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00:00:06,006 --> 00:00:07,465
[upbeat music playing]
2
00:00:07,549 --> 00:00:11,594
A NETFLIX SERIES
3
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[Elvira] Come on, Blondie! No mercy!
4
00:00:14,806 --> 00:00:16,766
[whines] Oh my God. [sighs]
5
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Okay.
6
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[upbeat music playing from speaker]
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[breathing heavily]
8
00:00:25,775 --> 00:00:26,775
[exhales]
9
00:00:27,944 --> 00:00:28,944
[Tina] What is that?
10
00:00:30,030 --> 00:00:31,030
[Silvia exhales]
11
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[Silvia grunts]
12
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Come on! Make us sweat it out, Blondie!
13
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[chuckles]
14
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[Silvia grunts]
15
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- Om! Shanti, shanti, shanti, shanti. Om!
- [clapping]
16
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[all] Whoo!
17
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[whispers] Oh, we have to pay.
18
00:00:50,800 --> 00:00:52,135
[whimsical music playing]
19
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[gasps]
20
00:01:01,478 --> 00:01:03,104
- [whistling]
- [cheering]
21
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Let's go.
22
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[whimsical music continues playing]
23
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They thought I was begging.
24
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Like... [inhales]
25
00:01:13,198 --> 00:01:14,866
I was happy working out by myself,
26
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when all of a sudden,
everybody started chasing me.
27
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Like a hoard of zombies.
28
00:01:19,496 --> 00:01:21,539
And out of nowhere, they gave me coins.
29
00:01:21,623 --> 00:01:22,832
[whimpers]
30
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They thought I was a beggar
or something like that.
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No homeless people wear Lululemon,
you know what I mean?
32
00:01:29,047 --> 00:01:31,966
Diego, I know we're going
through a rough patch...
33
00:01:32,759 --> 00:01:34,385
but we don't need their charity.
34
00:01:34,469 --> 00:01:36,888
They were probably thinking
it was just a class or something.
35
00:01:36,971 --> 00:01:39,011
And they were paying you
for being their instructor.
36
00:01:39,057 --> 00:01:40,809
Is that a teacher's salary?
37
00:01:41,518 --> 00:01:44,158
- No wonder they're always on strike.
- [Diego] Don't you see, Sil?
38
00:01:44,187 --> 00:01:47,148
You can charge for your sessions
to pay for important things.
39
00:01:47,774 --> 00:01:50,068
Like... waxing.
40
00:01:50,151 --> 00:01:52,028
[gasps] Or buying a car.
41
00:01:52,112 --> 00:01:53,113
Mm-hmm.
42
00:01:54,489 --> 00:01:57,534
[Tina] Now that Blondie
has made exercising so fashionable here,
43
00:01:57,617 --> 00:01:59,160
I'm gonna sell my weight-loss shakes.
44
00:01:59,244 --> 00:02:01,871
When I sold them in Juarez,
my shakes were such a big hit.
45
00:02:01,955 --> 00:02:03,081
Well, how about that?
46
00:02:03,164 --> 00:02:05,416
No need to exercise and get all sweaty.
47
00:02:05,500 --> 00:02:07,127
But exercising is good for your health.
48
00:02:07,210 --> 00:02:09,254
Listen,
exercising only makes you more hungry.
49
00:02:09,337 --> 00:02:12,173
And that's why my milkshakes
will be such a success.
50
00:02:12,257 --> 00:02:14,257
You will lose wight extra fast
with Ex-Piggy Forte.
51
00:02:14,300 --> 00:02:15,468
[Dolores] Here we go.
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00:02:16,719 --> 00:02:17,554
That's it.
53
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[upbeat music playing from speaker]
54
00:02:19,722 --> 00:02:21,182
Wow. Look.
55
00:02:21,266 --> 00:02:23,977
- [gasps] Hi, handsome! Hey.
- [whistles]
56
00:02:24,060 --> 00:02:25,979
[chuckles]
57
00:02:27,147 --> 00:02:28,773
Hello there.
58
00:02:29,399 --> 00:02:31,151
What's up, Netito? Huh?
59
00:02:31,234 --> 00:02:34,195
All this time, you never mentioned
that you can dance so well.
60
00:02:34,863 --> 00:02:37,240
But you kind of look like a blowfish.
[whistles]
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00:02:37,824 --> 00:02:40,034
These shorts are giving me a wedgie.
62
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[sucks teeth] Ah!
63
00:02:41,452 --> 00:02:42,829
That's no big deal, man.
64
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But be careful with the consequences.
They can be a real doozie.
65
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You know what I mean, prostate trouble.
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00:02:48,960 --> 00:02:51,045
Peeing in little squirts
all through the night.
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00:02:51,129 --> 00:02:53,089
- And no more stiffies.
- [gasps]
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00:02:53,173 --> 00:02:55,300
Nothing to worry about, Neto.
Unless, you know...
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00:02:55,383 --> 00:02:57,051
Unless you've felt The Spear.
70
00:02:57,135 --> 00:02:58,553
What's The Spear?
71
00:02:58,636 --> 00:03:01,556
It's a pain that starts all the way
at the top of Mount Blackburn
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all the way to the Grand Canyon.
73
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Get it?
74
00:03:04,267 --> 00:03:06,936
You know, from the tip of your pecker
all the way to your rectum.
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I've felt that, though!
76
00:03:08,104 --> 00:03:09,189
- No kidding.
- Yes.
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00:03:09,272 --> 00:03:10,481
- Seriously?
- Yes!
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00:03:10,565 --> 00:03:13,276
Hey, I'd get a check-up if I were you
because you're still early.
79
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I saw terrible things in prison
from lack in medical care.
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[inhales]
81
00:03:18,406 --> 00:03:19,741
You have no idea.
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00:03:21,242 --> 00:03:22,785
[Crista] I'm really stressed.
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00:03:22,869 --> 00:03:27,123
Last week we had 13,000 Toxifans,
and now we're down to 11,500.
84
00:03:27,207 --> 00:03:29,292
We have to post juicy stuff, Pablo.
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00:03:29,876 --> 00:03:32,462
They're all saying
that this is a fake relationship.
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Did you read the comments?
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[phone chimes]
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"This relationship is faker
than Luisito Comunica's cool trips."
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[phone chimes]
90
00:03:40,637 --> 00:03:43,932
"You know coffee and vanilla don't mix.
They're obviously lying."
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[scoffs] What's wrong with them?
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00:03:45,725 --> 00:03:46,809
Wait a minute.
93
00:03:46,893 --> 00:03:49,938
We have to do something to prove
that we're actually dating for real.
94
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Day what?
95
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[scoffs]
96
00:03:52,440 --> 00:03:54,359
Hey, wait! Please, Crista.
97
00:03:54,442 --> 00:03:55,442
Hold on.
98
00:03:56,527 --> 00:03:59,215
I feel like there's something wrong
in our relationship, and I want...
99
00:03:59,239 --> 00:04:01,074
Whoa, whoa. Hold your horses.
100
00:04:02,700 --> 00:04:06,204
We don't have a relationship.
We're just fucking.
101
00:04:06,788 --> 00:04:09,415
- But we've done it more than three times.
- So what?
102
00:04:09,499 --> 00:04:11,751
We could be dating officially now.
103
00:04:11,834 --> 00:04:14,003
You can put me to the test. I'll prove it.
104
00:04:14,837 --> 00:04:18,383
Okay. Only so you realize that labels
aren't as good as they seem.
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00:04:20,260 --> 00:04:22,512
[Silvia] Don't you give up! Nine, ten...
106
00:04:22,595 --> 00:04:23,429
LOSE WEIGHT
$150
107
00:04:23,513 --> 00:04:25,723
...eleven, twelve! Keep going!
108
00:04:25,807 --> 00:04:28,685
Now, kick up and clap under your leg
to work those obliques.
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00:04:28,768 --> 00:04:31,562
One, two! Energize! Three,
110
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four, five, six...
111
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- Come on, ladies! Stop your suffering!
- ...seven!
112
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I have the quick solution
113
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to get rid of those love handles
just like that!
114
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- Ex-Piggy Forte right this way.
- [Silvia] Hey.
115
00:04:42,573 --> 00:04:44,909
Please! All these powders
are just a big scam.
116
00:04:44,993 --> 00:04:47,870
If you want to lose weight,
you have to exercise.
117
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Easy. No pain, no gain.
118
00:04:49,706 --> 00:04:51,749
This is what Anahí from the band RBD uses...
119
00:04:51,833 --> 00:04:54,502
- [scoffs]
- ...to stay oh so very slim.
120
00:04:54,585 --> 00:04:56,296
Are you serious? For real?
121
00:04:56,379 --> 00:04:58,423
Don't believe me? Let's bet on it.
122
00:04:59,007 --> 00:05:02,927
Elvira will drink my special milkshakes,
and Lulú will work out with you.
123
00:05:03,011 --> 00:05:05,555
The one whose client
loses more weight wins.
124
00:05:05,638 --> 00:05:07,515
Perfect. But if I win,
125
00:05:07,598 --> 00:05:10,143
I want the whole clothesline to myself.
126
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I hate sharing with strangers.
127
00:05:11,811 --> 00:05:12,937
And if I win,
128
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you're gonna wash
my family's underwear by hand.
129
00:05:15,690 --> 00:05:17,066
[sighs]
130
00:05:17,150 --> 00:05:17,984
Fine.
131
00:05:18,067 --> 00:05:21,321
No, wait a minute. You can count me out.
132
00:05:21,404 --> 00:05:22,780
Don't you wanna look like Anahí?
133
00:05:23,364 --> 00:05:25,908
No, I'd rather be curvy like Galilea.
134
00:05:26,451 --> 00:05:28,745
My husband likes to have
something to grab onto.
135
00:05:28,828 --> 00:05:30,955
Oh, did I say Anahí? No, no.
136
00:05:31,039 --> 00:05:32,623
Gali. Scrumptious.
137
00:05:32,707 --> 00:05:35,501
Ah! In that case, I'm in. [chuckles]
138
00:05:35,585 --> 00:05:36,585
Good. And you?
139
00:05:37,045 --> 00:05:39,756
If I do your routines
will I look like Maribel Guardia?
140
00:05:39,839 --> 00:05:42,008
Oh, you'll look like Scarlett Johansson.
141
00:05:43,384 --> 00:05:44,469
Kim Kardashian?
142
00:05:45,470 --> 00:05:46,888
Okay, like Maribel what's-her-face?
143
00:05:47,847 --> 00:05:49,223
That's great. [chuckles] I'm in.
144
00:05:49,307 --> 00:05:50,683
- Oh, good. Yeah.
- Yeah.
145
00:05:51,559 --> 00:05:53,644
But wait,
we won't get sick or anything, will we?
146
00:05:53,728 --> 00:05:55,313
No.
147
00:05:55,396 --> 00:05:57,106
- You'll see.
- Mmm.
148
00:05:57,899 --> 00:05:58,733
[Neto] Hi, Rigo.
149
00:05:58,816 --> 00:05:59,816
Listen.
150
00:06:00,401 --> 00:06:02,401
Do you know where I can get a check-up?
You know...
151
00:06:02,445 --> 00:06:05,698
- Yes.
- For my, you know, heart! My prostate.
152
00:06:05,782 --> 00:06:07,617
Shh! Shh! Shh!
153
00:06:08,117 --> 00:06:09,702
Don't ever say that word again.
154
00:06:10,328 --> 00:06:12,389
Business will drop
if any of my lady clients find out
155
00:06:12,413 --> 00:06:15,083
that someone stuck their hand
in your prostate.
156
00:06:15,166 --> 00:06:17,251
- But it's for my health.
- I don't care.
157
00:06:17,335 --> 00:06:18,695
My brother Ramón used to say that,
158
00:06:20,171 --> 00:06:21,798
and now he goes by Simona.
159
00:06:21,881 --> 00:06:24,217
Besides, the only man
who can check you is Mr. Inocencio,
160
00:06:24,300 --> 00:06:26,803
but he has a big mouth.
Especially when he's drunk.
161
00:06:27,387 --> 00:06:28,387
Seriously?
162
00:06:28,429 --> 00:06:30,556
You know why I never greet Mrs. Socorro
with a kiss?
163
00:06:30,640 --> 00:06:32,058
- Mm-mm.
- She has herpes.
164
00:06:32,141 --> 00:06:36,187
Mr. Rotulio never goes to the water park
because he has a fungus.
165
00:06:37,355 --> 00:06:38,523
Okay, okay!
166
00:06:38,606 --> 00:06:41,567
In that case, we have to do something
about these skimpy shorts. Please!
167
00:06:45,530 --> 00:06:46,656
[groans]
168
00:06:46,739 --> 00:06:47,949
Step on the scales.
169
00:06:49,325 --> 00:06:50,493
Hey, hey, hey!
170
00:06:50,576 --> 00:06:52,161
- Wait just a minute.
- [Lulú] What?
171
00:06:52,245 --> 00:06:54,497
- She's got extra weight on.
- Hey, hey, hey.
172
00:06:54,580 --> 00:06:55,580
[scoffs]
173
00:06:57,166 --> 00:06:58,501
Hey, you too.
174
00:06:58,584 --> 00:07:00,503
No cheating. Come on, take it off.
175
00:07:00,586 --> 00:07:02,755
- But I don't...
- Fair is fair. Come on, let's go.
176
00:07:09,137 --> 00:07:10,179
[Elvira sighs]
177
00:07:14,767 --> 00:07:17,186
All right, let the Hunger Games begin.
178
00:07:17,937 --> 00:07:18,937
[sighs]
179
00:07:19,439 --> 00:07:21,023
[Pablo] Do you think this will work?
180
00:07:21,107 --> 00:07:24,360
Of course. All couples post
pictures doing yoga together.
181
00:07:24,444 --> 00:07:25,278
[groans] Ow, ow!
182
00:07:25,361 --> 00:07:27,029
Okay. This one's easier.
183
00:07:27,113 --> 00:07:28,739
[meditation music playing]
184
00:07:28,823 --> 00:07:29,823
Okay.
185
00:07:30,825 --> 00:07:32,368
- [grunts] Ouch, ouch, ouch.
- Fuck.
186
00:07:33,244 --> 00:07:35,079
We have to go with plan B.
187
00:07:35,163 --> 00:07:36,414
Aw, are you sure about that?
188
00:07:38,666 --> 00:07:40,042
DOLORES FONDA
189
00:07:45,923 --> 00:07:49,260
- [gasps]
- Mom, stop distracting the champion.
190
00:07:49,343 --> 00:07:51,387
I'm just putting
her willpower to the test.
191
00:07:51,471 --> 00:07:55,099
Here. Prove to us that your willpower
is bigger than your hunger.
192
00:07:55,183 --> 00:07:56,726
[sighs]
193
00:08:00,688 --> 00:08:01,856
[gulps]
194
00:08:03,941 --> 00:08:05,151
Yuck, it tastes like glue.
195
00:08:05,234 --> 00:08:08,696
Come on, let her have a tamale
to wash down the glue. Don't be so mean.
196
00:08:08,779 --> 00:08:11,782
Mom. Instead of giving her ideas,
help me egg her on. Let's go.
197
00:08:11,866 --> 00:08:13,117
- [sighs]
- That's it, Elvira.
198
00:08:13,201 --> 00:08:14,452
Swallow, swallow, Elvira!
199
00:08:14,535 --> 00:08:15,745
Swallow, swallow, Elvira!
200
00:08:15,828 --> 00:08:17,955
No, don't... don't spit it back up.
Come on, drink it!
201
00:08:18,039 --> 00:08:19,516
- [Silvia] No groaning.
- [Lulú groans]
202
00:08:19,540 --> 00:08:21,180
[Silvia] Listen, being skinny isn't easy.
203
00:08:21,250 --> 00:08:22,376
[groans]
204
00:08:23,044 --> 00:08:24,462
I don't think I can go on.
205
00:08:24,545 --> 00:08:26,839
No, no, no. Wait. Listen to me.
Hey, look here.
206
00:08:27,632 --> 00:08:29,509
I'm not losing this challenge, okay?
207
00:08:30,009 --> 00:08:31,385
- You have to go on.
- [sighs]
208
00:08:31,469 --> 00:08:34,680
I'm sorry. I'm just way too weak for this.
209
00:08:35,640 --> 00:08:38,267
Look, I promise you
that if you lose weight,
210
00:08:38,351 --> 00:08:40,561
you're gonna look so gorgeous.
211
00:08:40,645 --> 00:08:41,687
Pinky promise.
212
00:08:41,771 --> 00:08:45,316
Fine, but if I win, do you promise
I can borrow one of your expensive dresses
213
00:08:45,399 --> 00:08:47,079
and try to get into the Soap Opera Awards?
214
00:08:47,151 --> 00:08:49,403
- [whimsical music playing]
- Um...
215
00:08:49,487 --> 00:08:50,947
I don't know what that is, but yes.
216
00:08:51,030 --> 00:08:53,324
So I can be up close and personal
with Sebastián Ruli.
217
00:08:53,407 --> 00:08:54,408
Ah!
218
00:08:54,492 --> 00:08:57,620
Okay. But you know I'm a size two,
so that means...
219
00:08:57,703 --> 00:08:59,372
you have a lot of work to do.
220
00:09:00,039 --> 00:09:02,542
- Up!
- This is for you, Ruli!
221
00:09:03,751 --> 00:09:05,169
- Cheer up! Let's go!
- Yes!
222
00:09:05,253 --> 00:09:07,964
- Smile! Smile! Smile! That's it!
- [groans]
223
00:09:15,721 --> 00:09:18,015
[Rigo] No, no, no, no. This isn't working.
224
00:09:18,099 --> 00:09:21,936
Yesterday they wanted to hire you
for three bachelorette parties.
225
00:09:22,019 --> 00:09:23,563
They were all married women.
226
00:09:23,646 --> 00:09:25,566
- Sorry. Change back into your shorts.
- [groans]
227
00:09:25,648 --> 00:09:27,233
What's up? [chuckles]
228
00:09:27,316 --> 00:09:30,278
- Is the chicken coop dead or what?
- It'll come back to life.
229
00:09:30,361 --> 00:09:32,196
- As soon as Neto changes.
- [Neto groans]
230
00:09:32,280 --> 00:09:33,614
Don't be that way, Rigo.
231
00:09:33,698 --> 00:09:35,866
Let the chickens die,
but don't choke the cock.
232
00:09:35,950 --> 00:09:38,494
If the chicken coop dies,
so does the business.
233
00:09:38,578 --> 00:09:41,330
So, the cock will have to suck it up.
234
00:09:41,414 --> 00:09:43,916
Okay, let me try one day
with this uniform.
235
00:09:44,417 --> 00:09:46,669
And if I don't sell, I'll change back.
236
00:09:46,752 --> 00:09:49,589
Okay, fine.
But you know what lady clients like.
237
00:09:50,256 --> 00:09:51,256
Cock.
238
00:09:56,429 --> 00:09:58,514
[Tere] This is an exquisite tripe stew!
239
00:09:58,598 --> 00:09:59,682
If we're going to date,
240
00:09:59,765 --> 00:10:02,935
you have to eat everything
my grandmother makes at her diner, okay?
241
00:10:03,019 --> 00:10:04,604
So, get used to it.
242
00:10:05,438 --> 00:10:06,772
Hey, what's wrong, young man?
243
00:10:07,565 --> 00:10:09,358
Don't you want to try my tripe stew?
244
00:10:09,442 --> 00:10:11,193
[inhales] Oh, of course I do, ma'am.
245
00:10:11,277 --> 00:10:12,778
Let me see.
246
00:10:21,203 --> 00:10:22,663
- [Dolores] So?
- This is delicious!
247
00:10:22,747 --> 00:10:24,206
- [Dolores] Is It?
- Mm-hmm.
248
00:10:24,290 --> 00:10:27,084
See, dear? He really knows how to eat,
249
00:10:27,710 --> 00:10:29,837
unlike you who turned out to be a heathen.
250
00:10:29,920 --> 00:10:31,088
Vegan.
251
00:10:31,172 --> 00:10:33,215
Vegan, I have to remember. Vegan.
252
00:10:33,299 --> 00:10:35,176
- [whimsical music playing]
- Mmm!
253
00:10:36,469 --> 00:10:38,888
- [Tina] Step up.
- [breathing excitedly]
254
00:10:41,599 --> 00:10:43,184
[growls]
255
00:10:44,226 --> 00:10:46,145
It says you gained more than half a pound!
256
00:10:46,228 --> 00:10:48,773
- [Elvira sighs]
- We must be doing something wrong.
257
00:10:48,856 --> 00:10:52,276
What we're doing wrong
is that you're starving me to death.
258
00:10:52,360 --> 00:10:55,112
We have to take drastic measures
if we want to win this.
259
00:10:55,196 --> 00:10:56,947
- Come on, let's go.
- [groans]
260
00:10:57,031 --> 00:10:59,367
Repeat after me,
Confidence and faith. Repeat it.
261
00:10:59,450 --> 00:11:01,744
- [keyboard typing]
- [indistinct whispers]
262
00:11:01,827 --> 00:11:04,497
[Pablo] No way. All these filters
they're gonna think it's fake.
263
00:11:04,580 --> 00:11:07,291
Look, you made my nose
look like a reggaeton Pinocchio.
264
00:11:07,375 --> 00:11:10,169
Calm down, Pablo.
I didn't use so many filters.
265
00:11:10,836 --> 00:11:12,046
I posted it.
266
00:11:12,129 --> 00:11:13,881
[Silvia] Stand on the scale. Let's go.
267
00:11:13,964 --> 00:11:15,549
- [exhales]
- What?
268
00:11:16,258 --> 00:11:18,511
It says you gained more than half a pound!
269
00:11:18,594 --> 00:11:20,154
Mind telling me
what you're doing wrong?
270
00:11:20,179 --> 00:11:22,973
Well, when I get nervous,
I sometimes retain fluids.
271
00:11:23,933 --> 00:11:26,310
Okay. I have to switch strategies. Yeah.
272
00:11:26,394 --> 00:11:28,314
I've got it. We can do planks
with shoulder taps.
273
00:11:28,354 --> 00:11:30,147
- Let's go.
- [scale screeches]
274
00:11:31,148 --> 00:11:33,526
[upbeat music playing through speaker]
275
00:11:34,819 --> 00:11:36,195
[all together] Whoo!
276
00:11:36,278 --> 00:11:38,406
That's what I call quality advertising.
277
00:11:38,906 --> 00:11:39,949
[whistles]
278
00:11:40,449 --> 00:11:43,285
- [all cheering]
- [Neto chuckles]
279
00:11:44,412 --> 00:11:46,163
Thank you. Thank you.
280
00:11:46,997 --> 00:11:48,374
Hey! What's up, Netito?
281
00:11:48,457 --> 00:11:50,337
I see they got you back
in the shorts after all.
282
00:11:50,376 --> 00:11:52,628
Tell me, did you at least get a check-up?
283
00:11:52,712 --> 00:11:55,214
- Um, no, but I'm totally fine, Tommy.
- Yeah.
284
00:11:55,297 --> 00:11:56,382
Don't sweat it, Netito.
285
00:11:56,465 --> 00:11:58,902
A little finger in the tush
is actually a quite natural thing.
286
00:11:58,926 --> 00:12:00,886
It happens every day in the can.
And believe me,
287
00:12:00,970 --> 00:12:03,139
anything is better than The Spear.
288
00:12:03,222 --> 00:12:04,390
- The Spear?
- [Tomás] Yeah.
289
00:12:04,473 --> 00:12:05,473
What is that?
290
00:12:05,891 --> 00:12:08,018
Well, it's this strong pain.
291
00:12:08,102 --> 00:12:11,731
It goes from northern Baja California
all the way to Chetumal.
292
00:12:11,814 --> 00:12:13,774
From the Sierra Madre Range
to Death Valley.
293
00:12:13,858 --> 00:12:15,658
Um, from the tip of your penis
to your rectum.
294
00:12:15,693 --> 00:12:16,736
- [grunts]
- [Tomás] Yeah.
295
00:12:16,819 --> 00:12:18,112
I... I've felt that.
296
00:12:18,195 --> 00:12:19,697
Is it very serious? Is it?
297
00:12:19,780 --> 00:12:21,323
It's dead serious. It's terrible.
298
00:12:21,407 --> 00:12:23,784
Why don't you guys go see Mr. Inocencio?
299
00:12:23,868 --> 00:12:26,620
Don't worry, his finger is always ready
for another prostate exam.
300
00:12:26,704 --> 00:12:28,164
- Never!
- Yes, yes, yes.
301
00:12:28,247 --> 00:12:30,332
- We're men.
- [all grunt]
302
00:12:30,416 --> 00:12:31,709
We're not into fingering.
303
00:12:32,460 --> 00:12:35,838
Okay. You could also take the tea
that my mom used to make for Genaro.
304
00:12:35,921 --> 00:12:37,840
- It's great.
- For the prostate?
305
00:12:37,923 --> 00:12:40,342
Yes, and for everything else as well.
Yes, yes, yes.
306
00:12:40,426 --> 00:12:42,386
Every time Genaro drank it,
307
00:12:42,470 --> 00:12:45,139
he seemed energized. Damn Genaro.
308
00:12:45,222 --> 00:12:47,767
Until he died, of course.
Rest his soul. [kisses]
309
00:12:47,850 --> 00:12:50,019
Anyways, sleep on it, okay? Yeah.
310
00:12:52,188 --> 00:12:53,188
Hmm.
311
00:12:53,606 --> 00:12:56,484
Well, if it's good enough for Genie,
we can drink it too.
312
00:12:57,193 --> 00:12:58,233
Okay, let's give it a try.
313
00:12:58,277 --> 00:12:59,957
[Diego] I told you
I'd do anything for you.
314
00:13:00,738 --> 00:13:02,823
This is Winter, Raquel's son.
315
00:13:02,907 --> 00:13:05,910
He's a tattoo artist,
and he's going to give you this.
316
00:13:05,993 --> 00:13:06,994
No. Forget it.
317
00:13:07,077 --> 00:13:08,788
Anybody can get that on the beach.
318
00:13:09,288 --> 00:13:10,873
I want something original.
319
00:13:10,956 --> 00:13:12,625
Winter, do anything you want.
320
00:13:13,501 --> 00:13:14,501
[chuckles softly]
321
00:13:17,588 --> 00:13:18,923
[tattoo gun buzzing]
322
00:13:19,006 --> 00:13:21,383
[whimsical music plays]
323
00:13:21,467 --> 00:13:24,428
What's up, Lulú? How are Blondie's
workouts coming along?
324
00:13:24,512 --> 00:13:28,098
Oh, Tina. Don't tell anyone,
but I'm in pain. Even my ears hurt.
325
00:13:28,182 --> 00:13:29,350
Oh wow.
326
00:13:29,433 --> 00:13:31,977
Yeah, I can tell
you've been exercising really hard.
327
00:13:32,061 --> 00:13:34,104
Yes, but I haven't lost any weight yet.
328
00:13:34,188 --> 00:13:35,564
[sighs, sucks teeth]
329
00:13:35,648 --> 00:13:39,235
You know, I knew this was gonna happen,
so I brought you some pain medicine.
330
00:13:40,069 --> 00:13:40,903
Here.
331
00:13:40,986 --> 00:13:42,988
I'm really sorry,
but I can't pay for it right now.
332
00:13:43,072 --> 00:13:46,200
Don't worry about that, it's free.
That's what friends are for.
333
00:13:46,283 --> 00:13:47,326
Seriously?
334
00:13:47,409 --> 00:13:48,409
[clicks tongue]
335
00:13:48,786 --> 00:13:51,997
Thanks a million, Tina.
I mean it. I'm ground to a pulp.
336
00:13:52,081 --> 00:13:53,415
I imagine.
337
00:13:53,499 --> 00:13:55,019
Wait, is roasted ground maize organic?
338
00:13:55,084 --> 00:13:58,587
It doesn't go in the inorganic bin,
so I'm guessing it's definitely organic.
339
00:13:58,671 --> 00:14:00,965
How are you doing with Agustina's powders?
340
00:14:01,048 --> 00:14:02,925
Oh, they taste like poop.
341
00:14:03,008 --> 00:14:04,051
Aw.
342
00:14:04,134 --> 00:14:05,934
But listen,
if I'm going to look like Galilea,
343
00:14:06,011 --> 00:14:07,221
I'll eat whatever it takes.
344
00:14:07,304 --> 00:14:09,640
Uh-huh. What are you eating today?
345
00:14:09,723 --> 00:14:11,684
Today it's fried tortilla-flavored powder.
346
00:14:11,767 --> 00:14:14,270
I mean, why don't you eat
the actual fried tortilla
347
00:14:14,353 --> 00:14:16,188
and then spread the powder on top of it?
348
00:14:16,272 --> 00:14:19,733
That's what I did a while ago,
and I lost the weight way faster.
349
00:14:19,817 --> 00:14:21,777
- Are you serious?
- Sure.
350
00:14:21,861 --> 00:14:24,280
Okay, then.
I'll buy a masa dough snack instead.
351
00:14:24,363 --> 00:14:26,083
Also, you know,
fried tortillas are so tiny.
352
00:14:26,156 --> 00:14:28,200
- Even better. For sure.
- Right?
353
00:14:28,284 --> 00:14:29,994
- Here you go. It's 20.
- [Silvia moans]
354
00:14:30,578 --> 00:14:31,704
Exactly 20.
355
00:14:32,746 --> 00:14:34,540
[groans]
356
00:14:34,623 --> 00:14:35,623
Can you vouch for me?
357
00:14:38,544 --> 00:14:39,837
Wow, Diego got a tattoo?
358
00:14:39,920 --> 00:14:41,255
Yes. I asked him to,
359
00:14:41,338 --> 00:14:43,424
but I didn't think
he would actually get one.
360
00:14:43,507 --> 00:14:45,718
Let me see what tattoo you got, honey.
361
00:14:48,721 --> 00:14:50,598
Wait, is that Roberto Palazuelos?
362
00:14:51,181 --> 00:14:53,934
No way! It's a portrait of Tere,
in the style of Andy Warhol.
363
00:14:54,018 --> 00:14:55,978
This... this is pure art.
364
00:14:56,061 --> 00:14:57,104
[gasps]
365
00:14:57,605 --> 00:14:59,106
[Pablo] You won't like this one bit.
366
00:14:59,857 --> 00:15:02,443
Mariana commented,
"Pablo looks super fake,
367
00:15:02,526 --> 00:15:06,488
they used too many filters,
like Maradona used too many drugs."
368
00:15:07,156 --> 00:15:09,325
- [whimsical music playing]
- [phone screen locks]
369
00:15:13,412 --> 00:15:16,081
Oh my God.
They're asking for us to kiss live.
370
00:15:17,666 --> 00:15:18,709
[Pablo] Well...
371
00:15:18,792 --> 00:15:23,047
I think that we should, uh, do it.
I mean, I'm willing to,
372
00:15:23,130 --> 00:15:25,090
but if you don't... don't want to,
373
00:15:25,174 --> 00:15:27,801
or you can't,
or you feel uncomfortable about it,
374
00:15:28,302 --> 00:15:29,762
that's no problem, we won't do it.
375
00:15:29,845 --> 00:15:34,099
No. I think that it's part of, you know,
our job, so to speak, right?
376
00:15:34,183 --> 00:15:36,852
But if you don't want to, I'd understand.
377
00:15:36,936 --> 00:15:39,063
Yes, for the good
of the Toxicutes account.
378
00:15:39,688 --> 00:15:40,688
Mm-hmm.
379
00:15:42,024 --> 00:15:44,568
Okay, before you say anything,
it's for his own good.
380
00:15:44,652 --> 00:15:46,528
Tattooing his ass is for his own good?
381
00:15:46,612 --> 00:15:50,324
Okay, maybe not that, but he should learn
not to legitimize a patriarchal system.
382
00:15:50,407 --> 00:15:53,327
Why don't you just tell him
you're scared of dating officially?
383
00:15:53,410 --> 00:15:54,410
[sighs]
384
00:15:55,788 --> 00:15:57,289
But that's not it.
385
00:15:57,373 --> 00:15:58,749
I'm just trying to get him to see
386
00:15:58,832 --> 00:16:01,293
that there is more than one way
of a couple being together.
387
00:16:01,377 --> 00:16:04,171
Then tell him he has to
have more of an open mind.
388
00:16:04,254 --> 00:16:06,006
[gasps] Of course!
389
00:16:06,674 --> 00:16:08,509
That's exactly what he has to learn.
390
00:16:09,510 --> 00:16:11,303
Thank you, Janet. You're a genius.
391
00:16:13,847 --> 00:16:15,265
- Hmm.
- [keypad clicks]
392
00:16:15,849 --> 00:16:17,226
RIGO EVENTS
FOR YOUR PARTIES
393
00:16:17,810 --> 00:16:20,312
[groans] Genie's tea didn't agree with me.
394
00:16:20,396 --> 00:16:21,396
Me neither.
395
00:16:22,773 --> 00:16:24,984
The Spear impaled me
like there was no tomorrow.
396
00:16:25,567 --> 00:16:27,319
- Yeah, me too.
- [grunts]
397
00:16:27,403 --> 00:16:31,156
Maybe Tomás is right and this is
the start of prostate cancer.
398
00:16:31,240 --> 00:16:33,242
Come on, we really need
to go see Mr. Inocencio.
399
00:16:33,325 --> 00:16:34,325
No.
400
00:16:34,827 --> 00:16:37,079
I'd rather have worms in my prostate
401
00:16:37,162 --> 00:16:39,331
than people know
my pucker's no longer a virgin.
402
00:16:39,415 --> 00:16:40,582
Let's go.
403
00:16:40,666 --> 00:16:43,419
Because the bar closes tomorrow,
and we know he'll be sober.
404
00:16:43,502 --> 00:16:44,753
Yeah, all right.
405
00:16:44,837 --> 00:16:46,547
But... but this stays between you and me.
406
00:16:46,630 --> 00:16:47,464
Mm-hmm.
407
00:16:47,548 --> 00:16:48,716
[whimsical music playing]
408
00:16:50,509 --> 00:16:52,094
- [cracks]
- Ow! My finger.
409
00:16:53,345 --> 00:16:56,890
I don't know if this will work.
How am I supposed to eat it?
410
00:16:57,433 --> 00:16:59,435
[Tomás] Come on. Take it easy, Pablito.
411
00:16:59,518 --> 00:17:01,812
You see, the goal is
to make people crave your ice cream
412
00:17:01,895 --> 00:17:03,897
because of the way you kiss it.
413
00:17:03,981 --> 00:17:05,190
Does that make sense?
414
00:17:05,274 --> 00:17:06,775
- Yeah, okay.
- Go on, kiss it.
415
00:17:06,859 --> 00:17:09,778
- Do it.
- [romantic music playing]
416
00:17:09,862 --> 00:17:12,239
Stop! Not like that, Nephew!
What are you doing?
417
00:17:12,322 --> 00:17:15,492
If you do that, there's no way anyone
would believe that she's your girlfriend.
418
00:17:15,576 --> 00:17:17,453
Try again. Hey, wait a second.
419
00:17:17,536 --> 00:17:20,497
This time, put more soul into it.
Make it sexy. Go.
420
00:17:21,749 --> 00:17:24,126
[romantic music continues]
421
00:17:24,209 --> 00:17:27,046
No way, I don't believe it.
I don't know what I'm gonna do with you.
422
00:17:27,129 --> 00:17:29,048
- Was it that bad?
- Try it one more time.
423
00:17:29,131 --> 00:17:30,799
Make it sexier. Show your eyes.
424
00:17:30,883 --> 00:17:33,635
[romantic music continues]
425
00:17:33,719 --> 00:17:34,719
Mmm!
426
00:17:35,179 --> 00:17:36,472
[gasps]
427
00:17:36,555 --> 00:17:37,723
Shut that mouth!
428
00:17:38,348 --> 00:17:40,059
How many bites have you had?
429
00:17:40,559 --> 00:17:41,602
Mmm.
430
00:17:41,685 --> 00:17:43,103
Of that one, none.
431
00:17:43,187 --> 00:17:45,272
- [whimsical music playing]
- [Silvia sighs]
432
00:17:46,523 --> 00:17:47,775
Who gave this to you?
433
00:17:47,858 --> 00:17:48,858
Tina.
434
00:17:49,401 --> 00:17:52,362
She said that
it would help stop the pain, but...
435
00:17:52,446 --> 00:17:53,822
it's only making me more hungry.
436
00:17:53,906 --> 00:17:55,991
That's because these pills
are to grow your appetite.
437
00:17:56,075 --> 00:17:58,243
That's why it's called "Pig Out Pills."
438
00:17:59,536 --> 00:18:01,455
Oh! [chuckles]
439
00:18:01,538 --> 00:18:04,208
Oh well, they sure do work.
440
00:18:04,291 --> 00:18:06,877
- No! That traitor's gonna hear me out.
- Mmm.
441
00:18:07,961 --> 00:18:08,961
[gasps]
442
00:18:11,381 --> 00:18:12,674
Mm-mm.
443
00:18:14,051 --> 00:18:15,051
[Silvia scoffs]
444
00:18:18,472 --> 00:18:19,681
Hey, hey, hey!
445
00:18:20,516 --> 00:18:23,060
- Stop it. You can't eat that stuff.
- Mm-hmm.
446
00:18:23,143 --> 00:18:25,354
Chivis said I could spread the powder
on top of food
447
00:18:25,437 --> 00:18:27,106
and lose a lot of weight really fast.
448
00:18:27,189 --> 00:18:29,274
That wretch. No, no, no! Hey! Stop! No!
449
00:18:29,358 --> 00:18:32,694
She's cheating so you can gain weight.
Put that thing down. Down!
450
00:18:32,778 --> 00:18:36,281
Mmm, let me just have one more tiny bite,
just so the powder doesn't go to waste.
451
00:18:36,365 --> 00:18:38,200
- Yum!
- Mm-mm!
452
00:18:38,992 --> 00:18:40,452
Look.
453
00:18:41,995 --> 00:18:43,664
I said no, Elvira!
454
00:18:54,591 --> 00:18:56,760
Janet, I need your assistance.
455
00:18:57,344 --> 00:18:59,054
Only if you help me with the laundry.
456
00:18:59,138 --> 00:19:00,681
[whimsical music playing]
457
00:19:02,474 --> 00:19:05,978
I need you to help me kiss Pablo live
and make it look real.
458
00:19:06,061 --> 00:19:07,312
Well, just kiss him.
459
00:19:07,396 --> 00:19:09,940
But I can't. I only kiss for love.
460
00:19:10,440 --> 00:19:12,943
Help me fall in love with Pablo
for a little while?
461
00:19:13,026 --> 00:19:15,988
The trouble is,
his self-esteem depends on his followers.
462
00:19:16,071 --> 00:19:18,991
Yeah, yeah, whatever.
What can I do to fall in love with him?
463
00:19:19,074 --> 00:19:21,493
- I guess you have to get a love spell.
- A love spell?
464
00:19:21,577 --> 00:19:23,704
- Tell me all about it.
- Well, um...
465
00:19:23,787 --> 00:19:25,455
[Diego] I don't think I can do it.
466
00:19:25,539 --> 00:19:26,539
Pablito.
467
00:19:27,666 --> 00:19:29,209
Tere wants me to try pegging
468
00:19:29,293 --> 00:19:31,503
to prove to her
that I want to date her officially.
469
00:19:32,921 --> 00:19:34,339
Pegging? What's that?
470
00:19:34,423 --> 00:19:36,592
- She wants to do this to me.
- [Tomás gasps]
471
00:19:37,384 --> 00:19:39,386
[Tomás] Wow. Wow, wow. I...
472
00:19:39,469 --> 00:19:40,345
Mmm.
473
00:19:40,429 --> 00:19:43,932
I guess that must be a magical moment
for any relationship, huh?
474
00:19:44,516 --> 00:19:45,434
I'm scared.
475
00:19:45,517 --> 00:19:46,518
Of course.
476
00:19:47,102 --> 00:19:48,604
Should I do that with Crista?
477
00:19:48,687 --> 00:19:50,327
Pablito, you haven't even kissed her yet.
478
00:19:50,397 --> 00:19:51,982
- Ah.
- Show me again.
479
00:19:52,065 --> 00:19:53,817
I'm telling you,
I'm gonna win this contest.
480
00:19:53,901 --> 00:19:56,653
- I think you'll win too.
- Look who's coming. Speak of the devil.
481
00:19:56,737 --> 00:19:58,864
She should stop playing nurse. [scoffs]
482
00:19:59,740 --> 00:20:03,535
[sighs] You know, you really stooped low
taking advantage of poor Mrs. Elvira.
483
00:20:03,619 --> 00:20:06,079
And you of Lulú's innocence.
That's not fair play.
484
00:20:06,163 --> 00:20:07,331
"That's not fair play."
485
00:20:07,414 --> 00:20:09,499
As the mediator of this contest...
486
00:20:09,583 --> 00:20:12,294
Stop this nonsense,
and get your chunky ladies
487
00:20:12,377 --> 00:20:14,671
to lose weight without cheating.
488
00:20:15,964 --> 00:20:18,425
Okay, if she behaves, then so will I.
489
00:20:19,760 --> 00:20:22,304
- Do you want to ask for a spell?
- Yes.
490
00:20:22,930 --> 00:20:25,349
But this place is so different.
491
00:20:26,683 --> 00:20:28,435
Stop being so picky. Come on.
492
00:20:29,102 --> 00:20:30,938
THE SHAMANA
TAROT, WEEDING, LOVE SPELLS
493
00:20:31,021 --> 00:20:32,397
Look, Blondie.
494
00:20:32,481 --> 00:20:34,024
You need to tie together
495
00:20:34,107 --> 00:20:36,777
a lock of your hair
with your lover's hair.
496
00:20:36,860 --> 00:20:38,612
Are you sure that that will be enough?
497
00:20:38,695 --> 00:20:42,115
- It's a very efficient love spell.
- But I really only want it for a while.
498
00:20:42,199 --> 00:20:43,742
Come back later and I'll untether it.
499
00:20:43,825 --> 00:20:47,621
- Do you realize what you're saying?
- Don't listen to her, Blondie.
500
00:20:47,704 --> 00:20:50,457
Janet is a weird kid
because she has no faith.
501
00:20:51,041 --> 00:20:53,710
She didn't even want to do
her First Communion. Mm-hmm.
502
00:20:53,794 --> 00:20:57,381
Come on, Janet. The point is,
I have to fall in love with Pablo.
503
00:20:58,006 --> 00:21:00,509
- Mm-hmm. Hmm.
- [Tina] Squeeze her flabby chin, Mom.
504
00:21:00,592 --> 00:21:03,053
Okay. She has to sweat out
at least four pounds.
505
00:21:04,388 --> 00:21:06,932
Wait, wasn't I just supposed
to just drink the milkshake?
506
00:21:07,015 --> 00:21:09,851
Listen, we have to take extreme measures
or we're gonna lose.
507
00:21:09,935 --> 00:21:10,935
[Dolores] Run in place.
508
00:21:13,063 --> 00:21:14,231
No, faster!
509
00:21:14,314 --> 00:21:17,276
Like when you chase the priest
so that he'll hear your confession.
510
00:21:17,859 --> 00:21:20,320
- [moaning]
- [body thuds]
511
00:21:20,988 --> 00:21:22,656
[gasps] What's wrong?
512
00:21:22,739 --> 00:21:23,991
She fainted. Elvira!
513
00:21:24,574 --> 00:21:26,451
Did you have breakfast, Elvira?
514
00:21:27,035 --> 00:21:28,955
- [grunts]
- [Silvia] Come on, let's go. No pain.
515
00:21:29,037 --> 00:21:31,039
Oh! Yes, pain!
516
00:21:31,540 --> 00:21:32,833
- Here, take this.
- [grunts]
517
00:21:33,959 --> 00:21:35,294
[sighs]
518
00:21:35,377 --> 00:21:36,920
Isn't this Tina's milkshake?
519
00:21:37,004 --> 00:21:39,256
Yes. It's just to prove
that it doesn't work.
520
00:21:39,339 --> 00:21:40,339
- Up!
- [sighs, groans]
521
00:21:40,382 --> 00:21:41,425
Move it!
522
00:21:41,508 --> 00:21:42,676
Come on!
523
00:21:43,427 --> 00:21:45,429
- Take it!
- [groans]
524
00:21:45,512 --> 00:21:46,346
Don't stop!
525
00:21:46,430 --> 00:21:48,098
[whistle blowing]
526
00:21:48,181 --> 00:21:50,183
Get up, Lulú!
527
00:21:50,267 --> 00:21:51,852
If this is what you want...
528
00:21:53,437 --> 00:21:54,479
I'm ready.
529
00:21:54,563 --> 00:21:57,649
[romantic music playing]
530
00:21:57,733 --> 00:21:59,484
- [chuckles]
- What's so funny?
531
00:22:00,277 --> 00:22:01,820
Pull up your pants, dummy.
532
00:22:02,321 --> 00:22:03,989
I didn't think you'd accept.
533
00:22:04,573 --> 00:22:06,700
Now I see you'd do anything for me.
534
00:22:06,783 --> 00:22:08,493
Is being my girlfriend so bad?
535
00:22:09,494 --> 00:22:10,494
No, of course not.
536
00:22:11,330 --> 00:22:12,956
It's not you, it's just...
537
00:22:13,582 --> 00:22:16,335
Yeah, you told me,
it... it's not your style.
538
00:22:16,418 --> 00:22:18,587
It's not my style,
and nobody ever asked me.
539
00:22:19,504 --> 00:22:21,465
But with you,
everything has been different.
540
00:22:22,591 --> 00:22:23,967
I hate that you're a rich kid,
541
00:22:24,051 --> 00:22:26,553
but I hate even more
that I'm so in love with you.
542
00:22:28,555 --> 00:22:29,890
[Diego chuckles]
543
00:22:31,058 --> 00:22:32,934
If you want, you can put me to the test.
544
00:22:33,727 --> 00:22:35,896
- [chuckles]
- [Dolores] This is the moment of truth.
545
00:22:35,979 --> 00:22:37,397
Well, look who's here.
546
00:22:37,898 --> 00:22:39,441
And there's the scale.
547
00:22:39,524 --> 00:22:41,684
- Let's put an end to this.
- Go. Elvira, you're first.
548
00:22:41,735 --> 00:22:43,570
Come on. Stand here still.
549
00:22:43,653 --> 00:22:44,905
- Come on!
- Come on.
550
00:22:44,988 --> 00:22:46,615
[scale clanking]
551
00:22:47,532 --> 00:22:48,367
[gasps]
552
00:22:48,450 --> 00:22:50,243
- Gained two pounds.
- Damn it.
553
00:22:50,327 --> 00:22:51,828
[chuckles]
554
00:22:51,912 --> 00:22:53,997
Come on, Lulú! You can do it!
555
00:22:55,374 --> 00:22:56,500
[Lulú exhales]
556
00:22:57,042 --> 00:22:57,959
[chuckles]
557
00:22:58,043 --> 00:22:59,753
She gained two pounds too.
558
00:23:00,796 --> 00:23:04,299
- No. No, no, no. I won't accept a tie.
- No, no, no. One more week.
559
00:23:04,383 --> 00:23:05,801
- Yeah.
- No fucking way.
560
00:23:05,884 --> 00:23:07,344
No, I'm not doing this any longer.
561
00:23:07,427 --> 00:23:08,678
Neither am I.
562
00:23:09,262 --> 00:23:12,140
Luckily, Mrs. Dolores saved us
from starvation every night
563
00:23:12,224 --> 00:23:14,559
by making us her fried tortilla snacks.
564
00:23:14,643 --> 00:23:16,371
- Excuse me?
- You fed them every night, Mom?
565
00:23:16,395 --> 00:23:17,938
Don't blame me.
566
00:23:18,021 --> 00:23:22,651
Because I put double lettuce on them,
and I wiped up all the oil with a napkin.
567
00:23:22,734 --> 00:23:26,196
You should be ashamed, ma'am.
You completely cheated.
568
00:23:26,279 --> 00:23:27,948
Shame on both of you!
569
00:23:28,615 --> 00:23:30,367
You nearly killed these poor women.
570
00:23:31,743 --> 00:23:34,371
There's so much more in life
than being skinny.
571
00:23:35,122 --> 00:23:36,122
[inhales]
572
00:23:37,666 --> 00:23:39,543
- Hurry, here comes Pablo.
- Uh...
573
00:23:41,044 --> 00:23:43,463
I'm ready for our big kiss now.
574
00:23:44,172 --> 00:23:45,090
So am I.
575
00:23:45,173 --> 00:23:46,591
Janet, start livestreaming
576
00:23:46,675 --> 00:23:47,675
Cool.
577
00:23:49,970 --> 00:23:50,970
[recorder chimes]
578
00:23:52,097 --> 00:23:53,640
Toxifans, how are you?
579
00:23:53,723 --> 00:23:56,351
Let's wait for more people
to connect to talk a bit.
580
00:23:56,435 --> 00:23:59,896
I know you're only here for me
because Pablo's a nobody...
581
00:23:59,980 --> 00:24:04,443
["Calle Victoria" by Macha Kiddo
Feat. Lola Membrillo playing]
582
00:24:08,071 --> 00:24:09,698
We are offline.
583
00:24:11,533 --> 00:24:12,533
Cut, guys!
584
00:24:17,539 --> 00:24:19,624
- Was it okay?
- Mm-hmm.
585
00:24:19,708 --> 00:24:20,584
What'd they say?
586
00:24:20,667 --> 00:24:21,751
"That's hot."
587
00:24:21,835 --> 00:24:23,378
- Hmm.
- Cool.
588
00:24:23,462 --> 00:24:26,298
Gentlemen,
welcome to the backdoor community.
589
00:24:26,381 --> 00:24:28,300
[chuckles] Just kidding, just kidding.
590
00:24:28,383 --> 00:24:31,678
As far as I could feel,
everything is fine in your deep canyons.
591
00:24:31,761 --> 00:24:34,431
So, please go on
and live your lives as usual.
592
00:24:35,098 --> 00:24:36,641
What I don't understand is,
593
00:24:36,725 --> 00:24:38,768
why you demanded the physical exam,
594
00:24:39,311 --> 00:24:41,229
when nowadays there's a blood test?
595
00:24:42,230 --> 00:24:45,400
What do you mean a blood test?
You never told us about that, Tomás.
596
00:24:45,484 --> 00:24:49,154
I didn't want to be a party pooper.
That's why. Yeah, yeah.
597
00:24:49,237 --> 00:24:50,739
What did I have to suffer? Huh?
598
00:24:51,406 --> 00:24:53,325
- You were collateral damage, Rigo.
- [grunts]
599
00:24:53,408 --> 00:24:55,327
Wait, you never really cared
about my health?
600
00:24:55,410 --> 00:24:56,411
Sure I did, Neto,
601
00:24:56,495 --> 00:24:58,830
but I was more worried about mine,
and you see,
602
00:24:58,914 --> 00:25:01,917
losing my place as neighborhood sex symbol
could have serious consequences.
603
00:25:02,000 --> 00:25:03,000
Um...
604
00:25:03,335 --> 00:25:04,794
I sincerely apologize.
605
00:25:04,878 --> 00:25:09,049
It wasn't in bad faith,
but, well, yes, it was, but I apologize.
606
00:25:09,633 --> 00:25:10,842
[sighs]
607
00:25:10,926 --> 00:25:12,886
[breathes deeply]
608
00:25:12,969 --> 00:25:15,055
[gentle music playing]
609
00:25:15,138 --> 00:25:16,431
[sighs]
610
00:25:19,976 --> 00:25:24,397
[in Spanish] ♪ Maybe meeting you
Was no coincidence ♪
611
00:25:24,481 --> 00:25:27,651
♪ Maybe this was fate's doing ♪
612
00:25:28,318 --> 00:25:31,780
♪ I want to sleep on your chest again ♪
613
00:25:32,572 --> 00:25:36,535
- ♪ And then, wake up to your kisses ♪
- ♪ Your sixth sense... ♪
614
00:25:36,618 --> 00:25:39,746
[in English] They make
a beautiful couple, don't they?
615
00:25:40,497 --> 00:25:43,792
[in Spanish] ♪ I know soon
We will be together ♪
616
00:25:43,875 --> 00:25:47,420
♪ That mischievous smile
That I carry with me ♪
617
00:25:47,504 --> 00:25:48,504
[chuckles]
618
00:25:48,547 --> 00:25:51,424
♪ I know I will soon be in your path ♪
619
00:25:51,508 --> 00:25:55,011
♪ You know I'm hanging onto your hands ♪
620
00:25:56,555 --> 00:25:57,430
♪ So don't you... ♪
621
00:25:57,514 --> 00:26:00,154
[in English] If they have kids,
they're gonna look like Dalmatians.
622
00:26:00,642 --> 00:26:03,395
- Spotted?
- [chuckles] I mean, yeah.
623
00:26:04,229 --> 00:26:06,773
That's what happens when a brown chick
gets with a blonde guy...
624
00:26:06,856 --> 00:26:07,941
- Shh!
- ...polka dots.
625
00:26:08,441 --> 00:26:09,441
Yeah.
626
00:26:10,110 --> 00:26:14,239
♪ I send you songs
Written by my own hand ♪
627
00:26:14,322 --> 00:26:17,951
♪ I send you songs
By Juan Luis Guerra's 440 ♪
628
00:26:18,034 --> 00:26:21,830
♪ I send you photographs
Of us dining in Martella ♪
629
00:26:21,913 --> 00:26:25,959
♪ And when we went to Venezuela ♪
630
00:26:26,042 --> 00:26:29,838
♪ That way you'll remember
And never forget me ♪
631
00:26:29,921 --> 00:26:34,217
[both] ♪ That my heart
Is hanging in your hands ♪
632
00:26:34,301 --> 00:26:35,594
♪ Treat it right ♪
633
00:26:36,428 --> 00:26:37,470
♪ Treat it right ♪
634
00:26:37,971 --> 00:26:40,849
♪ For my heart is hanging in your hands ♪
635
00:26:42,100 --> 00:26:43,435
[chuckles]
636
00:26:43,518 --> 00:26:44,644
[in English] I love her!
637
00:26:45,145 --> 00:26:46,563
I even got a tattoo for her, look!
638
00:26:46,646 --> 00:26:48,648
- No, don't, Diego!
- Diego, no, don't do it.
639
00:26:48,732 --> 00:26:50,734
- Kiss, kiss!
- Kiss her!
640
00:26:50,817 --> 00:26:51,651
- Yay!
- [cheering]
641
00:26:51,735 --> 00:26:54,321
[salsa music playing through speaker]
642
00:26:54,404 --> 00:26:55,572
Come one, come all!
643
00:26:55,655 --> 00:26:58,116
Take advantage
of our special prices this weekend,
644
00:26:58,199 --> 00:27:01,369
only at Events By Rigo, go, go...
645
00:27:01,911 --> 00:27:03,580
Buddy, buddy, buddy!
646
00:27:03,663 --> 00:27:05,707
Sales are soaring, huh? [chuckles]
647
00:27:05,790 --> 00:27:08,001
- I knew Mr. Inocencio wouldn't tell.
- Right!
648
00:27:08,084 --> 00:27:09,919
Hey, how's it hanging?
649
00:27:10,003 --> 00:27:11,588
Just look at you, Ernesto.
650
00:27:11,671 --> 00:27:14,400
I've been talking to friends
and heard you're as pretty on the outside
651
00:27:14,424 --> 00:27:15,864
- as you are on the inside.
- [gasps]
652
00:27:16,843 --> 00:27:18,345
Rigo, you too, darling.
653
00:27:18,428 --> 00:27:19,721
Bye. [kisses]
654
00:27:21,598 --> 00:27:23,808
- [sighs]
- Fucking Inocencio.
655
00:27:25,685 --> 00:27:27,854
Come one, come all! Get your discounts!
656
00:27:27,937 --> 00:27:29,981
"Pretty on the inside." Mmm.
657
00:27:30,482 --> 00:27:32,484
A tamale with green sauce, please.
658
00:27:34,527 --> 00:27:35,445
Thank you.
659
00:27:35,528 --> 00:27:37,715
- Are you trying to kill yourself, Mom?
- Of course not.
660
00:27:37,739 --> 00:27:40,075
Dolores says this has nutrients.
661
00:27:40,158 --> 00:27:41,534
Yeah, and a ton of oil.
662
00:27:41,618 --> 00:27:43,411
Fine, I'll pat it off with a napkin.
663
00:27:43,495 --> 00:27:44,495
[chuckles]
664
00:27:45,413 --> 00:27:48,083
Look, there's more to life
than being skinny.
665
00:27:52,587 --> 00:27:53,672
Mmm!
666
00:27:54,339 --> 00:27:55,256
It's delicious.
667
00:27:55,340 --> 00:27:57,258
- Want one?
- Do you have the pink kind?
668
00:27:58,635 --> 00:28:00,470
Nine, ten,
669
00:28:00,553 --> 00:28:03,390
- eleven, twelve, thirteen!
- [breathes heavily]
670
00:28:03,473 --> 00:28:05,892
You decided
on Silvia's method after all, Auntie?
671
00:28:05,975 --> 00:28:06,976
Not really.
672
00:28:07,060 --> 00:28:09,646
Blondie isn't my cup of tea,
but she has nice legs.
673
00:28:09,729 --> 00:28:10,980
There's no harm in trying.
674
00:28:11,940 --> 00:28:13,775
I think it's good for you to exercise.
675
00:28:13,858 --> 00:28:15,235
It's good once in a while, dear.
676
00:28:15,318 --> 00:28:18,738
Later I'll compensate,
a quesadilla for each sit-up.
677
00:28:18,822 --> 00:28:20,073
- [chuckles]
- Yeah?
678
00:28:20,156 --> 00:28:21,241
Your grandma's right.
679
00:28:21,324 --> 00:28:23,535
There's more to life
than trying to be skinny.
680
00:28:23,618 --> 00:28:25,537
- Sure.
- Enjoy your Popsicle.
681
00:28:25,620 --> 00:28:27,122
[exhales]
682
00:28:28,498 --> 00:28:33,002
Three, four, five, six...
683
00:28:33,086 --> 00:28:38,341
["El Dinero No Es La Vida"
by Ximena Sariñana & Rubén Blades playing]
684
00:31:00,900 --> 00:31:02,110
[song ends]