The Office (US Version) - Second Season English Subtitles

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2x01 : The Dundies by Belkiss, Occeanne
et Unfold http://pmag.f2o.org/theofficeus/

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Tonight is the Dundies, the annual employee
world's night here at Dunder Mifflin

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and this is everybody's favorite
day, everybody looks forward to it.

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Because, you know a lot of the people
here don't get trophies very often

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like Meredith or Kevin. I mean, who's
gonna give Kevin an award ? Dunkin Donuts?

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Plus, bonus, it's
really really funny.

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So I..., you know an employee will
go home, and he'll tell his neighbor:

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"Hey, did you get an award?"
And the neighbor will say:

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Hey, what's up?

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Hey.

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Any emails today?

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Um, I don't think so.

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No?

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Um, check your spam folder.

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Oh, there it is.

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What?

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Um... 50 signs your priest
might be Michael Jackson.

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Well done. Topical.

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I'm an early bird,
and I'm a night owl.

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So I'm wise and I have worms.

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Now.

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Oh! Breakfast.

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I got you your sausage,
egg, and cheese biscuit.

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Yummy, yummy. Thank you, Ryan.

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What was the thing you needed
me to come in early for?

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00:00:19,387 --> 00:00:21,053
Um...

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the sausage, egg,
and cheese biscuit.

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Dunder Miflin, this is Pam.

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Sure, can I ask who's calling?

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Just a second.

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Jim Halpert.

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What?

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How did you get this number?

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Stalker.

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Katie and Jim met in the office.

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And now I guess
they're, like, going out

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or dating or something.

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Happy Halloween, everyone.

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Oh, that's great. Hey.

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Happy Halloween.

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Jan called.

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O...kay.

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I know why she's calling.

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It's the end of the month,

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and I was supposed
to let somebody go

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by the end of the month.

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And somehow I'm supposed to

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Where is my desk?

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That is weird.

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This is not funny. This
is totally unprofessional.

4
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Okay. Well, you're the
one who lost the desk.

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I didn't lose my desk.

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Calm down. Where was the
last place you saw it?

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Okay, who moved my desk?

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I think you should
retrace your steps.

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Okay, I am going

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Hey, have they left for the big
meeting yet? I got Michael's lucky tie.

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No, they're in the
conference room.

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Okay.

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Wait, are those Michael's Levis?

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Yeah. Who dry-cleans jeans?

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Michael and his jeans.

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He gets in them and...

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I'm not exactly
sure what happens,

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but I can tell you, he
loves the way he looks

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You should get one of these.

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No. Thank you.

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Do you even know what this is?

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It is a fitness orb.

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And it has completely
changed my life.

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Forget everything
you thought you knew

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about ab workouts. Done.

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This ab workout

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is specifically designed
to strengthen your core.

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It is Friday morning.

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And it is another beautiful day

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in Scranton, Pennsylvania.

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Oh, my God.

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Oh!

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Pick up, pick up,
pick up, pick up.

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Oh, we have a
serious problem here.

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All right, everybody.

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Lock the doors.
Turn off the lights.

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Go. In the door.

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Push!

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Oh, God. Push.

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No no no! Turn it around.

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Turn it around.
You're breaking...

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Shove it through!

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You shove it.

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Shove it back!

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Here we go.

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Don't break the

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Hey.

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Hello.

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Jim!

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- What's up, buddy?
- This is not funny.

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Why is my stuff in here?

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Wow, that's weird.

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Ooh, dollar for a stapler,
that's pretty good.

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Yeah, well I'm not paying
for my own stuff, okay?

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I know you did this
'cause you're friends

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Lords of the Ring trilogy, if you see it back
to back, it's really long, but it's good.

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Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam.

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Pam! It's Michael. Help me.

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I need help right now.

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Michael, what's wrong?

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I'm hurt. I have hurt myself!

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- Ohh, my God!
- Okay, wait, wait, wait!

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Oh, this is not
looking good, Pam!

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Michael, do you need me
to call an ambulance?!

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Nothing much.
What's up with you?

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I cannot believe
I feel for that.

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Gosh.

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Ha ha. What?

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What? Where's the funny?

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Give it to me.

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Um, is it me or does it
smell like updog in here?

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What's updog?

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Nothing much.
What's up with you?

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What?

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Oh, nothing.

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Pam's on vacation, and
she gets back tomorrow.

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So, it'll be nice to see her.
It'll be nice.

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And, uh, she set a date
for the wedding with Roy.

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Uh, June. Summer.

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So, that'll be nice.

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And that's that.

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What?

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So... I'm happy to be here.

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It's very nice to
see all of you.

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You're all looking well.

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Today's a Women in
the Workplace thing.

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Jan's coming in from corporate

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to talk to all the
women about, um...

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I don't really know what.

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But Michael's not allowed in.

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She said that about five times.

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I really like Valentine's Day

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in this office.

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It's kind of like grade school.

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Everybody gives out
little presents and stuff.

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Like last year,

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Jim gave me this card
with Dwight's head on it.

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It was horrifying and funny.

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Phyllis.

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You could just sign here.

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Let's think this through.

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If we ask corporate
for that, then...

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They are either gonna say...

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yes or no.

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Could go either way.

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We don't know what
they are going to say.

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Think it through!

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Have to think it through.

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Because if they say no...

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1
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I am actually looking forward

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to take your
daughter to work day.

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I am not great with kids.

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But I wanna get better
because I'm getting married.

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00:00:07,742 --> 00:00:10,709
So I put out a bunch of
extra candy on my desk

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so the kids will
come talk to me.

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Like the witch in
Hansel and Gretel.

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Bribery. Nice.

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Oh, I have more.

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So Phil recruited me
to sell these cards,

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and now I am recruiting you.

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Who is this guy again?

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Don't worry about Phil.

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He drives a Corvette.
He is doing just fine.

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Okay, calling cards are
the wave of the future.

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These things sell themselves.

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Who uses calling cards anymore?

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You know what, that's
a nice attitude, Ryan.

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Kevin Malone, you're next.

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Spit that out.

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Spit... okay, come on. Let's go.

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You look cute today, Dwight.

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Thanks, girl.

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So, yesterday, Dwight
found half a joint

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in the parking lot.

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Which is unfortunate,
because, as it turns out,

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Dwight finding drugs
is more dangerous

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So, uh, have you found a
band yet for your wedding?

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No. 'Cause I'm in a band.

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We really rock.

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Yeah. I mean, it's inevitable.

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I definitely overhear
some wedding preparation,

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00:00:15,549 --> 00:00:16,982
but I'm fine with it.

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She hears me arranging
my social life,

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and we both have to hear
Dwight order deer urine

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over the Internet,

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Tonight the Scranton Business
Park is having Casino Night.

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And we are converting
our warehouse

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00:00:06,307 --> 00:00:07,873
into a full-blown gambling hall.

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00:00:07,875 --> 00:00:11,043
And I know it's illegal
in Pennsylvania.

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But it's for charity.

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And I consider myself
a great philanderer.

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It's just nice to know
at the end of the day

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I can look in the
mirror and say,

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