Rick and Morty - First Season English Subtitles

1
00:00:02,378 --> 00:00:03,209
[FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING]

2
00:00:03,295 --> 00:00:04,581
Morty, you got to come on.

3
00:00:04,672 --> 00:00:06,128
You got to come with me.

4
00:00:06,215 --> 00:00:07,046
What's going on?

5
00:00:07,132 --> 00:00:08,042
I got a surprise for you, Morty.

6
00:00:08,133 --> 00:00:08,918
It's the middle of the night.

7
00:00:09,009 --> 00:00:10,716
I got a surprise for you.

8
00:00:10,803 --> 00:00:11,713
Ow!

9
00:00:11,804 --> 00:00:13,590
Ow! You're tugging
me too hard.

10
00:00:13,681 --> 00:00:14,961
I got a surprise for you, Morty.

1
00:00:33,033 --> 00:00:34,969
TV: <i>Coin collecting is considered
the perfect hobby.</i>

2
00:00:34,993 --> 00:00:35,824
<i>...beautiful putt
right there...</i>

3
00:00:35,911 --> 00:00:36,742
<i>Good birdie.</i>

4
00:00:36,829 --> 00:00:39,116
<i>That's only the...
eighth birdie of the day.</i>

5
00:00:39,206 --> 00:00:40,617
What?

6
00:00:40,708 --> 00:00:41,748
Why are you looking at me?

7
00:00:41,834 --> 00:00:43,416
You want to go outside?

8
00:00:43,502 --> 00:00:44,708
Outside?

9
00:00:44,795 --> 00:00:45,956
[TV SHUTS OFF]

10

1
00:00:33,033 --> 00:00:35,525
♪ Last King Christmas
last arrived ♪

2
00:00:35,619 --> 00:00:37,610
♪ On the Christmas Christmas ♪

3
00:00:37,705 --> 00:00:38,820
[SNIFFS]

4
00:00:38,914 --> 00:00:40,075
Mmm.

5
00:00:40,165 --> 00:00:42,657
Jerry, you are really
giving it to this ham.

6
00:00:42,751 --> 00:00:44,867
[DEVICES BEEPING]

7
00:00:44,962 --> 00:00:46,373
Um, Merry Christmas.

8
00:00:46,463 --> 00:00:47,749
Hello?

9
00:00:47,840 --> 00:00:49,693
My parents are coming over
for the first time in years.

10

1
00:00:34,076 --> 00:00:36,067
T-T-T-This is just
sloppy craftsmanship.

2
00:00:36,161 --> 00:00:37,492
Hey, Rick.

3
00:00:37,579 --> 00:00:40,742
Boy, sure is really especially
beautiful out there today, huh?

4
00:00:40,833 --> 00:00:42,039
Oh, yes, Morty.

5
00:00:42,126 --> 00:00:43,912
L-it's almost unbelievable,
isn't it?

6
00:00:44,002 --> 00:00:45,037
Yeah, you know?

7
00:00:45,129 --> 00:00:46,356
There's something about the air

8
00:00:46,380 --> 00:00:47,996
and just the way the sunshine is.

9
00:00:48,090 --> 00:00:49,000
Uh, sure, buddy. Yeah.

10

1
00:00:34,118 --> 00:00:35,654
[PANTING]

2
00:00:35,744 --> 00:00:36,744
Run!

3
00:00:38,580 --> 00:00:39,580
[GASPS]

4
00:00:39,623 --> 00:00:41,205
Morty, do it!
Hit the button now!

5
00:00:41,291 --> 00:00:42,291
I can't do it, Rick!

6
00:00:42,334 --> 00:00:43,620
They're my parents and sister!

7
00:00:43,711 --> 00:00:45,146
Morty, I already told you...
It's not your family!

8
00:00:45,170 --> 00:00:47,036
They're clones from
an alternate reality,

9
00:00:47,131 --> 00:00:48,775
possessed by demonic alien
spirits from another

1
00:00:32,825 --> 00:00:34,135
PRINCIPAL:
<i>Principal Vagina here...</i>

2
00:00:34,159 --> 00:00:36,262
<i>Don't let the name fool you.
I'm very much in charge...</i>

3
00:00:36,286 --> 00:00:39,119
<i>Reminding you that tonight is
our annual Flu Season Dance.</i>

4
00:00:39,206 --> 00:00:41,163
<i>I don't know how many times
I have to say this,</i>

5
00:00:41,250 --> 00:00:43,116
<i>but if you have the flu,
stay home.</i>

6
00:00:43,210 --> 00:00:44,120
Hey.

7
00:00:44,211 --> 00:00:46,106
<i>The Flu Season Dance is about
awareness, not celebration.</i>

8
00:00:46,130 --> 00:00:47,461
[SIGHS]

9
00:00:47,548 --> 00:00:49,380

1
00:00:01,293 --> 00:00:03,751
RICK:
Look, I'm not paying 70 [BURPS] smidgens

2
00:00:03,837 --> 00:00:05,453
for a [BURPS] broken
defraculator.

3
00:00:05,547 --> 00:00:08,676
That is multiphase quantum
resonator.

4
00:00:08,759 --> 00:00:10,500
-Well, does it defraculate?
-Fuck no.

5
00:00:10,594 --> 00:00:12,505
Then... then... then
it's a broken defraculator.

6
00:00:12,596 --> 00:00:14,507
Like you would even know dick
about fraculation!

7
00:00:14,598 --> 00:00:16,214
Your planet just got cellphones,

8
00:00:16,308 --> 00:00:18,299
and the coverage still sucks!

9
00:00:18,394 --> 00:00:20,431

1
00:00:01,001 --> 00:00:04,244
[<i>DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS</i>]

2
00:00:04,338 --> 00:00:05,453
<i>Cynthia...</i>

3
00:00:05,547 --> 00:00:07,163
JERRY:
Oh, my god. No. No.

4
00:00:07,257 --> 00:00:09,168
-I told you.
-Hold on.

5
00:00:09,259 --> 00:00:11,170
<i>...will you please...</i>

6
00:00:11,261 --> 00:00:12,968
<i>not marry me?
I chose Veronica.</i>

7
00:00:13,055 --> 00:00:14,216
-What?!
-Yes!

8
00:00:14,306 --> 00:00:16,217
-Hold it.
-Why would he chose Veronica?

9
00:00:16,308 --> 00:00:17,890
Because he loves her?

1
00:00:01,001 --> 00:00:04,119
[POPPING]

2
00:00:04,213 --> 00:00:06,250
-[SIGHS]
-Hey, Rick.

3
00:00:06,340 --> 00:00:08,318
I have to make a project for
the science fair this weekend.

4
00:00:08,342 --> 00:00:09,924
You think you could help me out?

5
00:00:10,010 --> 00:00:11,730
-Whatever.
-Well, I mean, traditionally...

6
00:00:11,804 --> 00:00:14,171
science fairs are
a father-son thing.

7
00:00:14,264 --> 00:00:17,052
Well, scientifically,
traditions are an idiot thing.

8
00:00:17,142 --> 00:00:18,644
Morty, I think it would
be fun for you

9
00:00:18,727 --> 00:00:21,469

1
00:00:01,001 --> 00:00:03,663
BETH:
So, Dad, guess what tomorrow is.

2
00:00:03,754 --> 00:00:05,711
Martin Luther King
Jr.'s birthday.

3
00:00:05,798 --> 00:00:08,256
No.
Well, it... might be.

4
00:00:08,342 --> 00:00:09,423
-It is.
-Fine.

5
00:00:09,510 --> 00:00:12,172
But also, tomorrow is your
one-year anniversary

6
00:00:12,262 --> 00:00:13,548
back in our lives.

7
00:00:13,639 --> 00:00:15,846
I'm gonna make you
flying-saucer-shaped pancakes.

8
00:00:15,933 --> 00:00:17,594
Oh, t-t-there's no need
to do that, Beth.

9

1
00:00:01,001 --> 00:00:02,604
-SUMMER: Bye, mom! Bye, Dad!
-MORTY: Drive carefully!

2
00:00:02,628 --> 00:00:03,789
Have fun, you two.

3
00:00:03,879 --> 00:00:06,462
Yes, we will have as
much fun as possible on our...

4
00:00:06,548 --> 00:00:08,585
<i>Titanic</i>- themed getaway.

5
00:00:08,676 --> 00:00:10,462
Let's lose the 'tude, please.

6
00:00:10,552 --> 00:00:12,259
It's supposed to be romantic.

7
00:00:12,346 --> 00:00:14,586
Speaking of disasters, Dad,
we are leaving you in charge.

8
00:00:14,640 --> 00:00:16,256
I know, c-can we wrap this up?

9
00:00:16,350 --> 00:00:18,591
Morty and I [BURPS] have some
synthetic laser eels