Rick and Morty - First Season English Subtitles

1
00:00:02,378 --> 00:00:03,211
[ footsteps approaching ]

2
00:00:03,295 --> 00:00:04,587
Morty, you got to come on.

3
00:00:04,672 --> 00:00:06,130
You got to come with me.

4
00:00:06,215 --> 00:00:07,048
What's going on?

5
00:00:07,132 --> 00:00:08,049
I got a surprise for you, Morty.

6
00:00:08,133 --> 00:00:08,925
It's the middle of the night.

7
00:00:09,009 --> 00:00:10,718
I got a surprise for you.

8
00:00:10,803 --> 00:00:11,803
Ow!

9
00:00:11,804 --> 00:00:13,596
Ow! You're tugging
me too hard.

10
00:00:13,681 --> 00:00:14,961
I got a surprise for you, Morty.

1
00:00:33,033 --> 00:00:34,909
{\an8}TV: Coin collecting is considered
the perfect hobby.
 
 
 

2
00:00:34,993 --> 00:00:35,827
{\an8}Beautiful putt right there...
 
 
 

3
00:00:35,911 --> 00:00:36,744
{\an8}Good birdie.
 
 
 

4
00:00:36,829 --> 00:00:39,122
{\an8}That's only the...
eighth birdie of the day.
 
 
 

5
00:00:39,206 --> 00:00:40,623
{\an8}What?
 
 
 

6
00:00:40,708 --> 00:00:41,749
{\an8}Why are you looking at me?

1
00:00:33,033 --> 00:00:35,535
♪ Last King Christmas
last arrived ♪

2
00:00:35,619 --> 00:00:37,620
♪ On the Christmas Christmas ♪

3
00:00:37,705 --> 00:00:38,830
[ sniffs ]

4
00:00:38,914 --> 00:00:40,081
Mmm.

5
00:00:40,165 --> 00:00:42,667
{\an8}Jerry, you are really
giving it to this ham.
 
 
 

6
00:00:42,751 --> 00:00:44,877
{\an8}[ devices beeping ]
 
 
 

7
00:00:44,962 --> 00:00:46,379
{\an8}Um, Merry Christmas.
 
 
 

8

1
00:00:34,076 --> 00:00:36,077
T-T-T-This is just
sloppy craftsmanship.

2
00:00:36,161 --> 00:00:37,495
Hey, Rick.

3
00:00:37,579 --> 00:00:40,748
Boy, sure is really especially
beautiful out there today, huh?

4
00:00:40,833 --> 00:00:42,041
Oh, yes, Morty.

5
00:00:42,126 --> 00:00:43,918
I-It's almost unbelievable,
isn't it?

6
00:00:44,002 --> 00:00:45,044
Yeah, you know?

7
00:00:45,129 --> 00:00:46,369
{\an8}There's something about the air
 
 
 

8
00:00:46,380 --> 00:00:48,005
{\an8}and just the way the sunshine is.
 
 
 

1
00:00:34,118 --> 00:00:35,660
[ panting ]

2
00:00:35,744 --> 00:00:36,744
Run!

3
00:00:38,580 --> 00:00:39,580
[ gasps ]

4
00:00:39,623 --> 00:00:41,207
Morty, do it!
Hit the button now!

5
00:00:41,291 --> 00:00:42,291
I can't do it, Rick!

6
00:00:42,334 --> 00:00:43,626
They're my parents and sister!

7
00:00:43,711 --> 00:00:45,086
Morty, I already told you...
it's not your family!

8
00:00:45,170 --> 00:00:47,046
They're clones from
an alternate reality,

9
00:00:47,131 --> 00:00:48,715
possessed by demonic alien
spirits from another

1
00:00:32,825 --> 00:00:34,075
PRINCIPAL:
Principal Vagina here...

2
00:00:34,159 --> 00:00:36,202
Don't let the name fool you.
I'm very much in charge...

3
00:00:36,286 --> 00:00:39,122
reminding you that tonight is
our annual Flu Season Dance.

4
00:00:39,206 --> 00:00:41,165
I don't know how many times
I have to say this,

5
00:00:41,250 --> 00:00:43,126
but if you have the flu,
stay home.

6
00:00:43,210 --> 00:00:44,210
Hey.

7
00:00:44,211 --> 00:00:46,045
The Flu Season Dance is about
awareness, not celebration.

8
00:00:46,130 --> 00:00:47,463
[ sighs ]

9
00:00:47,548 --> 00:00:49,382

1
00:00:01,293 --> 00:00:03,753
RICK:
Look, I'm not paying 70 [burps] smidgens

2
00:00:03,837 --> 00:00:05,463
for a [burps] broken
defraculator.

3
00:00:05,547 --> 00:00:08,675
That is multiphase quantum
resonator.

4
00:00:08,759 --> 00:00:10,510
- Well, does it defraculate?
- Fuck no.

5
00:00:10,594 --> 00:00:12,512
Then... then... then
it's a broken defraculator.

6
00:00:12,596 --> 00:00:14,514
Like you would even know dick
about fraculation!

7
00:00:14,598 --> 00:00:16,224
Your planet just got cellphones,

8
00:00:16,308 --> 00:00:18,309
and the coverage still sucks!

9
00:00:18,394 --> 00:00:20,436

1
00:00:01,001 --> 00:00:04,253
[ dramatic music plays]

2
00:00:04,338 --> 00:00:05,463
Cynthia...

3
00:00:05,547 --> 00:00:07,173
JERRY:
Oh, my god. No. No.

4
00:00:07,257 --> 00:00:09,175
- I told you.
- Hold on.

5
00:00:09,259 --> 00:00:11,177
Will you please...

6
00:00:11,261 --> 00:00:12,970
not marry me?
I chose Veronica.

7
00:00:13,055 --> 00:00:14,222
- What?!
- Yes!

8
00:00:14,306 --> 00:00:16,224
- Called it.
- Why would he chose Veronica?

9
00:00:16,308 --> 00:00:17,892
Because he loves her?

1
00:00:01,001 --> 00:00:04,128
[ popping ]

2
00:00:04,213 --> 00:00:06,255
- [ sighs ]
- Hey, Rick.

3
00:00:06,340 --> 00:00:08,257
I have to make a project for
the science fair this weekend.

4
00:00:08,342 --> 00:00:09,926
You think you could help me out?

5
00:00:10,010 --> 00:00:11,730
- Whatever.
- Well, I mean, traditionally...

6
00:00:11,804 --> 00:00:14,180
science fairs are
a father-son thing.

7
00:00:14,264 --> 00:00:17,058
Well, scientifically,
traditions are an idiot thing.

8
00:00:17,142 --> 00:00:18,643
Morty, I think it would
be fun for you

9
00:00:18,727 --> 00:00:21,479

1
00:00:01,001 --> 00:00:03,670
BETH:
So, Dad, guess what tomorrow is.

2
00:00:03,754 --> 00:00:05,713
Martin Luther King
Jr.'s birthday.

3
00:00:05,798 --> 00:00:08,257
No.
Well, it... might be.

4
00:00:08,342 --> 00:00:09,425
- It is.
- Fine.

5
00:00:09,510 --> 00:00:12,178
But also, tomorrow is your
one-year anniversary

6
00:00:12,262 --> 00:00:13,554
back in our lives.

7
00:00:13,639 --> 00:00:15,848
I'm gonna make you
flying-saucer-shaped pancakes.

8
00:00:15,933 --> 00:00:17,600
Oh, t-t-there's no need
to do that, Beth.

9

1
00:00:01,001 --> 00:00:02,543
- SUMMER: Bye, mom! Bye, Dad!
- MORTY: Drive carefully!

2
00:00:02,628 --> 00:00:03,795
Have fun, you two.

3
00:00:03,879 --> 00:00:06,464
Yes, we will have as
much fun as possible on our...

4
00:00:06,548 --> 00:00:08,591
Titanic-themed getaway.

5
00:00:08,676 --> 00:00:10,468
Let's lose the 'tude, please.

6
00:00:10,552 --> 00:00:12,261
It's supposed to be romantic.

7
00:00:12,346 --> 00:00:14,586
Speaking of disasters, Dad,
we are leaving you in charge.

8
00:00:14,640 --> 00:00:16,265
I know, c-can we wrap
this up?

9
00:00:16,350 --> 00:00:18,601
Morty and I [burps] have some
synthetic laser eels