1 00:00:09,275 --> 00:00:11,678 [ Engine Revving ] ???? [ Rock ] 2 00:02:33,286 --> 00:02:34,787 [ Teenage Girl Narrating ] GOD, ISN'T HE ADORABLE? 3 00:02:35,288 --> 00:02:38,224 HE'S MY BOYFRIEND, AND WE'RE GOING TO BE MARRIED AND HAVE KIDS... 4 00:02:38,725 --> 00:02:40,727 AND GO TO COLLEGE TOGETHER SOMEDAY. 5 00:02:40,727 --> 00:02:44,597 IF YOU OVERLOOK THE STORY OF OUR EXCRUCIATING SENIOR YEAR, 6 00:02:44,597 --> 00:02:47,100 HE'S THE ULTIMATE FUTURE HUSBAND. 7 00:02:47,100 --> 00:02:51,104 HI, I'M ADAM FISHER. I'M A SENIOR OVER AT THE HIGH SCHOOL. 8 00:02:51,104 --> 00:02:53,106 GO HOGS! 9 00:02:53,606 --> 00:02:54,991 I KNOW THIS IS A BIT EARLY TO ASK YOU THIS, 10 00:02:54,991 --> 00:02:57,977 SINCE THIS IS THE FIRST TIME WE MET AND ALL, 11 00:02:57,977 --> 00:03:03,249 BUT IT'S REAL IMPORTANT TO ME TO BE THE KIND OF GUY THAT GOD WANTS ME TO BE. 12 00:03:03,249 --> 00:03:07,820 YOU SEE, THE ONE THING I'M REALLY STRUGGLING WITH... 13 00:03:07,820 --> 00:03:09,889 IS IF DOING IT IS SO BAD, 14 00:03:09,889 --> 00:03:13,259 WHY DID GOD MAKE IT FEEL SO GOOD? 15 00:03:19,866 --> 00:03:23,086 [ Girls Giggling ] 16 00:03:23,586 --> 00:03:25,588 HEY, HOW'S IT GOING? 17 00:03:26,089 --> 00:03:28,391 UM, LADIES, 18 00:03:29,776 --> 00:03:32,095 MAYBE YOU SHOULD STOP BY THE NEW MEMBERS' RECEPTION... 19 00:03:32,095 --> 00:03:34,464 AT REVEREND LEMKO'S OFFICE. 20 00:03:34,464 --> 00:03:39,152 HE KIND OF REFERRED ME TO YOU, SINCE, LIKE, YOU'RE THE YOUTH PASTOR AND ALL. 21 00:03:41,054 --> 00:03:42,555 LADIES, PLEASE. 22 00:03:49,429 --> 00:03:51,931 WHERE YOU GIRLS GOING? 23 00:03:53,600 --> 00:03:56,469 MAYBE YOU SHOULD TRY THE CHURCH DOWN THE STREET. 24 00:03:56,469 --> 00:03:58,238 WEDNESDAY NIGHT, 8:00. 25 00:03:58,238 --> 00:04:02,442 CHURCH AT NIGHT? COOL. 26 00:04:04,444 --> 00:04:05,845 HEY, COULD I BRING A DATE? 27 00:04:05,845 --> 00:04:09,215 [ Girl Narrating ] OKAY, SO ADAM WAS AT AN IMPASSE ABOUT SEX, 28 00:04:09,215 --> 00:04:10,883 BUT I COMPLETELY UNDERSTOOD. 29 00:04:10,883 --> 00:04:12,819 COULD I BRING TWO DATES? 30 00:04:14,220 --> 00:04:17,223 [ Girl ] ALL HIS FRIENDS WERE HAVING A LOT OF SEX. 31 00:04:17,223 --> 00:04:20,226 APPARENTLY, THAT'S WHAT HIGH SCHOOL WAS INVENTED FOR. 32 00:04:20,226 --> 00:04:24,697 BUT EVERYONE KNOWS THAT SEX ISN'T ANY FUN WHEN YOU'RE NOT MARRIED. 33 00:04:25,198 --> 00:04:29,702 YOU NEED A LIFELONG COMMITMENT SO THAT THERE'S REAL INTIMACY. 34 00:04:29,702 --> 00:04:31,704 THAT'S WHAT MY FATHER SAYS. 35 00:04:44,851 --> 00:04:49,305 YOU SEE, I'M SMART. I'M WAITING UNTIL WE'RE MARRIED TO GIVE MYSELF TO ADAM. 36 00:04:49,305 --> 00:04:53,810 AND DESPITE THE LARGE AMOUNT OF SEX THAT OCCURS IN HIGH SCHOOL, 37 00:04:54,310 --> 00:04:57,814 I KNEW I WAS MAKING THE RIGHT CHOICE. 38 00:04:57,814 --> 00:05:02,251 THEY DON'T LOOK LIKE THEY'RE HAVING ANY FUN AT ALL. 39 00:05:20,536 --> 00:05:22,772 [ Moaning ] 40 00:05:22,772 --> 00:05:25,224 [ Squeaking ] 41 00:05:34,650 --> 00:05:37,153 [ Girl ] OKAY! ENOUGH! 42 00:05:39,589 --> 00:05:44,093 ADAM UNDERSTOOD EXACTLY HOW I FELT ABOUT THIS. 43 00:05:44,093 --> 00:05:47,096 HE LOVED THAT I WAS PURE AND VIRGINAL. 44 00:05:47,597 --> 00:05:50,600 MY STOCK VALUE WAS VERY, VERY HIGH AT OUR SCHOOL. 45 00:05:50,600 --> 00:05:52,602 WE WERE THE MOST POPULAR SENIORS. 46 00:05:53,102 --> 00:05:54,604 AND ALSO VERY IN LOVE. 47 00:06:01,611 --> 00:06:06,115 AND YOU GOT TO ADMIT, WE DO LOOK GOOD TOGETHER. 48 00:06:12,922 --> 00:06:15,375 YEAH, THAT'S ME, AMBER. 49 00:06:15,875 --> 00:06:17,877 THE FUTURE MRS. ADAM. 50 00:06:17,877 --> 00:06:23,349 WE WERE THE BEST LOOKING, BEST DRESSED, MOST POPULAR STUDENTS IN SCHOOL. 51 00:06:23,349 --> 00:06:25,351 WE'D BEEN GOING STEADY SINCE THE TENTH GRADE, 52 00:06:25,351 --> 00:06:30,857 AND EXCEPT FOR ADAM'S OCCASIONAL FLIRTING, WE'VE NEVER HAD ANY PROBLEMS. 53 00:06:30,857 --> 00:06:34,343 I'M NOT TRYING TO BRAG, BUT EVERYBODY LOVED US. 54 00:06:34,343 --> 00:06:36,846 LIFE WAS PERFECT. 55 00:06:43,352 --> 00:06:48,357 THEN ONE DARK FALL AFTERNOON AT THE LOCAL LITTLE CHICKEN, 56 00:06:48,357 --> 00:06:53,329 MY POOR BOYFRIEND WAS TRICKED INTO RUINING IT ALL. 57 00:06:53,830 --> 00:06:55,331 I KNEW HE COULDN'T HELP IT. 58 00:06:55,331 --> 00:06:56,833 HE WAS A VICTIM, REALLY. 59 00:06:57,333 --> 00:07:01,838 SHE LIVED IN A TRAILER. SHE KNEW HOW TO CONFUSE HIS YOUNG MIND. 60 00:07:12,682 --> 00:07:14,183 I MEAN, LOOK AT HER. 61 00:07:14,684 --> 00:07:18,187 [ Pop ] I'D ALMOST DO HER. 62 00:07:18,187 --> 00:07:21,407 MOST GIRLS WOULD DUMP THEIR BOYFRIENDS FOR SOMETHING LIKE THIS, 63 00:07:21,407 --> 00:07:26,412 BUT I KNEW THAT HE WAS WEAK AND JUST COULDN'T HELP IT. 64 00:07:26,913 --> 00:07:30,533 [ MOANING ] 65 00:07:36,906 --> 00:07:39,842 OH, BABY! OH, YES! OHH! 66 00:07:39,842 --> 00:07:44,197 [ Gasping And Moaning ] 67 00:07:44,597 --> 00:07:47,467 YEAH! YEAH! YEAH! YEAH! 68 00:07:52,939 --> 00:07:54,941 CHOCOLATE SUNDAE, EXTRA CREAM. 69 00:08:05,801 --> 00:08:08,738 WELL? DID YOU DO HER, BRO? 70 00:08:09,222 --> 00:08:10,690 YOU KNOW I DON'T HUMP AND TELL. 71 00:08:10,690 --> 00:08:12,675 OH, MY GOD, YOU DID HER. 72 00:08:14,677 --> 00:08:16,679 DON'T TELL ANYBODY, OKAY? 73 00:08:16,679 --> 00:08:19,682 AMBER WOULD BE PISSED OFF IF SHE FOUND OUT. 74 00:08:19,682 --> 00:08:22,185 DUDE, WE WON'T TELL A SOUL. 75 00:08:22,685 --> 00:08:26,689 WE WON'T SAY A THING. NOT A WORD. 76 00:08:26,689 --> 00:08:30,610 DUDE, HE DID HER IN THE BATHROOM AT THE DINER. 77 00:08:30,610 --> 00:08:31,611 I MEAN, SHE WAS LIKE-- 78 00:08:31,611 --> 00:08:33,513 TOTALLY HOT. 79 00:08:33,513 --> 00:08:34,997 I THINK SHE'S A SOPHOMORE. 80 00:08:34,997 --> 00:08:39,418 COME ON, DUDE, PUSH! THIS IS GONNA BE HIS GREATEST BIRTHDAY EVER. 81 00:08:41,420 --> 00:08:44,423 WE'RE GONNA GET SO RIPPED! [ Laughing ] 82 00:08:44,423 --> 00:08:46,876 DID YOU HERE ABOUT ADAM AND THAT SOPHOMORE SLUT? 83 00:08:46,876 --> 00:08:48,294 OH, I KNOW. 84 00:08:48,294 --> 00:08:50,746 I CAN'T BELIEVE HE'S DOING THIS TO AMBER. 85 00:08:50,746 --> 00:08:52,248 DOES AMBER HAVE A CLUE WHAT'S GOING ON? 86 00:08:52,248 --> 00:08:54,250 I DON'T THINK SO. POOR AMBER. 87 00:08:54,750 --> 00:08:55,685 POOR AMBER. 88 00:08:55,685 --> 00:08:56,619 POOR AMBER. 89 00:08:57,119 --> 00:08:58,054 POOR... POOR... 90 00:08:58,054 --> 00:08:58,988 HELLO! AMBER! 91 00:09:03,859 --> 00:09:06,279 UH, SURPRISE! SURPRISE! 92 00:09:06,279 --> 00:09:09,148 [ Cheering ] 93 00:09:09,148 --> 00:09:11,150 FOR ME? HAPPY BIRTHDAY! 94 00:09:11,150 --> 00:09:12,652 HEY, BIG GUY! YOU'RE EIGHTEEN! 95 00:09:12,652 --> 00:09:15,154 OH, THANKS, MAN. YOU'RE THE BEST! 96 00:09:15,154 --> 00:09:19,609 HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BRO! HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MAN! 97 00:09:19,609 --> 00:09:20,610 SURPRISE! 98 00:09:44,684 --> 00:09:46,669 HI! 99 00:10:00,616 --> 00:10:02,618 [ Amber Narrating ] BUT AS CUTE AS HE IS, 100 00:10:02,618 --> 00:10:06,622 I'VE ALWAYS BEEN ABLE TO CONTROL MY OWN SEXUAL IMPULSES. 101 00:10:06,622 --> 00:10:10,626 NO MATTER HOW HARD HE TRIED, 102 00:10:10,626 --> 00:10:12,628 I HELD MY GROUND. 103 00:10:27,143 --> 00:10:31,914 ADAM AND GINGER CONTINUED TO SEE EACH OTHER BEHIND MY BACK. 104 00:10:32,915 --> 00:10:34,917 SO, AMBER, ARE YOU GONNA GIVE ADAM... 105 00:10:35,418 --> 00:10:38,838 SOMETHING EXTRA SPECIAL FOR HIS BIRTHDAY? 106 00:10:38,838 --> 00:10:41,340 WELL, I'M DEFINITELY GOING TO TEASE HIM A LITTLE BIT. 107 00:10:41,340 --> 00:10:43,342 WHAT DO YOU MEAN, "TEASE HIM"? 108 00:10:44,727 --> 00:10:47,229 UM, IT'S WHAT I ALWAYS DO. 109 00:10:47,229 --> 00:10:51,117 IT'S CALLED "EXERCISING MY WOMANLY WAYS." 110 00:10:51,117 --> 00:10:54,987 [ Amber Narrating ] I FELT SAFE KNOWING THAT ADAM LOVED ME AND WOULD ALWAYS BE MINE, 111 00:10:54,987 --> 00:10:59,408 UNAWARE THAT GINGER WAS SUCKING HIM INTO A LUSTFUL ABYSS. 112 00:10:59,408 --> 00:11:04,313 AS AGONIZING AS IT WAS FOR ADAM, IT COULDN'T LAST. 113 00:11:04,313 --> 00:11:08,701 BESIDES, GINGER ALREADY HAD A STEADY BOYFRIEND, 114 00:11:08,701 --> 00:11:12,204 AND HE WAS SCHEDULED FOR PAROLE IN A FEW SHORT MONTHS. 115 00:11:12,204 --> 00:11:15,107 ?? I GOT A BOYFRIEND ?? 116 00:11:15,558 --> 00:11:17,927 ?? HE'S A BAD BOY ?? 117 00:11:17,927 --> 00:11:21,364 ?? HE'S MY FAVORITE ?? 118 00:11:21,864 --> 00:11:25,317 ?? HE'S MY JOY ?? 119 00:11:25,317 --> 00:11:27,303 ?? I GOT A BOYFRIEND ?? 120 00:11:27,803 --> 00:11:30,256 ?? DANGER BOY ?? 121 00:11:30,256 --> 00:11:33,159 [ Amber Narrating ] I DON'T KNOW WHY I'M SHOWING YOU THIS SCENE RIGHT NOW, 122 00:11:33,159 --> 00:11:37,046 BUT I BET IF YOUR A BOY, YOU'RE PAYING ATTENTION NOW. 123 00:11:37,046 --> 00:11:39,498 REALLY CLOSE ATTENTION. 124 00:12:01,137 --> 00:12:07,610 "AND I CAN'T WAIT TILL WE'RE TOGETHER AT LAST, ONCE MORE. 125 00:12:08,110 --> 00:12:10,613 "BEING APART IS SO PAINFUL. 126 00:12:10,613 --> 00:12:14,533 P.S. I REALLY MISS YOUR HUGE TOOL." 127 00:12:14,533 --> 00:12:17,470 [ Laughing ] ISN'T SHE THE SWEETEST THING? 128 00:12:17,870 --> 00:12:20,639 DEFINITELY A KEEPER. OH! 129 00:12:20,639 --> 00:12:26,011 [ Amber ] OH, BUT GINGER AND ADAM WOULD SOON PAY THE PRICE FOR THEIR SINS. 130 00:12:27,012 --> 00:12:30,015 [ Train Whistle Blaring ] 131 00:12:32,518 --> 00:12:35,521 C'MON, C'MON, C'MON! 132 00:12:35,521 --> 00:12:38,524 THIRTY MORE SECONDS. [ Woman ] WHAT ARE YOU TWO DOING? 133 00:12:39,024 --> 00:12:40,526 OH, NOTHING, MOM. 134 00:12:40,526 --> 00:12:45,030 WELL, THEN GET YOUR LAZY ASSES OUT TO THE FREAKIN' STORE AND PICK ME UP CIGARETTES. 135 00:12:45,030 --> 00:12:46,532 SURE, OKAY. 136 00:12:46,532 --> 00:12:48,033 JUST DO IT NOW! 137 00:12:48,033 --> 00:12:50,469 C'MON! [ Mother ] MENTHOL! 138 00:12:50,469 --> 00:12:52,922 IT'S BLUE! 139 00:12:52,922 --> 00:12:55,925 BLUE MEANS I'M PREGNANT, YOU DUMB ASS! 140 00:12:58,861 --> 00:13:00,362 IT'S BLUE. 141 00:13:01,864 --> 00:13:03,866 DAMN! [ Kicks Wall ] 142 00:13:09,872 --> 00:13:11,373 OOPS! 143 00:13:12,374 --> 00:13:15,327 LOOK, MAYBE IT WAS SOMETHING YOU ATE. YOU THINK? 144 00:13:15,327 --> 00:13:18,330 YEAH, LIKE BAD CORN OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT. 145 00:13:18,330 --> 00:13:21,834 NO, BECAUSE I DIDN'T EAT ANYTHING TODAY. WHAT'RE WE GOING TO DO? 146 00:13:21,834 --> 00:13:23,836 CAN'T WE GET RID OF IT? 147 00:13:23,836 --> 00:13:25,838 SURE, IF WE HAD 400 BUCKS. 148 00:13:25,838 --> 00:13:28,841 400? THERE MUST BE SOME KIND OF HOME KIT. 149 00:13:28,841 --> 00:13:30,342 NO, I DON'T THINK SO. 150 00:13:30,843 --> 00:13:32,845 C'MON. HOW HARD CAN IT BE? 151 00:13:36,282 --> 00:13:39,718 [ Croaking ] 152 00:13:52,948 --> 00:13:55,451 MMM. KIND OF TANGY. 153 00:13:55,451 --> 00:13:57,453 YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO LIKE IT. 154 00:13:57,453 --> 00:13:59,455 WELL, IAMPREGNANT. 155 00:13:59,455 --> 00:14:03,943 DO YOU FEEL ANYTHING? WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO FEEL? 156 00:14:04,343 --> 00:14:06,278 I DON'T KNOW. SOMETHING DROPPING. 157 00:14:06,278 --> 00:14:08,447 I DON'T THINK SO. AW, DAMN! 158 00:14:13,352 --> 00:14:17,840 MAYBE IF YOU PUNCHED ME IN THE STOMACH OR THREW ME DOWN A FLIGHT OF STAIRS. 159 00:14:17,840 --> 00:14:22,328 WELL, MY MOM WOULD GET MAD IF YOU MARKED UP THE WALLS AND STUFF. 160 00:14:22,328 --> 00:14:24,830 C'MON, LET'S KEEP TRYING. 161 00:14:40,646 --> 00:14:42,648 [ Crashing, Splashing ] 162 00:14:46,101 --> 00:14:47,603 [ Amber ] WHEN ALL THEIR OPTIONS RAN OUT, 163 00:14:48,103 --> 00:14:51,523 ADAM DECIDED TO DO THE RIGHT THING AND TELL HIS UNDERSTANDING PARENTS. 164 00:14:52,024 --> 00:14:57,029 SO, GINGER, IT'S ALWAYS NICE TO MEET A NEW FRIEND OF ADAM'S. 165 00:14:57,029 --> 00:14:59,531 ACTUALLY, WE'RE MORE THAN JUST FRIENDS. 166 00:14:59,531 --> 00:15:03,402 ADAM, AREN'T YOU AND AMBER STILL GOING STEADY? 167 00:15:03,402 --> 00:15:08,407 OH, YEAH, SURE, BUT GINGER AND I AREN'T GOING OUT. 168 00:15:08,407 --> 00:15:09,842 WE'RE JUST DOING IT. 169 00:15:13,145 --> 00:15:17,583 YOU DO REALIZE THIS ISN'T VERY CHRIST-LIKE BEHAVIOR. 170 00:15:17,583 --> 00:15:21,003 JESUS WOULD DEFINITELY NOT APPROVE. 171 00:15:21,003 --> 00:15:22,688 HONEY, I DON'T MEAN TO BE HARD ON YOU, 172 00:15:23,088 --> 00:15:25,491 BUT JESUS WAS AGAINST SEX FOR PLEASURE. 173 00:15:25,491 --> 00:15:28,394 EXCEPT IN THE MOVIE I SAW ON CABLE WITH DAVID BOWIE, 174 00:15:28,394 --> 00:15:30,396 WHERE JESUS SLEPT WITH THIS CHICK. 175 00:15:30,396 --> 00:15:32,331 LUCKY BASTARD. 176 00:15:33,766 --> 00:15:36,769 I CAN'T BELIEVE YOUR MOTHER LETS YOU WATCH SUCH FILTH. 177 00:15:37,219 --> 00:15:39,688 ACTUALLY, MY MOM DOESN'T REALLY CARE WHAT I DO, 178 00:15:39,688 --> 00:15:42,191 ALTHOUGH MY BEING KNOCKED-UP MIGHT GET A RISE OUT OF HER. 179 00:15:42,191 --> 00:15:43,626 WHAT? 180 00:15:45,794 --> 00:15:48,230 OH, I'M PREGNANT. YOU KNOW, LIKE MARY WAS WITH JESUS, 181 00:15:48,230 --> 00:15:50,616 EXCEPT I KNOW WHO THE FATHER IS. 182 00:15:52,968 --> 00:15:55,404 DEAR LORD! 183 00:16:01,844 --> 00:16:03,846 JEEZ, HONEY, ARE YOU OKAY? MOM? 184 00:16:05,848 --> 00:16:09,852 YES. I JUST NEED A LITTLE AIR. 185 00:16:13,355 --> 00:16:15,858 LOOK, MOM, DAD, 186 00:16:16,358 --> 00:16:20,863 I KNOW THIS MIGHT NOT BE THE BEST TIMING, BUT CAN I HAVE $400? 187 00:16:20,863 --> 00:16:23,866 FOUR HUNDRED DOLLARS? WHAT IN THE WORLD FOR? 188 00:16:23,866 --> 00:16:29,321 WELL, GINGER AND I, WE WANTED TO TAKE CARE OF THE BABY. 189 00:16:29,321 --> 00:16:32,257 HONEY, I DON'T MEAN TO BURST YOUR BUBBLE, 190 00:16:32,257 --> 00:16:36,762 BUT IT'S GOING TO TAKE A LOT MORE THAN $400 TO TAKE CARE OF THE BABY. 191 00:16:36,762 --> 00:16:39,665 WELL, HOW MUCH IS IT GOING TO COST THEN? 192 00:16:39,665 --> 00:16:42,568 THERE ARE SO MANY THINGS TO CONSIDER: 193 00:16:42,568 --> 00:16:45,070 FOOD, CLOTHING, DIAPERS. 194 00:16:45,571 --> 00:16:48,524 WE WERE THINKING IT WOULD BE CHEAPER IF WE DIDN'T-- 195 00:16:49,024 --> 00:16:52,411 OH, GINGER, DON'T YOU WORRY ABOUT THE COST. 196 00:16:52,411 --> 00:16:56,415 ADAM'S FATHER AND I WILL DO WHATEVER WE CAN TO HELP. 197 00:16:56,415 --> 00:16:59,418 A BABY IS A GIFT FROM GOD. 198 00:16:59,418 --> 00:17:01,887 A BUNDLE OF PURE JOY. 199 00:17:02,388 --> 00:17:04,757 EVEN IF IT IS A BASTARD. 200 00:17:05,207 --> 00:17:09,645 AND I'M SURE YOUR PARENTS WILL FEEL THE SAME WAY, WON'T THEY, HONEY? 201 00:17:12,648 --> 00:17:17,152 [ Man And Woman Arguing ] 202 00:17:25,160 --> 00:17:27,346 MAYBE YOUR MOTHER WILL BE HAPPY TO HEAR THE NEWS. 203 00:17:27,346 --> 00:17:29,715 YEAH, RIGHT. YOU DON'T KNOW MY MOM. 204 00:17:30,165 --> 00:17:33,135 SHE'S A COMPLETE PSYCHO. 205 00:17:33,619 --> 00:17:35,888 WHAT ABOUT YOUR STEPDAD? 206 00:17:35,888 --> 00:17:38,624 HE'S QUEER. 207 00:17:38,624 --> 00:17:40,109 NO WAY! 208 00:17:40,109 --> 00:17:42,027 WAY. 209 00:17:42,027 --> 00:17:44,530 HE LIVES IN QUEENS WITH HIS BOYFRIEND. 210 00:17:44,530 --> 00:17:45,998 WOW! 211 00:17:46,498 --> 00:17:49,234 THEY HAVE THEIR OWN CITY AND EVERYTHING? 212 00:17:49,234 --> 00:17:51,036 SHE'S GONNA BE SO PISSED. 213 00:17:51,036 --> 00:17:56,508 LOOK, YOU SAW HOW WELL MY PARENTS TOOK IT. I MEAN-- 214 00:17:56,942 --> 00:17:59,478 MAYBE YOUR MOTHER WILL TAKE IT BETTER THAN YOU THINK. 215 00:17:59,912 --> 00:18:00,846 YOU'RE WHAT? 216 00:18:00,846 --> 00:18:02,831 I'M PREGNANT. 217 00:18:02,831 --> 00:18:06,385 WELL, YOU GOOD FOR NOTHING, 218 00:18:06,885 --> 00:18:12,391 LEG SPREADING, OVER-OVULATING LITTLE SLUT! 219 00:18:12,391 --> 00:18:13,826 I HATE YOU. 220 00:18:13,826 --> 00:18:14,777 WHORE! 221 00:18:15,277 --> 00:18:16,779 BITCH! 222 00:18:17,262 --> 00:18:19,214 I'M GONNA KILL YOU. 223 00:18:19,715 --> 00:18:21,150 LET'S GO! 224 00:18:21,150 --> 00:18:23,585 HELL-BOUND HUSSY! 225 00:18:24,536 --> 00:18:26,538 I'M GONNA GUT YOU LIKE A FISH, 226 00:18:26,538 --> 00:18:29,424 AND WEAVE YOUR INTESTINES INTO MACRAME! 227 00:18:32,778 --> 00:18:35,197 SHE'S CRAZY. WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO NOW? 228 00:18:35,197 --> 00:18:38,133 I DON'T KNOW. YOU'RE THE MAN. AREN'T YOU GONNA DO SOMETHING BRAVE? 229 00:18:38,133 --> 00:18:41,086 YEAH, YEAH! 230 00:18:41,086 --> 00:18:45,424 [ Mother ] I'M GONNA GET YOU, YOU WHORE. 231 00:18:45,424 --> 00:18:47,392 YOU-- 232 00:18:47,392 --> 00:18:51,280 YOU MOLESTING SON OF A-- 233 00:18:51,280 --> 00:18:54,116 GET AWAY FROM-- 234 00:18:54,116 --> 00:18:58,353 GET OF MY HOUSE, YOU LITTLE LUSTY SCUMBAG! 235 00:18:58,854 --> 00:19:01,607 YOU WHORE! 236 00:19:01,607 --> 00:19:04,409 YOU LITTLE HELL-BOUND HUSSY! 237 00:19:18,757 --> 00:19:21,710 [ Screaming ] 238 00:19:21,710 --> 00:19:25,164 LET ME GO! GET AWAY FROM ME! 239 00:19:25,164 --> 00:19:28,167 SHE'S MY FRIGGIN' DAUGHTER! I CAN KILL HER IF I WANT TO! 240 00:19:28,167 --> 00:19:29,668 I MADE HER! 241 00:19:29,668 --> 00:19:32,171 YOU! YOU IMPREGNATING MOLESTER. 242 00:19:32,171 --> 00:19:34,673 YOU OUGHT TO BE ARRESTING HIM. 243 00:19:34,673 --> 00:19:38,177 HE KNOCKED UP MY BABY! 244 00:19:40,179 --> 00:19:42,181 IT'S A GOOD THING YOUR NEIGHBOR HEARD YOU AND CALLED US. 245 00:19:42,181 --> 00:19:44,683 OH, GOD. THIS TIME WAS THE WORST. I REALLY THOUGHT WE WERE GONERS. 246 00:19:44,683 --> 00:19:46,685 IT MUST HAVE BEEN PRETTY SCARY FOR YOU KIDS, HUH? 247 00:19:47,186 --> 00:19:50,189 YEAH, IT WAS A GOOD THING I WAS THERE TO PROTECT HER. RIGHT. 248 00:19:50,189 --> 00:19:51,690 ARE WE FREE TO GO NOW, OFFICER? 249 00:19:51,690 --> 00:19:54,626 ACTUALLY, WE NEED THIS LITTLE LADY TO COME DOWN, SPEAK TO SOCIAL SERVICES. 250 00:19:54,626 --> 00:19:56,461 DO I HAVE TO? 251 00:19:56,461 --> 00:19:59,965 WE NEED TO GET YOU CHECKED OUT, MISS, FOR THE BABY AND ALL. 252 00:19:59,965 --> 00:20:01,967 SO HOW FAR ALONG ARE YOU? 253 00:20:01,967 --> 00:20:03,468 HUH? 254 00:20:03,468 --> 00:20:04,903 YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHEN THE BABY WAS CONCEIVED? 255 00:20:08,907 --> 00:20:11,843 WHEN DID YOU KNOCK HER UP? 256 00:20:11,843 --> 00:20:14,346 OH. WELL, I'M NOT SURE, REALLY. 257 00:20:14,346 --> 00:20:17,216 MAYBE IT WAS THAT FIRST TIME WE DID IT BACK AT THE LITTLE CHICKEN. 258 00:20:17,216 --> 00:20:21,670 - OR AT YOUR BIRTHDAY PARTY. - YOUR BIRTHDAY PARTY? 259 00:20:21,670 --> 00:20:26,508 YEAH. THE BIG ONE-EIGHT. NOW I'M OLD ENOUGH TO GET DRUNK IN CANADA. 260 00:20:27,009 --> 00:20:29,978 SO YOU THINK IT'S ONE OF THOSE TWO OCCASIONS, HUH? 261 00:20:30,462 --> 00:20:31,930 MAYBE IT WAS THAT TIME WHEN WE DID IT IN THE MALL. 262 00:20:31,930 --> 00:20:33,932 OR WHEN ROCKY LET US USE HIS PARENTS' HOT TUB. 263 00:20:33,932 --> 00:20:37,419 OR THAT TIME WHEN WE WERE IN THE BACK ROW OF THE MOVIE THEATER. 264 00:20:37,419 --> 00:20:41,857 - [ Mother Shouting ] - ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT! 265 00:20:41,857 --> 00:20:43,358 WE'D BETTER GET GOING. 266 00:20:43,358 --> 00:20:48,830 WAIT. WILL YOU COME DOWN WITH ME, PLEASE? 267 00:20:48,830 --> 00:20:52,834 I'LL-- YOU IN THE COP CAR. 268 00:20:52,834 --> 00:20:54,836 I'LL TAKE A RAIN CHECK. 269 00:20:56,838 --> 00:21:00,192 [ Mother ] GET HIM IN HERE! I WANT TO KILL HIM! 270 00:21:04,579 --> 00:21:07,082 [ Amber ] GINGER'S MOTHER CONTINUED TO BE UNREASONABLE... 271 00:21:07,082 --> 00:21:10,152 SO ADAM WAS QUICK TO LEND A HELPING HAND. 272 00:21:10,652 --> 00:21:13,155 HERE WE ARE. 273 00:21:13,155 --> 00:21:16,658 IT'S NO PROBLEM, HONEY. YOU STAY WITH US UNTIL THINGS CALM DOWN AT HOME. 274 00:21:17,159 --> 00:21:19,077 JUST TRY NOT TO STEAL ANYTHING. 275 00:21:19,077 --> 00:21:21,079 THAT'S VERY NICE OF YOU, MRS. FISHER. 276 00:21:21,079 --> 00:21:25,317 WELL, AFTER ALL, YOU ARE CARRYING OUR FIRST ILLEGITIMATE GRANDCHILD. 277 00:21:25,317 --> 00:21:27,786 THAT MAKES YOU ONE OF THE FAMILY NOW. 278 00:21:29,288 --> 00:21:30,989 [ Amber ] HEARTWARMING, ISN'T IT? 279 00:21:30,989 --> 00:21:33,792 A TOTAL MOMENT FOR THE FAMILY ALBUM. 280 00:21:38,196 --> 00:21:41,116 [ School Bell Ringing ] 281 00:21:41,616 --> 00:21:45,103 [ Amber ] ADAM WOULD SOON SUFFER THE FULL CONSEQUENCES OF HIS ACTIONS. 282 00:21:45,604 --> 00:21:48,106 BUT FOR NOW, HE REMAINED BLISSFULLY IGNORANT, 283 00:21:48,106 --> 00:21:50,342 AS YOU CAN SEE BY THIS DREAM SEQUENCE. 284 00:21:50,742 --> 00:21:53,628 ???? [ Pop ] 285 00:21:53,628 --> 00:21:57,582 [ Amber ] BABY, HIT HER ONE MORE TIME. PLEASE. 286 00:21:57,582 --> 00:22:00,535 ???? [ Continues ] 287 00:22:00,535 --> 00:22:02,487 ?? DO YOU THINK ABOUT US ?? 288 00:22:02,487 --> 00:22:04,406 ?? AND MAKIN' LOVE ?? 289 00:22:04,406 --> 00:22:06,808 ?? DO YOU WANNA GET WITH ME WITH ME ?? 290 00:22:06,808 --> 00:22:09,211 ? ?? WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT ME ? 291 00:22:13,598 --> 00:22:15,550 ? ?? WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT ME ? 292 00:22:20,806 --> 00:22:23,208 ? ?? WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT ME ? 293 00:22:23,208 --> 00:22:25,077 ?? DO YOU THINK ABOUT US ?? 294 00:22:25,577 --> 00:22:26,962 ?? FALLING IN LOVE ?? 295 00:22:26,962 --> 00:22:28,397 ?? DO YOU WANNA GET WITH ME WITH ME ?? 296 00:22:28,397 --> 00:22:30,332 ? ?? WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT ME ? 297 00:22:30,332 --> 00:22:32,284 ?? DO YOU THINK ABOUT US ?? 298 00:22:32,284 --> 00:22:34,236 ?? AND MAKIN' LOVE ?? 299 00:22:34,236 --> 00:22:35,737 ?? DO YOU WANNA GET WITH ME WITH ME ?? 300 00:22:35,737 --> 00:22:38,690 ? ?? WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT ME ? 301 00:22:38,690 --> 00:22:40,642 ?? DO YOU THINK ABOUT US ?? 302 00:22:40,642 --> 00:22:43,545 ?? YOU WANNA GET WITH ME ?? 303 00:22:43,545 --> 00:22:45,981 ?? TELL ME, TELL ME AM I ON YOUR MIND ?? 304 00:22:45,981 --> 00:22:48,383 ?? ALL OF THE TIME ?? 305 00:22:48,383 --> 00:22:51,837 ? ?? LET ME KNOW, LET ME KNOW LET ME KNOW, LET ME KNOW ? 306 00:22:51,837 --> 00:22:55,824 ???? [ Continues ] 307 00:23:03,732 --> 00:23:06,618 ? ?? IF YOU WANNA BE MY MAN THEN TAKE ME BY THE HAND ? 308 00:23:06,618 --> 00:23:10,572 ?? ALL DAY ALL I WANNA DO IS SPEND TIME WITH YOU ?? 309 00:23:10,572 --> 00:23:14,493 ?? ALL NIGHT I KNOW YOU WANNA GET WITH ME TOO ?? 310 00:23:14,493 --> 00:23:17,979 ?? DO YOU THINK ABOUT ME THE WAY THAT I THINK ABOUT YOU ?? 311 00:23:17,979 --> 00:23:21,416 ?? YOU TREAT ME RIGHT LIKE NOBODY ELSE CAN DO ?? 312 00:23:21,416 --> 00:23:23,769 ? ?? WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT ME ? 313 00:23:28,607 --> 00:23:31,560 ? ?? WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT ME ? 314 00:23:36,047 --> 00:23:38,517 ? ?? WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT ME ? 315 00:23:38,517 --> 00:23:40,452 ?? DO YOU THINK ABOUT US ?? 316 00:23:43,455 --> 00:23:45,390 ? ?? WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT ME ? 317 00:23:45,891 --> 00:23:46,842 ?? DO YOU THINK ABOUT US ?? 318 00:23:51,213 --> 00:23:53,198 ? ?? WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT ME ? 319 00:23:53,198 --> 00:23:54,699 ?? DO YOU THINK ABOUT US ?? 320 00:23:54,699 --> 00:23:57,202 [ Woman On P.A. ] ADAM FISHER? 321 00:23:57,202 --> 00:23:59,704 ADAM FISHER? 322 00:23:59,704 --> 00:24:02,607 ADAM FISHER, PLEASE COME TO THE PRINCIPAL'S OFFICE. 323 00:24:02,607 --> 00:24:04,593 ADAM FISHER. 324 00:24:04,593 --> 00:24:06,094 WHAT'D YOU DO THIS TIME, ADAM? 325 00:24:06,094 --> 00:24:08,597 [ Amber ] JUST WHEN THE FISHERS THOUGHT THAT THE ONLY THING THEY HAD TO WORRY ABOUT... 326 00:24:08,597 --> 00:24:12,100 WAS SOME MISSING FLATWARE, WHOO! ADAM'S IN TROUBLE. 327 00:24:12,100 --> 00:24:14,603 THINGS TOOK A DISASTROUS TURN. 328 00:24:14,603 --> 00:24:17,606 GREAT. HERE WE GO AGAIN. 329 00:24:17,606 --> 00:24:19,057 [ Girl ] HEY, AMBER. WHAT? 330 00:24:23,995 --> 00:24:25,997 HEY, WHAT'S IT GOING TO BE THIS TIME? 331 00:24:25,997 --> 00:24:29,501 MAYBE A TONSIL INSPECTION IN THE NURSE'S OFFICE? NOT THIS TIME, ADAM. 332 00:24:29,501 --> 00:24:33,004 THIS TIME, THE PRINCIPAL ACTUALLY DOES NEED TO SEE YOU IN HIS OFFICE. 333 00:24:33,004 --> 00:24:35,507 WHY? WHAT'S UP? I DON'T KNOW. YOU TELL ME. 334 00:24:36,007 --> 00:24:40,011 SOME GUYS WENT IN THERE, AND THEN HE BUZZED ME AND ASKED ME TO CALL YOU DOWN. 335 00:24:41,947 --> 00:24:43,949 ADAM FISHER? YEAH? 336 00:24:43,949 --> 00:24:46,451 MR. FISHER, I'M DETECTIVE GRANGER FROM THE GATLIN POLICE DEPARTMENT. 337 00:24:46,952 --> 00:24:50,455 WE NEED YOU TO COME DOWN TO THE STATION WITH US. WHY? 338 00:24:50,455 --> 00:24:53,458 I'M AFRAID WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO ARREST YOU ON SUSPICION OF STATUTORY RAPE. 339 00:24:53,458 --> 00:24:56,928 DO YOU THINK I DID IT WITH A STATUE? 340 00:24:58,363 --> 00:25:01,366 MR. FISHER, YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO REMAIN SILENT, I'M INNOCENT. 341 00:25:01,366 --> 00:25:04,870 ANYTHING YOU SAY CAN AND WILL BE USED AGAINST YOU IN A COURT OF LAW. 342 00:25:04,870 --> 00:25:07,873 IF YOU CANNOT AFFORD AN ATTORNEY, ONE WILL BE PROVIDED FOR YOU. 343 00:25:07,873 --> 00:25:09,374 DO YOU UNDERSTAND YOUR RIGHTS? 344 00:25:10,825 --> 00:25:12,827 HEY, BRO, WHAT'S GOING ON? I'M NOT EXACTLY SURE. 345 00:25:12,827 --> 00:25:16,331 THEY'RE TAKING ME TO THE BIG HOUSE. YEAH? WHAT DID YOU DO? 346 00:25:16,331 --> 00:25:18,333 IT'S GOT SOMETHING TO DO WITH STATUES. 347 00:25:18,333 --> 00:25:22,337 STATUTORY RAPE. UNDERAGE SEX IS A VERY SERIOUS CRIME. 348 00:25:24,839 --> 00:25:28,793 LOOK, DO ME A FAVOR AND DON'T TELL AMBER ABOUT THE COPS AND ALL. 349 00:25:30,795 --> 00:25:33,882 HE'S SO BUSTED. 350 00:25:33,882 --> 00:25:36,201 YOU CAN GO TO JAIL FOR BANGING A SOPHOMORE? 351 00:25:39,604 --> 00:25:41,573 [ Mrs. Fisher ] HI. YOU'VE REACHED THE FISHERS'. PLEASE LEAVE A MESSAGE. 352 00:25:41,573 --> 00:25:43,975 [ Woman ] THIS IS THE OPERATOR WITH A COLLECT CALL... 353 00:25:43,975 --> 00:25:45,577 FROM THE GATLIN COUNTY JAIL FROM ADAM. 354 00:25:45,577 --> 00:25:46,778 WILL YOU ACCEPT THE CHARGES? 355 00:26:37,312 --> 00:26:41,833 ALL RIGHT, FISHER, THE LIEUTENANT WANTS TO TALK TO YOU. 356 00:26:50,058 --> 00:26:54,012 YOU CAN USE THAT PHONE TO CALL YOUR PARENTS WHILE I FINISH WITH THIS REPORT. 357 00:26:54,012 --> 00:26:55,981 MY PARENTS ARE OUT OF TOWN UNTIL TOMORROW. 358 00:26:55,981 --> 00:26:58,483 THEY'RE AT THE "UP WITH JESUS" FESTIVAL IN OHIO. 359 00:26:58,483 --> 00:27:01,953 DO YOU HAVE ANY OTHER FAMILY IN THE AREA? 360 00:27:01,953 --> 00:27:06,791 THERE'S MY GIRLFRIEND. WHY DON'T YOU GIVE HER A CALL THEN? 361 00:27:06,791 --> 00:27:08,576 WELL, I DON'T KNOW. SHE'S KIND OF MOODY. 362 00:27:08,576 --> 00:27:11,930 LISTEN, I'M GOING TO HAVE TO PUT YOU IN THE LOCKUP THEN. 363 00:27:11,930 --> 00:27:14,265 IT'S UP TO YOU. [ Man ] I'M GONNA MESS YOU UP. 364 00:27:14,699 --> 00:27:17,118 I'M GONNA MESS YOU UP. I'M GONNA MESS EVERYBODY UP! 365 00:27:17,118 --> 00:27:21,923 I'M GONNA GRAB YOU BY THE EYEBALLS AND SNAP YOUR HEAD LIKE A CHICKEN! 366 00:27:27,646 --> 00:27:30,465 [ No Audible Dialogue ] 367 00:27:32,384 --> 00:27:34,836 YOU HAVE TO TALK INTO THE MICROPHONE. 368 00:27:46,681 --> 00:27:48,183 OH. 369 00:27:50,685 --> 00:27:53,171 [ Blows ] 370 00:27:53,171 --> 00:27:57,108 WELL, ANYWAYS, ADAM, WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE? 371 00:27:57,108 --> 00:27:59,110 I MEAN, I HOPE YOU'RE NOT TOUCHING ANYTHING BACK THERE. 372 00:27:59,110 --> 00:28:00,545 NO, NO, I'M NOT, AMBER. 373 00:28:00,545 --> 00:28:02,547 LOOK, IT'S ALL A MISUNDERSTANDING. 374 00:28:02,547 --> 00:28:06,251 GOOD. I SHOULD HOPE SO. I FEEL LIKE I'M IN DEAD MAN WALKINGHERE. 375 00:28:06,251 --> 00:28:08,370 WHAT DID YOU DO? 376 00:28:08,370 --> 00:28:10,288 YOU SEE-- 377 00:28:10,288 --> 00:28:12,957 I SORT OF SAW THIS GIRL A COUPLE OF TIMES. 378 00:28:12,957 --> 00:28:16,094 WHAT? AND FOR SOME REASON, 379 00:28:16,094 --> 00:28:18,546 BECAUSE I'M 18 NOW, AND SHE'S STILL 15-- 380 00:28:18,546 --> 00:28:21,516 WAIT. YOU WERE SEEING A SOPHOMORE? 381 00:28:21,516 --> 00:28:25,553 KIND OF. SEE, SHE MOVED IN WITH US THE OTHER DAY... 382 00:28:25,553 --> 00:28:27,555 BECAUSE WE WERE TELLING HER-- WHAT? 383 00:28:27,555 --> 00:28:31,059 I KIND OF GOT HER PREGNANT. [ ANGRY YELLING ] 384 00:28:35,947 --> 00:28:37,832 [ Banging ] 385 00:28:41,603 --> 00:28:43,571 OW! 386 00:28:43,571 --> 00:28:46,040 YOU OKAY? 387 00:28:46,541 --> 00:28:50,478 JUST-- JUST TELL ME YOU DON'T LOVE HER. 388 00:28:50,962 --> 00:28:54,849 LOOK, I DON'T EVEN LIKE HER. I LOVE YOU. 389 00:28:54,849 --> 00:28:57,769 I NEED YOU SO BAD. 390 00:29:01,122 --> 00:29:04,876 I PROMISE I'VE LEARNED THE ERROR OF MY WICKED WAYS. 391 00:29:04,876 --> 00:29:09,614 I'VE MADE A LOT OF MISTAKES. I KNOW THAT. 392 00:29:09,614 --> 00:29:13,168 BUT RIGHT NOW, WHAT I NEED MOST IS... 393 00:29:13,585 --> 00:29:16,421 IS YOUR FORGIVENESS. 394 00:29:20,708 --> 00:29:24,529 OH, AND CAN YOU FIND MY PARENTS AND TELL THEM TO GET ME A LAWYER? 395 00:29:28,366 --> 00:29:33,371 [ Amber ] CHUCK VERY WELL COULD HAVE BEEN THE FISHERS' FIRST MISTAKE. 396 00:29:33,371 --> 00:29:36,374 WELL, SECOND. 397 00:29:54,342 --> 00:29:57,812 ADAM. I'M CHUCK CLOPPERMAN. 398 00:29:57,812 --> 00:30:00,131 HI, MR. CLOPPERMAN. 399 00:30:00,131 --> 00:30:02,584 PLEASE, CALL ME CHUCK. 400 00:30:02,584 --> 00:30:06,588 ADAM, YOUR PARENTS HAVE HIRED ME TO REPRESENT YOU IN THE MATTER AT HAND. 401 00:30:06,588 --> 00:30:10,058 I WANT YOU TO REST ASSURED THAT YOU ARE IN GOOD HANDS NOW, SON, 402 00:30:10,058 --> 00:30:12,243 AND THERE'S NOTHING TO BE WORRIED ABOUT. 403 00:30:12,243 --> 00:30:14,245 HOW MUCH LONGER WILL I HAVE TO BE IN HERE? 404 00:30:14,245 --> 00:30:16,648 THERE'S ULTIMATE FIGHTING ON PAY-PER-VIEW TONIGHT. 405 00:30:18,950 --> 00:30:20,819 WELL, FORTUNATELY FOR US THEN, 406 00:30:21,319 --> 00:30:23,721 WE WERE ABLE TO SCHEDULE YOUR ARRAIGNMENT FOR THIS AFTERNOON. 407 00:30:23,721 --> 00:30:28,076 I'M GOING TO ASK THE JUDGE TO RELEASE YOU ON YOUR OWN... RECOGNIZANCE. 408 00:30:28,076 --> 00:30:31,830 SO I'LL HAVE YOU OUT OF HERE BY 6 P.M. AT THE LATEST, PAL. 409 00:30:31,830 --> 00:30:33,331 NO PROBLEM. 410 00:30:33,331 --> 00:30:35,800 YOUR REQUEST FOR REDUCTION OF BAIL IS DENIED. 411 00:30:35,800 --> 00:30:37,802 BAIL IS SET AT $20,000. 412 00:30:45,960 --> 00:30:47,962 WELL, THAT DIDN'T GO TOO BAD. 413 00:30:47,962 --> 00:30:50,965 DIDN'T GO TOO BAD? I THOUGHT YOU SAID YOU'D GET HIM OUT ON HIS WORD. 414 00:30:50,965 --> 00:30:52,967 NOW I'VE GOT TO PUT THE HOUSE UP FOR COLLATERAL. 415 00:30:52,967 --> 00:30:56,471 AL, IT'S NOT LIKE THE KID'S GOING TO HIGHTAIL IT TO COSTA RICA, 416 00:30:56,471 --> 00:30:58,973 SO I THINK WE'RE OKAY. 417 00:30:58,973 --> 00:31:00,975 OH, ON TO OTHER IMPORTANT MATTERS. 418 00:31:01,476 --> 00:31:04,979 I WANT YOU TO COME BY MY OFFICE IN THE MORNING SO WE CAN DISCUSS P.R. STRATEGY. 419 00:31:04,979 --> 00:31:06,481 P.R.? YEAH. 420 00:31:06,981 --> 00:31:11,986 HOW WE'RE GOING TO HANDLE THE INEVITABLE THRONGS OF REPORTERS, CAMERAS, LIGHTS, 421 00:31:12,987 --> 00:31:15,990 TALK SHOW APPEARANCES. 422 00:31:15,990 --> 00:31:17,492 OH, MY. 423 00:31:28,553 --> 00:31:30,955 UH, CAN I GET YOU FOLKS ANYTHING? 424 00:31:30,955 --> 00:31:33,191 WATER? FINGER JELL-O? 425 00:31:33,191 --> 00:31:34,692 COFFEE? NO, THANK YOU. 426 00:31:34,692 --> 00:31:35,627 WHY DON'T YOU TAKE A PEN? 427 00:31:35,627 --> 00:31:37,545 TAKE A PEN. NO, COME ON, TAKE A PEN. 428 00:31:37,545 --> 00:31:39,430 WELL, JUST ONE. THANKS. 429 00:31:39,430 --> 00:31:41,349 AND I JUST LOVE YOUR WOOD PANELING. 430 00:31:41,349 --> 00:31:42,767 IT'S VERY CLASSY. 431 00:31:43,251 --> 00:31:46,254 WOOD WARMS UP THE ROOM, DON'T YOU THINK? HONEY? 432 00:31:48,756 --> 00:31:50,758 CHUCK, WE'RE KIND OF IN THE DARK HERE. 433 00:31:50,758 --> 00:31:54,262 WHAT EXACTLY ARE WE LOOKING AT? 434 00:31:54,262 --> 00:31:58,816 I'VE BEEN UP ALL NIGHT AND I THINK I'VE COME UP WITH A FAIL-PROOF STRATEGY. 435 00:31:58,816 --> 00:32:02,737 PERCEPTION. IT'S ALL ABOUT PERCEPTION. 436 00:32:02,737 --> 00:32:05,239 I MEAN, TODAY, WITH THE MEDIA OUTLETS, 437 00:32:05,239 --> 00:32:07,742 THE INTERNET, YOU KNOW, THE DISHES, ALL THAT KIND OF STUFF, 438 00:32:08,242 --> 00:32:10,244 WHAT REALLY MATTERS IS PEOPLE'S PERCEPTION. 439 00:32:10,244 --> 00:32:12,814 TAKE A LOOK AT THAT WHOLE JONBENET AFFAIR. YOU REMEMBER THAT? 440 00:32:12,814 --> 00:32:15,750 OH, BROTHER! NOW THAT'S ONE LADY... 441 00:32:15,750 --> 00:32:18,186 WHO NEEDS TO HAVE A HEART-TO-HEART WITH HER MAKER. 442 00:32:18,186 --> 00:32:23,141 LOTS OF PEOPLE THINK THAT PATSY RAMSEY DID A BAD THING. WHY? 443 00:32:23,141 --> 00:32:27,462 [ Fart ] SOMEONE CUT THE CHEESE? 444 00:32:27,462 --> 00:32:29,464 OH. THAT WAS ME. 445 00:32:29,464 --> 00:32:31,966 I'LL TELL YOU WHY. 446 00:32:31,966 --> 00:32:34,969 'CAUSE THAT WOMAN DIDN'T HAVE THE PROPER SPIN. 447 00:32:34,969 --> 00:32:37,472 I MEAN, IF THAT WOMAN HAD HAD BETTER HANDLING, HUH? 448 00:32:37,472 --> 00:32:40,475 I MEAN, EVEN IF SHE SHED A TEAR OR TWO, 449 00:32:40,475 --> 00:32:42,477 I'LL TELL YOU, WE'D BE CALLING HER A SAINT... 450 00:32:42,477 --> 00:32:45,480 AND GIVING HER HER PICK OF CROATIAN ORPHANS. 451 00:32:45,980 --> 00:32:47,732 OH. HE'S GOING TO HELL. 452 00:32:47,732 --> 00:32:51,135 THE PUBLIC IS GOING TO BELIEVE ANYTHING THAT WE TELL THEM. 453 00:32:51,602 --> 00:32:54,105 ISN'T IT GREAT? HUH? 454 00:32:54,105 --> 00:32:57,075 ISN'T THAT A SIN? 455 00:32:58,943 --> 00:33:01,879 ANYWAY, WE-- WE DIGRESS. 456 00:33:01,879 --> 00:33:04,365 THERE WE GO. WHAT'S THIS? 457 00:33:04,365 --> 00:33:07,802 THIS IS THE STRATEGY. YOU READ, DON'T YOU? 458 00:33:07,802 --> 00:33:09,303 THERE. 459 00:33:10,755 --> 00:33:14,258 WE ARE GONNA TELL EVERYONE HOW MUCH ADAM AND GINGER ARE IN LOVE. 460 00:33:14,759 --> 00:33:15,693 BUT I LOVE AMBER. 461 00:33:15,693 --> 00:33:17,178 NOT ANYMORE YOU DON'T. 462 00:33:17,178 --> 00:33:19,664 HE LOVES AMBER. SHE'S A LOVELY GIRL. 463 00:33:20,148 --> 00:33:22,617 PEOPLE, PEOPLE, TRUST ME, TRUST ME. 464 00:33:22,617 --> 00:33:24,118 WE FOLLOW MY GAME PLAN, 465 00:33:24,118 --> 00:33:28,639 NOTHING WILL GET IN THE WAY OF OUR VICTORY. 466 00:33:33,828 --> 00:33:34,829 [ Amber ] UNFORTUNATELY FOR ADAM, 467 00:33:34,829 --> 00:33:37,248 CHUCK WAS NOT THE ONLY ONE HATCHING A PLAN. 468 00:33:37,248 --> 00:33:39,751 LYDIA STONE, ASSISTANT D.A. AND WANNABE MAYOR, 469 00:33:40,251 --> 00:33:44,255 WAS ABOUT TO MAKE ADAM THE POSTER CHILD FOR HER ELECTION CAMPAIGN. 470 00:33:44,255 --> 00:33:46,257 WHAT THE HELL DO YOU EXPECT ME TO DO ABOUT IT? 471 00:33:46,257 --> 00:33:49,761 YOU'RE MY CAMPAIGN ADVISOR. ADVISE ME, YOU LITTLE MAGGOT. 472 00:33:50,261 --> 00:33:53,214 WELL, PART OF THE PROBLEM IS THAT, AS AN ASSISTANT D.A., 473 00:33:53,214 --> 00:33:56,217 YOU DON'T HAVE THE HIGHEST OF PROFILES. 474 00:33:56,217 --> 00:33:58,202 WE NEED TO FIND A WAY TO DRAW ATTENTION TO YOU, 475 00:33:58,202 --> 00:34:01,939 AND YOUR NEW LOOK JUST ISN'T CUTTING IT ANYMORE. 476 00:34:02,440 --> 00:34:03,391 WE NEED AN ISSUE. 477 00:34:03,891 --> 00:34:05,243 AN ISSUE? YES. 478 00:34:05,243 --> 00:34:08,096 WE NEED PEOPLE TO THINK THAT YOU'RE PASSIONATE ABOUT SOMETHING. 479 00:34:08,596 --> 00:34:10,515 I AM PASSIONATE ABOUT-- OTHER THAN BEING MAYOR. 480 00:34:10,515 --> 00:34:12,850 OH. I'M SURE WE'LL COME UP WITH SOMETHING. 481 00:34:12,850 --> 00:34:14,852 IT'S JUST AN ISSUE. HOW HARD CAN IT BE? 482 00:34:14,852 --> 00:34:18,289 OKAY, ISSUES. ISSUES, ISSUES, ISSUES. 483 00:34:18,790 --> 00:34:21,292 WELL, HELP ME OUT HERE. WHAT ARE SOME ISSUES? 484 00:34:21,292 --> 00:34:23,394 WELL, THIS IS AMERICA. THEY'RE ENDLESS. THERE'S GUN CONTROL. 485 00:34:23,394 --> 00:34:24,345 AGAINST IT. 486 00:34:24,345 --> 00:34:25,780 PROSTITUTION. FOR IT. 487 00:34:25,780 --> 00:34:28,116 TEENAGE PREGNANCY. OH, PLEASE! 488 00:34:28,116 --> 00:34:30,118 DON'T GET ME STARTED ON TEENAGERS. WHAT NOW? 489 00:34:30,118 --> 00:34:34,105 THERE'S ALL THESE FILES INVOLVING DELINQUENT TEENAGE CRAP. 490 00:34:34,105 --> 00:34:37,475 STATUTORY RAPE. HE'S 18, SHE'S 15 AND PREGNANT. 491 00:34:37,475 --> 00:34:38,476 THIS COULD WORK. 492 00:34:38,476 --> 00:34:39,927 WHAT? THIS IS PERFECT. 493 00:34:39,927 --> 00:34:43,347 SEX OFFENDERS. I LOVE SEX OFFENDERS! 494 00:34:43,347 --> 00:34:45,349 YOU COULD BE AGAINST THEM. OKAY. 495 00:34:45,349 --> 00:34:47,752 ARE YOU SURE THIS IS AN ISSUE PEOPLE REALLY CARE ABOUT? 496 00:34:48,252 --> 00:34:50,972 LYDIA, THIS IS THE BIBLE BELT, THEY'RE GONNA LOVE IT. 497 00:34:50,972 --> 00:34:53,224 OKAY. [ Chuckles ] 498 00:34:53,224 --> 00:34:55,226 THIS ISN'T THE BIBLE BELT, YOU MORON. 499 00:34:55,226 --> 00:34:58,029 BUT THEY DON'T KNOW THAT. NO, THEY DON'T. 500 00:34:58,429 --> 00:35:00,882 OH, I'M GONNA THROW THE BOOK AT THIS KID. 501 00:35:00,882 --> 00:35:02,884 AH! OH. YOUNG ADULT. 502 00:35:02,884 --> 00:35:04,886 THANK YOU. 503 00:35:06,370 --> 00:35:08,372 GUILTY. 504 00:35:08,372 --> 00:35:11,325 SAY IT. GUILTY! GUILTY! 505 00:35:11,325 --> 00:35:13,778 [ Amber ] WHILE LYDIA PLOTTED THE YOUNG ADULT'S FUTURE, 506 00:35:13,778 --> 00:35:16,197 ADAM MET WITH THE YOUTH PASTOR... 507 00:35:16,614 --> 00:35:20,218 TO WORK OUT THE MORE IMPORTANT ISSUES OF HIS NOW COMPLICATED LIFE. 508 00:35:20,218 --> 00:35:23,221 I KNOW WE CAN STILL DO IT, AND IT WON'T GET INTO THE BABY'S FACE, 509 00:35:23,221 --> 00:35:26,891 BUT I'M TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WHAT TO DO FROM A RELIGIOUS PERSPECTIVE. 510 00:35:34,699 --> 00:35:38,152 [ Amber ] GINGER FINALLY HAD SOME POSITIVE ROLE MODELS, 511 00:35:38,152 --> 00:35:39,654 NOT THAT IT HELPED. 512 00:35:40,154 --> 00:35:43,307 ARE YOU ON FRIGGIN' CRACK? 513 00:35:43,307 --> 00:35:45,760 GINGER, HONEY, 514 00:35:45,760 --> 00:35:48,162 WE DON'T USE LANGUAGE LIKE THAT AT THE DINNER TABLE. 515 00:35:48,162 --> 00:35:52,333 I DON'T LOVE YOU. I LOVE JOHNNY. 516 00:35:52,333 --> 00:35:53,251 YEAH, I KNOW, OKAY? I DON'T LOVE YOU EITHER. 517 00:35:53,751 --> 00:35:56,154 IT'S JUST A PERCEPTION THING FOR ALL THE STUPID PEOPLE. 518 00:35:56,154 --> 00:35:57,588 CHUCK'S SURE IT'LL GET ME OFF. 519 00:35:57,588 --> 00:36:00,858 BUT JOHNNY'S GETTING PAROLED IN A COUPLE OF MONTHS. 520 00:36:00,858 --> 00:36:02,810 GINGER, ALL WE HAVE TO DO IS LIE. 521 00:36:02,810 --> 00:36:06,164 WHOA! LYING IS A SIN, ADAM. 522 00:36:06,164 --> 00:36:07,532 WE'RE EMBELLISHING. 523 00:36:07,532 --> 00:36:10,535 SO WHETHER YOU LOVE GINGER, MARY ANN OR THE PROFESSOR, 524 00:36:10,535 --> 00:36:13,421 IT REALLY DOESN'T MATTER. 525 00:36:17,758 --> 00:36:20,761 HERE, HONEY, I KNOW HOW MUCH YOU LIKE WIENERS. 526 00:36:22,480 --> 00:36:24,398 WE'RE RUNNING OUT OF OPTIONS, HERE. 527 00:36:24,398 --> 00:36:26,901 YOU GUYS AT LEAST LIKE EACH OTHER, RIGHT? 528 00:36:26,901 --> 00:36:30,254 HMM. I NEVER REALLY EVEN THOUGHT ABOUT IT. 529 00:36:30,254 --> 00:36:33,040 I MEAN, HE JUST GIVES ME REALLY GOOD BONE. 530 00:36:35,760 --> 00:36:37,028 HONEY? 531 00:36:44,852 --> 00:36:46,854 [ Knock On Door ] 532 00:36:46,854 --> 00:36:48,356 YEAH? 533 00:36:55,429 --> 00:36:57,381 YOU KNOW, SON, I... 534 00:36:59,317 --> 00:37:03,221 I FEEL PARTIALLY RESPONSIBLE FOR WHAT'S HAPPENED. 535 00:37:03,221 --> 00:37:05,573 COOL. THANKS, DAD. 536 00:37:05,573 --> 00:37:10,294 IT'S OBVIOUS YOU KNOW ALL ABOUT THE BIRDS AND THE BEES, HUH? 537 00:37:10,294 --> 00:37:14,298 YEAH. [ Snickering ] 538 00:37:14,298 --> 00:37:17,802 BUT THERE ARE... 539 00:37:17,802 --> 00:37:19,303 ALTERNATIVES. 540 00:37:19,804 --> 00:37:21,722 WHAT DO YOU MEAN? 541 00:37:23,107 --> 00:37:25,159 IT'S CALLED... 542 00:37:25,159 --> 00:37:26,460 MASTURBATING. 543 00:37:27,812 --> 00:37:28,813 DAD... 544 00:37:28,813 --> 00:37:31,282 IT'S NOTHING TO BE EMBARRASSED ABOUT, SON. 545 00:37:31,282 --> 00:37:33,734 COME ON. I'LL SHOW YOU HOW. 546 00:37:33,734 --> 00:37:35,686 I DIDN'T GET THESE CALLUSES WORKING IN THE GARDEN. 547 00:37:36,187 --> 00:37:38,689 COME ON. WE'LL DO IT TOGETHER. DAD, I ALREADY KNOW HOW. 548 00:37:38,689 --> 00:37:40,658 THEN WHY AREN'T YOU DOING IT? 549 00:37:40,658 --> 00:37:43,110 I DO. 550 00:37:43,110 --> 00:37:46,030 WELL, THEN WHY AREN'T YOU DOING IT MORE OFTEN? 551 00:37:46,030 --> 00:37:48,699 WHENEVER YOU GET THE URGE, JUST POLITELY EXCUSE YOURSELF, 552 00:37:48,699 --> 00:37:51,636 WHIP IT OUT AND WAKE UP MR. FLOPPY. 553 00:37:55,239 --> 00:37:58,209 DON'T TELL YOUR MOTHER, BUT I THINK THE QUICKEST WAY TO HEAVEN... 554 00:37:58,209 --> 00:38:02,413 IS WITH HALF A JAR OF PETROLEUM JELLY AND A CHAMOIS LEATHER GLOVE. 555 00:38:02,413 --> 00:38:06,751 FOR GOD SAKES, SON, JUST LEAVE THESE GIRLS ALONE. 556 00:38:06,751 --> 00:38:09,687 JUST FOR THE TIME BEING, OKAY? EH? 557 00:38:09,687 --> 00:38:11,605 YEAH. 558 00:38:11,605 --> 00:38:15,559 ALL RIGHT, SLUGGER? 559 00:38:15,559 --> 00:38:19,981 OH, AND, SON, ONE MORE THING. 560 00:38:19,981 --> 00:38:24,068 LET'S KEEP THIS LITTLE TALK JUST BETWEEN OURSELVES, OKAY? 561 00:38:24,068 --> 00:38:27,188 YOUR MOTHER, SHE-- SHE WOULDN'T UNDERSTAND. 562 00:38:27,188 --> 00:38:28,622 UH, DAD? 563 00:38:31,575 --> 00:38:33,077 YEAH. OW! 564 00:38:51,495 --> 00:38:55,383 [ Toothbrush Scrubbing ] 565 00:38:55,383 --> 00:38:58,386 ???? [ Soft Jazz ] 566 00:40:10,157 --> 00:40:13,861 [ Purring ] 567 00:40:13,861 --> 00:40:16,597 AL? I'M ALREADY LOTIONED. 568 00:40:17,014 --> 00:40:17,998 ???? [ Record Scratches ] 569 00:40:23,454 --> 00:40:24,955 [ Sighs ] 570 00:40:26,941 --> 00:40:28,943 WHERE ARE YOU GOING? 571 00:40:28,943 --> 00:40:30,945 I'M GONNA GO BUFF THE PIG. 572 00:40:30,945 --> 00:40:32,947 OKAY, DEAR. 573 00:40:34,448 --> 00:40:37,885 ???? [ "William Tell Overture" ] 574 00:41:00,391 --> 00:41:02,393 [ Yelling ] 575 00:41:11,335 --> 00:41:14,839 ???? [ Humming ] 576 00:41:14,839 --> 00:41:16,340 MORNING, HONEY. HEY. 577 00:41:16,340 --> 00:41:18,826 LOOKS LIKE SOMEBODY GOT UP ON THE RIGHT SIDE OF THE BED. 578 00:41:18,826 --> 00:41:21,328 OH, YEAH. 579 00:41:21,328 --> 00:41:23,314 GOOD MORNING, YOU TWO. 580 00:41:23,314 --> 00:41:24,815 MOM, WHAT'S UP? 581 00:41:25,316 --> 00:41:28,736 WE'RE PUTTING ON SOME SCENES FROM THE BIBLE FOR THE CHURCH PRESCHOOL. 582 00:41:28,736 --> 00:41:31,238 I'M A STONING VICTIM. PANCAKES? 583 00:41:31,238 --> 00:41:33,190 NO TIME FOR BREAKFAST THIS MORNING, HONEY. 584 00:41:33,691 --> 00:41:36,177 BUT, AL, I MADE THE HAPPY FACE PANCAKES. 585 00:41:36,660 --> 00:41:39,613 YOU KNOW, WITH THE CHOCOLATE CHIPS. 586 00:41:46,020 --> 00:41:48,022 YOU KIDS REMEMBER EVERYTHING YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO SAY AND DO IN SCHOOL? 587 00:41:48,022 --> 00:41:49,023 YEAH, NO SWEAT. 588 00:41:51,025 --> 00:41:53,978 [ Door Closes ] 589 00:41:55,479 --> 00:41:56,931 YOU LOOK GREAT, MOM. 590 00:41:56,931 --> 00:42:00,367 I'M STONED. 591 00:42:08,342 --> 00:42:13,347 [ Amber ] SADLY, ADAM WAS FORCED TO PRETEND THAT HE REALLY LIKED GINGER. 592 00:42:13,347 --> 00:42:16,350 HE'S A REALLY GOOD ACTOR. 593 00:42:28,312 --> 00:42:31,315 IF YOU REALLY LOVED ME, YOU'D BE CARRYING MY BOOKS. 594 00:42:38,822 --> 00:42:41,325 EWW. SO DO WE HAVE TO BE FRIENDS WITH HER NOW? 595 00:42:46,130 --> 00:42:48,566 ADAM! ???? [ Record Scratches ] 596 00:42:52,052 --> 00:42:53,520 UH-OH. 597 00:42:53,520 --> 00:42:55,956 LOOK, I-- I NEED TO TALK TO YOU, BABY. 598 00:42:56,457 --> 00:42:58,459 WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH THIS HO-BAG? 599 00:42:58,459 --> 00:43:00,461 HEY! EWW! 600 00:43:02,963 --> 00:43:05,966 JUST COME HERE. WHERE ARE WE GOING? 601 00:43:13,857 --> 00:43:15,359 IF YOU WEREN'T THE MOST POPULAR GUY IN HIGH SCHOOL, 602 00:43:15,859 --> 00:43:17,861 I WOULD SO BE BREAKING UP WITH YOU. 603 00:43:17,861 --> 00:43:20,364 BABY, WILL YOU JUST LISTEN TO ME FOR ONE SECOND? 604 00:43:20,364 --> 00:43:23,367 GINGER AND I HAVE TO PRETEND THAT WE'RE DATING AND IN LOVE. 605 00:43:23,367 --> 00:43:24,868 COME ON. YOU EXPECT ME TO BELIEVE THAT? 606 00:43:25,369 --> 00:43:27,855 WHAT KIND OF MORON WOULD TELL YOU TO DO THAT? CHUCK DID. 607 00:43:27,855 --> 00:43:31,792 I'M SORRY. WAS I TALKING TO YOU? NO, I DON'T THINK I WAS. 608 00:43:31,792 --> 00:43:33,744 WELL, HE DID. MY LAWYER SAID... 609 00:43:33,744 --> 00:43:35,696 THAT IF EVERYONE THINKS THAT I'M INNOCENT, 610 00:43:35,696 --> 00:43:36,697 I COULD GET OFF. 611 00:43:37,197 --> 00:43:40,084 HAVEN'T YOU GOTTEN OFF ENOUGH ALREADY? 612 00:43:40,084 --> 00:43:41,585 BABY, I LOVE YOU. 613 00:43:41,585 --> 00:43:44,088 THAT IS NOT THE PLAN. 614 00:43:44,088 --> 00:43:47,074 YOU MAKE MY HEART SING WITH THE SOUND OF MUSIC. 615 00:43:47,074 --> 00:43:48,509 YEAH, I ALREADY HAVE A BOYFRIEND. 616 00:43:49,009 --> 00:43:49,977 AND HE TREATS ME REAL GOOD. 617 00:43:49,977 --> 00:43:51,979 HOW NICE FOR YOU. YOU CAN HAVE ADAM. 618 00:43:52,463 --> 00:43:53,897 THIS IS JUST SO WE CAN GET A SETTLEMENT. 619 00:43:57,701 --> 00:43:59,119 SETTLEMENT? 620 00:43:59,119 --> 00:44:01,488 CHUCK SAID THAT IF WE GET THROUGH THIS PART, 621 00:44:01,488 --> 00:44:05,909 WE'LL BE ABLE TO SUE THE STATE OR THE PRESIDENT OR SOMETHING AND GET CASH. 622 00:44:05,909 --> 00:44:06,827 HE DID. 623 00:44:08,646 --> 00:44:10,280 REALLY? 624 00:44:10,280 --> 00:44:12,466 LIKE HOW MUCH ARE WE TALKING ABOUT HERE? 625 00:44:12,933 --> 00:44:14,385 LIKE A WHOLE TRUCKLOAD. 626 00:44:14,385 --> 00:44:16,337 HMM. 627 00:44:18,989 --> 00:44:21,492 THIS WILL MAKE ME LOOK REALLY, REALLY STUPID. 628 00:44:21,492 --> 00:44:23,977 WHO CARES IF IT'S GONNA MAKE YOU LOOK STUPID? 629 00:44:23,977 --> 00:44:25,879 I DO! 630 00:44:26,380 --> 00:44:27,865 WHAT IF I GET CHUCK TO PUT A SPIN ON THE STORY? 631 00:44:28,365 --> 00:44:31,518 WOULD THAT MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER? 632 00:44:31,518 --> 00:44:35,689 HMM. WELL, HOW LONG UNTIL WE GET THE MONEY? 633 00:44:36,190 --> 00:44:41,111 AS SOON AS ADAM GETS OFF AND I HAVE MY BABY, THEN I'M SO OUT OF HERE. 634 00:44:41,111 --> 00:44:44,565 BESIDES, JOHNNY ALREADY HAS A TRAILER PICKED OUT FOR THE BOTH OF US. 635 00:44:44,565 --> 00:44:48,419 AWW. THAT'S REALLY GREAT, LITTLE WHATEVER YOUR NAME IS, 636 00:44:48,919 --> 00:44:51,422 EXCEPT I DON'T CARE AND WOULD YOU MIND SHUTTING UP? 637 00:44:51,422 --> 00:44:52,923 BECAUSE I WASN'T TALKING TO YOU! 638 00:44:52,923 --> 00:44:54,792 BITCH. 639 00:44:56,677 --> 00:44:59,146 WHAT DID YOU JUST CALL ME? 640 00:44:59,146 --> 00:45:00,647 I SAID "BITCH." 641 00:45:05,302 --> 00:45:06,754 [ Girls Yelling ] 642 00:45:11,241 --> 00:45:14,628 [ Yelling Continues ] 643 00:45:25,456 --> 00:45:28,459 [ Amber ] THE SKANKETTE HAD LANDED ADAM IN SO MUCH TROUBLE. 644 00:45:28,459 --> 00:45:31,462 THE ONLY PLACE LEFT FOR HIM TO GO... 645 00:45:31,462 --> 00:45:34,465 WAS A MUSIC-ACCOMPANIED MONTAGE. 646 00:45:34,465 --> 00:45:38,469 ???? [ Grunge Rock ] 647 00:45:45,476 --> 00:45:47,978 ?? I'VE MEMORIZED THE BASICS ?? 648 00:45:52,483 --> 00:45:54,902 ?? MAKING STRANGE FACES ?? 649 00:45:59,406 --> 00:46:02,409 ?? SWIM SLOWLY FOR I KNOW ?? 650 00:46:02,409 --> 00:46:05,562 ?? THERE'S A THOUSAND MILES TO GO ?? 651 00:46:05,562 --> 00:46:08,432 ?? WITHOUT BLINKING ?? 652 00:46:12,169 --> 00:46:14,805 ?? I GRAVITATE SPACEWARDS ?? 653 00:46:16,306 --> 00:46:18,776 ?? FIND A HOME FOR THE HEAD ?? 654 00:46:19,276 --> 00:46:21,245 ?? FROM MY BASEMENT ?? 655 00:46:22,679 --> 00:46:25,949 ?? NO DARKNESS EVER LEFT ?? 656 00:46:25,949 --> 00:46:29,670 ?? THIS IS THE NOISE THIS IS THE SOUND ?? 657 00:46:31,121 --> 00:46:34,391 ? ?? HERE COMES THE WARM MACHINE ? 658 00:46:36,894 --> 00:46:39,897 ???? [ Fades ] 659 00:46:39,897 --> 00:46:42,366 [ Lydia ] AS YOU KNOW, I'M RUNNING FOR MAYOR. 660 00:46:42,366 --> 00:46:44,868 AND THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THAT. 661 00:46:44,868 --> 00:46:47,871 THIS HAS TO DO WITH THE STAGGERING SPEED AT WHICH OUR NATION'S MORALS... 662 00:46:48,372 --> 00:46:51,375 ARE SPIRALING OUT OF CONTROL. JUST STICK TO MY SCRIPT. 663 00:46:51,375 --> 00:46:54,344 OR MORE SIMPLY PUT, WHAT IS RIGHT AND WRONG. 664 00:46:54,344 --> 00:46:56,780 WHAT ADAM FISHER DID WAS WRONG. 665 00:46:59,283 --> 00:47:04,288 THERE WAS A TIME WHEN WE PUNISHED SUCH BEHAVIOR WITH APPROPRIATE MEASURES. 666 00:47:04,288 --> 00:47:07,791 UNFORTUNATELY, CASTRATION HAS BEEN DEEMED CRUEL AND UNUSUAL. 667 00:47:07,791 --> 00:47:11,745 THEREFORE, I INTEND TO SEEK THE HARSHEST POSSIBLE PUNISHMENT... 668 00:47:12,246 --> 00:47:15,249 UNDER COMMON "CRIMINAL CODDLING" LAWS. 669 00:47:15,249 --> 00:47:18,252 THAT IS 40 YEARS IN THE STATE PENITENTIARY. 670 00:47:18,752 --> 00:47:20,754 UP THE RIVER. DOWN THE RIVER. 671 00:47:20,754 --> 00:47:22,756 THE BIG HOUSE. 672 00:47:22,756 --> 00:47:25,259 THANK YOU. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR ATTENTION. 673 00:47:25,259 --> 00:47:27,261 AND REMEMBER, VOTE STONE. 674 00:47:27,261 --> 00:47:29,763 AND I MEAN BUSINESS. 675 00:47:40,791 --> 00:47:44,294 WELL, FOLKS, WE'VE HAD A SLIGHT SETBACK. 676 00:47:44,294 --> 00:47:46,730 HOW MUCH IS THIS ONE GONNA COST ME? 677 00:47:46,730 --> 00:47:49,366 FOR SOME REASON, ASSISTANT D.A. STONE... 678 00:47:49,366 --> 00:47:51,368 IS TAKING OVER FOR THE PROSECUTION. 679 00:47:51,368 --> 00:47:53,270 THAT CRAZY LADY WHO'S RUNNING FOR MAYOR? 680 00:47:53,720 --> 00:47:55,222 WHY? I DON'T KNOW. 681 00:47:55,222 --> 00:47:58,709 ALL I KNOW IS THAT SHE'S COMING AT US FULL FORCE. 682 00:47:58,709 --> 00:48:03,647 BITCH. HONEY, NOT IN FRONT OF THE KIDS. 683 00:48:03,647 --> 00:48:07,634 IT'S TRUE, MS. STONE IS A VERY AGGRESSIVE PROSECUTOR. 684 00:48:08,135 --> 00:48:09,636 [ Mr. Fisher ] GREAT. THERE GOES THE HOUSE. 685 00:48:10,053 --> 00:48:13,557 SO I'M UP FOR A LITTLE BIGGER OF A CHALLENGE. 686 00:48:13,557 --> 00:48:15,976 BUT NOTHING THAT I CAN'T HANDLE, OF COURSE. 687 00:48:16,476 --> 00:48:18,979 CHUCK, I WAS JUST WONDERING, 688 00:48:19,479 --> 00:48:23,984 IS THIS TRIAL THING GONNA HURT ADAM'S CHANCES OF GETTING INTO A GOOD COLLEGE? 689 00:48:24,484 --> 00:48:26,904 NO, NO. HIS GRADES WILL DO THAT. 690 00:48:26,904 --> 00:48:29,006 MRS. FISHER, PLEASE. I DON'T WANT YOU TO WORRY. 691 00:48:29,406 --> 00:48:31,341 I'M GONNA DO EVERYTHING IN MY POWER... 692 00:48:31,341 --> 00:48:32,843 TO MAKE SURE THAT ADAM DOESN'T GO TO PRISON. 693 00:48:32,843 --> 00:48:34,244 [ All ] PRISON? 694 00:48:35,646 --> 00:48:38,649 THAT'S WORST CASE SCENARIO, FOLKS. WORST CASE. 695 00:48:38,649 --> 00:48:42,619 CHUCK, WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY "PRISON"? 696 00:48:43,921 --> 00:48:46,106 WELL, UH, 697 00:48:46,607 --> 00:48:49,109 UNLAWFUL SEXUAL CONTACT WITH A CHILD ON MORE THAN THREE OCCASIONS... 698 00:48:49,109 --> 00:48:53,614 IS A CLASS "B" FELONY AND CARRIES A MAXIMUM PENALTY OF... 40 YEARS. 699 00:48:54,114 --> 00:49:00,070 FORTY YEARS? ALL HE DID WAS KNOCK UP THIS WHITE TRASH SLUT! 700 00:49:00,070 --> 00:49:01,571 DON'T YOU THINK WE'RE OVERREACTING HERE? 701 00:49:02,072 --> 00:49:03,573 GIRLS TODAY ARE PRACTICALLY LINING UP TO BE-- 702 00:49:03,573 --> 00:49:05,509 STATUTORILY RAPED? YES! 703 00:49:06,009 --> 00:49:08,412 MR. FISHER, I HAVE GIVEN THIS A LOT OF THOUGHT, 704 00:49:08,412 --> 00:49:13,250 SO YOU CAN ALL REST ASSURED KNOWING THAT ADAM IS IN MY HANDS. 705 00:49:15,686 --> 00:49:17,988 WE APPRECIATE ALL YOUR HELP, CHUCK. 706 00:49:17,988 --> 00:49:20,657 WE'D BE LOST WITHOUT YOU. 707 00:49:21,959 --> 00:49:23,860 THANKS, BABY DOLL. 708 00:49:25,862 --> 00:49:28,365 OH, RIGHT. THERE IS ONE MORE THING. 709 00:49:28,365 --> 00:49:32,002 OH, JEEZ. I KNEW IT. THE BILL. 710 00:49:32,002 --> 00:49:36,456 YEAH. APPARENTLY, MS. STONE FOUND OUT THAT GINGER WAS LIVING IN YOUR HOME... 711 00:49:36,456 --> 00:49:42,045 BECAUSE SHE FILED A MOTION FOR A NO-CONTACT ORDER BETWEEN ADAM AND GINGER. 712 00:49:42,045 --> 00:49:45,248 MR. FISHER, YOU ARE TO HAVE NO FURTHER CONTACT WITH THIS YOUNG LADY, 713 00:49:45,649 --> 00:49:48,051 WHO SHALL BE REFERRED TO FROM NOW ON BY HER INITIALS, 714 00:49:48,452 --> 00:49:50,053 WHICH ARE G.A.G. 715 00:49:52,789 --> 00:49:54,291 [ Amber ] YUP. IN MY EYES, 716 00:49:54,291 --> 00:49:58,295 THE U.S. LEGAL SYSTEM WAS WORKING JUST FINE. 717 00:50:00,797 --> 00:50:04,234 NOW ADAM AND I WERE HAPPILY TOGETHER AGAIN, 718 00:50:04,234 --> 00:50:07,237 AND I WASN'T ABOUT TO LET HIM GO ASTRAY. 719 00:50:14,144 --> 00:50:15,145 HI. 720 00:50:21,151 --> 00:50:23,653 LOOK, I HAVE TO STOP BY CHUCK'S OFFICE AFTER SCHOOL. 721 00:50:23,653 --> 00:50:26,156 OH, GREAT. WHAT FOR NOW? 722 00:50:26,156 --> 00:50:28,108 I DON'T KNOW. 723 00:50:28,592 --> 00:50:31,395 THAT GUY GIVES ME THE CREEPS. 724 00:50:31,395 --> 00:50:33,313 WELL, GINGER THINKS HE'S KIND OF SEXY. 725 00:50:33,313 --> 00:50:35,716 OH, YEAH? 726 00:50:35,716 --> 00:50:39,186 WELL, GINGER'S BRAIN IS ALSO THE SIZE OF A LEGO! 727 00:50:47,611 --> 00:50:49,463 ADAM! ADAM! HERE HE COMES. 728 00:50:49,463 --> 00:50:51,915 HOW DOES IT FEEL, BEING FORCIBLY SEPARATED FROM THE GIRL YOU LOVE? 729 00:50:51,915 --> 00:50:53,366 WILL YOU ABIDE BY THE JUDGE'S DECISION? 730 00:50:53,366 --> 00:50:54,851 MISS, WHAT'S YOUR RELATION TO ADAM? 731 00:50:54,851 --> 00:50:57,304 I'M-- A FRIEND. AMBER. 732 00:50:57,304 --> 00:51:00,807 AMBER IS ADAM'S LITTLE LESBIAN FRIEND, 733 00:51:00,807 --> 00:51:04,311 HERE PROVIDING SUPPORT IN THIS-- HIS TIME OF NEED. 734 00:51:04,311 --> 00:51:07,814 I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU TO COME ALONE. [ Reporters Yelling ] 735 00:51:07,814 --> 00:51:10,150 [ Chuck ] ADAM WILL BE MAKING AN OFFICIAL STATEMENT JUST IN A FEW MINUTES. 736 00:51:10,150 --> 00:51:13,653 IN THE MEANTIME, PLEASE PARTAKE IN THE REFRESHMENTS. 737 00:51:13,653 --> 00:51:15,655 OH. HI, MR. AND MRS. FISHER. 738 00:51:16,156 --> 00:51:17,624 WELL, HELLO, SWEETHEART. 739 00:51:19,993 --> 00:51:22,496 A LESBIAN? [ Chuckles ] 740 00:51:22,979 --> 00:51:24,948 WHAT'S WITH ALL THE REPORTERS? ALL PART OF MY MASTER PLAN... 741 00:51:25,449 --> 00:51:27,434 TO GET YOU OFF THE HOOK, PAL. 742 00:51:27,434 --> 00:51:29,386 SO, HERE. 743 00:51:29,386 --> 00:51:31,838 THIS IS A STATEMENT I'VE PREPARED FOR YOU TO READ. 744 00:51:31,838 --> 00:51:35,275 WE REALLY GOT TO PLAY UP THAT ROMEO AND JULIET ASPECT. 745 00:51:35,275 --> 00:51:37,677 HEY, DIDN'T THEY DIE AT THE END? 746 00:51:38,628 --> 00:51:40,547 THEY DO? 747 00:51:41,815 --> 00:51:44,801 WOW. THE CASE AGAINST YOU, ADAM, IS PRETTY STRONG. 748 00:51:44,801 --> 00:51:48,054 IT SAYS HERE THAT YOU SLEPT WITH GINGER SOME, UH, 749 00:51:49,439 --> 00:51:51,842 THIRTY-NINE TIMES. 750 00:51:51,842 --> 00:51:54,227 OH, YOU-- 751 00:52:02,552 --> 00:52:05,972 WHAT WE'VE GOTTA DO IS RAISE PUBLIC SUPPORT FOR YOUR CAUSE. 752 00:52:05,972 --> 00:52:07,774 BY THE TIME I'M DONE, 753 00:52:07,774 --> 00:52:10,727 THE PUBLIC WILL BE OUTRAGED AT THIS UNJUST LAW... 754 00:52:10,727 --> 00:52:15,365 THAT WOULD SEPARATE AND PUNISH TWO PEOPLE SIMPLY FOR FALLING IN LOVE. 755 00:52:15,765 --> 00:52:17,217 THAT SOUNDS COOL. 756 00:52:17,217 --> 00:52:18,535 OH, YEAH. 757 00:52:18,535 --> 00:52:21,438 COOL? 758 00:52:21,438 --> 00:52:23,940 COOL? 759 00:52:28,161 --> 00:52:32,032 ALL GINGER AND I EVER WANTED WAS TO BE HAPPY TOGETHER. 760 00:52:32,032 --> 00:52:34,034 WE NEVER MEANT TO HURT ANYONE. 761 00:52:34,034 --> 00:52:36,520 NOW, WE'RE BEING FORCED TO PART AT A TIME... 762 00:52:36,520 --> 00:52:39,022 WHEN SHE MOST NEEDS MY LOVE AND ATTENTION. 763 00:52:39,022 --> 00:52:42,008 BUT, STILL, I INTEND TO DO WHATEVER POSSIBLE... 764 00:52:42,008 --> 00:52:45,512 TO PROVIDE FOR HER AND OUR FAMILY. 765 00:52:45,512 --> 00:52:49,933 THEREFORE, I WILL BE DROPPING OUT OF SCHOOL IMMEDIATELY-- 766 00:52:50,433 --> 00:52:52,435 RIGHT ON. 767 00:52:52,435 --> 00:52:57,941 AND WILL BE GETTING A JOB SO THAT I MIGHT PROVIDE FOR OUR FAMILY. 768 00:52:57,941 --> 00:52:59,943 CHUCK, MY DAD ALREADY HAS A JOB. 769 00:52:59,943 --> 00:53:01,945 KEEP READING. 770 00:53:02,445 --> 00:53:04,948 I ALSO INTEND TO ASK GINGER FOR HER HAND IN MARRIAGE. 771 00:53:04,948 --> 00:53:06,950 [ Gasps ] 772 00:53:06,950 --> 00:53:09,452 THAT IS ALL I HAVE TO SAY AT THIS TIME. 773 00:53:09,452 --> 00:53:11,454 THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION. 774 00:53:11,454 --> 00:53:13,957 AND, PLEASE, ONLY ONE DOUGHNUT PER PERSON. 775 00:53:13,957 --> 00:53:15,458 ADAM! WHERE'S GINGER? 776 00:53:15,458 --> 00:53:17,460 THAT'S ALL, FOLKS. THANK YOU VERY MUCH. 777 00:53:17,460 --> 00:53:20,463 AND PLEASE GO AND SPREAD THE WORD. 778 00:53:23,200 --> 00:53:25,702 MOM, DO I REALLY HAVE TO MARRY GINGER? 779 00:53:25,702 --> 00:53:29,206 HONEY, THAT IS THE RIGHT THING TO DO. BUT I DON'T LOVE HER. 780 00:53:30,707 --> 00:53:34,211 LOTS OF GUYS GET MARRIED TO WOMEN THEY DON'T LOVE. 781 00:53:34,211 --> 00:53:37,714 I READ THAT SOME WOMEN DON'T HAVE SEX WITH THEIR HUSBANDS... 782 00:53:37,714 --> 00:53:41,151 BECAUSE THE MEN DON'T HAVE A CLUE HOW TO BRING THEM TO ORGASM. 783 00:53:41,151 --> 00:53:45,855 BUT ISN'T IT WRONG TO GO TELLING EVERYONE I LOVE HER WHEN I DON'T? 784 00:53:45,855 --> 00:53:48,141 SOMETIMES IT'S OKAY TO TELL LITTLE WHITE LIES. 785 00:53:48,141 --> 00:53:51,611 ESPECIALLY THE ONES THAT CAN KEEP YOU OUT OF PRISON. 786 00:53:51,611 --> 00:53:54,531 HOW CAN IT BE OKAY TO LIE ABOUT SOMETHING SO IMPORTANT? 787 00:53:54,931 --> 00:53:56,366 EITHER LOVE THE LITTLE TRAMP... 788 00:53:56,866 --> 00:53:58,368 OR YOU'RE GONNA BE GETTING SOME TOUGH LOVE... 789 00:53:58,368 --> 00:54:01,154 FROM YOUR CELLMATE UP AT THE STATE PEN. 790 00:54:01,154 --> 00:54:07,294 SO THINK ABOUT THAT WHEN BUBBA SAYS, "SPOT ME IN THE WEIGHT ROOM." 791 00:54:07,294 --> 00:54:09,296 YEAH. 792 00:54:09,779 --> 00:54:12,716 "BUBBA"? 793 00:54:12,716 --> 00:54:17,637 IT'S A GENERIC PRISON GUY. BUBBA. 794 00:54:17,637 --> 00:54:21,057 BIG, MUSCLEY, 795 00:54:21,057 --> 00:54:23,226 SOUTHERN? AND DOMINANT. 796 00:54:27,547 --> 00:54:30,550 [ Amber ] WHILE CHUCK'S SPIN WAS TAKING EFFECT, 797 00:54:30,550 --> 00:54:35,055 THE REAL STORY TOOK A TURN AS GINGER FOUND HERSELF IN THE HOSPITAL EARLIER THAN EXPECTED. 798 00:54:35,055 --> 00:54:37,057 WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO DO TO GET A BEER AROUND HERE? 799 00:54:37,057 --> 00:54:40,010 NATURALLY, HER MOTHER WAS CONCERNED. 800 00:54:40,010 --> 00:54:43,013 [ P.A. ] NURSE JAMISON TO THE O.R. 801 00:54:43,013 --> 00:54:45,515 DR. MOYLE, PLEASE REPORT TO PEDIATRICS. 802 00:54:45,515 --> 00:54:48,018 DR. MOYLE TO PEDIATRICS. 803 00:54:48,018 --> 00:54:50,337 [ Ringing ] 804 00:54:50,337 --> 00:54:52,339 I'LL GET IT. 805 00:54:53,840 --> 00:54:57,310 - HELLO? - HI. I HAD A MISCARRIAGE. 806 00:54:57,310 --> 00:54:59,813 WHAT? YOU HEARD ME. 807 00:54:59,813 --> 00:55:01,765 I HAD A MISCARRIAGE. 808 00:55:01,765 --> 00:55:03,133 WHAT HAPPENED? 809 00:55:03,133 --> 00:55:06,703 I DON'T KNOW. IT JUST KINDA IT CAME OUT BEFORE IT WAS DONE. 810 00:55:06,703 --> 00:55:08,088 WOW. 811 00:55:08,588 --> 00:55:11,041 I GUESS IT WAS GOD'S WAY OF TELLING ME I'M NOT READY TO BE A MOTHER. 812 00:55:11,041 --> 00:55:12,242 YOU THINK? 813 00:55:15,378 --> 00:55:17,647 SO ARE YOU GONNA BE OKAY AND ALL? 814 00:55:18,148 --> 00:55:23,820 YEAH. THE NURSE SAID MY MOM CAN ONLY STAY TILL 7:30. 815 00:55:23,820 --> 00:55:26,122 ANYHOW, I BETTER GET OFF THE PHONE. 816 00:55:26,122 --> 00:55:28,575 MY MOM HAS TO CHECK IN WITH HER PAROLE OFFICER. 817 00:55:28,575 --> 00:55:31,544 OKAY. BYE. BYE. 818 00:55:34,130 --> 00:55:35,465 WHO WAS THAT, SWEETIE? 819 00:55:35,465 --> 00:55:37,834 GINGER. 820 00:55:37,834 --> 00:55:41,438 OH, HONEY, SHE'S NOT SUPPOSED TO CALL HERE. 821 00:55:41,438 --> 00:55:43,656 THAT'S A NO-NO. YEAH, BUT... 822 00:55:43,656 --> 00:55:45,625 DON'T TALK BACK TO YOUR MOTHER. 823 00:55:49,646 --> 00:55:52,098 I THINK SHE SHOULD DO HER HAIR DIFFERENTLY. 824 00:55:54,050 --> 00:55:58,338 MY DAD SAYS SHE'S A LA-LA-LESBIAN. 825 00:56:00,290 --> 00:56:02,258 THAT'S WHY SHE'S PUTTING THE SCREWS ON ADAM. 826 00:56:03,676 --> 00:56:07,397 IMAGINE. KEEPING HIM AWAY FROM THE GIRL HE LOVES. 827 00:56:09,849 --> 00:56:14,237 WELL, THE BOY DID BEHAVE IRRESPONSIBLY. 828 00:56:14,237 --> 00:56:16,156 HAVE YOU NO SENSE OF ROMANCE? 829 00:56:18,091 --> 00:56:21,811 HOW COMEINSIDE SCOOP DOESN'T WANT TO INTERVIEW ME? 830 00:56:21,811 --> 00:56:25,348 [ TV ] TONIGHT, ONINSIDE SCOOP, THE CONSEQUENCES OF TEEN SEX. 831 00:56:25,348 --> 00:56:28,184 MY CLIENT IS A VICTIM OF LOVE. 832 00:56:28,184 --> 00:56:31,154 NO MORE, NO LESS. 833 00:56:31,154 --> 00:56:35,658 ADAM AND GINGER ARE VERY MUCH A MODERN DAY ROMEO AND JULIET. 834 00:56:35,658 --> 00:56:39,062 FORCED APART... NOT BY THEIR FAMILIES, 835 00:56:39,062 --> 00:56:44,701 BUT BY THE VERY LAW THAT IS MEANT TO ENSURE LIBERTY TO ALL CITIZENS. 836 00:56:44,701 --> 00:56:49,456 WE ARE CERTAIN THAT THE PUBLIC WILL BE OUTRAGED AT THIS MISCARRIAGE OF JUSTICE. 837 00:56:49,956 --> 00:56:53,343 ADAM, TELL ME, HOW DOES IT FEEL... 838 00:56:53,343 --> 00:56:57,697 KNOWING THAT YOU WON'T BE ABLE TO BE WITH THE ONE YOU LOVE DURING HER PREGNANCY? 839 00:56:59,849 --> 00:57:01,851 UH... 840 00:57:01,851 --> 00:57:04,654 BAD. REAL BAD. 841 00:57:05,054 --> 00:57:06,256 [ Amber ] ADAM'S A BRILLIANT ACTOR. 842 00:57:06,656 --> 00:57:08,425 LIKE JAMES VAN DER BEEK BRILLIANCE. 843 00:57:08,425 --> 00:57:11,294 THE WHOLE COMMUNITY IS BACKING ADAM AND GINGER IN THEIR PLIGHT. 844 00:57:11,294 --> 00:57:13,296 BEHIND ME, YOU SEE SOME AVID SUPPORTERS. 845 00:57:13,296 --> 00:57:15,799 AND ALSO THE LOCAL CHAPTER OF THE SCOUTS... 846 00:57:15,799 --> 00:57:18,718 IS HOLDING A SPAGHETTI DINNER AT THE VFW, 847 00:57:18,718 --> 00:57:21,104 AND ALSO THE ACLU WILL HAVE A CAR WASH. 848 00:57:21,104 --> 00:57:22,522 ALL THIS IN THE HOPES OF RAISING MONEY... 849 00:57:22,939 --> 00:57:26,042 TO HELP PAY FOR ADAM FISHER'S GROWING LEGAL FEES. 850 00:57:26,042 --> 00:57:27,961 [ TV Off ] YOU CAN FEEL FREE TO TELL ME... 851 00:57:27,961 --> 00:57:29,963 THIS IS JUST A DREAM ANY TIME NOW. 852 00:57:29,963 --> 00:57:32,465 WE JUST HAVE TO SIT TIGHT AND RIDE IT OUT. 853 00:57:32,465 --> 00:57:35,468 RIDE IT OUT? THE SCOUTS ARE INVOLVED, YOU MORON. 854 00:57:35,969 --> 00:57:38,388 WE EXPECTED SOME OF THIS TO HAPPEN. WE DID? 855 00:57:38,388 --> 00:57:42,392 THE MEDIA'S PORTRAYING ME AS A PSYCHOTIC, POWER HUNGRY, MAN-HATING BITCH. 856 00:57:42,892 --> 00:57:44,894 IT'S NOT AS BAD AS THAT. OH, NO? 857 00:57:47,814 --> 00:57:51,634 HAS EVERYONE COMPLETELY FORGOTTEN THAT HE BROKE THE LAW? 858 00:57:56,940 --> 00:57:58,575 [ Amber ] I REALLY WAS TRYING TO BE CALM. 859 00:57:58,975 --> 00:58:02,278 BUT IT'S JUST VERY HARD WHEN THE FUTURE YOU'VE PLANNED SINCE MEETING ADAM IN 6th GRADE... 860 00:58:02,278 --> 00:58:04,280 IS IN JEOPARDY. 861 00:58:04,280 --> 00:58:06,282 MAYBE YOU SHOULD TAKE SOME MORE OF THESE. OH, NO, NO, NO. 862 00:58:06,783 --> 00:58:08,785 DO NOT TRY TO CHANGE THE SUBJECT. 863 00:58:08,785 --> 00:58:11,254 CHUCK SAYS THAT YOU SHOULD TAKE THOSE. DICK. 864 00:58:11,254 --> 00:58:12,739 NO, CHUCK. 865 00:58:14,674 --> 00:58:18,178 ADAM, IF YOU MARRY HER, 866 00:58:18,178 --> 00:58:20,180 WE ARE OFFICIALLY OVER. 867 00:58:20,180 --> 00:58:22,682 ALL CHUCK WANTS TO DO IS KEEP ME OUT OF PRISON. 868 00:58:22,682 --> 00:58:26,653 PRISON? YOU'RE GONNA GO TO PRISON FOR KNOCKING UP THAT HO? 869 00:58:26,653 --> 00:58:30,657 IF ALL THE GUYS THAT SCREWED HER WENT TO PRISON, THEY'D HAVE TO ADD ON ANOTHER WING. 870 00:58:30,657 --> 00:58:32,158 YOU THINK SHE SLEEPS AROUND? 871 00:58:33,610 --> 00:58:36,613 AHEM. DOES ICE MELT? 872 00:58:38,565 --> 00:58:42,569 AMBER, YOU HAVE TO TRUST ME WHEN I SAY THAT EVERYTHING I'M DOING HERE IS FOR US. 873 00:58:42,569 --> 00:58:45,004 I FIND THAT A LITTLE HARD TO BELIEVE. 874 00:58:45,004 --> 00:58:50,009 AS SOON AS THIS IS OVER, I'M GONNA DIVORCE HER AND GO BACK TO SCHOOL. 875 00:58:50,009 --> 00:58:52,011 I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU DROPPED OUT OF SCHOOL. 876 00:58:52,011 --> 00:58:53,963 CHUCK THINKS IT'D LOOK GOOD IF I GOT A JOB. 877 00:58:53,963 --> 00:58:57,967 WE WORKED SO HARD TO RAISE YOUR G.P.A. TO A D-MINUS. 878 00:58:57,967 --> 00:59:01,971 I KNOW, BUT IF I GET A JOB, EVERYONE WILL THINK I WANT TO TAKE THE RESPONSIBILITY. 879 00:59:01,971 --> 00:59:04,407 [ Groans ] 880 00:59:04,407 --> 00:59:07,911 I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS IS MY LIFE. 881 00:59:07,911 --> 00:59:09,412 ISN'T HE SMART? 882 00:59:11,347 --> 00:59:14,350 HE THINKS OF EVERYTHING. 883 00:59:14,350 --> 00:59:16,352 [ SIGHING ] 884 00:59:25,345 --> 00:59:27,747 [ Amber ] BOYS AND THEIR CARS. I JUST DON'T GET IT. 885 00:59:28,248 --> 00:59:30,600 ANYWAY, EVEN THOUGH ADAM WAS CHARGED WITH A SEX CRIME, 886 00:59:30,600 --> 00:59:34,103 WOMEN FROM ALL OVER NOW FOUND HIM IRRESISTIBLE. 887 00:59:34,103 --> 00:59:36,105 THIS DID POSE A MORAL QUANDARY, 888 00:59:36,105 --> 00:59:39,609 BUT IT JUST REINFORCED MY AFFECTION FOR HIM. 889 00:59:39,609 --> 00:59:43,563 YOU KNOW, THAT'S WHAT HAPPENS WHEN OTHER GIRLS LIKE YOUR BOYFRIEND. 890 00:59:44,063 --> 00:59:48,401 AWESOME! ?? SOME PEOPLE TELL ME I'VE GOT A BAD ATTITUDE ?? 891 00:59:48,401 --> 00:59:51,821 ?? 'CAUSE I GREW UP LEARNIN' TO BE RUDE ?? 892 00:59:51,821 --> 00:59:54,741 ?? IT FEELS GOOD ?? 893 00:59:57,677 --> 01:00:01,614 THAT JUDGE DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING ABOUT ME CONTACTING YOU, DID HE? 894 01:00:01,614 --> 01:00:03,616 NO, I GUESS NOT. 895 01:00:03,616 --> 01:00:05,618 AND... 896 01:00:05,618 --> 01:00:07,870 MY MOM'S OVER AT BIBLE STUDY. 897 01:00:08,354 --> 01:00:11,357 NO. I JUST CAME OVER 'CAUSE I WANTED TO SAY GOOD-BYE. 898 01:00:11,357 --> 01:00:13,743 GOOD-BYE? 899 01:00:13,743 --> 01:00:17,664 YEAH. I'M MOVING TO NEW YORK TO LIVE WITH MY STEPDAD. 900 01:00:17,664 --> 01:00:19,599 I THOUGHT YOU SAID HE'S A HOMO. 901 01:00:19,599 --> 01:00:21,050 WELL, HE IS, BUT MY MOM'S A FREAK. 902 01:00:21,551 --> 01:00:23,553 YEAH, YOU GOT THAT RIGHT. 903 01:00:23,553 --> 01:00:26,539 SO I GUESS I WON'T BE SEEING YOU AROUND ANYMORE. 904 01:00:26,539 --> 01:00:29,225 NO, BUT IT'S KINDA BETTER THAT WAY, YOU KNOW, 905 01:00:29,225 --> 01:00:32,111 'CAUSE EVERYTHING'S GOTTEN SO CRAZY. 906 01:00:32,111 --> 01:00:35,531 ALL WE DID WAS DO THE NASTY. 907 01:00:43,439 --> 01:00:45,441 SO, DO YOU WANT TO DO IT AGAIN? 908 01:00:53,499 --> 01:00:58,137 THIS KID DOESN'T SCREW THINGS UP, I'M HOME FREE. 909 01:00:58,137 --> 01:01:00,039 ALL RIGHT. 910 01:01:01,491 --> 01:01:03,376 I'M HOME FREE. 911 01:01:05,878 --> 01:01:07,880 I'M HOME FREE! 912 01:01:07,880 --> 01:01:08,881 WHO'S HOME FREE? 913 01:01:09,382 --> 01:01:11,384 CHUCKIE'S HOME FREE, HOME FREE. 914 01:01:17,156 --> 01:01:20,243 CHUCK CLOPPERMAN, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! 915 01:01:23,129 --> 01:01:25,098 HOME FREE! 916 01:01:25,098 --> 01:01:28,051 CHUCKIE'S IN THE HOUSE. CHUCKIE'S IN THE HOUSE. 917 01:01:28,051 --> 01:01:30,053 CHUCKIE'S IN THE HOUSE. 918 01:01:30,553 --> 01:01:34,991 HOME FREE, AS LONG AS THAT KID DOESN'T SCREW IT UP! 919 01:01:34,991 --> 01:01:36,993 [ Amber ] IF CHUCK WASN'T SUCH A MORON, 920 01:01:36,993 --> 01:01:39,495 HE'D HAVE KNOWN THE ODDS OF ADAM NOT SCREWING THINGS UP... 921 01:01:39,495 --> 01:01:42,365 WERE PRETTY MUCH NEXT TO NOTHING. 922 01:01:42,365 --> 01:01:43,716 HELLO? 923 01:01:47,220 --> 01:01:49,138 [ Moaning ] 924 01:01:51,140 --> 01:01:53,643 [ Mrs. Fisher ] ADAM, HONEY, I'M HOME! 925 01:01:53,643 --> 01:01:56,546 OH, MY GOD, IT'S MY MOM. 926 01:01:58,898 --> 01:02:00,867 HEY, SWEETIE! 927 01:02:00,867 --> 01:02:02,819 UH, HI, MOM. 928 01:02:02,819 --> 01:02:04,821 CAN YOU GO TO THE KITCHEN FOR A SECOND? 929 01:02:04,821 --> 01:02:08,241 WELL, YES, I CAN, BUT WHY WOULD I WANT TO? 930 01:02:08,741 --> 01:02:11,711 WELL, I WANTED TO ASK YOU ABOUT-- 931 01:02:11,711 --> 01:02:13,713 ASK YOU ABOUT JESUS. 932 01:02:13,713 --> 01:02:15,715 YEAH, I HAVE SOME JESUS-TYPE QUESTIONS FOR YOU. 933 01:02:15,715 --> 01:02:17,900 TALK ABOUT PERFECT TIMING. 934 01:02:17,900 --> 01:02:20,853 BROTHER THOMAS HERE HAS COME OVER FOR COFFEE. 935 01:02:20,853 --> 01:02:22,855 HE JUST FINISHED SEMINARY, 936 01:02:22,855 --> 01:02:25,291 AND HE'S HEADING OUT TO TEACH THE HEATHENS ABOUT JESUS. 937 01:02:25,291 --> 01:02:27,293 ISN'T THAT RIGHT, THOMAS? YES, MA'AM. 938 01:02:27,293 --> 01:02:30,430 I'M GOING TO ASSUME MISSIONARY POSITION FOR THE CONGREGATION. 939 01:02:30,430 --> 01:02:34,300 YOU MEAN, LIKE, DURING THE SERVICE? 940 01:02:34,300 --> 01:02:36,519 NO. I'LL BE DOING IT OVER IN CHINA. 941 01:02:37,019 --> 01:02:39,021 OH. 942 01:02:39,021 --> 01:02:41,457 [ Mrs. Fisher ] WHY DON'T I WHIP UP SOME DEVILED EGGS, 943 01:02:41,457 --> 01:02:43,459 AND YOU TWO CAN TALK SHOP, OKAY? 944 01:02:43,459 --> 01:02:44,877 GREAT. 945 01:02:44,877 --> 01:02:46,829 ALL RIGHT. 946 01:02:46,829 --> 01:02:49,265 YEAH. 947 01:02:49,265 --> 01:02:50,767 COME ON. 948 01:02:50,767 --> 01:02:55,204 GOSH, IT'S SO EXCITING GOING TO A FOREIGN LAND. OH, YEAH. 949 01:02:55,204 --> 01:02:58,124 YOU KNOW, I BET THEY MAKE SOME GREAT CHINESE FOOD OVER THERE IN CHINA. 950 01:02:58,624 --> 01:03:00,576 [ Thomas ] ACTUALLY, NOT. 951 01:03:00,576 --> 01:03:03,446 OH. 952 01:03:03,946 --> 01:03:06,816 I CAN GIVE YOU SOME MACARONI AND CHEESE TO TAKE OVER THERE. 953 01:03:11,320 --> 01:03:13,823 ?? I MIGHT WALK A LITTLE FUNNY BUT MY WALK IS ME ?? 954 01:03:13,823 --> 01:03:16,275 ?? I MIGHT STUTTER WHEN I TALK BUT I SAY WHAT I SEE ?? 955 01:03:16,776 --> 01:03:19,762 ?? I DON'T AGREE WITH EVERY OTHE LITTLE THING THAT'S PROVEN ?? 956 01:03:19,762 --> 01:03:22,215 ?? I DO A LOT OF THINGS THAT I SHOULDN'T BE DOIN' ?? 957 01:03:22,715 --> 01:03:24,717 ?? I RUIN EVERYTHING YOU MIGHT'VE HAD IN MIND ?? 958 01:03:24,717 --> 01:03:27,720 ?? I'M CONSISTENT, BELLIGERENT SOLIDIFIED FIND ?? 959 01:03:28,221 --> 01:03:30,173 ?? RHINESTONE FREAK SUBURBAN STAR ?? 960 01:03:30,173 --> 01:03:33,109 ?? I AIN'T GOT NO MONEY AND I GOT NO CAR ?? 961 01:03:33,109 --> 01:03:38,614 ?? I DON'T KNOW WHY I COME HERE BUT I KNOW I'LL NEVER LEAVE ?? 962 01:03:39,115 --> 01:03:41,617 ?? IT'S THE ONLY PLACE I WANNA BE ?? 963 01:03:41,617 --> 01:03:44,036 ?? YEAH, YEAH, YEAH ???? 964 01:03:45,538 --> 01:03:48,541 [ Amber ] I KNOW, BUT THAT REALLY DID HAPPEN. 965 01:03:48,541 --> 01:03:51,911 GINGER, DON'T THEY TEACH YOU ANYTHING ABOUT SAFE SEX OUT THERE IN THE BOONIES? 966 01:03:51,911 --> 01:03:54,413 DAD, SHUT UP. 967 01:03:54,413 --> 01:03:55,915 IS IT CHANGING? 968 01:03:56,415 --> 01:03:58,401 ARE YOU SURE WE DID IT RIGHT, HONEY? 969 01:03:58,401 --> 01:04:00,887 DAD, TRUST ME. I HAVE DONE THIS BEFORE. 970 01:04:01,387 --> 01:04:03,389 YOU KNOW, I AM SO NERVOUS. 971 01:04:03,389 --> 01:04:07,393 OLIVER, WHY DO YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO BE SUCH A DRAMA QUEEN? 972 01:04:07,393 --> 01:04:10,396 GINGER, THAT'S NO WAY TO TALK TO YOUR FATHER, ESPECIALLY-- 973 01:04:10,897 --> 01:04:11,397 OH! 974 01:04:15,318 --> 01:04:19,639 WE'RE GONNA BE GRANDPARENTS! [ Laughing ] 975 01:04:19,639 --> 01:04:23,926 I'LL GET TO DECORATE THE BABY'S ROOM AND EVERYTHING! IT'S GONNA BE SO GREAT. 976 01:04:23,926 --> 01:04:25,828 GINGER, HONEY? 977 01:04:25,828 --> 01:04:29,298 YOU HEARD ME. I'M PREGGERS AGAIN. 978 01:04:29,298 --> 01:04:30,499 DAMN, I'M GOOD. 979 01:04:30,499 --> 01:04:32,101 YEAH, THANKS A LOT. 980 01:04:32,101 --> 01:04:34,103 HEY, IT'S NOT MY FAULT. 981 01:04:34,103 --> 01:04:36,105 WELL, YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO WEAR A CONDOM. 982 01:04:36,105 --> 01:04:39,709 ???? [ Men Singing ] YEAH, AND YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO REMIND ME. 983 01:04:39,709 --> 01:04:41,310 WHAT'S THAT IN THE BACKGROUND? 984 01:04:41,310 --> 01:04:43,713 OH, THAT'S JUST MY STEPDAD AND OLIVER. 985 01:04:43,713 --> 01:04:45,715 ARE THEY DOING IT? 986 01:04:45,715 --> 01:04:47,316 NO, YOU MORON. 987 01:04:47,316 --> 01:04:49,719 THEY'RE DANCING AROUND THE ROOM, SINGING SHOW TUNES. 988 01:04:50,152 --> 01:04:52,388 WHOA, ROCKY WAS RIGHT. 989 01:04:52,388 --> 01:04:54,790 SO, LIKE, WHAT ARE WE SUPPOSED TO TELL PEOPLE? 990 01:04:54,790 --> 01:04:57,727 WELL, DID YOU TELL ANYONE BUT YOUR MOM ABOUT THE MISCARRIAGE? 991 01:04:57,727 --> 01:04:58,928 UM, NO. 992 01:04:58,928 --> 01:05:01,731 WELL, IF WE WANT A SETTLEMENT, WE JUST WON'T SAY ANYTHING. 993 01:05:02,131 --> 01:05:03,332 NOBODY WILL KNOW THE DIFFERENCE. 994 01:05:03,332 --> 01:05:05,334 OKAY. WELL, LOOK, I GOTTA GO. 995 01:05:05,334 --> 01:05:08,537 JOHNNY'S PAROLE HEARING IS IN AN HOUR. BYE. 996 01:05:10,856 --> 01:05:12,358 WHO WAS THAT, HONEY? 997 01:05:12,358 --> 01:05:15,845 UH, AMBER. 998 01:05:15,845 --> 01:05:17,813 HOW IS THE LITTLE ANGEL? 999 01:05:17,813 --> 01:05:19,749 FINE. 1000 01:05:19,749 --> 01:05:23,686 YOU TELL HER TO COME OVER FOR DINNER SOON. AHEM! 1001 01:05:23,686 --> 01:05:27,189 UH, ON SECOND THOUGHT, YOU BETTER NOT. 1002 01:05:27,189 --> 01:05:29,191 UNLESS SHE'S ON HER PERIOD. 1003 01:05:34,580 --> 01:05:38,050 OH, LOOK! REDDI-WIP'S ON SALE! 1004 01:05:38,050 --> 01:05:40,052 YOU KNOW HOW YOU LOVE REDDI-WIP! 1005 01:05:53,499 --> 01:05:56,502 [ Amber ] AS THE TRIAL APPROACHED, THINGS GOT WEIRDER AND WEIRDER. 1006 01:05:56,502 --> 01:06:01,507 I WAS FORCED TO ENDURE MORE AND MORE INDIGNITIES. 1007 01:06:01,507 --> 01:06:03,442 EWW. 1008 01:06:03,943 --> 01:06:06,946 WHAT DOES THAT FINGER THING MEAN ANYWAY? 1009 01:06:08,948 --> 01:06:11,133 DAMN IT. 1010 01:06:11,133 --> 01:06:12,985 DO YOU KNOW WHAT THEY'RE DOING? 1011 01:06:12,985 --> 01:06:16,288 THEY'RE TRYING TO PUT A SPIN ON OUR SPIN. 1012 01:06:16,288 --> 01:06:19,191 YEAH, WELL, DON'T YOU WORRY ABOUT THAT BECAUSE I'M GONNA SPIN 'EM RIGHT BACK. 1013 01:06:19,191 --> 01:06:20,643 I'M GONNA NAIL THAT ADAM FISHER, 1014 01:06:20,643 --> 01:06:22,144 AND THEN I'M GONNA NAIL THAT CHUCK CLOPPERMAN, TOO. 1015 01:06:22,645 --> 01:06:24,530 - GOOD! - ARE WE READY? 1016 01:06:24,530 --> 01:06:25,798 YEAH. 1017 01:06:25,798 --> 01:06:28,200 ARE WE GONNA WIN? OH, YEAH! 1018 01:06:28,200 --> 01:06:29,018 WHO'S YOUR HONOR? YOU'RE MY HONOR. 1019 01:06:29,485 --> 01:06:30,770 CALL ME YOUR HONOR. MY HONOR. 1020 01:06:31,237 --> 01:06:32,655 -YOURHONOR. - YOUR HONOR. 1021 01:06:32,655 --> 01:06:35,441 - YOUR HONOR! - YOUR HONOR. 1022 01:06:35,441 --> 01:06:37,226 ???? 1023 01:06:45,368 --> 01:06:47,353 ?? CAN I ROCK IT ?? 1024 01:06:47,353 --> 01:06:48,804 ?? CAN I KNOCK IT ?? 1025 01:06:48,804 --> 01:06:51,741 ?? CAN I LICK IT, CAN I KICK IT CAN I TOP IT ?? 1026 01:06:51,741 --> 01:06:54,744 ?? YOU MAKE ME HAZY YOU DRIVE ME CRAZY ?? 1027 01:06:55,244 --> 01:06:57,747 ?? AND MAYBE I DON'T KNOW WHAT I CAN DO ?? 1028 01:06:57,747 --> 01:06:58,748 ?? CAN I ROCK IT ?? 1029 01:06:59,248 --> 01:07:00,249 ?? CAN I KNOCK IT ?? 1030 01:07:00,750 --> 01:07:03,252 ?? CAN I LICK IT, CAN I KICK IT CAN I TOP IT ?? 1031 01:07:03,252 --> 01:07:06,756 ?? YOU MAKE ME HAZY YOU DRIVE ME CRAZY ?? 1032 01:07:06,756 --> 01:07:08,758 ?? AND MAYBE I DON'T KNOW WHAT I CAN DO ???? 1033 01:07:08,758 --> 01:07:10,259 WHOA! 1034 01:07:10,259 --> 01:07:12,695 [ Shouting ] 1035 01:07:13,195 --> 01:07:15,131 [ Amber ] FINALLY, THE TRIAL CAME. 1036 01:07:15,131 --> 01:07:18,100 ADAM ARRIVED AT THE COURTHOUSE TO A HERO'S WELCOME. 1037 01:07:31,547 --> 01:07:33,549 JESUS LOVES YOU! 1038 01:07:35,034 --> 01:07:38,537 LYDIA STONE WAS A BIT LESS FORTUNATE. 1039 01:07:39,038 --> 01:07:40,039 HELLO, GATLINERS. [ Booing ] 1040 01:07:40,039 --> 01:07:41,540 [ Woman ] GOD BLESS YOU, MS. STONE! 1041 01:07:41,540 --> 01:07:44,043 SISTER, HI, HOW ARE YOU? GOD BLESS YOU. 1042 01:07:44,043 --> 01:07:46,479 HE'LL BURN IN HELL! 1043 01:07:48,981 --> 01:07:50,916 [ Lydia ] WHAT THE HELL IS THIS? 1044 01:07:50,916 --> 01:07:53,352 DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT. THEY DON'T LOOK OLD ENOUGH TO VOTE ANYWAY. 1045 01:07:54,286 --> 01:07:56,238 OH, MY GOD. RUN FOR IT! 1046 01:08:01,227 --> 01:08:03,229 [ Amber ] WHEREAS THE ENTRANCES MIGHT'VE BEEN EXPECTED, 1047 01:08:03,229 --> 01:08:06,348 THE TRIAL WAS ANYTHING BUT. 1048 01:08:06,849 --> 01:08:09,685 YOU MAY PROCEED, MS. STONE. THANK YOU, YOUR HONOR. 1049 01:08:09,685 --> 01:08:11,687 HOW OLD ARE YOU, G.A.G.? 1050 01:08:11,687 --> 01:08:13,689 UH, MY BIRTHDAY IS NEXT WEEK. 1051 01:08:14,190 --> 01:08:16,192 UH, PLEASE JUST ANSWER THE QUESTION, SWEETIE. 1052 01:08:16,192 --> 01:08:18,461 OH. FIFTEEN AND A HALF. 1053 01:08:18,461 --> 01:08:21,797 FIFTEEN AND A HALF YEARS OLD. 1054 01:08:21,797 --> 01:08:23,999 AND, UH, DO YOU HAVE A BOYFRIEND? 1055 01:08:25,417 --> 01:08:27,236 YEAH, BUT HE'S IN PRISON. 1056 01:08:27,236 --> 01:08:30,172 I OBJECT, YOUR HONOR! SHE'S DOING A THING! 1057 01:08:30,172 --> 01:08:32,541 [ Judge ] OVERRULED. I AM NOT DOING A THING. 1058 01:08:32,541 --> 01:08:34,610 I'M-- OVERRULED. 1059 01:08:34,610 --> 01:08:37,379 WELL, SHE'S-- DOING A THING! I HAVE RULED! 1060 01:08:37,379 --> 01:08:39,715 I'M NOT DOING A THING. 1061 01:08:39,715 --> 01:08:42,218 PRISON, MISS G.A.G.? 1062 01:08:44,086 --> 01:08:47,006 UM, WELL-- [ Taps Desk ] 1063 01:08:47,940 --> 01:08:50,709 SINCE WE'VE BEEN RIPPED FROM EACH OTHER'S LIVES, 1064 01:08:50,709 --> 01:08:52,711 IT SEEMS LIKE WE'RE IN A TYPE OF PRISON. 1065 01:08:52,711 --> 01:08:54,947 I SEE. 1066 01:08:54,947 --> 01:08:57,333 ARE YOU CURRENTLY PREGNANT? 1067 01:08:57,333 --> 01:08:58,534 YES. 1068 01:08:58,968 --> 01:09:00,886 YES? 1069 01:09:00,886 --> 01:09:02,888 HOW TERRIBLY TRAGIC, ISN'T IT? 1070 01:09:02,888 --> 01:09:07,610 THAT A YOUNG GIRL DOES NOT HAVET HE CHANCE TO ENJOY HER TEENAGE YEARS. 1071 01:09:07,610 --> 01:09:09,545 BUT I AM ENJOYING MY TEENAGE YEARS. 1072 01:09:09,545 --> 01:09:11,413 HOW DO YOU THINK I GOT PREGNANT? 1073 01:09:11,413 --> 01:09:17,319 YOU KNOW, I'M SORRY, BUT I DON'T GET WHY EVERYONE IS SO INTERESTED IN ADAM AND ME. 1074 01:09:17,319 --> 01:09:20,623 I MEAN, YOU OLD PEOPLE DO SOME PRETTY SCREWED-UP STUFF. 1075 01:09:20,623 --> 01:09:22,825 I READ THOSE PAPERS IN LINE AT THE GROCERY STORE, 1076 01:09:23,225 --> 01:09:25,344 SO I KNOW WHAT I AM TALKING ABOUT. 1077 01:09:25,344 --> 01:09:29,248 I MEAN, PEOPLE ARE SNIFFING KOOL-AID AND HIRING TRANSVESTITE HOOKERS! 1078 01:09:29,248 --> 01:09:33,302 AND I'M NOT EVEN GOING TO MENTION THAT CIGAR THING, AND NOBODY CARES. 1079 01:09:33,302 --> 01:09:38,207 SO WHY IS EVERYONE GETTING INTO OUR FACES ABOUT GETTING IT ON A FEW TIMES? 1080 01:09:38,707 --> 01:09:40,209 I MEAN, I LIKE DOING IT. 1081 01:09:40,209 --> 01:09:42,678 AND MORE IMPORTANTLY, I WANTED TO DO IT. 1082 01:09:42,678 --> 01:09:47,249 AND... ADAM'S A REALLY NICE GUY. 1083 01:09:47,249 --> 01:09:49,251 NOT TO MENTION REALLY HUNG. OKAY, WELL, THEN! 1084 01:09:49,251 --> 01:09:50,653 THANK YOU, THANK YOU. 1085 01:09:50,653 --> 01:09:52,154 DONE WITH THIS ONE. THANK YOU, YOUR HONOR. 1086 01:09:52,154 --> 01:09:54,156 [ Judge ] MR. CLOPPERMAN, YOUR WITNESS. 1087 01:09:54,156 --> 01:09:55,658 THANK YOU. 1088 01:09:59,662 --> 01:10:01,163 HI. 1089 01:10:05,668 --> 01:10:08,170 HERE, HONEY. YOU MIGHT NEED THESE. 1090 01:10:14,560 --> 01:10:17,413 GINGER, ARE YOU IN LOVE-- PLEASE REFER TO OUR UNDERAGE WITNESS... 1091 01:10:17,413 --> 01:10:19,014 BY HER INITIALS, MR. CLOPPERMAN. 1092 01:10:22,067 --> 01:10:24,570 SORRY. 1093 01:10:24,570 --> 01:10:26,455 G.A.G., ARE YOU IN LOVE? 1094 01:10:26,956 --> 01:10:28,257 YES. 1095 01:10:30,626 --> 01:10:35,130 AND EVEN THOUGH YOU'RE, UH, 15 AND A HALF, 1096 01:10:35,130 --> 01:10:36,632 DON'T YOU FEEL LIKE AN ADULT? 1097 01:10:36,632 --> 01:10:38,133 OBJECTION, YOUR-- OBJECTION! 1098 01:10:38,634 --> 01:10:40,135 HELLO. SORRY. 1099 01:10:40,135 --> 01:10:42,471 LEADING THE WITNESS. SUSTAINED. 1100 01:10:43,889 --> 01:10:47,760 FINE. I WILL REPHRASE THE QUESTION, IF IT MAKES YOU HAPPY. 1101 01:10:47,760 --> 01:10:49,478 [ Chuckling ] 1102 01:10:51,480 --> 01:10:54,984 REPHRASE. UH-- 1103 01:10:54,984 --> 01:10:56,986 G.A.G. 1104 01:10:59,989 --> 01:11:03,993 AHEM. HOW DO YOU FEEL? 1105 01:11:03,993 --> 01:11:09,331 WELL, OTHER THAN SOME MORNING SICKNESS AND OCCASIONAL CONSTIPATION-- 1106 01:11:09,331 --> 01:11:11,817 - MENTALLY. - OH. 1107 01:11:11,817 --> 01:11:13,819 OLD. 1108 01:11:16,822 --> 01:11:17,823 OLD! 1109 01:11:17,823 --> 01:11:19,825 OLD. 1110 01:11:22,244 --> 01:11:25,147 NO FURTHER QUESTIONS, YOUR HONOR. YOU MAY STEP DOWN. 1111 01:11:25,147 --> 01:11:27,016 PLEASE CALL THE NEXT WITNESS. 1112 01:11:27,016 --> 01:11:28,450 MR. FISHER, I BELIEVE THAT'S YOU. 1113 01:11:28,450 --> 01:11:31,337 LET ME REMIND YOU, MR. FISHER, YOU ARE STILL UNDER OATH. 1114 01:11:31,837 --> 01:11:33,339 HE KNOWS. 1115 01:11:33,339 --> 01:11:35,574 IF YOU WOULD BE SO KIND. 1116 01:11:36,075 --> 01:11:38,077 Y-YES, SIR. 1117 01:11:43,082 --> 01:11:44,516 [ Chuckling ] 1118 01:11:44,516 --> 01:11:49,455 HELLO, MR. FISHER. SO YOU ADMIT TO SLEEPING WITH G.A.G. 1119 01:11:49,955 --> 01:11:50,956 YES, MA'AM. 1120 01:11:51,457 --> 01:11:56,011 ON MORE THAN THREE OCCASIONS BETWEEN OCTOBER 24 AND NOVEMBER 26? 1121 01:11:56,011 --> 01:11:57,746 WELL, A LOT MORE. 1122 01:11:58,247 --> 01:11:59,648 [ Laughter ] 1123 01:12:05,104 --> 01:12:07,222 AND WHAT WERE YOUR AGES AT THIS TIME? 1124 01:12:07,639 --> 01:12:08,524 I WAS 18. 1125 01:12:08,524 --> 01:12:13,128 18 YEARS OLD! 1126 01:12:13,128 --> 01:12:15,898 AND G.A.G.? 1127 01:12:15,898 --> 01:12:18,867 OH! DID I SAY SOMETHING FUNNY, MR. FISHER? 1128 01:12:18,867 --> 01:12:22,738 NO, MA'AM. I JUST REALIZED GINGER'S INITIALS SPELL-- 1129 01:12:23,172 --> 01:12:25,124 OH, EVERYONE KNOWS WHAT THEY SPELL, MR. FISHER. 1130 01:12:25,124 --> 01:12:29,128 I AM THROUGH WITH THIS YOUNG ADULT. THANK YOU, YOUR HONOR. 1131 01:12:29,128 --> 01:12:30,963 MR. CLOPPERMAN. 1132 01:12:30,963 --> 01:12:32,881 PRESENT! 1133 01:12:32,881 --> 01:12:34,883 [ Laughing ] 1134 01:12:37,319 --> 01:12:38,220 OH. 1135 01:12:42,324 --> 01:12:43,826 SO, UH, ADAM. 1136 01:12:43,826 --> 01:12:46,628 UH, YOU AND GINGER PLANNED TO MA-- [ Judge ] COUNSELOR! 1137 01:12:46,628 --> 01:12:48,580 THAT'S THE SECOND TIME. 1138 01:12:49,081 --> 01:12:50,949 WHAT? THAT'S THE THIRD TIME, YOUR HONOR. 1139 01:12:50,949 --> 01:12:52,951 NO, IT'S NOT. YOU'RE RIGHT. IT'S THE SECOND TIME. 1140 01:12:52,951 --> 01:12:54,903 NO, I'M RIGHT. IT'S THE THIRD TIME. 1141 01:12:54,903 --> 01:12:57,289 FINE, WHATEVER. ADAM, 1142 01:12:57,289 --> 01:13:00,826 YOU AND G.A.G., YOU PLAN TO MARRY, IS THAT RIGHT? 1143 01:13:00,826 --> 01:13:03,829 YES. WE LOVE EACH OTHER VERY MUCH, 1144 01:13:03,829 --> 01:13:06,832 AND WANT TO BE UNITED IN GOD'S EYES. 1145 01:13:06,832 --> 01:13:09,768 GOD'S EYES. 1146 01:13:11,270 --> 01:13:12,771 GOD'S... EYES. 1147 01:13:14,957 --> 01:13:17,242 SO WHY DID YOU TWO DECIDE NOT TO MARRY, ADAM? 1148 01:13:17,242 --> 01:13:20,562 UH, WE, UH-- 1149 01:13:21,914 --> 01:13:22,915 UH... 1150 01:13:22,915 --> 01:13:24,266 NO, WAIT. UH-- 1151 01:13:24,266 --> 01:13:27,603 - OBJECTION, YOUR HONOR! - OBJECTION TO HIS OBJECTION! 1152 01:13:27,603 --> 01:13:31,457 MR. CLOPPERMAN, YOU'RE DOING THE QUESTIONING. 1153 01:13:31,874 --> 01:13:33,325 I KNOW THAT. 1154 01:13:33,325 --> 01:13:34,743 WE DIDN'T! 1155 01:13:35,144 --> 01:13:36,562 WE-- WE DIDN'T. THAT'S RIGHT. 1156 01:13:36,562 --> 01:13:38,997 THE COURT ORDERED US TO BE PARTED, 1157 01:13:38,997 --> 01:13:40,999 AND WE CAN NO LONGER SEE EACH OTHER. 1158 01:13:40,999 --> 01:13:43,886 OUR TRUE LOVE WAS... SQUASHED. 1159 01:13:43,886 --> 01:13:47,873 - QUASHED. - YEAH. QUASHED. 1160 01:13:47,873 --> 01:13:52,227 HAVE YOU SEEN G.A.G. SINCE THE COURT TORE YOU APART? 1161 01:13:55,230 --> 01:13:56,215 N-NOT REALLY. 1162 01:13:56,215 --> 01:13:58,667 "NOT REALLY," YOUR HONOR? 1163 01:13:58,667 --> 01:14:01,904 ANSWER THE QUESTION EITHER YES OR NO. 1164 01:14:01,904 --> 01:14:04,873 NO... 1165 01:14:04,873 --> 01:14:05,874 TREALLY. 1166 01:14:05,874 --> 01:14:08,377 YOUR HONOR! "TREALLY"? 1167 01:14:08,377 --> 01:14:11,480 WILL YOU REPEAT YOUR ANSWER-- "TREALLY" MEANS "NO"! 1168 01:14:11,480 --> 01:14:13,515 JUST ONE WORD. 1169 01:14:19,505 --> 01:14:21,940 NO. 1170 01:14:21,940 --> 01:14:25,344 BUT... 1171 01:14:25,844 --> 01:14:28,347 BUT, WELL, I JUST WANT TO SAY THAT... 1172 01:14:28,347 --> 01:14:30,849 I KNOW THE PEOPLE WHO MAKE THE LAWS, 1173 01:14:31,350 --> 01:14:32,351 THEY HAVE THEIR REASONS AND ALL, 1174 01:14:32,351 --> 01:14:37,189 AND I'M USUALLY PRETTY GOOD AT NOT BREAKING THEM. 1175 01:14:37,189 --> 01:14:39,641 LOOK, WHAT I MEAN IS, 1176 01:14:39,641 --> 01:14:41,977 I GUESS I KINDA SCREWED UP, 1177 01:14:41,977 --> 01:14:44,480 AND... I'M SORRY ABOUT THAT. 1178 01:14:46,365 --> 01:14:49,368 WHEN MIKE MUBORN BLEW UP THE CHEMISTRY LAB TRYING TO BUILD DYNAMITE, 1179 01:14:49,368 --> 01:14:52,371 AND ALL HE HAD TO DO WAS PICK UP TRASH. 1180 01:14:52,371 --> 01:14:56,842 SO I THINK IT'D BE A LITTLE UNFAIR IF GET LOCKED AWAY FOR 20 TO 40. 1181 01:14:57,326 --> 01:14:58,277 DON'T YOU? 1182 01:14:58,777 --> 01:15:00,779 I DO! [ Laughs ] 1183 01:15:01,280 --> 01:15:03,232 ABSOLUTELY. 1184 01:15:03,232 --> 01:15:10,105 ADAM, G.A.G. HAS TESTIFIED THAT SHE IS PREGNANT WITH YOUR BABY. 1185 01:15:10,105 --> 01:15:12,407 ARE YOU GONNAA SUPPORT THAT CHILD? 1186 01:15:12,407 --> 01:15:15,210 YES. YES, I WILL. 1187 01:15:19,047 --> 01:15:21,550 THAT'S VERY NOT GUILTY OF YOU, ADAM. 1188 01:15:21,550 --> 01:15:23,952 YOUR HONOR, PLEASE! STRIKE THAT. 1189 01:15:23,952 --> 01:15:27,623 THE JURY WILL DISREGARD MR. CLOPPERMAN'S LAST COMMENT. 1190 01:15:30,509 --> 01:15:36,014 SORRY. I WAS JUST THINKING OUT LOUD. [ Laughs ] 1191 01:15:36,014 --> 01:15:38,016 NO MORE QUESTIONS, YOUR HONOR. 1192 01:15:38,517 --> 01:15:39,518 [ Judge ] YOU MAY STEP DOWN. 1193 01:15:40,018 --> 01:15:41,019 [ Adam ] YES, SIR. 1194 01:15:43,522 --> 01:15:45,173 BEFORE I SEND YOU TO DELIBERATE, 1195 01:15:45,173 --> 01:15:49,011 LET ME REMIND YOU NOT TO LET YOUR EMOTIONS AFFECT YOUR DECISION. 1196 01:15:49,011 --> 01:15:53,015 IF YOU THINK THAT ADAM FISHER COMMITTED THE ACT THREE TIMES WITH G.A.G... 1197 01:15:53,015 --> 01:15:55,217 BEFORE SHE REACHED THE AGE OF 16, 1198 01:15:55,217 --> 01:15:58,420 YOU MUST FIND HIM GUILTY. 1199 01:16:03,809 --> 01:16:08,697 [ Amber ] OKAY, SO MY BOYFRIEND KNOCKED UP AN UNDERAGED GIRL TWICE. 1200 01:16:08,697 --> 01:16:13,535 DOES THAT MEAN HE HAS TO SPEND MY CHILDBEARING YEARS BEHIND BARS? 1201 01:16:13,535 --> 01:16:15,887 I PRAYED THAT THE JURY WOULD SEE BEYOND THE HYPE, 1202 01:16:15,887 --> 01:16:20,392 THE SENSATIONALISM, THE CHEAP, TAWDRY DETAILS OF ADAM'S INDISCRETION... 1203 01:16:20,392 --> 01:16:23,395 AND SEE HIS INNOCENT, GIVING SOUL. 1204 01:16:23,395 --> 01:16:24,863 WE ALL NERVOUSLY AWAITED THE VERDICT. 1205 01:16:24,863 --> 01:16:28,367 ?? AN ARTIFICIAL SEASON ?? 1206 01:16:31,219 --> 01:16:35,641 ?? COVERED BY SUMMER RAIN ?? 1207 01:16:38,577 --> 01:16:44,466 ?? LOSIN' ALL MY REASON ?? 1208 01:16:44,933 --> 01:16:48,153 ?? 'CAUSE THERE'S NOTHIN' LEFT TO BLAME ?? 1209 01:16:54,276 --> 01:16:56,495 WELL, HE ADMITTED SLEEPING WITH HER, RIGHT? MM-HMM. 1210 01:16:56,495 --> 01:16:58,163 AND SHE ADMITTED SHE WAS 15. 1211 01:16:58,163 --> 01:17:01,750 AND HE ADMITTED HE WAS 18, SO... HE'S GUILTY. 1212 01:17:01,750 --> 01:17:03,752 HE'S GUILTY. 1213 01:17:05,354 --> 01:17:09,641 ?? SHADOWS PAINT THE SIDEWALK ?? 1214 01:17:11,643 --> 01:17:15,147 ?? A LIVING PICTURE IN A FRAME ?? 1215 01:17:19,151 --> 01:17:22,654 ?? SEE THE SEA OF PEOPLE ?? 1216 01:17:25,157 --> 01:17:28,660 ?? ALL THEIR FACES LOOK THE SAME ?? 1217 01:17:32,164 --> 01:17:38,170 ?? SO I SAT DOWN FOR A WHILE ?? 1218 01:17:38,170 --> 01:17:40,489 ?? FORCING A SMILE ???? 1219 01:17:44,092 --> 01:17:46,461 [ Amber ] ADAM WAS ALWAYS TRYING TO DO THE RIGHT THING. 1220 01:17:46,461 --> 01:17:49,348 HE WAS INCAPABLE OF DOING ANYTHING ELSE. 1221 01:17:49,348 --> 01:17:52,167 HE WAS CRYING OUT FOR HELP. 1222 01:17:52,167 --> 01:17:55,087 BUT SOMETIMES... [ Knocking ] 1223 01:17:55,487 --> 01:17:57,889 THE DISTANCE YOU HAVE TO WALK TO ANSWER A DOOR... 1224 01:17:57,889 --> 01:18:01,343 IS JUST TOO FAR TO GO TO HELP SOMEONE. 1225 01:18:04,346 --> 01:18:06,565 REV, ARE YOU IN THERE? 1226 01:18:06,565 --> 01:18:09,418 THAT DOOR IS JUST... TOO DAMN FAR. 1227 01:18:09,818 --> 01:18:13,822 THIS IS STUPID. WHO HERE HASN'T HAD SEX WITH A HIGH SCHOOL SOPHOMORE? 1228 01:18:13,822 --> 01:18:15,791 I SURE HAVE. 1229 01:18:16,291 --> 01:18:18,293 WELL, I MEAN, WHEN WE WERE IN HIGH SCHOOL. 1230 01:18:18,293 --> 01:18:19,795 RIGHT. RIGHT. 1231 01:18:55,397 --> 01:18:56,998 WILL THE DEFENDANT PLEASE RISE? 1232 01:19:01,853 --> 01:19:04,890 THIS COURT FINDS THE DEFENDANT GUILTY AS CHARGED. 1233 01:19:06,208 --> 01:19:08,210 SENTENCING TOMORROW AT 3:00. 1234 01:19:11,580 --> 01:19:14,583 MAN! 1235 01:19:14,583 --> 01:19:16,084 THAT TOTALLY SUCKED! 1236 01:19:16,084 --> 01:19:19,387 GUILTY? GUILTY? AL, LOOK, IT'SINSIDE SCOOP. 1237 01:19:19,387 --> 01:19:22,591 TV. IS MY FOREHEAD SHINY? 1238 01:19:23,024 --> 01:19:24,960 YOU SAID YOU COULD GET HIM OFF, NO PROBLEM! 1239 01:19:24,960 --> 01:19:28,163 THAT'S THE LAST TIME I HIRE A LAWYER OFF TV! 1240 01:19:28,563 --> 01:19:29,998 NO PROBLEM! NO PROBLEM! 1241 01:19:30,398 --> 01:19:32,400 THE LORD TELLS US TO TURN THE OTHER CHEEK. 1242 01:19:32,400 --> 01:19:34,002 WELL, SCREW THAT! 1243 01:19:34,453 --> 01:19:35,954 JUSTICE WAS SERVED. I KICKED ASS! 1244 01:19:36,371 --> 01:19:39,174 I WON! I WON! I'M GONNA BE MAYOR NOW! 1245 01:19:39,174 --> 01:19:42,477 VOTE FOR STONE. THANKS TO ME, WE'RE GONNA BE MAYOR. 1246 01:19:42,477 --> 01:19:44,763 VOTE FOR STONE. 1247 01:19:44,763 --> 01:19:46,765 WAIT A MINUTE. WHAT ABOUT ME? 1248 01:19:46,765 --> 01:19:49,267 WHAT ABOUT THE WHITE PICKET FENCE, 1249 01:19:49,267 --> 01:19:52,771 THE DINNER PARTIES, THE MINIVAN? 1250 01:19:52,771 --> 01:19:57,692 IF HE GOES TO PRISON, I MAY NOT LOSE MY VIRGINITY FOR 40 YEARS! 1251 01:20:01,146 --> 01:20:03,148 [ Amber ] THEY ACTED LIKE HE WAS A MARTYR, 1252 01:20:03,148 --> 01:20:06,151 LIKE JOHN THE BAPTIST OR KURT COBAIN. 1253 01:20:06,151 --> 01:20:10,655 THAT'S WHEN I BEGAN TO WONDER IF WAITING TO LOSE MY VIRGINITY WAS SILLY... 1254 01:20:10,655 --> 01:20:14,659 WHEN I HAD A REAL-LIFE MARTYR FOR A BOYFRIEND! 1255 01:20:14,659 --> 01:20:18,663 A FUZZY PIG AND A PRAYER FOR A PREDATOR. 1256 01:20:18,663 --> 01:20:21,666 ADAM FISHER STANDS TO RECEIVE UP TO 40 YEARS IN PRISON... 1257 01:20:22,167 --> 01:20:25,170 AND WILL BE FORCED TO REGISTER AS A SEXUAL PREDATOR... 1258 01:20:25,170 --> 01:20:26,671 FOR THE REST OF HIS LIFE. 1259 01:20:26,671 --> 01:20:28,673 THE WHOLE COUNTRY'S PRAYERS ARE WITH ADAM FISHER, 1260 01:20:28,673 --> 01:20:33,178 WHO, NO DOUBT, TONIGHT IS SPENDING THE EVENING IN QUIET CONTEMPLATION. 1261 01:20:35,263 --> 01:20:39,000 I WONDER IF THEY'LL LET YOU COME HAVE SEX WITH ME IF I GO TO PRISON. 1262 01:20:39,434 --> 01:20:41,920 LET'S NOT EVEN THINK ABOUT THAT. 1263 01:20:41,920 --> 01:20:47,425 WELL, IF NOT, THIS MIGHT BE OUR LAST CHANCE TO BE TOGETHER FOR A LONG TIME. 1264 01:20:47,425 --> 01:20:48,793 YEAH. 1265 01:20:48,793 --> 01:20:53,381 MAYBE WE SHOULD MAKE THE MOST OF WHAT LITTLE TIME WE HAVE LEFT. 1266 01:20:53,381 --> 01:20:55,584 I WANT IT TO BE MAGICAL, 1267 01:20:55,584 --> 01:20:58,136 AN EXPERIENCE YOU'LL REMEMBER FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE. 1268 01:20:58,136 --> 01:20:59,588 ADAM-- 1269 01:21:04,476 --> 01:21:08,980 [ Mrs. Fisher ] DINNER WILL BE READY IN FIVE MINUTES! 1270 01:21:08,980 --> 01:21:11,650 THAT GIVES US PLENTY OF TIME. [ Giggles ] 1271 01:21:15,654 --> 01:21:17,656 [ Amber ] YES, I GAVE MYSELF TO ADAM... 1272 01:21:17,656 --> 01:21:20,158 ON THE NIGHT BEFORE HIS SENTENCING. 1273 01:21:20,158 --> 01:21:24,663 I SPENT THE REST OF THE NIGHT TRYING TO REMEMBER IF I WAS OVULATING. 1274 01:21:51,873 --> 01:21:55,010 [ Bailiff ] ALL RISE! 1275 01:21:55,010 --> 01:21:58,013 GATLIN COUNTY SUPERIOR COURT IS NOW IN SESSION. 1276 01:21:58,446 --> 01:22:01,650 THE HONORABLE JUDGE RAYMOND E. ZIFF PRESIDING. 1277 01:22:01,650 --> 01:22:03,802 YOU MAY BE SEATED. 1278 01:22:08,223 --> 01:22:10,809 [ Judge ] WILL THE DEFENDANT PLEASE RISE? 1279 01:22:12,193 --> 01:22:16,998 THIS COURT IN NO WAY CONDONES UNDERAGE SEXUAL RELATIONS. 1280 01:22:16,998 --> 01:22:19,401 HOWEVER, I FIND MYSELF HARD PRESSED... 1281 01:22:19,401 --> 01:22:21,403 TO SEND THE DEFENDANT UP THE RIVER FOR 40 YEARS... 1282 01:22:21,803 --> 01:22:23,405 BECAUSE HE GOT LUCKY WITH HIS GIRLFRIEND. 1283 01:22:25,006 --> 01:22:28,310 THEREFORE, MR. FISHER, I AM SENTENCING YOU TO TWO YEARS... 1284 01:22:28,310 --> 01:22:31,680 PROBATION. 1285 01:22:32,113 --> 01:22:35,850 AND AS FOR THAT REQUIREMENT THAT YOU REGISTER AS A SEXUAL PREDATOR, 1286 01:22:35,850 --> 01:22:38,403 IT'S REQUIRED BY THE STATUTE, 1287 01:22:38,403 --> 01:22:42,090 SO I'M AFRAID THAT MY HANDS ARE TIED. 1288 01:22:42,090 --> 01:22:43,758 BUT GOOD LUCK, ADAM. 1289 01:22:45,360 --> 01:22:49,681 I WANT TO THANK THE COMMUNITY FOR THEIR INCREDIBLE SUPPORT... 1290 01:22:50,181 --> 01:22:51,182 AND THAT JUDGE, TOO. 1291 01:22:51,182 --> 01:22:52,684 OKAY, I'M GONNA THROW IT OVER TO ADAM HERE. 1292 01:22:53,184 --> 01:22:55,186 HE'S GOING TO TAKE A FEW QUESTIONS BEFORE I GIVE YOU ANY MORE DETAILS... 1293 01:22:55,687 --> 01:22:58,189 ABOUT MY BOOK SIGNING TOUR. [ Reporters Yelling ] 1294 01:22:58,189 --> 01:23:01,693 HOW DOES IT FEEL TO HAVE TO REGISTER AS A SEXUAL PREDATOR FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE? 1295 01:23:02,193 --> 01:23:03,695 WELL, IT KINDA SUCKS. 1296 01:23:03,695 --> 01:23:06,197 I MEAN, NOW I WON'T BE ABLE TO COACH KIDS' BASEBALL... 1297 01:23:06,197 --> 01:23:09,701 OR BUY A GUN OR BE THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES. 1298 01:23:09,701 --> 01:23:11,703 HOW DO YOU AND GINGER PLAN TO CELEBRATE YOUR FREEDOM... 1299 01:23:11,703 --> 01:23:14,205 AND WHEN DO YOU PLAN ON GETTING MARRIED? 1300 01:23:14,205 --> 01:23:17,208 WELL, GINGER AND I KIND OF BROKE UP. 1301 01:23:20,211 --> 01:23:23,715 THAT'S ALL THE TIME THAT HE HAS FOR-- FOR YOU GUYS RIGHT NOW, 1302 01:23:23,715 --> 01:23:28,219 BUT I GOT LOTS OF TIME, SO, UH, LET'S GET IT ON. 1303 01:23:28,219 --> 01:23:31,723 OKAY, SO THE TITLE OF MY BOOK ISUNLAWFUL ENTRY: THE ADAM FISHER STORY. 1304 01:23:31,723 --> 01:23:34,225 IF ORDER ONE RIGHT NOW, YOU'LL GET A SPECIAL COPY OF MY WORKOUT VIDEO... 1305 01:23:34,225 --> 01:23:36,661 HOW TO GET GREAT ABS IN JUST THREE HEARINGS. 1306 01:23:37,162 --> 01:23:38,163 [ Amber ] WITH THE WHOLE MESS BEHIND US, 1307 01:23:38,663 --> 01:23:40,165 ADAM AND I CAN GET OUR LIVES BACK... 1308 01:23:40,165 --> 01:23:42,667 AND ENJOY EVEN DEEPER TRUE LOVE. 1309 01:23:42,667 --> 01:23:47,172 SEE, SWEETIE, I WAS THINKING MAYBE WE COULD GO BACK TO MY PLACE... 1310 01:23:47,172 --> 01:23:49,174 AND CELEBRATE YOUR VICTORY. 1311 01:23:49,174 --> 01:23:52,677 JEEZ, I DON'T KNOW. I'VE KINDA BEEN THINKING, TOO. 1312 01:23:52,677 --> 01:23:55,180 I'LL HAVE YOUR BABY! I'M 16! 1313 01:23:55,180 --> 01:23:57,682 I LOVE YOU, ADAM! I WANNA HAVE YOUR BABY! 1314 01:23:57,682 --> 01:24:00,185 MARRY ME, ADAM, I LOVE YOU! 1315 01:24:00,185 --> 01:24:03,188 WHAT DO YOU SORT OF THINK ABOUT SEEING OTHER PEOPLE? 1316 01:24:05,190 --> 01:24:08,193 [ Girls Screaming ] 1317 01:24:08,193 --> 01:24:10,195 [ Amber ] SOMEWHERE DEEP DOWN, 1318 01:24:10,195 --> 01:24:12,197 I KNOW HE REALLY COULDN'T MEAN THAT. 1319 01:24:12,197 --> 01:24:14,699 HE WAS JUST IN SHOCK FROM THE TRIAL. 1320 01:24:14,699 --> 01:24:16,701 HE LOVES ME TOO MUCH TO SEE OTHER PEOPLE. 1321 01:24:17,202 --> 01:24:19,687 [ Screaming ] I JUST HAD TO REMIND HIM. 1322 01:24:23,041 --> 01:24:25,510 ?? I DON'T BELIEVE WHAT HE SAID ?? 1323 01:24:25,510 --> 01:24:27,512 ?? I CAN GO ANYWHERE ?? 1324 01:24:27,512 --> 01:24:29,514 ?? I CAN HOLD MY HEAD UP ?? 1325 01:24:30,014 --> 01:24:32,016 ?? I CAN BREATHE IN THE AIR ?? 1326 01:24:32,016 --> 01:24:34,519 ?? I'M NOT OFFICIALLY DEAD ?? 1327 01:24:34,519 --> 01:24:36,521 ?? I STILL HAVE A HEART ?? 1328 01:24:36,521 --> 01:24:39,023 ?? NOT OFFICIALLY DEAD, YEAH ?? 1329 01:24:39,023 --> 01:24:41,860 ?? I STILL HAVE A HEART ?? 1330 01:24:42,360 --> 01:24:43,862 [ Amber ] I MAY HAVE GONE ABOUT IT BADLY, 1331 01:24:44,362 --> 01:24:48,299 BUT WHAT'S IMPORTANT IN THE END IS THAT WE LEARN FROM OUR MISTAKES... 1332 01:24:48,299 --> 01:24:50,301 AND GROW AS INDIVIDUALS. 1333 01:24:50,301 --> 01:24:53,805 ? ?? I REMEMBER THE TIMES YOU'D RIDE YOUR BIKE PAST MY HOUSE ? 1334 01:24:53,805 --> 01:24:55,774 ?? I WANNA KNOW YOU SO BAD ?? 1335 01:24:56,274 --> 01:24:58,276 ?? KNOW YOU INSIDE AND OUT ?? 1336 01:24:58,276 --> 01:25:00,779 ?? YOU'RE OFFICIALLY DEAD ?? 1337 01:25:00,779 --> 01:25:02,280 ?? YOU DON'T HAVE A HEART ???? 1338 01:25:02,280 --> 01:25:05,416 ???? [ Piano ] 1339 01:25:27,522 --> 01:25:30,525 AH! OOH! 1340 01:25:30,525 --> 01:25:32,527 MY! 1341 01:25:33,745 --> 01:25:35,396 [ Amber ] ANYHOW, YOU'RE PROBABLY WONDERING... 1342 01:25:35,396 --> 01:25:37,799 WHAT HAPPENED TO EVERYONE AFTER THE TRIAL. 1343 01:25:37,799 --> 01:25:41,653 [ Ginger Screaming ] 1344 01:25:42,153 --> 01:25:44,656 [ Grunting ] 1345 01:25:45,140 --> 01:25:46,741 [ Baby Crying ] 1346 01:25:47,142 --> 01:25:50,094 [ Amber ] AFTER A COUNTY RECORD OF 98 HOURS OF LABOR, 1347 01:25:50,094 --> 01:25:52,597 GINGER PRODUCED A BABY GIRL, 1348 01:25:52,597 --> 01:25:55,600 THUS PROVING THAT SHE'S NOT ALWAYS EASY. 1349 01:25:57,602 --> 01:25:59,604 GINGER, CAN I TOUCH IT? 1350 01:25:59,604 --> 01:26:01,105 NO WAY! HUSH, JOHNNY! 1351 01:26:01,606 --> 01:26:04,609 GINGER'S MINE NOW, ASS WIPE! HE MEANS THE BABY. 1352 01:26:04,609 --> 01:26:06,611 [ Crying ] 1353 01:26:07,111 --> 01:26:09,113 SHH SHH SHH! HERE, BABY, COME HERE. 1354 01:26:09,113 --> 01:26:12,116 GIVE IT TO JOHNNY. GIVE IT TO JOHNNY. 1355 01:26:12,116 --> 01:26:14,619 THERE YOU GO. 1356 01:26:14,619 --> 01:26:16,120 WHAT'S ITS NAME? 1357 01:26:16,120 --> 01:26:19,557 WE DECIDED TO NAME HER "T-BONE" AFTER JOHNNY'S CELLMATE. 1358 01:26:19,557 --> 01:26:21,059 [ Crying Continues ] OH, WAIT, WHAT'D I DO? 1359 01:26:21,059 --> 01:26:26,531 HERE, HERE. YOU'RE JUST HOLDING HER WRONG. 1360 01:26:27,015 --> 01:26:29,083 [ Ginger ] JOHNNY KNOWS ALL ABOUT BABIES. 1361 01:26:29,083 --> 01:26:31,452 HIS SISTER HAD A COUPLE BACK IN JUNIOR HIGH, 1362 01:26:31,452 --> 01:26:33,454 AND HE HELPED TAKE CARE OF THEM. PUT YOUR HAND HERE. 1363 01:26:33,955 --> 01:26:37,458 HE'S GONNA BE A GREAT DADDY. THERE YOU GO. 1364 01:26:37,458 --> 01:26:39,961 THERE YOU GO. [ Laughs ] 1365 01:26:39,961 --> 01:26:42,463 YEAH. YEAH. 1366 01:26:42,463 --> 01:26:44,732 [ Amber ] ALTHOUGH LYDIA LOST THE ELECTION, 1367 01:26:44,732 --> 01:26:48,937 HER NEWLY FOUND CELEBRITY LANDED HER A TALK SHOW ON CNBC, 1368 01:26:49,337 --> 01:26:51,339 WHICH WAS CANCELED AFTER SIX SHOWS. 1369 01:26:51,739 --> 01:26:55,476 SHE FOUND A BETTER OUTLET FOR HER TALENTS ON THE HOME BUYING CHANNEL. 1370 01:26:55,476 --> 01:26:57,545 DON'T FORGET TO ORDER THIS LIMITED EDITION... 1371 01:26:57,946 --> 01:26:59,397 ADAM AND GINGER DINNER PLATE SET. 1372 01:26:59,898 --> 01:27:02,183 THAT'S RIGHT, LYDIA. THIS IS VERY INTERESTING. 1373 01:27:02,183 --> 01:27:03,785 THE PAINTING THAT YOU'RE LOOKING AT HERE... 1374 01:27:03,785 --> 01:27:06,187 IS BAKED RIGHT IN SO IT WON'T CHIP OR FADE. 1375 01:27:06,588 --> 01:27:08,273 [ Lydia ] MM-HMM. THESE ARE A MUST-HAVE. 1376 01:27:08,273 --> 01:27:11,109 AN EXCELLENT BARGAIN, AND DISHWASHER-SAFE AS WELL. 1377 01:27:11,109 --> 01:27:15,730 WE HARDLY HAVE ANY LEFT, SO GET ON THAT PHONE AND CALL 555-LONG. 1378 01:27:15,730 --> 01:27:17,732 I HAVE SOME OF THESE AT HOME, CHUCK. 1379 01:27:20,585 --> 01:27:23,087 [ Amber ] ADAM DID DROP OUT OF SCHOOL BEFORE GRADUATION, 1380 01:27:23,087 --> 01:27:25,590 AND ONCE AGAIN FOUND HIMSELF AT THE LITTLE CHICKEN. 1381 01:27:26,090 --> 01:27:27,592 HE HAD A FEW LEGAL BILLS. 1382 01:27:27,592 --> 01:27:31,596 AND LET'S FACE IT-- SCHOOL WAS JUST NEVER HIS THING. 1383 01:27:34,599 --> 01:27:36,584 [ Whistling ] [ Amber ] IT WASN'T LONG... 1384 01:27:36,584 --> 01:27:39,587 BEFORE ANOTHER BABY GOT STUCK IN A PIPE SOMEWHERE-- 1385 01:27:39,587 --> 01:27:41,089 ARKANSAS, I THINK-- 1386 01:27:41,089 --> 01:27:44,092 SO THE PRESS ESCAPED OUR SMALL, PICTURESQUE TOWN, 1387 01:27:44,092 --> 01:27:47,595 AND ADAM'S PARENTS QUICKLY FOUND THEMSELVES BACK TO NORMAL. 1388 01:27:47,595 --> 01:27:50,098 AL? 1389 01:27:50,098 --> 01:27:52,600 IT'S BLUE. 1390 01:27:55,103 --> 01:27:57,605 [ Amber ] WELL, ALMOST. 1391 01:28:00,608 --> 01:28:02,110 OH, MY. 1392 01:28:02,110 --> 01:28:05,697 AS FOR ME, 1393 01:28:05,697 --> 01:28:08,700 WELL, I'M DOING JUST FINE. 1394 01:28:11,636 --> 01:28:13,638 AFTER THE LITTLE INCIDENT WITH ADAM'S CAR, 1395 01:28:14,138 --> 01:28:18,643 I AGREED TO MAKE A FEW SPEECHES AT LOCAL JUNIOR HIGH SCHOOLS ON THE DANGERS OF TEEN SEX. 1396 01:28:19,143 --> 01:28:21,646 I'M A VERY GIVING PERSON. 1397 01:28:21,646 --> 01:28:23,648 I AM. 1398 01:28:25,149 --> 01:28:26,651 [ Amber Narrating ] AFTER ALL WE WENT THROUGH, 1399 01:28:26,651 --> 01:28:31,155 WE PATCHED THINGS UP AND EMERGED CLOSER THAN EVER. 1400 01:28:31,656 --> 01:28:33,157 IT TOOK A LITTLE NUDGING ON MY PART, 1401 01:28:33,157 --> 01:28:36,160 BUT EVENTUALLY I GOT ADAM TO POP THE QUESTION. 1402 01:28:36,160 --> 01:28:38,162 HAPPIEST DAY OF MY LIFE. 1403 01:28:53,895 --> 01:28:56,931 [ Amber ] ADAM STILL HAD SOME GROWING UP TO DO, 1404 01:28:56,931 --> 01:28:59,434 BUT I'M LEARNING TO BE PATIENT. 1405 01:28:59,934 --> 01:29:03,905 WE'RE GOING TO BE TOGETHER FOR A LONG, 1406 01:29:03,905 --> 01:29:06,824 LONG TIME. 1407 01:29:06,824 --> 01:29:07,825 ADAM! 1408 01:29:07,825 --> 01:29:12,263 SO YOU SEE, STORIES DO HAVE HAPPY ENDINGS. 1409 01:29:12,263 --> 01:29:14,699 NO, REALLY! THEY DO! 1410 01:29:18,202 --> 01:29:20,204 HERE, BABE. 1411 01:29:20,204 --> 01:29:22,206 THANKS, BABE. 1412 01:29:23,708 --> 01:29:26,210 LET ME JUST GET THESE HANDLEBARS FOR YOU. 1413 01:29:32,717 --> 01:29:34,719 ?? I GUESS WE'VE HAD OUR FUN ?? 1414 01:29:35,219 --> 01:29:37,188 ?? BUT IT SEEMS THE FUN IS OVER NOW ?? 1415 01:29:37,188 --> 01:29:39,690 ?? AND THAT'S ALL RIGHT ?? 1416 01:29:39,690 --> 01:29:42,193 ?? IT'S ALL RIGHT ?? 1417 01:29:57,024 --> 01:30:00,411 I CALLED YOU A BITCH, WHICH YOU MOST DEFINITELY ARE! 1418 01:30:01,779 --> 01:30:04,782 [ Giggling ] 1419 01:30:10,671 --> 01:30:14,525 HOW DO YOU-- HOW-- HOW DO YOU FEEL? 1420 01:30:15,026 --> 01:30:18,362 OTHER THAN MORNING SICKNESS AND OCCASIONAL CONSTIPATION-- 1421 01:30:18,362 --> 01:30:21,849 I KNOW ALL ABOUT THAT, BUT MENTALLY. 1422 01:30:21,849 --> 01:30:23,701 HELLO? 1423 01:30:38,933 --> 01:30:41,352 [ Judge ] MR. FISHER, WOULD YOU BE SO KIND? 1424 01:30:41,352 --> 01:30:42,854 YES, SIR. 1425 01:30:44,272 --> 01:30:47,158 - CUT! - SHE LOVES HER CORN. 1426 01:30:47,658 --> 01:30:50,661 WHAT HAND ARE YOU COUNTING ON? SECOND TIME. 1427 01:30:50,661 --> 01:30:52,663 THIRD TIME. SHUT UP. 1428 01:30:54,065 --> 01:30:57,502 WHERE YOU GOING? 1429 01:30:58,002 --> 01:31:00,004 I'M GONNA DO THE DANCE WITH THE JUG-EARED MAN. 1430 01:31:00,004 --> 01:31:01,472 FORGOT TO FLOSS. 1431 01:31:01,973 --> 01:31:03,941 I'M GONNA BEAT OFF. 1432 01:31:03,941 --> 01:31:05,943 THAT'S NICE, DEAR. 1433 01:31:21,242 --> 01:31:24,462 OKAY, I OBJECT, YOUR HONOR! HE'S LEADING HIMSELF! 1434 01:31:24,462 --> 01:31:27,965 I'M SORRY, I-- WE NEED TO STOP FOR A SECOND. 1435 01:31:27,965 --> 01:31:30,368 ALL RIGHT, I'M LACTATING AND I'M LEAKING RIGHT NOW. 1436 01:31:30,368 --> 01:31:33,337 PARTY ANIMAL. 1437 01:31:33,337 --> 01:31:35,523 [ Judge ] YOU'RE ASKING THE QUESTION. 1438 01:31:36,007 --> 01:31:39,443 THANK YOU, YOUR HONOR. I KNOW. 1439 01:31:39,927 --> 01:31:43,397 AND ALL HE GOT WAS TO PICK OUT-- ALL HE HAD TO DO WAS PICK UP TRASH. 1440 01:31:44,899 --> 01:31:46,868 LOOK, EITHER LOVE THE LITTLE TRAMP, 1441 01:31:46,868 --> 01:31:49,086 OR YOU'RE GONNA BE GETTING SOME TOUGH LOVE... 1442 01:31:49,086 --> 01:31:51,239 FROM YOUR CELLMATE UP AT THE STATE PEN. 1443 01:31:51,739 --> 01:31:54,992 SOAP ON A ROPE SO YOU CAN GET IT BACK. GOT IT? 1444 01:32:09,824 --> 01:32:14,078 WHAT THE HECK YOU TALKING ABOUT? IT'S A HYGIENE THING, HONEY. 1445 01:32:16,430 --> 01:32:19,934 UH, IT'S A WORKOUT METAPHOR. 1446 01:32:19,934 --> 01:32:22,803 [ No Audible Dialogue ] 1447 01:32:25,306 --> 01:32:27,241 HI. 1448 01:32:49,931 --> 01:32:52,300 I WANNA TRY OUT MY NEW WATER PIK. 1449 01:32:52,300 --> 01:32:53,968 YOU'RE MY HONOR. CALL ME YOUR HONOR. 1450 01:32:53,968 --> 01:32:58,339 [ Adam ] THERE'S ULTIMATE FIGHTING ON PAY-PER-VIEW TONIGHT. 1451 01:32:58,339 --> 01:33:00,174 OH. OH, YEAH? 1452 01:33:00,675 --> 01:33:02,026 YOU ANYBODY'S BITCH YET? 1453 01:33:02,026 --> 01:33:03,844 - WHAT? - SOUND GOOD? 1454 01:33:06,397 --> 01:33:08,015 - COOL. - NO PROBLEM. 1455 01:33:28,102 --> 01:33:30,955 W-WE CAN'T DO IT ANYMORE? 1456 01:33:30,955 --> 01:33:33,541 I CAN'T DO IT ANYMORE? 1457 01:33:35,409 --> 01:33:36,911 WE CAN'T DO IT ANYMORE? 1458 01:33:36,911 --> 01:33:37,828 WELL, FOLKS-- 1459 01:33:38,312 --> 01:33:40,281 WAS YOUR BED GOOD, HONEY? 1460 01:33:41,716 --> 01:33:43,217 HAVE YOU BEEN BONING HER AGAIN? 1461 01:33:43,217 --> 01:33:45,720 OH, NO. 1462 01:33:47,388 --> 01:33:49,507 [ Giggling ]