1
00:00:40,119 --> 00:00:41,313
I now bring to your attention....
2
00:00:41,387 --> 00:00:45,983
...one of the most stunning treasures
in the British Library's entire collection.
3
00:00:46,058 --> 00:00:47,719
The Magna Carta.
4
00:01:00,106 --> 00:01:01,368
And now, over here...
5
00:01:02,108 --> 00:01:06,772
...perhaps the most cherished
ancient artifact in the Western world.
6
00:01:07,513 --> 00:01:09,310
The Shroud of Turin.
7
00:01:28,401 --> 00:01:29,629
The Imperial Sword!
8
00:01:42,281 --> 00:01:45,341
Chief Inspector Dreyfus is here to see you.
9
00:01:45,418 --> 00:01:47,283
- Chief Inspector.
- Sir.
10
00:01:48,054 --> 00:01:50,284
I'm sure you know why you're here.
11
00:01:50,356 --> 00:01:53,814
The British, the Italians and the Japanese
are assembling an elite squad...
12
00:01:53,893 --> 00:01:55,986
...of their finest detectives...
13
00:01:56,062 --> 00:02:01,090
...an international Dream Team
to track down this Tornado.
14
00:02:01,167 --> 00:02:04,625
- And France will be represented?
- Exactly.
15
00:02:05,404 --> 00:02:08,601
I am honored, but not surprised.
16
00:02:08,674 --> 00:02:11,871
This is the culmination of my career.
17
00:02:13,112 --> 00:02:15,478
The moment
that I've been waiting for all my life.
18
00:02:15,548 --> 00:02:17,778
- No, no, no.
- Well, not all my life, perhaps...
19
00:02:17,850 --> 00:02:19,715
- No, no.
- No. Nevertheless...
20
00:02:19,785 --> 00:02:23,949
They want Clouseau, since he is
considered the top detective in the world.
21
00:02:24,023 --> 00:02:28,392
We have been asked if Clouseau
is available to lead the Dream Team.
22
00:02:28,461 --> 00:02:30,929
- Clouseau?
- Yes, yes.
23
00:02:36,235 --> 00:02:39,466
- Is there something wrong?
- No, no, not at all.
24
00:02:39,538 --> 00:02:42,530
Would you mind if I use your bathroom
just for a moment?
25
00:02:42,608 --> 00:02:44,473
- Certainly.
- Thank you.
26
00:02:49,515 --> 00:02:50,846
Clouseau.
27
00:03:07,900 --> 00:03:11,233
I'm afraid, sir,
that Clouseau is currently occupied.
28
00:03:11,304 --> 00:03:12,931
- What?
- I've assigned him to a mission...
29
00:03:13,005 --> 00:03:14,233
...so important for our country...
30
00:03:14,307 --> 00:03:18,641
...that I fear for our national security
if he was taken off it.
31
00:03:36,562 --> 00:03:38,359
Clearly a violation.
32
00:03:40,099 --> 00:03:41,657
Parking ticket.
33
00:03:42,868 --> 00:03:44,199
What is this for?
34
00:03:44,270 --> 00:03:48,707
Thirty-one centimeters from the curb,
nine centimeters too far.
35
00:03:49,742 --> 00:03:54,736
Nine centimeters into
the seamy black underbelly of crime.
36
00:04:09,261 --> 00:04:12,355
- You must take the ticket. Take it.
- Never!
37
00:04:13,032 --> 00:04:15,023
You must take the ticket.
38
00:04:23,943 --> 00:04:26,571
You're not wearing your seatbelt.
39
00:04:26,645 --> 00:04:29,637
You are going to have to go
to traffic school.
40
00:04:37,556 --> 00:04:38,955
Pardon me.
41
00:04:40,860 --> 00:04:43,829
- Stop this car immediately.
- Okay.
42
00:08:00,859 --> 00:08:02,554
Right.
43
00:08:02,628 --> 00:08:05,153
- Are you finished yet?
- Complete and operational.
44
00:08:05,230 --> 00:08:08,722
Chief Inspector,
your new system will monitor and record...
45
00:08:08,801 --> 00:08:11,292
...every word and every movement
in this room.
46
00:08:11,370 --> 00:08:13,429
So, if anyone breaks in, what happens?
47
00:08:13,505 --> 00:08:18,135
Your office is linked to the elite
Black Berets. They will be here in seconds.
48
00:08:18,210 --> 00:08:21,145
Sir, Inspector Clouseau is here to see you.
49
00:08:22,715 --> 00:08:23,807
Send him in.
50
00:08:23,882 --> 00:08:27,249
- Clouseau?
- I have to appoint him to the Dream Team.
51
00:08:27,319 --> 00:08:30,186
- Clouseau?
- Don't ask, don't...
52
00:08:30,255 --> 00:08:33,816
Good afternoon, Chief Inspector.
I'm here with my report.
53
00:08:35,127 --> 00:08:36,560
This darn Medal of Honor.
54
00:08:36,629 --> 00:08:39,257
You're so fortunate
you never got one, Chief Inspector.
55
00:08:39,331 --> 00:08:44,325
You look so tidy having no honors
or other forms of distinguishing decor.
56
00:08:44,403 --> 00:08:48,134
Why don't you wear it under your shirt,
you know, out of sight?
57
00:08:48,207 --> 00:08:52,234
Brilliant idea, Chief Inspector.
That way it won't clang around.
58
00:08:52,778 --> 00:08:55,406
Now, the parking ticket situation.
59
00:08:55,481 --> 00:08:59,383
Over the last six weeks,
I've given out almost four parking tickets.
60
00:08:59,451 --> 00:09:01,442
One at the musйe, overtime.
61
00:09:01,520 --> 00:09:06,719
And one, you'll recall, to you,
in violation of the bent-license-plate law.
62
00:09:06,792 --> 00:09:09,352
- Yes, I recall.
- It's all there in the report.
63
00:09:09,428 --> 00:09:12,295
Fascinating.
Well, I shall waste no time in reading it.
64
00:09:12,364 --> 00:09:16,824
And just in case, I've deftly cataloged,
numbered and cross-referenced...
65
00:09:16,902 --> 00:09:19,735
...each offense
here in my little black book.
66
00:09:19,805 --> 00:09:25,437
Now, Clouseau, you remember when I first
put you on that parking ticket detail...
67
00:09:25,511 --> 00:09:28,446
Yes, you explained
it was a top level assignment.
68
00:09:28,514 --> 00:09:33,178
And that if anyone ever asked you
if I was the one who had assigned you...
69
00:09:33,252 --> 00:09:36,949
...to this incredibly important mission,
you would deny it.
70
00:09:37,022 --> 00:09:42,619
Chief Inspector, I don't even know
what you are talking about.
71
00:09:43,829 --> 00:09:45,296
Good work, Clouseau.
72
00:09:45,364 --> 00:09:51,428
Now, to business. I have been
instructed to reassign you...
73
00:09:54,406 --> 00:09:55,703
Clouseau?
74
00:09:59,044 --> 00:10:00,375
Clouseau.
75
00:10:13,659 --> 00:10:15,593
We were being recorded.
76
00:10:19,732 --> 00:10:23,600
- The Black Berets.
- The password. What is the password?
77
00:10:23,669 --> 00:10:25,933
- I don't know.
- Four, three...
78
00:10:26,004 --> 00:10:28,438
- We weren't yet told.
- ...two, one.
79
00:10:29,341 --> 00:10:31,206
Hamburger.
80
00:10:31,276 --> 00:10:33,608
Thank you, sir. Have a nice day.
81
00:10:38,417 --> 00:10:41,750
- The password was "hamburger"?
- No, "hamburger".
82
00:10:41,820 --> 00:10:45,256
- I said "hamburger".
- No, you said "hamburger".
83
00:10:45,324 --> 00:10:47,315
- Hamburger?
- Hamburger.
84
00:10:48,494 --> 00:10:51,258
How did you know
that we were being recorded?
85
00:10:51,330 --> 00:10:52,991
Easy, Inspector.
86
00:10:53,065 --> 00:10:57,126
This pen emits a small beeping noise
whenever it detects microwaves.
87
00:10:57,202 --> 00:10:59,796
- RadioShack. $12.
- What?
88
00:10:59,872 --> 00:11:05,037
- How did you know the password?
- This little LED chip decodes passwords.
89
00:11:05,110 --> 00:11:08,568
I had it attached to the back
of my Medal of Honor.
90
00:11:08,647 --> 00:11:12,640
- RadioShack?
- EBay. I got this there, too.
91
00:11:15,020 --> 00:11:17,989
- What do you think this is?
- A tape recorder?
92
00:11:18,824 --> 00:11:23,625
No. It only looks like a tape-recorder.
It's actually a pen.
93
00:11:27,166 --> 00:11:29,657
So you can write with it
and no one will know.
94
00:11:29,735 --> 00:11:31,225
Bingo!
95
00:11:31,303 --> 00:11:34,761
Now, you were saying, Inspector.
96
00:11:35,407 --> 00:11:38,501
- You are being reassigned.
- Let me read your mind.
97
00:11:38,577 --> 00:11:42,035
The Tornado is at large, and you want me
to protect the Pink Panther.
98
00:11:42,114 --> 00:11:43,172
- No.
- No?
99
00:11:43,248 --> 00:11:45,341
It is my job to protect the Pink Panther.
100
00:11:45,417 --> 00:11:48,545
You've merely been reassigned
to the Dream Team.
101
00:11:50,722 --> 00:11:52,519
That is quite an honor...
102
00:11:52,591 --> 00:11:55,116
- But I cannot accept.
- What?
103
00:11:55,194 --> 00:11:57,094
If Inspector Clouseau
were to leave France...
104
00:11:57,162 --> 00:11:59,426
...the Tornado would surely strike
at the Pink Panther.
105
00:11:59,498 --> 00:12:01,557
- I'm guarding it!
- But...
106
00:12:01,633 --> 00:12:04,295
Don't argue.
You fly to Kyoto in the morning.
107
00:12:04,369 --> 00:12:05,961
But I can't fly.
108
00:12:06,972 --> 00:12:09,133
In a plane!
109
00:12:09,208 --> 00:12:11,438
- But still...
- That's an order.
110
00:12:19,251 --> 00:12:20,445
Nicole.
111
00:12:25,424 --> 00:12:27,051
You are traveling?
112
00:12:27,125 --> 00:12:31,653
Yes, Inspector Dreyfus is sending me
on a very dangerous mission.
113
00:12:31,730 --> 00:12:35,996
- For how long? When will you return?
- I will return when the criminal is caught.
114
00:12:36,068 --> 00:12:40,027
It could be a month, it could be a year.
You understand, Nicole.
115
00:12:40,472 --> 00:12:44,431
- Yes, yes, of course.
- Of course, we will have to stay apart.
116
00:12:44,509 --> 00:12:48,775
If the criminal were to, say, kidnap you,
he would have power over me.
117
00:12:49,648 --> 00:12:52,082
Why would he have power over you?
118
00:12:53,585 --> 00:12:58,545
Well, because, well...
119
00:12:59,892 --> 00:13:02,087
...you are like a brother to me.
120
00:13:04,463 --> 00:13:07,193
A hot, sexy brother in a dress.
121
00:13:08,867 --> 00:13:13,531
Nicole, I hope you have forgiven me
for that one evening.
122
00:13:13,605 --> 00:13:16,130
Yes, Inspector, it is forgotten.
123
00:13:16,208 --> 00:13:18,972
- I have not forgotten.
- Neither have I.
124
00:13:25,951 --> 00:13:30,285
So, even though, technically,
we are on duty...
125
00:13:30,355 --> 00:13:34,189
...do you think it would be all right
to share a bottle of wine?
126
00:13:34,259 --> 00:13:36,352
I think it would be all right.
127
00:13:36,428 --> 00:13:40,023
Then I will select the wine.
It is one of my specialties.
128
00:13:44,202 --> 00:13:47,035
I would like to select my own wine.
129
00:13:47,105 --> 00:13:50,563
And by the way,
I am Inspector Jacques Clouseau.
130
00:13:50,642 --> 00:13:52,439
Remember this face.
131
00:14:53,005 --> 00:14:56,372
- This is a very special bottle.
- Delicious.
132
00:15:09,021 --> 00:15:11,455
There was something about
burning down a restaurant...
133
00:15:11,523 --> 00:15:15,391
...that ignited other, more illicit, fires.
134
00:15:19,097 --> 00:15:24,091
- And I'm sorry about that.
- As am I. Terribly remorseful.
135
00:15:24,169 --> 00:15:27,661
It was a night to remember
that we must forget.
136
00:15:27,739 --> 00:15:29,969
We must never forget to not remember it.
137
00:15:30,042 --> 00:15:33,603
And if we do remember it,
we must immediately forget it.
138
00:15:34,646 --> 00:15:37,843
Now, let's have
a professional hug goodbye.
139
00:15:43,488 --> 00:15:47,151
I'll be right there.
I'll see you in several months.
140
00:15:47,225 --> 00:15:51,491
- No problem.
- And I do hope your hearing improves.
141
00:15:58,737 --> 00:16:02,002
Ponton,
I'm worried about my leaving France.
142
00:16:02,074 --> 00:16:05,703
The Tornado is rampant.
The Pink Panther is such a temptation...
143
00:16:05,777 --> 00:16:08,143
...and no Clouseau to protect it.
144
00:16:08,213 --> 00:16:11,979
But you visited the museum yourself,
you checked the security.
145
00:16:12,050 --> 00:16:15,611
- It's gonna be all right.
- Yes, I suppose you're right.
146
00:16:16,455 --> 00:16:20,152
- Are you driving?
- I like to stay in practice.
147
00:16:27,866 --> 00:16:30,096
- Okay.
- Remind me where the brakes are.
148
00:16:30,168 --> 00:16:31,760
- Here. Yes.
- There?
149
00:16:31,837 --> 00:16:33,668
- Yes.
- And then you turn here.
150
00:16:33,738 --> 00:16:34,830
- Of course, yes.
- All right.
151
00:16:34,906 --> 00:16:35,964
- And this turns it.
- Yeah.
152
00:16:36,041 --> 00:16:37,668
Okay, here we go.
153
00:16:42,614 --> 00:16:44,013
- Ponton.
- Yes?
154
00:16:44,082 --> 00:16:48,041
- This case is very strange.
- How so, Inspector?
155
00:16:48,120 --> 00:16:50,611
For 10 years,
the Tornado terrorized Europe...
156
00:16:50,689 --> 00:16:54,181
...stealing over a quarter of a billion
dollars worth of artifacts.
157
00:16:54,259 --> 00:16:56,955
Then, for no reason, he suddenly stops.
158
00:16:57,762 --> 00:17:00,196
Maybe the Tornado thought
he had enough money.
159
00:17:00,265 --> 00:17:05,032
If he had enough money, then why,
after 10 years of complete inactivity...
160
00:17:05,103 --> 00:17:07,571
...does he suddenly spring back into action?
161
00:17:07,639 --> 00:17:11,006
London, the Magna Carta.
Italy, the sacred Shroud.
162
00:17:12,911 --> 00:17:18,178
The Imperial Sword. Why now?
Why all of a sudden? Why? Why?
163
00:17:26,291 --> 00:17:28,191
You need to calm down.
164
00:17:39,304 --> 00:17:40,396
Hey!
165
00:17:47,312 --> 00:17:51,339
What's the matter, Ponton?
You seem a little depressed today.
166
00:17:52,317 --> 00:17:54,911
- Is it your wife again?
- Yes.
167
00:17:55,754 --> 00:17:58,689
She still feels my job
takes up too much of my time.
168
00:17:59,457 --> 00:18:01,391
The same old thing.
169
00:18:01,459 --> 00:18:06,192
Next week is our 10th anniversary.
She thinks we should go away together.
170
00:18:06,264 --> 00:18:09,062
Ponton, would you like me
to talk with her?
171
00:18:09,134 --> 00:18:10,192
No.
172
00:18:11,236 --> 00:18:14,603
I mean, this issue must be discussed
between husband and wife.
173
00:18:14,673 --> 00:18:18,734
Well, you must explain to her
that we are men of the law.
174
00:18:18,810 --> 00:18:21,005
Always living in the shadows.
175
00:18:24,549 --> 00:18:25,777
Idiot.
176
00:18:27,752 --> 00:18:29,845
I will miss you, Inspector.
177
00:18:30,956 --> 00:18:33,186
I will miss you, too, Ponton.
178
00:18:34,125 --> 00:18:35,956
- And, Ponton.
- Yes?
179
00:18:36,027 --> 00:18:38,723
I am sorry you can't satisfy your wife.
180
00:18:43,101 --> 00:18:45,262
"I am now leaving France".
181
00:18:46,037 --> 00:18:47,800
This is a bad idea.
182
00:18:52,110 --> 00:18:55,637
The legendary Pink Panther Diamond
has been stolen.
183
00:18:55,714 --> 00:18:58,547
Officials suspect the perpetrator
is the infamous Tornado.
184
00:18:58,617 --> 00:19:00,346
What'd I tell you?
185
00:19:00,585 --> 00:19:04,919
The theft of the Pink Panther would be
the fourth high-profile crime...
186
00:19:05,690 --> 00:19:08,682
Oh, my God! He was right.
187
00:19:10,328 --> 00:19:14,856
The Dream Team was supposed to start
its investigations in Kyoto, Japan...
188
00:19:14,933 --> 00:19:17,595
...but it's just been diverted to Paris.
189
00:19:17,669 --> 00:19:18,727
France is in shock.
190
00:19:18,803 --> 00:19:22,398
The international Dream Team
of detectives will begin...
191
00:19:23,642 --> 00:19:28,306
I'm standing outside the Grand Palais
where the Pink Panther has been stolen.
192
00:19:35,186 --> 00:19:38,087
Why are they cheering?
This is a national tragedy.
193
00:19:38,156 --> 00:19:41,853
We live in a media age.
You must learn to adapt.
194
00:19:41,926 --> 00:19:43,757
Then adapt I shall.
195
00:19:53,305 --> 00:19:57,207
- Who do you think did this, Inspector?
- Inspector, any comment?
196
00:19:58,843 --> 00:20:01,403
Tornado, I'm coming to get you.
197
00:20:02,314 --> 00:20:03,611
One more.
198
00:20:04,749 --> 00:20:08,742
Tornado, I'm coming to get you.
There's your one.
199
00:20:12,023 --> 00:20:16,119
Good afternoon, Inspector.
The other detectives have already arrived.
200
00:20:16,194 --> 00:20:18,219
They are waiting for you.
201
00:20:19,164 --> 00:20:22,156
- I'm sorry, I don't remember your name.
- What?
202
00:20:25,236 --> 00:20:32,165
- Yes. I am Nicole.
- Yes, so nice to see you again.
203
00:20:32,243 --> 00:20:34,006
You, too, Inspector.
204
00:20:35,246 --> 00:20:38,943
Well, enough of this foreplay.
Where are the other detectives?
205
00:20:39,017 --> 00:20:41,178
Yes, they're waiting inside.
206
00:20:42,654 --> 00:20:44,713
I hope no one has
tampered with the crime scene.
207
00:20:44,789 --> 00:20:46,347
A crime scene is like a code.
208
00:20:46,424 --> 00:20:49,484
You decipher it,
and it will lead inexorably to the criminal.
209
00:20:49,561 --> 00:20:53,088
That is why it must always be kept
in pristine condition.
210
00:21:04,275 --> 00:21:08,405
Good day. I'm Inspector Jacques Clouseau
of the French Police.
211
00:21:08,780 --> 00:21:12,477
Vicenzo Roccara
Squarcialupi Brancaleone.
212
00:21:12,550 --> 00:21:14,040
And your name?
213
00:21:15,920 --> 00:21:18,718
Vicenzo Roccara
Squarcialupi Brancaleone.
214
00:21:18,790 --> 00:21:23,124
That is your name. I thought you were
ordering in Italian. Once again.
215
00:21:25,697 --> 00:21:29,963
Vicenzo Roccara
Squarcialupi Brancaleone.
216
00:21:32,303 --> 00:21:33,964
Don Corleone.
217
00:21:34,906 --> 00:21:36,066
I'm Kenji Mazuto.
218
00:21:36,141 --> 00:21:37,870
Kenji Mazel Tov.
219
00:21:37,942 --> 00:21:39,705
Randall Pepperidge.
220
00:21:41,112 --> 00:21:44,946
And this is my associate Gilbert Ponton,
and this is Nicole.
221
00:21:45,016 --> 00:21:46,813
Nicole is here to service your needs...
222
00:21:46,885 --> 00:21:49,820
...so feel free to use her
in any way you wish.
223
00:21:52,357 --> 00:21:55,087
And now there is a crime scene waiting.
224
00:21:57,462 --> 00:22:00,522
Excuse me. "El sceno de crimo".
225
00:22:02,734 --> 00:22:08,434
- That is not Italian, and I do
speak English. - Really? Prove it.
226
00:22:08,973 --> 00:22:13,137
Gentlemen, we first have to determine
how the crime was committed.
227
00:22:13,211 --> 00:22:16,078
And as I am an expert at deduction...
228
00:22:16,147 --> 00:22:19,014
- You are an expert at deduction?
- That is my field.
229
00:22:19,083 --> 00:22:24,453
I believe deduction is my field
and since you are experiencing hip pain...
230
00:22:24,522 --> 00:22:25,887
How did you know that?
231
00:22:25,957 --> 00:22:28,551
One side of the sole of your shoe
is worn more than the other.
232
00:22:28,626 --> 00:22:30,958
You're favoring your right leg.
233
00:22:31,029 --> 00:22:34,988
Tell me, did you enjoy
your double espresso this morning?
234
00:22:35,066 --> 00:22:37,557
- How did you...
- Your pupils are noticeably dilated.
235
00:22:37,635 --> 00:22:40,604
And will you be moving out
of the Hotel Montmartre?
236
00:22:40,672 --> 00:22:42,970
They are doing construction at night
around the Montmartre...
237
00:22:43,041 --> 00:22:45,373
...so as not to disturb daytime traffic.
238
00:22:45,443 --> 00:22:49,209
From your puffy eyes,
I deduce you spent a sleepless night.
239
00:22:49,948 --> 00:22:53,384
Speaking of traffic,
are you enjoying your Smart car?
240
00:22:54,285 --> 00:22:56,185
Your trousers are wrinkled
behind the knees.
241
00:22:56,254 --> 00:23:00,281
And how do you think your favorite
football team, Arsenal, will do this year?
242
00:23:00,358 --> 00:23:02,690
That matchbox is from
the only bar in Paris...
243
00:23:02,760 --> 00:23:04,694
...that shows English football telecasts.
244
00:23:04,762 --> 00:23:06,889
You have tissues in your shoes
to make you look taller.
245
00:23:06,965 --> 00:23:10,093
You were 14 before you finally
learned to enjoy avocado.
246
00:23:10,168 --> 00:23:14,002
Tell me, how did you enjoy
your trip to the airport this morning?
247
00:23:14,072 --> 00:23:16,700
Now, how did you know that?
248
00:23:17,242 --> 00:23:20,541
- Perhaps one of you should begin.
- Yes, this is silly.
249
00:23:20,612 --> 00:23:21,943
You've recently lost
your favorite cheese grater.
250
00:23:22,013 --> 00:23:23,810
You have an aversion to cow bells.
251
00:23:23,882 --> 00:23:26,407
Stop the insanity and look at this.
252
00:23:27,685 --> 00:23:30,779
Il Tornado is not as careful as he thinks.
253
00:23:35,026 --> 00:23:39,690
Fingerprint. With this small piece of glass,
the case is practically solved.
254
00:23:41,633 --> 00:23:43,760
This one has a fingerprint.
255
00:23:45,904 --> 00:23:48,270
This one has a fingerprint, too.
256
00:23:48,339 --> 00:23:50,239
This one has a fingerprint.
257
00:23:50,308 --> 00:23:54,142
You don't need that.
You have plenty of fingerprint evidence.
258
00:23:57,448 --> 00:23:58,847
Guard that.
259
00:24:01,219 --> 00:24:04,188
What do we know about this man,
this Tornado.
260
00:24:05,356 --> 00:24:08,814
Well, we know that he's a white male
between 50 and 65...
261
00:24:08,893 --> 00:24:11,953
...with a scar from a bullet hole
behind his right shoulder.
262
00:24:12,030 --> 00:24:17,024
In 1996, the Tornado was shot right here
in France while trying to steal a gold vase.
263
00:24:17,101 --> 00:24:22,004
Blood was found, and as a result, his
DNA has been on file for over 10 years...
264
00:24:22,740 --> 00:24:24,332
...without a match.
265
00:24:27,512 --> 00:24:30,811
I'm sorry I'm a bit late.
My flight was delayed.
266
00:24:30,882 --> 00:24:33,282
You're Jacques Clouseau.
267
00:24:36,521 --> 00:24:40,389
The Pink Panther detective.
This is such a thrill.
268
00:24:41,459 --> 00:24:44,656
- And who is it that are you?
- I'm Sonia Solandres.
269
00:24:45,196 --> 00:24:49,292
- Didn't anyone tell you that...
- Yes. I was informed.
270
00:24:49,367 --> 00:24:52,302
- A last-minute addition to our team.
- That's right.
271
00:24:52,370 --> 00:24:54,804
I've written a book
on the old Tornado crimes...
272
00:24:54,872 --> 00:24:57,773
...but I'm not sure
if I'm really gonna be much help here.
273
00:24:57,842 --> 00:25:01,141
Technically speaking,
I'm not really a detective.
274
00:25:01,212 --> 00:25:04,113
Welcome.
We can always use an extra mind.
275
00:25:04,182 --> 00:25:07,242
Now, let me bring you up to speed.
We know nothing.
276
00:25:07,318 --> 00:25:08,717
You are now up to speed.
277
00:25:15,193 --> 00:25:16,820
In world news today...
278
00:25:16,894 --> 00:25:21,422
...members of the Dream Team gathered for
the first time in front of the Grand Palais...
279
00:25:21,499 --> 00:25:24,900
...to start their investigations
into the Tornado thefts.
280
00:25:24,969 --> 00:25:27,938
Inspector Clouseau had this to say.
281
00:25:28,006 --> 00:25:32,170
Tornado, I'm coming to get you.
There's your one.
282
00:25:35,747 --> 00:25:38,580
I was able to discover this Tornado
hacked the security system...
283
00:25:38,650 --> 00:25:43,053
...from a remote location and turned off
all the alarms and surveillance scanners.
284
00:25:43,121 --> 00:25:46,613
- Can you trace the source?
- Yes, but it will take time.
285
00:25:48,993 --> 00:25:52,929
- You are new here?
- Yes, hello. Mrs. Berenger.
286
00:25:52,997 --> 00:25:55,659
- I know who you are, Inspector.
- Do you?
287
00:25:55,733 --> 00:25:58,600
Due to the media frenzy
surrounding this case...
288
00:25:58,670 --> 00:26:03,369
I've been assigned to instruct employees
on political and social correctness.
289
00:26:03,908 --> 00:26:06,741
It's always nice
to have a very sexy woman...
290
00:26:06,811 --> 00:26:09,678
...clomping around the building
in high heels.
291
00:26:12,950 --> 00:26:18,252
- You must never refer to a woman as sexy.
- But I was complimenting you.
292
00:26:18,322 --> 00:26:22,258
No, Inspector, you must not comment
on a woman's body.
293
00:26:23,327 --> 00:26:27,525
- I get it. I get it. I keep it to myself...
- Yes.
294
00:26:27,598 --> 00:26:32,092
- ...when I am thinking...
- Inspector.
295
00:26:34,272 --> 00:26:37,537
This will be an exercise
and I want you to concentrate.
296
00:26:37,608 --> 00:26:42,136
And no matter what I say,
I want your expression to remain neutral.
297
00:26:42,213 --> 00:26:43,942
That will be easy.
298
00:26:44,449 --> 00:26:46,576
You're here in the corridor
at your employment...
299
00:26:46,651 --> 00:26:49,711
...and you see a very pretty young woman
walking toward you...
300
00:26:49,787 --> 00:26:53,746
...and her blouse is tight
and is rather bursting at the buttons...
301
00:26:53,825 --> 00:26:55,315
...and she drops her pencil...
302
00:26:55,393 --> 00:26:58,760
...and as she bends to retrieve it,
her blouse parts...
303
00:26:58,830 --> 00:27:02,561
...revealing the cleavage
of her soft, round, white mounds.
304
00:27:02,633 --> 00:27:05,898
And then the pencil rolls around
and she bends again...
305
00:27:05,970 --> 00:27:09,428
...and her undulating buttocks
cause the short skirt to rise...
306
00:27:09,507 --> 00:27:12,408
...just shy of the nooks and crannies.
307
00:27:16,681 --> 00:27:21,641
I like you, Mrs. Berenger. I like you a lot.
308
00:27:22,220 --> 00:27:25,485
So, I have made lunch reservations
at four different restaurants...
309
00:27:25,556 --> 00:27:28,582
...depending on who wants to eat where.
310
00:27:28,659 --> 00:27:33,653
You know,
I cannot decide what is more beautiful.
311
00:27:34,432 --> 00:27:36,696
Paris or you.
312
00:27:44,575 --> 00:27:47,066
May I have a word in private?
313
00:27:49,247 --> 00:27:55,550
I'm worried that your hot Italian blood
might be leading you into an indiscretion.
314
00:27:56,020 --> 00:27:57,044
Really?
315
00:27:57,121 --> 00:28:01,854
Yes, these attentions
you're paying to Nicole.
316
00:28:01,926 --> 00:28:03,018
What?
317
00:28:05,596 --> 00:28:07,962
I see. You and she, you like the...
318
00:28:08,032 --> 00:28:11,433
Oh, no, no, no.
She and I are co-workers, nothing more.
319
00:28:11,502 --> 00:28:12,969
So I'm not stepping on toes.
320
00:28:13,037 --> 00:28:16,200
How could you, since she and I have
absolutely no feelings for one another.
321
00:28:16,274 --> 00:28:20,074
Good, because I find her very alluring.
322
00:28:20,144 --> 00:28:25,582
No. No. For a man like you, she's too drab.
323
00:28:26,184 --> 00:28:30,746
- Drab?
- And she is disgusting.
324
00:28:30,822 --> 00:28:33,586
- Disgusting?
- Yeah, she's drab and disgusting.
325
00:28:33,658 --> 00:28:35,250
I think you are wrong, Clouseau.
326
00:28:35,326 --> 00:28:38,625
You see, you and I,
we are men of the world, no?
327
00:28:38,696 --> 00:28:41,995
We've had all these
sexy and glamorous women, right?
328
00:28:43,267 --> 00:28:46,930
Yes, in fact, I believe
you've made a conquest of your own...
329
00:28:48,306 --> 00:28:50,001
...in Miss Solandres.
330
00:28:55,780 --> 00:28:57,805
Clouseau, you are a lover.
331
00:28:58,683 --> 00:29:03,382
And Nicole is a woman for a lifetime,
a woman to have the babies with.
332
00:29:03,454 --> 00:29:06,912
- To have the babies?
- Yes, lots and lots of the babies.
333
00:29:08,159 --> 00:29:10,218
All day long the babies.
334
00:29:12,230 --> 00:29:14,289
All day long the babies?
335
00:29:15,600 --> 00:29:16,862
Ponton.
336
00:29:18,436 --> 00:29:21,371
That Italian and I have locked antlers.
337
00:29:21,439 --> 00:29:24,897
We are like two angry stags
pawing at the ground.
338
00:29:24,976 --> 00:29:26,568
Have we decided on lunch?
339
00:29:26,644 --> 00:29:30,808
Well, I suppose you will be wanting sushi,
my little yellow friend?
340
00:29:33,618 --> 00:29:34,676
What?
341
00:29:36,187 --> 00:29:41,784
Inspector, we never refer to Japanese
people as "our little yellow friends".
342
00:29:41,859 --> 00:29:44,794
- But why?
- Because it is a stereotype.
343
00:29:45,997 --> 00:29:48,557
Inspector, are you prejudiced
against Asians?
344
00:29:48,633 --> 00:29:51,864
Well, of course not.
Except when they drive.
345
00:29:51,936 --> 00:29:53,198
Have you ever seen them drive?
346
00:29:53,271 --> 00:29:55,398
They can hardly see over
the steering wheel.
347
00:29:55,473 --> 00:29:58,931
- Inspector.
- Well, I'm sorry, Mrs. Berenger.
348
00:29:59,010 --> 00:30:02,844
I suppose I'm a bit of a dumb blonde
about this.
349
00:30:02,914 --> 00:30:06,543
- What?
- You must never refer to blondes that way.
350
00:30:06,617 --> 00:30:09,279
- But they are so dumb.
- Oh, my God.
351
00:30:13,658 --> 00:30:15,558
Were you just ogling her?
352
00:30:15,626 --> 00:30:17,856
- No.
- Yes, you were.
353
00:30:17,929 --> 00:30:20,022
I did not.
354
00:30:20,097 --> 00:30:22,327
- You did.
- I did not.
355
00:30:23,000 --> 00:30:24,831
- You did it again.
- No, I didn't.
356
00:30:24,902 --> 00:30:26,529
- Yes, you did. I saw it.
- I did not.
357
00:30:26,604 --> 00:30:28,765
- No, you didn't.
- You did it.
358
00:30:30,775 --> 00:30:32,174
- You did it again!
- No, I didn't.
359
00:30:32,243 --> 00:30:33,267
- Yes, you did.
- I did not.
360
00:30:33,344 --> 00:30:35,278
- Yes, you did.
- Oh, my God, look!
361
00:30:35,346 --> 00:30:36,870
Oh, my God...
362
00:30:51,629 --> 00:30:52,891
Ponton?
363
00:30:53,264 --> 00:30:55,664
I had it out with my wife.
364
00:30:55,733 --> 00:30:58,793
I told her that she must not
question me about my work...
365
00:30:58,869 --> 00:31:02,930
...and that my home life must take
second place to my career.
366
00:31:03,007 --> 00:31:07,444
Good for you. Congratulations!
You are now a real man.
367
00:31:07,511 --> 00:31:09,706
So, then, can I stay here with you?
368
00:31:09,780 --> 00:31:12,681
- What?
- May I stay here? I got kicked out.
369
00:31:13,985 --> 00:31:18,752
- Yes, I suppose. Temporarily.
- Thank you.
370
00:31:18,823 --> 00:31:20,415
It's okay, boys.
371
00:31:23,227 --> 00:31:24,751
What are these?
372
00:31:27,064 --> 00:31:28,053
Ponton?
373
00:31:28,132 --> 00:31:32,660
They are my sons, Louis and Antoine.
They took my side of the argument.
374
00:31:32,737 --> 00:31:34,227
And this is Jacques.
375
00:31:34,305 --> 00:31:37,240
They named him after you.
They idolize you.
376
00:31:44,648 --> 00:31:46,980
Uncle Jacques, what's that?
377
00:31:48,819 --> 00:31:52,346
That is an award given to me
by the President of France.
378
00:31:53,524 --> 00:31:54,786
Go ahead.
379
00:31:57,361 --> 00:32:01,161
- Is that the Pink Panther?
- No, it's a replica.
380
00:32:01,232 --> 00:32:04,633
A copy given to me
for recovering the real diamond...
381
00:32:04,702 --> 00:32:06,465
...and returning it to France.
382
00:32:06,537 --> 00:32:09,165
Let's show Uncle Jacques what we won.
383
00:32:10,775 --> 00:32:14,040
We won these in a competition
in karate school.
384
00:32:14,111 --> 00:32:16,170
That is so cute.
385
00:32:18,716 --> 00:32:21,310
Now, let me show you a real trophy.
386
00:32:23,854 --> 00:32:27,085
One I won at a karate competition
just recently.
387
00:32:28,459 --> 00:32:30,051
Wow!
388
00:32:30,127 --> 00:32:32,357
- You like karate?
- We love it.
389
00:32:33,197 --> 00:32:34,630
Remember, boys.
390
00:32:34,698 --> 00:32:41,194
The secret to a successful karate
attack is the element of surprise.
391
00:32:50,014 --> 00:32:51,811
- Good one.
- Thank you.
392
00:32:55,886 --> 00:33:00,016
To find the Tornado,
we must consider his motives.
393
00:33:00,091 --> 00:33:03,959
I'm worried that right now,
the thief is trying to sell the goods.
394
00:33:04,028 --> 00:33:05,325
Right.
395
00:33:05,396 --> 00:33:08,524
"Hey, buddy, do you want to buy
the Shroud of Turin?"
396
00:33:08,599 --> 00:33:12,262
No. These items are too famous to be sold.
397
00:33:12,336 --> 00:33:16,397
Only the Pink Panther can be cut up
and sold as smaller gems.
398
00:33:16,474 --> 00:33:18,999
I suspect that's what he wants.
399
00:33:19,076 --> 00:33:20,737
I have something.
400
00:33:22,313 --> 00:33:28,411
This says the computer that hacked
into the museum is located in Rome.
401
00:33:28,786 --> 00:33:31,949
- Rome?
- Yes. Is something wrong?
402
00:33:32,823 --> 00:33:35,951
No. No. Rome means nothing to me.
403
00:33:38,129 --> 00:33:39,562
I mean...
404
00:33:46,270 --> 00:33:48,864
Rome? Do you know who lives in Rome?
405
00:33:48,939 --> 00:33:52,170
- Alonso Avellaneda!
- The black market art dealer.
406
00:33:52,243 --> 00:33:55,041
The man rumored to be
the Tornado's fence.
407
00:34:13,497 --> 00:34:14,691
There's always been a suspicion...
408
00:34:14,765 --> 00:34:18,292
...that Avellaneda's not just the Tornado's
fence, but the Tornado himself.
409
00:34:18,369 --> 00:34:19,495
He is the right age.
410
00:34:19,570 --> 00:34:21,800
Do we have a sample of his DNA?
411
00:34:21,872 --> 00:34:25,330
Not yet, but we should be in Rome
in one hour.
412
00:34:25,409 --> 00:34:27,274
Where is our pilot?
413
00:34:27,344 --> 00:34:30,802
I don't trust any other pilot
for my plane but myself.
414
00:34:31,682 --> 00:34:33,115
Your plane.
415
00:34:34,218 --> 00:34:37,153
Nicoletta,
would you like to be my co-pilot?
416
00:34:40,858 --> 00:34:43,019
- Come.
- Okay.
417
00:34:56,207 --> 00:35:00,576
- Would I be disturbing you if I joined you?
- No, no. Please disturb me.
418
00:35:05,549 --> 00:35:08,450
I've been thinking a lot
about what you said outside the museum...
419
00:35:08,519 --> 00:35:11,181
...about the psychology of the criminal.
420
00:35:11,989 --> 00:35:13,354
The "why?"
421
00:35:15,359 --> 00:35:18,624
Perhaps romantic disappointment.
422
00:35:19,396 --> 00:35:24,459
A foolish young woman
who leaves a man for a younger man.
423
00:35:25,836 --> 00:35:27,827
That could never happen.
424
00:35:28,272 --> 00:35:30,001
But of course.
425
00:35:30,074 --> 00:35:32,133
What a man such as that should do...
426
00:35:32,209 --> 00:35:37,306
...is start a new romance
with someone more appreciative.
427
00:35:43,454 --> 00:35:47,823
That is so funny. "Start a new romance".
428
00:35:48,359 --> 00:35:52,386
I'm not quite sure what you mean,
but that is funny.
429
00:35:57,334 --> 00:36:02,203
It appears that Inspector Clouseau
does not find Miss Solandres drab.
430
00:36:06,944 --> 00:36:07,968
"Drab"?
431
00:36:08,045 --> 00:36:10,946
The very word
that he used to describe you.
432
00:36:11,749 --> 00:36:14,309
- He called me drab?
- And disgusting.
433
00:36:15,452 --> 00:36:16,817
Disgusting?
434
00:36:19,490 --> 00:36:20,821
Thank you.
435
00:36:36,206 --> 00:36:39,141
Hey, Ponton.
Tell me more about Inspector Clouseau.
436
00:36:39,209 --> 00:36:42,906
He's a brilliant man, unorthodox, oblique.
437
00:36:43,580 --> 00:36:45,673
But I can tell you
with absolute confidence...
438
00:36:45,749 --> 00:36:48,445
...he's the man who will solve this case.
439
00:36:48,519 --> 00:36:51,283
Ponton-san, you are crazy.
440
00:36:53,791 --> 00:36:56,624
If Clouseau solves this case,
I am perfectly willing to run around...
441
00:36:56,694 --> 00:36:59,993
...like a bare-bummed idiot
wearing nothing but a tutu.
442
00:37:02,232 --> 00:37:04,359
Well, let's talk about Avellaneda.
443
00:37:04,435 --> 00:37:08,098
- What are his proclivities?
- He's an art connoisseur...
444
00:37:08,172 --> 00:37:09,799
...but because of his
questionable dealings...
445
00:37:09,873 --> 00:37:12,603
...he was thrown out of Spain
and must live here.
446
00:37:12,676 --> 00:37:15,907
You see?
He has squandered his reputation...
447
00:37:15,979 --> 00:37:18,743
...and he is forced to live in the woods
like an animal...
448
00:37:18,816 --> 00:37:20,875
...with the shame of being a criminal.
449
00:37:20,951 --> 00:37:25,752
If there is one absolute truth in
this world, it is that crime does not pay.
450
00:37:35,699 --> 00:37:38,224
You say the bullet hole is
behind his right shoulder?
451
00:37:38,302 --> 00:37:39,326
Yes.
452
00:37:39,403 --> 00:37:43,931
Then all we have to do is figure out a way
to get him to remove his shirt.
453
00:37:52,750 --> 00:37:54,809
I was half expecting you.
454
00:37:55,519 --> 00:37:57,885
Are you the so-called "Dream Team"?
455
00:37:57,955 --> 00:38:00,719
And who is it
who is inquiring of us who we are?
456
00:38:00,791 --> 00:38:05,455
I am Alonso Avellaneda.
Is this more of that Tornado nonsense?
457
00:38:05,529 --> 00:38:08,555
We shall see who is the one
who will be saying nonsensical things...
458
00:38:08,632 --> 00:38:10,964
...that are something of nonsense.
459
00:38:15,873 --> 00:38:19,866
Well, I suppose I must bow
to the inevitable.
460
00:38:19,943 --> 00:38:23,037
Please, come inside.
I'll join you in a moment.
461
00:38:33,657 --> 00:38:35,056
Nicole.
462
00:38:35,125 --> 00:38:40,222
While the Dream Team plays its
little games, I am going to snoop around.
463
00:38:45,536 --> 00:38:46,935
Who cares?
464
00:38:50,541 --> 00:38:55,911
So, gentlemen and ladies,
please make yourselves at home.
465
00:38:57,147 --> 00:38:59,012
Now, how can I help you?
466
00:38:59,082 --> 00:39:02,848
Seсor Avellaneda,
where were you last Friday evening?
467
00:39:02,920 --> 00:39:05,616
Dining with my daughter and my ex-wife.
468
00:39:06,957 --> 00:39:08,424
Don't believe me, call them.
469
00:39:08,492 --> 00:39:10,050
Why call them?
470
00:39:10,127 --> 00:39:13,995
They already lied for you
on the stand 10 years ago.
471
00:39:14,064 --> 00:39:15,929
I am not the Tornado.
472
00:39:15,999 --> 00:39:18,695
Do you mind
if I examine your computer system?
473
00:39:18,769 --> 00:39:20,896
Be my guest. I have nothing to hide.
474
00:39:20,971 --> 00:39:23,633
Sometimes things hide in plain sight.
475
00:39:29,146 --> 00:39:30,909
My security system.
476
00:39:43,460 --> 00:39:45,485
Answer this question.
477
00:39:45,562 --> 00:39:49,328
In the past, you admitted to dealings
with II Tornado?
478
00:39:49,399 --> 00:39:51,890
Yes, but that was 10 years ago.
479
00:39:51,969 --> 00:39:55,200
Besides, I never saw his face.
480
00:39:55,272 --> 00:39:58,571
How did you conduct these transactions
if you never saw his face?
481
00:39:58,642 --> 00:40:02,305
He was in disguise.
He always wore a mask.
482
00:40:02,379 --> 00:40:05,371
Did you call him Zorro?
Or the Power Ranger?
483
00:40:05,449 --> 00:40:07,974
Come, come, seсor Avellaneda,
you expect us to believe...
484
00:40:08,051 --> 00:40:10,849
...that two grown men
do millions of dollars of business...
485
00:40:10,921 --> 00:40:12,821
...with each other
and you never saw his face?
486
00:40:12,890 --> 00:40:14,482
Perhaps I saw him once.
487
00:40:14,558 --> 00:40:18,153
Did it look something like this?
Or this? How about this?
488
00:40:18,228 --> 00:40:22,096
No, I've told you. I am not the Tornado.
489
00:40:22,165 --> 00:40:23,962
How did you pay him?
490
00:40:24,801 --> 00:40:27,702
With deposits into Swiss bank accounts.
491
00:40:27,771 --> 00:40:30,103
Numbered. Untraceable.
492
00:40:31,975 --> 00:40:33,875
I understand.
493
00:40:33,944 --> 00:40:38,142
Look, I know my answers
are less than satisfactory.
494
00:40:39,249 --> 00:40:41,217
I realize that.
495
00:40:41,285 --> 00:40:43,651
Does this mean
I must spend the rest of my life...
496
00:40:43,720 --> 00:40:45,415
...living under a cloud of suspicion?
497
00:40:45,489 --> 00:40:48,117
- Forgive my intrusion.
- Yes.
498
00:40:48,191 --> 00:40:50,785
There is one way to prove your innocence.
499
00:40:50,861 --> 00:40:52,852
Back in 1996, while perpetrating a crime...
500
00:40:52,930 --> 00:40:56,559
Yes, yes, yes. He received a bullet wound
in the shoulder.
501
00:40:58,569 --> 00:41:00,628
Is this what it's come to?
502
00:41:01,872 --> 00:41:05,535
That I must strip down
and remove my clothes...
503
00:41:05,609 --> 00:41:07,770
...in the sanctity of my own home...
504
00:41:07,844 --> 00:41:12,281
...before a group of people I've only
just met just to prove my innocence?
505
00:41:12,349 --> 00:41:14,249
Well, it wouldn't hurt.
506
00:41:15,819 --> 00:41:18,379
Fine. Let's get it over with, then.
507
00:41:30,701 --> 00:41:33,226
I believe it was the right shoulder.
508
00:41:41,912 --> 00:41:46,940
So I hope this proves beyond doubt
that I am not the Tornado.
509
00:41:47,017 --> 00:41:49,542
We will have to leave you in peace.
510
00:42:16,413 --> 00:42:19,871
He's already shown us his shoulders.
There is no wound.
511
00:42:21,652 --> 00:42:22,949
He did?
512
00:42:26,089 --> 00:42:28,523
- The man is guilty.
- There's no physical evidence.
513
00:42:28,592 --> 00:42:29,752
Clouseau!
514
00:42:29,826 --> 00:42:32,989
He removed his shirt twice,
and there was no bullet hole.
515
00:42:33,063 --> 00:42:35,964
Haven't you ever heard
of cosmetic surgery?
516
00:42:38,368 --> 00:42:40,893
Yes. Of course you have.
517
00:42:46,877 --> 00:42:51,075
Clouseau Inspector,
I even checked all the house's computers.
518
00:42:51,148 --> 00:42:53,446
None of them are used
to hack into the museum.
519
00:42:53,517 --> 00:42:54,779
Still...
520
00:42:55,385 --> 00:42:58,616
Clouseau, can't you see
what's plain in front of you?
521
00:42:58,689 --> 00:43:01,385
Your unrelenting stubbornness
is maddening.
522
00:43:01,458 --> 00:43:06,225
And I'm telling you I sense
the presence of the Tornado in that house.
523
00:43:15,205 --> 00:43:17,196
They don't know anything.
524
00:43:18,475 --> 00:43:21,603
That blasted bullet wound. It's my mark.
525
00:43:24,047 --> 00:43:25,947
One day they'll find me.
526
00:43:26,016 --> 00:43:28,109
You're in no danger, Laurence.
527
00:43:28,185 --> 00:43:30,210
This is all very strange.
528
00:43:31,455 --> 00:43:33,446
I even know one of them.
529
00:43:34,124 --> 00:43:35,352
You do?
530
00:43:37,027 --> 00:43:39,018
- Which one?
- You know me.
531
00:43:40,731 --> 00:43:42,426
Isn't it obvious?
532
00:43:48,839 --> 00:43:50,773
Inspector, excuse me.
533
00:43:50,841 --> 00:43:55,835
Are you familiar with a Spanish restaurant
here in Rome called La Plata de Nada?
534
00:43:55,912 --> 00:43:58,107
Know it? I destroyed it.
535
00:43:58,181 --> 00:44:02,117
I found this in a jammed paper shredder.
536
00:44:02,619 --> 00:44:06,350
8:00 tonight.
The grand re-opening of La Plata de Nada.
537
00:44:06,423 --> 00:44:08,414
And I thought, "Why would Avellaneda...
538
00:44:08,492 --> 00:44:12,189
"shred a simple reminder
of a dinner appointment?"
539
00:44:12,262 --> 00:44:14,093
Good work, Ponton.
540
00:44:15,031 --> 00:44:18,262
- So what should we do?
- Our jobs, Ponton.
541
00:44:18,335 --> 00:44:23,398
We investigate, see who he's eating with.
Perhaps the Tornado.
542
00:44:24,541 --> 00:44:25,633
You go on ahead.
543
00:44:25,709 --> 00:44:29,839
Ponton and I will get a taxi
and do a little sightseeing.
544
00:44:38,488 --> 00:44:44,188
This stakeout was a good idea, Ponton.
Fortunately, I'm an expert lip-reader.
545
00:44:44,261 --> 00:44:50,393
He's saying,
"Never retune a wet piano."
546
00:44:50,467 --> 00:44:51,491
Why is he saying that?
547
00:44:51,568 --> 00:44:55,095
No, he is saying, "My wife will not be back
in Italy until Sunday".
548
00:44:55,172 --> 00:44:58,938
- No wonder he shredded the message.
- What is all this?
549
00:44:59,009 --> 00:45:01,204
Before they opened tonight, I snuck in...
550
00:45:01,278 --> 00:45:04,679
...found out which table he'd reserved,
and planted a bug.
551
00:45:04,748 --> 00:45:08,548
But how did you find out which table
they would be seated at?
552
00:45:10,120 --> 00:45:12,588
You rubbed your fingers together.
553
00:45:13,156 --> 00:45:14,885
That is surprising.
554
00:45:19,496 --> 00:45:22,090
What is she doing here with him?
555
00:45:25,101 --> 00:45:26,932
I'm sorry, Inspector.
556
00:45:27,437 --> 00:45:29,234
We've got to find out
what they are saying.
557
00:45:29,306 --> 00:45:30,739
Why?
558
00:45:30,807 --> 00:45:34,265
We've got to move the bug
from that table to that table.
559
00:45:34,344 --> 00:45:37,472
- How?
- Let me handle it.
560
00:45:42,552 --> 00:45:44,884
Hello. Remember me?
561
00:45:49,192 --> 00:45:50,989
Don't you come back.
562
00:46:18,555 --> 00:46:20,921
What's wrong?
You don't like this restaurant?
563
00:46:20,991 --> 00:46:24,119
Oh, no.
No, I have been here one time before.
564
00:46:24,194 --> 00:46:25,752
It's very nice.
565
00:48:48,471 --> 00:48:50,837
There. It is out.
566
00:49:50,333 --> 00:49:54,030
We've been able to confirm
that the Pope's ring has been stolen.
567
00:49:54,104 --> 00:49:58,507
Ironically, the Dream Team
was no less than five miles away in Rome.
568
00:49:58,575 --> 00:50:02,944
The Italian people are outraged that
the Tornado was able to pull this off...
569
00:50:03,012 --> 00:50:04,843
...right under their noses.
570
00:50:15,225 --> 00:50:16,283
Mr. Clouseau.
571
00:50:16,359 --> 00:50:19,089
Mr. Pepperidge, was the Dream Team
sleeping last night during the theft?
572
00:50:19,162 --> 00:50:20,151
No comment.
573
00:50:20,230 --> 00:50:22,790
Do you think
they will ever recover the ring?
574
00:50:22,866 --> 00:50:25,232
If I made a comment after I'd said,
"No comment,"
575
00:50:25,301 --> 00:50:27,792
I'd look like a complete ass, wouldn't I?
576
00:51:04,407 --> 00:51:07,604
Do not worry.
Vicenzo Roccara Squarcialupi Brancaleone...
577
00:51:07,677 --> 00:51:09,440
...swears to you by all that is holy...
578
00:51:09,512 --> 00:51:13,004
...that St. Peter's ring
will be restored to the Church.
579
00:51:13,082 --> 00:51:15,209
Please sit down.
580
00:51:17,287 --> 00:51:18,686
Now, Mr. Pope...
581
00:51:18,755 --> 00:51:22,486
...do you happen to know right now
the whereabouts of your hat?
582
00:51:24,494 --> 00:51:27,554
- My hat?
- Yes, your big, pointy hat.
583
00:51:27,630 --> 00:51:29,257
No, I don't know.
584
00:51:30,633 --> 00:51:35,900
Then I am probably sitting on it.
I thought I felt a little...
585
00:51:41,711 --> 00:51:43,406
This can be fixed.
586
00:51:46,416 --> 00:51:47,940
As good as new.
587
00:51:48,885 --> 00:51:50,079
Now...
588
00:51:53,056 --> 00:51:55,024
How do we know
it wasn't you who stole the ring...
589
00:51:55,091 --> 00:51:57,924
...so you could collect
on the insurance money?
590
00:51:57,994 --> 00:52:01,361
- I am the Pope.
- Forgive me, Mr. Pope...
591
00:52:02,498 --> 00:52:05,058
...it's just that sometimes
when I speak so forcefully...
592
00:52:05,134 --> 00:52:09,628
...people just crack instantly.
Now, was the ring insured?
593
00:52:10,240 --> 00:52:12,572
The ring is priceless. It cannot be insured.
594
00:52:12,642 --> 00:52:16,100
- So you had no reason to steal the ring.
- I own the ring.
595
00:52:16,179 --> 00:52:20,878
Perhaps you wanted to sell the ring
so you could live in a big, fancy house.
596
00:52:21,517 --> 00:52:23,041
I kind of do.
597
00:52:26,222 --> 00:52:31,216
Now, let me reconstruct the crime.
You came into the room when?
598
00:52:31,294 --> 00:52:33,819
- At 9:00.
- And what was the first thing you did?
599
00:52:33,896 --> 00:52:37,730
I went out on the balcony
to admire the Lord's handiwork.
600
00:52:37,800 --> 00:52:42,430
The moon that night was so beautiful.
It made me close to the Lord.
601
00:52:42,505 --> 00:52:47,636
I'm picking up on something.
You're a very spiritual man, aren't you?
602
00:52:48,678 --> 00:52:53,581
It's part of my job to read people.
I think I'm quite good at it, too.
603
00:52:55,218 --> 00:52:57,778
- And then what did you do?
- I removed my robes.
604
00:52:57,854 --> 00:53:00,152
- And you put them...
- In the closet.
605
00:53:00,223 --> 00:53:01,918
- May I?
- Certainly.
606
00:53:05,595 --> 00:53:07,722
You know,
if you organized your closets by color...
607
00:53:07,797 --> 00:53:10,265
...it would save you time
in your rush to get to work in the morning.
608
00:53:10,333 --> 00:53:12,927
It's what I do, and it saves me time.
609
00:53:13,002 --> 00:53:15,095
Now, in order to better
visualize the crime...
610
00:53:15,171 --> 00:53:18,470
I'm going to place myself in your position.
611
00:53:18,541 --> 00:53:20,975
- With your permission.
- Certainly.
612
00:53:39,028 --> 00:53:44,432
So, I come home, it's 9:00 p. M.
"I think I'll go look at the moon".
613
00:53:44,500 --> 00:53:47,867
I am going out onto the balcony.
614
00:53:50,540 --> 00:53:54,340
I walk out on the balcony.
I am now out on the balcony.
615
00:54:04,520 --> 00:54:08,684
I am looking at the moon.
I am looking at the moon.
616
00:54:08,758 --> 00:54:13,195
I'm feeling very, very spiritual.
I come back in.
617
00:54:15,865 --> 00:54:18,925
- And what did you do next?
- I went out for the second time.
618
00:54:19,001 --> 00:54:22,129
You went out a second time
to look at the moon.
619
00:54:24,474 --> 00:54:26,066
It's the Pope.
620
00:54:27,877 --> 00:54:31,711
Looking at the moon,
18 seconds has gone by.
621
00:54:34,517 --> 00:54:38,419
18 seconds is enough time
for the thief to have gained entrance.
622
00:54:38,488 --> 00:54:41,821
Now, you see why it is important
to re-create the events.
623
00:54:41,891 --> 00:54:46,385
Or perhaps the thief was hiding
in a ledge or recess.
624
00:54:46,462 --> 00:54:50,592
Or perhaps he was clinging
to the underside of the...
625
00:55:14,690 --> 00:55:17,682
Thank you, God. Thank you.
626
00:55:17,760 --> 00:55:20,820
Chief Inspector,
Joubert wants to speak to you.
627
00:55:21,130 --> 00:55:22,825
He wants Clouseau off the case.
628
00:55:22,899 --> 00:55:24,332
- No!
- No?
629
00:55:24,400 --> 00:55:27,801
No, let's wait till he does
something really embarrassing.
630
00:55:55,431 --> 00:55:56,625
Home.
631
00:56:00,937 --> 00:56:02,632
- Surprise attack!
- Surprise attack!
632
00:56:02,705 --> 00:56:06,232
- Not now, I'm depressed.
- Perfect for our advantage.
633
00:56:09,178 --> 00:56:13,740
The secret to an attack
is the element of surprise, remember?
634
00:56:41,043 --> 00:56:44,945
Now I will teach you
who is the karate master.
635
00:56:56,425 --> 00:56:59,155
Now watch what I will do to your head.
636
00:56:59,228 --> 00:57:00,820
Now, Antoine.
637
00:57:12,141 --> 00:57:14,439
Let's talk about this, boys.
638
00:57:46,943 --> 00:57:51,471
Come, little ones. All is forgiven.
639
00:57:56,252 --> 00:57:58,584
Ponton, can we see Clouseau?
640
00:57:58,654 --> 00:58:00,212
Is the French idiot home?
641
00:58:00,289 --> 00:58:02,189
How does he feel about his disgrace?
642
00:58:02,258 --> 00:58:05,091
Inspector Clouseau
is the consummate professional.
643
00:58:05,161 --> 00:58:07,891
He always exhibits grace under pressure.
644
00:58:09,765 --> 00:58:11,892
Die, little piglets!
645
00:58:21,377 --> 00:58:25,711
My God, do you understand
what you have done that is wrong?
646
00:58:25,781 --> 00:58:28,215
- Just remind me.
- You cannot beat up children...
647
00:58:28,284 --> 00:58:32,812
- And call them piglets.
- The world is changing so fast.
648
00:58:32,888 --> 00:58:36,449
Inspector, you have failed to improve
at every opportunity.
649
00:58:36,525 --> 00:58:40,757
You are the most small-minded nitwit
I have ever encountered.
650
00:58:40,830 --> 00:58:45,631
- I am sure I can do better.
- Very well, we'll give you one more try.
651
00:58:46,435 --> 00:58:50,735
I'm going to hold up a series of images,
and I want you to tell me what you see.
652
00:58:50,806 --> 00:58:54,105
Just say the first thing
that comes into your mind.
653
00:58:54,176 --> 00:58:55,939
A drunken Irishman.
654
00:58:56,712 --> 00:58:58,907
An Englishman with bad teeth.
655
00:58:59,548 --> 00:59:01,812
A San Francisco Nancy boy.
656
00:59:02,752 --> 00:59:05,812
A Polish army officer driving a septic tank.
657
00:59:05,888 --> 00:59:08,220
Where did you get these cards?
658
00:59:09,692 --> 00:59:13,719
It's in every newspaper all over the world.
We're all being made to look like idiots.
659
00:59:13,796 --> 00:59:16,629
Reputations built up over a lifetime
utterly ruined.
660
00:59:16,699 --> 00:59:19,862
I had to quit being a Buddhist
because I feel so much hate.
661
00:59:19,935 --> 00:59:21,800
He sat on the Pope's hat!
662
00:59:21,871 --> 00:59:26,205
Look, he recovered the Pink Panther once,
and I believe he can do it again.
663
00:59:26,275 --> 00:59:29,733
If he solves this case, I'm perfectly
willing to run around for 24 hours...
664
00:59:29,812 --> 00:59:34,511
...wearing nothing but a tutu
and carrying a big, pink, fluffy handbag.
665
00:59:34,583 --> 00:59:37,984
I say we take a vote to get rid of him.
All in favor?
666
00:59:41,624 --> 00:59:44,491
Whatever it is, count me in.
667
00:59:45,294 --> 00:59:49,458
Clouseau, while you were
falling off of the Pope's balcony...
668
00:59:49,532 --> 00:59:53,662
...dressed as the Pope,
I discovered a key piece of evidence.
669
00:59:53,736 --> 00:59:56,671
And what is this key piece of evidence?
670
00:59:57,907 --> 00:59:59,067
A key.
671
00:59:59,141 --> 01:00:03,202
I found this on the Pope's bedroom floor.
Something, of course, you overlooked.
672
01:00:03,279 --> 01:00:04,837
That could mean anything.
673
01:00:04,914 --> 01:00:09,214
But if this key is so important,
I will take it and duly examine it.
674
01:00:09,285 --> 01:00:11,150
Inspector Clouseau.
675
01:00:12,888 --> 01:00:18,827
It is my not-so-sad duty to inform you
that you have been voted off of the team.
676
01:00:21,297 --> 01:00:22,525
Off the team?
677
01:00:22,598 --> 01:00:25,567
You are no longer part
of this investigation.
678
01:00:29,071 --> 01:00:30,299
Cheerio.
679
01:00:40,116 --> 01:00:41,310
Nicole.
680
01:00:44,253 --> 01:00:46,187
- Nicole?
- Inspector.
681
01:00:48,390 --> 01:00:50,551
I was just returning a file.
682
01:00:51,927 --> 01:00:55,363
What are you doing in Nicole's office?
683
01:00:55,431 --> 01:00:58,832
- When I got fired...
- You thought Nicole was the one person...
684
01:00:58,901 --> 01:01:03,099
- You could share it with.
- Well, we do go back.
685
01:01:05,474 --> 01:01:07,635
Story of my life...
686
01:01:07,710 --> 01:01:12,204
...the men I'm interested in
aren't the ones interested in me.
687
01:01:12,281 --> 01:01:16,843
Really? I would think all men
would be interested in you.
688
01:01:17,486 --> 01:01:20,250
- Why do you say that?
- Because...
689
01:01:29,832 --> 01:01:34,792
- ...you are very attractive.
- I will see you in my office in five.
690
01:01:41,377 --> 01:01:43,777
But really, there is no one?
691
01:01:46,482 --> 01:01:51,112
Frankly speaking, the one big love
of my life didn't quite work out.
692
01:01:51,187 --> 01:01:52,779
You poor thing.
693
01:01:56,792 --> 01:01:58,089
Nicole!
694
01:01:59,094 --> 01:02:03,690
No, no, no, don't let me interrupt.
I only have a message from Vicenzo.
695
01:02:03,766 --> 01:02:06,530
He wants you both at this address,
immediately.
696
01:02:06,602 --> 01:02:09,469
He has decided he needs my expertise.
697
01:02:09,538 --> 01:02:11,028
No. They've solved the case.
698
01:02:11,106 --> 01:02:13,597
- What?
- They've solved the case.
699
01:02:22,451 --> 01:02:24,749
Inspector, welcome.
700
01:02:24,820 --> 01:02:26,720
Even though
we've had certain disagreements...
701
01:02:26,789 --> 01:02:31,021
...we are willing to share the glory
with you out of our respect for la Francia.
702
01:02:31,093 --> 01:02:33,687
Pepperidge examined the key
and knew right away...
703
01:02:33,762 --> 01:02:35,662
...it was made by a French locksmith.
704
01:02:35,731 --> 01:02:39,497
Kenji did research on the locksmiths
in Paris who sell this brand.
705
01:02:39,568 --> 01:02:43,402
We asked for a list of addresses
and we found this apartment.
706
01:02:44,273 --> 01:02:47,902
When we got here,
we found the owner licking the carpet.
707
01:02:50,679 --> 01:02:52,977
His name is Laurence Milliken.
708
01:02:53,682 --> 01:02:55,513
And the stolen items?
709
01:03:02,725 --> 01:03:04,522
The Shroud of Turin!
710
01:03:05,661 --> 01:03:08,926
We should have it dry-cleaned
before we return it.
711
01:03:09,865 --> 01:03:13,494
The Pope's ring.
His wife will be happy to have that back.
712
01:03:15,404 --> 01:03:19,067
- And where is the Pink Panther?
- Unfortunately, that cannot be recovered.
713
01:03:19,141 --> 01:03:20,608
No Pink Panther?
714
01:03:20,676 --> 01:03:23,804
- He explained in his suicide note.
- Yes.
715
01:03:26,081 --> 01:03:28,777
"Life had become horribly dull
and uninteresting.
716
01:03:28,851 --> 01:03:31,718
"Nothing matched the excitement
of stealing great treasures...
717
01:03:31,787 --> 01:03:33,084
"so I returned...
718
01:03:33,155 --> 01:03:35,919
"but I found that even stealing
no longer interested me.
719
01:03:35,991 --> 01:03:39,051
"Without a purpose,
I no longer wish to live.
720
01:03:39,128 --> 01:03:43,497
"I am returning every treasure but one.
The Pink Panther.
721
01:03:43,565 --> 01:03:45,590
"Having it in my possession
for even a few days...
722
01:03:45,668 --> 01:03:48,330
"made me realize its fabulous beauty.
723
01:03:48,404 --> 01:03:51,737
"No one must have it but me,
so I destroyed it.
724
01:03:51,807 --> 01:03:55,334
"The Pink Panther is dust,
a final revenge."
725
01:03:55,411 --> 01:03:58,244
"Laurence Milliken, the Tornado".
726
01:04:02,017 --> 01:04:06,215
I spent four years researching and writing
my book. I hoped to meet him alive.
727
01:04:06,288 --> 01:04:09,382
The Tornado was an expert
on gems and their value?
728
01:04:09,458 --> 01:04:11,688
Yes, in fact, Milliken was the author...
729
01:04:11,760 --> 01:04:14,456
...of the most authoritative book
on the subject.
730
01:04:14,530 --> 01:04:19,229
This man did not commit these crimes.
The case has not been solved.
731
01:04:19,301 --> 01:04:23,294
But, look, there's the wound
from 10 years ago.
732
01:04:23,372 --> 01:04:25,897
- I stake my reputation on it.
- Well, that's not much.
733
01:04:25,975 --> 01:04:28,136
- The media are outside.
- Then I will announce...
734
01:04:28,210 --> 01:04:31,111
- That we have solved the case.
- I wouldn't.
735
01:04:32,114 --> 01:04:34,912
- I will.
- I wouldn't do it.
736
01:04:35,584 --> 01:04:39,111
- I am going to.
- I wouldn't.
737
01:04:45,294 --> 01:04:49,993
I am delighted to announce
that we have found II Tornado.
738
01:04:50,065 --> 01:04:52,329
The dead man in the apartment...
739
01:04:52,401 --> 01:04:55,393
...is indubitably
the perpetrator of these crimes.
740
01:04:55,471 --> 01:04:59,032
Actually, one of us disagrees
with this hypothesis.
741
01:04:59,108 --> 01:05:01,975
I am sure that Milliken is not the thief.
742
01:05:07,316 --> 01:05:10,979
Hold it. We're getting the report
on the DNA evidence.
743
01:05:11,053 --> 01:05:14,750
The DNA taken from the body
of Laurence Milliken today...
744
01:05:14,823 --> 01:05:18,520
...and the DNA taken 10 years ago
from the blood of the Tornado...
745
01:05:18,594 --> 01:05:22,394
...are a 100% match.
746
01:05:23,732 --> 01:05:26,394
The man inside is the Tornado.
747
01:05:33,108 --> 01:05:35,770
I'd like to thank my colleagues
for their assistance...
748
01:05:35,844 --> 01:05:39,075
...and especially one of your own
here in la Francia.
749
01:05:39,148 --> 01:05:43,175
My most heartfelt appreciation
to Nicoletta.
750
01:05:46,155 --> 01:05:49,591
You are a beacon of light
in a forest of darkness.
751
01:05:49,658 --> 01:05:55,187
Nicole is no less a thief than II Tornado
because she has stolen this.
752
01:06:22,024 --> 01:06:23,685
Your mama is here.
753
01:06:24,626 --> 01:06:26,856
Say goodbye to Uncle Jacques.
754
01:06:27,362 --> 01:06:30,763
- Goodbye, Uncle Jacques.
- We love you, Uncle Jacques.
755
01:06:31,433 --> 01:06:34,664
You are two fine, young, little pig persons.
756
01:06:35,838 --> 01:06:37,965
- Goodbye, Papa.
- Goodbye.
757
01:06:38,040 --> 01:06:41,999
- When will you be coming home, Papa?
- I'm not sure.
758
01:06:42,077 --> 01:06:43,305
Goodbye.
759
01:06:50,686 --> 01:06:54,918
Well, Ponton,
we are two available men alone in Paris...
760
01:06:54,990 --> 01:06:57,584
...the most exciting city in the world.
761
01:06:58,527 --> 01:07:00,495
How should we spend our evening?
762
01:07:03,532 --> 01:07:06,865
- What sort of shampoo is this?
- Jojoba.
763
01:07:06,935 --> 01:07:08,698
- Jojoba.
- Jojoba.
764
01:07:09,671 --> 01:07:11,639
Let me see the bottle.
765
01:07:15,043 --> 01:07:19,104
- It's spelled "Jojoba".
- It's pronounced "Hohoba".
766
01:07:19,181 --> 01:07:23,447
It's spelled "Jojoba,"
but it's pronounced "Hohoba".
767
01:07:23,519 --> 01:07:26,716
- "Hohoba".
- Why would they do something like that?
768
01:07:59,421 --> 01:08:03,858
Well, Ponton, I think our bachelor night
is going very well. Who needs women?
769
01:08:03,926 --> 01:08:06,156
I'm going back home
to my wife and children.
770
01:08:06,228 --> 01:08:11,996
- What? What brought this on?
- You. I don't wish to end up... I mean...
771
01:08:12,067 --> 01:08:16,003
I have decided that love and family
must not come second.
772
01:08:16,071 --> 01:08:19,370
If I may, Inspector,
look what that thinking has done for you.
773
01:08:19,441 --> 01:08:23,605
What? I'm very happy living alone
with my various shampoos.
774
01:08:23,679 --> 01:08:27,547
Inspector, I still think you are
the best detective in the world.
775
01:08:27,616 --> 01:08:32,485
Yet, when it comes to love, you never see
what is staring you right in the face.
776
01:08:33,222 --> 01:08:37,818
Take Nicole, for example.
Do you know the color of her eyes?
777
01:08:37,893 --> 01:08:40,885
Her pet's name? Her favorite song?
778
01:08:40,963 --> 01:08:44,956
You can recite an entire section
of every statute in French criminal law...
779
01:08:45,033 --> 01:08:49,060
...but you don't know the first thing
about the woman who loves you.
780
01:08:52,841 --> 01:08:54,604
Her eyes are brown.
781
01:08:56,979 --> 01:08:59,311
She loves the smell of vanilla.
782
01:09:00,882 --> 01:09:03,282
She's allergic to shellfish.
783
01:09:03,352 --> 01:09:07,379
She has a small scar on her ankle,
which I gave her.
784
01:09:08,590 --> 01:09:11,684
She loves her cats, Mindy and Wendy...
785
01:09:12,794 --> 01:09:19,063
...and Cindy, Delores, Frank,
Maxime, Caligula and Louise.
786
01:09:20,335 --> 01:09:22,929
And she does not think she is pretty.
787
01:09:23,739 --> 01:09:26,503
And I can never tell her she is pretty.
788
01:09:26,575 --> 01:09:29,100
- Otherwise...
- Otherwise what?
789
01:09:30,846 --> 01:09:36,876
If she knew how pretty she is, she
might choose someone other than me.
790
01:09:39,288 --> 01:09:40,983
- Ponton.
- Yes?
791
01:09:42,557 --> 01:09:44,115
I need a hug.
792
01:09:45,994 --> 01:09:47,086
Okay.
793
01:09:48,764 --> 01:09:50,664
And now, conditioner.
794
01:09:54,069 --> 01:09:58,529
After more than a decade, the infamous
Tornado has finally been unmasked.
795
01:09:58,607 --> 01:10:01,337
Thanks to the work
of the international Dream Team.
796
01:10:01,410 --> 01:10:05,278
Their success is being celebrated tonight
in a very exclusive event.
797
01:10:05,347 --> 01:10:10,046
Let's go live now to the Petit Palais
in Paris, where the gala is underway.
798
01:10:21,830 --> 01:10:23,457
So, tell us about the case.
799
01:10:23,532 --> 01:10:26,524
This was really not
one of my most challenging cases.
800
01:10:26,601 --> 01:10:28,296
I'm surprised it even took us this long...
801
01:10:28,370 --> 01:10:31,271
My powers of observation
are so finely tuned by this point...
802
01:10:31,340 --> 01:10:34,639
...that just one look at any situation,
and ideas come flooding into me.
803
01:10:34,710 --> 01:10:37,270
Modern technology makes
the modern criminal obsolete.
804
01:10:37,346 --> 01:10:39,712
And what about the Pink Panther?
805
01:10:43,352 --> 01:10:48,449
- Too bad it was destroyed.
- Yes, we're very sorry about that.
806
01:10:48,523 --> 01:10:50,081
Three out of four isn't bad.
807
01:10:50,158 --> 01:10:52,217
-75%.
- Yes, brilliant.
808
01:11:05,107 --> 01:11:07,541
- Inspector.
- Miss Solandres.
809
01:11:07,609 --> 01:11:09,634
- Quite a snarl here.
- Yes, I know.
810
01:11:09,711 --> 01:11:13,670
A spot just opened up. Take it.
I'll watch the meter for you.
811
01:11:17,853 --> 01:11:19,912
- Nice car.
- It's a rental.
812
01:11:20,455 --> 01:11:24,118
I figured Paris, excitement,
romance, you know.
813
01:11:24,192 --> 01:11:28,128
- I'm leaving Paris tonight, on the redeye.
- Bon voyage.
814
01:11:28,196 --> 01:11:29,925
Goodbye, Inspector.
815
01:11:37,038 --> 01:11:38,767
- You know Mrs. Dreyfus?
- Yes, sir.
816
01:11:38,840 --> 01:11:41,809
Well, let me know immediately
if she arrives.
817
01:11:49,751 --> 01:11:51,275
- Nicole.
- Yes.
818
01:11:51,353 --> 01:11:54,117
- I thought you might be hungry.
- Well...
819
01:11:55,157 --> 01:11:58,490
- That is very thoughtful of you.
- Cute car.
820
01:11:58,560 --> 01:12:00,653
It's Miss Solandres' car.
821
01:12:02,798 --> 01:12:06,359
- Well, it's a little chilly out here, so...
- Nicole?
822
01:12:10,539 --> 01:12:12,439
You are very pretty.
823
01:12:13,241 --> 01:12:17,405
Well, that's odd. Some would say
I was drab and disgusting.
824
01:12:17,479 --> 01:12:20,380
Well, who in their right mind
could call you drab and disgusting?
825
01:12:20,449 --> 01:12:23,441
Whoever could say something like that,
would...
826
01:12:25,487 --> 01:12:26,613
I said it.
827
01:12:26,688 --> 01:12:28,747
- He told you?
- Yes, he did.
828
01:12:30,725 --> 01:12:34,718
I only said it
because I didn't want him to...
829
01:12:34,796 --> 01:12:36,058
To what?
830
01:12:37,566 --> 01:12:39,557
To fall in love with you.
831
01:12:46,074 --> 01:12:48,201
I don't know what to think.
832
01:13:26,648 --> 01:13:30,175
- Ponton speaking.
- Ponton, here's what I want you to do.
833
01:13:33,588 --> 01:13:35,954
I'm thinking of recommending...
834
01:13:36,024 --> 01:13:39,824
...the establishment of a permanent
international police force...
835
01:13:39,895 --> 01:13:43,661
...which, of course,
I would be prepared to command.
836
01:13:54,376 --> 01:13:55,741
Excuse me.
837
01:14:02,250 --> 01:14:04,514
- What?
- I have solved the case.
838
01:14:05,554 --> 01:14:07,852
- What?
- I have solved the case.
839
01:14:07,923 --> 01:14:12,155
The case has been solved, Clouseau.
That is why we're having the party...
840
01:14:12,227 --> 01:14:14,957
...you see, because we've solved the case.
841
01:14:28,810 --> 01:14:30,175
Are you all right, Chief Inspector?
842
01:14:30,245 --> 01:14:34,375
- It's clueless Clouseau again.
- Is he here?
843
01:14:34,449 --> 01:14:38,886
He's so desperate to regain his status
as the Pink Panther hero...
844
01:14:38,954 --> 01:14:41,855
...that he's come up with
the most ingenious theory.
845
01:14:41,923 --> 01:14:45,984
- What theory?
- That you are the thief.
846
01:14:46,795 --> 01:14:47,853
Me?
847
01:14:50,632 --> 01:14:53,226
And that you have the Pink Panther
here with you.
848
01:14:53,301 --> 01:14:55,292
Now I'm feeling guilty.
849
01:14:55,370 --> 01:14:58,965
I've been feuding with a man
who is mentally handicapped.
850
01:14:59,274 --> 01:15:02,141
For one thing, how could Sonia
have performed the theft in Rome?
851
01:15:02,210 --> 01:15:04,337
We were all there together.
852
01:15:04,879 --> 01:15:08,474
Actually,
the rest of us were all at the bar.
853
01:15:08,550 --> 01:15:12,680
If you recall, Miss Solandres
stayed home with a headache.
854
01:15:12,754 --> 01:15:13,778
Well, that's right, but...
855
01:15:13,855 --> 01:15:16,847
But where would you get the expertise
for these crimes?
856
01:15:16,925 --> 01:15:20,588
Well, she is the world's
foremost authority on II Tornado.
857
01:15:23,064 --> 01:15:28,024
Just as a parlor game, what if
she obtained this expertise directly from...
858
01:15:28,103 --> 01:15:30,128
What if she were his daughter?
859
01:15:30,205 --> 01:15:31,866
- No, that wouldn't...
- A lover.
860
01:15:31,940 --> 01:15:35,307
- Yes, a scorned lover.
- Better. Motive.
861
01:15:35,377 --> 01:15:38,869
That would explain stealing
the unfenceable items...
862
01:15:38,947 --> 01:15:41,677
- To direct attention...
- To II Tornado.
863
01:15:41,750 --> 01:15:46,016
So she can bring him out of hiding
and set him up as the perpetrator.
864
01:15:46,888 --> 01:15:51,052
- Then she could kill him, forge a note...
- And keep the Pink Panther.
865
01:15:51,126 --> 01:15:53,617
As Clouseau said, the one fenceable item.
866
01:15:53,695 --> 01:15:57,153
Congratulations, gentlemen,
a very diverting and amusing puzzle...
867
01:15:57,232 --> 01:15:59,757
...solved in two minutes.
868
01:16:02,671 --> 01:16:03,831
Bravo.
869
01:16:06,608 --> 01:16:08,235
Open your purse.
870
01:16:09,744 --> 01:16:13,475
Nicoletta, you misunderstand.
This is a game, an exercise.
871
01:16:13,548 --> 01:16:17,006
Yes, but just to complete the game,
let's have a look.
872
01:16:19,688 --> 01:16:21,679
I have a plane to catch.
873
01:16:24,726 --> 01:16:27,058
Seriously, gentlemen!
874
01:16:30,932 --> 01:16:34,368
Okay, let's get this over and done with.
875
01:16:38,473 --> 01:16:39,997
Oh, my God! He was right.
876
01:16:43,812 --> 01:16:47,908
Stop! I am the one you want, not her.
877
01:16:48,583 --> 01:16:54,112
Only I possess the evidence that will keep
you in prison for the rest of your life.
878
01:16:54,189 --> 01:16:57,158
So if you're going to shoot anyone,
shoot me.
879
01:16:58,359 --> 01:16:59,519
Okay.
880
01:17:01,262 --> 01:17:03,924
Perhaps I did not think that through.
881
01:17:08,403 --> 01:17:09,665
Jacques!
882
01:17:11,005 --> 01:17:12,768
I wish I'd shot him.
883
01:17:14,976 --> 01:17:17,706
Look, his Medal of Honor
absorbed the bullet.
884
01:17:17,779 --> 01:17:18,905
- What?
- Not exactly.
885
01:17:18,980 --> 01:17:21,915
The bullet ricocheted and killed the waiter.
886
01:17:22,584 --> 01:17:24,984
Where's Sonia?
887
01:17:25,053 --> 01:17:27,851
She mustn't escape. I'll stop her.
888
01:18:05,026 --> 01:18:06,288
Get back.
889
01:18:08,429 --> 01:18:13,298
That gun is pointless. There are four of us,
and you only have four bullets left.
890
01:18:15,370 --> 01:18:17,133
That doesn't add up.
891
01:18:28,216 --> 01:18:31,185
All right, I'm warning you, Miss Solandres,
I've got a...
892
01:18:31,252 --> 01:18:32,446
Spoon?
893
01:18:32,921 --> 01:18:34,548
I've got a knife.
894
01:19:12,861 --> 01:19:14,852
Stop. You cannot escape.
895
01:19:21,302 --> 01:19:25,295
- You don't have a match.
- That's right.
896
01:19:27,842 --> 01:19:30,402
Never use an elevator during a fire.
897
01:19:32,547 --> 01:19:34,447
Fire? Leave this to me.
898
01:20:06,514 --> 01:20:09,642
In the name of the statutes and laws
of the great nation of France...
899
01:20:09,717 --> 01:20:13,915
...you are under arrest for the theft
of the world's most priceless...
900
01:20:21,529 --> 01:20:23,360
You are under arrest!
901
01:20:31,472 --> 01:20:34,032
Let me go, or I will destroy it.
902
01:20:34,108 --> 01:20:36,440
- Let her go.
- Let her do it.
903
01:20:36,511 --> 01:20:38,638
Are you insane?
904
01:20:58,232 --> 01:20:59,961
Good work, Ponton.
905
01:21:00,435 --> 01:21:07,136
You moron! You twerp!
You sad excuse for a human being!
906
01:21:07,208 --> 01:21:11,577
You have just destroyed
the sacred symbol of France!
907
01:21:12,647 --> 01:21:16,811
- Ponton, did you bring what I asked for?
- Boys.
908
01:21:20,188 --> 01:21:23,419
- Here it is, Uncle Jacques.
- Yes, yes.
909
01:21:24,792 --> 01:21:28,785
I knew the Tornado would eventually
come after the Pink Panther.
910
01:21:29,330 --> 01:21:33,357
So I went to the musйe
with a simple plan in mind.
911
01:21:33,434 --> 01:21:36,892
I had convinced my old friend,
Robert the night guard...
912
01:21:36,971 --> 01:21:41,169
...to turn off the security system
for the few moments necessary...
913
01:21:41,242 --> 01:21:44,575
...to save the most beautiful object
in France.
914
01:21:44,645 --> 01:21:49,139
I then switched the Pink Panther
with the replica I had at home.
915
01:21:49,851 --> 01:21:52,115
This is the real Pink Panther.
916
01:21:54,489 --> 01:21:56,821
It was the fake that was stolen.
917
01:21:58,126 --> 01:22:00,788
Nightmare. Nightmare.
918
01:22:02,063 --> 01:22:05,499
And when the Tornado,
an expert on the quality of gems...
919
01:22:05,566 --> 01:22:09,332
...wrote in his supposed suicide note
of its great beauty...
920
01:22:09,404 --> 01:22:14,341
I knew he could never have been the thief.
He would have recognized it as a fake.
921
01:22:15,476 --> 01:22:18,172
How did you figure out it was Sonia?
922
01:22:18,246 --> 01:22:21,943
It was because I spent the last 17 months
on parking duty.
923
01:22:22,850 --> 01:22:24,078
What?
924
01:22:26,487 --> 01:22:30,355
Today, I was staring
at Miss Solandres' license plate.
925
01:22:30,425 --> 01:22:35,294
I recognized it because of
my unique system of cross-referencing.
926
01:22:36,464 --> 01:22:40,525
I became aware that I had
given a ticket to the same car...
927
01:22:40,601 --> 01:22:44,765
...two days before Miss Solandres
claimed she arrived in Paris.
928
01:22:46,307 --> 01:22:49,640
One day before
the Pink Panther was stolen.
929
01:22:55,616 --> 01:22:57,880
You followed my instructions
very well, Clouseau.
930
01:22:57,952 --> 01:23:01,888
It was I, of course, who put Clouseau
onto the parking ticket assignment.
931
01:23:01,956 --> 01:23:04,424
- Isn't that so, Inspector?
- No.
932
01:23:07,295 --> 01:23:09,024
And at Avellaneda's mansion...
933
01:23:09,097 --> 01:23:11,691
...when I sensed the presence
of the Tornado...
934
01:23:11,766 --> 01:23:13,757
...he was there, all right.
935
01:23:14,435 --> 01:23:17,700
But it was not a he, it was a she!
936
01:23:25,446 --> 01:23:28,244
Clouseau is the greatest detective
in the world.
937
01:23:28,316 --> 01:23:30,841
His mind is sharper
than all of us combined.
938
01:23:30,918 --> 01:23:33,478
- Should we tell him?
- Absolutely not.
939
01:23:45,933 --> 01:23:47,662
Inspector Clouseau.
940
01:23:48,436 --> 01:23:52,031
Sometimes a man must be bold enough
to speak from the heart.
941
01:23:52,106 --> 01:23:54,700
You deserve to know the truth
about Nicole and I.
942
01:23:54,775 --> 01:23:58,802
- Stop. I don't want to hear.
- But nothing happened.
943
01:23:59,614 --> 01:24:01,605
- Nothing?
- Nothing.
944
01:24:02,250 --> 01:24:06,846
- It pains me to admit, but no.
- Not even a little smoochie-woochie?
945
01:24:08,322 --> 01:24:12,122
I never had a chance,
because she only has eyes for one man.
946
01:24:12,693 --> 01:24:13,751
You.
947
01:24:14,595 --> 01:24:18,122
Yes, you. Now please, for God's sake,
kiss her already.
948
01:24:23,504 --> 01:24:28,066
Nicole, I have learned that...
949
01:24:28,142 --> 01:24:29,973
...no man is an island.
950
01:24:30,745 --> 01:24:37,014
So would you, even though
it may lead to possible injury...
951
01:24:38,319 --> 01:24:39,581
...marry me?
952
01:25:03,311 --> 01:25:07,441
Inspector Dreyfus, thank you again
for agreeing to conduct the ceremony.
953
01:25:07,515 --> 01:25:10,575
It makes everything
that much more special.
954
01:25:16,090 --> 01:25:20,493
Jacques Clouseau and Nicole Durant.
955
01:25:20,561 --> 01:25:23,792
Do you promise to love, honor and obey...
956
01:25:23,864 --> 01:25:27,356
Wait! A wife does not
have to obey her husband.
957
01:25:30,972 --> 01:25:35,671
Okay, scrap "obey". Do you promise
to love and honor each other?
958
01:25:35,743 --> 01:25:37,233
- I do.
- I do.
959
01:25:37,311 --> 01:25:39,575
Good! So by the powers vested in me...
960
01:25:39,647 --> 01:25:42,514
...as Chief Inspector
of the 13th Arrondissement...
961
01:25:42,583 --> 01:25:46,246
I now declare you husband and wife.
962
01:26:06,040 --> 01:26:08,736
Here's to peace and harmony.
963
01:26:15,950 --> 01:26:17,918
- The password?
- Hamburger!
964
01:26:17,985 --> 01:26:19,509
That's not it.
965
01:26:20,054 --> 01:26:22,756
- Hamburger!
- No!
966
01:26:22,823 --> 01:26:26,623
They must have changed it.
Clouseau, your gadget!
967
01:26:26,694 --> 01:26:29,128
Clouseau, what's the new password?
968
01:26:30,197 --> 01:26:31,994
It says "low battery".
969
01:26:32,066 --> 01:26:33,761
- Low battery.
- No!
970
01:26:33,834 --> 01:26:36,325
No, wait. That means the battery is low.
971
01:26:36,404 --> 01:26:38,804
It wants me to go online
and renew my subscription.
972
01:26:38,873 --> 01:26:43,207
- For God's sake, Clouseau!
- Kenji, please take care of this.
973
01:26:44,245 --> 01:26:46,304
We have a plane to catch.
974
01:26:48,916 --> 01:26:51,146
- Was it beautiful?
- Very beautiful.
975
01:26:51,218 --> 01:26:53,584
- Here are your glasses.
- Thanks.
976
01:26:55,823 --> 01:26:56,915
Wait.
977
01:27:02,897 --> 01:27:05,627
- Was my mother there?
- Yes, absolutely!
978
01:27:05,700 --> 01:27:08,533
- Can't you hear her screaming?
- Not really.