The Big Bang Theory - Third Season English Subtitles

1
00:00:00,084 --> 00:00:01,959
Previously on The Big Bang Theory...

2
00:00:02,127 --> 00:00:05,542
I am going to the Arctic Circle
with Leonard, Wolowitz and Koothrappali.

3
00:00:05,798 --> 00:00:07,634
- For three months?
- Yes.

4
00:00:08,102 --> 00:00:11,036
What did you mean when you said
you were going to miss me?

5
00:00:13,290 --> 00:00:15,465
It means I wish you weren't going.

6
00:00:30,129 --> 00:00:31,405
Thank God we're home.

7
00:00:31,573 --> 00:00:35,205
I can't believe we spent three months
in that frozen hell.

8
00:00:35,744 --> 00:00:39,246
It was like a snowy nightmare
from which there was no awakening.

9
00:00:39,873 --> 00:00:42,292
I don't know what Arctic expedition

1
00:00:01,667 --> 00:00:03,001
Sheldon, you're wrong.

2
00:00:03,067 --> 00:00:06,134
Wolverine was not born with bone claws.
Howard,

3
00:00:06,201 --> 00:00:07,834
you know me to be
a very smart man.

4
00:00:07,867 --> 00:00:11,834
Don't you think
if I were wrong, I'd know it?

5
00:00:11,900 --> 00:00:13,734
Okay, first of all...
Give it up, dude.

6
00:00:13,767 --> 00:00:16,267
You're arguing
with a crazy person.

7
00:00:16,334 --> 00:00:17,667
I'm not crazy.

8
00:00:17,734 --> 00:00:19,267
My mother had me tested.

9
00:00:20,667 --> 00:00:22,667
Hey, guys.

1
00:00:01,350 --> 00:00:05,030
♪ going out tonight, I'm feeling all right

2
00:00:05,040 --> 00:00:08,960
♪ going to let it all hang out

3
00:00:08,970 --> 00:00:12,770
♪ wanna make some
noise, even raise my voice

4
00:00:12,780 --> 00:00:16,680
♪ yeah, I wanna scream and shout

5
00:00:21,530 --> 00:00:24,140
Morning, Sheldon.  come dance with me.

6
00:00:26,130 --> 00:00:27,860
No.

7
00:00:28,510 --> 00:00:30,100
Why not?

8
00:00:30,120 --> 00:00:33,490
Penny, while I subscribe
to the "many worlds" theory

9
00:00:33,500 --> 00:00:36,090
Which pots the existence of
an infinite number of Sheldons

10

1
00:00:04,324 --> 00:00:06,844
This movie baffles me
every time we watch it.

2
00:00:07,381 --> 00:00:08,356
What do you mean?

3
00:00:08,408 --> 00:00:10,010
The instructions are very clear:

4
00:00:10,124 --> 00:00:11,867
"don't feed the gremlins
after midnight."

5
00:00:13,594 --> 00:00:15,419
"don't get the gremlins wet."

6
00:00:18,195 --> 00:00:19,441
How hard is that?

7
00:00:22,054 --> 00:00:23,114
Hi, guys.

8
00:00:23,236 --> 00:00:24,186
Hi, honey.

9
00:00:24,278 --> 00:00:25,081
Hey.

10
00:00:25,157 --> 00:00:26,422

1
00:00:02,124 --> 00:00:05,776
All right, Raj has played
his phantom warlord card,

2
00:00:05,844 --> 00:00:10,614
and I am going to back him
up with my strangling vines.

3
00:00:11,483 --> 00:00:14,151
Choke on that, sucka.

4
00:00:14,219 --> 00:00:19,056
Okay, well, then I'll just cut
your vines with my ruby sword.

5
00:00:19,124 --> 00:00:22,994
That's right, I did it. I cut 'em.

6
00:00:23,061 --> 00:00:25,847
Um...

7
00:00:25,914 --> 00:00:27,815
I have a question.

8
00:00:27,900 --> 00:00:31,569
Warlord beats troll, troll beats elf,

9
00:00:31,636 --> 00:00:32,904
elf beats water sprite,

10

1
00:00:02,070 --> 00:00:02,762
Kites, ho!

2
00:00:04,920 --> 00:00:06,102
ALL:
Kites, ho!

3
00:00:07,279 --> 00:00:08,262
Excuse me.

4
00:00:08,349 --> 00:00:10,096
You're misusing the word "ho."

5
00:00:11,486 --> 00:00:13,296
It's an interjection used
to call attention

6
00:00:13,375 --> 00:00:16,520
to a destination, not an object,
as in, uh, "Land, ho!"

7
00:00:16,601 --> 00:00:18,167
Or, uh, "Westward, ho!"

8
00:00:21,507 --> 00:00:22,500
ALL:
Kites, ho!

9
00:00:24,357 --> 00:00:25,943
Hey, guys.
Whatcha doin'?

1
00:00:01,800 --> 00:00:04,800
Wow, Sheldon, I cannot believe
you made up your own game.

3
00:00:08,802 --> 00:00:11,802
It's like the slogan says,
"The Physics is theoretical,

4
00:00:11,867 --> 00:00:13,767
but the fun is real."

5
00:00:14,233 --> 00:00:17,300
We must not be playing it right.

6
00:00:18,300 --> 00:00:19,834
All right, five.

7
00:00:19,901 --> 00:00:22,434
One, two, three, four, five.

8
00:00:22,500 --> 00:00:23,767
Oh, wow, look at that.

9
00:00:23,834 --> 00:00:26,500
My Department of Defense
research grant is renewed.

10
00:00:26,567 --> 00:00:28,500
Oh! Great roll!

11

1
00:00:01,924 --> 00:00:03,642
How much time do we have?

2
00:00:03,726 --> 00:00:05,827
Uh, t-minus five hours,
37 minutes

3
00:00:05,895 --> 00:00:07,462
To onset of meteor shower.

4
00:00:07,513 --> 00:00:10,382
Okay, our position
is 34.48 degrees north,

5
00:00:10,450 --> 00:00:11,566
118.31 west.

6
00:00:11,634 --> 00:00:12,818
That means the azimuth

7
00:00:12,902 --> 00:00:14,135
Should be...

8
00:00:14,187 --> 00:00:17,439
168.22 degrees relative
to magnetic north

9
00:00:17,440 --> 00:00:20,058
With an elevation
of 49.93.

1
00:00:01,567 --> 00:00:03,900
So two years later,
there's a knock on the door.

2
00:00:03,967 --> 00:00:06,034
Guy opens it, and there on his porch
 is the snail

3
00:00:06,101 --> 00:00:08,067
who says, "What the heck
was all that about?"

4
00:00:08,134 --> 00:00:10,134
(both laughing)

5
00:00:11,434 --> 00:00:13,301
I don't really get it.

6
00:00:13,368 --> 00:00:16,567
Well, see, it took two
years for the snail ...

7
00:00:20,368 --> 00:00:22,767
Not important.

8
00:00:22,767 --> 00:00:25,401
Can I ask you a question?
Sure.

9
00:00:25,401 --> 00:00:27,234
Where do you think

1
00:00:01,300 --> 00:00:03,700
Hey, Leonard, check this out.

2
00:00:08,230 --> 00:00:10,230
Leonard, she's doing it again.

3
00:00:11,400 --> 00:00:12,460
I think it upsets Sheldon

4
00:00:12,530 --> 00:00:13,860
when you play with the food.

5
00:00:13,930 --> 00:00:15,300
No.

6
00:00:15,360 --> 00:00:17,300
It upsets Sheldon when she willy-nilly takes it

7
00:00:17,360 --> 00:00:18,830
from the containers without regard

8
00:00:18,900 --> 00:00:20,200
for its equitable distribution.

9
00:00:20,260 --> 00:00:24,230
This is essentially why you have famine in India.

10
00:00:26,260 --> 00:00:28,960
You want me to put it back?

1
00:00:04,938 --> 00:00:06,372
Oh, I always tear up

2
00:00:06,439 --> 00:00:08,607
when the Grinch's heart
grows three sizes.

3
00:00:08,675 --> 00:00:10,637
Tears seem appropriate.

4
00:00:10,705 --> 00:00:12,294
Enlargement of the heart muscle,

5
00:00:12,362 --> 00:00:14,667
or hypertrophic cardiomyopathy,
is a serious disease

6
00:00:14,734 --> 00:00:16,731
which could lead to congestive
heart failure.

7
00:00:21,032 --> 00:00:23,266
You really didn't
like it, Sheldon?

8
00:00:23,333 --> 00:00:24,766
No, on the contrary.

9
00:00:24,834 --> 00:00:27,239
I found the Grinch
to be a relatable,

1
00:00:02,103 --> 00:00:05,188
Look at us. Getting ready for a double date

2
00:00:05,256 --> 00:00:07,324
with actual women who publicly acknowledge

3
00:00:07,391 --> 00:00:09,826
they're our girlfriends.

4
00:00:09,894 --> 00:00:13,196
Yes, actual women are the best.

5
00:00:13,264 --> 00:00:14,264
I don't understand.

6
00:00:14,332 --> 00:00:15,665
What other kind of women are there?

7
00:00:15,733 --> 00:00:18,668
Howard, artificial women
are your department.

8
00:00:18,736 --> 00:00:21,671
You want to take this?

9
00:00:21,739 --> 00:00:24,708
No, it would just freak him out.

10
00:00:24,775 --> 00:00:27,210
Listen, before we leave,

1
00:00:03,234 --> 00:00:04,134
Seems like forever,

2
00:00:04,135 --> 00:00:06,436
since the four of us have
been out to eat, you know?

3
00:00:06,504 --> 00:00:07,937
Just the guys.

4
00:00:08,005 --> 00:00:09,272
Oh, God! Yes, we get it.

5
00:00:09,340 --> 00:00:12,175
You have a girlfriend now.

6
00:00:12,242 --> 00:00:13,710
A little jealous, are we?

7
00:00:13,777 --> 00:00:15,030
No, I'm not jealous.

8
00:00:18,126 --> 00:00:20,637
All right, I'd kill a
hobo if it'll get me laid.

9
00:00:20,705 --> 00:00:22,106
Now, can we order?

10
00:00:22,173 --> 00:00:25,708

1
00:00:15,006 --> 00:00:16,894
Whatcha doing?

2
00:00:16,962 --> 00:00:19,726
I'm attempting to view my work
as a fleeting peripheral image

3
00:00:19,794 --> 00:00:22,559
so as to engage the superior
colliculus of my brain.

4
00:00:25,795 --> 00:00:27,160
Interesting.

5
00:00:27,228 --> 00:00:29,030
I usually just have coffee.

6
00:00:29,867 --> 00:00:31,137
You've been up all night?

7
00:00:31,204 --> 00:00:32,141
Is it morning?

8
00:00:32,209 --> 00:00:33,146
Yes.

9
00:00:33,214 --> 00:00:34,714
Then I've been up all night.

10
00:00:37,151 --> 00:00:38,658

1
00:00:01,323 --> 00:00:03,091
Yeah, I miss you, too, sweetie.

2
00:00:03,158 --> 00:00:06,069
Listen, I got to go,
but I'll see you tonight?

3
00:00:06,104 --> 00:00:06,891
Okay.

4
00:00:06,959 --> 00:00:09,404
Bye-bye.

5
00:00:09,472 --> 00:00:11,481
No, you hang up first.

6
00:00:12,484 --> 00:00:14,486
Hello?

7
00:00:15,623 --> 00:00:17,561
Dude, I'm glad you finally got a girlfriend,

8
00:00:17,628 --> 00:00:20,263
but do you have to do all
that lovey-dovey stuff

9
00:00:20,331 --> 00:00:22,231
in front of those of us who don't?

10
00:00:22,299 --> 00:00:23,670

1
00:00:20,253 --> 00:00:22,861
Will you please turn
your shirt off?

2
00:00:22,895 --> 00:00:24,032
What?

3
00:00:24,066 --> 00:00:25,699
I'm giving myself
dramatic entrance music.

4
00:00:25,734 --> 00:00:28,804
People will know I'm awesome
and to be feared.

5
00:00:28,838 --> 00:00:30,407
Right.

6
00:00:30,442 --> 00:00:32,745
There's nothing more awesome
and frightening than a man

7
00:00:32,779 --> 00:00:35,816
who's got music blasting
from between his nipples.

8
00:00:37,451 --> 00:00:39,820
Hey, Stuart,
what's going on?

9
00:00:39,854 --> 00:00:42,021

1
00:00:02,239 --> 00:00:04,172
Why do I always have to
carry the heavy stuff?

2
00:00:04,909 --> 00:00:05,676
Well, it's very simple.

3
00:00:05,710 --> 00:00:08,765
In our ragtag band of scientists
with nothing to lose,

4
00:00:08,800 --> 00:00:10,219
I'm the smart one,

5
00:00:10,254 --> 00:00:11,583
Wolowitz is the funny one,

6
00:00:11,618 --> 00:00:13,684
and Koothrappali
is the lovable foreigner

7
00:00:13,719 --> 00:00:16,183
who struggles to understand
our ways and fails.

8
00:00:18,486 --> 00:00:20,884
That leaves you,
by default, as the muscle.

9
00:00:20,919 --> 00:00:22,153
Oh.

1
00:00:02,191 --> 00:00:04,411
Okay in Avatar when
they gave sex in Pandora

2
00:00:04,691 --> 00:00:07,126
they hook up their ponytails,
so we know their ponytails

3
00:00:07,160 --> 00:00:09,862
are like their junk.

4
00:00:09,896 --> 00:00:11,497
Yeah... so?

5
00:00:11,531 --> 00:00:13,665
So, when they ride horses
and fly on the birds,

6
00:00:13,700 --> 00:00:15,034
they also use their ponytails.

7
00:00:15,068 --> 00:00:16,235
What's your point?

8
00:00:16,269 --> 00:00:18,637
My point is,
if I were a horse or a bird,

9
00:00:18,671 --> 00:00:20,873
I'd be very nervous
around James Cameron.

1
00:00:06,669 --> 00:00:09,072
Having a little trouble
catching your breath there?

2
00:00:10,705 --> 00:00:13,207
No, no, I'm good.

3
00:00:13,208 --> 00:00:15,043
If my P.E. teachers had told me
this is what I was training for,

4
00:00:15,236 --> 00:00:16,737
I would have tried
a lot harder.

5
00:00:16,738 --> 00:00:18,605
(laughing)

6
00:00:18,606 --> 00:00:22,843
"Do or do not.
There is no try."

7
00:00:25,113 --> 00:00:27,614
Did you just quote Star Wars?

8
00:00:27,615 --> 00:00:32,686
I believe I quoted
Empire Strikes Back.

9
00:00:34,889 --> 00:00:37,057
Oh, my God.

1
00:00:02,345 --> 00:00:05,814
Oh, damn, they canceled my Visa.

2
00:00:05,815 --> 00:00:09,583
(gasps)
Oh, yay, a new MasterCard!

3
00:00:09,584 --> 00:00:11,752
Uh-oh.

4
00:00:11,753 --> 00:00:12,886
What?

5
00:00:12,887 --> 00:00:14,788
I was going to get my mail.

6
00:00:14,789 --> 00:00:16,589
Okay.

7
00:00:18,258 --> 00:00:21,727
Are... are you hoping
to get it telepathically?

8
00:00:21,728 --> 00:00:24,582
I think you mean
telekinetically.

9
00:00:25,318 --> 00:00:26,423
And no.

10

1
00:00:02,790 --> 00:00:04,357
Hold.

2
00:00:04,358 --> 00:00:05,325
What?

3
00:00:05,326 --> 00:00:06,959
Explain your sneeze.

4
00:00:06,960 --> 00:00:08,661
I'm sorry?

5
00:00:08,662 --> 00:00:10,396
Do you have allergies?
No.

6
00:00:10,397 --> 00:00:11,930
Is there too much pepper
on your salad?

7
00:00:11,931 --> 00:00:13,065
I don't put pepper on salads.

8
00:00:13,066 --> 00:00:14,266
I've heard enough.
Sit over there.

9
00:00:14,267 --> 00:00:16,768
Oh, come on.

10

1
00:00:01,752 --> 00:00:04,287
Okay, Babydoll Pink, let's see
if you can cover up the fact

2
00:00:04,304 --> 00:00:06,438
that I got my dad's feet.

3
00:00:06,439 --> 00:00:08,507
It's just two degrees, Sheldon.

4
00:00:08,508 --> 00:00:10,908
I just want to turn up the
thermostat two degrees!

5
00:00:11,082 --> 00:00:14,185
Let me point out that two
degrees can be the difference

6
00:00:14,186 --> 00:00:16,220
between water and steam.

7
00:00:16,221 --> 00:00:18,455
Yes, if we lived in a teakettle.

8
00:00:18,456 --> 00:00:20,157
This is the temperature
you agreed to

9
00:00:20,158 --> 00:00:21,525
in the roommate agreement.

1
00:00:02,002 --> 00:00:03,737
Okay, we've got
power to the laser.

2
00:00:04,671 --> 00:00:06,839
I should've brought
an umbrella.

3
00:00:07,211 --> 00:00:08,511
What for?
It's not going to rain.

4
00:00:08,512 --> 00:00:11,047
I know that, but with
skin as fair as mine,

5
00:00:11,048 --> 00:00:14,450
moon burn is a
real possibility.

6
00:00:14,451 --> 00:00:16,151
That's a "bazinga," right?

7
00:00:16,152 --> 00:00:18,820
One of my best,
don't you think?

8
00:00:18,821 --> 00:00:20,354
(forced giggle)

9
00:00:21,796 --> 00:00:23,202