Schitt's Creek English Subtitles

1
00:00:28,362 --> 00:00:30,664
- Immigration?
- Revenue.

2
00:00:30,698 --> 00:00:33,834
Mrs. Rose! There are people
here from the government!

3
00:00:42,343 --> 00:00:44,445
I've been gutted!

4
00:00:44,478 --> 00:00:49,016
John, I've been stripped of every morsel
of pleasure I earned in this life!

5
00:00:49,049 --> 00:00:50,751
Well, how do you think
I feel, Moira?

6
00:00:50,784 --> 00:00:52,953
Eli was family,
for God's sake!

7
00:00:52,986 --> 00:00:54,955
"Leave your finances to me,"
he said!

8
00:00:54,988 --> 00:00:56,590
Son of a bitch!

9
00:00:56,624 --> 00:01:00,328

1
00:00:20,409 --> 00:00:21,544
Moira!
Hmm.

2
00:00:21,577 --> 00:00:23,148
Moira!

3
00:00:23,181 --> 00:00:26,721
Oh, no! I just finally
cried myself to sleep.

4
00:00:26,754 --> 00:00:28,091
The bed's soaking wet.

5
00:00:28,558 --> 00:00:30,162
Is it blood?

6
00:00:30,195 --> 00:00:31,997
No! There's a leak
in the ceiling.

7
00:00:32,031 --> 00:00:34,603
- There is a brown disgusting drip coming.
- Oh!

8
00:00:34,637 --> 00:00:37,176
Look at the...
Look at... Oh, my God.

9
00:00:37,209 --> 00:00:39,913
- I can't do it. I tried!

1
00:00:09,953 --> 00:00:12,993
So, this is the town limits?

2
00:00:13,027 --> 00:00:16,801
Yes, sir, 4,500 acres that ends
right here at the town sign.

3
00:00:16,834 --> 00:00:18,505
And it's all yours, Johnny.

4
00:00:18,538 --> 00:00:22,011
It must be a nice feeling,
considering you don't have a lot right now.

5
00:00:22,045 --> 00:00:24,150
You know, because of
the crooked business manager.

6
00:00:24,183 --> 00:00:25,252
You know, the money scandal...

7
00:00:25,285 --> 00:00:27,889
Yes, I know, I know,
I know, Ray.

8
00:00:29,993 --> 00:00:31,197
What the hell is this?

9
00:00:31,231 --> 00:00:33,135
The town sign.

1
00:00:22,356 --> 00:00:24,358
David?

2
00:00:24,392 --> 00:00:26,627
Can you come here please?

3
00:00:32,300 --> 00:00:34,135
David, can you come
in here please?

4
00:00:35,103 --> 00:00:36,170
What?

5
00:00:36,204 --> 00:00:37,538
Well, come in here
and I'll tell you.

6
00:00:37,571 --> 00:00:38,872
Well, why don't you just
tell me from there?

7
00:00:38,906 --> 00:00:40,141
- David...
- You could've already told me.

8
00:00:40,174 --> 00:00:41,542
I want to speak face to face.

9
00:00:41,575 --> 00:00:44,912
Motels this size,
we're basically always face to face.

1
00:00:09,077 --> 00:00:10,644
Oh, yeah!
Oh, yeah, yeah.

2
00:00:10,678 --> 00:00:12,946
Could you spare some a...
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!

3
00:00:12,980 --> 00:00:14,115
David!

4
00:00:14,148 --> 00:00:16,250
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.

5
00:00:16,284 --> 00:00:17,318
Oh, my God.

6
00:00:17,351 --> 00:00:18,386
Oh, my God, what's happening?

7
00:00:18,419 --> 00:00:19,887
I saw hell is
what's happening.

8
00:00:19,920 --> 00:00:20,988
Oh, my God.

9
00:00:21,021 --> 00:00:22,056
What?

1
00:00:07,041 --> 00:00:08,976
Hey, Moira, could you
turn that down, please?

2
00:00:09,009 --> 00:00:10,778
Important call coming through.

3
00:00:10,811 --> 00:00:13,181
Stevie says it's the guy
from the winery.

4
00:00:13,214 --> 00:00:15,449
Mmm...

5
00:00:19,720 --> 00:00:21,089
Hello, Johnny Rose.

6
00:00:21,855 --> 00:00:23,924
Hello? Hello?

7
00:00:25,759 --> 00:00:26,794
Ah!

8
00:00:28,796 --> 00:00:29,830
Stevie?

9
00:00:29,863 --> 00:00:31,699
- I put it through!
- Okay.

10

1
00:00:18,905 --> 00:00:20,975
Don't judge me for what I'm
about to ask you to do.

2
00:00:21,009 --> 00:00:22,579
Come inside, please.

3
00:00:22,613 --> 00:00:24,983
- What're you about to do?
- It does not matter. It doesn't matter.

4
00:00:25,017 --> 00:00:26,521
What?

5
00:00:27,556 --> 00:00:28,658
That.

6
00:00:29,660 --> 00:00:31,029
That's why you
called me in here?

7
00:00:31,063 --> 00:00:32,399
Yeah, look at it.

8
00:00:32,433 --> 00:00:34,403
- I'm looking.
- No, look at it.

9
00:00:34,437 --> 00:00:36,341
Uh, it looks like a bug...

1
00:00:07,775 --> 00:00:09,777
Mom, can you
come here, please?

2
00:00:10,978 --> 00:00:12,946
- What?
- I said, come here, please.

3
00:00:12,980 --> 00:00:14,082
You come here.

4
00:00:14,115 --> 00:00:16,217
We got a big box sent to us.

5
00:00:16,250 --> 00:00:17,751
- We did?
- It's a package.

6
00:00:17,785 --> 00:00:19,387
- Who's it from?
- I don't know.

7
00:00:19,420 --> 00:00:21,589
Oh! It's for me.

8
00:00:22,556 --> 00:00:23,891
"Thinking of you."

9
00:00:25,626 --> 00:00:27,761
"Dear M, hope this helps,

1
00:00:16,834 --> 00:00:19,640
Hi, Johnny.
Can we come in for a moment?

2
00:00:20,409 --> 00:00:22,113
Yes. Yes.

3
00:00:24,049 --> 00:00:25,719
Thank you.

4
00:00:25,752 --> 00:00:28,023
- Hello.
- Oh, hi.

5
00:00:28,057 --> 00:00:29,560
Is everything okay?

6
00:00:29,593 --> 00:00:31,464
We've got some sad news.

7
00:00:31,497 --> 00:00:34,737
Uh, someone very close
has died.

8
00:00:36,207 --> 00:00:37,676
- Oh.
- Sorry.

9
00:00:38,611 --> 00:00:40,215
You remember Bob?

1
00:00:08,451 --> 00:00:09,987
This was a good choice.

2
00:00:10,355 --> 00:00:11,924
Yep.

3
00:00:11,957 --> 00:00:13,628
- We make good choices.
- Mm-hmm.

4
00:00:13,661 --> 00:00:15,665
This was
a really healthy choice.

5
00:00:18,105 --> 00:00:19,940
Well, I'm gonna
go to work now.

6
00:00:19,973 --> 00:00:21,944
Okay.

7
00:00:21,977 --> 00:00:25,252
Which is where
I should've been

8
00:00:25,285 --> 00:00:26,287
Mm-hmm.

9
00:00:27,856 --> 00:00:29,360
Stevie?

1
00:00:06,747 --> 00:00:07,883
Ahhh!

2
00:00:07,916 --> 00:00:09,853
- Fuck me. Fuck me.
- What?

3
00:00:09,887 --> 00:00:10,989
- Fuck me!
- What?

4
00:00:11,023 --> 00:00:12,626
- John, there's something in the bed!
- What?

5
00:00:12,659 --> 00:00:14,530
Something crawled up my leg
and I can't see it!

6
00:00:14,563 --> 00:00:15,799
- What?
- I can't see it!

7
00:00:15,832 --> 00:00:18,138
- A spider?
- No! Something invisible like

8
00:00:18,171 --> 00:00:21,043
lice or scabies or
bed bugs!

9

1
00:00:06,140 --> 00:00:07,708
Nope. Nope.

2
00:00:07,741 --> 00:00:08,942
- Hmm?
- Nope. Nope.

3
00:00:08,976 --> 00:00:11,479
No. No. No.

4
00:00:11,512 --> 00:00:14,615
Kids, just came in to remind
you to keep Saturday open.

5
00:00:14,648 --> 00:00:16,217
What's Saturday?

6
00:00:16,250 --> 00:00:18,519
What's Saturday?
It's your mother's birthday.

7
00:00:18,552 --> 00:00:21,755
No, her birthday is
the second weekend in May.

8
00:00:21,789 --> 00:00:23,624
That's Mother's Day, honey.

9
00:00:23,657 --> 00:00:24,992
I don't think so.

1
00:00:47,363 --> 00:00:48,565
We're getting out!

2
00:00:51,504 --> 00:00:53,175
We're finally getting out!

3
00:00:54,777 --> 00:00:56,045
Oh, my God.

4
00:00:57,316 --> 00:00:58,518
I mean it!

5
00:01:05,232 --> 00:01:07,001
Oh, my... Oh, my God!

6
00:01:08,205 --> 00:01:09,373
Oh, my God!

7
00:01:14,783 --> 00:01:16,854
Told you I'd sell this town.
Didn't I tell you?

8
00:01:16,887 --> 00:01:18,491
Yes. Not to diminish
your accomplishment,

9
00:01:18,525 --> 00:01:20,060
but you did say that
a handful of times.

10