusive. Okay, this is not what I call not being intrusive.
455 00:16:16,016 00:16:17,116 Wait, I know this. Wait, I know this.
456 00:16:17,146 00:16:18,945 Two "nots" is a double negative, Two "nots" is a double negative,
457 00:16:18,985 00:16:21,314 which makes it a positive and... which makes it a positive and...
458 00:16:21,354 00:16:23,883 You know, this is where I always lose my train of thought. You know, this is where I always lose my train of thought.
459 00:16:23,923 00:16:24,882 You're intruding. You're intruding.
460 00:16:26,422 00:16:29,350 Oh! Pbht! Oh! Pbht!
461 00:16:29,390 00:16:31,290 Is this one roll? It's crazy! Is this one roll? It's crazy!
462 00:16:31,320 00:16:32,389 You separate them. You separate them.
463 00:16:32,419 00:16:34,958 Oh, boy, my carpal tunnel. Oh, boy, my carpal tunnel.
464 00:16:34,988 00:16:37,157 That's gonna make doing this impossible. That's gonna make doing this impossible.
465 00:16:37,187 00:16:39,296 Hey, would you mind giving me a hand? Hey, would you mind giving me a hand?
466 00:16:39,326 00:16:41,025 No, you don't have to do that. No, you don't have to do that.
467 00:16:41,065 00:16:42,325 Yes, I do. Yes, I do.
468 00:16:42,365 00:16:44,164 If you insist. If you insist.
469 00:16:44,194 00:16:47,433 I'm gonna grab me a cup of coffee. I'm gonna grab me a cup of coffee.
470 00:16:47,463 00:16:49,532 Sophie, you've done, like, big-Joe gigs before, Sophie, you've done, like, big-Joe gigs before,
471 00:16:49,562 00:16:51,231 playing the piano. playing the piano.
472 00:16:51,271 00:16:53,400 Any advice? Don't wear a clown suit. Any advice? Don't wear a clown suit.
473 00:16:53,430 00:16:54,800 Thanks. Thanks.
474 00:16:54,840 00:16:56,339 Still got my eye on this beauty. Still got my eye on this beauty.
475 00:16:56,369 00:16:58,068 Just don't put your hand on it. Just don't put your hand on it.
476 00:16:58,108 00:17:00,207 Maybe I'll splurge and get it. You take mastercard? Maybe I'll splurge and get it. You take mastercard?
477 00:17:00,237 00:17:01,577 Why? You got one? Why? You got one?
478 00:17:01,607 00:17:03,436 Just waiting to hear back on the application. Just waiting to hear back on the application.
479 00:17:03,476 00:17:04,805 Keep moving. Keep moving.
480 00:17:04,845 00:17:06,805 Oh! Cool. We should all get these. Oh! Cool. We should all get these.
481 00:17:06,845 00:17:08,044 Wireless Mikes? Wireless Mikes?
482 00:17:08,074 00:17:09,573 Isn't that too Gwen Stefani? Isn't that too Gwen Stefani?
483 00:17:09,613 00:17:11,882 Not if we wear them. It'll be totally Peter Gabriel. Not if we wear them. It'll be totally Peter Gabriel.
484 00:17:11,912 00:17:14,151 [ Soft music plays ] [ Soft music plays ]
485 00:17:17,310 00:17:19,919 Hey, dude, that didn't sound too bad. What is that? Hey, dude, that didn't sound too bad. What is that?
486 00:17:19,949 00:17:22,188 Just a song I've been working on. I don't know if it's good. Just a song I've been working on. I don't know if it's good.
487 00:17:22,218 00:17:23,587 Chords are good. Any lyrics? Chords are good. Any lyrics?
488 00:17:23,617 00:17:25,557 Some. It's called "Lane." Some. It's called "Lane."
489 00:17:25,587 00:17:27,386 It's called "Lane"? Who, me, Lane? It's called "Lane"? Who, me, Lane?
490 00:17:27,416 00:17:29,555 Yeah, we were talking about songs and Lane yesterday, Yeah, we were talking about songs and Lane yesterday,
491 00:17:29,585 00:17:30,894 and I just got inspired. and I just got inspired.
492 00:17:30,924 00:17:32,024 Inspired, huh? Inspired, huh?
493 00:17:32,054 00:17:33,963 That's nice. Thanks, Brian! That's nice. Thanks, Brian!
494 00:17:33,993 00:17:36,162 It doesn't make me want to be violently ill. It doesn't make me want to be violently ill.
495 00:17:36,192 00:17:37,222 High praise. High praise.
496 00:17:37,262 00:17:38,331 Yeah, thanks, Sophie. Yeah, thanks, Sophie.
497 00:17:38,361 00:17:40,160 We can learn it next week. We can learn it next week.
498 00:17:40,190 00:17:43,099 Look, we came to get picks. Let's get picks, okay? Look, we came to get picks. Let's get picks, okay?
499 00:17:55,204 00:17:56,833 I snagged the best table in the house. I snagged the best table in the house.
500 00:17:56,873 00:17:57,973 You slipped the guy a buck? You slipped the guy a buck?
501 00:17:58,003 00:17:59,902 And he gave me 50 cents change. Hey. And he gave me 50 cents change. Hey.
502 00:17:59,942 00:18:01,112 Hey, Chris. Hey, Chris.
503 00:18:01,142 00:18:02,611 [ Both chuckle ] [ Both chuckle ]
504 00:18:02,641 00:18:05,140 I don't know how you do it. You always look amazing. I don't know how you do it. You always look amazing.
505 00:18:05,180 00:18:07,339 I got the girls from the wash and brush up company I got the girls from the wash and brush up company
506 00:18:07,379 00:18:09,208 from "wizard of oz" working for me now. from "wizard of oz" working for me now.
507 00:18:09,248 00:18:12,117 [ Laughs ] Good deal. [ Laughs ] Good deal.
508 00:18:12,147 00:18:15,086 [ Sighs ] So how's our Rory? [ Sighs ] So how's our Rory?
509 00:18:15,116 00:18:17,915 Oh, she's good. She's, um, you know, great. Oh, she's good. She's, um, you know, great.
510 00:18:17,955 00:18:19,484 Very busy. As per usual. Very busy. As per usual.
511 00:18:19,514 00:18:21,423 She took a little time off Yale. She took a little time off Yale.
512 00:18:21,453 00:18:23,552 And the apocalypse is this week, next week? And the apocalypse is this week, next week?
513 00:18:23,582 00:18:25,351 But she's back there, and she's thriving. But she's back there, and she's thriving.
514 00:18:25,391 00:18:26,851 She'll be running the world one day. She'll be running the world one day.
515 00:18:26,891 00:18:28,060 You sure? You sure?
516 00:18:28,090 00:18:29,320 She's doing great. Trust me. She's doing great. Trust me.
517 00:18:29,360 00:18:31,289 I do. I do.
518 00:18:31,329 00:18:33,458 So? So. So? So.
519 00:18:33,488 00:18:35,627 What's going on? Well, wouldn't you like to know? What's going on? Well, wouldn't you like to know?
520 00:18:35,657 00:18:37,256 Christopher. Christopher.
521 00:18:37,296 00:18:39,495 This is the funnest thing I've got to do in years. This is the funnest thing I've got to do in years.
522 00:18:39,525 00:18:41,095 Let me savor it. Let me savor it.
523 00:18:41,135 00:18:43,494 Come on. Tell me. What? Come on. Tell me. What?
524 00:18:43,534 00:18:45,263 My grandfather died. My grandfather died.
525 00:18:45,303 00:18:46,932 Um, that's fun how? Um, that's fun how?
526 00:18:46,962 00:18:48,202 Well, that's not the fun part. Well, that's not the fun part.
527 00:18:48,232 00:18:50,271 The old man was 98... Long life, great life. The old man was 98... Long life, great life.
528 00:18:50,301 00:18:53,639 His last words were an inappropriate pass to the nurse. His last words were an inappropriate pass to the nurse.
529 00:18:53,669 00:18:55,139 Pretty good one, too... I made a mental note of it. Pretty good one, too... I made a mental note of it.
530 00:18:55,169 00:18:56,468 So your grandfather died? So your grandfather died?
531 00:18:56,508 00:18:59,137 Well, the old guy was actually pretty cool, Well, the old guy was actually pretty cool,
532 00:18:59,177 00:19:01,476 and for some reason, he always liked me. and for some reason, he always liked me.
533 00:19:01,506 00:19:03,505 He was the Hayden with the purse strings. He was the Hayden with the purse strings.
534 00:19:03,545 00:19:07,244 Long story short, I'm rich. Long story short, I'm rich.
535 00:19:07,274 00:19:08,643 You're rich! You're rich!
536 00:19:08,683 00:19:11,112 I mean, I'm not Bill Gates by a long shot, I mean, I'm not Bill Gates by a long shot,
537 00:19:11,152 00:19:12,382 but I've got money. but I've got money.
538 00:19:12,411 00:19:14,021 Can you stand it? Can you stand it?
539 00:19:14,051 00:19:15,450 Good, Chris. That's good. Good, Chris. That's good.
540 00:19:15,480 00:19:17,149 And I want to share it. And I want to share it.
541 00:19:17,179 00:19:20,118 I've set g.G. Up with funds for private nursery school I've set g.G. Up with funds for private nursery school
542 00:19:20,148 00:19:22,487 and prep school and college and grad school and prep school and college and grad school
543 00:19:22,517 00:19:24,526 and post-grad school and phd school and post-grad school and phd school
544 00:19:24,556 00:19:27,125 and a wedding and a divorce, if she wants it, and a wedding and a divorce, if she wants it,
545 00:19:27,155 00:19:28,255 and another wedding. and another wedding.
546 00:19:28,295 00:19:30,124 Or she can buy a bunch of cats Or she can buy a bunch of cats
547 00:19:30,154 00:19:32,463 and a lifetime supply of twizzlers and popcorn and a lifetime supply of twizzlers and popcorn
548 00:19:32,493 00:19:35,032 if that's her choice, but she's all set. if that's her choice, but she's all set.
549 00:19:35,062 00:19:38,930 And now I want to take care of you... you and Rory. And now I want to take care of you... you and Rory.
550 00:19:38,960 00:19:41,399 Oh. Oh, Chris, I don't know what to say. Oh. Oh, Chris, I don't know what to say.
551 00:19:41,429 00:19:42,969 What do you want, a car? What do you want, a car?
552 00:19:42,999 00:19:44,998 How about a Bentley? They're pretty sweet. How about a Bentley? They're pretty sweet.
553 00:19:45,038 00:19:48,306 Or a new house or a tract of land to build a new house? Or a new house or a tract of land to build a new house?
554 00:19:48,336 00:19:49,306 I can do that. I can buy you a tract. I can do that. I can buy you a tract.
555 00:19:49,336 00:19:50,365 Christopher. Christopher.
556 00:19:50,405 00:19:52,035 Is there someone you hate Is there someone you hate
557 00:19:52,075 00:19:53,474 that you'd like to say "I can buy and sell you" to? that you'd like to say "I can buy and sell you" to?
558 00:19:53,504 00:19:56,643 Because you can have the funds to make that happen. Because you can have the funds to make that happen.
559 00:19:56,673 00:19:58,012 You want some people-crushing money? You want some people-crushing money?
560 00:19:58,042 00:19:59,572 Oh, Chris, slow down here. Oh, Chris, slow down here.
561 00:19:59,612 00:20:01,041 Everybody needs something. Everybody needs something.
562 00:20:01,081 00:20:03,080 Including you. Don't forget yourself. Including you. Don't forget yourself.
563 00:20:03,110 00:20:05,379 I bought a new bike. I bought a giant audio system. I bought a new bike. I bought a giant audio system.
564 00:20:05,409 00:20:06,948 What else do I want? Nothing. What else do I want? Nothing.
565 00:20:06,978 00:20:08,478 Buy yourself a tract of land. Buy yourself a tract of land.
566 00:20:08,518 00:20:10,477 Come on, let me give you something. Come on, let me give you something.
567 00:20:10,517 00:20:13,516 A castle in Ireland. A civil war Cannon. A castle in Ireland. A civil war Cannon.
568 00:20:13,546 00:20:15,385 A brewery. Yeah! Buy a brewery. A brewery. Yeah! Buy a brewery.
569 00:20:15,415 00:20:17,254 That would be cool. You could brew your own beer. That would be cool. You could brew your own beer.
570 00:20:17,284 00:20:18,624 I had a brewery for a while, I had a brewery for a while,
571 00:20:18,654 00:20:20,383 but I couldn't stand the smell of hops. but I couldn't stand the smell of hops.
572 00:20:20,423 00:20:22,022 Pay off something... Pay off something...
573 00:20:22,052 00:20:25,091 Your house, outstanding bills, your bookie, something. Your house, outstanding bills, your bookie, something.
574 00:20:25,121 00:20:27,160 Pay off Yale. Pay off your back taxes. Pay off Yale. Pay off your back taxes.
575 00:20:27,190 00:20:28,559 I don't owe any back taxes. I don't owe any back taxes.
576 00:20:28,589 00:20:30,129 Oh, right, that's me. Oh, right, that's me.
577 00:20:30,159 00:20:32,258 Look, Chris, you're very nice to offer, Look, Chris, you're very nice to offer,
578 00:20:32,298 00:20:34,227 and I love that you're so excited about it. and I love that you're so excited about it.
579 00:20:34,267 00:20:37,625 It's great to see you like this, but I'm fine. It's great to see you like this, but I'm fine.
580 00:20:37,665 00:20:39,095 You're too UN-materialistic. You're too UN-materialistic.
581 00:20:39,135 00:20:41,034 You know, I've always thought that. You know, I've always thought that.
582 00:20:41,064 00:20:43,263 I'll talk to Rory, see if she wants a brewery or a Bentley. I'll talk to Rory, see if she wants a brewery or a Bentley.
583 00:20:43,303 00:20:45,302 Don't forget the castle. Don't forget the castle.
584 00:20:45,332 00:20:47,401 I'll mention the castle. And it doesn't have to be in Ireland. I'll mention the castle. And it doesn't have to be in Ireland.
585 00:20:47,431 00:20:50,240 It can be in Germany, Czech Republic, narnia. It can be in Germany, Czech Republic, narnia.
586 00:20:50,270 00:20:52,109 I'll leave nothing out. Okay. I'll leave nothing out. Okay.
587 00:20:52,139 00:20:54,009 So, you hungry? A little. So, you hungry? A little.
588 00:20:54,039 00:20:56,607 Let's eat. [ Chuckles ] Let's eat. [ Chuckles ]
589 00:20:56,637 00:20:57,607 I'm paying for lunch. I'm paying for lunch.
590 00:20:59,176 00:21:00,676 This is the first club I ever went to. This is the first club I ever went to.
591 00:21:00,706 00:21:02,375 I was underage and snuck in I was underage and snuck in
592 00:21:02,415 00:21:05,184 and saw grandaddy in one of their first concerts. and saw grandaddy in one of their first concerts.
593 00:21:05,214 00:21:07,183 I remember, once, throwing up in that corner, I remember, once, throwing up in that corner,
594 00:21:07,213 00:21:09,352 and some dude slipped in it and had to go to the hospital, and some dude slipped in it and had to go to the hospital,
595 00:21:09,382 00:21:10,712 and I stole the chick he was with and I stole the chick he was with
596 00:21:10,751 00:21:12,951 and shacked up with her for a week and a half. and shacked up with her for a week and a half.
597 00:21:12,981 00:21:14,350 Another fun memory. Another fun memory.
598 00:21:14,390 00:21:15,989 How about it, guys? You about ready to do this? How about it, guys? You about ready to do this?
599 00:21:16,019 00:21:18,018 Just a few more minutes, Gary. Just a few more minutes, Gary.
600 00:21:18,058 00:21:20,158 Where's Zach? I don't know. He's coming separately. Where's Zach? I don't know. He's coming separately.
601 00:21:20,187 00:21:22,556 Here he is. Where you been, man? Here he is. Where you been, man?
602 00:21:22,586 00:21:24,296 Are we punching time cards now? Are we punching time cards now?
603 00:21:24,326 00:21:25,595 You almost missed sound check. You almost missed sound check.
604 00:21:25,625 00:21:27,454 Well, "almost" means I didn't miss it. Well, "almost" means I didn't miss it.
605 00:21:27,494 00:21:29,464 Just set up your amp, okay? Whatever. Just set up your amp, okay? Whatever.
606 00:21:29,494 00:21:31,193 I'm not liking the setup here. I'm not liking the setup here.
607 00:21:31,233 00:21:32,732 This is how we always set up. This is how we always set up.
608 00:21:32,762 00:21:35,461 Do you want it to look stale? Do you want it to look stale?
609 00:21:35,501 00:21:37,200 We're gonna need room for the new guy, too. We're gonna need room for the new guy, too.
610 00:21:37,230 00:21:38,370 New guy? New guy?
611 00:21:38,400 00:21:40,169 Hey, Joel, come over here, buddy. Hey, Joel, come over here, buddy.
612 00:21:40,199 00:21:42,198 This is Joel. He's gonna sit in on tambourine. This is Joel. He's gonna sit in on tambourine.
613 00:21:42,238 00:21:44,367 How you doing? Lane: Good, Joel. How you doing? Lane: Good, Joel.
614 00:21:44,407 00:21:46,566 We added a new guy? On tambourine? We added a new guy? On tambourine?
615 00:21:46,606 00:21:48,106 He's gonna fill out our sound. He's gonna fill out our sound.
616 00:21:48,136 00:21:49,575 The only reason to have a tambourine The only reason to have a tambourine
617 00:21:49,605 00:21:51,344 is if it's being played by a hot chick. is if it's being played by a hot chick.
618 00:21:51,374 00:21:53,274 No offense, Joel, but you're not a hot chick. No offense, Joel, but you're not a hot chick.
619 00:21:53,304 00:21:56,042 Yo, Gary! See this? Remember it. It's mine. Yo, Gary! See this? Remember it. It's mine.
620 00:21:56,072 00:21:58,741 I don't want it sucked into the club's gear. I don't want it sucked into the club's gear.
621 00:21:58,781 00:22:00,480 What, the Gwen Stefani Mike? What, the Gwen Stefani Mike?
622 00:22:00,510 00:22:02,380 It's not a Gwen Stefani Mike, and don't take it. It's not a Gwen Stefani Mike, and don't take it.
623 00:22:02,410 00:22:03,749 You bought that Mike? You bought that Mike?
624 00:22:03,779 00:22:06,018 It means I can crowd surf. The audience loves that. It means I can crowd surf. The audience loves that.
625 00:22:06,048 00:22:08,347 They do. They love crowd surfing... dig. They do. They love crowd surfing... dig.
626 00:22:08,387 00:22:10,686 Figure I'll stage-dive right after our guitar solo. Figure I'll stage-dive right after our guitar solo.
627 00:22:10,716 00:22:13,285 Hey, can I talk to you for a second? Hey, can I talk to you for a second?
628 00:22:13,315 00:22:14,724 What is wrong with you? What is wrong with you?
629 00:22:14,754 00:22:16,454 Nothing, why? Nothing, why?
630 00:22:16,484 00:22:18,723 You added a band member without telling us? You added a band member without telling us?
631 00:22:18,753 00:22:20,422 Well, it's my band, right? Well, it's my band, right?
632 00:22:20,452 00:22:22,521 No, actually, we're supposed to be a democracy. No, actually, we're supposed to be a democracy.
633 00:22:22,561 00:22:24,260 Is this coming from Brian? Is this coming from Brian?
634 00:22:24,290 00:22:26,529 No, it's coming from me. I'm just... Concerned. No, it's coming from me. I'm just... Concerned.
635 00:22:26,559 00:22:28,259 Well, don't be, Well, don't be,
636 00:22:28,299 00:22:30,458 and don't be a huge mega bummer before our big show. and don't be a huge mega bummer before our big show.
637 00:22:30,498 00:22:32,127 That's not cool. That's not cool.
638 00:22:32,167 00:22:34,636 Okay, I'm sorry. Okay, I'm sorry.
639 00:22:42,533 00:22:44,202 [ Cellphone rings ] [ Cellphone rings ]
640 00:22:44,242 00:22:45,302 Hello. Hello.
641 00:22:45,342 00:22:47,141 Hey, it's me. Who's "me"? Hey, it's me. Who's "me"?
642 00:22:47,171 00:22:49,440 Oh, my god. You don't recognize your best friend's voice. Oh, my god. You don't recognize your best friend's voice.
643 00:22:49,470 00:22:51,339 Sorry, Paris. There's noise here. Sorry, Paris. There's noise here.
644 00:22:51,379 00:22:53,038 So I'm returning your call. So I'm returning your call.
645 00:22:53,078 00:22:55,277 Thanks. I just wanted to tell you something. Thanks. I just wanted to tell you something.
646 00:22:55,307 00:22:58,176 [ Rolls tongue ] I'm coming back to Yale. [ Rolls tongue ] I'm coming back to Yale.
647 00:22:58,216 00:22:59,316 What was that sound? What was that sound?
648 00:22:59,346 00:23:00,445 That was a drum roll. That was a drum roll.
649 00:23:00,475 00:23:01,715 You really had to drum roll that? You really had to drum roll that?
650 00:23:01,745 00:23:03,414 Of course you're coming back. Of course you're coming back.
651 00:23:03,444 00:23:05,513 What are you gonna do without a degree, drive a forklift? What are you gonna do without a degree, drive a forklift?
652 00:23:05,553 00:23:07,782 Well, I was calling to ask you if you could keep Well, I was calling to ask you if you could keep
653 00:23:07,812 00:23:10,381 your eyes and ears open for a place for me to live. your eyes and ears open for a place for me to live.
654 00:23:10,421 00:23:12,120 It's going to be tough. It's going to be tough.
655 00:23:12,150 00:23:14,389 Plus, I want to come back to the Yale daily news. Plus, I want to come back to the Yale daily news.
656 00:23:14,419 00:23:16,558 That's a given. Where are you right now, by the way? That's a given. Where are you right now, by the way?
657 00:23:16,588 00:23:18,128 I'm here at the daily news. I'm here at the daily news.
658 00:23:18,158 00:23:20,227 By yourself? No, everyone's here. By yourself? No, everyone's here.
659 00:23:20,257 00:23:22,156 I just like a super-quiet atmosphere... I just like a super-quiet atmosphere...
660 00:23:22,196 00:23:23,655 No extraneous talking, No extraneous talking,
661 00:23:23,695 00:23:26,064 and I've even had the computer keyboards deadened. and I've even had the computer keyboards deadened.
662 00:23:26,094 00:23:28,333 So they're getting no break for Thanksgiving? So they're getting no break for Thanksgiving?
663 00:23:28,363 00:23:30,133 I put up a fold-out paper Turkey, I put up a fold-out paper Turkey,
664 00:23:30,163 00:23:31,562 and I laid out some Oscar Mayer. and I laid out some Oscar Mayer.
665 00:23:31,602 00:23:33,261 Nice. Nice.
666 00:23:33,301 00:23:35,170 Well, keep an eye out for a place for me, okay? Well, keep an eye out for a place for me, okay?
667 00:23:35,200 00:23:38,239 Will do. See you. Thanks, bye. Will do. See you. Thanks, bye.
668 00:23:38,269 00:23:41,668 So... no sign of crying or hair being pulled out. So... no sign of crying or hair being pulled out.
669 00:23:41,708 00:23:43,137 The thing with dad went okay? The thing with dad went okay?
670 00:23:43,167 00:23:45,506 It was fine. He was telling the truth. It was fine. He was telling the truth.
671 00:23:45,536 00:23:47,405 Nothing too horrible, except for the "frings." Nothing too horrible, except for the "frings."
672 00:23:47,435 00:23:50,074 The what? The combo basket of fries and onion rings. The what? The combo basket of fries and onion rings.
673 00:23:50,104 00:23:51,374 Good in theory, but... Good in theory, but...
674 00:23:51,414 00:23:52,743 So what did he want to talk to you about? So what did he want to talk to you about?
675 00:23:52,773 00:23:56,481 Well, his grandfather died. Well, his grandfather died.
676 00:23:56,511 00:23:58,411 Apparently, it was one of those UN-sad deaths, Apparently, it was one of those UN-sad deaths,
677 00:23:58,451 00:23:59,510 like buddy hackett. like buddy hackett.
678 00:23:59,550 00:24:01,219 No one was sad about buddy hackett? No one was sad about buddy hackett?
679 00:24:01,249 00:24:02,549 No one I saw on the news. No one I saw on the news.
680 00:24:02,579 00:24:05,288 Anyway, he left Chris money, a lot of money, Anyway, he left Chris money, a lot of money,
681 00:24:05,318 00:24:07,587 and now he's offering to shower us with it. and now he's offering to shower us with it.
682 00:24:07,617 00:24:09,456 Want a Bentley? I don't think so. Want a Bentley? I don't think so.
683 00:24:09,486 00:24:11,325 How about a castle? What would I do with a castle? How about a castle? What would I do with a castle?
684 00:24:11,355 00:24:12,625 I'm relaying the offer. I'm relaying the offer.
685 00:24:12,655 00:24:14,254 Dad should keep the money for himself. Dad should keep the money for himself.
686 00:24:14,294 00:24:15,693 Are you sure there's nothing you want? Are you sure there's nothing you want?
687 00:24:15,723 00:24:17,623 A brewery, a faberge egg, or what else did he mention? A brewery, a faberge egg, or what else did he mention?
688 00:24:17,653 00:24:21,461 Paying for Yale through a phd, vacations, Paying for Yale through a phd, vacations,
689 00:24:21,491 00:24:23,090 a Cannon from the civil war... a Cannon from the civil war...
690 00:24:23,130 00:24:25,229 Functioning, by the way, so it's not just for show. Functioning, by the way, so it's not just for show.
691 00:24:25,259 00:24:26,729 It seemed like the sky was the limit, It seemed like the sky was the limit,
692 00:24:26,759 00:24:28,568 although he didn't mention the hoover dam, although he didn't mention the hoover dam,
693 00:24:28,598 00:24:30,267 so maybe there is a cap of some sort. so maybe there is a cap of some sort.
694 00:24:30,297 00:24:32,796 Actually, I think maybe there is something I want. Actually, I think maybe there is something I want.
695 00:24:32,836 00:24:34,705 Really? Okay, what? Really? Okay, what?
696 00:24:34,735 00:24:36,634 I would maybe let him pay for Yale. I would maybe let him pay for Yale.
697 00:24:36,664 00:24:37,704 Seriously? Seriously?
698 00:24:37,734 00:24:38,834 Yeah. Yeah.
699 00:24:38,874 00:24:40,773 Wow. Unless it's too much. Wow. Unless it's too much.
700 00:24:40,803 00:24:43,302 I think it was the cheapest of all the things he mentioned. I think it was the cheapest of all the things he mentioned.
701 00:24:43,342 00:24:45,671 There would be residual benefits. There would be residual benefits.
702 00:24:45,711 00:24:47,610 It would get me out from under grandma and grandpa's thumb, It would get me out from under grandma and grandpa's thumb,
703 00:24:47,640 00:24:49,209 which sounds really good to me. which sounds really good to me.
704 00:24:49,239 00:24:51,208 Well, I can't say I don't relate. Well, I can't say I don't relate.
705 00:24:51,248 00:24:53,277 I don't want them to be holding anything over my head. I don't want them to be holding anything over my head.
706 00:24:53,307 00:24:54,747 I don't want to owe them anything. I don't want to owe them anything.
707 00:24:54,777 00:24:56,846 There's too much pressure, too much expected. There's too much pressure, too much expected.
708 00:24:56,876 00:24:59,085 There are too many strings with these people. There are too many strings with these people.
709 00:24:59,115 00:25:00,614 Okay, I'm getting very uncomfortable Okay, I'm getting very uncomfortable
710 00:25:00,644 00:25:02,753 with the "freaky Friday" moment we've got going on here with the "freaky Friday" moment we've got going on here
711 00:25:02,783 00:25:04,523 'cause it means I have to go to Yale, 'cause it means I have to go to Yale,
712 00:25:04,553 00:25:06,822 you have to run the inn, and I don't even like thinking you have to run the inn, and I don't even like thinking
713 00:25:06,852 00:25:08,451 about what it would mean for Luke. about what it would mean for Luke.
714 00:25:08,491 00:25:10,290 It's feeling better by the second, this idea. It's feeling better by the second, this idea.
715 00:25:10,320 00:25:11,690 You do understand You do understand
716 00:25:11,720 00:25:13,659 you'd basically be cutting mom and dad off. you'd basically be cutting mom and dad off.
717 00:25:13,689 00:25:15,488 You don't know what it was like to be living there. You don't know what it was like to be living there.
718 00:25:15,528 00:25:17,557 Hello? Oppressed one, class of '85. Hello? Oppressed one, class of '85.
719 00:25:17,587 00:25:20,256 But you got out. No, no. You were only there for three months. But you got out. No, no. You were only there for three months.
720 00:25:20,296 00:25:22,365 You're not in my league. We can't swap war stories yet. You're not in my league. We can't swap war stories yet.
721 00:25:22,395 00:25:24,764 They had their reverend come over They had their reverend come over
722 00:25:24,794 00:25:26,164 to talk me out of having sex. to talk me out of having sex.
723 00:25:26,194 00:25:27,363 They never did that to you. They never did that to you.
724 00:25:27,393 00:25:29,202 Five times they did that to me. Five times they did that to me.
725 00:25:29,232 00:25:30,802 The last time, they triple-teamed me The last time, they triple-teamed me
726 00:25:30,832 00:25:32,871 with a priest, a rabbi, and a mormon missionary. with a priest, a rabbi, and a mormon missionary.
727 00:25:32,901 00:25:34,740 I made so many jokes that night, I made so many jokes that night,
728 00:25:34,770 00:25:37,699 I should have had a microphone and a brick wall behind me. I should have had a microphone and a brick wall behind me.
729 00:25:37,739 00:25:40,438 And I never got a $40,000 sex house. And I never got a $40,000 sex house.
730 00:25:40,468 00:25:42,637 A what? You don't want to know. A what? You don't want to know.
731 00:25:42,677 00:25:44,346 Look, I know it's a slippery slope. Look, I know it's a slippery slope.
732 00:25:44,376 00:25:46,775 Dad is dad. Yes, he is. Dad is dad. Yes, he is.
733 00:25:46,805 00:25:49,314 But I'm pretty sure I want to do this. But I'm pretty sure I want to do this.
734 00:25:49,344 00:25:52,213 Well, if you're sure, you're sure. Well, if you're sure, you're sure.
735 00:25:52,243 00:25:53,582 We'll call him. We'll call him. We'll call him. We'll call him.
736 00:25:53,612 00:25:55,681 He's gonna be happy. Not as happy as me. He's gonna be happy. Not as happy as me.
737 00:25:55,711 00:25:56,681 Good. Good.
738 00:26:03,248 00:26:04,457 Hey. Hey! Hey. Hey!
739 00:26:04,487 00:26:06,856 Wow! You look almost intimidatingly cool. Wow! You look almost intimidatingly cool.
740 00:26:06,886 00:26:08,586 Thanks. Everyone ready? Thanks. Everyone ready?
741 00:26:08,626 00:26:10,825 Pretty much, although sound check was a little weird. Pretty much, although sound check was a little weird.
742 00:26:10,855 00:26:13,494 Well, you know what they say... Weird sound check, good gig. Well, you know what they say... Weird sound check, good gig.
743 00:26:13,524 00:26:17,222 Who says that? Well, just me, but I'm hoping it'll catch on. Who says that? Well, just me, but I'm hoping it'll catch on.
744 00:26:17,262 00:26:19,831 See those two guys? Those are the label guys. See those two guys? Those are the label guys.
745 00:26:19,861 00:26:22,200 Oh, I'll be careful not to hurt them Oh, I'll be careful not to hurt them
746 00:26:22,230 00:26:24,429 when I start violently slam dancing. when I start violently slam dancing.
747 00:26:24,469 00:26:25,728 You're gonna be great. You're gonna be great.
748 00:26:25,768 00:26:27,198 Thanks. I should get back there. Thanks. I should get back there.
749 00:26:27,228 00:26:29,367 We have this pre-show thing we always do. We have this pre-show thing we always do.
750 00:26:29,397 00:26:31,096 Good luck. Good luck.
751 00:26:33,265 00:26:35,434 Test. Test. Test. Test. Test. Test.
752 00:26:35,474 00:26:38,303 Monitor check. Monitor check! Monitor check. Monitor check!
753 00:26:38,343 00:26:39,802 Test. Test. Test. Test. Test. Test. Test. Test.
754 00:26:39,842 00:26:41,842 Where did they get these monitors, the kremlin? Where did they get these monitors, the kremlin?
755 00:26:41,872 00:26:43,571 It's your wireless Mike, dude. It's your wireless Mike, dude.
756 00:26:43,611 00:26:45,910 Did somebody touch it? Because it was working before. Did somebody touch it? Because it was working before.
757 00:26:45,940 00:26:48,509 One minute, guys. Who said one minute? We go on when we go on. One minute, guys. Who said one minute? We go on when we go on.
758 00:26:48,549 00:26:50,748 No one tells axl Rose when he goes on. No one tells axl Rose when he goes on.
759 00:26:50,778 00:26:52,417 You're comparing yourself to axl Rose? You're comparing yourself to axl Rose?
760 00:26:52,447 00:26:53,916 Don't get in my face, Brian. I'm not. Don't get in my face, Brian. I'm not.
761 00:26:53,946 00:26:56,146 Go write some more songs. Go write some more songs.
762 00:26:56,186 00:26:59,354 Gary: All right! Welcome to the new Vic! Gary: All right! Welcome to the new Vic!
763 00:26:59,384 00:27:01,483 Listen, we're throwing out the set list. Listen, we're throwing out the set list.
764 00:27:01,523 00:27:03,722 I'm gonna be calling out tunes like Jack white. I'm gonna be calling out tunes like Jack white.
765 00:27:03,752 00:27:05,652 But we rehearsed in this order. We've got transitions. But we rehearsed in this order. We've got transitions.
766 00:27:05,691 00:27:08,220 Yeah, reo speedwagon had transitions, too. Yeah, reo speedwagon had transitions, too.
767 00:27:08,260 00:27:09,590 You want to be reo speedwagon? You want to be reo speedwagon?
768 00:27:09,620 00:27:11,729 We should have brought the smoke machine. We should have brought the smoke machine.
769 00:27:11,759 00:27:13,588 Gary: We got a special showcase for you tonight, Gary: We got a special showcase for you tonight,
770 00:27:13,628 00:27:17,526 so put your hands together for Connecticut's own hep alien. so put your hands together for Connecticut's own hep alien.
771 00:27:17,556 00:27:19,526 We didn't do our lucky pre-show thing. We didn't do our lucky pre-show thing.
772 00:27:19,566 00:27:20,925 Lane, count it down! Lane, count it down!
773 00:27:20,965 00:27:22,664 What are we playing? Yeah, what are we playing? What are we playing? Yeah, what are we playing?
774 00:27:22,694 00:27:25,433 Check, one, two. Check, check. Check, one, two. Check, check.
775 00:27:25,463 00:27:27,502 I need to be hotter on the monitors, Gary. I need to be hotter on the monitors, Gary.
776 00:27:27,532 00:27:31,401 Wake up, dude. Come on, let's start. Wake up, dude. Come on, let's start.
777 00:27:31,441 00:27:33,440 We'll start when I'm ready. This is my stage. We'll start when I'm ready. This is my stage.
778 00:27:33,470 00:27:35,369 Come on, let's do "Rebecca." Come on, let's do "Rebecca."
779 00:27:35,409 00:27:37,308 It's worth waiting around to see the band It's worth waiting around to see the band
780 00:27:37,338 00:27:39,607 that's gonna get the biggest record deal in history. that's gonna get the biggest record deal in history.
781 00:27:39,637 00:27:42,206 Play! Yeah, play! Play! Yeah, play!
782 00:27:42,246 00:27:43,406 This is pathetic. This is pathetic.
783 00:27:43,446 00:27:44,715 You guys suck! You guys suck!
784 00:27:44,745 00:27:45,914 "Free bird"! "Free bird"!
785 00:27:45,944 00:27:48,413 [ Bass plays ] Hey, knock it off. [ Bass plays ] Hey, knock it off.
786 00:27:48,443 00:27:49,643 Knock what off? You know what you're doing. Knock what off? You know what you're doing.
787 00:27:49,683 00:27:51,852 Get back to your Mike. Get back! Get back to your Mike. Get back!
788 00:27:51,882 00:27:53,281 Zach! Don't kick him. Zach! Don't kick him.
789 00:27:53,311 00:27:55,520 Get off my stage if you got a problem. Get off my stage if you got a problem.
790 00:27:55,550 00:27:58,819 Nobody's gonna tell me what to do on my stage with my band. Nobody's gonna tell me what to do on my stage with my band.
791 00:27:58,849 00:28:01,858 Dude, you need to find another place to stand. Dude, you need to find another place to stand.
792 00:28:01,888 00:28:03,487 If he moves, he gonna block Lane. If he moves, he gonna block Lane.
793 00:28:03,517 00:28:05,226 You don't want Lane blocked, do you? You don't want Lane blocked, do you?
794 00:28:05,256 00:28:06,326 Come on! Come on!
795 00:28:06,356 00:28:07,755 This is a song called "Stella." This is a song called "Stella."
796 00:28:07,785 00:28:09,255 We haven't learned that song. We haven't learned that song.
797 00:28:09,295 00:28:10,894 Let's go back to the set list. Let's go back to the set list.
798 00:28:10,924 00:28:14,332 I'm here to destroy the system, so stay out of my way. I'm here to destroy the system, so stay out of my way.
799 00:28:14,362 00:28:16,332 Hey! And you need a... Hey! And you need a...
800 00:28:16,362 00:28:18,201 [ audience shouting ] [ audience shouting ]
801 00:28:19,660 00:28:20,800 [ Booing ] [ Booing ]
802 00:28:47,878 00:28:50,877 Dude broke my wireless Mike. Dude broke my wireless Mike.
803 00:28:50,917 00:28:52,416 Zach, what is wrong with you? Zach, what is wrong with you?
804 00:28:52,446 00:28:53,546 Nothing. Nothing.
805 00:28:53,586 00:28:55,615 Nothing? This was a disaster. Nothing? This was a disaster.
806 00:28:55,655 00:28:56,815 The guys from the label were there. The guys from the label were there.
807 00:28:56,855 00:28:59,453 They showed up. It was our shot. They showed up. It was our shot.
808 00:28:59,483 00:29:00,923 We worked so hard to get to this point, We worked so hard to get to this point,
809 00:29:00,953 00:29:02,392 and we blew our big shot. and we blew our big shot.
810 00:29:02,422 00:29:04,221 What the hell is wrong with you? What the hell is wrong with you?
811 00:29:04,261 00:29:05,761 [ Sighs ] [ Sighs ]
812 00:29:07,390 00:29:08,660 You let me down tonight. You let me down tonight.
813 00:29:08,690 00:29:10,759 You let down Gil. You let down Brian. You let down Gil. You let down Brian.
814 00:29:10,789 00:29:13,258 I don't want to hear about Brian. Zach! I don't want to hear about Brian. Zach!
815 00:29:13,298 00:29:16,326 This is what it is, okay? This is what it is, okay?
816 00:29:16,366 00:29:18,735 Maybe this is why people in bands shouldn't date. Maybe this is why people in bands shouldn't date.
817 00:29:21,604 00:29:23,433 Yeah. Yeah.
818 00:29:26,702 00:29:28,301 I guess so. I guess so.
819 00:29:37,307 00:29:38,347 Hey, guys. Hey, guys.
820 00:29:38,377 00:29:40,276 Happy Thanksgiving. Hi, dad. Happy Thanksgiving. Hi, dad.
821 00:29:40,306 00:29:42,015 Come here, you. [ Smooches ] Come here, you. [ Smooches ]
822 00:29:42,045 00:29:44,444 God, I've missed you. God, I've missed you.
823 00:29:44,484 00:29:46,284 Have you grown? She's grown. Have you grown? She's grown.
824 00:29:46,314 00:29:47,813 Only in my estimation. Only in my estimation.
825 00:29:47,843 00:29:50,582 I cannot tell you how jazzed I am to see you on Thanksgiving. I cannot tell you how jazzed I am to see you on Thanksgiving.
826 00:29:50,612 00:29:52,651 We have never seen each other on Thanksgiving. We have never seen each other on Thanksgiving.
827 00:29:52,681 00:29:53,720 Oh, god, is that true? Oh, god, is that true?
828 00:29:53,750 00:29:56,319 I think so. I know so. I think so. I know so.
829 00:29:56,349 00:29:58,758 So what's this about? So what's this about?
830 00:29:58,788 00:30:01,287 I filled Rory in. I mentioned the brewery and the castle. I filled Rory in. I mentioned the brewery and the castle.
831 00:30:01,327 00:30:03,256 The oompa loompas? Those, too. The oompa loompas? Those, too.
832 00:30:03,286 00:30:05,955 And, um... Well, you want to take it? And, um... Well, you want to take it?
833 00:30:05,995 00:30:07,825 Sure. Sure.
834 00:30:07,855 00:30:10,923 Dad, I thought about it, Dad, I thought about it,
835 00:30:10,963 00:30:12,992 and mom and I talked about it, and mom and I talked about it,
836 00:30:13,032 00:30:15,631 and I think it would be really great and I think it would be really great
837 00:30:15,661 00:30:17,630 if you could pay for Yale. if you could pay for Yale.
838 00:30:17,660 00:30:20,369 Absolutely, absolutely. Nothing would make me happier. Absolutely, absolutely. Nothing would make me happier.
839 00:30:20,399 00:30:21,839 Good, thank you. Good, thank you.
840 00:30:21,869 00:30:24,567 I am there. I am so there. That's great. I am there. I am so there. That's great.
841 00:30:24,607 00:30:25,907 Let me pay for chilton, too. Let me pay for chilton, too.
842 00:30:25,937 00:30:27,436 That's already taken care of. That's already taken care of.
843 00:30:27,466 00:30:29,605 You know, Yale's kind of expensive. You know, Yale's kind of expensive.
844 00:30:29,635 00:30:31,804 But I'm loaded. Didn't you tell her? But I'm loaded. Didn't you tell her?
845 00:30:31,844 00:30:33,604 I told her. I told her.
846 00:30:33,644 00:30:35,343 Do I give you the cash, or do I pay Yale? Do I give you the cash, or do I pay Yale?
847 00:30:35,373 00:30:37,572 Do they take checks, or does it have to be a money order? Do they take checks, or does it have to be a money order?
848 00:30:37,612 00:30:39,981 What is a money order, anyway? How's it different from a check? What is a money order, anyway? How's it different from a check?
849 00:30:40,011 00:30:41,980 Isn't a check a piece of paper forwarding money? Isn't a check a piece of paper forwarding money?
850 00:30:42,010 00:30:43,709 Whoa, Chris, slow down. Whoa, Chris, slow down.
851 00:30:43,749 00:30:45,948 This makes me so happy. I can't tell you, Rory. This makes me so happy. I can't tell you, Rory.
852 00:30:45,978 00:30:47,378 It means a lot to me. It means a lot to me.
853 00:30:47,418 00:30:49,417 This was excellent timing, believe me. This was excellent timing, believe me.
854 00:30:49,447 00:30:50,816 Well, it means more to me. Well, it means more to me.
855 00:30:50,846 00:30:52,286 [ Cellphone rings ] [ Cellphone rings ]
856 00:30:52,316 00:30:54,755 This is the paper in stamford. This is the paper in stamford.
857 00:30:54,785 00:30:56,584 Hey, try to steal a pie on your way out. Hey, try to steal a pie on your way out.
858 00:30:56,624 00:30:57,953 Okay. Okay.
859 00:30:59,453 00:31:01,692 [ Sighs ] [ Sighs ]
860 00:31:01,722 00:31:03,391 Thanks for making this happen, lor. Thanks for making this happen, lor.
861 00:31:03,421 00:31:05,660 Hey, it wasn't me. It's what she wanted. Hey, it wasn't me. It's what she wanted.
862 00:31:05,690 00:31:07,859 Well, thanks for giving her the choice. My pleasure. Well, thanks for giving her the choice. My pleasure.
863 00:31:07,889 00:31:10,498 So can I ask you something? Sure. So can I ask you something? Sure.
864 00:31:10,528 00:31:12,867 It involves the "e" word and the "r" word. It involves the "e" word and the "r" word.
865 00:31:12,897 00:31:15,496 Oh, please, let's not discuss evolution or recycling. Oh, please, let's not discuss evolution or recycling.
866 00:31:15,536 00:31:16,895 They're just too hot button. They're just too hot button.
867 00:31:16,935 00:31:19,034 Weren't Emily and Richard paying for Yale? Weren't Emily and Richard paying for Yale?
868 00:31:19,064 00:31:21,633 Yes, they were. Something going on there? Yes, they were. Something going on there?
869 00:31:21,673 00:31:22,673 Everything's fine. Everything's fine.
870 00:31:22,703 00:31:24,472 Why'd she take time off? Why'd she take time off?
871 00:31:24,502 00:31:26,941 It's a long story. It's a long story.
872 00:31:26,971 00:31:28,970 Listen, Chris, just so we're clear. Listen, Chris, just so we're clear.
873 00:31:29,010 00:31:32,479 We're clear. I'm providing... that's it. We're clear. I'm providing... that's it.
874 00:31:32,509 00:31:34,578 I'm just doing what I should have done years ago. I'm just doing what I should have done years ago.
875 00:31:34,608 00:31:35,707 Good. Good.
876 00:31:35,747 00:31:37,876 And it will remain good, honest. And it will remain good, honest.
877 00:31:37,906 00:31:39,976 Okay. Okay.
878 00:31:40,016 00:31:43,614 So how long have you been engaged? So how long have you been engaged?
879 00:31:43,644 00:31:44,684 [ Sighs ] Who told you? [ Sighs ] Who told you?
880 00:31:44,714 00:31:46,613 [ Laughing ] Your finger. [ Laughing ] Your finger.
881 00:31:46,653 00:31:48,522 Oh. Blabbermouth. Oh. Blabbermouth.
882 00:31:48,552 00:31:51,551 It's a good thing. I want you happy. I always have. It's a good thing. I want you happy. I always have.
883 00:31:51,591 00:31:53,320 I know. Thank you. I know. Thank you.
884 00:31:53,350 00:31:54,859 But this isn't gonna be a weird thing But this isn't gonna be a weird thing
885 00:31:54,889 00:31:56,818 with you and him is it... My paying for Yale? with you and him is it... My paying for Yale?
886 00:31:56,858 00:31:58,588 No, it's not gonna be. No, it's not gonna be.
887 00:31:58,628 00:32:00,987 Cool. Cool.
888 00:32:01,027 00:32:02,926 You're getting a rolls for a wedding present, you know. You're getting a rolls for a wedding present, you know.
889 00:32:02,956 00:32:05,965 Cool. I should register for a driver to go with it. Cool. I should register for a driver to go with it.
890 00:32:05,995 00:32:08,394 Well, yeah, they're too big to drive by yourself. Well, yeah, they're too big to drive by yourself.
891 00:32:08,434 00:32:09,793 No, god, you got to have somebody to drive you. No, god, you got to have somebody to drive you.
892 00:32:09,833 00:32:12,662 Bye now. Have a nice... [ Thud ] Bye now. Have a nice... [ Thud ]
893 00:32:12,702 00:32:14,871 Thanksgiving. Huh? Thanksgiving. Huh?
894 00:32:17,670 00:32:19,539 My rolls exploded. My rolls exploded.
895 00:32:19,569 00:32:20,798 What do you mean, they "exploded"? What do you mean, they "exploded"?
896 00:32:20,838 00:32:23,067 They turned black, and they exploded. They turned black, and they exploded.
897 00:32:23,107 00:32:24,707 Well, clean it up. I'm not gonna... Well, clean it up. I'm not gonna...
898 00:32:24,737 00:32:26,736 My Turkey! My Turkey!
899 00:32:26,776 00:32:28,505 Liz! Liz!
900 00:32:31,744 00:32:33,413 Oh, boy! Oh, boy! Oh, boy! Oh, boy!
901 00:32:33,443 00:32:35,612 It's like motley crue's been here. It's like motley crue's been here.
902 00:32:35,642 00:32:38,551 Good, that red-button thingy hasn't popped out yet. Good, that red-button thingy hasn't popped out yet.
903 00:32:38,581 00:32:40,550 You're way overcooking your stuffing here. You're way overcooking your stuffing here.
904 00:32:40,580 00:32:42,849 Hey, how do you turn on your oven light? Hey, how do you turn on your oven light?
905 00:32:42,879 00:32:44,019 Never mind, I'll check my Martha. Never mind, I'll check my Martha.
906 00:32:44,049 00:32:45,548 Yeah, how to turn on my oven light Yeah, how to turn on my oven light
907 00:32:45,588 00:32:47,647 is not gonna be in your Martha Stewart book. is not gonna be in your Martha Stewart book.
908 00:32:47,687 00:32:50,786 Hey, that red pop-up thingy... Are turkeys born with that, Hey, that red pop-up thingy... Are turkeys born with that,
909 00:32:50,816 00:32:52,655 or is that something they put in? or is that something they put in?
910 00:32:52,685 00:32:53,884 Why don't you ask Martha? Why don't you ask Martha?
911 00:32:53,924 00:32:55,724 Oh, she knows. She knows everything. Oh, she knows. She knows everything.
912 00:32:55,754 00:32:57,853 You're gonna have to get some canned cranberry sauce. You're gonna have to get some canned cranberry sauce.
913 00:32:57,893 00:33:01,431 Your homemade... Well... It's not red. Your homemade... Well... It's not red.
914 00:33:01,461 00:33:02,731 It should be red. It should be red.
915 00:33:02,761 00:33:05,060 I know. I don't know how that happened. I know. I don't know how that happened.
916 00:33:05,100 00:33:07,998 Well, everything seems kind of under control here. Well, everything seems kind of under control here.
917 00:33:08,028 00:33:09,828 Thanks, Luke. I'm so sorry. Thanks, Luke. I'm so sorry.
918 00:33:09,868 00:33:13,396 T.j. Thought the microwave was working, but I guess not. T.j. Thought the microwave was working, but I guess not.
919 00:33:13,436 00:33:15,335 It's okay. It's okay.
920 00:33:17,834 00:33:19,673 [ Sighs ] Liz... [ Sighs ] Liz...
921 00:33:19,703 00:33:23,672 Look at Martha's hands. They are so white. Look at Martha's hands. They are so white.
922 00:33:23,702 00:33:26,870 Liz, you got a minute? Liz, you got a minute?
923 00:33:26,910 00:33:29,979 Yeah, big brother, I got a minute. Yeah, big brother, I got a minute.
924 00:33:32,048 00:33:33,578 [ Sighs ] [ Sighs ]
925 00:33:35,477 00:33:38,485 Um... this is hard. Um... this is hard.
926 00:33:38,515 00:33:40,685 I feel like this giant weight's been sitting on me. I feel like this giant weight's been sitting on me.
927 00:33:40,715 00:33:42,814 I just need someone to talk to. I just need someone to talk to.
928 00:33:42,854 00:33:45,383 Well, then talk. Well, then talk.
929 00:33:47,452 00:33:49,121 [ Sighs ] [ Sighs ]
930 00:33:49,151 00:33:51,760 I've got a kid. I've got a kid.
931 00:33:51,790 00:33:53,859 A kid? You've got a kid? A kid? You've got a kid?
932 00:33:53,889 00:33:57,627 A girl, a little girl. She's 12. A girl, a little girl. She's 12.
933 00:33:57,657 00:33:59,127 I am her father. I am her father.
934 00:33:59,157 00:34:01,156 Oh, boy! Oh, boy! Oh, boy! Oh, boy!
935 00:34:01,196 00:34:03,795 She came to the diner out of the blue. She came to the diner out of the blue.
936 00:34:03,825 00:34:06,664 She was testing to see who her father was. She was testing to see who her father was.
937 00:34:06,694 00:34:08,603 Not for money or anything... Not for money or anything...
938 00:34:08,633 00:34:11,132 It was for this science fair she was in. It was for this science fair she was in.
939 00:34:11,162 00:34:12,731 She's smart. She's smart.
940 00:34:12,771 00:34:14,540 Oh, boy. Oh, boy. Oh, boy. Oh, boy.
941 00:34:14,570 00:34:16,769 So I went down to the fair, So I went down to the fair,
942 00:34:16,799 00:34:20,608 and there she was, you know, and there I was... and there she was, you know, and there I was...
943 00:34:20,638 00:34:24,676 My picture, the DNA test. [ Chuckles ] My picture, the DNA test. [ Chuckles ]
944 00:34:24,706 00:34:26,705 She's mine. She's mine.
945 00:34:26,745 00:34:28,644 12, huh? 12. 12, huh? 12.
946 00:34:28,674 00:34:30,573 It's Anna nardini, isn't it? It's Anna nardini, isn't it?
947 00:34:30,613 00:34:31,743 How'd you know? How'd you know?
948 00:34:31,783 00:34:33,182 Luke, you're not Warren Beatty. Luke, you're not Warren Beatty.
949 00:34:33,212 00:34:34,852 I mean, you could have been. I mean, you could have been.
950 00:34:34,882 00:34:37,481 Girls like you, but you're a serial monogamist. Girls like you, but you're a serial monogamist.
951 00:34:37,511 00:34:39,680 That's why you're you. That's why you're you.
952 00:34:39,720 00:34:41,619 I remember Anna. I liked her. I remember Anna. I liked her.
953 00:34:41,649 00:34:45,687 I don't know what to do. I'm just so confused. I don't know what to do. I'm just so confused.
954 00:34:45,717 00:34:47,087 Well, what did Lorelai say? Well, what did Lorelai say?
955 00:34:48,556 00:34:50,555 You haven't told her. You haven't told her.
956 00:34:50,585 00:34:52,894 We're engaged. We're on track here, her and me. We're engaged. We're on track here, her and me.
957 00:34:52,924 00:34:54,863 Rory's back, so that's settled now. Rory's back, so that's settled now.
958 00:34:54,893 00:34:57,192 We're in a good place, and this could wreck it. We're in a good place, and this could wreck it.
959 00:34:57,222 00:34:59,561 It won't wreck it, not unless you let it. It won't wreck it, not unless you let it.
960 00:34:59,591 00:35:01,930 She's been out there 12 years, this little girl. She's been out there 12 years, this little girl.
961 00:35:01,960 00:35:03,729 What does Anna want from you? What does Anna want from you?
962 00:35:03,759 00:35:06,598 That's the thing... nothing. She hasn't contacted me. That's the thing... nothing. She hasn't contacted me.
963 00:35:06,628 00:35:09,537 Why hasn't she? She could have called me. Why hasn't she? She could have called me.
964 00:35:09,567 00:35:12,166 What, does she think I'd be a deadbeat? What, does she think I'd be a deadbeat?
965 00:35:12,206 00:35:14,035 [ Laughs ] No one would think that. [ Laughs ] No one would think that.
966 00:35:14,065 00:35:15,475 April doesn't want anything either. April doesn't want anything either.
967 00:35:15,504 00:35:17,074 That's her name... April. That's her name... April.
968 00:35:17,104 00:35:20,842 It's all just very scientific with her. It's all just very scientific with her.
969 00:35:20,872 00:35:24,011 I couldn't even get her to go for ice cream with me. I couldn't even get her to go for ice cream with me.
970 00:35:24,041 00:35:27,939 Well... Did you offer cake? Well... Did you offer cake?
971 00:35:27,979 00:35:29,109 No. No.
972 00:35:29,149 00:35:30,878 Maybe she wanted cake or pie. Maybe she wanted cake or pie.
973 00:35:30,908 00:35:32,517 You offer pie? No. You offer pie? No.
974 00:35:32,547 00:35:34,546 Maybe she wanted pie... Or fudge. Maybe she wanted pie... Or fudge.
975 00:35:34,586 00:35:36,546 It's not about what I offered her, Liz. It's not about what I offered her, Liz.
976 00:35:36,586 00:35:38,685 She didn't have any interest. She didn't have any interest.
977 00:35:38,715 00:35:43,053 You know, that's the thing. Why should I feel burdened? You know, that's the thing. Why should I feel burdened?
978 00:35:43,083 00:35:45,622 I mean, they're not reaching out, neither one of them. I mean, they're not reaching out, neither one of them.
979 00:35:45,652 00:35:46,991 So why should I? So why should I?
980 00:35:47,021 00:35:49,020 I don't know. The girl's got her life. I don't know. The girl's got her life.
981 00:35:49,060 00:35:52,589 She seems very adjusted... A little weird, but thriving. She seems very adjusted... A little weird, but thriving.
982 00:35:52,629 00:35:56,527 Anna's got her life. I've got my life, you know? Anna's got her life. I've got my life, you know?
983 00:35:56,557 00:35:58,696 I shouldn't worry about this. I shouldn't worry about this.
984 00:35:58,726 00:36:01,635 I mean, why should I? There's no reason to. I mean, why should I? There's no reason to.
985 00:36:01,665 00:36:02,834 I guess not. I guess not.
986 00:36:02,864 00:36:05,903 Good, good. [ Exhales sharply ] Good, good. [ Exhales sharply ]
987 00:36:05,933 00:36:08,872 I'm not gonna worry. I'm gonna let it go. I'm not gonna worry. I'm gonna let it go.
988 00:36:08,902 00:36:11,231 This has been good. This has been good.
989 00:36:11,271 00:36:14,610 Thanks for listening, Liz. I feel better. Thanks for listening, Liz. I feel better.
990 00:36:14,640 00:36:17,068 You should get back to your food there. You should get back to your food there.
991 00:36:17,108 00:36:19,078 This is settled. This is settled.
992 00:36:19,108 00:36:20,477 Okay. Okay.
993 00:36:20,507 00:36:23,506 There's your Martha. There's your Martha.
994 00:36:23,546 00:36:24,515 Thanks. Thanks.
995 00:36:31,952 00:36:32,952 Oh. Oh.
996 00:36:34,981 00:36:36,680 Everyone's here. Everyone's hungry. Everyone's here. Everyone's hungry.
997 00:36:36,720 00:36:38,250 Perfect timing 'cause treat, Chuck, Perfect timing 'cause treat, Chuck,
998 00:36:38,280 00:36:40,019 and Bob here are ready to be consumed. and Bob here are ready to be consumed.
999 00:36:40,049 00:36:41,888 Please, don't name the food we eat. Sorry. Please, don't name the food we eat. Sorry.
1000 00:36:41,918 00:36:43,587 So are you ready to carve? So are you ready to carve?
1001 00:36:43,617 00:36:45,257 We're ready to carve. I could use some help, though. We're ready to carve. I could use some help, though.
1002 00:36:45,287 00:36:47,785 Maybe send Luke in. He loves to carve. Maybe send Luke in. He loves to carve.
1003 00:36:47,825 00:36:50,055 There's enough food, right? Did I make enough food? There's enough food, right? Did I make enough food?
1004 00:36:50,095 00:36:52,523 There's plenty, even considering the extra guests. There's plenty, even considering the extra guests.
1005 00:36:52,563 00:36:53,963 Go tell them it'll be five minutes. Go tell them it'll be five minutes.
1006 00:36:53,993 00:36:55,462 Will do. Will do.
1007 00:37:01,630 00:37:02,599 Huzzah! Huzzah!
1008 00:37:02,629 00:37:03,999 Nice. Nice.
1009 00:37:04,029 00:37:06,767 You're so good at that, stu, really. You're so good at that, stu, really.
1010 00:37:06,797 00:37:08,137 Too bad you didn't put all that effort Too bad you didn't put all that effort
1011 00:37:08,167 00:37:09,906 into something you could make money at. into something you could make money at.
1012 00:37:09,936 00:37:11,505 Thanks, Liz. Thanks, Liz.
1013 00:37:11,535 00:37:14,074 When are you coming back out on the circuit with us? When are you coming back out on the circuit with us?
1014 00:37:14,104 00:37:16,643 I think sometime after I'm drugged and lobotomized. I think sometime after I'm drugged and lobotomized.
1015 00:37:16,673 00:37:18,073 [ Laughs ] [ Laughs ]
1016 00:37:18,103 00:37:20,812 You're the funniest, smartest guy I know, Luke. You're the funniest, smartest guy I know, Luke.
1017 00:37:20,842 00:37:22,711 I'm calling him yakov from now on. I'm calling him yakov from now on.
1018 00:37:22,741 00:37:24,110 Please don't judge me by this. Please don't judge me by this.
1019 00:37:24,140 00:37:25,879 I won't... Yakov. I won't... Yakov.
1020 00:37:25,909 00:37:27,279 We're just minutes away from eating, everybody. We're just minutes away from eating, everybody.
1021 00:37:27,309 00:37:29,818 Oh, I can't wait to see this meal. Oh, I can't wait to see this meal.
1022 00:37:29,848 00:37:32,147 My dinner didn't turn out like Martha's picture. My dinner didn't turn out like Martha's picture.
1023 00:37:32,187 00:37:35,755 Who knew a Turkey could melt like that? Who knew a Turkey could melt like that?
1024 00:37:35,785 00:37:36,815 Hey, guys, when did you sneak in? Hey, guys, when did you sneak in?
1025 00:37:36,855 00:37:38,784 A couple of minutes ago. A couple of minutes ago.
1026 00:37:38,824 00:37:39,883 How'd you like to carve for us? I'll carve if you want. How'd you like to carve for us? I'll carve if you want.
1027 00:37:39,923 00:37:41,593 Bless you. Bless you.
1028 00:37:41,623 00:37:42,722 Let me talk to you over here for a second first. Let me talk to you over here for a second first.
1029 00:37:42,752 00:37:43,792 Oh, okay. Oh, okay.
1030 00:37:46,191 00:37:47,020 So. So.
1031 00:37:47,060 00:37:47,860 Yeah? Yeah?
1032 00:37:47,890 00:37:49,290 Um... Um...
1033 00:37:49,329 00:37:52,028 That Christopher call from before, the famous one. That Christopher call from before, the famous one.
1034 00:37:52,058 00:37:53,828 The infamous one. Oh, you remember that? The infamous one. Oh, you remember that?
1035 00:37:53,858 00:37:55,267 I remember it. I remember it.
1036 00:37:55,297 00:37:58,865 Well, I never filled you in on the content. Well, I never filled you in on the content.
1037 00:37:58,895 00:38:01,764 He said he wanted to talk, and he said it was important, He said he wanted to talk, and he said it was important,
1038 00:38:01,804 00:38:02,864 so I met up with him. so I met up with him.
1039 00:38:02,904 00:38:04,673 Oh, yeah? Oh, yeah?
1040 00:38:04,703 00:38:08,741 Yeah, and he's come into a lot of money, family money, Yeah, and he's come into a lot of money, family money,
1041 00:38:08,771 00:38:10,740 and he offered Rory and me and he offered Rory and me
1042 00:38:10,770 00:38:12,170 lots of things we didn't want or need, lots of things we didn't want or need,
1043 00:38:12,210 00:38:15,638 but Rory took him up on his offer to pay for Yale. but Rory took him up on his offer to pay for Yale.
1044 00:38:15,678 00:38:17,578 It was her idea, and I support it. It was her idea, and I support it.
1045 00:38:17,608 00:38:18,947 That's it. That's it.
1046 00:38:18,977 00:38:20,946 So he's gonna be financing her tuition So he's gonna be financing her tuition
1047 00:38:20,976 00:38:24,175 this year and next year. this year and next year.
1048 00:38:24,215 00:38:27,114 We got together today at a diner to finalize it. We got together today at a diner to finalize it.
1049 00:38:27,144 00:38:29,852 That's it. That's it.
1050 00:38:29,882 00:38:31,582 I think that's great. I think that's great.
1051 00:38:31,622 00:38:34,151 Really? Yes, I think that's absolutely great. Really? Yes, I think that's absolutely great.
1052 00:38:34,181 00:38:36,020 You heard about how I got together with Christopher? You heard about how I got together with Christopher?
1053 00:38:36,050 00:38:37,919 Absolutely. You had to, to talk about this. Absolutely. You had to, to talk about this.
1054 00:38:37,949 00:38:40,058 He's her dad. He's her dad. He's her dad. He's her dad.
1055 00:38:40,088 00:38:42,727 If he's got something, he should be sharing it. If he's got something, he should be sharing it.
1056 00:38:42,757 00:38:45,226 He's been gone most of the time, so he owes you. He's been gone most of the time, so he owes you.
1057 00:38:45,256 00:38:46,795 I'm glad he's doing it. I'm glad he's doing it.
1058 00:38:46,825 00:38:48,894 He's doing what a dad is supposed to do. He's doing what a dad is supposed to do.
1059 00:38:48,924 00:38:51,093 He's taking care of his kid. Good, good. He's taking care of his kid. Good, good.
1060 00:38:51,123 00:38:53,133 Yeah, good. So you're good with this? Yeah, good. So you're good with this?
1061 00:38:53,163 00:38:54,702 I am. And so we're good? I am. And so we're good?
1062 00:38:54,732 00:38:56,661 We're great. We're great.
1063 00:38:56,701 00:38:59,170 Thank you for understanding. Thank you for understanding.
1064 00:39:01,739 00:39:02,738 I'm gonna go carve. I'm gonna go carve.
1065 00:39:02,768 00:39:03,838 Okay. Okay.
1066 00:39:07,936 00:39:09,706 Oh, Rory, have you met Freddy? Oh, Rory, have you met Freddy?
1067 00:39:09,736 00:39:10,935 He has no thumbs. He has no thumbs.
1068 00:39:10,975 00:39:13,304 No, I haven't. Hi, Freddy. No, I haven't. Hi, Freddy.
1069 00:39:13,344 00:39:15,943 Um... [ Cellphone rings ] Um... [ Cellphone rings ]
1070 00:39:15,973 00:39:17,172 Excuse me. Excuse me.
1071 00:39:19,681 00:39:20,881 Hello? Hello?
1072 00:39:20,911 00:39:23,050 Rory, hi. It's honor huntzberger. Rory, hi. It's honor huntzberger.
1073 00:39:23,080 00:39:24,849 Oh, hi, honor. How are you doing? Oh, hi, honor. How are you doing?
1074 00:39:24,879 00:39:26,179 I've been exiled. I've been exiled.
1075 00:39:26,219 00:39:28,348 My parents' house is 11,000 square feet, My parents' house is 11,000 square feet,
1076 00:39:28,378 00:39:31,246 and smoking is banned from every nook and cranny of it... and smoking is banned from every nook and cranny of it...
1077 00:39:31,286 00:39:33,356 Only because mom stopped smoking again. Only because mom stopped smoking again.
1078 00:39:33,386 00:39:35,824 So here I am, freezing my ass off. Bummer. So here I am, freezing my ass off. Bummer.
1079 00:39:35,854 00:39:37,924 So I thought I'd call and tell you what a drag it is, So I thought I'd call and tell you what a drag it is,
1080 00:39:37,954 00:39:39,153 this thing with you and Logan. this thing with you and Logan.
1081 00:39:39,193 00:39:40,592 Oh, yeah? Oh, yeah?
1082 00:39:40,622 00:39:41,862 When Logan said you two broke up, When Logan said you two broke up,
1083 00:39:41,892 00:39:43,221 I almost threw a lamp at him. I almost threw a lamp at him.
1084 00:39:43,261 00:39:44,661 Oh. Oh.
1085 00:39:44,691 00:39:48,259 Moron... He's his own worst enemy. Moron... He's his own worst enemy.
1086 00:39:48,289 00:39:50,258 He told you that we broke up? He told you that we broke up?
1087 00:39:50,298 00:39:52,168 Well, I was wondering where you were for Thanksgiving, Well, I was wondering where you were for Thanksgiving,
1088 00:39:52,198 00:39:54,896 and, at first, young seacrest hemmed and hawed, and, at first, young seacrest hemmed and hawed,
1089 00:39:54,936 00:39:59,035 which wasn't sufficient, so he finally told me. which wasn't sufficient, so he finally told me.
1090 00:39:59,065 00:40:01,004 Idiot... him, not you. Idiot... him, not you.
1091 00:40:01,034 00:40:02,633 Right. Right.
1092 00:40:02,673 00:40:04,942 I'm so sorry, but you and I can still go shopping. I'm so sorry, but you and I can still go shopping.
1093 00:40:04,972 00:40:06,072 Bergdorf's is calling. Bergdorf's is calling.
1094 00:40:06,102 00:40:08,071 Yeah, sure. Good. Yeah, sure. Good.
1095 00:40:08,101 00:40:09,640 Well, I have to get back inside Well, I have to get back inside
1096 00:40:09,670 00:40:11,040 before I turn into an ice cube. before I turn into an ice cube.
1097 00:40:11,070 00:40:13,009 Are you at least having a nice Thanksgiving? Are you at least having a nice Thanksgiving?
1098 00:40:13,039 00:40:14,608 Yeah, it's really nice. Yeah, it's really nice.
1099 00:40:14,648 00:40:16,877 I'll be in touch. Sure. Thanks, honor. I'll be in touch. Sure. Thanks, honor.
1100 00:40:16,907 00:40:18,616 Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.
1101 00:40:18,646 00:40:19,676 [ Beep ] [ Beep ]
1102 00:40:21,275 00:40:22,945 Okay, that's too thin. Too thin. Okay, that's too thin. Too thin.
1103 00:40:22,985 00:40:25,114 I'm just getting started. Give me some room. I'm just getting started. Give me some room.
1104 00:40:25,154 00:40:27,283 Okay, that's too thick. Too thick. Too thick. Okay, that's too thick. Too thick. Too thick.
1105 00:40:27,313 00:40:29,622 Hang on, Sookie. Hang on, Sookie.
1106 00:40:29,652 00:40:30,681 You're crooked. You're crooked. You're crooked. You're crooked.
1107 00:40:30,721 00:40:32,221 Okay. Good idea. Okay. Good idea.
1108 00:40:42,056 00:40:43,326 [ Sighs ] [ Sighs ]
1109 00:40:43,356 00:40:44,825 [ Dials ] [ Dials ]
1110 00:40:47,764 00:40:50,363 Yeah, nardini. Yeah, nardini.
1111 00:40:50,393 00:40:52,302 Woodbridge. Woodbridge.
1112 00:40:52,332 00:40:53,931 Thanks. Thanks.
1113 00:40:56,800 00:40:57,900 [ Beeps ] [ Beeps ]
1114 00:40:59,999 00:41:01,938 April: Hello, you've reached the nardini residence. April: Hello, you've reached the nardini residence.
1115 00:41:01,968 00:41:03,807 We're not home, We're not home,
1116 00:41:03,837 00:41:05,407 or we're just too distracted to answer right now. or we're just too distracted to answer right now.
1117 00:41:05,437 00:41:08,335 [ Receiver slams ] [ Receiver slams ]
1118 00:41:08,375 00:41:09,845 [ Sighs ] [ Sighs ]
1119 00:41:17,212 00:41:18,881 She kick you out? Huh? Who? She kick you out? Huh? Who?
1120 00:41:18,911 00:41:20,250 Sookie. Yeah. Sookie. Yeah.
1121 00:41:20,280 00:41:21,350 Predictable. Predictable.
1122 00:41:21,380 00:41:23,049 Yeah, predictable. Yeah, predictable.
1123 00:41:23,079 00:41:24,748 Hey, you okay? Hey, you okay?
1124 00:41:24,788 00:41:25,888 Kind of. Kind of.
1125 00:41:25,918 00:41:27,087 You sure? You sure?
1126 00:41:27,117 00:41:29,386 I'm just hungry. I'm just hungry.
1127 00:41:29,416 00:41:31,985 Dinner is served! Dinner is served!
1128 00:41:32,025 00:41:33,985 [ Indistinct talking ] [ Indistinct talking ]
1129 00:41:36,823 00:41:38,053 Man: Look at the Turkey. Man: Look at the Turkey.
1130 00:41:38,093 00:41:39,222 Holy cow. Holy cow.