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| # | Start | End | Original | Translated |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | 00:02:21,321 | 00:02:23,943 | It's them. | It's them. |
| 2 | 00:02:48,139 | 00:02:53,673 | Now, Jack, do exactly what we rehearsed, nothing else. | Now, Jack, do exactly what we rehearsed, nothing else. |
| 3 | 00:02:53,777 | 00:02:57,095 | Say exactly what we agreed, nothing else. | Say exactly what we agreed, nothing else. |
| 4 | 00:02:57,199 | 00:03:00,275 | Certainement, mon Capitain. Ne vous fachez pas. | Certainement, mon Capitain. Ne vous fachez pas. |
| 5 | 00:03:00,735 | 00:03:03,108 | Very good, Jack. | Very good, Jack. |
| 6 | 00:03:09,953 | 00:03:12,030 | - See you later. - Yes. | - See you later. - Yes. |
| 7 | 00:04:02,464 | 00:04:04,338 | Messieurs. | Messieurs. |
| 8 | 00:04:20,732 | 00:04:23,306 | Where is the money? | Where is the money? |
| 9 | 00:04:23,485 | 00:04:27,104 | We would like to see the money. | We would like to see the money. |
| 10 | 00:04:28,156 | 00:04:30,233 | Understand? | Understand? |
| 11 | 00:05:44,899 | 00:05:47,226 | One more. | One more. |
| 12 | 00:06:05,128 | 00:06:07,964 | I don't know, mate. It's nothing to do with me. Honest. | I don't know, mate. It's nothing to do with me. Honest. |
| 13 | 00:06:08,131 | 00:06:09,923 | Marcel! | Marcel! |
| 14 | 00:06:14,888 | 00:06:17,585 | - Get moving. - What about him? | - Get moving. - What about him? |
| 15 | 00:06:17,689 | 00:06:19,094 | Get moving. | Get moving. |
| 16 | 00:06:28,234 | 00:06:30,311 | Get rid of him! | Get rid of him! |
| 17 | 00:06:30,486 | 00:06:33,939 | Lose that bastard. I said, get rid of him! | Lose that bastard. I said, get rid of him! |
| 18 | 00:06:57,347 | 00:06:59,305 | Get out of here. | Get out of here. |
| 19 | 00:08:20,972 | 00:08:22,363 | Dad! | Dad! |
| 20 | 00:08:41,534 | 00:08:44,662 | I'm gonna | I'm gonna |
| 21 | 00:08:45,463 | 00:08:46,854 | die! | die! |
| 22 | 00:08:52,837 | 00:08:57,583 | Somewhere beyond the sea | Somewhere beyond the sea |
| 23 | 00:08:57,759 | 00:09:02,338 | Somewhere waiting for me | Somewhere waiting for me |
| 24 | 00:09:02,513 | 00:09:05,966 | My lover stands on golden sands | My lover stands on golden sands |
| 25 | 00:09:07,185 | 00:09:11,563 | And watches the ships that go sailing | And watches the ships that go sailing |
| 26 | 00:09:13,316 | 00:09:16,022 | Somewhere | Somewhere |
| 27 | 00:09:16,194 | 00:09:21,616 | Beyond the sea she's there watching for me | Beyond the sea she's there watching for me |
| 28 | 00:09:22,867 | 00:09:27,447 | If I could fly like birds on high | If I could fly like birds on high |
| 29 | 00:09:27,622 | 00:09:32,166 | Then straight to her arms I'd go sailing | Then straight to her arms I'd go sailing |
| 30 | 00:09:33,836 | 00:09:36,459 | It's far | It's far |
| 31 | 00:09:36,631 | 00:09:41,507 | Beyond the stars, It's there beyond the moon | Beyond the stars, It's there beyond the moon |
| 32 | 00:09:43,846 | 00:09:48,887 | I know beyond a doubt | I know beyond a doubt |
| 33 | 00:09:54,732 | 00:09:58,595 | Sit. Down. Bad doggie, down. | Sit. Down. Bad doggie, down. |
| 34 | 00:09:58,700 | 00:10:01,815 | Good doggie! Beg. | Good doggie! Beg. |
| 35 | 00:10:05,910 | 00:10:09,197 | Room service, Mr Tommy. Can I turn down your pants? | Room service, Mr Tommy. Can I turn down your pants? |
| 36 | 00:10:10,248 | 00:10:14,322 | - How's the star of the show? - I'm gonna die. | - How's the star of the show? - I'm gonna die. |
| 37 | 00:10:14,426 | 00:10:18,243 | You're among friends. We won't let you die! | You're among friends. We won't let you die! |
| 38 | 00:10:18,347 | 00:10:21,913 | I don't mean on stage, although I feel like shit. | I don't mean on stage, although I feel like shit. |
| 39 | 00:10:22,018 | 00:10:27,166 | - I mean, I'm gonna die! - What are you talking about? | - I mean, I'm gonna die! - What are you talking about? |
| 40 | 00:10:27,270 | 00:10:32,254 | If I don't do it, make it happen. You know, find that feeling | If I don't do it, make it happen. You know, find that feeling |
| 41 | 00:10:32,358 | 00:10:36,049 | in two weeks, I'm just not gonna live any more. | in two weeks, I'm just not gonna live any more. |
| 42 | 00:10:36,154 | 00:10:38,929 | You mean you feel desperate. | You mean you feel desperate. |
| 43 | 00:10:39,034 | 00:10:45,103 | A lot of people feel desperate before doing something exceptional. | A lot of people feel desperate before doing something exceptional. |
| 44 | 00:10:45,208 | 00:10:50,233 | I'm not playing it safe any more. I'm gonna take it right to the edge. | I'm not playing it safe any more. I'm gonna take it right to the edge. |
| 45 | 00:10:50,338 | 00:10:52,400 | And do pirouettes. | And do pirouettes. |
| 46 | 00:10:52,504 | 00:10:57,116 | - What are you talking about? - Pirouettes, you dumb fuck. | - What are you talking about? - Pirouettes, you dumb fuck. |
| 47 | 00:10:57,221 | 00:10:59,364 | And if I fall, | And if I fall, |
| 48 | 00:10:59,469 | 00:11:05,051 | well, so be it. You know. Who gives a shit? | well, so be it. You know. Who gives a shit? |
| 49 | 00:11:07,763 | 00:11:09,841 | My father in the audience yet? | My father in the audience yet? |
| 50 | 00:11:18,357 | 00:11:22,559 | We're late. That's it, we're late. | We're late. That's it, we're late. |
| 51 | 00:11:22,664 | 00:11:27,151 | - Don't say it was me. - Relax, dear. | - Don't say it was me. - Relax, dear. |
| 52 | 00:11:28,409 | 00:11:31,530 | I'm gonna die. | I'm gonna die. |
| 53 | 00:12:00,816 | 00:12:04,097 | Welcome to the Hilton Vegas, Mr Fawkes! | Welcome to the Hilton Vegas, Mr Fawkes! |
| 54 | 00:12:04,201 | 00:12:07,602 | - Great to see you. - Thank you. | - Great to see you. - Thank you. |
| 55 | 00:12:07,707 | 00:12:13,654 | No matter what happens, nobody can say you're not a great father. | No matter what happens, nobody can say you're not a great father. |
| 56 | 00:12:32,431 | 00:12:33,474 | Hi. | Hi. |
| 57 | 00:12:48,531 | 00:12:51,983 | Now is not the time to lose faith in the material. | Now is not the time to lose faith in the material. |
| 58 | 00:12:52,159 | 00:12:54,319 | It got you this far. | It got you this far. |
| 59 | 00:12:54,495 | 00:13:00,073 | As an opener, the dog story is the best joke I ever wrote for you. | As an opener, the dog story is the best joke I ever wrote for you. |
| 60 | 00:13:00,177 | 00:13:05,367 | But if... which it won't... but if, and I mean only if... | But if... which it won't... but if, and I mean only if... |
| 61 | 00:13:05,472 | 00:13:09,926 | Jesus, you make me doubt things. If it doesn't work, | Jesus, you make me doubt things. If it doesn't work, |
| 62 | 00:13:10,094 | 00:13:12,337 | use the saver. | use the saver. |
| 63 | 00:13:12,513 | 00:13:15,052 | You mean, a joke's like a lady getting out of a car. | You mean, a joke's like a lady getting out of a car. |
| 64 | 00:13:15,224 | 00:13:17,265 | Sometimes you see it, sometimes you don't? | Sometimes you see it, sometimes you don't? |
| 65 | 00:13:17,435 | 00:13:20,353 | - Yeah, that's it! - Yeah, that's it! | - Yeah, that's it! - Yeah, that's it! |
| 66 | 00:13:25,067 | 00:13:30,396 | Tommy, I don't think you should use the sheep story. | Tommy, I don't think you should use the sheep story. |
| 67 | 00:13:30,500 | 00:13:34,314 | - What are you telling me? - It's not that kind of house. | - What are you telling me? - It's not that kind of house. |
| 68 | 00:13:34,418 | 00:13:39,232 | It uses the F word, and this is not the Comedy Store. | It uses the F word, and this is not the Comedy Store. |
| 69 | 00:13:39,337 | 00:13:44,449 | - You'll lose 'em with the F word. - Risks, Al. Pirouettes! | - You'll lose 'em with the F word. - Risks, Al. Pirouettes! |
| 70 | 00:13:44,553 | 00:13:47,037 | A one-way ticket. | A one-way ticket. |
| 71 | 00:13:48,466 | 00:13:51,468 | Two weeks to live. | Two weeks to live. |
| 72 | 00:14:22,792 | 00:14:27,668 | - You're nervous. - I waited all my life for tonight. | - You're nervous. - I waited all my life for tonight. |
| 73 | 00:14:35,221 | 00:14:40,754 | What are you doing, pumpkin? Don't do this, please. | What are you doing, pumpkin? Don't do this, please. |
| 74 | 00:14:40,859 | 00:14:46,928 | You're so cold. You have frozen the life out of me. | You're so cold. You have frozen the life out of me. |
| 75 | 00:14:47,033 | 00:14:50,765 | What is this? What are you doing to me? | What is this? What are you doing to me? |
| 76 | 00:14:50,870 | 00:14:57,227 | You're all that matters. All you think about. Tommy Fawkes! | You're all that matters. All you think about. Tommy Fawkes! |
| 77 | 00:14:57,331 | 00:15:00,447 | Tommy, you're so cold. | Tommy, you're so cold. |
| 78 | 00:15:02,123 | 00:15:06,916 | You wonder why people don't laugh at you? | You wonder why people don't laugh at you? |
| 79 | 00:15:12,466 | 00:15:13,843 | What? | What? |
| 80 | 00:15:15,010 | 00:15:19,334 | What are you saying? What are you saying to me? | What are you saying? What are you saying to me? |
| 81 | 00:15:19,438 | 00:15:24,549 | I am saying that you cannot have relationships. | I am saying that you cannot have relationships. |
| 82 | 00:15:24,653 | 00:15:28,062 | We're through. That's what I'm saying! | We're through. That's what I'm saying! |
| 83 | 00:15:45,583 | 00:15:48,113 | - Hi, son. - Hi, Dad. | - Hi, son. - Hi, Dad. |
| 84 | 00:15:48,218 | 00:15:51,378 | I won't hold you up. | I won't hold you up. |
| 85 | 00:15:51,839 | 00:15:56,881 | Boy, this takes me back. New mirrors. | Boy, this takes me back. New mirrors. |
| 86 | 00:15:58,387 | 00:16:02,302 | All I came to say was, you couldn't ask for a better audience. | All I came to say was, you couldn't ask for a better audience. |
| 87 | 00:16:02,475 | 00:16:05,560 | That room is filled with people. | That room is filled with people. |
| 88 | 00:16:05,728 | 00:16:09,424 | Friends, family, the whole of show business is there! | Friends, family, the whole of show business is there! |
| 89 | 00:16:09,528 | 00:16:15,600 | They're all just hoping and wishing, and ready to laugh, son. | They're all just hoping and wishing, and ready to laugh, son. |
| 90 | 00:16:15,704 | 00:16:18,810 | - I better go. - Sure, OK. | - I better go. - Sure, OK. |
| 91 | 00:16:18,914 | 00:16:23,231 | I just wanted you to know how proud I am of you. | I just wanted you to know how proud I am of you. |
| 92 | 00:16:23,335 | 00:16:26,450 | - Five minutes, please. - He'll be right there. | - Five minutes, please. - He'll be right there. |
| 93 | 00:16:28,584 | 00:16:32,990 | If this audience doesn't laugh, | If this audience doesn't laugh, |
| 94 | 00:16:33,095 | 00:16:35,703 | then I don't know what. | then I don't know what. |
| 95 | 00:16:35,807 | 00:16:40,750 | I just think all those years of playing small venues | I just think all those years of playing small venues |
| 96 | 00:16:40,855 | 00:16:45,586 | and learning the business is about to pay off for you. | and learning the business is about to pay off for you. |
| 97 | 00:16:45,691 | 00:16:51,640 | And I hope so. Because I know you haven't always found life easy. | And I hope so. Because I know you haven't always found life easy. |
| 98 | 00:16:53,275 | 00:16:56,972 | - OK! Dad, I have to go. - OK. | - OK! Dad, I have to go. - OK. |
| 99 | 00:16:57,076 | 00:16:59,307 | Go get 'em. | Go get 'em. |
| 100 | 00:16:59,412 | 00:17:02,325 | Kill the bastards. | Kill the bastards. |
| 101 | 00:17:09,792 | 00:17:14,787 | We will meet beyond the shore | We will meet beyond the shore |
| 102 | 00:17:14,964 | 00:17:18,583 | We'll kiss just as before | We'll kiss just as before |
| 103 | 00:17:19,718 | 00:17:23,254 | Happy we'll be beyond the sea | Happy we'll be beyond the sea |
| 104 | 00:17:24,265 | 00:17:26,139 | And never again | And never again |
| 105 | 00:17:28,269 | 00:17:30,595 | He was fine. | He was fine. |
| 106 | 00:17:30,771 | 00:17:33,310 | I'll go sailing | I'll go sailing |
| 107 | 00:17:33,482 | 00:17:35,916 | Sailing | Sailing |
| 108 | 00:17:51,041 | 00:17:55,326 | Ladies and gentlemen, we have a new face topping the bill | Ladies and gentlemen, we have a new face topping the bill |
| 109 | 00:17:55,430 | 00:17:57,702 | at the Hilton Oasis. | at the Hilton Oasis. |
| 110 | 00:17:57,806 | 00:18:03,332 | A new face. But an old name. The name is Fawkes. | A new face. But an old name. The name is Fawkes. |
| 111 | 00:18:03,436 | 00:18:06,550 | Yeah! Tommy Fawkes! All right! | Yeah! Tommy Fawkes! All right! |
| 112 | 00:18:08,976 | 00:18:14,214 | I'm gonna keep Tommy waiting just a little longer. First of all, | I'm gonna keep Tommy waiting just a little longer. First of all, |
| 113 | 00:18:14,319 | 00:18:17,806 | there's something special we have to do. | there's something special we have to do. |
| 114 | 00:18:17,910 | 00:18:21,431 | Ladies and gentlemen, the biggest star of them all. | Ladies and gentlemen, the biggest star of them all. |
| 115 | 00:18:21,535 | 00:18:26,353 | The funniest. Mr Originality himself, | The funniest. Mr Originality himself, |
| 116 | 00:18:26,457 | 00:18:32,289 | in the audience tonight. Mr George Fawkes! | in the audience tonight. Mr George Fawkes! |
| 117 | 00:18:43,385 | 00:18:47,170 | Come on, George. They want you. | Come on, George. They want you. |
| 118 | 00:18:49,683 | 00:18:53,136 | Don't do it, Dad. Please don't do it. | Don't do it, Dad. Please don't do it. |
| 119 | 00:19:38,190 | 00:19:45,238 | As the cow said on a wintry morning: "Thank you for that warm hand." | As the cow said on a wintry morning: "Thank you for that warm hand." |
| 120 | 00:19:49,326 | 00:19:54,904 | But seriously, folks. I cannot tell you what a joy I feel | But seriously, folks. I cannot tell you what a joy I feel |
| 121 | 00:19:55,008 | 00:19:59,661 | being here at the... Hilton Oasis. | being here at the... Hilton Oasis. |
| 122 | 00:20:00,295 | 00:20:04,164 | He did it. He did it. | He did it. He did it. |
| 123 | 00:20:05,259 | 00:20:09,092 | Mr Fawkes? Are you OK? | Mr Fawkes? Are you OK? |
| 124 | 00:20:12,433 | 00:20:15,138 | I can't believe he did that. Oh, boy. | I can't believe he did that. Oh, boy. |
| 125 | 00:20:20,441 | 00:20:23,277 | A gag is like watching a girl get out of a car. | A gag is like watching a girl get out of a car. |
| 126 | 00:20:23,485 | 00:20:25,693 | Sometimes you see it, sometimes you don't. | Sometimes you see it, sometimes you don't. |
| 127 | 00:20:32,578 | 00:20:35,615 | I'm history, I'm out of here. Have a good night. | I'm history, I'm out of here. Have a good night. |
| 128 | 00:20:44,715 | 00:20:46,792 | You still got it! | You still got it! |
| 129 | 00:20:59,772 | 00:21:01,812 | I can't believe he did that. | I can't believe he did that. |
| 130 | 00:21:01,982 | 00:21:06,526 | And now will you welcome | And now will you welcome |
| 131 | 00:21:06,695 | 00:21:09,982 | the man who has inherited that talent. | the man who has inherited that talent. |
| 132 | 00:21:10,157 | 00:21:13,693 | Mr Tommy Fawkes! | Mr Tommy Fawkes! |
| 133 | 00:21:37,935 | 00:21:39,845 | He's great! | He's great! |
| 134 | 00:21:54,576 | 00:21:57,151 | Slay 'em, Tommy! | Slay 'em, Tommy! |
| 135 | 00:22:00,541 | 00:22:03,110 | My wonderful parents, ladies and gentlemen. | My wonderful parents, ladies and gentlemen. |
| 136 | 00:22:03,214 | 00:22:09,830 | They hated me. They once took me to an orphanage and told me to mingle. | They hated me. They once took me to an orphanage and told me to mingle. |
| 137 | 00:22:11,218 | 00:22:14,248 | Do you ever feel like killing yourself? | Do you ever feel like killing yourself? |
| 138 | 00:22:14,352 | 00:22:19,713 | Like no matter what you do, people will always see you as one thing? | Like no matter what you do, people will always see you as one thing? |
| 139 | 00:22:19,817 | 00:22:23,144 | It's like a lifetime of bad luck. | It's like a lifetime of bad luck. |
| 140 | 00:22:25,232 | 00:22:31,764 | I came home last week, my dog looked sheepish. Dogs can look sheepish! | I came home last week, my dog looked sheepish. Dogs can look sheepish! |
| 141 | 00:22:31,869 | 00:22:35,727 | I feed him, he won't eat. He starts wailing real loud. | I feed him, he won't eat. He starts wailing real loud. |
| 142 | 00:22:35,831 | 00:22:39,945 | I go into the back room, I see he's broken a very large mirror. | I go into the back room, I see he's broken a very large mirror. |
| 143 | 00:22:40,049 | 00:22:44,612 | I say, "Did you do this?" He said, "Yeah." He did. | I say, "Did you do this?" He said, "Yeah." He did. |
| 144 | 00:22:44,716 | 00:22:46,703 | "It's OK, why are you so upset?" | "It's OK, why are you so upset?" |
| 145 | 00:22:46,879 | 00:22:49,715 | He says, "49 years bad luck." | He says, "49 years bad luck." |
| 146 | 00:23:02,477 | 00:23:04,637 | A joke's like watching a lady get out of a car | A joke's like watching a lady get out of a car |
| 147 | 00:23:04,813 | 00:23:07,222 | Sometimes you see it, sometimes you don't. | Sometimes you see it, sometimes you don't. |
| 148 | 00:23:21,204 | 00:23:24,123 | Did I say something funny? | Did I say something funny? |
| 149 | 00:23:26,752 | 00:23:30,243 | I was playing Carthage, Tennessee. Ever play there? | I was playing Carthage, Tennessee. Ever play there? |
| 150 | 00:23:30,347 | 00:23:35,328 | They brought back the death penalty for comedians only. | They brought back the death penalty for comedians only. |
| 151 | 00:23:35,432 | 00:23:40,583 | Guy in a bar says, "I used to own this place. I built it up from nothing. | Guy in a bar says, "I used to own this place. I built it up from nothing. |
| 152 | 00:23:40,688 | 00:23:44,212 | "But do they call me John the Bar Owner? No. | "But do they call me John the Bar Owner? No. |
| 153 | 00:23:44,316 | 00:23:48,257 | "I owned the biggest farm in the county for 30 years. | "I owned the biggest farm in the county for 30 years. |
| 154 | 00:23:48,361 | 00:23:53,399 | "I looked after animals, crops. But do they call me John the Farmer? | "I looked after animals, crops. But do they call me John the Farmer? |
| 155 | 00:23:55,489 | 00:24:00,606 | "I ran for Congress. Sat in Washington representing the people. | "I ran for Congress. Sat in Washington representing the people. |
| 156 | 00:24:00,711 | 00:24:04,286 | "They call me John the Congressman? No, sir. | "They call me John the Congressman? No, sir. |
| 157 | 00:24:04,456 | 00:24:07,328 | "You fuck one sheep..." | "You fuck one sheep..." |
| 158 | 00:24:42,619 | 00:24:46,654 | I gotta run. You made a lousy fucking audience. | I gotta run. You made a lousy fucking audience. |
| 159 | 00:24:46,759 | 00:24:51,874 | My name is Tommy Fawkes, and I got two weeks to live. | My name is Tommy Fawkes, and I got two weeks to live. |
| 160 | 00:25:01,638 | 00:25:03,715 | Tommy? | Tommy? |
| 161 | 00:25:29,875 | 00:25:33,873 | Well, my mama she didn't love me | Well, my mama she didn't love me |
| 162 | 00:25:34,046 | 00:25:37,297 | She had to stay out all night long O Lord | She had to stay out all night long O Lord |
| 163 | 00:25:45,390 | 00:25:48,558 | Well, my mama didn't love me | Well, my mama didn't love me |
| 164 | 00:25:48,727 | 00:25:51,729 | She had to stay out all night long | She had to stay out all night long |
| 165 | 00:25:58,487 | 00:26:03,648 | I didn't care if she didn't love I would boogie-woogie anyhow | I didn't care if she didn't love I would boogie-woogie anyhow |
| 166 | 00:26:14,544 | 00:26:17,630 | When I was working up in town, people | When I was working up in town, people |
| 167 | 00:26:17,798 | 00:26:21,250 | I was walking down Hatham Street | I was walking down Hatham Street |
| 168 | 00:26:22,511 | 00:26:27,138 | I heard everybody talking about it The Henry Swain Club | I heard everybody talking about it The Henry Swain Club |
| 169 | 00:26:28,850 | 00:26:33,976 | I decided I'd drop in that night and when I got there | I decided I'd drop in that night and when I got there |
| 170 | 00:26:34,147 | 00:26:38,526 | I say, yes, people you do really have a ball | I say, yes, people you do really have a ball |
| 171 | 00:26:38,693 | 00:26:41,814 | Come on. Get it off him. | Come on. Get it off him. |
| 172 | 00:26:47,410 | 00:26:48,954 | Get it off him! | Get it off him! |
| 173 | 00:27:03,301 | 00:27:08,545 | We'll send somebody to find your father and your uncle. | We'll send somebody to find your father and your uncle. |
| 174 | 00:27:09,891 | 00:27:13,588 | Is there anything else you want? | Is there anything else you want? |
| 175 | 00:27:13,692 | 00:27:16,309 | Anything we can bring you? | Anything we can bring you? |
| 176 | 00:27:18,775 | 00:27:20,187 | Toast! | Toast! |
| 177 | 00:27:21,945 | 00:27:23,903 | Toast. | Toast. |
| 178 | 00:27:33,498 | 00:27:35,871 | Over here! | Over here! |
| 179 | 00:27:43,133 | 00:27:46,254 | Here! Over here! | Here! Over here! |
| 180 | 00:28:00,609 | 00:28:02,347 | Here! | Here! |
| 181 | 00:28:26,718 | 00:28:30,543 | Look, it's nothing. It's just a foot. | Look, it's nothing. It's just a foot. |
| 182 | 00:28:30,647 | 00:28:34,388 | It'll blow over. It's a one-off. | It'll blow over. It's a one-off. |
| 183 | 00:28:34,559 | 00:28:35,950 | Yes. | Yes. |
| 184 | 00:28:38,355 | 00:28:39,397 | No. | No. |
| 185 | 00:28:40,690 | 00:28:45,308 | I will, I will. | I will, I will. |
| 186 | 00:28:45,413 | 00:28:49,070 | I resent that. Piss off! | I resent that. Piss off! |
| 187 | 00:28:55,288 | 00:28:56,821 | Animals. | Animals. |
| 188 | 00:28:56,925 | 00:28:58,955 | Did you tell them there's no connection | Did you tell them there's no connection |
| 189 | 00:28:59,125 | 00:29:01,452 | between the foot and the man in the tower? | between the foot and the man in the tower? |
| 190 | 00:29:38,623 | 00:29:42,207 | Jack Parker's father? | Jack Parker's father? |
| 191 | 00:29:44,963 | 00:29:48,076 | I am. That's his uncle. | I am. That's his uncle. |
| 192 | 00:29:48,181 | 00:29:53,383 | I'm afraid he's climbed the tower and he won't come down. | I'm afraid he's climbed the tower and he won't come down. |
| 193 | 00:29:56,933 | 00:29:59,425 | He's asked for toast. | He's asked for toast. |
| 194 | 00:30:01,062 | 00:30:05,809 | Do you know why? I mean, toast? | Do you know why? I mean, toast? |
| 195 | 00:30:07,152 | 00:30:10,189 | Toast, shut up. | Toast, shut up. |
| 196 | 00:30:22,417 | 00:30:25,538 | May I ask you what you do? | May I ask you what you do? |
| 197 | 00:30:27,213 | 00:30:29,966 | How do you mean? | How do you mean? |
| 198 | 00:31:31,820 | 00:31:33,694 | Come on, Mother. | Come on, Mother. |
| 199 | 00:32:01,307 | 00:32:06,175 | You're from the lawyers? Broadbent, Phelps, Burger & Burger? | You're from the lawyers? Broadbent, Phelps, Burger & Burger? |
| 200 | 00:32:06,279 | 00:32:11,638 | Berger & Berger... I'm Lawrence Berger. You're Mr Tarascas? | Berger & Berger... I'm Lawrence Berger. You're Mr Tarascas? |
| 201 | 00:32:11,742 | 00:32:15,347 | - Dick Tarascas. Dick. - Shall we wait for your bags? | - Dick Tarascas. Dick. - Shall we wait for your bags? |
| 202 | 00:32:15,452 | 00:32:18,854 | - My bags went to Düsseldorf. - Oh, really? | - My bags went to Düsseldorf. - Oh, really? |
| 203 | 00:32:18,958 | 00:32:22,450 | Gosh. That's unbelievably bad luck. | Gosh. That's unbelievably bad luck. |
| 204 | 00:32:27,625 | 00:32:31,956 | - My cheque's come? Hotel confirmed? - Yes, indeed. Sea view. | - My cheque's come? Hotel confirmed? - Yes, indeed. Sea view. |
| 205 | 00:32:32,130 | 00:32:33,922 | Let's go. | Let's go. |
| 206 | 00:32:44,809 | 00:32:50,009 | - Is this your first time here? - No, I lived here till I was six. | - Is this your first time here? - No, I lived here till I was six. |
| 207 | 00:32:50,113 | 00:32:57,265 | So you've noticed the changes, then. What would it be? 30 years? | So you've noticed the changes, then. What would it be? 30 years? |
| 208 | 00:32:57,370 | 00:33:03,691 | Its heyday. Marlene Dietrich, Sammy Davis Jr., Frank Sinatra. | Its heyday. Marlene Dietrich, Sammy Davis Jr., Frank Sinatra. |
| 209 | 00:33:03,795 | 00:33:08,737 | A mecca for comedians, of course. Bob Hope. | A mecca for comedians, of course. Bob Hope. |
| 210 | 00:33:08,842 | 00:33:12,535 | George Formby. George Fawkes. | George Formby. George Fawkes. |
| 211 | 00:33:13,421 | 00:33:17,040 | And the sun shone every day, right? | And the sun shone every day, right? |
| 212 | 00:33:18,051 | 00:33:21,136 | It seemed to, yes. | It seemed to, yes. |
| 213 | 00:34:22,407 | 00:34:25,990 | Mr Parker? Steve Campbell. I'm a psychiatrist. | Mr Parker? Steve Campbell. I'm a psychiatrist. |
| 214 | 00:34:26,160 | 00:34:28,358 | Is he coming down? | Is he coming down? |
| 215 | 00:34:28,463 | 00:34:33,322 | Why wasn't I told it's Jack Parker? What about guns? | Why wasn't I told it's Jack Parker? What about guns? |
| 216 | 00:34:33,426 | 00:34:39,623 | - He isn't armed. - With respect, he is a known maniac. | - He isn't armed. - With respect, he is a known maniac. |
| 217 | 00:34:43,469 | 00:34:47,219 | Hiya, Dad. Hi, Uncle Thomas. | Hiya, Dad. Hi, Uncle Thomas. |
| 218 | 00:34:47,974 | 00:34:50,596 | Are you all right? | Are you all right? |
| 219 | 00:34:51,728 | 00:34:54,054 | I'm gonna die! | I'm gonna die! |
| 220 | 00:34:54,647 | 00:34:58,427 | Gentlemen, what I need to know is, | Gentlemen, what I need to know is, |
| 221 | 00:34:58,531 | 00:35:04,067 | how far does this man go when he's pushed? | how far does this man go when he's pushed? |
| 222 | 00:36:11,849 | 00:36:15,674 | - You must be Mrs Parker. - I was married to Bruno. | - You must be Mrs Parker. - I was married to Bruno. |
| 223 | 00:36:15,778 | 00:36:20,812 | But I'm no longer Mrs Parker. This is Toast. | But I'm no longer Mrs Parker. This is Toast. |
| 224 | 00:36:24,529 | 00:36:29,607 | Jack, my darling. You can come down now. | Jack, my darling. You can come down now. |
| 225 | 00:36:40,169 | 00:36:42,489 | Mr Parker. | Mr Parker. |
| 226 | 00:36:42,594 | 00:36:47,578 | Your brother doesn't seem to speak. Is that right? | Your brother doesn't seem to speak. Is that right? |
| 227 | 00:36:47,682 | 00:36:52,666 | - He's depressed. - How long has he been depressed? | - He's depressed. - How long has he been depressed? |
| 228 | 00:36:52,770 | 00:36:57,393 | - When did he last speak? - Twelve years ago. | - When did he last speak? - Twelve years ago. |
| 229 | 00:37:13,161 | 00:37:18,536 | I gather you're in the business yourself. A comedian? | I gather you're in the business yourself. A comedian? |
| 230 | 00:37:18,708 | 00:37:20,333 | Sort of. | Sort of. |
| 231 | 00:37:20,501 | 00:37:26,284 | And you're prepared to pay money to see comedy material in Blackpool? | And you're prepared to pay money to see comedy material in Blackpool? |
| 232 | 00:37:26,388 | 00:37:29,624 | - You bet. - Actual cash? | - You bet. - Actual cash? |
| 233 | 00:37:29,728 | 00:37:33,504 | Bingo. I'm serious. Everything I see, I pay to see. | Bingo. I'm serious. Everything I see, I pay to see. |
| 234 | 00:37:33,681 | 00:37:37,294 | £50 for a look. If I buy, that's where you step in. | £50 for a look. If I buy, that's where you step in. |
| 235 | 00:37:37,398 | 00:37:41,716 | I never thought of it as such a competitive business. | I never thought of it as such a competitive business. |
| 236 | 00:37:41,821 | 00:37:44,096 | Well, it is. | Well, it is. |
| 237 | 00:37:44,200 | 00:37:49,558 | - What do you want to see? - Whatever's funny in Blackpool. | - What do you want to see? - Whatever's funny in Blackpool. |
| 238 | 00:37:49,663 | 00:37:54,312 | Old routines, funny routines, funny people. | Old routines, funny routines, funny people. |
| 239 | 00:37:54,416 | 00:37:57,108 | - Jokes? - No jokes. | - Jokes? - No jokes. |
| 240 | 00:37:57,212 | 00:38:02,405 | I'm looking for another way. Jokes I've paid for. It doesn't work. | I'm looking for another way. Jokes I've paid for. It doesn't work. |
| 241 | 00:38:02,509 | 00:38:04,791 | No jokes. | No jokes. |
| 242 | 00:38:06,089 | 00:38:10,383 | Funny people. Physical comedy. Original ideas. | Funny people. Physical comedy. Original ideas. |
| 243 | 00:38:10,551 | 00:38:13,793 | Visual? Slapstick? | Visual? Slapstick? |
| 244 | 00:38:13,897 | 00:38:18,506 | - It may not be scripted. - Doesn't mean I can't buy it. | - It may not be scripted. - Doesn't mean I can't buy it. |
| 245 | 00:38:18,610 | 00:38:22,803 | Look, Lawrence. I'm gonna be frank. | Look, Lawrence. I'm gonna be frank. |
| 246 | 00:38:22,907 | 00:38:28,097 | I don't have long to live. I'm looking for something. I don't know what. | I don't have long to live. I'm looking for something. I don't know what. |
| 247 | 00:38:28,201 | 00:38:32,396 | I'm an educated man, I like to analyze. I'm reasonably wealthy. | I'm an educated man, I like to analyze. I'm reasonably wealthy. |
| 248 | 00:38:32,500 | 00:38:35,776 | It's something special. I'm gonna find it here. | It's something special. I'm gonna find it here. |
| 249 | 00:38:35,952 | 00:38:38,649 | Whoever brings it might not even know its worth. | Whoever brings it might not even know its worth. |
| 250 | 00:38:38,753 | 00:38:43,281 | Whatever it is, it will be something I don't have. | Whatever it is, it will be something I don't have. |
| 251 | 00:38:43,385 | 00:38:50,119 | Another way of looking at life. I spent six years of my life here. | Another way of looking at life. I spent six years of my life here. |
| 252 | 00:38:50,223 | 00:38:53,996 | There's no reason why the sun can't shine again. | There's no reason why the sun can't shine again. |
| 253 | 00:38:54,100 | 00:39:00,633 | I mean, why do all the best things in life belong to the past? | I mean, why do all the best things in life belong to the past? |
| 254 | 00:39:01,227 | 00:39:03,924 | I don't know. | I don't know. |
| 255 | 00:39:04,029 | 00:39:07,180 | But it's true. You're right. | But it's true. You're right. |
| 256 | 00:39:07,284 | 00:39:13,269 | So no jokes, OK? Jokes I'll leave to George Fawkes. | So no jokes, OK? Jokes I'll leave to George Fawkes. |
| 257 | 00:39:13,373 | 00:39:18,647 | - George Fawkes. He was funny. - Still is. | - George Fawkes. He was funny. - Still is. |
| 258 | 00:39:18,752 | 00:39:22,695 | Surely not? I thought he died in Las Vegas. | Surely not? I thought he died in Las Vegas. |
| 259 | 00:39:23,374 | 00:39:27,669 | No. I died in Las Vegas. | No. I died in Las Vegas. |
| 260 | 00:40:20,890 | 00:40:25,138 | Jack, I'm here to help you. I'm going to ask you a few questions. | Jack, I'm here to help you. I'm going to ask you a few questions. |
| 261 | 00:40:25,311 | 00:40:27,684 | Unrelated, all right? | Unrelated, all right? |
| 262 | 00:40:29,190 | 00:40:32,719 | - Where were you born? - Blackpool. | - Where were you born? - Blackpool. |
| 263 | 00:40:32,824 | 00:40:38,027 | - Why Blackpool? - I wanted to be near me mother. | - Why Blackpool? - I wanted to be near me mother. |
| 264 | 00:40:40,284 | 00:40:45,623 | - Have you lived here all your life? - Not yet. | - Have you lived here all your life? - Not yet. |
| 265 | 00:40:48,000 | 00:40:53,755 | They tell me you had no real education. Is that right? | They tell me you had no real education. Is that right? |
| 266 | 00:40:58,177 | 00:41:01,873 | Tell me, of this list, | Tell me, of this list, |
| 267 | 00:41:01,978 | 00:41:05,586 | which is the odd one out? | which is the odd one out? |
| 268 | 00:41:05,690 | 00:41:07,755 | House. | House. |
| 269 | 00:41:07,860 | 00:41:12,031 | School. Dog. | School. Dog. |
| 270 | 00:41:12,281 | 00:41:15,276 | Cinema. Church. | Cinema. Church. |
| 271 | 00:41:16,779 | 00:41:19,271 | - Dog. - Good. | - Dog. - Good. |
| 272 | 00:41:19,949 | 00:41:23,283 | A dog wouldn't go to the cinema, would it? | A dog wouldn't go to the cinema, would it? |
| 273 | 00:41:26,580 | 00:41:29,694 | Which of these is the odd one out? | Which of these is the odd one out? |
| 274 | 00:41:29,798 | 00:41:33,743 | Malice. Jealousy. | Malice. Jealousy. |
| 275 | 00:41:35,214 | 00:41:37,299 | Greed. | Greed. |
| 276 | 00:41:37,638 | 00:41:39,377 | Envy. | Envy. |
| 277 | 00:41:40,224 | 00:41:43,755 | And... kindness. | And... kindness. |
| 278 | 00:41:47,810 | 00:41:49,201 | And. | And. |
| 279 | 00:42:35,274 | 00:42:39,771 | - I want to tell the whole truth. - Very well. | - I want to tell the whole truth. - Very well. |
| 280 | 00:42:39,945 | 00:42:42,402 | I'll fetch the sergeant. | I'll fetch the sergeant. |
| 281 | 00:42:52,333 | 00:42:55,613 | Jack, this is Detective Sergeant Sharkey. | Jack, this is Detective Sergeant Sharkey. |
| 282 | 00:42:55,717 | 00:42:59,792 | What is it you want to say? | What is it you want to say? |
| 283 | 00:43:00,549 | 00:43:02,093 | Jack? | Jack? |
| 284 | 00:43:04,887 | 00:43:06,625 | Jack? | Jack? |
| 285 | 00:43:06,972 | 00:43:11,885 | Man, slow down | Man, slow down |
| 286 | 00:43:13,854 | 00:43:16,524 | We'll get there | We'll get there |
| 287 | 00:43:20,361 | 00:43:23,114 | Take your time | Take your time |
| 288 | 00:43:26,784 | 00:43:30,617 | So we'll just keep on walking anyway | So we'll just keep on walking anyway |
| 289 | 00:43:34,208 | 00:43:36,782 | We have for you the one and only, | We have for you the one and only, |
| 290 | 00:43:36,961 | 00:43:40,627 | the challenger, Dancing Joe Caccelli. | the challenger, Dancing Joe Caccelli. |
| 291 | 00:43:41,632 | 00:43:45,631 | In the red corner, the WBA Champion, | In the red corner, the WBA Champion, |
| 292 | 00:43:45,803 | 00:43:48,674 | Buffalo Bob Johnson. | Buffalo Bob Johnson. |
| 293 | 00:43:50,182 | 00:43:54,513 | Boxers, let's get ready to rumble. | Boxers, let's get ready to rumble. |
| 294 | 00:44:01,902 | 00:44:04,229 | Oh, well, that's Turkey. | Oh, well, that's Turkey. |
| 295 | 00:44:11,745 | 00:44:16,243 | Tune into your breathing pattern and watch the breathing. | Tune into your breathing pattern and watch the breathing. |
| 296 | 00:44:16,417 | 00:44:20,285 | Breathing naturally, not forcing it in any way. | Breathing naturally, not forcing it in any way. |
| 297 | 00:44:22,506 | 00:44:26,172 | As you breathe, begin to hear yourself. | As you breathe, begin to hear yourself. |
| 298 | 00:44:27,845 | 00:44:31,345 | Min-nnaaah! | Min-nnaaah! |
| 299 | 00:44:34,768 | 00:44:42,813 | Ooooh-waa-haa-haa. Ooooh-waa-haa-haa. | Ooooh-waa-haa-haa. Ooooh-waa-haa-haa. |
| 300 | 00:44:44,445 | 00:44:49,440 | Remember, breathe to your breathing rhythm. | Remember, breathe to your breathing rhythm. |
| 301 | 00:44:58,083 | 00:45:03,838 | When we breathe out, there's a natural pause at the end. | When we breathe out, there's a natural pause at the end. |
| 302 | 00:45:07,051 | 00:45:11,512 | Before we breathe in again, try to feel the pause. | Before we breathe in again, try to feel the pause. |
| 303 | 00:45:15,392 | 00:45:19,177 | Just let go until you breathe in again. | Just let go until you breathe in again. |
| 304 | 00:45:19,939 | 00:45:22,265 | In your own breathing rhythm, | In your own breathing rhythm, |
| 305 | 00:45:22,441 | 00:45:26,274 | breathe in naturally, and out slowly. | breathe in naturally, and out slowly. |
| 306 | 00:45:26,445 | 00:45:31,357 | Pause at the end of the breath. Feel your eyelids becoming heavy. | Pause at the end of the breath. Feel your eyelids becoming heavy. |
| 307 | 00:45:44,380 | 00:45:47,538 | They tried to pull a stroke, Dolly. There was an accident. | They tried to pull a stroke, Dolly. There was an accident. |
| 308 | 00:45:47,642 | 00:45:51,790 | I know he died in a bad way, but it serves the filthy frog right. | I know he died in a bad way, but it serves the filthy frog right. |
| 309 | 00:45:51,894 | 00:45:54,640 | He only brought five eggs. | He only brought five eggs. |
| 310 | 00:45:55,683 | 00:46:00,173 | - But you gave him all the money. - We had no choice. | - But you gave him all the money. - We had no choice. |
| 311 | 00:46:00,277 | 00:46:06,847 | He threw Jack in the water. We tried to save him, not argue about the egg. | He threw Jack in the water. We tried to save him, not argue about the egg. |
| 312 | 00:46:06,951 | 00:46:13,030 | There was a panic, a communication problem. There's no trust any more. | There was a panic, a communication problem. There's no trust any more. |
| 313 | 00:46:13,659 | 00:46:19,330 | One wax egg remains unaccounted for. | One wax egg remains unaccounted for. |
| 314 | 00:46:19,915 | 00:46:26,583 | Two ounces of the emperor's private store of the plant of immortality. | Two ounces of the emperor's private store of the plant of immortality. |
| 315 | 00:46:27,131 | 00:46:34,130 | That's about £20,000 worth. Or ten more years of my life. | That's about £20,000 worth. Or ten more years of my life. |
| 316 | 00:46:34,555 | 00:46:40,594 | You have my word. The egg went down with that French fella. | You have my word. The egg went down with that French fella. |
| 317 | 00:47:05,002 | 00:47:09,581 | I thought you said this was a one-off. | I thought you said this was a one-off. |
| 318 | 00:47:10,257 | 00:47:13,121 | Well, it is a one-off. | Well, it is a one-off. |
| 319 | 00:47:13,226 | 00:47:18,178 | The feet match. One person. | The feet match. One person. |
| 320 | 00:47:19,433 | 00:47:22,186 | Two feet, though. | Two feet, though. |
| 321 | 00:47:23,771 | 00:47:27,354 | Well, obviously. | Well, obviously. |
| 322 | 00:47:28,275 | 00:47:30,981 | Everyone's got two feet. | Everyone's got two feet. |
| 323 | 00:47:31,945 | 00:47:35,896 | Does anybody know anyone that hasn't got two feet? | Does anybody know anyone that hasn't got two feet? |
| 324 | 00:47:36,700 | 00:47:38,091 | Yes! | Yes! |
| 325 | 00:47:39,125 | 00:47:45,538 | Very amusing, but if you'll excuse me, I've got vermin at South Shore. | Very amusing, but if you'll excuse me, I've got vermin at South Shore. |
| 326 | 00:47:49,838 | 00:47:52,544 | Whose feet are they? | Whose feet are they? |
| 327 | 00:48:07,856 | 00:48:10,942 | One minute to ten. | One minute to ten. |
| 328 | 00:48:33,924 | 00:48:38,172 | Ladies and gentlemen. Come up gently. | Ladies and gentlemen. Come up gently. |
| 329 | 00:49:00,409 | 00:49:05,149 | Are you taking us and our material to the United States? | Are you taking us and our material to the United States? |
| 330 | 00:49:05,253 | 00:49:10,752 | If you want to, we have to go on the QE2. We never fly. | If you want to, we have to go on the QE2. We never fly. |
| 331 | 00:49:18,010 | 00:49:22,212 | Will you all settle down? Quiet! | Will you all settle down? Quiet! |
| 332 | 00:49:22,316 | 00:49:28,716 | - I only eat brown bread. - Sign it before you come through. | - I only eat brown bread. - Sign it before you come through. |
| 333 | 00:49:28,821 | 00:49:34,723 | The terms are the same for all of you. It's £50 for a look. | The terms are the same for all of you. It's £50 for a look. |
| 334 | 00:49:34,828 | 00:49:38,769 | If Mr Tarascas wants to go any further, | If Mr Tarascas wants to go any further, |
| 335 | 00:49:38,947 | 00:49:42,732 | a price will be negotiated. All right? | a price will be negotiated. All right? |
| 336 | 00:50:02,763 | 00:50:05,800 | Good turnout. | Good turnout. |
| 337 | 00:50:06,892 | 00:50:10,807 | Good work, Larry. Let's have the first one. | Good work, Larry. Let's have the first one. |
| 338 | 00:50:21,448 | 00:50:26,028 | This is Steve. He's come all the way from Ormskirk. | This is Steve. He's come all the way from Ormskirk. |
| 339 | 00:50:27,996 | 00:50:31,413 | Welcome, Steve. What do you have to show me? | Welcome, Steve. What do you have to show me? |
| 340 | 00:51:30,225 | 00:51:33,927 | That's what I say I say yeah, yeah | That's what I say I say yeah, yeah |
| 341 | 00:51:34,104 | 00:51:36,773 | That's what I say, I say... | That's what I say, I say... |
| 342 | 00:51:39,985 | 00:51:42,442 | That's what I say, I say... | That's what I say, I say... |
| 343 | 00:51:45,115 | 00:51:47,689 | That's what I say, I say... | That's what I say, I say... |
| 344 | 00:51:58,420 | 00:52:00,701 | - Bonanza. - Aznanob. | - Bonanza. - Aznanob. |
| 345 | 00:52:00,806 | 00:52:03,835 | - Dallas. - Sallad. | - Dallas. - Sallad. |
| 346 | 00:52:24,488 | 00:52:27,609 | Stop doing that! | Stop doing that! |
| 347 | 00:53:13,495 | 00:53:19,112 | - That's funny. - Thank you. Why didn't you laugh? | - That's funny. - Thank you. Why didn't you laugh? |
| 348 | 00:53:19,216 | 00:53:24,786 | Larry will check out the patents on biscuit tin tap dancing. | Larry will check out the patents on biscuit tin tap dancing. |
| 349 | 00:53:24,891 | 00:53:28,832 | - We might make you an offer. - Thank you. | - We might make you an offer. - Thank you. |
| 350 | 00:53:29,511 | 00:53:34,637 | - Don't forget your biscuit tins. - I got plenty of them. | - Don't forget your biscuit tins. - I got plenty of them. |
| 351 | 00:53:52,284 | 00:53:53,675 | I... | I... |
| 352 | 00:53:54,828 | 00:53:59,401 | - What's this? - It was in the "Times" yesterday. | - What's this? - It was in the "Times" yesterday. |
| 353 | 00:53:59,506 | 00:54:04,322 | I doubt many people saw it. Certainly not this lot. | I doubt many people saw it. Certainly not this lot. |
| 354 | 00:54:04,426 | 00:54:08,578 | So as far as Blackpool is concerned, you're still Dick Tarascas. | So as far as Blackpool is concerned, you're still Dick Tarascas. |
| 355 | 00:54:08,682 | 00:54:12,288 | "Legendary comedian George Fawkes won a standing ovation | "Legendary comedian George Fawkes won a standing ovation |
| 356 | 00:54:12,392 | 00:54:19,341 | "when he took over from his vanished son Tommy, also a comedian. | "when he took over from his vanished son Tommy, also a comedian. |
| 357 | 00:54:19,445 | 00:54:24,674 | "The whereabouts of Tommy Fawkes is yet to be established. Police... | "The whereabouts of Tommy Fawkes is yet to be established. Police... |
| 358 | 00:54:24,779 | 00:54:27,101 | "say..." | "say..." |
| 359 | 00:54:41,708 | 00:54:45,837 | - That must have been awful for you. - Yeah. | - That must have been awful for you. - Yeah. |
| 360 | 00:54:48,006 | 00:54:53,084 | - You must admire your father. - He's a hell of a guy. | - You must admire your father. - He's a hell of a guy. |
| 361 | 00:54:54,638 | 00:54:56,762 | So, who's next? | So, who's next? |
| 362 | 00:57:46,810 | 00:57:50,310 | I know you will be good today. | I know you will be good today. |
| 363 | 00:57:50,480 | 00:57:52,474 | And no one knows who you are. | And no one knows who you are. |
| 364 | 00:57:55,151 | 00:57:58,023 | Now I must get ready. | Now I must get ready. |
| 365 | 00:58:02,200 | 00:58:06,993 | Remember clapping for yourself just like your father? | Remember clapping for yourself just like your father? |
| 366 | 00:58:26,349 | 00:58:29,268 | More research, is it? | More research, is it? |
| 367 | 00:58:29,978 | 00:58:34,059 | People in this town will be angry when they find out what you're doing. | People in this town will be angry when they find out what you're doing. |
| 368 | 00:58:35,233 | 00:58:37,304 | Meaning? | Meaning? |
| 369 | 00:58:37,408 | 00:58:42,391 | £50 for a look could become a keep, and we'd never know. | £50 for a look could become a keep, and we'd never know. |
| 370 | 00:58:42,496 | 00:58:44,484 | You haven't seen the right people. | You haven't seen the right people. |
| 371 | 00:58:44,659 | 00:58:48,872 | The ones I'm talking about turned down the Ed Sullivan Show. | The ones I'm talking about turned down the Ed Sullivan Show. |
| 372 | 00:58:50,248 | 00:58:54,866 | I paid to get in here, I'm allowed to watch, Mr... | I paid to get in here, I'm allowed to watch, Mr... |
| 373 | 00:58:54,971 | 00:59:00,079 | This afternoon's new talent is keeping a bit schtumm about his act. | This afternoon's new talent is keeping a bit schtumm about his act. |
| 374 | 00:59:00,183 | 00:59:04,802 | Welcome, please, the amazing Valve Radio. | Welcome, please, the amazing Valve Radio. |
| 375 | 00:59:08,099 | 00:59:11,101 | Mann, Billy Mann. | Mann, Billy Mann. |
| 376 | 00:59:15,732 | 00:59:18,141 | And that is not new talent. | And that is not new talent. |
| 377 | 00:59:36,753 | 00:59:39,838 | The fight is on. Dancing Joe saying, "Come on." | The fight is on. Dancing Joe saying, "Come on." |
| 378 | 00:59:39,964 | 00:59:43,093 | Why, you! | Why, you! |
| 379 | 00:59:44,260 | 00:59:48,010 | The Buffalo's fierce and attempts to psyche out Joe. | The Buffalo's fierce and attempts to psyche out Joe. |
| 380 | 00:59:48,181 | 00:59:50,969 | I put a spell on you | I put a spell on you |
| 381 | 00:59:55,313 | 00:59:57,384 | 'Cause you're mine | 'Cause you're mine |
| 382 | 00:59:57,488 | 01:00:01,850 | Feel your eyelids becoming very heavy. | Feel your eyelids becoming very heavy. |
| 383 | 01:00:01,954 | 01:00:06,851 | I don't wanna feel this way. This is not the way I'm gonna live my life. | I don't wanna feel this way. This is not the way I'm gonna live my life. |
| 384 | 01:00:06,955 | 01:00:12,538 | - The Dancer explodes. - You can feel a strong vibration. | - The Dancer explodes. - You can feel a strong vibration. |
| 385 | 01:00:23,299 | 01:00:25,997 | Anybody in this room who can't do that? | Anybody in this room who can't do that? |
| 386 | 01:00:26,101 | 01:00:30,584 | Buffalo lands a hook, a right, an uppercut. Exploding into Dancer! | Buffalo lands a hook, a right, an uppercut. Exploding into Dancer! |
| 387 | 01:00:30,688 | 01:00:33,849 | Having a great smile really can change your life. | Having a great smile really can change your life. |
| 388 | 01:00:34,144 | 01:00:37,840 | A left. A left again. Joe is stumbling. | A left. A left again. Joe is stumbling. |
| 389 | 01:00:37,944 | 01:00:40,847 | Must be jelly Jam don't shake like that | Must be jelly Jam don't shake like that |
| 390 | 01:00:40,951 | 01:00:46,937 | - Drop your hand by your sides. - He's unguarded. Buffalo strikes! | - Drop your hand by your sides. - He's unguarded. Buffalo strikes! |
| 391 | 01:00:47,041 | 01:00:50,938 | - What? Where? When? How? Who? - He goes down three times. | - What? Where? When? How? Who? - He goes down three times. |
| 392 | 01:00:51,043 | 01:00:54,655 | Expel every drop of air from your body. | Expel every drop of air from your body. |
| 393 | 01:00:55,748 | 01:00:59,361 | Buffalo is held back while Joe's on the floor. | Buffalo is held back while Joe's on the floor. |
| 394 | 01:00:59,466 | 01:01:02,369 | I'm not a beast. | I'm not a beast. |
| 395 | 01:01:02,473 | 01:01:07,453 | - He's given the count. - 90! Who'll go to 94? | - He's given the count. - 90! Who'll go to 94? |
| 396 | 01:01:07,557 | 01:01:10,121 | - Fill your body... - He's up. | - Fill your body... - He's up. |
| 397 | 01:01:10,225 | 01:01:12,790 | .. and let it out. | .. and let it out. |
| 398 | 01:01:12,895 | 01:01:15,633 | He's down again. Chip is counting. | He's down again. Chip is counting. |
| 399 | 01:01:15,737 | 01:01:19,634 | It's been requested that I do this number for you. | It's been requested that I do this number for you. |
| 400 | 01:01:19,738 | 01:01:22,300 | In. Out. | In. Out. |
| 401 | 01:01:22,404 | 01:01:24,773 | In. Out. | In. Out. |
| 402 | 01:01:24,944 | 01:01:27,431 | In. Out. | In. Out. |
| 403 | 01:01:27,535 | 01:01:31,659 | - The Dancer's in trouble. - The man in the moon. | - The Dancer's in trouble. - The man in the moon. |
| 404 | 01:01:31,993 | 01:01:38,070 | He's gonna go. Joe leaning desperately against the ropes. | He's gonna go. Joe leaning desperately against the ropes. |
| 405 | 01:01:38,174 | 01:01:41,279 | Hardly knows where he is. | Hardly knows where he is. |
| 406 | 01:01:41,384 | 01:01:44,491 | Uska Dara is a town in Turkey. | Uska Dara is a town in Turkey. |
| 407 | 01:01:44,595 | 01:01:50,046 | In the old days, many women had male secretaries. Well, that's Turkey. | In the old days, many women had male secretaries. Well, that's Turkey. |
| 408 | 01:01:50,470 | 01:01:55,254 | He's confused. I can see his wife, Laura, up there with him. | He's confused. I can see his wife, Laura, up there with him. |
| 409 | 01:01:55,358 | 01:01:59,598 | - He doesn't even know his own wife. - The man in the moon. | - He doesn't even know his own wife. - The man in the moon. |
| 410 | 01:02:01,981 | 01:02:03,774 | Joe's on the deck! | Joe's on the deck! |
| 411 | 01:02:09,364 | 01:02:11,156 | Come back! | Come back! |
| 412 | 01:02:16,037 | 01:02:18,611 | He's brilliant! | He's brilliant! |
| 413 | 01:02:19,958 | 01:02:23,993 | I'd never have let him if I had known who he was. | I'd never have let him if I had known who he was. |
| 414 | 01:02:24,097 | 01:02:29,204 | I wasn't that surprised when the detective sergeant told me. | I wasn't that surprised when the detective sergeant told me. |
| 415 | 01:02:29,309 | 01:02:34,001 | I mean, to be that good, he had to be somebody. | I mean, to be that good, he had to be somebody. |
| 416 | 01:02:34,105 | 01:02:37,218 | I mean, he is good. | I mean, he is good. |
| 417 | 01:02:42,063 | 01:02:48,019 | Jack. Out of trouble means out of sight, all right? | Jack. Out of trouble means out of sight, all right? |
| 418 | 01:02:48,778 | 01:02:52,646 | Vanish, or we'll make you vanish. | Vanish, or we'll make you vanish. |
| 419 | 01:03:05,753 | 01:03:08,874 | This is your lucky day. | This is your lucky day. |
| 420 | 01:03:14,220 | 01:03:20,888 | I suppose it's just a sentimental continental point of view | I suppose it's just a sentimental continental point of view |
| 421 | 01:03:21,060 | 01:03:27,431 | But when out with English gentlemen, what torment I go through | But when out with English gentlemen, what torment I go through |
| 422 | 01:03:28,359 | 01:03:31,972 | Exercising fascinations | Exercising fascinations |
| 423 | 01:03:32,077 | 01:03:36,145 | Till at last I lose my patience | Till at last I lose my patience |
| 424 | 01:03:36,249 | 01:03:39,650 | For it is hard to understand | For it is hard to understand |
| 425 | 01:03:39,754 | 01:03:44,780 | That in your peculiar land | That in your peculiar land |
| 426 | 01:03:44,884 | 01:03:48,542 | Englishmen never make love by day | Englishmen never make love by day |
| 427 | 01:03:49,213 | 01:03:53,082 | It can't be helped It's just their way | It can't be helped It's just their way |
| 428 | 01:03:53,259 | 01:03:57,472 | It isn't good form to be warm | It isn't good form to be warm |
| 429 | 01:03:57,638 | 01:04:00,842 | In the heat of the sun | In the heat of the sun |
| 430 | 01:04:01,017 | 01:04:05,265 | You mustn't nestle or gaze too much | You mustn't nestle or gaze too much |
| 431 | 01:04:05,438 | 01:04:09,603 | You mustn't whisper or even touch | You mustn't whisper or even touch |
| 432 | 01:04:09,776 | 01:04:14,024 | You mustn't reveal what you feel | You mustn't reveal what you feel |
| 433 | 01:04:14,197 | 01:04:18,242 | While you're missing the fun | While you're missing the fun |
| 434 | 01:04:18,409 | 01:04:22,455 | You mustn't say darling, you mustn't hold hands | You mustn't say darling, you mustn't hold hands |
| 435 | 01:04:22,622 | 01:04:25,458 | Or give him a hint he might | Or give him a hint he might |
| 436 | 01:04:26,542 | 01:04:31,668 | You must just sit and talk about cricket and glands | You must just sit and talk about cricket and glands |
| 437 | 01:04:31,839 | 01:04:34,509 | With no one at all in sight | With no one at all in sight |
| 438 | 01:04:35,676 | 01:04:39,545 | But never despair as you waste a way | But never despair as you waste a way |
| 439 | 01:04:39,722 | 01:04:43,887 | For in spite of your plight and your deep dismay | For in spite of your plight and your deep dismay |
| 440 | 01:04:44,060 | 01:04:47,975 | Though Englishmen never make love by day | Though Englishmen never make love by day |
| 441 | 01:04:48,147 | 01:04:54,352 | A t night they're quite all right | A t night they're quite all right |
| 442 | 01:04:56,406 | 01:04:59,526 | Englishmen wait for the clock to chime | Englishmen wait for the clock to chime |
| 443 | 01:04:59,784 | 01:05:04,152 | They won't light up till lighting-up time | They won't light up till lighting-up time |
| 444 | 01:05:04,256 | 01:05:07,860 | They think it's a sin to begin | They think it's a sin to begin |
| 445 | 01:05:07,964 | 01:05:10,451 | In the afternoon | In the afternoon |
| 446 | 01:05:11,671 | 01:05:15,616 | No matter how fond they feel of you | No matter how fond they feel of you |
| 447 | 01:05:15,721 | 01:05:20,095 | They won't say so if the skies are blue | They won't say so if the skies are blue |
| 448 | 01:05:20,263 | 01:05:23,882 | It isn't the thing in the spring | It isn't the thing in the spring |
| 449 | 01:05:24,058 | 01:05:27,179 | Or the Juniest June | Or the Juniest June |
| 450 | 01:05:27,353 | 01:05:31,434 | You can hear the thud of their Saxon blood | You can hear the thud of their Saxon blood |
| 451 | 01:05:31,607 | 01:05:34,609 | As they sit there all polite | As they sit there all polite |
| 452 | 01:05:34,777 | 01:05:38,906 | Like a block of wood or a stick in the mud | Like a block of wood or a stick in the mud |
| 453 | 01:05:39,073 | 01:05:43,902 | Saying "Is that so?"and "Quite" | Saying "Is that so?"and "Quite" |
| 454 | 01:05:45,413 | 01:05:49,903 | Just why it should be it is hard to say | Just why it should be it is hard to say |
| 455 | 01:05:50,007 | 01:05:54,657 | They know that we know that they know the way | They know that we know that they know the way |
| 456 | 01:05:54,762 | 01:05:58,913 | But though Englishmen never make love by day | But though Englishmen never make love by day |
| 457 | 01:05:59,017 | 01:06:06,307 | A t night they're quite all right | A t night they're quite all right |
| 458 | 01:06:26,245 | 01:06:29,366 | It's a good house. I need a drink. | It's a good house. I need a drink. |
| 459 | 01:06:29,832 | 01:06:32,613 | That was very exciting. | That was very exciting. |
| 460 | 01:06:32,717 | 01:06:38,826 | I used to represent this bombshell. I used to represent all this lot. | I used to represent this bombshell. I used to represent all this lot. |
| 461 | 01:06:38,930 | 01:06:45,629 | This is Bruno, Thomas and Jack Parker, the funniest people ever in Blackpool. | This is Bruno, Thomas and Jack Parker, the funniest people ever in Blackpool. |
| 462 | 01:06:45,734 | 01:06:49,971 | - And this is Bruno's ex, Katie. - I know you. | - And this is Bruno's ex, Katie. - I know you. |
| 463 | 01:06:50,728 | 01:06:56,306 | I'm honored to meet you. I'd like to see your material. | I'm honored to meet you. I'd like to see your material. |
| 464 | 01:06:56,410 | 01:07:00,474 | You see, boys, Mr Tarascas is buying material. | You see, boys, Mr Tarascas is buying material. |
| 465 | 01:07:00,579 | 01:07:04,812 | I'll explain all this properly to you. And paying very good money, too. | I'll explain all this properly to you. And paying very good money, too. |
| 466 | 01:07:04,916 | 01:07:09,066 | Only if I decide that... Yeah, sure, for instance... | Only if I decide that... Yeah, sure, for instance... |
| 467 | 01:07:09,170 | 01:07:14,704 | Jack, I'll make you a big offer for that tape. The tape is fabulous. | Jack, I'll make you a big offer for that tape. The tape is fabulous. |
| 468 | 01:07:14,877 | 01:07:16,289 | Hah! | Hah! |
| 469 | 01:07:18,422 | 01:07:20,659 | Is there a problem? | Is there a problem? |
| 470 | 01:07:20,763 | 01:07:26,844 | Have I said something un-British? You don't need the money! | Have I said something un-British? You don't need the money! |
| 471 | 01:07:29,433 | 01:07:33,591 | Mr Tarascas is a comedian, too. Very funny. | Mr Tarascas is a comedian, too. Very funny. |
| 472 | 01:07:33,695 | 01:07:37,429 | Boys, I think you'll need my help on this. | Boys, I think you'll need my help on this. |
| 473 | 01:07:37,533 | 01:07:40,683 | - It could be worthwhile. - Great. | - It could be worthwhile. - Great. |
| 474 | 01:07:40,787 | 01:07:46,153 | - Where can I catch your act? - We haven't done it for twelve years. | - Where can I catch your act? - We haven't done it for twelve years. |
| 475 | 01:08:03,843 | 01:08:08,470 | Yoo-hoo! You want some of this? | Yoo-hoo! You want some of this? |
| 476 | 01:08:15,354 | 01:08:19,685 | La mer, quand voit dancer | La mer, quand voit dancer |
| 477 | 01:08:31,412 | 01:08:34,248 | Two big ones, one little one. Thank you. | Two big ones, one little one. Thank you. |
| 478 | 01:08:37,376 | 01:08:39,453 | Three big... WAHHH! | Three big... WAHHH! |
| 479 | 01:08:45,593 | 01:08:47,421 | Please! | Please! |
| 480 | 01:08:52,099 | 01:08:53,725 | I wanna go. | I wanna go. |
| 481 | 01:09:50,491 | 01:09:53,327 | Where I've made a cross. | Where I've made a cross. |
| 482 | 01:09:55,037 | 01:09:57,992 | £1,000 for a look. The rest if I buy. | £1,000 for a look. The rest if I buy. |
| 483 | 01:10:00,960 | 01:10:05,955 | Bruno was my husband. I know the act. I also know about contracts. | Bruno was my husband. I know the act. I also know about contracts. |
| 484 | 01:10:06,132 | 01:10:09,632 | - Sure. - Bruno, Thomas... | - Sure. - Bruno, Thomas... |
| 485 | 01:10:11,595 | 01:10:15,502 | Bruno, look at me. Thomas, look at me. | Bruno, look at me. Thomas, look at me. |
| 486 | 01:10:15,607 | 01:10:19,384 | - We really need the money, Katie. - Don't sign. | - We really need the money, Katie. - Don't sign. |
| 487 | 01:10:20,062 | 01:10:23,426 | - There's something you don't like. - Yes! | - There's something you don't like. - Yes! |
| 488 | 01:10:23,530 | 01:10:28,763 | Look at page four, where it says 6A. That's what they call a quitclaim. | Look at page four, where it says 6A. That's what they call a quitclaim. |
| 489 | 01:10:28,867 | 01:10:32,861 | - What's that mean? - I know you need the money. | - What's that mean? - I know you need the money. |
| 490 | 01:10:33,033 | 01:10:36,653 | But you haven't understood. A quitclaim means that this man, | But you haven't understood. A quitclaim means that this man, |
| 491 | 01:10:36,829 | 01:10:39,368 | and only this man, can do your act. | and only this man, can do your act. |
| 492 | 01:10:39,540 | 01:10:42,237 | And us. If we get another chance. | And us. If we get another chance. |
| 493 | 01:10:42,342 | 01:10:46,908 | No, boys! You're signing away your right | No, boys! You're signing away your right |
| 494 | 01:10:47,012 | 01:10:52,048 | to perform your act, that you took 20 years in perfecting. | to perform your act, that you took 20 years in perfecting. |
| 495 | 01:10:52,219 | 01:10:54,758 | You'll never be able to do it again. | You'll never be able to do it again. |
| 496 | 01:10:54,930 | 01:11:00,130 | Haven't you grasped the point? They're never going to work again! | Haven't you grasped the point? They're never going to work again! |
| 497 | 01:11:00,235 | 01:11:03,644 | You understood this. You bastard! | You understood this. You bastard! |
| 498 | 01:11:06,734 | 01:11:12,600 | - You don't have a high opinion of me. - The man's insulted. I'm very sorry. | - You don't have a high opinion of me. - The man's insulted. I'm very sorry. |
| 499 | 01:11:12,704 | 01:11:15,237 | But these are the people who are being insulted! | But these are the people who are being insulted! |
| 500 | 01:11:15,409 | 01:11:18,779 | How do we know that you won't make such a cock-up of this act | How do we know that you won't make such a cock-up of this act |
| 501 | 01:11:18,954 | 01:11:23,119 | that it will never be seen again in the history of the world? | that it will never be seen again in the history of the world? |
| 502 | 01:11:23,292 | 01:11:28,418 | Are you a funny man, Mr Tarascas? How funny are you? | Are you a funny man, Mr Tarascas? How funny are you? |
| 503 | 01:11:31,675 | 01:11:36,338 | Either they want to trade or they don't. Nobody's forcing them. | Either they want to trade or they don't. Nobody's forcing them. |
| 504 | 01:11:36,847 | 01:11:40,211 | You're just a rich, spoiled brat! | You're just a rich, spoiled brat! |
| 505 | 01:11:40,315 | 01:11:45,509 | You don't have the humanity to see this is not just buying a few jokes. | You don't have the humanity to see this is not just buying a few jokes. |
| 506 | 01:11:45,613 | 01:11:49,929 | This is buying their lives! C'est monstrueux. | This is buying their lives! C'est monstrueux. |
| 507 | 01:11:50,033 | 01:11:53,195 | What's more, it is absurd! | What's more, it is absurd! |
| 508 | 01:12:15,469 | 01:12:18,915 | I have no desire to buy these gentleman's lives. | I have no desire to buy these gentleman's lives. |
| 509 | 01:12:19,020 | 01:12:22,173 | I respect your concern, Mrs Whatever-your-name-is. | I respect your concern, Mrs Whatever-your-name-is. |
| 510 | 01:12:22,277 | 01:12:26,931 | But this hysterical talk grates on me. Do we have a deal or don't we? | But this hysterical talk grates on me. Do we have a deal or don't we? |
| 511 | 01:12:36,115 | 01:12:42,148 | If it's not too much to ask, may I now see what I risked £5,000 on? | If it's not too much to ask, may I now see what I risked £5,000 on? |
| 512 | 01:12:42,252 | 01:12:44,686 | Risked. | Risked. |
| 513 | 01:12:55,759 | 01:12:59,123 | What first? Looks like a restaurant sketch. | What first? Looks like a restaurant sketch. |
| 514 | 01:12:59,227 | 01:13:03,302 | You've never seen one like this. It's got stuff no one ever attempted. | You've never seen one like this. It's got stuff no one ever attempted. |
| 515 | 01:13:03,475 | 01:13:07,225 | - Nobody could touch 'em. - Good, that's what I want. | - Nobody could touch 'em. - Good, that's what I want. |
| 516 | 01:13:29,001 | 01:13:30,739 | Stop! | Stop! |
| 517 | 01:13:33,005 | 01:13:35,574 | Tell them to stop. | Tell them to stop. |
| 518 | 01:13:35,678 | 01:13:38,629 | Stop, lads. | Stop, lads. |
| 519 | 01:13:41,972 | 01:13:44,464 | Let me see something else. | Let me see something else. |
| 520 | 01:14:06,247 | 01:14:07,985 | Stop! | Stop! |
| 521 | 01:14:08,632 | 01:14:11,988 | We've got a routine with a comedy cabin and a dead fish. | We've got a routine with a comedy cabin and a dead fish. |
| 522 | 01:14:12,092 | 01:14:15,743 | I don't want to see it. Not today, thank you. | I don't want to see it. Not today, thank you. |
| 523 | 01:14:15,848 | 01:14:18,129 | Oh, boy. Can you beat this? | Oh, boy. Can you beat this? |
| 524 | 01:14:21,762 | 01:14:24,249 | He's probably just lost for words. | He's probably just lost for words. |
| 525 | 01:14:24,353 | 01:14:26,668 | It wasn't part of the deal, | It wasn't part of the deal, |
| 526 | 01:14:26,772 | 01:14:31,015 | but if you ask nicely, they might do the beating-each-other-up sketch. | but if you ask nicely, they might do the beating-each-other-up sketch. |
| 527 | 01:14:31,188 | 01:14:34,973 | - That never fails. It'll kill ya'. - No! | - That never fails. It'll kill ya'. - No! |
| 528 | 01:14:36,193 | 01:14:40,434 | - I don't want any more from them. - What the hell's the problem? | - I don't want any more from them. - What the hell's the problem? |
| 529 | 01:14:40,538 | 01:14:43,367 | What's the problem? I'll tell you. | What's the problem? I'll tell you. |
| 530 | 01:14:43,534 | 01:14:48,113 | I've seen all this stuff. This act doesn't even belong to them. | I've seen all this stuff. This act doesn't even belong to them. |
| 531 | 01:14:48,288 | 01:14:52,573 | - Then who does it belong to? - Don't tell me you don't know! | - Then who does it belong to? - Don't tell me you don't know! |
| 532 | 01:14:52,677 | 01:14:55,781 | OK... Taking me for a sucker is one thing. | OK... Taking me for a sucker is one thing. |
| 533 | 01:14:55,886 | 01:15:01,579 | Trying to sucker my father is another. When George Fawkes finds out you... | Trying to sucker my father is another. When George Fawkes finds out you... |
| 534 | 01:15:01,683 | 01:15:06,583 | - George Fawkes? - George is your father? You're Tommy? | - George Fawkes? - George is your father? You're Tommy? |
| 535 | 01:15:06,687 | 01:15:10,672 | I am. And I'll tell you who's angry here. I am! | I am. And I'll tell you who's angry here. I am! |
| 536 | 01:15:10,777 | 01:15:16,469 | - What about the £1,000? - They should pay, with interest! | - What about the £1,000? - They should pay, with interest! |
| 537 | 01:15:16,573 | 01:15:21,526 | - You'll be hearing from my lawyers! - You can reach me at my office. | - You'll be hearing from my lawyers! - You can reach me at my office. |
| 538 | 01:15:24,825 | 01:15:28,688 | Well, even if it's true, passing off isn't a UK offence. | Well, even if it's true, passing off isn't a UK offence. |
| 539 | 01:15:28,793 | 01:15:33,943 | - What do you mean "if"? - I'm afraid you owe them £1,000. | - What do you mean "if"? - I'm afraid you owe them £1,000. |
| 540 | 01:15:34,048 | 01:15:39,251 | Pay 'em! Go ahead! Pay 'em the whole amount. £5,000! | Pay 'em! Go ahead! Pay 'em the whole amount. £5,000! |
| 541 | 01:15:40,215 | 01:15:42,707 | What are you saying? | What are you saying? |
| 542 | 01:15:42,885 | 01:15:47,180 | It was their material first. I can't believe it wasn't. | It was their material first. I can't believe it wasn't. |
| 543 | 01:15:47,347 | 01:15:49,674 | Those guys can't lie. | Those guys can't lie. |
| 544 | 01:15:49,850 | 01:15:55,142 | Oh, God, tell them I'm sorry. It's not them I'm angry at. | Oh, God, tell them I'm sorry. It's not them I'm angry at. |
| 545 | 01:15:56,148 | 01:15:59,639 | My father stole material. | My father stole material. |
| 546 | 01:15:59,743 | 01:16:03,235 | Gosh! I see. | Gosh! I see. |
| 547 | 01:16:20,339 | 01:16:26,378 | - I had a little red car. - Yes. You drove it into everything. | - I had a little red car. - Yes. You drove it into everything. |
| 548 | 01:16:26,929 | 01:16:29,000 | Did the sun shine every day? | Did the sun shine every day? |
| 549 | 01:16:29,104 | 01:16:34,436 | No. You were just a little boy. You were six when you left. | No. You were just a little boy. You were six when you left. |
| 550 | 01:16:35,771 | 01:16:38,393 | But we were happy, right? Why did we leave in such a hurry? | But we were happy, right? Why did we leave in such a hurry? |
| 551 | 01:16:38,565 | 01:16:41,354 | Why did we never see you again? | Why did we never see you again? |
| 552 | 01:16:42,820 | 01:16:46,561 | Yes, it was a special time. | Yes, it was a special time. |
| 553 | 01:16:46,665 | 01:16:52,068 | We worked together, we laughed together, we lived together. | We worked together, we laughed together, we lived together. |
| 554 | 01:16:52,173 | 01:16:56,108 | Something was bound to happen. | Something was bound to happen. |
| 555 | 01:16:56,212 | 01:16:59,044 | Then it was time for you to go. | Then it was time for you to go. |
| 556 | 01:16:59,211 | 01:17:03,921 | Your father took his little boy, his lovely wife | Your father took his little boy, his lovely wife |
| 557 | 01:17:04,091 | 01:17:07,212 | and an act that didn't belong to him. | and an act that didn't belong to him. |
| 558 | 01:17:08,095 | 01:17:11,216 | We never heard from him again. | We never heard from him again. |
| 559 | 01:17:12,474 | 01:17:15,844 | He left us with nothing. | He left us with nothing. |
| 560 | 01:17:19,982 | 01:17:22,022 | Sorry, I... | Sorry, I... |
| 561 | 01:17:23,986 | 01:17:27,107 | Well, not quite nothing. | Well, not quite nothing. |
| 562 | 01:17:42,171 | 01:17:45,208 | What do you mean? | What do you mean? |
| 563 | 01:17:48,635 | 01:17:55,250 | - Why are you laughing? - You're so opposite. Half-brothers. | - Why are you laughing? - You're so opposite. Half-brothers. |
| 564 | 01:17:55,355 | 01:17:58,637 | My God, it's so funny. | My God, it's so funny. |
| 565 | 01:17:59,605 | 01:18:03,555 | Tommy, what did you expect to find? | Tommy, what did you expect to find? |
| 566 | 01:18:08,030 | 01:18:11,506 | Be my love | Be my love |
| 567 | 01:18:12,618 | 01:18:18,787 | For no one else can end this yearning | For no one else can end this yearning |
| 568 | 01:18:19,625 | 01:18:25,960 | This need that you and you alone create | This need that you and you alone create |
| 569 | 01:18:27,257 | 01:18:32,882 | Just fill my arms the way you fill my... | Just fill my arms the way you fill my... |
| 570 | 01:19:09,508 | 01:19:15,707 | Tommy! Your father is worried to death. He's in the pool. | Tommy! Your father is worried to death. He's in the pool. |
| 571 | 01:19:15,811 | 01:19:20,136 | Hold on. Wait a minute. Hold on. Don't go away. | Hold on. Wait a minute. Hold on. Don't go away. |
| 572 | 01:19:22,062 | 01:19:27,262 | Don't tell Dad I called. I want to tell him everything in my own way. | Don't tell Dad I called. I want to tell him everything in my own way. |
| 573 | 01:19:27,366 | 01:19:31,600 | George! Quick, it's Tommy. He's on the phone. | George! Quick, it's Tommy. He's on the phone. |
| 574 | 01:19:31,704 | 01:19:33,904 | Forget the shoes. | Forget the shoes. |
| 575 | 01:19:36,660 | 01:19:41,028 | I'm hurrying, I'm hurrying. Martha, hold that, please. | I'm hurrying, I'm hurrying. Martha, hold that, please. |
| 576 | 01:19:41,132 | 01:19:44,326 | Hello, Tommy? You were great! They were bastards. | Hello, Tommy? You were great! They were bastards. |
| 577 | 01:19:44,501 | 01:19:47,586 | Did they come to laugh or be embalmed? | Did they come to laugh or be embalmed? |
| 578 | 01:19:47,754 | 01:19:52,660 | Your mom thinks you're in Hawaii, I think you're with that snake woman. | Your mom thinks you're in Hawaii, I think you're with that snake woman. |
| 579 | 01:19:52,765 | 01:19:56,205 | Don't feel you have to tell us where you are. | Don't feel you have to tell us where you are. |
| 580 | 01:19:56,310 | 01:20:00,711 | - I feel I should tell you where I am. - You don't have to. | - I feel I should tell you where I am. - You don't have to. |
| 581 | 01:20:00,815 | 01:20:03,507 | I want to tell you where I am. | I want to tell you where I am. |
| 582 | 01:20:03,611 | 01:20:06,967 | - OK, where are you? - Blackpool. | - OK, where are you? - Blackpool. |
| 583 | 01:20:07,072 | 01:20:09,474 | - You're where? - Where is he? | - You're where? - Where is he? |
| 584 | 01:20:14,448 | 01:20:18,105 | That's right, I'm in Blackpool. | That's right, I'm in Blackpool. |
| 585 | 01:20:18,210 | 01:20:21,692 | And Dad, I know everything. | And Dad, I know everything. |
| 586 | 01:20:21,797 | 01:20:24,327 | What's he saying? | What's he saying? |
| 587 | 01:20:24,541 | 01:20:26,572 | It's not a breakdown, is it? | It's not a breakdown, is it? |
| 588 | 01:20:26,677 | 01:20:31,536 | Quiet! I'm trying to listen. How did you find them? | Quiet! I'm trying to listen. How did you find them? |
| 589 | 01:20:31,640 | 01:20:33,952 | They found me. | They found me. |
| 590 | 01:20:34,056 | 01:20:37,580 | I'm coming over. | I'm coming over. |
| 591 | 01:20:37,684 | 01:20:40,544 | - Please don't come over. - I'm coming. | - Please don't come over. - I'm coming. |
| 592 | 01:20:40,648 | 01:20:42,634 | It would be better for me if you... | It would be better for me if you... |
| 593 | 01:20:44,478 | 01:20:46,139 | Tommy? | Tommy? |
| 594 | 01:20:49,274 | 01:20:52,359 | Don't do it, Dad. Please don't. | Don't do it, Dad. Please don't. |
| 595 | 01:20:52,527 | 01:20:54,613 | Tommy? | Tommy? |
| 596 | 01:20:55,864 | 01:20:57,608 | I lost him. | I lost him. |
| 597 | 01:20:59,326 | 01:21:02,281 | Where are you going? | Where are you going? |
| 598 | 01:21:13,757 | 01:21:16,759 | Do I get any kind of explanation? | Do I get any kind of explanation? |
| 599 | 01:21:17,886 | 01:21:22,088 | Look, I want to spend time with you. I think we can help each other. | Look, I want to spend time with you. I think we can help each other. |
| 600 | 01:21:22,192 | 01:21:26,256 | Show me whatever you want. I'm not afraid to learn. | Show me whatever you want. I'm not afraid to learn. |
| 601 | 01:21:26,360 | 01:21:30,980 | You see... I don't have long left. | You see... I don't have long left. |
| 602 | 01:21:34,444 | 01:21:40,855 | Your mother told me to leave you alone, but you can't shock me. | Your mother told me to leave you alone, but you can't shock me. |
| 603 | 01:21:40,959 | 01:21:43,869 | I want you to know that. | I want you to know that. |
| 604 | 01:24:50,682 | 01:24:52,420 | Jack? | Jack? |
| 605 | 01:25:48,740 | 01:25:50,734 | Silly thing. | Silly thing. |
| 606 | 01:26:26,820 | 01:26:29,738 | That's all? | That's all? |
| 607 | 01:26:29,906 | 01:26:35,530 | Poor Marcel. He was a real buddy. | Poor Marcel. He was a real buddy. |
| 608 | 01:26:38,456 | 01:26:42,870 | I've known him since we were in the army together. | I've known him since we were in the army together. |
| 609 | 01:26:43,545 | 01:26:46,997 | You were in the army? | You were in the army? |
| 610 | 01:26:49,217 | 01:26:52,801 | I didn't know that. | I didn't know that. |
| 611 | 01:26:54,597 | 01:26:57,303 | What regiment might that be? | What regiment might that be? |
| 612 | 01:27:24,669 | 01:27:26,710 | Here you go. | Here you go. |
| 613 | 01:27:46,733 | 01:27:50,807 | That hurt! That really hurt! It shouldn't hurt. | That hurt! That really hurt! It shouldn't hurt. |
| 614 | 01:27:50,911 | 01:27:53,768 | - That's a straight nap. - You didn't pull your punch. | - That's a straight nap. - You didn't pull your punch. |
| 615 | 01:27:53,872 | 01:27:57,273 | - A pulled punch is called a nap. - Then give me a nap. | - A pulled punch is called a nap. - Then give me a nap. |
| 616 | 01:27:57,377 | 01:28:00,952 | You can't if you want big laughs, can ya? | You can't if you want big laughs, can ya? |
| 617 | 01:28:01,122 | 01:28:03,745 | But we're rehearsing. You'll kill me. | But we're rehearsing. You'll kill me. |
| 618 | 01:28:03,917 | 01:28:07,168 | - I'll show you another way. - Good. | - I'll show you another way. - Good. |
| 619 | 01:28:33,279 | 01:28:37,112 | - Wait. I've had it with the slaps. - It won't hurt, honest. | - Wait. I've had it with the slaps. - It won't hurt, honest. |
| 620 | 01:28:38,118 | 01:28:41,238 | Don't flinch or I won't hit you. | Don't flinch or I won't hit you. |
| 621 | 01:28:47,418 | 01:28:50,255 | It didn't hurt. | It didn't hurt. |
| 622 | 01:28:51,172 | 01:28:53,960 | Now what? | Now what? |
| 623 | 01:28:58,888 | 01:29:03,878 | It's up your sleeve. The audience think it's in the newspaper. | It's up your sleeve. The audience think it's in the newspaper. |
| 624 | 01:29:03,982 | 01:29:09,518 | But you keep it up your sleeve. Let it out through the newspaper. | But you keep it up your sleeve. Let it out through the newspaper. |
| 625 | 01:29:09,941 | 01:29:12,222 | That's neat. | That's neat. |
| 626 | 01:29:12,327 | 01:29:13,897 | That's really neat. | That's really neat. |
| 627 | 01:29:19,659 | 01:29:22,068 | Did you see this? | Did you see this? |
| 628 | 01:29:24,330 | 01:29:26,573 | You stole two feet? | You stole two feet? |
| 629 | 01:29:33,506 | 01:29:37,119 | A part of you guys has always stayed with me. | A part of you guys has always stayed with me. |
| 630 | 01:29:37,223 | 01:29:39,924 | Yeah, the act. | Yeah, the act. |
| 631 | 01:29:44,601 | 01:29:48,220 | What's he like? | What's he like? |
| 632 | 01:29:50,315 | 01:29:53,815 | I believe he's greater, | I believe he's greater, |
| 633 | 01:29:53,985 | 01:29:57,070 | funnier than any of us. | funnier than any of us. |
| 634 | 01:30:00,992 | 01:30:03,023 | It's like... | It's like... |
| 635 | 01:30:03,127 | 01:30:08,541 | If we'd wanted the funniest child at the expense of everything else, | If we'd wanted the funniest child at the expense of everything else, |
| 636 | 01:30:09,834 | 01:30:13,659 | then our prayers were answered. | then our prayers were answered. |
| 637 | 01:30:13,763 | 01:30:16,710 | Too loudly. | Too loudly. |
| 638 | 01:30:21,012 | 01:30:26,600 | - You know, people say love child? - Yes, in the sixties. Go on. | - You know, people say love child? - Yes, in the sixties. Go on. |
| 639 | 01:30:28,436 | 01:30:34,890 | I know you and Katie were in love. I don't mind. Honest, I don't. | I know you and Katie were in love. I don't mind. Honest, I don't. |
| 640 | 01:30:36,486 | 01:30:41,149 | But it's like he's a laugh child. | But it's like he's a laugh child. |
| 641 | 01:30:44,369 | 01:30:47,952 | And we've all paid for it. | And we've all paid for it. |
| 642 | 01:30:51,918 | 01:30:54,283 | Shall I pull him back up? | Shall I pull him back up? |
| 643 | 01:30:54,387 | 01:30:56,586 | Shall I? | Shall I? |
| 644 | 01:30:57,799 | 01:30:59,923 | Shall I? | Shall I? |
| 645 | 01:31:12,146 | 01:31:16,681 | After the accident, they told us to plead that he was | After the accident, they told us to plead that he was |
| 646 | 01:31:16,785 | 01:31:19,268 | maladjusted. To put him in a home. | maladjusted. To put him in a home. |
| 647 | 01:31:24,242 | 01:31:26,734 | Let me out. | Let me out. |
| 648 | 01:31:33,167 | 01:31:37,241 | The comedy of the magnificent shambles. | The comedy of the magnificent shambles. |
| 649 | 01:31:37,346 | 01:31:41,419 | Purposeful, intentional chaos. | Purposeful, intentional chaos. |
| 650 | 01:31:43,302 | 01:31:47,432 | If it isn't funny, you die a double death. Right? | If it isn't funny, you die a double death. Right? |
| 651 | 01:31:47,598 | 01:31:49,473 | Isn't that right? | Isn't that right? |
| 652 | 01:32:00,069 | 01:32:02,644 | OK, let's start. | OK, let's start. |
| 653 | 01:32:03,531 | 01:32:08,943 | I never saw anything funny that wasn't terrible, didn't cause pain. | I never saw anything funny that wasn't terrible, didn't cause pain. |
| 654 | 01:32:09,047 | 01:32:11,611 | Jack believed that more than any of us. | Jack believed that more than any of us. |
| 655 | 01:32:14,333 | 01:32:18,498 | He saw things he shouldn't have seen. | He saw things he shouldn't have seen. |
| 656 | 01:32:20,006 | 01:32:25,843 | It wasn't Katie's fault. Francesco used to bait him with it. | It wasn't Katie's fault. Francesco used to bait him with it. |
| 657 | 01:33:46,217 | 01:33:47,260 | No! | No! |
| 658 | 01:34:40,855 | 01:34:43,976 | Why did you stop? | Why did you stop? |
| 659 | 01:35:04,420 | 01:35:10,037 | Did they laugh? In Vegas, when you took over the spot? | Did they laugh? In Vegas, when you took over the spot? |
| 660 | 01:35:10,141 | 01:35:13,664 | - You know about that? - Did they laugh? | - You know about that? - Did they laugh? |
| 661 | 01:35:13,768 | 01:35:17,920 | You know the one they liked best? The joke I bought from Sammy Feingold | You know the one they liked best? The joke I bought from Sammy Feingold |
| 662 | 01:35:18,024 | 01:35:23,090 | two days before his triple bypass. Or 3 days before his double bypass. | two days before his triple bypass. Or 3 days before his double bypass. |
| 663 | 01:35:23,194 | 01:35:26,930 | - It's wartime France, right? - I don't want to hear it. | - It's wartime France, right? - I don't want to hear it. |
| 664 | 01:35:27,034 | 01:35:33,021 | There's a dogfight, and in it is François the Fighter Pilot. | There's a dogfight, and in it is François the Fighter Pilot. |
| 665 | 01:35:33,125 | 01:35:35,186 | Dad! I don't want to hear it. | Dad! I don't want to hear it. |
| 666 | 01:35:35,291 | 01:35:39,442 | He takes a hit. His plane is on fire and crashes in a cornfield. | He takes a hit. His plane is on fire and crashes in a cornfield. |
| 667 | 01:35:39,546 | 01:35:42,364 | Please, stop. I'm asking you to stop. | Please, stop. I'm asking you to stop. |
| 668 | 01:35:42,469 | 01:35:46,615 | Wait a minute. This girl comes running out of the farmhouse | Wait a minute. This girl comes running out of the farmhouse |
| 669 | 01:35:46,720 | 01:35:51,541 | and pulls his body from the blaze. She nurses him back to health. | and pulls his body from the blaze. She nurses him back to health. |
| 670 | 01:35:51,717 | 01:35:54,340 | - I don't wanna hear it. - Tommy, listen. | - I don't wanna hear it. - Tommy, listen. |
| 671 | 01:35:54,512 | 01:35:59,305 | This is terrific! He takes her on a picnic to show his gratitude. | This is terrific! He takes her on a picnic to show his gratitude. |
| 672 | 01:35:59,475 | 01:36:02,975 | I don't wanna hear any more funny stories! | I don't wanna hear any more funny stories! |
| 673 | 01:36:03,980 | 01:36:06,388 | Why are you so angry? | Why are you so angry? |
| 674 | 01:36:10,111 | 01:36:13,563 | Because the King of Originality stole his act, | Because the King of Originality stole his act, |
| 675 | 01:36:13,739 | 01:36:17,026 | because Mr Generosity is a thief and a liar, | because Mr Generosity is a thief and a liar, |
| 676 | 01:36:17,201 | 01:36:21,247 | because now I know why Mother is the way she is, | because now I know why Mother is the way she is, |
| 677 | 01:36:21,414 | 01:36:26,290 | and because the Parkers brought up your son and lost everything! | and because the Parkers brought up your son and lost everything! |
| 678 | 01:36:31,382 | 01:36:36,211 | I'm angry because for 30 years I had this memory | I'm angry because for 30 years I had this memory |
| 679 | 01:36:36,387 | 01:36:39,175 | of sunshine and smiling people. | of sunshine and smiling people. |
| 680 | 01:36:39,348 | 01:36:42,469 | It wasn't all sunshine and smiles for them. | It wasn't all sunshine and smiles for them. |
| 681 | 01:36:48,107 | 01:36:51,265 | We left them a lifetime of pain. | We left them a lifetime of pain. |
| 682 | 01:36:51,370 | 01:36:54,481 | Tommy, hear me! Tommy! | Tommy, hear me! Tommy! |
| 683 | 01:36:56,991 | 01:37:00,936 | What happened happened because of love. | What happened happened because of love. |
| 684 | 01:37:01,041 | 01:37:07,280 | We left because Katie got pregnant. We both thought it was for the best. | We left because Katie got pregnant. We both thought it was for the best. |
| 685 | 01:37:07,385 | 01:37:11,534 | I'd have gotten in touch, but I thought I'd done enough damage. | I'd have gotten in touch, but I thought I'd done enough damage. |
| 686 | 01:37:11,638 | 01:37:16,665 | Why did you steal their whole act? Because you loved them so much? | Why did you steal their whole act? Because you loved them so much? |
| 687 | 01:37:16,769 | 01:37:21,878 | No, because I wanted a new act that no one had seen in the States. | No, because I wanted a new act that no one had seen in the States. |
| 688 | 01:37:21,983 | 01:37:27,674 | I was ambitious. Is that a crime? Did you never steal material, son? | I was ambitious. Is that a crime? Did you never steal material, son? |
| 689 | 01:37:27,778 | 01:37:33,100 | I knew their act. It was a way in for me. Just a way in. | I knew their act. It was a way in for me. Just a way in. |
| 690 | 01:37:33,204 | 01:37:37,904 | I did it a couple of years, then I became a joke man. | I did it a couple of years, then I became a joke man. |
| 691 | 01:37:39,867 | 01:37:43,313 | Let me tell you something straight. | Let me tell you something straight. |
| 692 | 01:37:43,417 | 01:37:46,082 | About what kills me. | About what kills me. |
| 693 | 01:37:46,248 | 01:37:50,378 | It kills me that I got lazy, using writers, not using me. | It kills me that I got lazy, using writers, not using me. |
| 694 | 01:37:50,544 | 01:37:54,702 | We were funny! We didn't have to tell funny stories. We were funny. | We were funny! We didn't have to tell funny stories. We were funny. |
| 695 | 01:37:54,806 | 01:37:57,874 | We had funny bones! | We had funny bones! |
| 696 | 01:37:57,978 | 01:38:05,044 | And what kills me most is watching my own son flop time after time. | And what kills me most is watching my own son flop time after time. |
| 697 | 01:38:05,149 | 01:38:10,803 | However much I spent on writers and coaches, it hasn't worked for you. | However much I spent on writers and coaches, it hasn't worked for you. |
| 698 | 01:38:10,907 | 01:38:14,639 | It's like you're too educated to be funny. | It's like you're too educated to be funny. |
| 699 | 01:38:14,744 | 01:38:19,564 | All this analysis. I did that! | All this analysis. I did that! |
| 700 | 01:38:19,740 | 01:38:21,817 | There are two types of comedians. | There are two types of comedians. |
| 701 | 01:38:21,992 | 01:38:25,817 | A funny bones comedian, and a non-funny bones comedian. | A funny bones comedian, and a non-funny bones comedian. |
| 702 | 01:38:25,921 | 01:38:31,537 | They're both funny. One is funny, the other tells funny. | They're both funny. One is funny, the other tells funny. |
| 703 | 01:38:33,129 | 01:38:35,703 | And Tommy... | And Tommy... |
| 704 | 01:38:38,050 | 01:38:44,045 | It's time you knew... and this kills me the most, | It's time you knew... and this kills me the most, |
| 705 | 01:38:44,149 | 01:38:46,679 | but you're neither. | but you're neither. |
| 706 | 01:38:47,601 | 01:38:50,271 | You're not funny. | You're not funny. |
| 707 | 01:38:54,525 | 01:39:00,730 | Know it now. They're not gonna cheer for you, no matter what you do. | Know it now. They're not gonna cheer for you, no matter what you do. |
| 708 | 01:39:04,201 | 01:39:07,073 | Did you fix it for the Parkers to perform? | Did you fix it for the Parkers to perform? |
| 709 | 01:39:07,246 | 01:39:11,292 | The brothers, not the boy. I'm trying to make it up to them. | The brothers, not the boy. I'm trying to make it up to them. |
| 710 | 01:39:11,459 | 01:39:14,710 | - Why not the boy? - He killed a guy! | - Why not the boy? - He killed a guy! |
| 711 | 01:39:14,879 | 01:39:18,742 | A boxer kills a guy, he maybe gets another fight. | A boxer kills a guy, he maybe gets another fight. |
| 712 | 01:39:18,846 | 01:39:22,960 | A clown kills a guy, you have to admit that's bad box office. | A clown kills a guy, you have to admit that's bad box office. |
| 713 | 01:39:23,064 | 01:39:28,420 | He's not like that. He's not crazy. And for God's sake, he's your son. | He's not like that. He's not crazy. And for God's sake, he's your son. |
| 714 | 01:39:28,525 | 01:39:31,714 | I'm sorry. Even God couldn't swing that one. | I'm sorry. Even God couldn't swing that one. |
| 715 | 01:39:31,818 | 01:39:36,552 | But the brothers are taken care of. They're topping the bill. | But the brothers are taken care of. They're topping the bill. |
| 716 | 01:39:36,657 | 01:39:39,225 | They happy? | They happy? |
| 717 | 01:40:04,803 | 01:40:06,927 | I've been diggin' my... | I've been diggin' my... |
| 718 | 01:40:13,354 | 01:40:17,352 | I can't work anywhere anyway. The policeman won't let me. | I can't work anywhere anyway. The policeman won't let me. |
| 719 | 01:40:18,901 | 01:40:20,396 | Jack, my darling, | Jack, my darling, |
| 720 | 01:40:20,569 | 01:40:25,647 | this man Sharkey, this horrible policeman, | this man Sharkey, this horrible policeman, |
| 721 | 01:40:25,825 | 01:40:31,358 | I will use all my power to make him disappear for ever. | I will use all my power to make him disappear for ever. |
| 722 | 01:40:31,462 | 01:40:33,449 | I promise. | I promise. |
| 723 | 01:40:40,089 | 01:40:41,827 | Jack. | Jack. |
| 724 | 01:40:46,053 | 01:40:48,917 | Our suffering is special. | Our suffering is special. |
| 725 | 01:40:49,022 | 01:40:55,267 | The pain we feel is worse than anyone else. | The pain we feel is worse than anyone else. |
| 726 | 01:40:56,772 | 01:41:03,016 | But the sunrise we see is more beautiful than anyone else. | But the sunrise we see is more beautiful than anyone else. |
| 727 | 01:41:03,120 | 01:41:07,269 | The Parkers is... like the moon. | The Parkers is... like the moon. |
| 728 | 01:41:07,373 | 01:41:12,907 | There's one side forever dark. Invisible. As it should be. | There's one side forever dark. Invisible. As it should be. |
| 729 | 01:41:14,373 | 01:41:20,459 | But remember, the dark moon draws the tides also. | But remember, the dark moon draws the tides also. |
| 730 | 01:41:21,964 | 01:41:25,548 | Our time has come. | Our time has come. |
| 731 | 01:41:26,927 | 01:41:30,878 | That's the most wonderful thing you've said in years. | That's the most wonderful thing you've said in years. |
| 732 | 01:41:31,724 | 01:41:35,592 | That's the only thing I said in years. | That's the only thing I said in years. |
| 733 | 01:41:37,855 | 01:41:40,514 | And so it is | And so it is |
| 734 | 01:41:40,618 | 01:41:43,645 | that Blackpool welcomes back... | that Blackpool welcomes back... |
| 735 | 01:41:44,445 | 01:41:47,114 | George Fawkes! | George Fawkes! |
| 736 | 01:41:50,117 | 01:41:54,330 | George, by the way, when the time comes... | George, by the way, when the time comes... |
| 737 | 01:42:08,636 | 01:42:12,052 | I love this town! | I love this town! |
| 738 | 01:42:50,260 | 01:42:53,179 | - You clapped for yourself yet? - No. | - You clapped for yourself yet? - No. |
| 739 | 01:42:53,347 | 01:42:56,515 | Let's hope we're not the only ones who do. | Let's hope we're not the only ones who do. |
| 740 | 01:43:13,659 | 01:43:18,405 | - That feels better. - You're right. It does. | - That feels better. - You're right. It does. |
| 741 | 01:43:58,954 | 01:44:01,031 | Jack... | Jack... |
| 742 | 01:44:01,498 | 01:44:03,575 | Jesus Christ! | Jesus Christ! |
| 743 | 01:44:17,055 | 01:44:19,892 | Wait a minute! Are you in the circus? | Wait a minute! Are you in the circus? |
| 744 | 01:44:20,058 | 01:44:23,974 | Are you a policeman? Same answer. Sometimes. | Are you a policeman? Same answer. Sometimes. |
| 745 | 01:44:24,146 | 01:44:27,259 | Are you French? You smell French. | Are you French? You smell French. |
| 746 | 01:44:27,364 | 01:44:31,487 | You smell like a toilet. Look at you. What happened? | You smell like a toilet. Look at you. What happened? |
| 747 | 01:44:34,531 | 01:44:37,569 | Bill, Richard? Find Jack Parker! | Bill, Richard? Find Jack Parker! |
| 748 | 01:44:44,875 | 01:44:46,946 | Who are you? | Who are you? |
| 749 | 01:44:47,050 | 01:44:51,588 | I am Cleopatra, queen of all Egypt | I am Cleopatra, queen of all Egypt |
| 750 | 01:44:51,757 | 01:44:54,130 | and goddess of love. | and goddess of love. |
| 751 | 01:45:03,101 | 01:45:08,258 | - What's wrong with your trousers? - Never mind. Find Jack Parker now. | - What's wrong with your trousers? - Never mind. Find Jack Parker now. |
| 752 | 01:45:08,362 | 01:45:14,147 | I've called in some more men. I don't like it. I've seen... | I've called in some more men. I don't like it. I've seen... |
| 753 | 01:45:17,324 | 01:45:20,527 | ..faces. Cleopatra. | ..faces. Cleopatra. |
| 754 | 01:45:21,370 | 01:45:23,280 | Slaves. | Slaves. |
| 755 | 01:45:25,082 | 01:45:27,530 | - How do you mean? - I don't know. | - How do you mean? - I don't know. |
| 756 | 01:45:27,634 | 01:45:32,669 | But it's all getting a bit French. And I don't like it. | But it's all getting a bit French. And I don't like it. |
| 757 | 01:46:35,527 | 01:46:41,144 | He whose invisible perfume will carry as swift as fear | He whose invisible perfume will carry as swift as fear |
| 758 | 01:46:41,249 | 01:46:46,441 | shall my asp find and take with me to my grave. | shall my asp find and take with me to my grave. |
| 759 | 01:46:46,545 | 01:46:49,652 | And I, breathless, | And I, breathless, |
| 760 | 01:46:49,756 | 01:46:52,787 | power breathe forth! | power breathe forth! |
| 761 | 01:47:04,389 | 01:47:08,055 | - What happened to your trousers? - It's nothing. | - What happened to your trousers? - It's nothing. |
| 762 | 01:50:03,110 | 01:50:05,684 | Best of luck, boys. | Best of luck, boys. |
| 763 | 01:50:06,279 | 01:50:09,605 | We miss them. We welcome them back! | We miss them. We welcome them back! |
| 764 | 01:50:09,709 | 01:50:13,524 | Ladies and gentlemen, I give you | Ladies and gentlemen, I give you |
| 765 | 01:50:13,628 | 01:50:16,373 | the Parker Brothers! | the Parker Brothers! |
| 766 | 01:50:24,172 | 01:50:27,293 | - Everything all right, boys? - Great. | - Everything all right, boys? - Great. |
| 767 | 01:50:45,485 | 01:50:47,693 | It's talcum powder. | It's talcum powder. |
| 768 | 01:50:56,246 | 01:50:58,204 | Get off me! | Get off me! |
| 769 | 01:51:10,177 | 01:51:13,297 | Vive la resistance! | Vive la resistance! |
| 770 | 01:52:40,392 | 01:52:42,266 | You OK? | You OK? |
| 771 | 01:53:52,130 | 01:53:55,417 | We got a call from Sharkey. No one knows where he is. | We got a call from Sharkey. No one knows where he is. |
| 772 | 01:53:59,220 | 01:54:00,881 | Come on. | Come on. |
| 773 | 01:54:02,057 | 01:54:06,221 | Who's doing the sway pole? Give us five minutes. I'll be back. | Who's doing the sway pole? Give us five minutes. I'll be back. |
| 774 | 01:54:08,355 | 01:54:10,894 | Boys, your sway pole is ready. | Boys, your sway pole is ready. |
| 775 | 01:54:14,361 | 01:54:17,279 | The finale. | The finale. |
| 776 | 01:56:09,893 | 01:56:12,562 | Climb the lamppost! | Climb the lamppost! |
| 777 | 02:03:17,445 | 02:03:19,143 | Tommy! | Tommy! |
| 778 | 02:03:19,248 | 02:03:20,986 | They're beginning to like you! | They're beginning to like you! |
| 778 | 02:03:19,248 | 02:03:20,986 | They're beginning to like you! | They're beginning to like you! |