The Big Bang Theory - Twelfth Season English Subtitles

1
00:00:01,420 --> 00:00:03,220
Previously on The
Big Bang Theory...

2
00:00:03,580 --> 00:00:07,290
Can you believe our little
lamb is finally getting married?

3
00:00:07,380 --> 00:00:08,416
He can't believe it.

4
00:00:10,180 --> 00:00:11,580
And neither can I.

5
00:00:13,140 --> 00:00:14,140
Hi, Dad. How you doing?

6
00:00:17,940 --> 00:00:20,141
By the power vested in me...

7
00:00:20,143 --> 00:00:23,051
by "Even-you-can-perform-
weddings-dot-com".

8
00:00:25,260 --> 00:00:27,411
I now pronounce
you husband and wife.

9
00:00:28,540 --> 00:00:29,610
You may kiss the bride.

1
00:00:01,260 --> 00:00:02,876
Previously on The
Big Bang Theory...

2
00:00:02,900 --> 00:00:06,098
Actually, I need to talk to
both of you about your paper.

3
00:00:06,180 --> 00:00:07,978
Oh, right, how are
the citations coming?

4
00:00:08,060 --> 00:00:09,060
Um...

5
00:00:09,420 --> 00:00:14,620
We came across a Russian paper
that seems to disprove super-asymmetry.

6
00:00:23,380 --> 00:00:25,531
Okay, Sheldon and
Amy are still pretty upset

7
00:00:25,620 --> 00:00:27,213
about their theory
being disproved.

8
00:00:27,300 --> 00:00:31,055
So we have made a list of
subjects for everyone to avoid.

9

1
00:00:02,800 --> 00:00:04,996
Champagne, champagne,

2
00:00:05,080 --> 00:00:07,720
champagne with a
packet of Splenda in it.

3
00:00:08,880 --> 00:00:11,161
- You know what I call this drink?
- A waste of champagne?

4
00:00:12,080 --> 00:00:14,515
No. A Doctor Cooper.

5
00:00:15,680 --> 00:00:16,830
Because...

6
00:00:16,960 --> 00:00:19,520
He's also sweet and bubbly.

7
00:00:21,440 --> 00:00:22,358
All right.

8
00:00:22,360 --> 00:00:23,536
Uh...

9
00:00:23,560 --> 00:00:24,880
A toast to Sheldon and Amy

10
00:00:24,960 --> 00:00:27,111

1
00:00:01,180 --> 00:00:02,980
Previously on The
Big Bang Theory...

2
00:00:03,020 --> 00:00:05,137
So I told my mom she
just needed to back off.

3
00:00:05,220 --> 00:00:06,220
This is our wedding,

4
00:00:06,300 --> 00:00:08,258
and if anyone's gonna
design the floral arrangements,

5
00:00:08,260 --> 00:00:10,172
it's going to be my man.

6
00:00:11,380 --> 00:00:13,019
Thank you.

7
00:00:13,100 --> 00:00:15,296
I mean, I'm not trying
to be a groomzilla,

8
00:00:15,380 --> 00:00:17,815
but this is my special day.

9
00:00:21,700 --> 00:00:22,618
Everything okay?

1
00:00:03,000 --> 00:00:07,199
- Hello. I'm Dr. Sheldon Cooper.
- And I'm Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler.

2
00:00:07,280 --> 00:00:10,956
And this is, Dr. Sheldon Cooper
and Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler present

3
00:00:11,040 --> 00:00:13,191
- Dr. Sheldon Cooper's Fun with Flags.
- Dr. Sheldon Cooper's Fun with Flags.

4
00:00:15,320 --> 00:00:19,155
I'd like to start this episode by
apologizing on behalf of Dr. Fowler,

5
00:00:19,240 --> 00:00:20,833
who made the
wild claim last week

6
00:00:20,920 --> 00:00:23,799
that there was no national
tricolored flag with a purple stripe.

7
00:00:23,880 --> 00:00:26,918
When in fact the Estonian
governorate inside the Russian Empire,

8
00:00:27,000 --> 00:00:30,880
had a purple stripe on
their flag from 1721 to 1917.

1
00:00:03,580 --> 00:00:04,934
Ooh, it's freezing out here.

2
00:00:05,540 --> 00:00:07,816
Would you like me
to heat things up?

3
00:00:07,900 --> 00:00:10,620
No, I wanna get in the
hot tub before I loose a toe.

4
00:00:12,300 --> 00:00:13,300
Oh.

5
00:00:13,540 --> 00:00:14,540
That is bright.

6
00:00:14,660 --> 00:00:17,175
Yeah, new neighbor
put in floodlights.

7
00:00:18,500 --> 00:00:19,820
So, shall we?

8
00:00:21,020 --> 00:00:24,218
No, I don't wanna take my
robe off under a spotlight.

9
00:00:24,460 --> 00:00:26,053
This is a candle body.

1
00:00:01,080 --> 00:00:02,880
Previously on The
Big Bang Theory...

2
00:00:03,040 --> 00:00:06,317
Uh, we sort of have another
reason for asking you here.

3
00:00:07,320 --> 00:00:11,109
We want to have a baby,
but we can't do it on our own.

4
00:00:11,280 --> 00:00:12,919
Okay. Whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa, whoa!

5
00:00:13,000 --> 00:00:14,912
This has been
such a nice evening.

6
00:00:15,000 --> 00:00:17,674
Let's all just stop before
anyone says any more things.

7
00:00:18,000 --> 00:00:19,558
Leonard, would you be
the father of our baby?

8
00:00:19,560 --> 00:00:21,153
Oh, you said a thing.

9

1
00:00:02,712 --> 00:00:04,431
All right, Professor
Proton fans,

2
00:00:04,512 --> 00:00:08,426
get ready to meet Dr. Sheldon
Cooper and Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler,

3
00:00:08,512 --> 00:00:12,552
a pair of real life scientists
who may win the Nobel Prize.

4
00:00:12,952 --> 00:00:17,231
That's like the Kids' Choice Award,
but with more science and less slime.

5
00:00:19,592 --> 00:00:20,912
Hi. Thanks for having us.

6
00:00:21,112 --> 00:00:21,862
Kids' Choice...

7
00:00:21,864 --> 00:00:23,866
Why would they let
kids choose anything?

8
00:00:23,952 --> 00:00:25,352
They're basically human larva.

9
00:00:27,312 --> 00:00:29,224
Well, they are kind

1
00:00:01,080 --> 00:00:02,800
Previously on The
Big Bang Theory...

2
00:00:02,920 --> 00:00:04,838
The drug I've been working
on for the past five years

3
00:00:04,840 --> 00:00:06,433
just got approved by the FDA.

4
00:00:06,800 --> 00:00:08,029
- Congratulations!
- Wow!

5
00:00:08,120 --> 00:00:10,112
Was that the decongestant
you developed?

6
00:00:10,200 --> 00:00:12,999
No, we had to rebrand that as
a solvent for mining equipment.

7
00:00:15,000 --> 00:00:17,117
- It's her anti-inflammatory drug.
- Oh.

8
00:00:17,200 --> 00:00:19,760
Yep, three years of testing
and no reported side effects.

9

1
00:00:01,160 --> 00:00:02,616
Previously on The
Big Bang Theory...

2
00:00:02,640 --> 00:00:04,597
We just published
a few months ago.

3
00:00:04,680 --> 00:00:06,797
How did you have time
to design an experiment?

4
00:00:06,880 --> 00:00:09,918
This whole thing is
actually a gigantic accident.

5
00:00:10,000 --> 00:00:12,640
You weren't even thinking
about super-asymmetry?

6
00:00:12,840 --> 00:00:13,876
Thinking about it?

7
00:00:14,600 --> 00:00:16,034
We don't even understand it.

8
00:00:17,520 --> 00:00:18,749
Now, can you believe this?

9
00:00:18,840 --> 00:00:21,275
Doctors Pemberton and Campbell

1
00:00:01,250 --> 00:00:02,906
Previously on The
Big Bang Theory...

2
00:00:02,930 --> 00:00:05,161
We conclusively
proved super-asymmetry,

3
00:00:05,250 --> 00:00:08,129
and yet somehow we,
we still feel like impostors.

4
00:00:08,210 --> 00:00:09,690
There should be a term for that.

5
00:00:09,770 --> 00:00:12,604
Oh, for crying out loud,
there is a term for that!

6
00:00:12,690 --> 00:00:15,922
It's called "imposter
syndrome" and you don't have it!

7
00:00:16,010 --> 00:00:19,526
Because you can't have it if
you are impostors, and you are!

8
00:00:19,610 --> 00:00:22,000
We're the ones who
discovered super-asymmetry!

9

1
00:00:02,540 --> 00:00:04,497
Yeah, but I think by the
end of the honeymoon,

2
00:00:04,580 --> 00:00:06,811
we really started to feel
like a married couple.

3
00:00:07,260 --> 00:00:10,139
Yeah, but the good kind,
like on TV, not like my parents.

4
00:00:10,260 --> 00:00:11,260
Yeah.

5
00:00:11,340 --> 00:00:13,858
You're not a real married couple
until you can pee with the door open

6
00:00:13,860 --> 00:00:15,010
and she's okay with it.

7
00:00:16,460 --> 00:00:17,860
I told you I'm not okay with it.

8
00:00:19,420 --> 00:00:20,536
She loves it.

9
00:00:22,340 --> 00:00:25,333
So, we got everybody gifts.

1
00:00:02,800 --> 00:00:05,000
Oh, the... There's a
7:15 at the ArcLight.

2
00:00:05,050 --> 00:00:06,608
Well, that doesn't give
us much time to eat.

3
00:00:06,610 --> 00:00:07,610
We can eat afterwards.

4
00:00:07,611 --> 00:00:10,569
I'm not gonna eat at 10:00 at
night. Who am I, Hemingway?

5
00:00:12,250 --> 00:00:14,242
Why do you think
Hemingway ate at 10:00?

6
00:00:14,650 --> 00:00:16,770
He spent a lot of time in
Spain, they eat dinner late.

7
00:00:17,290 --> 00:00:18,808
He also spent a
lot of time in Florida.

8
00:00:18,810 --> 00:00:21,210
Last time I was there people
were eating dinner at like 4:30.

9

1
00:00:01,180 --> 00:00:02,820
Previously on The
Big Bang Theory...

2
00:00:03,140 --> 00:00:05,371
We conclusively
proved super-asymmetry,

3
00:00:05,580 --> 00:00:08,573
and yet somehow we,
we still feel like impostors.

4
00:00:08,740 --> 00:00:10,020
There should be a term for that.

5
00:00:10,180 --> 00:00:12,570
Oh, for crying out loud,
there is a term for that!

6
00:00:12,980 --> 00:00:15,973
It's called "imposter
syndrome" and you don't have it!

7
00:00:16,060 --> 00:00:19,736
Because you can't have it if
you are impostors, and you are!

8
00:00:19,820 --> 00:00:22,380
We're the ones who
discovered super-asymmetry!

9

1
00:00:03,040 --> 00:00:04,318
Leonard, when are you leaving to

2
00:00:04,320 --> 00:00:05,798
pick your mother
up from the airport?

3
00:00:05,800 --> 00:00:08,360
Uh... Well, let's see,
her plane gets in at 3:00,

4
00:00:08,440 --> 00:00:10,875
figure half an hour to get
her luggage, so... Never.

5
00:00:12,880 --> 00:00:13,880
Never?

6
00:00:14,160 --> 00:00:16,311
Isn't that usually when
you go to the gym?

7
00:00:17,720 --> 00:00:19,712
Are you really not gonna
pick up your mother?

8
00:00:19,800 --> 00:00:22,190
No, it's fine, she likes
to take a cab or a shuttle.

9
00:00:22,280 --> 00:00:23,839

1
00:00:01,340 --> 00:00:03,060
Previously on The
Big Bang Theory...

2
00:00:03,260 --> 00:00:05,138
Guess I'm your new
neighbor. Penny.

3
00:00:05,220 --> 00:00:07,098
- Leonard. Sheldon.
- Hi.

4
00:00:07,180 --> 00:00:09,649
- Hi.
- Hi.

5
00:00:10,100 --> 00:00:11,100
That's where I sit.

6
00:00:11,180 --> 00:00:12,056
Howard Wolowitz.

7
00:00:12,058 --> 00:00:14,139
Caltech Department
of Applied Physics.

8
00:00:14,220 --> 00:00:15,256
Penny?

9
00:00:15,340 --> 00:00:16,340
Leonard.

1
00:00:09,585 --> 00:00:12,695
♪ Broke into the old apartment ♪

2
00:00:16,062 --> 00:00:18,542
♪ This is where we used to live ♪

3
00:00:22,808 --> 00:00:25,728
♪ Broken windows,
broke and hungry ♪

4
00:00:25,768 --> 00:00:29,558
♪ Broken hearts and broken bones ♪

5
00:00:29,598 --> 00:00:32,728
♪ This is where we used to live ♪

6
00:00:36,209 --> 00:00:38,588
♪ Broke into the old apartment... ♪

7
00:00:38,622 --> 00:00:40,691
Ladies and gentlemen,
here they are now.

8
00:00:40,716 --> 00:00:42,464
You have made every
single one of these episodes

9
00:00:42,466 --> 00:00:44,854
these 12 years an
absolute dream come true.

1
00:00:02,800 --> 00:00:04,465
So, Penny, we were
talking to our neighbors

2
00:00:04,468 --> 00:00:06,506
and they're thinking of
moving and selling their house.

3
00:00:06,508 --> 00:00:07,426
Really? Why?

4
00:00:07,428 --> 00:00:08,783
Something about
babies crying and keeping

5
00:00:08,785 --> 00:00:10,106
them up all night,
it's not important.

6
00:00:10,108 --> 00:00:11,748
You guys should
totally take a look at it.

7
00:00:11,828 --> 00:00:13,785
Then we could be neighbors!

8
00:00:13,868 --> 00:00:15,461
Hey, wait a minute,
what about us?

9
00:00:15,588 --> 00:00:18,262

1
00:00:03,080 --> 00:00:04,355
Hey, what you doing?

2
00:00:04,440 --> 00:00:06,272
Improving our wedding photos.

3
00:00:06,440 --> 00:00:07,440
Oh, that's nice.

4
00:00:07,800 --> 00:00:09,154
Wait, I'm still in them, right?

5
00:00:10,360 --> 00:00:12,113
Of course. And not only you,

6
00:00:12,200 --> 00:00:14,590
I've added some guests
who couldn't be there.

7
00:00:15,800 --> 00:00:17,712
Oh. Who's that
next to my father?

8
00:00:17,800 --> 00:00:18,870
The Wright brothers.

9
00:00:20,320 --> 00:00:21,879
And why are they at our wedding?

10
00:00:21,960 --> 00:00:23,838

1
00:00:02,740 --> 00:00:06,939
Recently, 12 new moons
were discovered orbiting Jupiter,

2
00:00:07,020 --> 00:00:09,137
bringing the total up to 79.

3
00:00:09,220 --> 00:00:11,052
As a middle child myself,

4
00:00:11,140 --> 00:00:15,020
I'd like to extend my sympathies
to moons two through seventy-eight.

5
00:00:16,820 --> 00:00:18,732
Your grandpa will
never learn your name.

6
00:00:21,740 --> 00:00:23,538
I'd like to thank
you for joining me

7
00:00:23,620 --> 00:00:25,580
on this journey
through the stars.

8
00:00:26,460 --> 00:00:28,372
If you enjoyed this lecture,

9
00:00:28,460 --> 00:00:31,851
please come back Thursday

1
00:00:02,840 --> 00:00:03,758
Hey, did you guys know

2
00:00:03,760 --> 00:00:06,355
this year's the fortieth
anniversary of Halloween?

3
00:00:06,440 --> 00:00:07,590
See... Oh, nonsense.

4
00:00:07,680 --> 00:00:11,071
Halloween traditions date back
to the Celtic festival of Samhain.

5
00:00:11,160 --> 00:00:13,152
Although, our current
Halloween customs

6
00:00:13,240 --> 00:00:15,232
come from the evening
before All Hallows Day,

7
00:00:15,320 --> 00:00:18,279
All Hallows Eve, thus Halloween.

8
00:00:18,360 --> 00:00:19,999
I meant the movie Halloween.

9
00:00:21,240 --> 00:00:22,158
Oh.

1
00:00:05,100 --> 00:00:06,200
Oh, this is amazing.

2
00:00:06,740 --> 00:00:08,857
I wish I had a playhouse
like this when I was a kid.

3
00:00:08,940 --> 00:00:10,454
Really, you never
had a playhouse?

4
00:00:10,580 --> 00:00:11,650
No.

5
00:00:11,740 --> 00:00:14,699
I mean, my dad did buy the
house next door for us to play in.

6
00:00:15,940 --> 00:00:18,375
I'm gonna hook up the garden
hose so it has running water.

7
00:00:18,460 --> 00:00:20,100
Why does it need running water?

8
00:00:20,700 --> 00:00:22,020
Same reason
it's got electricity.

9
00:00:22,060 --> 00:00:24,336
Bernadette and I both work

1
00:00:03,000 --> 00:00:05,500
Hey, you guys have any
plans for Valentine's Day?

2
00:00:05,500 --> 00:00:07,731
- Three months from now? No.
- What? No?

3
00:00:08,500 --> 00:00:11,174
I mean, secret romantic plans
that would be ruined if I told you.

4
00:00:11,260 --> 00:00:12,260
Oh.

5
00:00:14,060 --> 00:00:15,060
What's going on, Raj?

6
00:00:15,220 --> 00:00:18,770
Well, how would you guys feel
about going to India for my wedding?

7
00:00:19,940 --> 00:00:21,579
That's so exciting!

8
00:00:21,900 --> 00:00:24,813
Penny, you will never guess what
I have planned for Valentine's Day.

9
00:00:24,900 --> 00:00:25,900
Uh-huh.

1
00:00:02,860 --> 00:00:05,898
Sheldon, do you wanna put
the tables after each section

2
00:00:05,980 --> 00:00:07,573
or in an appendix at the end?

3
00:00:08,220 --> 00:00:10,132
You know what, we
wrote this paper together,

4
00:00:10,220 --> 00:00:13,497
I think we should decide together
that they go in an appendix at the end.

5
00:00:15,700 --> 00:00:17,612
How about that,
there is an "I" in team.

6
00:00:22,100 --> 00:00:23,534
Look at what we made.

7
00:00:23,620 --> 00:00:26,738
Oh, I know. Yeah, it really
is the best of both of us.

8
00:00:26,820 --> 00:00:28,413
You know, it's got my math

9
00:00:28,500 --> 00:00:31,572
and your sassy takedown of the