1 00:00:31,480 --> 00:00:33,849 Hello. I am Greg Davies and this is Taskmaster, 2 00:00:33,850 --> 00:00:35,239 and I am the Taskmaster. 3 00:00:35,240 --> 00:00:37,829 A while ago, I decided to ask some well-known comedians 4 00:00:37,830 --> 00:00:39,679 to do some extraordinary things for me. 5 00:00:39,680 --> 00:00:41,119 Because I am who I am, 6 00:00:41,120 --> 00:00:43,679 they all agreed to take part instantly, 7 00:00:43,680 --> 00:00:45,599 and that's why we're all here now. 8 00:00:45,600 --> 00:00:49,279 They have no idea how each other did, but they will soon find out. 9 00:00:49,280 --> 00:00:51,839 I shall be judging both what they did and how they did it. 10 00:00:51,840 --> 00:00:55,460 My word is final, but at times they will probably get really angry. 11 00:00:56,560 --> 00:00:57,959 Let's meet them now. 12 00:00:57,960 --> 00:01:00,399 He is a national treasure, by which I mean 13 00:01:00,400 --> 00:01:03,319 he's older than the others. It's Frank Skinner! 14 00:01:03,320 --> 00:01:07,020 [applause] 15 00:01:08,520 --> 00:01:11,199 He sounds a lot like Zippy from Rainbow... 16 00:01:11,200 --> 00:01:12,839 It's Josh Widdicombe. 17 00:01:12,840 --> 00:01:16,279 [applause] 18 00:01:16,280 --> 00:01:20,279 I genuinely once returned to my flat to find her in my bed, 19 00:01:20,280 --> 00:01:23,799 eating biscuits and watching a documentary on Colditz. 20 00:01:23,800 --> 00:01:26,039 [laughter] 21 00:01:26,040 --> 00:01:27,919 It's Roisin Conaty. 22 00:01:27,920 --> 00:01:30,559 [applause] 23 00:01:30,560 --> 00:01:34,959 He is the least experienced but the most constantly angry of the contestants. 24 00:01:34,960 --> 00:01:37,519 It's Romesh Ranganathan. 25 00:01:37,520 --> 00:01:39,679 [applause] 26 00:01:39,680 --> 00:01:41,879 Sort of a poet, sort of a comedian, 27 00:01:41,880 --> 00:01:44,359 sort of a hairstyle. Tim Key! 28 00:01:44,360 --> 00:01:48,339 [applause] 29 00:01:48,340 --> 00:01:51,159 As always, I am both aided and praised 30 00:01:51,160 --> 00:01:52,999 by my personal assistant, Alex Horne. 31 00:01:53,000 --> 00:01:55,879 - So, Alex. You alright? - Hello. Yes, yes. 32 00:01:55,880 --> 00:01:57,479 Do you want to have some banter with the host? 33 00:01:57,480 --> 00:01:58,999 Yes, erm... 34 00:01:59,000 --> 00:02:00,519 You look ni-- It says you look very-- 35 00:02:00,520 --> 00:02:02,540 You look a little bit like a security man. 36 00:02:03,760 --> 00:02:06,319 - On with the show. - [laughter] 37 00:02:06,320 --> 00:02:07,799 Tell us about the first task. 38 00:02:07,800 --> 00:02:10,959 OK. So, the first task, as always, is the prize task. 39 00:02:10,960 --> 00:02:13,429 Each of the contestants tonight has brought in 40 00:02:13,430 --> 00:02:16,079 one of their possessions for the prize haul. 41 00:02:16,080 --> 00:02:18,039 And whichever one you judge to be the best 42 00:02:18,040 --> 00:02:20,379 of those prizes will get the first points. 43 00:02:20,380 --> 00:02:23,239 It's supposed to genuinely mean something to them. 44 00:02:23,240 --> 00:02:25,279 - It's supposed to be important. - It's bloody important, yep. 45 00:02:25,280 --> 00:02:28,399 And this time you've asked them to bring in their most valuable item. 46 00:02:28,400 --> 00:02:30,679 [Greg] Frank, tell us what you've brought in. 47 00:02:30,680 --> 00:02:34,119 I've brought a ring that I purchased in... 48 00:02:34,120 --> 00:02:36,399 - [Frank] It's a beauty. - [audience] Woooo! 49 00:02:36,400 --> 00:02:39,559 Lovely, it's gone very The Price Is Right. 50 00:02:39,560 --> 00:02:41,239 [laughter] 51 00:02:41,240 --> 00:02:45,219 I bought it in 2001, 52 00:02:45,220 --> 00:02:49,759 and I think I paid 600 quid for it. 53 00:02:49,760 --> 00:02:51,639 £600 is a hell of a start though, isn't it? 54 00:02:51,640 --> 00:02:53,799 - Is it still worth £600? - Well, we had it valued... 55 00:02:53,800 --> 00:02:54,790 It's now... 56 00:02:54,791 --> 00:02:57,959 Well, it's currently worth £3,995. 57 00:02:57,960 --> 00:02:59,780 - [they gasp] - [Josh] No way! 58 00:03:01,320 --> 00:03:03,279 Whoa, whoa! 59 00:03:03,280 --> 00:03:07,439 [laughter and applause] 60 00:03:07,440 --> 00:03:08,540 Yeah, yeah. 61 00:03:10,800 --> 00:03:13,999 The whole game's not quite so funny now, is it? 62 00:03:14,000 --> 00:03:15,879 [laughter] 63 00:03:15,880 --> 00:03:19,199 - [Alex] It's worth £3,995. - Basically £4,000. 64 00:03:19,200 --> 00:03:21,679 Nearly four grand. It's a hell of an opener. 65 00:03:21,680 --> 00:03:23,999 That's... I mean, to these people, that's a lot of money. 66 00:03:24,000 --> 00:03:24,800 [Greg] Oh, God! 67 00:03:24,801 --> 00:03:26,999 [laughter] 68 00:03:27,000 --> 00:03:29,119 Josh, four grand is a lot to beat... 69 00:03:29,120 --> 00:03:31,479 Yeah, four grand is nothing compared to mine, 70 00:03:31,480 --> 00:03:34,519 because I have taken the ultimate gamble, 71 00:03:34,520 --> 00:03:37,659 and I have signed a blank cheque. 72 00:03:37,660 --> 00:03:39,919 [audience gasps] 73 00:03:39,920 --> 00:03:43,119 It could be whatever the morals of the winner dictate. 74 00:03:43,120 --> 00:03:45,079 Well, that's you well and truly fucked then, isn't it? 75 00:03:45,080 --> 00:03:46,759 [laughter] 76 00:03:46,760 --> 00:03:49,439 I think this is also gonna be one of those things that you think, 77 00:03:49,440 --> 00:03:52,359 "funny idea" before the show, but it's gonna backfire. I mean... 78 00:03:52,360 --> 00:03:55,399 No, I don't think Frank Skinner is gonna... 79 00:03:55,400 --> 00:03:57,539 No, Frank doesn't need it, but if I come to the other end... 80 00:03:57,540 --> 00:03:58,280 Hold it! 81 00:03:58,281 --> 00:03:59,919 [laughter] 82 00:03:59,920 --> 00:04:03,039 I don't need it, but I like the idea of Josh no longer having it. 83 00:04:03,040 --> 00:04:05,079 [laughter] 84 00:04:05,080 --> 00:04:06,359 What's the maximum you can do? 85 00:04:06,360 --> 00:04:07,320 - Twenty grand. - Twenty grand. 86 00:04:07,321 --> 00:04:08,719 - [Josh] What?! - I would do 20 grand. 87 00:04:08,720 --> 00:04:09,820 NO! 88 00:04:10,880 --> 00:04:12,799 You-- Hey, hey, hey-- 89 00:04:12,800 --> 00:04:14,729 [imitating Josh] "Oh, I'm doing the most valuable!" 90 00:04:14,730 --> 00:04:15,680 "I'm putting up a cheque! 91 00:04:15,681 --> 00:04:16,799 Well, deal with it, bitch. 92 00:04:16,800 --> 00:04:18,279 [laughter] 93 00:04:18,280 --> 00:04:20,129 Roisin, we've already got a winner in this round. 94 00:04:20,130 --> 00:04:21,080 What have you brought in? 95 00:04:21,081 --> 00:04:23,199 [laughter] 96 00:04:23,200 --> 00:04:25,319 I've brought in a diamond ring. 97 00:04:25,320 --> 00:04:26,919 [audience] Oooo. 98 00:04:26,920 --> 00:04:31,199 Right, now. I don't want to sully the atmosphere of this room 99 00:04:31,200 --> 00:04:33,439 because you and I are friends, 100 00:04:33,440 --> 00:04:35,439 but I know that's not a diamond ring. 101 00:04:35,440 --> 00:04:36,719 [laughter] 102 00:04:36,720 --> 00:04:37,799 How much is it worth, Roisin? 103 00:04:37,800 --> 00:04:38,980 Twelve pounds. 104 00:04:39,760 --> 00:04:42,359 So, Roisin goes instantly into last place. 105 00:04:42,360 --> 00:04:44,479 So, that's fine. Romesh? 106 00:04:44,480 --> 00:04:47,199 I have put up what is easily the most valuable. 107 00:04:47,200 --> 00:04:49,479 It's a Peugeot 407. 108 00:04:49,480 --> 00:04:50,440 Wow! 109 00:04:50,441 --> 00:04:53,340 - No way! - [they gasp] 110 00:04:54,160 --> 00:04:55,120 [Greg] Is it yours? 111 00:04:55,121 --> 00:04:56,279 My wife gave it to me. 112 00:04:56,280 --> 00:04:59,279 She doesn't know that I'm doing this. 113 00:04:59,280 --> 00:05:00,879 How much is Romesh's car worth? 114 00:05:00,880 --> 00:05:02,359 The car is worth, currently... 115 00:05:02,360 --> 00:05:05,739 It's worth £590, because it's not a good car. 116 00:05:05,740 --> 00:05:07,959 It's not a good car and it's 14 years old. 117 00:05:07,960 --> 00:05:09,039 [laughter] 118 00:05:09,040 --> 00:05:11,039 Roisin comfortably still in last place. 119 00:05:11,040 --> 00:05:12,359 Tim, what did you bring in? 120 00:05:12,360 --> 00:05:15,900 I brought, um, eight copies of my book. 121 00:05:16,880 --> 00:05:21,239 [laughter and applause] 122 00:05:21,240 --> 00:05:23,239 How much does your book retail at? 123 00:05:23,240 --> 00:05:26,999 Well, I mean... When it first went on sale we were all fairly positive. 124 00:05:27,000 --> 00:05:30,399 [laughter] 125 00:05:30,400 --> 00:05:32,559 £8.99, I think. Do you know? 126 00:05:32,560 --> 00:05:34,279 Yeah, they're currently on for £3.50 on Amazon. 127 00:05:34,280 --> 00:05:37,679 You can get them for £3.50. But these are signed, are they? 128 00:05:37,680 --> 00:05:38,980 I can sign 'em, yeah. 129 00:05:40,360 --> 00:05:41,799 I signed my cheque! 130 00:05:41,800 --> 00:05:44,319 [laughter] 131 00:05:44,320 --> 00:05:47,919 Have we got any indication of how much Tim's signature would add to the... 132 00:05:47,920 --> 00:05:50,919 I would say, in total, they're gonna be between the £12 and the car. 133 00:05:50,920 --> 00:05:52,359 [laughter] 134 00:05:52,360 --> 00:05:56,079 Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of that first round is Mr Josh Widdicombe. 135 00:05:56,080 --> 00:06:00,959 [cheers and applause] 136 00:06:00,960 --> 00:06:03,879 Which means that the leaderboard looks like this. 137 00:06:03,880 --> 00:06:06,439 [applause] 138 00:06:06,440 --> 00:06:09,839 Ladies and gentlemen, all of these prizes will be taken home by the winner tonight. 139 00:06:09,840 --> 00:06:11,759 Something they may come to regret. 140 00:06:11,760 --> 00:06:13,479 They're on display up there. 141 00:06:13,480 --> 00:06:16,079 Ladies and gentlemen, those are our prizes up on the balcony. 142 00:06:16,080 --> 00:06:17,359 [audience] Oooo! 143 00:06:17,360 --> 00:06:20,119 Time for the first big task, ladies and gentlemen. 144 00:06:20,120 --> 00:06:21,420 Task one, proper. 145 00:06:34,400 --> 00:06:40,999 [eerie sci-fi music] 146 00:06:41,000 --> 00:06:42,359 Ooh, my... 147 00:06:42,360 --> 00:06:43,460 Wow! 148 00:06:45,120 --> 00:06:46,439 What the... 149 00:06:46,440 --> 00:06:48,180 Exciting, isn't it? 150 00:06:50,200 --> 00:06:51,759 [she laughs] 151 00:06:51,760 --> 00:06:52,980 [he chuckles] 152 00:06:54,880 --> 00:06:57,479 Oh, mate, I used to dream about stuff like this happening as a kid. 153 00:06:57,480 --> 00:06:59,399 Aliens... sending me mail. 154 00:06:59,400 --> 00:07:03,679 "Get this boulder as far from this place as possible." 155 00:07:03,680 --> 00:07:05,759 "You have one hour. Your time starts now." 156 00:07:05,760 --> 00:07:07,140 Oh, my God. 157 00:07:07,920 --> 00:07:09,679 [applause] 158 00:07:09,680 --> 00:07:12,799 Yes, at the Taskmaster mansion, I had a massive boulder I wanted moving. 159 00:07:12,800 --> 00:07:15,239 Why wouldn't I have a massive boulder I wanted moving? 160 00:07:15,240 --> 00:07:17,759 Let's see how Roisin Conaty handled that challenge. 161 00:07:17,760 --> 00:07:19,079 [Josh laughs] 162 00:07:19,080 --> 00:07:22,679 Hello, I was wondering if I could order a courier, please? 163 00:07:22,680 --> 00:07:25,599 I need the one after a transit van, I reckon. 164 00:07:25,600 --> 00:07:26,679 Or a transit van? 165 00:07:26,680 --> 00:07:28,559 Do you reckon I'd get that in a transit...? 166 00:07:28,560 --> 00:07:30,359 Camber Sands. 167 00:07:30,360 --> 00:07:32,159 Um, bear with me one moment. 168 00:07:32,160 --> 00:07:34,199 Will you map it and just see how long it is? 169 00:07:34,200 --> 00:07:35,559 [Alex] There we go. Two hours. 170 00:07:35,560 --> 00:07:37,159 No, I can't, sorry-- 171 00:07:37,160 --> 00:07:40,599 Can I not have it Camber Sands, actually, sorry. 172 00:07:40,600 --> 00:07:43,439 That's two hours away and I need it to go somewhere that's an hour away. 173 00:07:43,440 --> 00:07:46,639 Um, can I call you back in five minutes? 174 00:07:46,640 --> 00:07:48,839 - You've got, um... - Loads of time? 175 00:07:48,840 --> 00:07:50,079 Forty-eight minutes left. 176 00:07:50,080 --> 00:07:51,319 OK, let's go inside. 177 00:07:51,320 --> 00:07:52,359 [laughter] 178 00:07:52,360 --> 00:07:54,799 The thing is, though, even if I order a courier, 179 00:07:54,800 --> 00:07:56,319 they're not gonna get here in an hour. 180 00:07:56,320 --> 00:07:59,119 Well, not if you don't call them. 181 00:07:59,120 --> 00:08:03,399 Hello, I called a moment ago about ordering a collection. 182 00:08:03,400 --> 00:08:06,839 It's one sort of large... item. 183 00:08:06,840 --> 00:08:09,159 - It's a boulder. - [laughter] 184 00:08:09,160 --> 00:08:11,279 I'll call you back in two minutes, then, just to confirm. 185 00:08:11,280 --> 00:08:13,439 Is that alright? Sorry about that. I just needed to check... 186 00:08:13,440 --> 00:08:15,439 Just to make sure that we've got the quickest time. 187 00:08:15,440 --> 00:08:17,739 Thank you so much. Bye-bye. 188 00:08:17,740 --> 00:08:19,239 How long will they be? 189 00:08:19,240 --> 00:08:21,359 45 to 60 minutes. 190 00:08:21,360 --> 00:08:23,679 Oh, right. You've got 32 minutes left. 191 00:08:23,680 --> 00:08:28,479 [laughter] 192 00:08:28,480 --> 00:08:30,639 I've just got two quick questions for you. 193 00:08:30,640 --> 00:08:32,559 Where is the boulder at this stage in the challenge? 194 00:08:32,560 --> 00:08:34,919 - Still in the garage. - It's still in the garage. 195 00:08:34,920 --> 00:08:36,799 Twenty-eight minutes have passed, it's still in the garage. 196 00:08:36,800 --> 00:08:38,319 And my second question is... 197 00:08:38,320 --> 00:08:41,359 Why was your first instinct to take it to Camber Sands? 198 00:08:41,360 --> 00:08:44,919 [laughter] 199 00:08:44,920 --> 00:08:47,199 I'd been Googling Camber Sands the day before. 200 00:08:47,200 --> 00:08:49,079 What? Why had you been Googling it? 201 00:08:49,080 --> 00:08:50,380 'Cause I wanted a day trip. 202 00:08:51,760 --> 00:08:55,119 Were you taking the rock back to its natural habitat? 203 00:08:55,120 --> 00:08:56,879 [laughter] 204 00:08:56,880 --> 00:09:01,060 Let's see what the master's got in store for us in the second part of the challenge. 205 00:09:03,640 --> 00:09:06,359 Oh! Oh dear... 206 00:09:06,360 --> 00:09:08,460 I've messed this up so bad. 207 00:09:10,400 --> 00:09:15,119 [laughter and applause] 208 00:09:15,120 --> 00:09:17,519 So, after 28 minutes of debate, 209 00:09:17,520 --> 00:09:20,959 and establishing that she would ideally like to get it to Camber Sands, 210 00:09:20,960 --> 00:09:23,729 Roisin then decided to roll the boulder. 211 00:09:23,730 --> 00:09:25,119 That was the plan B. 212 00:09:25,120 --> 00:09:27,859 Alex, how far did Roisin get the boulder? 213 00:09:27,860 --> 00:09:30,919 In an hour, she moved the boulder 300 yards. 214 00:09:30,920 --> 00:09:33,039 [laughter] 215 00:09:33,040 --> 00:09:35,519 It's 200,000 yards away, so just shy... 216 00:09:35,520 --> 00:09:37,439 - Just shy of Camber Sands. - Just shy of the target. 217 00:09:37,440 --> 00:09:39,159 I mean, I knew I'd made a mistake. 218 00:09:39,160 --> 00:09:41,279 I tried to act on impulse, without thinking. 219 00:09:41,280 --> 00:09:43,359 I thought, "Just get a courier and get it out!" 220 00:09:43,360 --> 00:09:47,399 You tried to act on impulse and it was still in the garage after 28 minutes? 221 00:09:47,400 --> 00:09:48,320 [Greg] Amazing. 222 00:09:48,321 --> 00:09:51,479 I'm not a betting man, but I think we've found our last place for this round. 223 00:09:51,480 --> 00:09:52,839 [laughter] 224 00:09:52,840 --> 00:09:54,959 OK, everyone, stop. We're having a break. 225 00:09:54,960 --> 00:09:57,060 See you in a minute for the conclusion. 226 00:10:03,680 --> 00:10:05,639 Welcome back to Taskmaster. We missed you. 227 00:10:05,640 --> 00:10:07,839 But enough of that. On with the show. 228 00:10:07,840 --> 00:10:09,639 Alex, who was next? 229 00:10:09,640 --> 00:10:12,199 We're gonna have a look at Romesh and Frank together 230 00:10:12,200 --> 00:10:13,759 'cause they had slightly more lateral thinking. 231 00:10:13,760 --> 00:10:15,599 [Frank] Is there a wheelbarrow in the shed? 232 00:10:15,600 --> 00:10:17,020 Yeah! 233 00:10:19,840 --> 00:10:21,740 [boulder scraping] 234 00:10:22,920 --> 00:10:25,460 [boulder squeaking] 235 00:10:38,080 --> 00:10:40,639 [Romesh] Can I get someone to take this for me? 236 00:10:40,640 --> 00:10:42,799 I'm thinking about phoning up someone. 237 00:10:42,800 --> 00:10:46,799 Could you search "van" plus "driver hire"? 238 00:10:46,800 --> 00:10:50,059 - I've got van Persie. - Van Persie? No. 239 00:10:50,060 --> 00:10:52,799 [Alex] The man with a van removal service in Chiswick. 240 00:10:52,800 --> 00:10:55,340 OK, so it says, "Contact Mo." 241 00:10:56,680 --> 00:10:58,039 [phone beeps] 242 00:10:58,040 --> 00:11:02,959 Good morning. Um, I'm trying to get a... 243 00:11:02,960 --> 00:11:06,119 a facsimile boulder onto a train. 244 00:11:06,120 --> 00:11:08,900 [laughter] 245 00:11:11,040 --> 00:11:12,799 [Frank] It's a... It's a boulder. 246 00:11:12,800 --> 00:11:14,540 [train roars] 247 00:11:18,200 --> 00:11:19,599 [Alex] Here he is. 248 00:11:19,600 --> 00:11:20,639 - Are you Mo? - Yes. 249 00:11:20,640 --> 00:11:23,239 Hello, Mo. Listen, I need a massive favour. 250 00:11:23,240 --> 00:11:26,159 I need to get that boulder as far away from here as possible. 251 00:11:26,160 --> 00:11:28,479 So if I put it in the back of your van... 252 00:11:28,480 --> 00:11:30,519 We came from that direction, so I just want you to head... 253 00:11:30,520 --> 00:11:34,060 You've got ten minutes to get it as far away in that direction as possible. 254 00:11:36,720 --> 00:11:38,060 Godspeed, Mo! 255 00:11:39,040 --> 00:11:43,879 [applause] 256 00:11:43,880 --> 00:11:46,959 And it's already progress in that they were moving whilst thinking. 257 00:11:46,960 --> 00:11:49,159 He got just the luck of the draw that he got a courier. 258 00:11:49,160 --> 00:11:52,079 I phoned a lot of couriers, Alex, you know I tried a lot. 259 00:11:52,080 --> 00:11:53,159 Well, you phoned one courier, 260 00:11:53,160 --> 00:11:54,960 and then you phoned them back, and then you... 261 00:11:55,680 --> 00:11:57,359 Oh, no, and then you phoned them back. 262 00:11:57,360 --> 00:11:58,919 How many couriers did you try? 263 00:11:58,920 --> 00:12:00,119 Two or three, I think? 264 00:12:00,120 --> 00:12:01,759 On the third one, Mo came good? 265 00:12:01,760 --> 00:12:03,479 Yeah, but I'm gonna be honest with you. 266 00:12:03,480 --> 00:12:06,279 Mo was a nice guy, but he was a liar. 267 00:12:06,280 --> 00:12:07,120 Like, he... 268 00:12:07,121 --> 00:12:09,679 [laughter] 269 00:12:09,680 --> 00:12:11,959 He told me he was gonna be five minutes. 270 00:12:11,960 --> 00:12:14,159 Five minutes later, I call him, he says ten minutes. 271 00:12:14,160 --> 00:12:15,699 I say, "Mo, you get your story straight, 272 00:12:15,700 --> 00:12:17,439 then tell me when you're gonna be here, man." 273 00:12:17,440 --> 00:12:18,679 And how many minutes was it? 274 00:12:18,680 --> 00:12:20,599 Well, he wheelbarrowed it for 50 minutes, 275 00:12:20,600 --> 00:12:21,679 and then put it in a van for ten, 276 00:12:21,680 --> 00:12:23,679 and the other way around would've been a lot quicker. 277 00:12:23,680 --> 00:12:26,599 - Well... Yes, I know that! - [laughter] 278 00:12:26,600 --> 00:12:28,439 Did you have to look at the iPad for that fact? 279 00:12:28,440 --> 00:12:30,039 [laughter] 280 00:12:30,040 --> 00:12:32,239 No, listen, listen... 281 00:12:32,240 --> 00:12:34,269 You got a courier in 50 minutes. 282 00:12:34,270 --> 00:12:36,439 He showed up to pick up a boulder... 283 00:12:36,440 --> 00:12:38,239 - It's an incredible turnaround. - Do you know what he said to me? 284 00:12:38,240 --> 00:12:39,519 When he turned up, he said, "You'll never guess..." 285 00:12:39,520 --> 00:12:41,919 "Some crazy shithead wanted me to go to Camber Sands." 286 00:12:41,920 --> 00:12:44,999 [laughter] 287 00:12:45,000 --> 00:12:48,799 [applause] 288 00:12:48,800 --> 00:12:50,999 Shall we see how Mo actually did? 289 00:12:51,000 --> 00:12:54,359 Perhaps you're being unfair to Mo. Perhaps he's nailed this for you. 290 00:12:54,360 --> 00:12:57,099 I've put it on a map, exactly how far your boulder went, Romesh. 291 00:12:57,100 --> 00:13:01,479 You wheelbarrowed it for a mile in 50 minutes, which is quite impressive. 292 00:13:01,480 --> 00:13:02,719 - [Josh] Good work. - [Greg] That's impressive. 293 00:13:02,720 --> 00:13:06,119 - [Romesh] While on the phone to Mo. - [Alex] Who then drove it for 2.4 miles. 294 00:13:06,120 --> 00:13:08,079 [Alex] Unfortunately, the direction... 295 00:13:08,080 --> 00:13:12,540 [laughter] 296 00:13:14,000 --> 00:13:15,639 It's not great. 297 00:13:15,640 --> 00:13:17,559 Do you understand why I can't deal with Mo? 298 00:13:17,560 --> 00:13:18,639 He's a f... 299 00:13:18,640 --> 00:13:20,519 Mo is a prick! 300 00:13:20,520 --> 00:13:23,319 Before you give poor Mo any more grief than you've already given him, 301 00:13:23,320 --> 00:13:25,839 we all saw your instructions to Mo, 302 00:13:25,840 --> 00:13:28,039 and you said, "Drive in that direction." 303 00:13:28,040 --> 00:13:28,800 So it's my fault? 304 00:13:28,801 --> 00:13:30,359 - [Greg] Yeah. - You'd already turned left, yeah. 305 00:13:30,360 --> 00:13:32,639 Just to be absolutely crystal clear, 306 00:13:32,640 --> 00:13:34,239 all of this is your fault. 307 00:13:34,240 --> 00:13:35,679 [laughter] 308 00:13:35,680 --> 00:13:38,599 Just to say that Frank did actually get on the train 309 00:13:38,600 --> 00:13:39,879 - with the boulder, didn't you Frank? - [Frank] Mm-hm. 310 00:13:39,880 --> 00:13:41,079 [Alex] Yeah, that's commitment. 311 00:13:41,080 --> 00:13:43,700 A man said to me, "What's that?" 312 00:13:44,600 --> 00:13:47,199 And I said, "It's a boulder." 313 00:13:47,200 --> 00:13:48,879 And he said... 314 00:13:48,880 --> 00:13:50,479 "What's a boulder?" 315 00:13:50,480 --> 00:13:53,279 [laughter] 316 00:13:53,280 --> 00:13:56,639 And he said, "Is it like a... big rock?" 317 00:13:56,640 --> 00:13:59,199 [laughter] 318 00:13:59,200 --> 00:14:02,359 And I thought that was the definition I was grasping for, so I nodded. 319 00:14:02,360 --> 00:14:04,559 [laughter] 320 00:14:04,560 --> 00:14:06,159 How far did Frank get it? 321 00:14:06,160 --> 00:14:09,279 Frank got it 6.5 miles to Feltham, 322 00:14:09,280 --> 00:14:10,319 which is quite impressive. 323 00:14:10,320 --> 00:14:15,299 [cheers and applause] 324 00:14:15,300 --> 00:14:16,919 Frank's in the lead at this point. 325 00:14:16,920 --> 00:14:18,599 At this point, Frank is in the lead, yeah. 326 00:14:18,600 --> 00:14:20,679 Lovely. Shall we see how Josh and Tim got on? 327 00:14:20,680 --> 00:14:21,780 OK. 328 00:14:22,520 --> 00:14:24,879 Well, I was thinking helium balloons. 329 00:14:24,880 --> 00:14:26,859 - [Alex] That's a good idea. - And then it just goes. 330 00:14:26,860 --> 00:14:29,039 Get a lot of distance. 331 00:14:29,040 --> 00:14:31,439 How many helium balloons would we need? 332 00:14:31,440 --> 00:14:33,679 [laughter] 333 00:14:33,680 --> 00:14:35,279 We'd need a lot. 334 00:14:35,280 --> 00:14:37,799 And I just need to order a cab... 335 00:14:37,800 --> 00:14:39,759 As quickly as possible to arrive, 336 00:14:39,760 --> 00:14:44,479 and then I'll pay for them to drive for an hour west down the M4. 337 00:14:44,480 --> 00:14:47,100 [helium hissing] 338 00:14:57,200 --> 00:14:59,279 [Tim] Oh, I think this is a good idea. 339 00:14:59,280 --> 00:15:02,839 I think once it's up, it'll gather momentum pretty quickly. 340 00:15:02,840 --> 00:15:04,719 [he laughs] 341 00:15:04,720 --> 00:15:06,599 [Alex] Do you want me to get it? 342 00:15:06,600 --> 00:15:08,439 [Tim] It's a shame, that. 343 00:15:08,440 --> 00:15:09,919 Do you want to lift the other side and we'll just... 344 00:15:09,920 --> 00:15:10,959 - [Alex] Get it up? - Yeah. 345 00:15:10,960 --> 00:15:13,119 [Alex] Just at least get it started. 346 00:15:13,120 --> 00:15:14,319 - Ready? - Yep. 347 00:15:14,320 --> 00:15:16,580 One, two, three... 348 00:15:18,000 --> 00:15:19,500 [hollow clunking] 349 00:15:22,080 --> 00:15:24,039 [laughter] 350 00:15:24,040 --> 00:15:25,540 I'm gonna have a Crunch Cream. 351 00:15:29,240 --> 00:15:30,839 We need to put the rock on the van. 352 00:15:30,840 --> 00:15:32,479 Please can you help me put the rock on the van? 353 00:15:32,480 --> 00:15:33,160 OK. 354 00:15:33,161 --> 00:15:35,479 [boulder rustling] 355 00:15:35,480 --> 00:15:36,580 [Tim] OK. 356 00:15:41,920 --> 00:15:43,020 [Josh] Here he is. 357 00:15:48,440 --> 00:15:49,540 Thank you. 358 00:15:51,760 --> 00:15:53,539 Twenty-seven minutes. 359 00:15:53,540 --> 00:15:55,300 It's exciting, isn't it? 360 00:16:05,680 --> 00:16:07,599 [laughter] 361 00:16:07,600 --> 00:16:12,439 [applause] 362 00:16:12,440 --> 00:16:14,359 How long did you piss around with those balloons? 363 00:16:14,360 --> 00:16:17,279 Pissed around for about... half an hour, I think. 364 00:16:17,280 --> 00:16:18,319 No, maybe 40 minutes. 365 00:16:18,320 --> 00:16:21,319 Once Tim stopped all with the balloons, 366 00:16:21,320 --> 00:16:22,839 how far did he get it in your van? 367 00:16:22,840 --> 00:16:26,519 Once he put it on my van, it went 2.3 miles, 368 00:16:26,520 --> 00:16:28,839 which is just ahead of Romesh because of the problems with Mo. 369 00:16:28,840 --> 00:16:30,799 What I was most impressed with with you, Josh, 370 00:16:30,800 --> 00:16:33,199 was that you were totally unfazed, 371 00:16:33,200 --> 00:16:36,279 and never at any point did you consider moving the boulder yourself. 372 00:16:36,280 --> 00:16:37,639 No, w-what... 373 00:16:37,640 --> 00:16:38,480 It's not a criticism. 374 00:16:38,481 --> 00:16:41,039 I think you're like a general, letting other people do the work. 375 00:16:41,040 --> 00:16:43,199 I'd hate to say it, but I think I'm probably 376 00:16:43,200 --> 00:16:44,959 what makes Britain great. 377 00:16:44,960 --> 00:16:47,999 [laughter] 378 00:16:48,000 --> 00:16:49,399 You can see where it was after an hour. 379 00:16:49,400 --> 00:16:51,719 It's, uh... It's in Windsor. 380 00:16:51,720 --> 00:16:57,039 [laughter and applause] 381 00:16:57,040 --> 00:16:59,319 Ladies and gentlemen, a very clear winner of that task. 382 00:16:59,320 --> 00:17:01,159 A brilliant effort by all of our contestants, 383 00:17:01,160 --> 00:17:04,039 but the winner, very clearly, Mr Josh Widdicombe. 384 00:17:04,040 --> 00:17:07,940 [cheers and applause] 385 00:17:09,000 --> 00:17:10,359 Alex, how are the scores looking? 386 00:17:10,360 --> 00:17:12,999 I've updated the scoreboard. We can see it up there. 387 00:17:13,000 --> 00:17:15,999 Josh is well in the lead at the moment. 388 00:17:16,000 --> 00:17:17,519 - [audience] Oooh. - [Alex] So there we go. 389 00:17:17,520 --> 00:17:19,799 [applause] 390 00:17:19,800 --> 00:17:20,879 What's the next task? 391 00:17:20,880 --> 00:17:22,700 We can have a look at the next task now. 392 00:17:50,080 --> 00:17:53,020 "Grow the longest nail." 393 00:17:53,800 --> 00:17:55,759 "You have ten weeks." 394 00:17:55,760 --> 00:17:57,860 "Your time starts now." 395 00:17:59,400 --> 00:18:01,279 Genuinely excellent news to me, 396 00:18:01,280 --> 00:18:04,119 because I have strangely long big toes. 397 00:18:04,120 --> 00:18:06,119 [laughter] 398 00:18:06,120 --> 00:18:08,479 That's right. A genuinely disgusting task. 399 00:18:08,480 --> 00:18:11,220 Let's see how they get on, after the break. 400 00:18:19,320 --> 00:18:20,919 Welcome back to Taskmaster. 401 00:18:20,920 --> 00:18:23,799 Now, before the break, we revealed that our five contestants 402 00:18:23,800 --> 00:18:26,719 have been competing to grow the longest nail. 403 00:18:26,720 --> 00:18:28,100 Frank, how'd you get on? 404 00:18:28,840 --> 00:18:30,719 [they gasp] 405 00:18:30,720 --> 00:18:32,279 Would you like to have a look at that, Greg? 406 00:18:32,280 --> 00:18:34,199 I mean, I would like to have a closer look, 407 00:18:34,200 --> 00:18:36,740 but already from here I'm disgusted. 408 00:18:37,480 --> 00:18:39,759 [horrified gasps] 409 00:18:39,760 --> 00:18:43,020 Oh, 'cause you've got quite feminine hands as well, so... 410 00:18:43,840 --> 00:18:45,919 Well, I've never done a day's work in my life. 411 00:18:45,920 --> 00:18:48,559 Is this a trick of the camera? Have you actually substituted... 412 00:18:48,560 --> 00:18:50,829 Have you put a picture in front of the camera 413 00:18:50,830 --> 00:18:52,500 of a 60-year-old woman's thumb? 414 00:18:53,760 --> 00:18:56,959 - [Alex] It's 2.1 centimetres long. - Frank is 2.1 centimetres. 415 00:18:56,960 --> 00:18:58,639 Josh, can we see your nail? 416 00:18:58,640 --> 00:18:59,600 [Greg] Oh, no. 417 00:18:59,601 --> 00:19:01,079 - [they groan] - Oh, no. 418 00:19:01,080 --> 00:19:02,239 [Josh] Could I just say... 419 00:19:02,240 --> 00:19:06,060 That this is probably the worst thing you're ever gonna see. 420 00:19:09,160 --> 00:19:11,199 [everyone gasps] 421 00:19:11,200 --> 00:19:13,260 It looks like an owl's foot! 422 00:19:15,240 --> 00:19:17,220 It actually looks like talons. 423 00:19:18,000 --> 00:19:19,000 [Josh] Do you wanna touch it? 424 00:19:19,001 --> 00:19:21,759 It looks like an old man's thumb has been put onto... 425 00:19:21,760 --> 00:19:24,580 [Alex] 2.8 centimetres. 426 00:19:25,560 --> 00:19:29,159 [applause] 427 00:19:29,160 --> 00:19:30,239 I mean, well done. 428 00:19:30,240 --> 00:19:31,040 [Josh] Cheers, mate. 429 00:19:31,041 --> 00:19:33,179 Well done for living with that. 430 00:19:33,180 --> 00:19:35,119 [Greg] How did Roisin get on? 431 00:19:35,120 --> 00:19:36,759 I... bit mine. 432 00:19:36,760 --> 00:19:38,199 [laughter] 433 00:19:38,200 --> 00:19:41,199 Roisin crashes in at last place, I would imagine. 434 00:19:41,200 --> 00:19:43,239 [Alex] 1.8 centimetres. 435 00:19:43,240 --> 00:19:45,860 [Greg] 1.8 centimetres for Roisin. 436 00:19:46,720 --> 00:19:48,999 [applause] 437 00:19:49,000 --> 00:19:50,479 Romesh, what have you got for us? 438 00:19:50,480 --> 00:19:51,599 Lemme just show you. There you go. 439 00:19:51,600 --> 00:19:52,860 I've decorated it. 440 00:19:53,640 --> 00:19:56,639 Oh, my God. It's curled over. 441 00:19:56,640 --> 00:19:58,999 That's supposed to be like a face. 442 00:19:59,000 --> 00:20:00,319 [Roisin] Why is it curled over? 443 00:20:00,320 --> 00:20:01,580 [Josh screams] 444 00:20:02,640 --> 00:20:05,580 [Josh] Oh, my God! What is wrong with you? 445 00:20:06,720 --> 00:20:08,700 [Romesh] Well, I did, uh... 446 00:20:11,000 --> 00:20:14,999 That's supposed to be a face. I thought if I put dots and a smile... 447 00:20:15,000 --> 00:20:18,199 A couple more weeks' growth and you're gonna be able to hang from that. 448 00:20:18,200 --> 00:20:20,159 [Alex] Would you mind measuring that, Romesh? 449 00:20:20,160 --> 00:20:21,160 Not at all. 450 00:20:21,161 --> 00:20:23,719 That is just the most horrifying thing I've ever seen. 451 00:20:23,720 --> 00:20:26,839 Oh, you can shut your mouth. 452 00:20:26,840 --> 00:20:29,279 - [Alex] 2.2 centimetres. - [Greg] Wow. 453 00:20:29,280 --> 00:20:30,559 - [Alex] Not as long as... - [Greg] Impressive. 454 00:20:30,560 --> 00:20:32,519 [applause] 455 00:20:32,520 --> 00:20:33,639 How did Tim get on? 456 00:20:33,640 --> 00:20:35,439 I couldn't do this one. 457 00:20:35,440 --> 00:20:36,799 For religious reasons? 458 00:20:36,800 --> 00:20:39,820 No, but I've got a note of exemption. 459 00:20:40,840 --> 00:20:41,840 [Tim] Do you want me to read it? 460 00:20:41,841 --> 00:20:42,879 Yes, please. 461 00:20:42,880 --> 00:20:45,159 "To whom it may concern, Tim Key was employed as an actor 462 00:20:45,160 --> 00:20:48,559 in Daniel Kitson's production of Tree at the Old Vic Theatre in London." 463 00:20:48,560 --> 00:20:52,279 "The character he portrayed was a nervous man who would bite his nails anxiously." 464 00:20:52,280 --> 00:20:54,839 "As such, he was unable to undertake the task." 465 00:20:54,840 --> 00:20:56,980 "Thank you, Jen. Jenefer Tait." 466 00:20:57,760 --> 00:21:01,039 [applause] 467 00:21:01,040 --> 00:21:02,759 I saw Tree. 468 00:21:02,760 --> 00:21:04,959 - Yeah, I was with you. - You were with me that night. 469 00:21:04,960 --> 00:21:07,239 "It's a fabulous play, I was enthralled." The Guardian. 470 00:21:07,240 --> 00:21:09,759 [laughter] 471 00:21:09,760 --> 00:21:12,039 But you wore shoes throughout. 472 00:21:12,040 --> 00:21:14,679 - [Josh] Yes, I saw that. - So you could've grown a toenail. 473 00:21:14,680 --> 00:21:17,319 You have to have, like, a backstory to the character. 474 00:21:17,320 --> 00:21:19,639 And so I was biting them as well. 475 00:21:19,640 --> 00:21:21,319 [laughter] 476 00:21:21,320 --> 00:21:24,359 What were you hoping was gonna come out of the whole excuse note thing? 477 00:21:24,360 --> 00:21:27,599 Well, I thought there'd be, like, a general voided round. 478 00:21:27,600 --> 00:21:30,119 I'm not going through that to have it voided off! 479 00:21:30,120 --> 00:21:31,439 [laughter] 480 00:21:31,440 --> 00:21:32,879 Without question, the winner of that 481 00:21:32,880 --> 00:21:35,759 is Josh "Repulsive Feet" Widdicombe. 482 00:21:35,760 --> 00:21:39,559 [applause] 483 00:21:39,560 --> 00:21:41,039 Alex, how has that affected the scores? 484 00:21:41,040 --> 00:21:44,159 Well, we're halfway, and here's the scoreboard. 485 00:21:44,160 --> 00:21:47,639 Josh is in the lead at the moment. So, there we go. 486 00:21:47,640 --> 00:21:52,119 [applause] 487 00:21:52,120 --> 00:21:52,930 What was next? 488 00:21:52,931 --> 00:21:54,860 OK, let's have a look at the next task. 489 00:22:04,920 --> 00:22:05,999 - [Roisin] Hello. - [Romesh] Hello. 490 00:22:06,000 --> 00:22:08,079 - Hello, Alex. - Hello. 491 00:22:08,080 --> 00:22:08,880 How are you? 492 00:22:08,881 --> 00:22:10,300 - [Josh] Hello! - [Roisin] Hello! 493 00:22:11,640 --> 00:22:13,079 - Hi, Frank. - Morning. 494 00:22:13,080 --> 00:22:14,180 Shall I, uh... 495 00:22:15,520 --> 00:22:19,479 "Make this bed to a hotel standard while holding hands." 496 00:22:19,480 --> 00:22:21,839 [Tim chuckles] 497 00:22:21,840 --> 00:22:23,759 "Your time ends when you get into the bed." 498 00:22:23,760 --> 00:22:25,099 "Fastest wins." 499 00:22:25,100 --> 00:22:27,559 "Hold hands now..." Wait, I don't understand! 500 00:22:27,560 --> 00:22:28,919 We've got to make the bed, holding hands? 501 00:22:28,920 --> 00:22:31,519 Do all three of us have to be in a chain the whole time? 502 00:22:31,520 --> 00:22:34,460 "Hold hands now. Your time starts now." 503 00:22:35,240 --> 00:22:36,839 - Good to see you, Frank. - Good to see you. 504 00:22:36,840 --> 00:22:38,639 I feel you've already got an advantage. 505 00:22:38,640 --> 00:22:39,160 Why? 506 00:22:39,161 --> 00:22:42,759 Because I've put my right hand out of action. 507 00:22:42,760 --> 00:22:44,719 - You've got yours. - Oh, but I'm left-handed. 508 00:22:44,720 --> 00:22:47,919 - [Frank] Oh! - [laughter] 509 00:22:47,920 --> 00:22:50,479 - Then we've made a terrible error. - [Tim laughs] 510 00:22:50,480 --> 00:22:51,599 [Frank] Terrible error. 511 00:22:51,600 --> 00:22:54,559 [applause] 512 00:22:54,560 --> 00:22:57,279 How did we decide how to group the people together? 513 00:22:57,280 --> 00:22:58,959 It's kind of a maths thing again. 514 00:22:58,960 --> 00:23:01,319 Frank and Tim, their ages, they add up to a hundred, 515 00:23:01,320 --> 00:23:03,239 as do the three of these guys. 516 00:23:03,240 --> 00:23:05,239 - [laughter] - I'm 24. 517 00:23:05,240 --> 00:23:07,519 [laughter] 518 00:23:07,520 --> 00:23:09,439 Start with the youngsters... 519 00:23:09,440 --> 00:23:10,999 [Josh] Hang on! Shit, watch out! 520 00:23:11,000 --> 00:23:12,239 [Roisin] It doesn't matter. 521 00:23:12,240 --> 00:23:14,129 [Josh] It's hotel standard! You don't want tennis court on it. 522 00:23:14,130 --> 00:23:14,960 [Roisin] We can dust it off. 523 00:23:14,961 --> 00:23:16,839 I mean, they haven't said which hotel, though, 524 00:23:16,840 --> 00:23:18,599 'cause that's Travelodge all over, that. 525 00:23:18,600 --> 00:23:20,199 - [Romesh] So you want this? - [Josh] OK, Rom? 526 00:23:20,200 --> 00:23:21,719 - [Romesh] Yes, I've got it. - [Roisin] Yeah? 527 00:23:21,720 --> 00:23:23,169 - [Josh] Got that? - [Romesh] Yep, got it. 528 00:23:23,170 --> 00:23:24,879 [Roisin] Wait, let me get my corner. Ready? 529 00:23:24,880 --> 00:23:26,559 - [Roisin] Got it? - [Romesh] Got it. Definitely got it. 530 00:23:26,560 --> 00:23:28,919 [Josh] Wait, wait. I can help here. 531 00:23:28,920 --> 00:23:30,119 You don't need to shake it. 532 00:23:30,120 --> 00:23:31,319 Right, have a shake. 533 00:23:31,320 --> 00:23:32,639 [Romesh] You just said, "You don't need to shake!" 534 00:23:32,640 --> 00:23:33,989 Now you want us to shake. 535 00:23:33,990 --> 00:23:35,274 [Roisin] OK. 536 00:23:35,275 --> 00:23:37,359 [Romesh laughs] No, you're just... 537 00:23:37,360 --> 00:23:40,079 - [Josh] What are you doing?! - I'm trying to get the pillow on! 538 00:23:40,080 --> 00:23:42,780 [Romesh] You're just moving the sheet up and down the pillow. 539 00:23:43,720 --> 00:23:45,519 [Romesh] The buttons are wrong! The buttons are wrong. 540 00:23:45,520 --> 00:23:46,599 - [Josh] No, it's not. - [Roisin] They are! 541 00:23:46,600 --> 00:23:48,479 [Romesh] Why is there this loose flap here? There's a hole... 542 00:23:48,480 --> 00:23:50,639 This is what's wrong with the world. 543 00:23:50,640 --> 00:23:52,639 [Josh] Let's just enjoy ourselves. 544 00:23:52,640 --> 00:23:55,359 Come on, Rois! Put some fucking effort in. 545 00:23:55,360 --> 00:23:56,959 [Josh] Right, done. Pillows! 546 00:23:56,960 --> 00:23:58,359 Let me swap, then you do the pillows. 547 00:23:58,360 --> 00:24:00,879 Let me hold Josh's. I can go in the middle. 548 00:24:00,880 --> 00:24:03,899 [Josh] Auld Lang Syne. Right. 549 00:24:03,900 --> 00:24:06,839 [they giggle] 550 00:24:06,840 --> 00:24:08,919 - [Roisin] I need to go-- - [Josh] Wait, wait. There we go. 551 00:24:08,920 --> 00:24:13,079 No, we want me in the middle. You two let go of each other. 552 00:24:13,080 --> 00:24:15,159 There you go, I'm in the middle. Go! 553 00:24:15,160 --> 00:24:18,399 - [Roisin] No, I'm in the middle! - [Josh] Oh, are you in the middle? 554 00:24:18,400 --> 00:24:19,439 OK. 555 00:24:19,440 --> 00:24:21,799 [Romesh] Duvet first or pillows first? 556 00:24:21,800 --> 00:24:24,879 [Roisin] Whoa, whoa, whoa! Oh, my God! 557 00:24:24,880 --> 00:24:25,800 [she screams] 558 00:24:25,801 --> 00:24:28,660 [laughter] 559 00:24:29,840 --> 00:24:32,399 [they giggle] 560 00:24:32,400 --> 00:24:35,340 - Oh, my God. Brilliant. - Same again? 561 00:24:38,080 --> 00:24:40,079 - [Josh] I've dreamed of this moment. - [Roisin] What do you mean... 562 00:24:40,080 --> 00:24:42,200 [Josh] Bend your legs so we can get the duvet over us. 563 00:24:43,600 --> 00:24:45,239 - [Alex] I'm stopping the clock. - [Roisin] There we are. 564 00:24:45,240 --> 00:24:46,319 [Josh] I think that was alright. 565 00:24:46,320 --> 00:24:47,940 [Roisin] That was really good going. 566 00:24:49,480 --> 00:24:53,759 [applause] 567 00:24:53,760 --> 00:24:55,239 We were at a massive disadvantage to these two. 568 00:24:55,240 --> 00:24:55,760 [Tim] No, no, no. 569 00:24:55,761 --> 00:24:58,399 - Huge disadvantage. - How were you at a massive disadvantage? 570 00:24:58,400 --> 00:25:00,079 - [Roisin] You've got a third person. - [Josh] 'Cause there's three people. 571 00:25:00,080 --> 00:25:03,159 You've got a third person whose hands are both out of action, 572 00:25:03,160 --> 00:25:05,559 and you're just dragging them along. It's more difficult. 573 00:25:05,560 --> 00:25:08,239 If you had a three-legged race, that'd be easier than a... 574 00:25:08,240 --> 00:25:11,439 But you're suggesting that the person in the middle is a hindrance. 575 00:25:11,440 --> 00:25:12,280 [Roisin] Yes. 576 00:25:12,281 --> 00:25:14,639 They held a massive advantage, having three. 577 00:25:14,640 --> 00:25:17,879 You have to keep moving people around and putting them in the middle. 578 00:25:17,880 --> 00:25:21,719 Yeah, but for a start, you had three intelligent people to work on the task... 579 00:25:21,720 --> 00:25:22,280 Yeah. 580 00:25:22,281 --> 00:25:25,439 - We had one. Secondly... - [laughter] 581 00:25:25,440 --> 00:25:28,439 Secondly, wingspan is an advantage. 582 00:25:28,440 --> 00:25:31,239 Yeah, in case you want to take a quick fly in between the sheets. 583 00:25:31,240 --> 00:25:33,719 I saw an albatross make a bed like that in 34 seconds. 584 00:25:33,720 --> 00:25:35,119 [laughter] 585 00:25:35,120 --> 00:25:37,519 You're almost suggesting that a crab 586 00:25:37,520 --> 00:25:39,879 would be better off without its middle section. 587 00:25:39,880 --> 00:25:42,099 - That's exactly what I'm saying. - [Greg] Yeah. 588 00:25:42,100 --> 00:25:44,439 Let's see how two people got on. 589 00:25:44,440 --> 00:25:46,679 If it's got gravel on it, is it still 590 00:25:46,680 --> 00:25:48,239 - made to a hotel standard? - [Tim cackles] 591 00:25:48,240 --> 00:25:50,239 - [Tim laughs] - Oh, my God! 592 00:25:50,240 --> 00:25:53,559 [Frank] This is gonna be the hardest bit, isn't it? Getting under the mattress. 593 00:25:53,560 --> 00:25:56,519 [Frank] Was there a dog there that we didn't notice? 594 00:25:56,520 --> 00:25:57,719 [Tim giggles] I think so, yeah. 595 00:25:57,720 --> 00:25:58,940 [Frank] Is that a pillow? 596 00:25:59,880 --> 00:26:01,639 - [Tim] I got it, I got it. - [Frank] OK. 597 00:26:01,640 --> 00:26:03,119 OK, here, you hold that. 598 00:26:03,120 --> 00:26:05,740 Give me this hand and you... [he laughs] 599 00:26:06,840 --> 00:26:10,879 This is why conjoined twins just use those double sleeping bags. 600 00:26:10,880 --> 00:26:14,279 [Frank] Won't be the first time I've left saliva on a hotel pillow. 601 00:26:14,280 --> 00:26:15,820 [muffled giggling] 602 00:26:17,400 --> 00:26:20,439 [Frank] Oh, here it is. There it is. Yeah, this is gonna be... 603 00:26:20,440 --> 00:26:22,209 Look, if I take the other corner... 604 00:26:22,210 --> 00:26:24,959 OK, I'm gonna go in here. Hang on, hang on. 605 00:26:24,960 --> 00:26:28,239 - If you give me that corner inside... - No, no, no, no, no. 606 00:26:28,240 --> 00:26:30,239 Yeah, that'll be good. 607 00:26:30,240 --> 00:26:32,220 [Frank] This is what you need to do, isn't it? 608 00:26:32,960 --> 00:26:34,079 [Tim] Wait, wait, wait. 609 00:26:34,080 --> 00:26:37,039 [Frank] Is it in? I think it's in. Don't let go of my hand. 610 00:26:37,040 --> 00:26:39,159 OK. I don't know why you're not on the bed. 611 00:26:39,160 --> 00:26:41,119 I think we need to start buttoning. 612 00:26:41,120 --> 00:26:43,319 - "Bottling"? - "But-ton-ing"! 613 00:26:43,320 --> 00:26:45,919 Oh, now we've got a language problem. 614 00:26:45,920 --> 00:26:48,559 You start buttoning at that end, I'll start buttoning at this end... 615 00:26:48,560 --> 00:26:50,079 I can't button with just one... Can I? 616 00:26:50,080 --> 00:26:52,359 You can use your thigh as a buttoning table. 617 00:26:52,360 --> 00:26:53,519 What was that phrase, Frank? 618 00:26:53,520 --> 00:26:55,399 "You can use your thigh as a buttoning table." 619 00:26:55,400 --> 00:26:56,080 Thank you. 620 00:26:56,081 --> 00:26:57,679 - That's fine, isn't it? - Don't be fussy, Frank. 621 00:26:57,680 --> 00:27:00,839 I'd be happy to walk into a hotel and see that. Are we done? 622 00:27:00,840 --> 00:27:03,279 [Alex] I'm not sure if you've read the task properly. 623 00:27:03,280 --> 00:27:06,500 - [Tim] Oh, we lie in the bed! - [Frank] We have to get into it! 624 00:27:08,160 --> 00:27:11,079 - Do we have to get to sleep? - [Frank laughs] 625 00:27:11,080 --> 00:27:12,080 [Alex] Stop the clock! 626 00:27:12,081 --> 00:27:14,260 - Good night, Tim. - Good night, Frank. 627 00:27:16,480 --> 00:27:20,079 [applause] 628 00:27:20,080 --> 00:27:22,279 I'm tempted to give an extra point for "Good night, Frank." 629 00:27:22,280 --> 00:27:24,959 It was genuinely a lovely sweet moment. 630 00:27:24,960 --> 00:27:27,999 Who did it the fastest? Let's give it to the winners based on that. 631 00:27:28,000 --> 00:27:30,559 Two points each for the winners depending on who made it the fastest. 632 00:27:30,560 --> 00:27:32,519 [Greg] They were both a high standard, as far as I'm concerned. 633 00:27:32,520 --> 00:27:36,439 Well, the children took 16 minutes and 3 seconds. 634 00:27:36,440 --> 00:27:37,320 Incredible. 635 00:27:37,321 --> 00:27:39,759 The grown-ups, 10 minutes and 57 seconds. 636 00:27:39,760 --> 00:27:42,799 [Greg] Well, there you go. Clear winners. 637 00:27:42,800 --> 00:27:46,980 [applause] 638 00:27:48,400 --> 00:27:50,039 Alex, what are the scores? 639 00:27:50,040 --> 00:27:52,149 OK. Well, if we have a look here, 640 00:27:52,150 --> 00:27:55,039 you can see the leader is Mr Josh Widdicombe. 641 00:27:55,040 --> 00:27:58,559 [applause] 642 00:27:58,560 --> 00:28:01,380 I've got this. Time for another task! 643 00:28:05,920 --> 00:28:07,900 - How are you? - Good, thanks. 644 00:28:17,080 --> 00:28:18,180 Ooh. 645 00:28:22,400 --> 00:28:25,999 "Make this Swedish person blush." 646 00:28:26,000 --> 00:28:30,199 "Make this Swedish pershon..." [she laughs] 647 00:28:30,200 --> 00:28:31,980 I've already got the accent. 648 00:28:32,880 --> 00:28:35,439 "Make this Swedish person blush as deeply..." 649 00:28:35,440 --> 00:28:38,479 "Make this Swedish person blush as deeply as possible." 650 00:28:38,480 --> 00:28:40,239 - Are you Swedish? - Yeah. 651 00:28:40,240 --> 00:28:41,500 I love Swedes. 652 00:28:43,800 --> 00:28:46,939 "You have ten minutes. Your time starts now." 653 00:28:46,940 --> 00:28:48,599 [incredulous laugh] 654 00:28:48,600 --> 00:28:50,580 My God, that's impossible. 655 00:28:51,440 --> 00:28:52,759 Um... 656 00:28:52,760 --> 00:28:55,839 [applause] 657 00:28:55,840 --> 00:28:58,999 Josh, my feeling is, just from that tiny little moment there, 658 00:28:59,000 --> 00:29:01,719 that you are the most uncomfortable with this task. 659 00:29:01,720 --> 00:29:03,660 It was the worst ten minutes of my life. 660 00:29:05,000 --> 00:29:09,119 Let's see the tension between Josh and a... Swedish man? 661 00:29:09,120 --> 00:29:11,220 [laughter] 662 00:29:12,080 --> 00:29:12,940 What's the most... 663 00:29:12,941 --> 00:29:14,879 So, let's talk about embarrassment, then. 664 00:29:14,880 --> 00:29:17,999 - Mm-hm. - Have you ever had sex? 665 00:29:18,000 --> 00:29:19,000 Yeah. 666 00:29:19,001 --> 00:29:21,439 Have you seen any of the Emmanuelle movies? 667 00:29:21,440 --> 00:29:22,400 No. 668 00:29:22,401 --> 00:29:24,639 OK. Do you... 669 00:29:24,640 --> 00:29:27,119 How do you imagine Alex Horne's naked body? 670 00:29:27,120 --> 00:29:28,239 Never. 671 00:29:28,240 --> 00:29:30,719 - But you are now. - Yeah, I am now. 672 00:29:30,720 --> 00:29:33,559 Yeah, so what are you picturing now? 673 00:29:33,560 --> 00:29:36,020 How do you feel about communal showers? 674 00:29:37,320 --> 00:29:38,919 No problem with that, no. 675 00:29:38,920 --> 00:29:40,479 - No? - No. 676 00:29:40,480 --> 00:29:42,519 [laughter] 677 00:29:42,520 --> 00:29:46,380 It's quite weird, 'cause it's difficult to know what... 678 00:29:47,520 --> 00:29:51,399 So, who would be your dream celebrity to bed? 679 00:29:51,400 --> 00:29:53,959 - No idea, actually. - There's no celebrities you fancy? 680 00:29:53,960 --> 00:29:54,840 Not really. 681 00:29:54,841 --> 00:29:57,199 - Claudia Winkleman? - Don't know. 682 00:29:57,200 --> 00:30:00,039 You don't know who Claudia Winkleman is? 683 00:30:00,040 --> 00:30:01,439 Um... 684 00:30:01,440 --> 00:30:02,900 [blows whistle] 685 00:30:03,800 --> 00:30:06,119 - He's a tough nut to crack. - [Alex chuckles] 686 00:30:06,120 --> 00:30:07,319 [Alex] Thanks, Josh. 687 00:30:07,320 --> 00:30:09,740 No worries. That was the toughest task yet. 688 00:30:11,600 --> 00:30:13,159 That's not helped. Oh, no. 689 00:30:13,160 --> 00:30:16,460 [laughter] 690 00:30:19,960 --> 00:30:20,720 See you later. 691 00:30:20,721 --> 00:30:22,359 [applause] 692 00:30:22,360 --> 00:30:24,959 Do you fancy Claudia Winkleman? 693 00:30:24,960 --> 00:30:27,319 - Let's not go into that. - [laughter] 694 00:30:27,320 --> 00:30:30,159 Well, they're interesting frames of sexual reference for you. 695 00:30:30,160 --> 00:30:34,559 - Alex Horne, the Emmanuelle films... - [laughter] 696 00:30:34,560 --> 00:30:37,639 They are 1970s soft porn films. 697 00:30:37,640 --> 00:30:39,759 Uh, communal showers... 698 00:30:39,760 --> 00:30:43,999 and then the leap to Claudia Winkleman intrigued me. 699 00:30:44,000 --> 00:30:46,119 I'm sweating so much now. 700 00:30:46,120 --> 00:30:48,039 [laughter] 701 00:30:48,040 --> 00:30:49,940 Let's see how Frank and Romesh got on. 702 00:30:51,960 --> 00:30:53,340 - Hello. - Hi. 703 00:30:54,400 --> 00:30:56,359 Will you do whatever I ask you to do? 704 00:30:56,360 --> 00:30:58,319 - Probably not. - Probably not? 705 00:30:58,320 --> 00:31:00,559 What kind of things make you blush, would you say? 706 00:31:00,560 --> 00:31:01,400 Don't know. 707 00:31:01,401 --> 00:31:04,079 What about if somebody speaks to you really close up? 708 00:31:04,080 --> 00:31:06,420 Don't you find that a bit strange? 709 00:31:07,440 --> 00:31:10,479 Your ears are completely devoid of hair. 710 00:31:10,480 --> 00:31:11,839 [laughter] 711 00:31:11,840 --> 00:31:14,700 - What are you like with physical contact? - Oh, that's fine. Yeah. 712 00:31:16,080 --> 00:31:17,420 That makes you feel weird? 713 00:31:18,400 --> 00:31:21,039 Fred, I'm worried that I'm getting a bit of a pot belly. 714 00:31:21,040 --> 00:31:23,879 - [laughter] - What do you think? 715 00:31:23,880 --> 00:31:25,639 Fine. 716 00:31:25,640 --> 00:31:27,879 Is there a reason you're not making eye contact with me? 717 00:31:27,880 --> 00:31:30,519 Not really, no. I could make eye contact... 718 00:31:30,520 --> 00:31:33,839 Now we're getting on, aren't we? We're really getting on. 719 00:31:33,840 --> 00:31:36,839 I have a surprisingly bulbous vein 720 00:31:36,840 --> 00:31:38,580 on my private parts. 721 00:31:40,000 --> 00:31:42,639 But it almost exactly resembles 722 00:31:42,640 --> 00:31:46,300 the point where the A40 joins the A315. 723 00:31:47,760 --> 00:31:49,399 I once got it out in a park 724 00:31:49,400 --> 00:31:53,260 to explain to a lady directions. And... 725 00:31:54,040 --> 00:31:55,559 it led to a court case. 726 00:31:55,560 --> 00:31:57,820 [laughter] 727 00:31:59,200 --> 00:32:00,319 How does that make you feel? 728 00:32:00,320 --> 00:32:01,599 Yeah. 729 00:32:01,600 --> 00:32:03,639 - I mean, I've got no idea. - [Fred laughs] 730 00:32:03,640 --> 00:32:05,759 I mean, I'm either gonna make him blush or I'm gonna sleep with him. 731 00:32:05,760 --> 00:32:08,039 [laughing] I don't know which one it's gonna be. 732 00:32:08,040 --> 00:32:10,799 You know what I'm talking about, though, don't you? 733 00:32:10,800 --> 00:32:12,679 [Frank sighs] 734 00:32:12,680 --> 00:32:14,639 Fred, I think you might have beaten me. 735 00:32:14,640 --> 00:32:16,839 I've got 30 seconds to embarrass you. 736 00:32:16,840 --> 00:32:18,029 [high-pitched] Here comes the nuzzle. 737 00:32:18,030 --> 00:32:18,840 You ready for the nuzzle? 738 00:32:18,841 --> 00:32:21,980 Nuzzle, nuzzle, nuzzle, nuzzle! 739 00:32:24,120 --> 00:32:26,820 [laughter] 740 00:32:28,160 --> 00:32:31,399 Come on, Fred... Freddie... 741 00:32:31,400 --> 00:32:32,320 [blows whistle] 742 00:32:32,321 --> 00:32:35,180 - [Fred laughs] - [Frank sighs] 743 00:32:37,200 --> 00:32:38,409 - I'm sorry. - No worries. 744 00:32:38,410 --> 00:32:39,320 I can only apologise. 745 00:32:39,321 --> 00:32:41,599 - That was just for the task, you know? - Yeah, yeah. 746 00:32:41,600 --> 00:32:43,599 But if you want to go for a drink or whatever, let me know. 747 00:32:43,600 --> 00:32:47,799 [laughter and applause] 748 00:32:47,800 --> 00:32:49,879 I mean, so desperate. 749 00:32:49,880 --> 00:32:51,619 Yeah, I'm not proud of that. 750 00:32:51,620 --> 00:32:54,019 I mean, you look proud of it. 751 00:32:54,020 --> 00:32:57,239 I thought we got on. I really thought we did. 752 00:32:57,240 --> 00:33:01,079 But what was disappointing was how little he blushed, 753 00:33:01,080 --> 00:33:05,639 and so the thing is that I realised I was just touching him a lot. 754 00:33:05,640 --> 00:33:07,719 And he wasn't blushing at all. 755 00:33:07,720 --> 00:33:10,119 And so I just thought, "I'm just groping a dude now." 756 00:33:10,120 --> 00:33:12,499 "I'm not achieving anything in the task." 757 00:33:12,500 --> 00:33:13,440 It was horrible. 758 00:33:13,441 --> 00:33:15,879 See, I thought that he was blushing, 759 00:33:15,880 --> 00:33:19,799 - but only from the neck down. - [laughter] 760 00:33:19,800 --> 00:33:21,999 Was anyone else surprised Frank Skinner's 761 00:33:22,000 --> 00:33:23,799 got the belly of a 15-year-old boy? 762 00:33:23,800 --> 00:33:25,740 [laughter] 763 00:33:26,720 --> 00:33:29,839 Powerful homoeroticism. I really enjoyed it. 764 00:33:29,840 --> 00:33:33,599 Be interesting to see if a poet comes in at a different angle. 765 00:33:33,600 --> 00:33:34,740 Let's have a look at Tim. 766 00:33:36,240 --> 00:33:38,359 [softly] Say something in Swedish. 767 00:33:38,360 --> 00:33:41,220 [speaks in Swedish] 768 00:33:42,320 --> 00:33:44,559 Um... Could you say something else? 769 00:33:44,560 --> 00:33:47,719 OK, can you say in Swedish, "This is my apartment"? 770 00:33:47,720 --> 00:33:49,719 [speaks in Swedish] 771 00:33:49,720 --> 00:33:51,380 "Make yourself comfortable." 772 00:33:52,480 --> 00:33:54,599 [speaks in Swedish] 773 00:33:54,600 --> 00:33:57,959 "I'm going to pour us both some sherry." 774 00:33:57,960 --> 00:34:01,039 [speaks in Swedish] 775 00:34:01,040 --> 00:34:02,799 I want you to say, "I like..." 776 00:34:02,800 --> 00:34:05,380 [he giggles] 777 00:34:08,360 --> 00:34:09,839 Can you say, "I like to..." 778 00:34:09,840 --> 00:34:14,859 [Tim laughs] 779 00:34:14,860 --> 00:34:17,679 Hang on. Let me get this right. 780 00:34:17,680 --> 00:34:18,400 [clears throat] 781 00:34:18,401 --> 00:34:21,479 "I like to parade around in my little denim shorts." 782 00:34:21,480 --> 00:34:23,580 [laughter] 783 00:34:25,320 --> 00:34:26,420 Are you blushing? 784 00:34:27,920 --> 00:34:30,359 Say, "When I get half a chance..." 785 00:34:30,360 --> 00:34:34,020 "I like to parade around in my little denim jeans... waving..." 786 00:34:35,160 --> 00:34:39,340 [speaks in Swedish] 787 00:34:40,360 --> 00:34:42,780 [speaks in Swedish] 788 00:34:43,960 --> 00:34:45,799 - Have you ever been handcuffed? - No. 789 00:34:45,800 --> 00:34:47,079 - You ever been whipped? - No. 790 00:34:47,080 --> 00:34:48,439 - Smothered in chocolate? - No. 791 00:34:48,440 --> 00:34:49,400 - Licked? - No. 792 00:34:49,400 --> 00:34:50,120 - Kicked? - No. 793 00:34:50,121 --> 00:34:51,639 - Kissed? - No. 794 00:34:51,640 --> 00:34:52,879 Look at me. 795 00:34:52,880 --> 00:34:54,359 [whispers] Yes. 796 00:34:54,360 --> 00:34:56,260 - Don't look at my lips. - [laughter] 797 00:34:58,560 --> 00:34:59,660 [blows whistle] 798 00:35:01,760 --> 00:35:06,819 [applause] 799 00:35:06,820 --> 00:35:08,279 I wish I'd kissed him. 800 00:35:08,280 --> 00:35:10,479 - If I had my chance again. - [laughter] 801 00:35:10,480 --> 00:35:12,319 I'd go and just blow on his lips. 802 00:35:12,320 --> 00:35:14,039 But actually, looking at it, I think he was blushing. 803 00:35:14,040 --> 00:35:17,199 I'll just write that down. "If I'd had my chance again..." 804 00:35:17,200 --> 00:35:19,859 "I would have blown on his lips." 805 00:35:19,860 --> 00:35:21,799 Yeah, it's a strange regret to have. 806 00:35:21,800 --> 00:35:23,519 - Really strange. - [laughter] 807 00:35:23,520 --> 00:35:26,559 Let's see if the woman in the group took a different approach. 808 00:35:26,560 --> 00:35:29,079 Have you ever met anyone with three breasts? 809 00:35:29,080 --> 00:35:29,520 No. 810 00:35:29,521 --> 00:35:31,580 Would you like to see someone with three breasts? 811 00:35:34,000 --> 00:35:36,020 - Yeah. - [she laughs] 812 00:35:37,960 --> 00:35:40,620 What about four? Is that too many? 813 00:35:42,320 --> 00:35:43,860 Yeah, that's too much. 814 00:35:44,880 --> 00:35:47,279 - Three's OK? - Three is OK. 815 00:35:47,280 --> 00:35:49,519 Four, out of the question. 816 00:35:49,520 --> 00:35:53,260 OK, what about if you put your head in between your legs? 817 00:35:54,640 --> 00:35:58,399 Not for dirty reasons. Just to colour it up. 818 00:35:58,400 --> 00:36:00,100 - Yeah. - Get a flush going. 819 00:36:06,000 --> 00:36:08,239 So, four breasts is too much? 820 00:36:08,240 --> 00:36:08,880 Yeah. 821 00:36:08,881 --> 00:36:10,319 - Three's sufficient. - Yeah. 822 00:36:10,320 --> 00:36:11,399 Where would you have the third? 823 00:36:11,400 --> 00:36:12,839 In the middle or round the back? 824 00:36:12,840 --> 00:36:14,739 - [laughter] - [Fred] In the middle. 825 00:36:14,740 --> 00:36:17,719 Alright. Same size, or just a mini one? 826 00:36:17,720 --> 00:36:19,439 Oh, why not a mini one? 827 00:36:19,440 --> 00:36:21,159 [laughter] 828 00:36:21,160 --> 00:36:22,719 [Fred] Yep, getting there. 829 00:36:22,720 --> 00:36:24,719 - [Roisin chuckles] - Whoa! 830 00:36:24,720 --> 00:36:26,059 Thank you. 831 00:36:26,060 --> 00:36:28,399 I think I'm gonna go with that as my finished... 832 00:36:28,400 --> 00:36:29,839 [Alex] You're stopping with four minutes to go? 833 00:36:29,840 --> 00:36:31,439 That's fine. Thank you very much, Fredrik. 834 00:36:31,440 --> 00:36:33,719 - Thank you. - You went very... very red. 835 00:36:33,720 --> 00:36:39,319 [cheers and applause] 836 00:36:39,320 --> 00:36:41,959 Roisin's the only person who thought to physically 837 00:36:41,960 --> 00:36:45,139 make him go red, by applying science, in a way. 838 00:36:45,140 --> 00:36:46,859 And I'm glad you thought of that, 839 00:36:46,860 --> 00:36:48,700 because I would argue that without that, 840 00:36:49,480 --> 00:36:53,839 mentioning a withered back- breast might not have... 841 00:36:53,840 --> 00:36:55,559 [Josh laughs] 842 00:36:55,560 --> 00:36:56,400 may not have done it. 843 00:36:56,401 --> 00:36:58,759 I was trying to unnerve him. I didn't want to be sexual. 844 00:36:58,760 --> 00:37:02,239 I'm not very good at being sexy, so I was just trying to unnerve him. 845 00:37:02,240 --> 00:37:04,119 Just make him feel like, "Oh, I don't know what she's gonna say!" 846 00:37:04,120 --> 00:37:06,039 Yeah, like you've got a mini tit on your back. 847 00:37:06,040 --> 00:37:08,279 [laughter] 848 00:37:08,280 --> 00:37:09,559 I wanted him to look worried that I might, 849 00:37:09,560 --> 00:37:11,799 sort of get, you know, a back-boob out. 850 00:37:11,800 --> 00:37:13,399 Thank God you used science. 851 00:37:13,400 --> 00:37:15,399 I suspect you may have nailed this, but Alex... 852 00:37:15,400 --> 00:37:19,199 - Show us the blush chart. - Roisin did make him go the reddest. 853 00:37:19,200 --> 00:37:22,399 Josh got him to Jasmine Shimmer. 854 00:37:22,400 --> 00:37:24,399 [laughter] 855 00:37:24,400 --> 00:37:25,919 Then it's Cherry Blossom for Tim, 856 00:37:25,920 --> 00:37:27,899 Fantasy Rose for Frank, 857 00:37:27,900 --> 00:37:29,279 Puce for Romesh, 858 00:37:29,280 --> 00:37:32,399 and Ballet Slipper slash Sangria from Roisin. 859 00:37:32,400 --> 00:37:34,599 Those are the exact bits, so Roisin wins. 860 00:37:34,600 --> 00:37:37,199 So the winner is Old "Me Back Tit" Conaty. 861 00:37:37,200 --> 00:37:42,399 [laughter and applause] 862 00:37:42,400 --> 00:37:44,119 Remember, someone is walking out of here 863 00:37:44,120 --> 00:37:46,919 with a cheque for probably £20,000, 864 00:37:46,920 --> 00:37:49,319 and a ring worth almost £4,000. 865 00:37:49,320 --> 00:37:51,519 And a cheap, shit ring. 866 00:37:51,520 --> 00:37:53,119 [laughter] 867 00:37:53,120 --> 00:37:57,020 See you after the break for the final part of the show and the final task. 868 00:38:03,880 --> 00:38:06,359 Welcome back to Taskmaster, where one of these comedians 869 00:38:06,360 --> 00:38:10,159 will be driving home in Romesh's absolutely rubbish car. 870 00:38:10,160 --> 00:38:11,839 Alex, who's in the lead so far? 871 00:38:11,840 --> 00:38:16,159 OK, so, Josh and Frank have both got 16 points. 872 00:38:16,160 --> 00:38:19,479 [cheers and applause] 873 00:38:19,480 --> 00:38:22,999 Some of our comics can't win now, but very much playing for pride. 874 00:38:23,000 --> 00:38:24,727 Shall we get Roisin to read out the task? 875 00:38:24,728 --> 00:38:26,479 [Alex] Why not. Would you mind reading that out? 876 00:38:26,480 --> 00:38:28,879 Have I been reduced to admin now? 877 00:38:28,880 --> 00:38:30,199 [Alex] Yes, you have. Yes. 878 00:38:30,200 --> 00:38:32,519 - It's just to make you feel a bit more special. - [Roisin] Right. 879 00:38:32,520 --> 00:38:35,239 "Blow up the biggest balloon whilst blindfolded." 880 00:38:35,240 --> 00:38:37,519 "You have 100 seconds and one balloon." 881 00:38:37,520 --> 00:38:39,479 - [Alex] Simple task. - [Tim] It's a good task. 882 00:38:39,480 --> 00:38:43,039 So you've got exactly 100 seconds to blow the biggest balloon you can 883 00:38:43,040 --> 00:38:44,999 from the moment that Alex blows the whistle. 884 00:38:45,000 --> 00:38:46,999 Yeah, there are a couple of things. You only have one balloon. 885 00:38:47,000 --> 00:38:49,919 At the end of the hundred seconds, the balloon must be tied. 886 00:38:49,920 --> 00:38:53,079 And if the balloon does burst, it won't be the biggest bubble. 887 00:38:53,080 --> 00:38:56,300 I'm absolutely terrified of blowing up balloons. 888 00:38:57,280 --> 00:38:59,159 You idiot. So, it's time to... 889 00:38:59,160 --> 00:39:00,879 [laughter] 890 00:39:00,880 --> 00:39:03,919 Can I say, we are tightly locked in the lead, 891 00:39:03,920 --> 00:39:06,900 and he's asthmatic and he's frightened of balloons. 892 00:39:07,640 --> 00:39:08,799 I'm feeling good. 893 00:39:08,800 --> 00:39:11,879 Are you more or less frightened of balloons 894 00:39:11,880 --> 00:39:13,759 than of physical contact with another man? 895 00:39:13,760 --> 00:39:15,399 [laughter] 896 00:39:15,400 --> 00:39:17,759 Oh, I'd prefer contact with another man to... 897 00:39:17,760 --> 00:39:20,399 Hold on, do we have a choice now? You didn't say that before. 898 00:39:20,400 --> 00:39:22,919 [laughter] 899 00:39:22,920 --> 00:39:24,519 Do we have to tie the end? 900 00:39:24,520 --> 00:39:27,759 [laughter] 901 00:39:27,760 --> 00:39:31,799 [applause] 902 00:39:31,800 --> 00:39:33,639 So, shall we start? 903 00:39:33,640 --> 00:39:36,899 [Alex] So, if you want to don your blindfolds now, please. 904 00:39:36,900 --> 00:39:39,359 - Balloons are being handed out now. - [Alex] If you hold out your hands. 905 00:39:39,360 --> 00:39:41,039 [Frank] Can I ask you, is this upside down? 906 00:39:41,040 --> 00:39:43,159 No, that's alright. You're fine, you're good. 907 00:39:43,160 --> 00:39:44,559 OK, there's your balloon. 908 00:39:44,560 --> 00:39:47,319 If you drop a Swedish guy's testes into my hand... 909 00:39:47,320 --> 00:39:49,119 [laughter] 910 00:39:49,120 --> 00:39:51,319 Just to remind you, you must tie the balloon at the end, 911 00:39:51,320 --> 00:39:53,519 and then hold it in front of you with the knot down. 912 00:39:53,520 --> 00:39:55,719 Could I just check everyone else is still here? 913 00:39:55,720 --> 00:39:57,319 [laughter] 914 00:39:57,320 --> 00:39:59,559 Why don't you put your hand out behind Roisin 915 00:39:59,560 --> 00:40:01,479 and see if you can feel a little breast? Then you'll know. 916 00:40:01,480 --> 00:40:04,219 [laughter] 917 00:40:04,220 --> 00:40:06,459 Oh, I'm loving this. 918 00:40:06,460 --> 00:40:08,540 - Start the competition. - [whistle blows] 919 00:40:10,160 --> 00:40:11,679 [Greg] Oh, lovely! Come on! 920 00:40:11,680 --> 00:40:15,420 [audience shouting] 921 00:40:23,840 --> 00:40:27,439 [cheering continues] 922 00:40:27,440 --> 00:40:29,719 You have one minute left. 923 00:40:29,720 --> 00:40:32,479 - One minute left. - [Greg] One minute left! 924 00:40:32,480 --> 00:40:34,900 [laughter] 925 00:40:38,240 --> 00:40:39,919 I'm terrified! 926 00:40:39,920 --> 00:40:41,500 - [balloon pops] - [everyone screams] 927 00:40:42,760 --> 00:40:45,900 - [Josh] Oh, my God! - [Tim screams] 928 00:40:47,760 --> 00:40:50,119 You've got to keep your nerve. How many seconds left, Alex? 929 00:40:50,120 --> 00:40:51,479 They have 40 seconds left. 930 00:40:51,480 --> 00:40:52,740 Forty seconds! 931 00:40:54,000 --> 00:40:55,266 You must tie the balloon. 932 00:40:55,267 --> 00:40:57,119 Frank is tying, Frank is tying. 933 00:40:57,120 --> 00:40:58,959 It's very early to be tying! 934 00:40:58,960 --> 00:41:00,839 You've got 25 seconds left. 935 00:41:00,840 --> 00:41:02,119 [Greg] 25 seconds left! 936 00:41:02,120 --> 00:41:04,060 [Alex] They are struggling with the balloons. 937 00:41:06,320 --> 00:41:08,479 Stop! Stop this. Stop it. 938 00:41:08,480 --> 00:41:11,599 Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. 939 00:41:11,600 --> 00:41:13,359 [Josh] What's happening? 940 00:41:13,360 --> 00:41:14,799 [Alex] You've got ten seconds. 941 00:41:14,800 --> 00:41:17,479 [laughter] 942 00:41:17,480 --> 00:41:20,039 - Ten seconds! - [Alex] Four, three... 943 00:41:20,040 --> 00:41:22,159 [Greg] One big last cheer, ten seconds left. 944 00:41:22,160 --> 00:41:23,679 [audience cheers] 945 00:41:23,680 --> 00:41:25,039 [blows whistle] 946 00:41:25,040 --> 00:41:26,799 [applause] 947 00:41:26,800 --> 00:41:28,679 [Alex] You must hold your balloon at the side now. 948 00:41:28,680 --> 00:41:30,500 I'll just... That's fine. 949 00:41:31,680 --> 00:41:33,239 And that... 950 00:41:33,240 --> 00:41:35,959 That was one of the most terrifying things that's ever happened to me. 951 00:41:35,960 --> 00:41:37,159 [laughter] 952 00:41:37,160 --> 00:41:40,119 You may now take your blindfolds off. 953 00:41:40,120 --> 00:41:41,319 Oh, well, I've had a nightmare. 954 00:41:41,320 --> 00:41:46,439 [laughter] 955 00:41:46,440 --> 00:41:49,860 I think it's safe to say Widdicombe has blown his lead. 956 00:41:52,080 --> 00:41:53,839 Can you all retake your chairs, please? 957 00:41:53,840 --> 00:41:55,439 Ladies and gentlemen, the balloon blowers. 958 00:41:55,440 --> 00:41:59,419 [applause] 959 00:41:59,420 --> 00:42:02,719 Welcome back. Incredibly tense balloon task. 960 00:42:02,720 --> 00:42:04,759 Alex, who won the task? 961 00:42:04,760 --> 00:42:07,159 In a lovely way, Roisin won the task. 962 00:42:07,160 --> 00:42:08,839 She won the honour back, so well done Roisin. 963 00:42:08,840 --> 00:42:10,860 - Roisin Conaty! - [applause] 964 00:42:12,360 --> 00:42:15,199 - [Romesh] Well done. - Thank you. Thanks, guys. 965 00:42:15,200 --> 00:42:16,879 Really, really nice balloon-blowing. 966 00:42:16,880 --> 00:42:19,639 I was quite patronising when I said that, but I didn't mean to, 967 00:42:19,640 --> 00:42:21,439 I was just pleased for your honour. 968 00:42:21,440 --> 00:42:23,039 It's 'cause you'd done so badly in the all the others. 969 00:42:23,040 --> 00:42:24,239 That's what I'm... Yeah. 970 00:42:24,240 --> 00:42:29,199 Tim came second, although Tim didn't tie the balloon 971 00:42:29,200 --> 00:42:30,980 - during the 100 seconds. - [he gasps] 972 00:42:31,840 --> 00:42:33,239 [Greg] Oh, dear. 973 00:42:33,240 --> 00:42:35,559 - That is a shame. - Sorry. So, what happens there? 974 00:42:35,560 --> 00:42:37,559 I mean, you don't get any points in that round. 975 00:42:37,560 --> 00:42:40,039 Josh Widdicombe came last, with a tiny little balloon. 976 00:42:40,040 --> 00:42:42,040 Well, of course he did. Did you see the size of it? 977 00:42:42,800 --> 00:42:46,279 I was hoping that I'd be the only one that didn't pop. 978 00:42:46,280 --> 00:42:49,599 Romesh came second-last and Frank Skinner came third. 979 00:42:49,600 --> 00:42:50,919 Wow. 980 00:42:50,920 --> 00:42:55,300 - [laughter] - [applause] 981 00:42:58,880 --> 00:43:02,119 But let's see how that has affected the final scores, 982 00:43:02,120 --> 00:43:06,489 because someone is going home with a car, a ring, 983 00:43:06,490 --> 00:43:09,199 and a whole lot of money. 984 00:43:09,200 --> 00:43:11,637 Alex, can you reveal the final scores? 985 00:43:11,638 --> 00:43:12,780 OK. Here we go. 986 00:43:15,480 --> 00:43:22,620 [cheers and applause] 987 00:43:24,320 --> 00:43:27,639 Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of Taskmaster, 988 00:43:27,640 --> 00:43:28,879 Mr Frank Skinner. 989 00:43:28,880 --> 00:43:31,639 [applause] 990 00:43:31,640 --> 00:43:32,999 How do you feel? 991 00:43:33,000 --> 00:43:36,439 Oh, fanta-- Is the car still registered in your name? 992 00:43:36,440 --> 00:43:37,240 Yeah. 993 00:43:37,241 --> 00:43:39,559 Maybe I'll do a hit-and-run on the way home. 994 00:43:39,560 --> 00:43:41,559 [laughter] 995 00:43:41,560 --> 00:43:43,959 I mean, why wouldn't you? 996 00:43:43,960 --> 00:43:47,479 Well, thank you, everyone. Especially to you, Alex. 997 00:43:47,480 --> 00:43:48,200 Thank you. 998 00:43:48,201 --> 00:43:50,919 - Um, that's what it says. - [laughter] 999 00:43:50,920 --> 00:43:55,119 And Frank Skinner will now go and collect his prizes. 1000 00:43:55,120 --> 00:44:00,319 [cheers and applause] 1001 00:44:00,320 --> 00:44:02,359 There you go, that's the end of the show. Thank you for watching. 1002 00:44:02,360 --> 00:44:07,779 Don't forget: the humblest of tasks get beautified if loving hands do them. 1003 00:44:07,780 --> 00:44:09,599 Never forget that. 1004 00:44:09,600 --> 00:44:12,639 Good night. And well done, Mr Frank Skinner! 1005 00:44:12,640 --> 00:44:15,780 [applause] 1006 00:44:23,720 --> 00:44:26,540 [audience groans] 1007 00:44:27,400 --> 00:44:31,460 [subtitles by tribbletown]