The Office (US Version) - Sixth Season English Subtitles

1
00:00:04,546 --> 00:00:05,797
[GRUNTS]

2
00:00:07,799 --> 00:00:08,967
Parkour!

3
00:00:10,677 --> 00:00:12,554
Michael. Parkour! Parkour!

4
00:00:13,388 --> 00:00:15,056
Extreme. MICHAEL: Parkour!

5
00:00:15,265 --> 00:00:19,602
This is parkour. Internet
sensation of 2004,

6
00:00:19,811 --> 00:00:22,271
and it was in one of the Bond
films. It's pretty impressive.

7
00:00:22,355 --> 00:00:25,900
The goal is to get from point A to
point B as creatively as possible.

8
00:00:25,984 --> 00:00:27,693
So technically they are doing parkour,

9
00:00:27,777 --> 00:00:31,239
as long as point A is delusion
and point B is the hospital.

1
00:00:02,604 --> 00:00:03,730
Yeah? You wanted to see me?

2
00:00:03,814 --> 00:00:07,317
Yes, Oscar, come on in.
Close the door if you would.

3
00:00:07,986 --> 00:00:09,820
Thank you. Thanks so
much for talking to me.

4
00:00:09,904 --> 00:00:10,905
Yeah, sure.

5
00:00:10,989 --> 00:00:13,325
[SIGHS] I'm going in
for a procedure today.

6
00:00:13,409 --> 00:00:15,327
Is everything okay? Yeah.

7
00:00:15,411 --> 00:00:17,621
It's routine. I'm just
a little bit scared.

8
00:00:17,705 --> 00:00:20,374
I'm sure everything will be fine.

9
00:00:20,458 --> 00:00:22,961
What's the procedure, if
you don't mind my asking?

1
00:00:03,035 --> 00:00:04,077
[KNOCK ON DOOR]

2
00:00:04,161 --> 00:00:05,703
Could you please sign my expense report?

3
00:00:05,787 --> 00:00:08,789
No way, no how. Expense
reports are a day-to-day item.

4
00:00:08,873 --> 00:00:12,876
That is Jim's now. I am
exclusively big picture. Epic.

5
00:00:21,217 --> 00:00:22,968
Sign this. Uh-uh-uh.

6
00:00:23,052 --> 00:00:24,970
Where's the please? We're not animals.

7
00:00:25,054 --> 00:00:26,555
[SIGHS] Sign it.

8
00:00:26,639 --> 00:00:27,974
No. Not without a please.

9
00:00:29,433 --> 00:00:30,642
Idiot.

10
00:00:34,688 --> 00:00:35,939

1
00:00:02,333 --> 00:00:03,791
I'm sorry, you guys have probably noticed

2
00:00:03,875 --> 00:00:06,502
my stomach's a little
more sensitive lately.

3
00:00:06,586 --> 00:00:09,839
So, if you wouldn't mind
wearing a little less perfume.

4
00:00:09,923 --> 00:00:11,882
And if your lunch is especially pungent,

5
00:00:11,966 --> 00:00:13,717
maybe have it in the break room.

6
00:00:13,801 --> 00:00:15,177
We would really appreciate it.

7
00:00:15,261 --> 00:00:18,304
Pam is constantly throwing
up because of the pregnancy.

8
00:00:18,388 --> 00:00:22,183
If she eats something the
fetus doesn't like, she is screwed.

9
00:00:22,267 --> 00:00:26,395
It's amazing, a three-ounce
fetus is calling the shots.

1
00:00:02,334 --> 00:00:07,465
The fundamentals of business.
The fundamentals of business.

2
00:00:07,549 --> 00:00:11,135
"Mental" is a part of the
word. I have underlined it.

3
00:00:11,220 --> 00:00:14,014
Because you're mental if
you don't have a good time.

4
00:00:14,098 --> 00:00:15,474
You have to enjoy it.

5
00:00:15,558 --> 00:00:17,643
[STUTTERING] "Fun" is in it.

6
00:00:18,102 --> 00:00:19,145
[ALL EXCLAIMING]

7
00:00:19,229 --> 00:00:20,188
"Fun" -damental.

8
00:00:20,272 --> 00:00:21,647
MEREDITH: Oh, right.

9
00:00:21,731 --> 00:00:23,608
Get out. I know, I know.

10

1
00:00:03,190 --> 00:00:04,691
[DOOR OPENING]

2
00:00:04,775 --> 00:00:05,859
They're back!

3
00:00:05,943 --> 00:00:08,696
Oh, yeah!

4
00:00:08,780 --> 00:00:11,117
Woo-hoo! KEVIN: Jim and Pam!

5
00:00:11,242 --> 00:00:13,535
How was Puerto Rico? Was
it so romantic? JIM: It was.

6
00:00:13,619 --> 00:00:14,619
It really was.

7
00:00:14,703 --> 00:00:15,788
Really was.

8
00:00:15,872 --> 00:00:17,665
I'm so happy for you.

9
00:00:17,749 --> 00:00:18,958
Puerto Rico was awesome.

10
00:00:19,042 --> 00:00:21,086
Oh, my gosh. The honeymoon was great.

1
00:00:01,985 --> 00:00:05,948
And then, I think I'm going
to go to the garlic festival.

2
00:00:06,073 --> 00:00:08,117
Wow. Sounds like fun.
You guys would love it.

3
00:00:08,201 --> 00:00:09,994
No, we wouldn't. They have a TCBY booth.

4
00:00:10,078 --> 00:00:11,871
Cool. Same stuff you get downtown.

5
00:00:11,955 --> 00:00:13,540
Do you like TCBY? Who doesn't?

6
00:00:13,624 --> 00:00:18,838
"I can't believe it's
yogurt." It'll be fun.

7
00:00:18,922 --> 00:00:22,217
I confirmed with Raskin Design and they're
expecting the both of you in an hour.

8
00:00:22,301 --> 00:00:23,970
Oh, actually, it's just going to be me.

9
00:00:24,054 --> 00:00:25,680
They said the both of you.

1
00:00:03,174 --> 00:00:04,842
Good morning, everybody.

2
00:00:04,926 --> 00:00:08,345
Who would like an authentic
New York bagel, hmm?

3
00:00:08,429 --> 00:00:09,762
Stanley? Thank you.

4
00:00:09,846 --> 00:00:13,349
Oh, no, no, no. I got a
pumpernickel just for you.

5
00:00:13,433 --> 00:00:15,767
Wow, H&H.

6
00:00:15,851 --> 00:00:18,937
You went all the way to New
York City to get us bagels?

7
00:00:19,021 --> 00:00:21,606
Why? Is there a place
closer that sells them?

8
00:00:21,690 --> 00:00:23,232
This is really nice, Dwight. Thanks.

9
00:00:23,316 --> 00:00:24,317
Thanks.

1
00:00:02,477 --> 00:00:03,478
[YELLS]

2
00:00:03,562 --> 00:00:05,938
Got you! Broken arm. Boom! Boom! Boom!

3
00:00:06,022 --> 00:00:09,984
Broken nose! Boom! Boom!
Boom! Broken nose! Gonna flip you.

4
00:00:10,068 --> 00:00:12,320
Once a year, Dwight
holds a seminar updating us

5
00:00:12,404 --> 00:00:14,822
on the newest developments
in the world of karate.

6
00:00:14,906 --> 00:00:16,450
Because, as we all know,

7
00:00:16,534 --> 00:00:19,286
the one thing that thousand-year-old
martial arts do all the time

8
00:00:19,370 --> 00:00:20,621
is change.

9
00:00:20,788 --> 00:00:24,750
How can I pose this to
you in a relatable way?

1
00:00:05,848 --> 00:00:07,599
Not again.

2
00:00:07,683 --> 00:00:10,311
Bow down before Recyclops.

3
00:00:10,395 --> 00:00:12,105
Five years ago corporate
said we had to start

4
00:00:12,189 --> 00:00:13,690
a recycling program for Earth Day,

5
00:00:13,774 --> 00:00:15,233
so Dwight took the lead on that,

6
00:00:15,317 --> 00:00:19,322
and introduced us to a very close
friend of his named Recyclops.

7
00:00:19,823 --> 00:00:22,450
Happy Earth Day, everyone. I'm Recyclops.

8
00:00:22,534 --> 00:00:23,952
Did you know that an old milk carton

9
00:00:24,036 --> 00:00:26,288
can be sawed in half
and used as a planter?

10

1
00:00:03,785 --> 00:00:05,703
You wanted to see me? Yeah, have a seat.

2
00:00:05,787 --> 00:00:07,289
Is it serious?

3
00:00:09,458 --> 00:00:12,001
Wow. Andy's a little scared.

4
00:00:12,085 --> 00:00:13,212
Okay, right there.

5
00:00:14,671 --> 00:00:16,422
Right there's the problem.

6
00:00:16,506 --> 00:00:18,925
There have been reports around the office

7
00:00:19,009 --> 00:00:22,554
that you have been talking baby talk.

8
00:00:22,638 --> 00:00:23,721
Why would people say that?

9
00:00:23,805 --> 00:00:29,144
Well, I have it on good authority
that you said the following.

10
00:00:29,436 --> 00:00:31,021
Can you read that back to me?

1
00:00:02,260 --> 00:00:04,177
Attention, everyone!

2
00:00:04,261 --> 00:00:06,179
Jim and I, on behalf of the
Party Planning Committee

3
00:00:06,263 --> 00:00:08,180
have an… Too loud.
Too, too loud. Too loud.

4
00:00:08,264 --> 00:00:12,601
But effective. Look. On behalf
of Jim and I, Merry Christmas.

5
00:00:14,436 --> 00:00:15,520
ALL: Merry Christmas.

6
00:00:15,604 --> 00:00:16,854
Merry Christmas. Good.

7
00:00:16,938 --> 00:00:19,899
My diabolical plot is
on hold for Christmas.

8
00:00:20,441 --> 00:00:24,235
My heart just melts with
the sound of children singing.

9
00:00:25,570 --> 00:00:26,946
[LAUGHING]

1
00:00:03,286 --> 00:00:04,952
MICHAEL: Dunder
Mifflin is about to be sold,

2
00:00:05,036 --> 00:00:08,664
but first an investment banker has
to drop by and sign off on our branch.

3
00:00:08,748 --> 00:00:12,542
And I'm pretty nervous about it,

4
00:00:12,626 --> 00:00:17,423
and I'm making some cosmetic tweaks

5
00:00:18,132 --> 00:00:22,093
to help create a more
appealing environment.

6
00:00:23,261 --> 00:00:25,554
Is that dishonest?
Well, think of it this way.

7
00:00:25,638 --> 00:00:27,139
When you look in the mirror and you see

8
00:00:27,223 --> 00:00:28,681
your push-up bra and your fake eyelashes

9
00:00:28,765 --> 00:00:31,852
and your makeup and your press-on nails,

1
00:00:02,401 --> 00:00:04,695
Oh, yeah! I've got a big box, yes I do!

2
00:00:04,779 --> 00:00:06,572
I've got a big box, how about you?

3
00:00:06,656 --> 00:00:09,909
I've got a big box, yes I do, I've
got a big box, how about you?

4
00:00:09,993 --> 00:00:11,286
I think you don't know
what you're saying.

5
00:00:11,370 --> 00:00:16,209
It is "from Sah-bray," our new
owner, and it is "to Sah-bray." Us!

6
00:00:16,919 --> 00:00:19,421
I wonder what's inside. Scissor me.

7
00:00:24,594 --> 00:00:26,513
Dunder Mifflin was recently bought

8
00:00:26,597 --> 00:00:29,600
by an electronics company named Sah-bray.

9
00:00:29,684 --> 00:00:33,522
They stepped in at the eleventh
hour and they saved our asses.

1
00:00:02,070 --> 00:00:03,278
[PHONE RINGING]

2
00:00:03,362 --> 00:00:04,738
OPERATOR: Vancouver
Court Hotel, how may I help you?

3
00:00:04,822 --> 00:00:06,907
Hello, Vancouver, this is Michael Scott

4
00:00:06,991 --> 00:00:09,410
calling from the United
States of America.

5
00:00:09,494 --> 00:00:11,578
I have a reservation in your fair city

6
00:00:11,662 --> 00:00:14,165
from February 12th to the 19th.

7
00:00:14,332 --> 00:00:15,749
First week of the Olympics.

8
00:00:15,833 --> 00:00:17,166
Well, we're looking
forward to having you,

9
00:00:17,250 --> 00:00:18,835
so let me just pull up
your information here.

1
00:00:02,213 --> 00:00:04,214
I just wanted to check and see
if there was anything you needed

2
00:00:04,298 --> 00:00:06,175
before I went on my maternity leave.

3
00:00:07,051 --> 00:00:08,601
[CHUCKLING] Yeah. I'm pregnant.

4
00:00:09,720 --> 00:00:11,430
Great. Well, I'll write up the order.

5
00:00:11,514 --> 00:00:12,598
Wait a minute. Okay, thanks.

6
00:00:12,682 --> 00:00:16,518
You can't do that. You cannot
exploit your baby for sales.

7
00:00:16,602 --> 00:00:18,562
Hey, did I tell you we're
gonna have a baby?

8
00:00:18,646 --> 00:00:21,482
[CHUCKLES] Thank you
very much. I'm excited… Oh.

9
00:00:22,358 --> 00:00:24,192
Definitely. No. No!

1
00:00:03,961 --> 00:00:05,629
Hello, hello.

2
00:00:06,088 --> 00:00:08,381
Top of the morning to you.

3
00:00:08,465 --> 00:00:09,632
[EXCLAIMS]

4
00:00:09,716 --> 00:00:13,555
Green M&M's. Nature's Viagra.

5
00:00:14,055 --> 00:00:17,266
Two of my favorite joke areas
combined. It's gonna be a good day.

6
00:00:17,350 --> 00:00:18,518
I don't want to bring my friends.

7
00:00:18,602 --> 00:00:19,603
Why can't it just be the two of us?

8
00:00:19,687 --> 00:00:21,271
Because it's St. Patrick's
Day. People go out in groups.

9
00:00:21,355 --> 00:00:22,355
Well, why don't you invite your friends?

10
00:00:22,439 --> 00:00:23,607

1
00:00:03,114 --> 00:00:05,116
Hey, Jim. Jim! Come here.

2
00:00:06,201 --> 00:00:07,702
Do you know who that is?

3
00:00:07,786 --> 00:00:08,786
No.

4
00:00:08,870 --> 00:00:09,997
Look at him. Look at him.

5
00:00:10,081 --> 00:00:11,123
T-shirt, jeans.

6
00:00:11,207 --> 00:00:13,627
Is it you? [LAUGHS] I am flattered.

7
00:00:14,878 --> 00:00:16,004
That's Johnny Depp.

8
00:00:16,088 --> 00:00:18,799
Where'd you take that?
In my condo complex.

9
00:00:18,883 --> 00:00:21,177
Oh, my God, that's right!
I read in People magazine

10
00:00:21,261 --> 00:00:23,388

1
00:00:02,341 --> 00:00:04,469
[MICHAEL GRUNTING]

2
00:00:04,594 --> 00:00:05,636
MICHAEL: Okay.

3
00:00:05,720 --> 00:00:07,138
DWIGHT: Breathe. [GROANS]

4
00:00:07,430 --> 00:00:08,764
Work your core!

5
00:00:08,848 --> 00:00:10,226
[GROANS] Come on.

6
00:00:11,352 --> 00:00:12,394
How many is that?

7
00:00:12,478 --> 00:00:14,062
Not counting the last one, 25.

8
00:00:14,146 --> 00:00:15,105
Count the last one.

9
00:00:15,189 --> 00:00:16,815
Okay, 25 and one girl pushup.

10
00:00:16,900 --> 00:00:18,484
Oh, new record!

1
00:00:02,297 --> 00:00:06,677
[IN KEVIN'S VOICE] Oscar, Toby said
he left my Girl Scout cookies on my chair.

2
00:00:07,136 --> 00:00:10,182
Have you seen them?
Wait, I'm sitting on them.

3
00:00:10,474 --> 00:00:11,599
This is awesome.

4
00:00:11,683 --> 00:00:13,601
Thank you. It didn't even take that long.

5
00:00:13,685 --> 00:00:16,397
What's the difference
between a chimichanga,

6
00:00:16,481 --> 00:00:19,150
a chalupa and a tostada?

7
00:00:19,400 --> 00:00:24,323
Call me back ASAP. It's urgent.

8
00:00:24,615 --> 00:00:29,078
Wait, this isn't funny.
I don't talk like that.

9
00:00:29,162 --> 00:00:30,622
Say, "Me eat cookie."

1
00:00:06,762 --> 00:00:09,556
[BOTH GREETING IN SPANISH]

2
00:00:10,307 --> 00:00:11,599
[PHONE RINGING]

3
00:00:11,683 --> 00:00:12,643
Hello, Dunder Mifflin.

4
00:00:12,727 --> 00:00:14,145
No, no, no. No.

5
00:00:14,229 --> 00:00:15,897
[SPEAKING SPANISH]

6
00:00:17,524 --> 00:00:19,608
I believe that every man,
woman, and child in this country

7
00:00:19,692 --> 00:00:21,111
should learn how to speak Spanish.

8
00:00:21,195 --> 00:00:25,449
They are our neighbors to the
south, and this would be a healing thing

9
00:00:26,200 --> 00:00:28,286
for all of North America.

10
00:00:29,621 --> 00:00:33,875

1
00:00:14,781 --> 00:00:16,240
Stop it! Stop what?

2
00:00:16,324 --> 00:00:18,283
You're talking about me in Morse Code.

3
00:00:18,367 --> 00:00:20,785
But you know what? Joke's on
you 'cause I know Morse Code.

4
00:00:20,869 --> 00:00:21,869
Ha!

5
00:00:23,162 --> 00:00:24,747
Yeah, that's what we're doing.

6
00:00:25,123 --> 00:00:27,707
In our very limited free time
and with our very limited budget,

7
00:00:27,791 --> 00:00:30,542
we went and got a nanny, and
then we went out and took a class

8
00:00:30,626 --> 00:00:33,503
on a very outmoded and very
unnecessary form of communication

9
00:00:33,587 --> 00:00:36,172
just so we can talk
about you in front of you.

1
00:00:02,212 --> 00:00:04,672
This here is a radon test kit.

2
00:00:04,756 --> 00:00:06,214
Okay, I'll be putting them everywhere.

3
00:00:06,298 --> 00:00:08,841
And please don't throw these out.

4
00:00:09,884 --> 00:00:11,927
This is a radon test kit.

5
00:00:12,969 --> 00:00:14,419
Please don't throw these out.

6
00:00:15,846 --> 00:00:17,388
You'll see them all over the office.

7
00:00:17,472 --> 00:00:19,572
Toby has been leaving
radon kits everywhere

8
00:00:20,016 --> 00:00:21,558
like he owns the place.

9
00:00:22,684 --> 00:00:26,062
The first time I threw mine
away, I thought it was an ant trap.

10
00:00:26,937 --> 00:00:28,479

1
00:00:02,193 --> 00:00:06,237
There is nothing wrong,
nor will there ever be wrong,

2
00:00:06,321 --> 00:00:08,239
with any Sabre printers.

3
00:00:08,323 --> 00:00:09,365
Case closed.

4
00:00:09,449 --> 00:00:10,949
[PHONE RINGING]

5
00:00:11,909 --> 00:00:13,994
Michael Scott, as seen on TV.

6
00:00:14,078 --> 00:00:18,038
MAN ON PHONE: I saw you on the
news and I want to pinch your tiny wiener.

7
00:00:18,122 --> 00:00:19,623
[MOUTHS] Oh, my God.

8
00:00:19,707 --> 00:00:20,874
It's Packer.

9
00:00:20,958 --> 00:00:24,335
Oh! Pac-Man, I thought you were a girl.

10
00:00:24,419 --> 00:00:27,088