Rick and Morty - Third Season English Subtitles

1
00:00:01,735 --> 00:00:04,136
Rick: Anyway, that's how I
escaped from space prison!

2
00:00:04,171 --> 00:00:05,404
Oh, scary place.

3
00:00:05,439 --> 00:00:07,973
Wow, Rick! That's -- That's
one -- one heck of a story.

4
00:00:08,008 --> 00:00:10,142
I sure do wish I could have been
there to see it happen.
Oh, come on.

5
00:00:10,177 --> 00:00:13,078
Who wants to watch
a mad scientist use
handmade sci-fi tools

6
00:00:13,113 --> 00:00:15,047
to take out highly trained
alien guards

7
00:00:15,082 --> 00:00:17,082
when we can sit here
and be a family at Shoney's?

8
00:00:17,117 --> 00:00:19,985
Dad, it's great to have you
back, no matter where we are,

1
00:00:02,636 --> 00:00:04,381
Summer, next time we're hiding
in a Colorkian echo nest,

2
00:00:04,405 --> 00:00:06,538
can you do me a favor
and turn your ringer off?

3
00:00:06,574 --> 00:00:08,040
It's called "carpe diem,"
Morty.

4
00:00:08,075 --> 00:00:09,775
- Look it up.
- You look it up!

5
00:00:09,810 --> 00:00:11,054
Y-Y-You don't even... You don't
even know what it means!

6
00:00:11,078 --> 00:00:12,678
That's because
losers look stuff up

7
00:00:12,713 --> 00:00:15,314
while the rest of us
are carpin' all them diems.

8
00:00:15,349 --> 00:00:16,682
Listen to your sister, Morty.

9

1
00:00:02,002 --> 00:00:04,572
Rick: Morty?!

2
00:00:04,605 --> 00:00:06,240
Morty!
-Rick?

3
00:00:06,274 --> 00:00:08,709
-Hey, Morty?!
-Rick?

4
00:00:08,742 --> 00:00:11,412
Are you far away,
or are you inside something?

5
00:00:11,445 --> 00:00:13,081
Is this a camera?

6
00:00:13,114 --> 00:00:14,648
Is everything a camera?

7
00:00:14,682 --> 00:00:16,317
Rick:
Morty, the garage, Morty.

8
00:00:16,350 --> 00:00:18,319
Come to the garage!

9
00:00:18,352 --> 00:00:19,387
Morty?

1
00:00:01,402 --> 00:00:03,971
Rick: Don't let any of those
things get away, Morty.

2
00:00:04,004 --> 00:00:04,972
It their DNA gets
into Earth's food chain,

3
00:00:05,005 --> 00:00:06,840
our entire species
could be sterilized.

4
00:00:06,874 --> 00:00:08,309
Then why aren't we
killing them?

5
00:00:08,342 --> 00:00:09,810
Right, next time I need
a species sterilized,

6
00:00:09,843 --> 00:00:11,379
who's gonna do it for me,
you?

7
00:00:11,412 --> 00:00:12,980
[ Humming ]
Whoa! Rick!

8
00:00:13,013 --> 00:00:14,482
I-Is that
the Vindibeacon?

1
00:00:01,335 --> 00:00:02,570
[ Siren wails ]

2
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**

3
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[ Beeping, whirs ]

4
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**

5
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**

6
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[ Crying softly ]

7
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[ Sighs ]

8
00:00:25,793 --> 00:00:27,428
[ Gasps ]
Jerry!
Jerry, come on!

9
00:00:27,461 --> 00:00:28,996
We got to go!
You got to come with me, Jerry!

10

1
00:00:01,402 --> 00:00:03,237
[ Bell rings, lockers slam ]

2
00:00:03,271 --> 00:00:04,805
So, Jessica,
I heard you broke up with Brad.

3
00:00:04,838 --> 00:00:06,640
Who are you gonna date
now that you can date anyone?

4
00:00:06,674 --> 00:00:07,808
I don't know.

5
00:00:07,841 --> 00:00:10,678
I mean, obviously if someone
special comes along...

6
00:00:10,711 --> 00:00:13,247
B-But I mean
really special, like,

7
00:00:13,281 --> 00:00:15,649
nothing I've even remotely
considered in the past.

8
00:00:15,683 --> 00:00:18,152
Holy shit, holy shit,
holy shit.
I want that kind of love like
that docking kind of love.

1
00:00:02,536 --> 00:00:03,837
All right, Morty,
you ready for our adventure

2
00:00:03,871 --> 00:00:05,206
to the Lost City
of Atlantis?

3
00:00:05,239 --> 00:00:06,474
Ready as I'll ever be,
Rick.

4
00:00:06,507 --> 00:00:08,509
[ Portal opens ]
Oh, for fuck's sake.

5
00:00:08,542 --> 00:00:10,711
Hello, I'm Rick K-22.
This is my Morty.

6
00:00:10,744 --> 00:00:12,746
We're going from
reality to reality

7
00:00:12,780 --> 00:00:14,182
asking Ricks to contribute

8
00:00:14,215 --> 00:00:17,051
to the Citadel of Ricks
Redevelopment Fund.

9

1
00:00:01,769 --> 00:00:03,037
Morty, hurry!

2
00:00:03,071 --> 00:00:04,838
Return the Truth Tortoise!

3
00:00:04,872 --> 00:00:07,241
Morty, whatever you do,
don't drop the Truth Tortoise!

4
00:00:07,275 --> 00:00:08,542
Also really important,

5
00:00:08,576 --> 00:00:10,178
whatever you do,
don't look into its eyes!

6
00:00:10,211 --> 00:00:12,846
I -- I did look at it, Rick!
I've been looking at it!

7
00:00:12,880 --> 00:00:14,582
Now you're gonna know
everything, Morty!

8
00:00:14,615 --> 00:00:16,517
Good job! Way to go!
You fucked everything up!

9
00:00:16,550 --> 00:00:18,219
[ Speaking gibberish ]

1
00:00:03,070 --> 00:00:04,870
          News Anchor:
  In local news, child murderer
        Joseph Eli Lipnip

2
00:00:04,905 --> 00:00:06,805
   is scheduled to die tomorrow
       by lethal injection,

3
00:00:06,840 --> 00:00:09,508
  his execution already drawing
      dozens more spectators

4
00:00:09,543 --> 00:00:11,143
    than the death of TV news.
              Carla?

5
00:00:11,178 --> 00:00:13,512
     Carla Johnson: The man
   that once ate his own son...

6
00:00:13,547 --> 00:00:15,914
Wow. He's really getting
executed after all this time.
   ...is finally being put down

7
00:00:15,949 --> 00:00:17,349
           at the state
      correctional facility.

8
00:00:17,384 --> 00:00:18,483
  You know the son

1
00:00:02,569 --> 00:00:05,070
       Come on, football!
             Go, go!

2
00:00:07,240 --> 00:00:08,507
          Oh, come on.

3
00:00:08,542 --> 00:00:10,675
         Play football!

4
00:00:10,710 --> 00:00:13,678
   [ Suspenseful music plays ]

5
00:00:13,713 --> 00:00:15,347
   [ Creature growls softly ]

6
00:00:15,382 --> 00:00:18,016
     [ Heartbeat pounding ]

7
00:00:18,051 --> 00:00:19,584
       [ Creature snarls ]
              Aaah!

8
00:00:19,619 --> 00:00:20,752
           [ Slash! ]

9
00:00:20,787 --> 00:00:22,654
So, you're mining stuff
    to craft with

10