1 00:00:06,540 --> 00:00:07,708 JOHN: David, what are you doing? 2 00:00:07,774 --> 00:00:08,975 DAVID: Shut up. Dude, just shut up. 3 00:00:09,042 --> 00:00:10,577 Just wait. 4 00:00:10,644 --> 00:00:12,012 Ahh... 5 00:00:12,078 --> 00:00:14,080 ahh‐ahh... 6 00:00:14,147 --> 00:00:15,248 Oh, no, you're doing that thing. 7 00:00:15,315 --> 00:00:16,550 It's not working. You know, back in the day, 8 00:00:16,617 --> 00:00:18,519 if you held a slice of cafeteria pizza like this, 9 00:00:18,585 --> 00:00:20,453 everything would slide off into your mouth like a mudslide. 10 00:00:20,521 --> 00:00:21,454 It was delicious. 11 00:00:21,522 --> 00:00:22,856 The gastronomy club petitioned them 12 00:00:22,923 --> 00:00:23,990 to use better tomato paste. 13 00:00:24,057 --> 00:00:25,425 Oh, there you go. 14 00:00:25,491 --> 00:00:27,227 Sustained activism is the key to social progress. 15 00:00:27,293 --> 00:00:28,629 Well, you ruined pizza chugging. 16 00:00:28,695 --> 00:00:29,630 Congratulations. 17 00:00:29,696 --> 00:00:30,797 Okay, look, we're not technically 18 00:00:30,864 --> 00:00:32,065 supposed to be on school property at all, 19 00:00:32,132 --> 00:00:33,166 so let's get down to it. 20 00:00:33,233 --> 00:00:34,234 How can we help you? 21 00:00:34,300 --> 00:00:35,602 Have y'all ever heard of Party Pines? 22 00:00:35,669 --> 00:00:37,538 Kids party there on the weekend. 23 00:00:37,604 --> 00:00:39,072 Oh, yes. 24 00:00:39,139 --> 00:00:41,508 Yes, we're familiar with Party Pines. 25 00:00:41,575 --> 00:00:43,043 ‐Really? ‐What are your names again? 26 00:00:43,109 --> 00:00:44,477 ‐He's Colin. ‐She's Phoebe. 27 00:00:44,545 --> 00:00:45,946 All right, Phoebe and Colin, 28 00:00:46,012 --> 00:00:47,080 I'ma put y'all up on some history. 29 00:00:47,147 --> 00:00:50,517 I tapped the first‐ever keg at Party Pines. 30 00:00:50,584 --> 00:00:52,485 Me and my bros founded that place. 31 00:00:52,553 --> 00:00:54,154 It's like going up to Christopher Columbus 32 00:00:54,220 --> 00:00:55,922 and saying, "Oh, have you heard about this place? 33 00:00:55,989 --> 00:00:57,323 "It's really great. It's called America. 34 00:00:57,390 --> 00:00:58,692 I think you would like it." He's like, 35 00:00:58,759 --> 00:01:01,261 "Yeah, I know all about it. I'm the one who invented it." 36 00:01:01,327 --> 00:01:02,295 ‐Why that acc‐‐ ‐'Cause he's Italian. 37 00:01:02,362 --> 00:01:03,496 ‐Oh, God. ‐Yeah. 38 00:01:03,564 --> 00:01:05,198 So you're Christopher Columbus? 39 00:01:05,265 --> 00:01:07,000 Yeah, if he did upside‐down beer bongs 40 00:01:07,067 --> 00:01:09,135 on a sick‐ass tire swing he built himself. 41 00:01:09,202 --> 00:01:12,773 So you're okay having the blood of genocide on your hands? 42 00:01:12,839 --> 00:01:14,074 Uh, it rules, obviously. 43 00:01:14,140 --> 00:01:15,275 I got a holiday out of it. 44 00:01:15,341 --> 00:01:16,409 ‐Okay, that's‐‐ ‐I win. 45 00:01:16,476 --> 00:01:17,778 ‐All right, Howard Zinn, let's, uh, 46 00:01:17,844 --> 00:01:19,445 let's move on to their case, please. 47 00:01:19,513 --> 00:01:20,781 Anyway, 48 00:01:20,847 --> 00:01:22,816 something strange is happening at Party Pines. 49 00:01:22,883 --> 00:01:23,917 (twig snaps) 50 00:01:23,984 --> 00:01:25,051 For the last few weeks, 51 00:01:25,118 --> 00:01:27,688 there's been a thing in the woods. 52 00:01:27,754 --> 00:01:29,723 COLIN: Just standing there watching us. 53 00:01:29,790 --> 00:01:32,492 Not to creep‐shame, but it's kind of creepy. 54 00:01:32,559 --> 00:01:34,661 (gasps) Dude, I wonder if it's the lurker of Party Pines. 55 00:01:34,728 --> 00:01:35,829 Do you remember him? 56 00:01:35,896 --> 00:01:37,330 I wouldn't remember the lurker of Party Pines, 57 00:01:37,397 --> 00:01:40,300 because I was never invited to Party Pines. 58 00:01:40,366 --> 00:01:42,168 Who's the lurker of Party Pines? 59 00:01:42,235 --> 00:01:43,870 Back when we were in high school, 60 00:01:43,937 --> 00:01:46,206 he was this weirdo who hid in the woods 61 00:01:46,272 --> 00:01:47,574 and just watched us. 62 00:01:47,641 --> 00:01:50,443 (twig snaps) 63 00:01:50,511 --> 00:01:51,845 And we all thought maybe he was, like, 64 00:01:51,912 --> 00:01:54,480 an escaped lunatic from the Dicktown Lunatic Asylum, 65 00:01:54,548 --> 00:01:56,016 'cause that's where they kept all the lunatics. 66 00:01:56,082 --> 00:01:58,151 But that was, like, 50 years ago. 67 00:01:58,218 --> 00:01:59,385 You think it's the same guy? 68 00:01:59,452 --> 00:02:01,888 No, he would be dead by now, of course, 69 00:02:01,955 --> 00:02:04,457 but perhaps it's his ghost. 70 00:02:04,525 --> 00:02:06,527 Whatever it is, we want it to leave us alone. 71 00:02:06,593 --> 00:02:07,928 Kids shouldn't have to look over their shoulders 72 00:02:07,994 --> 00:02:09,563 when they're partying illegally in the woods. 73 00:02:09,630 --> 00:02:10,531 (door opens) 74 00:02:10,597 --> 00:02:11,431 MAN: Hey. 75 00:02:11,497 --> 00:02:12,899 ‐Oh, dude. ‐MAN: Hey, you. 76 00:02:12,966 --> 00:02:14,400 ‐We gotta go, we gotta go. ‐We'll see you tomorrow night. 77 00:02:14,467 --> 00:02:16,269 Hey, My Two Dads, get out of here. 78 00:02:16,336 --> 00:02:17,237 Thanks for the pizza. 79 00:02:17,303 --> 00:02:20,340 (dramatic music) 80 00:02:20,406 --> 00:02:22,876 Man, I didn't know you believed in ghosts. 81 00:02:22,943 --> 00:02:24,044 I don't believe in ghosts. 82 00:02:24,110 --> 00:02:25,779 You just said it could be a ghost. 83 00:02:25,846 --> 00:02:27,681 David, you have friends, and you have good hair, 84 00:02:27,748 --> 00:02:29,215 but I have something even better. 85 00:02:29,282 --> 00:02:30,216 Yeah, I know, a houseboat. 86 00:02:30,283 --> 00:02:31,618 An analytical mind. 87 00:02:31,685 --> 00:02:33,086 ‐Oh. ‐I don't believe in ghosts. 88 00:02:33,153 --> 00:02:34,555 I'm a skeptic. 89 00:02:34,621 --> 00:02:37,090 However, I do need money to pay for the houseboat, 90 00:02:37,157 --> 00:02:38,224 and therefore, 91 00:02:38,291 --> 00:02:40,761 why not pose as ghost hunters... 92 00:02:40,827 --> 00:02:42,428 ‐Oh, snap. ‐In order to get more work? 93 00:02:42,495 --> 00:02:44,731 Damn, I love your analytical mind, 94 00:02:44,798 --> 00:02:46,800 your hot, throbbing analytical mind. 95 00:02:46,867 --> 00:02:49,035 It explodes, and I get thoughts all over my face, 96 00:02:49,102 --> 00:02:50,170 and I go crazy. 97 00:02:50,236 --> 00:02:52,272 Oh, no thank you. 98 00:02:52,338 --> 00:02:53,439 (rock music) 99 00:02:53,507 --> 00:02:55,008 Tucker, we need supplies. 100 00:02:55,075 --> 00:02:56,376 TUCKER (over phone): They sell adult diapers at CVS. 101 00:02:56,442 --> 00:02:57,611 Very funny. We're coming over. 102 00:02:57,678 --> 00:02:59,946 TUCKER (over phone): No, you already owe me $500. 103 00:03:00,013 --> 00:03:01,615 Plus, I'm not home. 104 00:03:01,682 --> 00:03:03,049 DAVID: He is totally lying. 105 00:03:03,116 --> 00:03:05,418 Plus, you still haven't returned my binoculars. 106 00:03:05,485 --> 00:03:07,187 Okay, that part's true. 107 00:03:07,253 --> 00:03:09,289 Ghost hunting gear? 108 00:03:09,355 --> 00:03:11,124 Do you even believe in paranormal stuff? 109 00:03:11,191 --> 00:03:13,326 What‐‐what does it matter what I "believe." 110 00:03:13,393 --> 00:03:14,695 Does anything matter? 111 00:03:14,761 --> 00:03:18,264 Mm, your rejection of bourgeois labels is hot. 112 00:03:18,331 --> 00:03:19,633 I thought it was existential nihilism. 113 00:03:19,700 --> 00:03:21,535 I'm still aroused. Here, take these goggles. 114 00:03:21,602 --> 00:03:23,504 All right, well, what do these do? 115 00:03:23,570 --> 00:03:24,838 Help you see at night, genius. 116 00:03:24,905 --> 00:03:26,206 That's why they're called night vision goggles. 117 00:03:26,272 --> 00:03:28,041 Okay, okay, I didn't know what kind of goggles they were. 118 00:03:28,108 --> 00:03:29,309 ‐I'm sorry. ‐(laughs) 119 00:03:29,375 --> 00:03:30,343 I thought maybe they were micro‐penis goggles 120 00:03:30,410 --> 00:03:31,712 for looking at your micro‐penis. 121 00:03:31,778 --> 00:03:33,046 ‐Guys, guys, okay. ‐'Cause it's so tiny, 122 00:03:33,113 --> 00:03:34,380 you need goggles to see it. 123 00:03:34,447 --> 00:03:36,517 Okay, what else do you have, Tucker? 124 00:03:36,583 --> 00:03:38,619 Uh, you can say this old graphing calculator 125 00:03:38,685 --> 00:03:39,820 is an EMF meter. 126 00:03:39,886 --> 00:03:40,787 What's EMF? 127 00:03:40,854 --> 00:03:42,222 BOTH: Electromagnetic frequency. 128 00:03:42,288 --> 00:03:43,590 ‐DAVID: What? ‐Duh. 129 00:03:43,657 --> 00:03:45,792 ‐Ugh, these nerds. ‐Okay, keep it coming, Tucker. 130 00:03:45,859 --> 00:03:46,960 What else? ‐I guess you could tape 131 00:03:47,027 --> 00:03:48,128 this old Xbox to a bike helmet. 132 00:03:48,194 --> 00:03:49,429 Well, that sounds perfect. 133 00:03:49,495 --> 00:03:50,564 That will actually look kind of cool. 134 00:03:50,631 --> 00:03:51,965 All right, and we'll need the walkie‐talkies. 135 00:03:52,032 --> 00:03:56,002 Okay, you already owe me five, so that comes to $800. 136 00:03:56,069 --> 00:03:56,970 ‐Oh, David. ‐Yeah, right. 137 00:03:57,037 --> 00:03:58,371 How about $200 138 00:03:58,438 --> 00:04:00,040 and we don't tell your parents about all this? 139 00:04:00,106 --> 00:04:01,074 No way. 140 00:04:01,141 --> 00:04:03,176 Tucker, my dad will kill me. 141 00:04:03,243 --> 00:04:05,245 Mine too. 142 00:04:05,311 --> 00:04:07,347 (ominous music) 143 00:04:07,413 --> 00:04:09,816 ‐(inhales) Mmm, Party Pines. ‐(groans) 144 00:04:09,883 --> 00:04:11,384 It's good to be back. 145 00:04:11,451 --> 00:04:12,853 Yes, Party Pines. 146 00:04:12,919 --> 00:04:14,988 You know, you said we never invited you here, 147 00:04:15,055 --> 00:04:16,690 but we totally did, man. 148 00:04:16,757 --> 00:04:18,625 Oh, that's right. You did invite me once 149 00:04:18,692 --> 00:04:21,828 to solve the mystery of the wrong bong. 150 00:04:23,764 --> 00:04:26,032 No, this is your bong, Taylor. 151 00:04:26,099 --> 00:04:28,168 Dude, if that was my bong, I'd be high right now, 152 00:04:28,234 --> 00:04:31,572 and if I was high, I'd be paranoid, but I'm not. 153 00:04:31,638 --> 00:04:33,406 That proves somebody snuck up in here and replaced it 154 00:04:33,473 --> 00:04:35,509 with an exact replica, man. 155 00:04:35,576 --> 00:04:37,544 Taylor, it literally has your name on it. 156 00:04:37,611 --> 00:04:39,946 Duh, that's because it's an exact replica. 157 00:04:40,013 --> 00:04:42,649 That's the level of mastermind that we're dealing with. 158 00:04:42,716 --> 00:04:43,617 (sighs) 159 00:04:43,684 --> 00:04:44,951 Don't sigh. It's rude. 160 00:04:45,018 --> 00:04:48,088 Ahh! 161 00:04:48,154 --> 00:04:50,390 ‐Still an open case, buddy. ‐No, it isn't. 162 00:04:50,456 --> 00:04:52,726 (ominous music) 163 00:04:52,793 --> 00:04:54,561 Hey, y'all. What's up? 164 00:04:54,628 --> 00:04:56,496 Uh, where is the keg? 165 00:04:56,563 --> 00:04:58,331 Keg? What are you, cops? 166 00:04:58,398 --> 00:05:00,200 They're too old to be cops. 167 00:05:00,266 --> 00:05:01,935 Whoa, cool graphing calculator. 168 00:05:02,002 --> 00:05:04,170 This is an EMF meter, bruh. We're ghost hunters. 169 00:05:04,237 --> 00:05:05,471 That's right. 170 00:05:05,539 --> 00:05:07,641 If anyone has issues with ghosts or demons, 171 00:05:07,708 --> 00:05:10,110 Hunchman Paranormal Investigations can help. 172 00:05:10,176 --> 00:05:11,144 Where did you get those beers? 173 00:05:11,211 --> 00:05:12,478 Beer? 174 00:05:12,546 --> 00:05:14,180 Beer impairs your mental activity, dude. 175 00:05:14,247 --> 00:05:15,582 This is Super Soylent. 176 00:05:15,649 --> 00:05:17,751 It has cognition‐enhancing nutrients. 177 00:05:17,818 --> 00:05:18,585 Really? 178 00:05:18,652 --> 00:05:19,953 Even folate coenzymes? 179 00:05:20,020 --> 00:05:21,021 Wait, hold on. 180 00:05:21,087 --> 00:05:22,188 You're drinking to get smart? 181 00:05:22,255 --> 00:05:24,324 You're supposed to drink to get dumb. 182 00:05:24,390 --> 00:05:25,992 Dude, something's not right. 183 00:05:26,059 --> 00:05:28,061 Huh? Wait. 184 00:05:28,128 --> 00:05:29,730 What the... 185 00:05:29,796 --> 00:05:32,733 What happened to my Party Pines? 186 00:05:32,799 --> 00:05:35,268 Welcome to Party Pines 2.0. 187 00:05:35,335 --> 00:05:36,402 Wait a minute. 188 00:05:36,469 --> 00:05:38,772 ‐This looks like a TED Talk. ‐What's that? 189 00:05:38,839 --> 00:05:40,941 Oh, it's an annual conference of thought leaders... 190 00:05:41,007 --> 00:05:42,609 ‐Boring, boring. ‐That meets in Vancouver 191 00:05:42,676 --> 00:05:44,678 to present and discuss issues of the day in technology, 192 00:05:44,745 --> 00:05:46,479 entertainment, and design. ‐Boring! 193 00:05:46,547 --> 00:05:48,549 We call it Cognitive Campfire Talks. 194 00:05:48,615 --> 00:05:50,617 We've disrupted the partying paradigm. 195 00:05:50,684 --> 00:05:52,385 We get buzzed on ideas. 196 00:05:52,452 --> 00:05:54,454 ‐And Adderall. ‐But mostly ideas. 197 00:05:54,521 --> 00:05:56,489 Oh, where was this when I was in school? 198 00:05:56,557 --> 00:05:58,391 We're all about leveraging knowledge 199 00:05:58,458 --> 00:06:01,394 to improve our chances in today's zero‐sum economy. 200 00:06:01,461 --> 00:06:03,363 That sounds fun as shit. 201 00:06:05,365 --> 00:06:07,400 We're about to start tonight's program. 202 00:06:07,467 --> 00:06:10,470 Okay, guys, cognitive campfire is starting. 203 00:06:10,537 --> 00:06:13,473 May's up first, game theory for beginners. 204 00:06:13,540 --> 00:06:15,108 (dramatic music) 205 00:06:15,175 --> 00:06:16,743 Well, that sounds really interesting. 206 00:06:16,810 --> 00:06:18,645 I could use a refresher on game theory. 207 00:06:18,712 --> 00:06:21,381 So you better go stand guard now. 208 00:06:21,447 --> 00:06:22,382 Oh, right. 209 00:06:22,448 --> 00:06:24,150 Come on, let's go secure the perimeter 210 00:06:24,217 --> 00:06:28,088 so these nerds can make out with each other's brains. 211 00:06:28,154 --> 00:06:30,691 (ominous music) 212 00:06:30,757 --> 00:06:31,925 (groans) 213 00:06:31,992 --> 00:06:34,728 These woods are definitely creepier than I remember. 214 00:06:34,795 --> 00:06:36,630 Do you see anything? Over. 215 00:06:36,697 --> 00:06:38,599 Breaker one‐nine, that is a negative. 216 00:06:38,665 --> 00:06:40,667 I see nothing. 217 00:06:43,103 --> 00:06:44,170 Okay, like a said before, 218 00:06:44,237 --> 00:06:46,673 please say "over" to end your transmission, okay? 219 00:06:46,740 --> 00:06:48,308 ‐Over. ‐Got it. 220 00:06:48,374 --> 00:06:49,309 Over. 221 00:06:49,375 --> 00:06:50,744 Thank you, over. 222 00:06:50,811 --> 00:06:53,079 ‐DAVID: You're welcome, penis. ‐(groans) 223 00:06:53,146 --> 00:06:54,648 You know, I wonder if they put their lectures on YouTube. 224 00:06:54,715 --> 00:06:56,783 I should probably check out... (gasps) 225 00:06:56,850 --> 00:06:57,718 David. 226 00:06:57,784 --> 00:06:58,952 Oh, my God, David, the mystery man. 227 00:06:59,019 --> 00:07:01,622 What do I do? David, what do I do? 228 00:07:01,688 --> 00:07:03,256 DAVID: You can start by saying "over." 229 00:07:03,323 --> 00:07:05,225 This isn't funny. Over. 230 00:07:05,291 --> 00:07:07,293 He's coming for me. 231 00:07:07,360 --> 00:07:09,663 David, help me. Over. 232 00:07:09,730 --> 00:07:11,898 (breathing heavily) 233 00:07:11,965 --> 00:07:14,200 He was so close. I felt his evil. 234 00:07:14,267 --> 00:07:15,435 What do I do? What do I do? 235 00:07:15,502 --> 00:07:17,003 Use your analytical mind. 236 00:07:17,070 --> 00:07:18,639 Right, I can do this. 237 00:07:18,705 --> 00:07:20,006 Target left the clearing at 9:30 238 00:07:20,073 --> 00:07:21,474 traveling approximately five miles per hour. 239 00:07:21,542 --> 00:07:22,609 You started running at 9:31. 240 00:07:22,676 --> 00:07:24,077 If you run 30 degrees to the east 241 00:07:24,144 --> 00:07:25,378 at 5.25 miles per hour, you'll cut him off at the creek 242 00:07:25,445 --> 00:07:27,514 at 9:34 p. m., over. 243 00:07:27,581 --> 00:07:30,016 I'm on it, over. 244 00:07:30,083 --> 00:07:32,586 In conclusion, the key to game theory is... 245 00:07:32,653 --> 00:07:33,654 (all gasp) 246 00:07:33,720 --> 00:07:35,856 Hi‐ho, nerds. 247 00:07:35,922 --> 00:07:37,190 Look who we got. 248 00:07:37,257 --> 00:07:38,458 Now they'll see who this 249 00:07:38,525 --> 00:07:40,827 non‐ghost mystery man really is. 250 00:07:43,597 --> 00:07:45,298 ‐DAVID: Cam Smith. ‐JOHN: Exactly. 251 00:07:45,365 --> 00:07:47,367 Cam Smith. 252 00:07:47,433 --> 00:07:48,635 I'm sorry. I've never heard of him. 253 00:07:48,702 --> 00:07:50,403 Yeah, me neither, actually. Who's Cam Smith? 254 00:07:50,470 --> 00:07:52,338 Uh, he's the starting center 255 00:07:52,405 --> 00:07:53,439 on your high school basketball team, 256 00:07:53,507 --> 00:07:55,709 the Junior Tobaccaneers. 257 00:07:55,776 --> 00:07:58,244 What, you guys don't support the Junior Tobacs? 258 00:07:58,311 --> 00:08:00,080 All sports cause concussions. 259 00:08:00,146 --> 00:08:02,549 Ugh, why were you hiding in the woods? 260 00:08:02,616 --> 00:08:05,018 Well, I heard about these cool lectures, 261 00:08:05,085 --> 00:08:07,621 well, I‐‐I knew they'd never invite me, 262 00:08:07,688 --> 00:08:08,955 because I'm a jock. 263 00:08:09,022 --> 00:08:11,191 But nerds are cooler than jocks now. 264 00:08:11,257 --> 00:08:12,458 I know. 265 00:08:12,526 --> 00:08:14,460 The whole world is swirling down a toilet of madness. 266 00:08:14,528 --> 00:08:17,097 You're welcome to join our circle of influencers, Cam. 267 00:08:17,163 --> 00:08:18,098 ‐Really? ‐What? 268 00:08:18,164 --> 00:08:19,733 No. What are you doing? 269 00:08:19,800 --> 00:08:21,434 You've built this beautiful intellectual oasis, 270 00:08:21,502 --> 00:08:22,368 and you're gonna let jocks in? 271 00:08:22,435 --> 00:08:24,437 Jocks will ruin it. 272 00:08:24,505 --> 00:08:26,172 Just like they ruined the Beastie Boys. 273 00:08:26,239 --> 00:08:27,207 But we're intersectional. 274 00:08:27,273 --> 00:08:28,474 We'd love to hear the jock perspective. 275 00:08:28,542 --> 00:08:32,546 Oh, the whole world is swirling down a toilet of madness. 276 00:08:32,613 --> 00:08:34,314 Thanks for your help, guys. 277 00:08:34,380 --> 00:08:35,348 Wait, I'm sorry. I've got‐‐ 278 00:08:35,415 --> 00:08:36,850 I've got to say one thing before we go. 279 00:08:36,917 --> 00:08:38,118 All you nerds, listen up. 280 00:08:38,184 --> 00:08:39,886 This is your final lecture for the night. 281 00:08:39,953 --> 00:08:42,155 Party Pines is special, you idiots. 282 00:08:42,222 --> 00:08:44,758 Generations of Dicktown kids have goofed off right here. 283 00:08:44,825 --> 00:08:46,960 This is a sacred space for acting stupid. 284 00:08:47,027 --> 00:08:49,329 That's why he named it Party Pines. 285 00:08:49,395 --> 00:08:52,733 And you nerds are defiling it with free lectures. 286 00:08:52,799 --> 00:08:55,135 What is this, Snapchat Epidemiology? 287 00:08:55,201 --> 00:08:56,102 What the fuck is that? 288 00:08:56,169 --> 00:08:58,004 It's shameful, son, is what it is. 289 00:08:58,071 --> 00:09:00,674 I'm embarrassed to be a Dicktown High alumni. 290 00:09:00,741 --> 00:09:01,908 Thank you. Good night. 291 00:09:01,975 --> 00:09:03,544 Alumnus. 292 00:09:03,610 --> 00:09:04,611 What did you say? 293 00:09:04,678 --> 00:09:06,146 You're embarrassed to be an alumnus. 294 00:09:06,212 --> 00:09:07,714 "Alumni" is plural. 295 00:09:07,781 --> 00:09:09,115 ‐Oh, he's right, actually. ‐Ooh. 296 00:09:09,182 --> 00:09:10,350 You keep acting smart, 297 00:09:10,416 --> 00:09:12,686 I'll burn this whole fucking forest to the ground. 298 00:09:12,753 --> 00:09:14,487 John, let's go. 299 00:09:14,555 --> 00:09:16,590 Great lecture series, everyone. 300 00:09:16,657 --> 00:09:17,891 Thanks. 301 00:09:17,958 --> 00:09:21,261 Well, to our first non‐paranormal 302 00:09:21,327 --> 00:09:22,162 paranormal case. 303 00:09:22,228 --> 00:09:24,631 And to the spirit of Party Pines, RIP. 304 00:09:24,698 --> 00:09:25,999 Oh, David. 305 00:09:26,066 --> 00:09:27,033 Oh, that's gonna leak into the living room. 306 00:09:27,100 --> 00:09:28,434 ‐I'm pouring one out ‐All right. 307 00:09:28,502 --> 00:09:30,637 I guess I'll go get a towel and clean up your mess. 308 00:09:30,704 --> 00:09:32,272 ‐Okay. ‐Ugh. 309 00:09:32,338 --> 00:09:35,842 (light jazzy music) 310 00:09:35,909 --> 00:09:38,144 Hey, I'm sorry we never invited you to Party Pines. 311 00:09:38,211 --> 00:09:39,112 JOHN: It's fine. 312 00:09:39,179 --> 00:09:40,781 Just we didn't like you very much. 313 00:09:40,847 --> 00:09:43,550 JOHN: Well, I appreciate your honesty, I guess. 314 00:09:43,617 --> 00:09:44,951 DAVID: Hey, wouldn't it be weird 315 00:09:45,018 --> 00:09:47,754 if the lurker of Party Pines was still out there somewhere? 316 00:09:47,821 --> 00:09:49,089 I'm sorry, what? 317 00:09:49,155 --> 00:09:50,591 DAVID: I said, wouldn't it be effed up 318 00:09:50,657 --> 00:09:52,158 if the lurker of Party Pines 319 00:09:52,225 --> 00:09:54,427 was still alive out there somewhere? 320 00:09:54,494 --> 00:09:56,897 Oh, David, that is a mystery 321 00:09:56,963 --> 00:09:59,399 that will never be solved. 322 00:09:59,465 --> 00:10:00,701 What? 323 00:10:00,767 --> 00:10:03,670 That is a mystery that will never be solved. 324 00:10:03,737 --> 00:10:05,706 Wait, what? 325 00:10:05,772 --> 00:10:06,973 That is a mystery that will never be solved. 326 00:10:07,040 --> 00:10:09,042 DAVID: Dude, I can't hear you. What are you saying? 327 00:10:09,109 --> 00:10:10,376 It's a mystery that will never be solved. 328 00:10:10,443 --> 00:10:12,112 DAVID: I still can't hear you. What are you saying? 329 00:10:12,178 --> 00:10:14,781 Nothing!