# Start End Original Translated
1 00:00:05,555 00:00:08,816 Mom, can you, please take me driving? Please, please, please Mom, can you, please take me driving? Please, please, please
2 00:00:08,851 00:00:10,285 No, honey; I'm making dinner No, honey; I'm making dinner
3 00:00:10,296 00:00:11,613 But you promised! But you promised!
4 00:00:11,624 00:00:13,207 I lied; Welcome to life I lied; Welcome to life
5 00:00:14,050 00:00:15,629 Look, Kerry, could you just let.. Look, Kerry, could you just let..
6 00:00:15,640 00:00:17,316 ..your driving obsession go for two minutes? ..your driving obsession go for two minutes?
7 00:00:17,327 00:00:19,285 Your cousin C.J. will be here any minute Your cousin C.J. will be here any minute
8 00:00:19,325 00:00:21,012 Ew! [Rory] PBHT!! Ew! [Rory] PBHT!!
9 00:00:22,497 00:00:23,997 All right; Excuse me All right; Excuse me
10 00:00:24,527 00:00:26,941 If there's anything we have learned this year.. If there's anything we have learned this year..
11 00:00:26,958 00:00:29,583 ..it's the importance of 'Family' [mumbling] ..it's the importance of 'Family' [mumbling]
12 00:00:30,075 00:00:31,515 And C.J. is family And C.J. is family
13 00:00:31,547 00:00:32,547 Eww.. PBHT!! Eww.. PBHT!!
14 00:00:33,507 00:00:34,655 Stop it! Stop it!
15 00:00:34,666 00:00:36,601 Why should we care about seeing him? Why should we care about seeing him?
16 00:00:36,612 00:00:38,936 When we were kids, he was a big, huge bully When we were kids, he was a big, huge bully
17 00:00:38,947 00:00:40,272 He stole all my army men He stole all my army men
18 00:00:40,296 00:00:41,575 And he took my Debbie doll.. And he took my Debbie doll..
19 00:00:41,585 00:00:44,811 ..to 'entertain' Rory's army men while they were on leave ..to 'entertain' Rory's army men while they were on leave
20 00:00:44,835 00:00:47,264 Then he blew them all up with M-80s Then he blew them all up with M-80s
21 00:00:47,585 00:00:49,265 The boy's a bad egg, Cate The boy's a bad egg, Cate
22 00:00:49,288 00:00:51,663 Well, what's your problem with him? Dad Well, what's your problem with him? Dad
23 00:00:51,687 00:00:54,374 I loaned him money for his college education I loaned him money for his college education
24 00:00:54,403 00:00:55,903 Huh, I didn't know C.J. went to College Huh, I didn't know C.J. went to College
25 00:00:55,919 00:00:56,919 He didn't He didn't
26 00:00:57,794 00:00:58,839 [Horn honking] [Horn honking]
27 00:00:58,849 00:01:00,130 All right; That's him All right; That's him
28 00:01:00,146 00:01:02,911 Now, attitude adjustment, everybody Now, attitude adjustment, everybody
29 00:01:03,458 00:01:05,133 C.J. is my sister's son C.J. is my sister's son
30 00:01:05,143 00:01:07,385 So that's why we have to like him So that's why we have to like him
31 00:01:07,401 00:01:10,088 No; That's why we have to feel sorry for him No; That's why we have to feel sorry for him
32 00:01:11,096 00:01:13,742 I know he wasn't the best kid, but people change I know he wasn't the best kid, but people change
33 00:01:13,752 00:01:16,017 [Doorbell rings] And he's been in the Army [Doorbell rings] And he's been in the Army
34 00:01:16,041 00:01:18,119 I'm sure he's grown up a lot I'm sure he's grown up a lot
35 00:01:18,729 00:01:21,526 Ahh.. Aunt Cate! C.J.! Ahh.. Aunt Cate! C.J.!
36 00:01:21,636 00:01:22,636 Whoo! Whoo!
37 00:01:23,479 00:01:24,479 All right All right
38 00:01:27,425 00:01:30,135 This is it? This is as big as we get? This is it? This is as big as we get?
39 00:01:30,166 00:01:32,354 Hey, everybody. It's good to see ya! Hey, everybody. It's good to see ya!
40 00:01:32,391 00:01:35,586 Yeah, it's great to see you, too. Can you take me driving? Yeah, it's great to see you, too. Can you take me driving?
41 00:01:35,602 00:01:36,602 Kerry. Kerry.
42 00:01:37,368 00:01:38,793 Is that my 'gampa'? Uhh. Uh Is that my 'gampa'? Uhh. Uh
43 00:01:40,162 00:01:41,997 Is that 'pap-pap'? Is that 'pap-pap'?
44 00:01:42,466 00:01:45,013 'Ga-Ga', It's me! 'Ga-Ga', It's me!
45 00:01:45,732 00:01:48,066 Please, don't get up! Please, don't get up!
46 00:01:48,241 00:01:50,754 How's that College degree coming? How's that College degree coming?
47 00:01:51,059 00:01:53,276 That's a funny story; I didn't go That's a funny story; I didn't go
48 00:01:53,816 00:01:55,816 But I am paying you back, But I am paying you back,
49 00:01:55,847 00:01:58,034 in fact, here's a little downpayment in fact, here's a little downpayment
50 00:01:58,462 00:02:01,211 It's not dope money, Is it? I don't take dope money It's not dope money, Is it? I don't take dope money
51 00:02:01,306 00:02:03,500 Dad. C.J. just make yourself at home Dad. C.J. just make yourself at home
52 00:02:03,524 00:02:05,419 I'm gonna go check on dinner I'm gonna go check on dinner
53 00:02:05,678 00:02:07,076 Don't worry, grandpa Don't worry, grandpa
54 00:02:07,087 00:02:09,205 I've done quite well since I left the service I've done quite well since I left the service
55 00:02:09,216 00:02:12,427 Joined the carnival; Ran the 'Tilt-A-Whirl' Joined the carnival; Ran the 'Tilt-A-Whirl'
56 00:02:12,763 00:02:14,038 The "tilt a whirl"? The "tilt a whirl"?
57 00:02:14,049 00:02:15,584 It tilts, it whirls It does it all It tilts, it whirls It does it all
58 00:02:15,594 00:02:19,501 Strap in!! Watch 'em heave!! Here we go, people! Let's party!! Strap in!! Watch 'em heave!! Here we go, people! Let's party!!
59 00:02:22,395 00:02:24,442 Why the stink eye? Why the stink eye?
60 00:02:24,551 00:02:26,661 You blew up our toys You blew up our toys
61 00:02:26,927 00:02:29,327 War is hell, tiny butch up War is hell, tiny butch up
62 00:02:32,140 00:02:33,981 $1.000.. $1.000..
63 00:02:34,031 00:02:37,739 ..or a big screen Tv, or 'A Las Vegas' getaway.. ..or a big screen Tv, or 'A Las Vegas' getaway..
64 00:02:37,763 00:02:41,153 ..if you attend one time-share seminar ..if you attend one time-share seminar
65 00:02:41,164 00:02:44,849 Yeah, I guess you got to check out that time-share Yeah, I guess you got to check out that time-share
66 00:02:45,060 00:02:47,200 and buy a condo and buy a condo
67 00:02:47,248 00:02:49,372 by tomorrow by tomorrow
68 00:02:49,623 00:02:52,498 All right, everybody; Let's sit down for dinner All right, everybody; Let's sit down for dinner
69 00:02:52,509 00:02:54,110 I think I'll pass I think I'll pass
70 00:02:54,165 00:02:56,600 Bridget, Wow! [chuckles] Eh..eh Bridget, Wow! [chuckles] Eh..eh
71 00:02:56,610 00:02:58,458 You are really, really- You are really, really-
72 00:02:58,469 00:03:00,469 -related to you! -related to you!
73 00:03:00,966 00:03:04,246 Right. Got any friends who aren't? Right. Got any friends who aren't?
74 00:03:04,676 00:03:06,064 Can you take me driving? Can you take me driving?
75 00:03:06,074 00:03:08,777 Nice try, Raggedy Ann; No, thanks Nice try, Raggedy Ann; No, thanks
76 00:03:11,916 00:03:14,525 So, C.J. you're really here 'cause of our dad? So, C.J. you're really here 'cause of our dad?
77 00:03:14,556 00:03:16,666 Oh, yeah; I love uncle Paul Oh, yeah; I love uncle Paul
78 00:03:16,681 00:03:18,868 He was the one who drove me to the 'Recruitment Center' He was the one who drove me to the 'Recruitment Center'
79 00:03:18,900 00:03:22,240 He said: "Join the Army. It'll make a man out of you"; It worked for me He said: "Join the Army. It'll make a man out of you"; It worked for me
80 00:03:22,260 00:03:24,416 -Um, dad was never in the 'Service' -Yeah -Um, dad was never in the 'Service' -Yeah
81 00:03:24,552 00:03:26,206 Wait, what? Wait, what?
82 00:03:27,394 00:03:28,394 Aunt Cate Aunt Cate
83 00:03:28,933 00:03:31,073 Do you mind if I say grace? Do you mind if I say grace?
84 00:03:31,534 00:03:34,034 Well... my kids don't usually do that, Well... my kids don't usually do that,
85 00:03:34,050 00:03:36,935 but, yeah, that'd be a nice change but, yeah, that'd be a nice change
86 00:03:37,709 00:03:40,295 It's nice when people change, isn't it? It's nice when people change, isn't it?
87 00:03:40,779 00:03:42,779 Everyone? Everyone?
88 00:03:43,795 00:03:44,857 Dear Lord, Dear Lord,
89 00:03:44,928 00:03:48,131 Thank you for the food we are about to receive Thank you for the food we are about to receive
90 00:03:48,154 00:03:51,498 and thank you, for-[cellphone rings] I gotta take this and thank you, for-[cellphone rings] I gotta take this
91 00:03:52,127 00:03:54,674 What's up?! You did not!! What's up?! You did not!!
92 00:03:55,799 00:03:57,603 Oh, my God! [Door closes] Oh, my God! [Door closes]
93 00:03:57,666 00:03:59,510 Amen. Amen.
94 00:04:03,667 00:04:06,979 Well, it looks like C.J. left without kissing me goodbye Well, it looks like C.J. left without kissing me goodbye
95 00:04:06,995 00:04:09,471 Oh, come on, Cate, I'm crying on the inside Oh, come on, Cate, I'm crying on the inside
96 00:04:10,120 00:04:13,060 Well, in a second, you'll be crying on the outside Well, in a second, you'll be crying on the outside
97 00:04:13,071 00:04:14,251 He spent the night in his van He spent the night in his van
98 00:04:15,156 00:04:16,702 Okay, everyone, I need your help Okay, everyone, I need your help
99 00:04:16,712 00:04:18,573 It is candid picture week at school It is candid picture week at school
100 00:04:18,584 00:04:19,589 What's that? What's that?
101 00:04:19,600 00:04:21,223 It's when the yearbook staff take your picture It's when the yearbook staff take your picture
102 00:04:21,233 00:04:22,433 when you least expect it. when you least expect it.
103 00:04:22,444 00:04:24,066 They give me advance notice every year They give me advance notice every year
104 00:04:24,090 00:04:25,877 Um, Kerry, you might want to run a brush through that Um, Kerry, you might want to run a brush through that
105 00:04:25,887 00:04:28,231 So, I need help choosing my candid poses So, I need help choosing my candid poses
106 00:04:28,262 00:04:30,262 Maybe tomorrow, we can narrow down colleges Maybe tomorrow, we can narrow down colleges
107 00:04:30,279 00:04:32,708 Mom, let's be serious for like, 2 seconds, okay? Mom, let's be serious for like, 2 seconds, okay?
108 00:04:32,763 00:04:35,642 All right; So here is me chatting with friends All right; So here is me chatting with friends
109 00:04:35,986 00:04:38,939 Here is me studying for a test for finals Here is me studying for a test for finals
110 00:04:40,196 00:04:42,884 And, her's me, just being me And, her's me, just being me
111 00:04:44,980 00:04:47,033 And now, do you looking mindless And now, do you looking mindless
112 00:04:47,043 00:04:49,785 What? Oh, you nailed it! What? Oh, you nailed it!
113 00:04:50,829 00:04:52,118 Oh, it's cold out there! Oh, it's cold out there!
114 00:04:52,129 00:04:54,292 You mind if I plug this in and borrow some electricity.. You mind if I plug this in and borrow some electricity..
115 00:04:54,316 00:04:55,621 ..for a little space heater? ..for a little space heater?
116 00:04:55,644 00:04:57,011 No, help yourself No, help yourself
117 00:04:57,035 00:04:58,864 Can I borrow a little space heater? Can I borrow a little space heater?
118 00:04:58,888 00:05:01,200 Well, didn't you come in the house last night? Well, didn't you come in the house last night?
119 00:05:01,223 00:05:02,559 Somebody locked the dead bolt Somebody locked the dead bolt
120 00:05:02,576 00:05:04,226 Yeah, I know. [Laughs] Yeah, I know. [Laughs]
121 00:05:07,587 00:05:11,187 You know, why don't you guys catch up while I make breakfast? You know, why don't you guys catch up while I make breakfast?
122 00:05:13,688 00:05:15,044 Well, C.J. Well, C.J.
123 00:05:15,669 00:05:17,387 When are you gonna be leaving? When are you gonna be leaving?
124 00:05:17,398 00:05:20,679 Dad, - No, no; What I meant was, ah.. Dad, - No, no; What I meant was, ah..
125 00:05:20,715 00:05:24,539 How long is it gonna be, before you're not here anymore How long is it gonna be, before you're not here anymore
126 00:05:24,772 00:05:28,014 Well, you left in a hurry last night What was the big emergency? Well, you left in a hurry last night What was the big emergency?
127 00:05:28,063 00:05:30,322 I happened to score the last two tickets I happened to score the last two tickets
128 00:05:30,346 00:05:32,494 for the Aerosmith Concert, this weekend for the Aerosmith Concert, this weekend
129 00:05:32,517 00:05:34,088 You walked out on Cate's dinner You walked out on Cate's dinner
130 00:05:34,119 00:05:37,159 to get a couple of tickets to a rock'n'roll show? to get a couple of tickets to a rock'n'roll show?
131 00:05:37,222 00:05:40,885 I know you're excited, 'potsie', but I only got two tickets. I know you're excited, 'potsie', but I only got two tickets.
132 00:05:41,699 00:05:44,597 Mom, I'm not feeling well I'm not gonna go to school Mom, I'm not feeling well I'm not gonna go to school
133 00:05:44,637 00:05:46,964 Oh, honey. You all right? Oh, honey. You all right?
134 00:05:46,988 00:05:49,799 You know, there's a stomach thing going around You know, there's a stomach thing going around
135 00:05:49,847 00:05:51,799 Yeah. Oh! My stomach. Yeah. Oh! My stomach.
136 00:05:54,885 00:05:57,350 I'll just have my eggs in my room I'll just have my eggs in my room
137 00:05:57,360 00:05:58,860 Where's the tabasco? Where's the tabasco?
138 00:05:59,681 00:06:04,415 All right; What's going on? - Nothing I can talk to you about All right; What's going on? - Nothing I can talk to you about
139 00:06:05,142 00:06:06,451 Rory! Rory!
140 00:06:07,444 00:06:08,444 Ah... Ah...
141 00:06:09,451 00:06:11,236 He's got that look again He's got that look again
142 00:06:11,247 00:06:12,966 He needs a guy to talk to He needs a guy to talk to
143 00:06:13,436 00:06:15,287 Eh, I'll go Eh, I'll go
144 00:06:17,053 00:06:19,637 He needs a guy to talk to today He needs a guy to talk to today
145 00:06:20,269 00:06:22,394 Did you see that? Did you see that?! Did you see that? Did you see that?!
146 00:06:22,426 00:06:23,858 I know, dad I know, dad
147 00:06:26,334 00:06:27,459 [Knock on door] [Knock on door]
148 00:06:28,521 00:06:29,841 Hi Hey Hi Hey
149 00:06:32,318 00:06:34,828 I like what you've done with the place I like what you've done with the place
150 00:06:36,047 00:06:39,286 Let me guess. Girly mags behind the headboard? -No! Let me guess. Girly mags behind the headboard? -No!
151 00:06:40,177 00:06:41,177 Yes. Yes.
152 00:06:43,412 00:06:45,270 Listen, I know it's been a while Listen, I know it's been a while
153 00:06:45,294 00:06:48,446 since the whole army men- [imitates explosion] since the whole army men- [imitates explosion]
154 00:06:49,141 00:06:50,646 But if you ever want to talk- But if you ever want to talk-
155 00:06:50,657 00:06:52,032 Okay, see, there's this girl, Missy Okay, see, there's this girl, Missy
156 00:06:52,043 00:06:54,180 who's got these eyes that make me forget how to walk who's got these eyes that make me forget how to walk
157 00:06:54,191 00:06:55,230 and, when I'm around- and, when I'm around-
158 00:06:55,243 00:06:57,993 Easy, Mary; Let's skip the walks on the beach Easy, Mary; Let's skip the walks on the beach
159 00:06:58,362 00:07:00,893 [sighs] Keep it surfacey Ok, she's hot. I get it. Continue [sighs] Keep it surfacey Ok, she's hot. I get it. Continue
160 00:07:00,904 00:07:03,806 Yeah, she's got the prettiest eyes-Eh!, steady Yeah, she's got the prettiest eyes-Eh!, steady
161 00:07:05,335 00:07:07,389 [sighs] After we got done studying last night [sighs] After we got done studying last night
162 00:07:07,406 00:07:09,679 we were saying goodbye on her front porch we were saying goodbye on her front porch
163 00:07:09,710 00:07:12,405 and I think she might have wanted me to kiss her and I think she might have wanted me to kiss her
164 00:07:12,421 00:07:13,996 And I choked. I suck. And I choked. I suck.
165 00:07:14,015 00:07:16,783 You every try to kiss a girl and she whips her head back? You every try to kiss a girl and she whips her head back?
166 00:07:16,807 00:07:19,747 That is the worst. It's happened to me 5.000 times That is the worst. It's happened to me 5.000 times
167 00:07:20,102 00:07:22,698 They would rathercrack their head against he cement wall behind them They would rathercrack their head against he cement wall behind them
168 00:07:22,709 00:07:24,552 than have your gross lips touch- Okay! than have your gross lips touch- Okay!
169 00:07:25,021 00:07:26,146 Mary; My story? Mary; My story?
170 00:07:29,017 00:07:31,235 See, I've kissed girls before See, I've kissed girls before
171 00:07:31,275 00:07:34,579 I've just... never kissed a girl that way I've just... never kissed a girl that way
172 00:07:35,220 00:07:38,493 You know; With the, uh.. - Dude! You know; With the, uh.. - Dude!
173 00:07:41,089 00:07:42,739 Don't... dont do that Don't... dont do that
174 00:07:43,438 00:07:45,243 There's this dance coming up There's this dance coming up
175 00:07:45,254 00:07:47,632 I figure at some point, I might have to, you know- I figure at some point, I might have to, you know-
176 00:07:47,643 00:07:50,039 Well, Dude, what did I just say?! Well, Dude, what did I just say?!
177 00:07:50,787 00:07:53,362 Keep the tongue in or I walk; All right? Keep the tongue in or I walk; All right?
178 00:07:54,627 00:07:57,377 It, it's just... I don't want to do it wrong It, it's just... I don't want to do it wrong
179 00:07:57,440 00:07:59,090 It's a lot of pressure It's a lot of pressure
180 00:07:59,459 00:08:01,703 C.J., You've gone out with a lot of girls, right C.J., You've gone out with a lot of girls, right
181 00:08:01,734 00:08:03,945 Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah, lots Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah, lots
182 00:08:04,334 00:08:06,834 Carny groupies... Carny groupies wanabies Carny groupies... Carny groupies wanabies
183 00:08:07,889 00:08:09,633 You know, kissing's like anything else You know, kissing's like anything else
184 00:08:09,673 00:08:11,386 If you wanto to get good you got to practice If you wanto to get good you got to practice
185 00:08:11,397 00:08:12,922 Lots and lots of practice Lots and lots of practice
186 00:08:12,933 00:08:14,449 You're pretty smart, C.J. You're pretty smart, C.J.
187 00:08:14,481 00:08:17,418 Well, you know, they don't let just anyone in the Army Well, you know, they don't let just anyone in the Army
188 00:08:18,106 00:08:20,657 Really? I heard they did Really? I heard they did
189 00:08:21,720 00:08:23,626 [Bridget gasps] Nooo..!! - What?! [Bridget gasps] Nooo..!! - What?!
190 00:08:23,892 00:08:25,478 Jeez, Bridget, what is it? Jeez, Bridget, what is it?
191 00:08:25,502 00:08:28,402 You finally realized it's all downhill from here? You finally realized it's all downhill from here?
192 00:08:28,413 00:08:29,894 Oh, my God! I knew it! Oh, my God! I knew it!
193 00:08:29,905 00:08:32,454 There's a huge volcanic growth brewing at the end for my nose.. There's a huge volcanic growth brewing at the end for my nose..
194 00:08:32,465 00:08:34,933 ..just 7 hours before my candid picture day begins! ..just 7 hours before my candid picture day begins!
195 00:08:34,944 00:08:36,611 Why don't you just cover it? Why don't you just cover it?
196 00:08:36,622 00:08:38,878 With a ski mask With a ski mask
197 00:08:38,889 00:08:40,081 Okay, you know -I need medicine Okay, you know -I need medicine
198 00:08:40,092 00:08:41,289 We have to go to The Drug Store We have to go to The Drug Store
199 00:08:41,300 00:08:43,549 Sometimes you can outsmart them with a pre-emptive strike Sometimes you can outsmart them with a pre-emptive strike
200 00:08:43,560 00:08:44,789 Well; What do you need me for? Well; What do you need me for?
201 00:08:44,800 00:08:47,002 'Cause it's dark, and I'm scared and I need you to buy it 'Cause it's dark, and I'm scared and I need you to buy it
202 00:08:47,020 00:08:49,955 'cause I can't be seen getting zit medicine. So, let's go! C'nm!! 'cause I can't be seen getting zit medicine. So, let's go! C'nm!!
203 00:08:49,972 00:08:52,416 No. -Please! - No! -Please No. -Please! - No! -Please
204 00:08:53,416 00:08:55,454 Ok; I'll go with you on one condition.. Ok; I'll go with you on one condition..
205 00:08:55,465 00:08:56,649 I get to drive I get to drive
206 00:08:56,689 00:08:58,836 Um, no. No, no. You only have your learner's permit Um, no. No, no. You only have your learner's permit
207 00:08:58,861 00:08:59,970 It's too risky; No. It's too risky; No.
208 00:08:59,981 00:09:03,329 So is being photographed looking like a dalmatian. -Ohh!! So is being photographed looking like a dalmatian. -Ohh!!
209 00:09:07,657 00:09:11,068 I told you; You hit a pole. I looked! I swear I didn't see anything! I told you; You hit a pole. I looked! I swear I didn't see anything!
210 00:09:11,092 00:09:14,318 'Cause it was dark! I can't believe I let you drive. Mom is gonna kill us! 'Cause it was dark! I can't believe I let you drive. Mom is gonna kill us!
211 00:09:14,350 00:09:15,775 Ladies. Ladies.
212 00:09:16,389 00:09:17,460 -Hey -Hello -Hey -Hello
213 00:09:17,898 00:09:19,718 You know, your mom will never notice that dent.. You know, your mom will never notice that dent..
214 00:09:19,742 00:09:21,844 ..if you stand that way forever ..if you stand that way forever
215 00:09:24,327 00:09:27,239 Whoa! No you didn't Whoa! No you didn't
216 00:09:28,389 00:09:29,389 Mmm... Mmm...
217 00:09:29,541 00:09:32,564 Paint scraped, different color, nervous teens Paint scraped, different color, nervous teens
218 00:09:32,620 00:09:35,291 Obviously, you did this sneaking out last night Obviously, you did this sneaking out last night
219 00:09:35,323 00:09:38,385 [gasps] Bridget, he doesn't know what he's talking about [gasps] Bridget, he doesn't know what he's talking about
220 00:09:38,401 00:09:40,604 You drove! You let her! You drove! You let her!
221 00:09:40,909 00:09:41,915 Prove it! Prove it!
222 00:09:41,925 00:09:44,018 Seat's way up, Mirror's way down been there Seat's way up, Mirror's way down been there
223 00:09:44,489 00:09:46,543 Ohh, I'm so impressed, Mr Carny-man Ohh, I'm so impressed, Mr Carny-man
224 00:09:46,562 00:09:48,301 What are you gonna do next, guess my weight? What are you gonna do next, guess my weight?
225 00:09:48,348 00:09:49,629 101 [gasps] 101 [gasps]
226 00:09:50,161 00:09:53,276 Motive, Why?, why?, why? Motive, Why?, why?, why?
227 00:09:54,065 00:09:56,362 What could it be? What could it be?
228 00:09:57,276 00:09:58,276 Ahh.. Ahh..
229 00:09:58,841 00:10:02,130 Hello, my little red friend Hello, my little red friend
230 00:10:02,248 00:10:03,248 Wow, Wow,
231 00:10:03,356 00:10:07,131 Okay. It's night. Teenage girl finds a zit Okay. It's night. Teenage girl finds a zit
232 00:10:07,358 00:10:09,233 and a doozy, at that and a doozy, at that
233 00:10:09,538 00:10:12,288 Mom won't let you out this late So it's midnight run time.. Mom won't let you out this late So it's midnight run time..
234 00:10:12,304 00:10:14,324 ..for a little Benzoyl peroxide ..for a little Benzoyl peroxide
235 00:10:14,410 00:10:16,488 Kerry, you get to drive but you have to buy the cream Kerry, you get to drive but you have to buy the cream
236 00:10:16,499 00:10:19,063 'cause Pamela here can't be seen buying that kind of goop 'cause Pamela here can't be seen buying that kind of goop
237 00:10:19,074 00:10:21,375 Should I keep going, or have you heard enough? Should I keep going, or have you heard enough?
238 00:10:21,454 00:10:23,060 Where' you learn to do that? Where' you learn to do that?
239 00:10:23,102 00:10:25,664 In the army. Studying aerial photos In the army. Studying aerial photos
240 00:10:25,872 00:10:29,291 In a split second, I had to decide: Weapon of mass destruction.. In a split second, I had to decide: Weapon of mass destruction..
241 00:10:29,370 00:10:31,338 ..or just a dude ..or just a dude
242 00:10:31,581 00:10:33,424 [Cate sighs] Hi! [Cate sighs] Hi!
243 00:10:34,010 00:10:36,221 What's everydody doing out here? What's everydody doing out here?
244 00:10:36,245 00:10:38,010 [Gasps] Wha-? [Gasps] Wha-?
245 00:10:38,564 00:10:40,236 Oh, no! Oh, no!
246 00:10:40,563 00:10:42,236 What happened? What happened?
247 00:10:42,312 00:10:43,959 Ahh! I don't need this! Ahh! I don't need this!
248 00:10:44,420 00:10:45,420 Mom Mom
249 00:10:45,557 00:10:46,721 We, uh- We, uh-
250 00:10:46,760 00:10:47,760 I dit it I dit it
251 00:10:48,479 00:10:50,182 [Both] He did it! [Both] He did it!
252 00:10:50,377 00:10:51,375 You? You?
253 00:10:51,385 00:10:55,588 Yeah; Sorry, it was late last night. There was an emergency Yeah; Sorry, it was late last night. There was an emergency
254 00:10:55,674 00:10:58,635 I didn't have time to umplug my wan, so I borrowed your car I didn't have time to umplug my wan, so I borrowed your car
255 00:10:58,658 00:11:00,969 I found it! That way in the parking lot I found it! That way in the parking lot
256 00:11:00,979 00:11:04,671 And they call it a 'Gentleman's Club'. [disappointed] -C.J. And they call it a 'Gentleman's Club'. [disappointed] -C.J.
257 00:11:08,004 00:11:11,625 Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Oh, why did you do that? Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Oh, why did you do that?
258 00:11:11,636 00:11:13,683 Come on; You're family Come on; You're family
259 00:11:13,738 00:11:16,678 Blood is thicker than- Oh, my God! It's caring me! Blood is thicker than- Oh, my God! It's caring me!
260 00:11:20,543 00:11:21,871 Mom? Mom?
261 00:11:22,723 00:11:26,714 I need you to sign this; I'm kind of in trouble I need you to sign this; I'm kind of in trouble
262 00:11:27,066 00:11:28,667 What is it? What is it?
263 00:11:32,345 00:11:36,923 "Improper displays of affection in the halls, without a pass" "Improper displays of affection in the halls, without a pass"
264 00:11:37,900 00:11:40,767 What, did you kiss Missy in the hallway? What, did you kiss Missy in the hallway?
265 00:11:40,869 00:11:43,702 It wasn't Missy. It was Robin Rendell It wasn't Missy. It was Robin Rendell
266 00:11:43,717 00:11:47,272 She's always kind of had a crush on me plus I need the practice She's always kind of had a crush on me plus I need the practice
267 00:11:47,905 00:11:50,123 You needed practice kissing? You needed practice kissing?
268 00:11:50,134 00:11:53,314 You are a 14 y.o. boy. You're not supoosed to be good. You are a 14 y.o. boy. You're not supoosed to be good.
269 00:11:53,873 00:11:56,600 C.J. told me I should practice kissing lots of other girls.. C.J. told me I should practice kissing lots of other girls..
270 00:11:56,611 00:11:59,851 ..so I'd be good when I, finally, get my hands on Missy ..so I'd be good when I, finally, get my hands on Missy
271 00:11:59,866 00:12:03,514 Get your hands on-on- C.J. told you this? Get your hands on-on- C.J. told you this?
272 00:12:03,569 00:12:04,569 Yeah Yeah
273 00:12:05,077 00:12:07,387 Well; Did he also tell you that.. Well; Did he also tell you that..
274 00:12:07,398 00:12:09,903 ..you'd be having a month of saturday detentions? ..you'd be having a month of saturday detentions?
275 00:12:09,926 00:12:11,727 What? Mmmm What? Mmmm
276 00:12:11,738 00:12:14,488 Rory, give me a minute [Jim] I love that C.J. Rory, give me a minute [Jim] I love that C.J.
277 00:12:14,500 00:12:18,493 I'm gonna shout it from the rooftops I'm gonna shout it from the rooftops
278 00:12:18,908 00:12:22,923 Now, look, dad; We haven't heard C.J.'s side of the story Now, look, dad; We haven't heard C.J.'s side of the story
279 00:12:22,947 00:12:26,608 And, when we do, then we can wring his scrawny little neck And, when we do, then we can wring his scrawny little neck
280 00:12:26,619 00:12:29,546 You know, it's one thing to give someone, the benefit of the doubt You know, it's one thing to give someone, the benefit of the doubt
281 00:12:29,556 00:12:32,496 But, I cannot stand when a member of my own family.. But, I cannot stand when a member of my own family..
282 00:12:32,507 00:12:35,966 ..is lying straight to my face -[Bridget wimpering] ..is lying straight to my face -[Bridget wimpering]
283 00:12:37,107 00:12:40,638 She was just practicing her scared pose. Good one, Brig'! She was just practicing her scared pose. Good one, Brig'!
284 00:12:41,670 00:12:44,337 [Bridget breathing heavily] [Kerry] What's wrong with you?! [Bridget breathing heavily] [Kerry] What's wrong with you?!
285 00:12:44,348 00:12:46,262 Kerry, she knows! She knows everything! Kerry, she knows! She knows everything!
286 00:12:46,273 00:12:49,795 I can't take this anymore! I've to confess right now!! I can't take this anymore! I've to confess right now!!
287 00:12:49,806 00:12:52,264 Stop it! You're being histerical! I can't -ohh Stop it! You're being histerical! I can't -ohh
288 00:12:52,275 00:12:53,275 Uh! Uh!
289 00:12:54,056 00:12:55,056 Ow! Quit it! Ow! Quit it!
290 00:12:55,442 00:12:58,473 [arguing] Auhh! Okay, calm down, Bridget! [arguing] Auhh! Okay, calm down, Bridget!
291 00:12:59,119 00:13:00,260 Bridget!! Bridget!!
292 00:13:00,271 00:13:01,307 You're being paranoid! You're being paranoid!
293 00:13:01,318 00:13:03,182 No, I'm not; Didn't you hear her? She said: .. No, I'm not; Didn't you hear her? She said: ..
294 00:13:03,193 00:13:05,525 .."I can't stand a family member lying to my face"! .."I can't stand a family member lying to my face"!
295 00:13:05,536 00:13:07,432 Look; If mom knew we took out the car Look; If mom knew we took out the car
296 00:13:07,448 00:13:09,447 Why wouldn't she just come out and say something? Why wouldn't she just come out and say something?
297 00:13:09,469 00:13:11,723 Because she is toying with us Because she is toying with us
298 00:13:11,942 00:13:13,938 She wants us to come clean She wants us to come clean
299 00:13:13,949 00:13:15,823 but all we keep doing is lying but all we keep doing is lying
300 00:13:15,833 00:13:17,614 and... Aow!! and... Aow!!
301 00:13:19,966 00:13:22,926 [Music playing in the van] [Music playing in the van]
302 00:13:24,396 00:13:26,513 [C.J.] Hey, hey, come on in, man [C.J.] Hey, hey, come on in, man
303 00:13:27,933 00:13:30,260 Grab a seat in the bed [water bed sound] Grab a seat in the bed [water bed sound]
304 00:13:30,271 00:13:31,862 Hey! Oh! - Woww.. Hey! Oh! - Woww..
305 00:13:31,873 00:13:34,060 I ought to mess you up, man I ought to mess you up, man
306 00:13:34,092 00:13:36,568 It's really hard to be taken seriously on this stupid bed It's really hard to be taken seriously on this stupid bed
307 00:13:36,592 00:13:38,146 Yeah; Tell me about it Yeah; Tell me about it
308 00:13:38,157 00:13:39,357 This isn't funny This isn't funny
309 00:13:39,397 00:13:42,337 I took your stupid advice and kissed Robin Rendell I took your stupid advice and kissed Robin Rendell
310 00:13:42,358 00:13:44,060 Oh, yeah? How'd it go? Oh, yeah? How'd it go?
311 00:13:44,272 00:13:45,966 She said I opened my mouth too wide She said I opened my mouth too wide
312 00:13:45,983 00:13:47,607 Uhh .. Ha .. Ha, rookie mistake Uhh .. Ha .. Ha, rookie mistake
313 00:13:47,631 00:13:49,998 She said it was like sticking her face in a bucket She said it was like sticking her face in a bucket
314 00:13:50,014 00:13:52,327 If I had a nickel- The point is..!! If I had a nickel- The point is..!!
315 00:13:52,338 00:13:54,400 ..then, Missy found out I kissed someone else ..then, Missy found out I kissed someone else
316 00:13:54,411 00:13:56,299 and told me I could forget about the dance and told me I could forget about the dance
317 00:13:56,309 00:13:59,317 she said she wouldn't kiss me if I were the last guy on Earth she said she wouldn't kiss me if I were the last guy on Earth
318 00:13:59,338 00:14:02,840 Rory, "I wouldn't kiss you if you were the last guy on Earth" Rory, "I wouldn't kiss you if you were the last guy on Earth"
319 00:14:02,862 00:14:05,635 is a rite of passage. Every guy hears that at some point is a rite of passage. Every guy hears that at some point
320 00:14:05,675 00:14:08,471 It's like: "You are old and gross" It's like: "You are old and gross"
321 00:14:08,550 00:14:11,307 "Ferrari doesn't make vans" "Ferrari doesn't make vans"
322 00:14:11,440 00:14:16,264 "So help me God, take one more step I'll bash your head in with this rock", C'n! "So help me God, take one more step I'll bash your head in with this rock", C'n!
323 00:14:16,311 00:14:18,321 You don't understand. Now, Missy will probably.. You don't understand. Now, Missy will probably..
324 00:14:18,332 00:14:20,174 ..hook up with someone else at the dance.. ..hook up with someone else at the dance..
325 00:14:20,185 00:14:22,348 ..and forget all about me ..and forget all about me
326 00:14:22,442 00:14:25,744 Ahh, Come here, Look Rory Ahh, Come here, Look Rory
327 00:14:26,002 00:14:28,783 I'm really, really sorry that happened to you, pal I'm really, really sorry that happened to you, pal
328 00:14:29,291 00:14:32,002 But I kinda got to get moving But I kinda got to get moving
329 00:14:32,013 00:14:34,018 Well; What do I do about Missy? Well; What do I do about Missy?
330 00:14:34,049 00:14:35,681 Can we talk about it after the concert? Can we talk about it after the concert?
331 00:14:35,691 00:14:37,507 Or actually, maybe in a couple of days Or actually, maybe in a couple of days
332 00:14:37,517 00:14:39,485 'cause tonight's gonna be really great 'cause tonight's gonna be really great
333 00:14:39,495 00:14:42,695 and this conversations seems like it's got 'Buzz killer' written all over it, and this conversations seems like it's got 'Buzz killer' written all over it,
334 00:14:42,706 00:14:46,861 but I'm gonna snag you a light skick. How about that? -Right but I'm gonna snag you a light skick. How about that? -Right
335 00:14:53,994 00:14:55,361 Rory!! Rory!!
336 00:14:56,283 00:15:00,246 Come on, man. We'll talk on the way to the show Come on, man. We'll talk on the way to the show
337 00:15:07,620 00:15:10,020 Where's Rory? Hey Cate. Where's Rory? Hey Cate.
338 00:15:10,062 00:15:12,302 Where's Rory? Where's Rory?
339 00:15:13,042 00:15:15,058 He's coming; He's in the van. He's coming; He's in the van.
340 00:15:15,069 00:15:17,488 You told Rory that he could get a girl to like him.. You told Rory that he could get a girl to like him..
341 00:15:17,499 00:15:20,164 ..by practicing kissing on another girl? ..by practicing kissing on another girl?
342 00:15:20,501 00:15:23,077 I told him to practice, but I meant like.. I told him to practice, but I meant like..
343 00:15:23,101 00:15:26,850 ..on his hand, or in the mirror... on plush toys ..on his hand, or in the mirror... on plush toys
344 00:15:27,374 00:15:28,870 You kiss plush toys? You kiss plush toys?
345 00:15:28,880 00:15:31,231 No, you kiss plush toys No, you kiss plush toys
346 00:15:31,247 00:15:32,988 You know, C.J., ehm.. You know, C.J., ehm..
347 00:15:33,093 00:15:34,587 I gave you a chance I gave you a chance
348 00:15:34,597 00:15:37,316 because I thought maybe you had matured because I thought maybe you had matured
349 00:15:37,974 00:15:39,576 but it's become pretty obvious but it's become pretty obvious
350 00:15:39,587 00:15:41,490 that we were just another place to crash that we were just another place to crash
351 00:15:41,501 00:15:44,189 while you followed 'Aerosmith' on their tour -Buff while you followed 'Aerosmith' on their tour -Buff
352 00:15:47,118 00:15:49,868 I'm afraid I'm gonna have to ask you to leave I'm afraid I'm gonna have to ask you to leave
353 00:15:51,212 00:15:53,575 Wow, Ouch. Wow, Ouch.
354 00:15:54,787 00:15:56,614 Some birthday Some birthday
355 00:15:57,427 00:15:59,959 Now ask him for my money Now ask him for my money
356 00:16:00,178 00:16:01,521 Dad, please... Dad, please...
357 00:16:01,811 00:16:03,491 Hi mom! Hi, Mrs. Hennessy! Hi mom! Hi, Mrs. Hennessy!
358 00:16:03,678 00:16:04,678 Hi Missy! Hi Missy!
359 00:16:05,029 00:16:07,474 Did I tell you, you could go to a concert? Did I tell you, you could go to a concert?
360 00:16:07,506 00:16:09,539 I didn't. I went to the school dance. - What?! I didn't. I went to the school dance. - What?!
361 00:16:09,563 00:16:11,781 Oh, rory was so cute; He came in, brought me a rose Oh, rory was so cute; He came in, brought me a rose
362 00:16:11,805 00:16:13,867 I felt just like the bachelorette I felt just like the bachelorette
363 00:16:15,347 00:16:18,479 C.J. drove me there. I was too scared to go in C.J. drove me there. I was too scared to go in
364 00:16:18,519 00:16:20,269 Then he convinced me I should Then he convinced me I should
365 00:16:20,300 00:16:22,784 When I got there, she looked so pretty, I got butterflies- When I got there, she looked so pretty, I got butterflies-
366 00:16:22,801 00:16:24,800 Eh - steady Eh - steady
367 00:16:25,973 00:16:26,973 Right. Right.
368 00:16:28,317 00:16:30,184 Sorry you missed your 'Aerosmith Concert' Sorry you missed your 'Aerosmith Concert'
369 00:16:30,223 00:16:32,223 It's cool. [Cate] -You didn't go? It's cool. [Cate] -You didn't go?
370 00:16:32,234 00:16:34,167 Anyway, I'm gonna walk Missy home Anyway, I'm gonna walk Missy home
371 00:16:34,177 00:16:37,575 Hey, don't you two take french class ..together?! -Shhh.. Hey, don't you two take french class ..together?! -Shhh..
372 00:16:39,763 00:16:42,431 Wow, I cant't believe you gave up your concert Wow, I cant't believe you gave up your concert
373 00:16:42,442 00:16:43,864 It's no biggie It's no biggie
374 00:16:46,018 00:16:49,568 Wow, these are really good seats -Yeah, yeah Wow, these are really good seats -Yeah, yeah
375 00:16:49,896 00:16:53,427 No, no, I mean, incredible seats -Yeah, Thank you. No, no, I mean, incredible seats -Yeah, Thank you.
376 00:16:54,349 00:16:56,183 Yeah; Well, it has been fun. Yeah; Well, it has been fun.
377 00:16:56,233 00:16:59,533 Why don't you drop by when you can stay a little longer? Why don't you drop by when you can stay a little longer?
378 00:17:02,530 00:17:03,951 Look.. Look..
379 00:17:04,569 00:17:07,857 I may have worn out my welcome here a little bit.. I may have worn out my welcome here a little bit..
380 00:17:07,886 00:17:09,811 ..and I'm sorry. ..and I'm sorry.
381 00:17:10,459 00:17:12,771 And I don't want to sound cheesy but.. And I don't want to sound cheesy but..
382 00:17:12,787 00:17:17,521 I just always wanted to be part of a family like yours. I just always wanted to be part of a family like yours.
383 00:17:18,021 00:17:20,771 I just kind of like hanging out with you guys I just kind of like hanging out with you guys
384 00:17:20,795 00:17:24,090 Oh, well; That was kind of sweet. - Yeah; Oh, well; That was kind of sweet. - Yeah;
385 00:17:24,140 00:17:27,093 Can you take me driving? Can you take me driving?
386 00:17:27,215 00:17:30,668 I'm sorry. That just slipped out. That, that really was sweet. I'm sorry. That just slipped out. That, that really was sweet.
387 00:17:30,708 00:17:32,687 Now, wait one damn minute here.. Now, wait one damn minute here..
388 00:17:32,711 00:17:35,499 ..before we all soften up like a bunch of pansies. ..before we all soften up like a bunch of pansies.
389 00:17:35,562 00:17:38,462 You look me in the eye and you tell me the truth You look me in the eye and you tell me the truth
390 00:17:38,488 00:17:43,000 Why did it take so long to come pay your respects to your uncle Paul? Why did it take so long to come pay your respects to your uncle Paul?
391 00:17:43,011 00:17:45,898 C.J.; Be honest for once C.J.; Be honest for once
392 00:17:49,719 00:17:51,906 I was ashamed I was ashamed
393 00:17:53,331 00:17:56,669 You know, he was the only guy who said I'd be somebody You know, he was the only guy who said I'd be somebody
394 00:17:56,680 00:17:58,351 I never was I never was
395 00:17:58,937 00:18:02,338 I almost calle him one time when I was running 'The Tilt-A-Wirl', but.. I almost calle him one time when I was running 'The Tilt-A-Wirl', but..
396 00:18:02,349 00:18:04,572 ..all the parents freaked out 'cause I was dialing.. ..all the parents freaked out 'cause I was dialing..
397 00:18:04,583 00:18:07,456 ..instead of 'paying attention' to their kids! ..instead of 'paying attention' to their kids!
398 00:18:07,466 00:18:09,896 I'll get out of your air I'll get out of your air
399 00:18:10,255 00:18:13,989 - Where are you gonna go? - Thought I might see my parents - Where are you gonna go? - Thought I might see my parents
400 00:18:14,010 00:18:16,005 I thought they weren't talking to you I thought they weren't talking to you
401 00:18:16,016 00:18:18,250 I meant from a distance I meant from a distance
402 00:18:19,969 00:18:23,786 I could re-up in the Army Oh, Wait; There's a war I could re-up in the Army Oh, Wait; There's a war
403 00:18:25,677 00:18:28,470 Technically, I don't know where I'm going, so... Technically, I don't know where I'm going, so...
404 00:18:28,510 00:18:30,173 I'll be fine I'll be fine
405 00:18:30,993 00:18:32,728 All alone All alone
406 00:18:33,213 00:18:35,611 Me and my little space heater Me and my little space heater
407 00:18:35,713 00:18:38,384 That's my space heater That's my space heater
408 00:18:38,400 00:18:40,134 C.J. wait C.J. wait
409 00:18:41,260 00:18:45,505 Look, the truth is this family doesn'n really know Look, the truth is this family doesn'n really know
410 00:18:45,516 00:18:47,992 where it's going, either where it's going, either
411 00:18:48,352 00:18:50,226 So.. [Sighs] So.. [Sighs]
412 00:18:50,672 00:18:52,735 Why don't you stay a little while? Why don't you stay a little while?
413 00:18:55,028 00:18:57,622 In the driveway In the driveway
414 00:18:59,418 00:19:02,559 All right. Until you can figure stuff out All right. Until you can figure stuff out
415 00:19:03,411 00:19:07,324 Can I have a key to the dead bolt? -No!! Can I have a key to the dead bolt? -No!!
416 00:19:07,902 00:19:10,239 And, yet, you know, C.J. I have to say And, yet, you know, C.J. I have to say
417 00:19:10,250 00:19:12,906 it's so nice to see the real you it's so nice to see the real you
418 00:19:13,044 00:19:15,944 If there's one thing we value in this household.. If there's one thing we value in this household..
419 00:19:15,956 00:19:18,909 ..it's the truth; Honesty, honesty, honesty- ..it's the truth; Honesty, honesty, honesty-
420 00:19:18,920 00:19:23,551 Okay, mother! Stop it! Just stop your mind games right now!! -What?!! Okay, mother! Stop it! Just stop your mind games right now!! -What?!!
421 00:19:23,587 00:19:24,821 Shut up, shut up, shut up! Shut up, shut up, shut up!
422 00:19:24,832 00:19:27,009 I did it! I put the dent in the car. It was my foult! I did it! I put the dent in the car. It was my foult!
423 00:19:27,020 00:19:28,243 - Nooo!! - Yes! - Nooo!! - Yes!
424 00:19:28,254 00:19:29,270 Yes!! Yes!!
425 00:19:29,281 00:19:30,560 I had to get zit cream one night.. I had to get zit cream one night..
426 00:19:30,570 00:19:32,613 ..and she wouldn't go with me unless she could drive.. ..and she wouldn't go with me unless she could drive..
427 00:19:32,624 00:19:35,103 ..so, she put the dent in the car, then C.J. took the blame for us ..so, she put the dent in the car, then C.J. took the blame for us
428 00:19:35,113 00:19:39,021 - What? - Ohh! I feel so much better - What? - Ohh! I feel so much better
429 00:19:39,032 00:19:42,178 Thank you for telling me to be honest. Good night! Thank you for telling me to be honest. Good night!
430 00:19:42,194 00:19:43,748 What? Wait ..one minute! What? Wait ..one minute!
431 00:19:43,772 00:19:46,974 You snuck out at night and you drove?!! You snuck out at night and you drove?!!
432 00:19:46,991 00:19:48,803 You don't even have a license..and.. You don't even have a license..and..
433 00:19:48,814 00:19:50,794 And you covered for the whole thing?! And you covered for the whole thing?!
434 00:19:50,805 00:19:54,011 All right, okay! Everybody mass groundings All right, okay! Everybody mass groundings
435 00:19:54,287 00:19:57,524 You are not the boss of me! You are not the boss of me!
436 00:19:58,962 00:20:01,149 Oh, you mean those two? That's cool. Oh, you mean those two? That's cool.
437 00:20:04,342 00:20:06,154 And you just asked him to stay. And you just asked him to stay.
438 00:20:12,615 00:20:14,456 - Well, I, uh... - Oh... - Well, I, uh... - Oh...
439 00:20:24,507 00:20:28,006 Wow, Rory, where'd you learn how to kiss like that? Wow, Rory, where'd you learn how to kiss like that?
440 00:20:28,522 00:20:29,955 My cousin My cousin
441 00:20:29,966 00:20:31,752 Your cousin? Ew!! Your cousin? Ew!!
442 00:20:32,095 00:20:34,566 - Ow! - Wait!! No, It's not like it seems!! - Ow! - Wait!! No, It's not like it seems!!
443 00:20:34,582 00:20:36,825 My cousin's the guy!! My cousin's the guy!!
444 00:20:38,324 00:20:42,167 ---oOo--- ---oOo---