Rick and Morty - Fifth Season English Subtitles

1
00:00:07,810 --> 00:00:09,642
Come on, Rick. We're almost there.

2
00:00:09,729 --> 00:00:11,879
[GROANS] Leave me, Morty.
It's the only way.

3
00:00:12,439 --> 00:00:14,476
Wha… Were… Wha… Were we…

4
00:00:14,566 --> 00:00:16,609
Were we Blades in that one?
That's fucking tight.

5
00:00:16,693 --> 00:00:18,493
-Just stay with me.
-[CREATURE ROARS]

6
00:00:18,779 --> 00:00:20,979
I'm… I'm scared, Morty.
I can see the end.

7
00:00:21,948 --> 00:00:24,940
I'm a silly man. I'm a silly, small man.

8
00:00:25,035 --> 00:00:26,703
I'm… I'm sorry I got you into this.

9
00:00:26,787 --> 00:00:28,903
Then how about I get us out of this?

1
00:00:07,268 --> 00:00:08,435
[RICK, MORTY MUNCHING]

2
00:00:08,519 --> 00:00:10,385
-You two are hungry.
-It's a big day.

3
00:00:10,479 --> 00:00:11,896
-We're gonna kill God.
-Come again?

4
00:00:11,980 --> 00:00:14,190
Christian God is real, been
asleep for thousands of years.

5
00:00:14,274 --> 00:00:16,067
-We're gonna sneak up and kill him.
-Mob style.

6
00:00:16,151 --> 00:00:17,526
-Whack his ass.
-Can I kill God?

7
00:00:17,610 --> 00:00:18,566
-Fuck off.
-As if.

8
00:00:18,652 --> 00:00:19,569
Beth, do you hear this?

9
00:00:19,653 --> 00:00:22,321

1
00:00:07,918 --> 00:00:09,875
Ah, I love that new T-shirt smell.

2
00:00:09,962 --> 00:00:11,421
Chicks are gonna be all up in our biz

3
00:00:11,505 --> 00:00:13,590
when they see us wearing
these Rick and Morty custom tees.

4
00:00:13,674 --> 00:00:14,716
I bet we could sell these.

5
00:00:14,800 --> 00:00:16,926
-Hells, yeah. I fucking love merch!
-[THUNDER CRASHES]

6
00:00:17,010 --> 00:00:18,469
-The rain! It… It burns!
-Oh, shit.

7
00:00:18,553 --> 00:00:19,929
Quick, Morty, protect the shirts!

8
00:00:20,013 --> 00:00:22,220
The door! Open the door! Rick!

9
00:00:22,307 --> 00:00:24,100
Is it… Morty, will you stop trying to

10

1
00:00:08,202 --> 00:00:10,159
Mom! We're gonna miss the movie!

2
00:00:10,245 --> 00:00:12,580
-No, we're not.
-Okay, but we've been here for hours.

3
00:00:12,664 --> 00:00:14,915
I don't want to hang out
at the stupid horse hospital.

4
00:00:14,999 --> 00:00:17,376
The stupid horse hospital
puts dinner on your table.

5
00:00:17,460 --> 00:00:19,576
It wouldn't kill you to take an interest.

6
00:00:21,671 --> 00:00:22,832
What's this thing?

7
00:00:22,923 --> 00:00:25,133
In the middle of the room
with the hole in the end?

8
00:00:25,217 --> 00:00:27,760
BETH: That's a breeding mount.
The nurses use it to collect.

9
00:00:27,844 --> 00:00:29,710
Reproductive material.

1
00:00:09,010 --> 00:00:10,511
Jerry, can you watch the kids tonight?

2
00:00:10,595 --> 00:00:12,680
Someone played Barry White
over the racetrack speakers,

3
00:00:12,764 --> 00:00:14,891
-and now there's a seven-horse pregnancy.
-Oh, um…

4
00:00:14,975 --> 00:00:17,342
No, he can't watch
the kids, it's guys' night.

5
00:00:17,435 --> 00:00:19,145
How did you two start
having guys' nights?

6
00:00:19,229 --> 00:00:21,606
So now, you're complaining
that I like your stupid husband?

7
00:00:21,690 --> 00:00:23,772
No, I want you to like my stupid husband.

8
00:00:23,858 --> 00:00:25,484
-Aw.
-Well, then accept that Friday nights

9
00:00:25,568 --> 00:00:26,903

1
00:00:14,503 --> 00:00:16,463
Are we gonna put it back
when we're done with it?

2
00:00:16,547 --> 00:00:18,924
Why? The only thing of value
on it is the secret treasure map.

3
00:00:19,008 --> 00:00:21,009
The rest is just instructions
for running a country.

4
00:00:21,093 --> 00:00:23,512
-I'm pretty sure they're online.
-It just feels a little wrong.

5
00:00:23,596 --> 00:00:25,430
Morty, are you gonna
be a fucking America nerd

6
00:00:25,514 --> 00:00:28,714
or are you gonna be cool and
steal the Constitution with Grandpa?

7
00:00:31,103 --> 00:00:33,469
Here, hold this while I
crack the hermetic seal.

8
00:00:33,553 --> 00:00:35,003
Why not just use this again?

9

1
00:00:07,278 --> 00:00:10,191
♪ Boob world, Boob world ♪

2
00:00:10,281 --> 00:00:12,021
♪ It's a world for you ♪

3
00:00:12,115 --> 00:00:16,655
♪ But it's actually two Boob World ♪

4
00:00:16,745 --> 00:00:18,954
I gotta say, Morty, it's weird
that you wanted me to come,

5
00:00:19,038 --> 00:00:22,124
but I'm actually exstyched about it.
That's excited, stoked, and psyched.

6
00:00:22,208 --> 00:00:24,543
-I didn't want you to come. Talk to Rick.
-Truth is, Summer,

7
00:00:24,627 --> 00:00:28,129
Boob World's been at the center of
a few protests every day for 30 years,

8
00:00:28,213 --> 00:00:30,965
so they've recently rebranded as
a Boob Empowerment Experience,

9
00:00:31,049 --> 00:00:32,800
and if we bring a

1
00:00:07,723 --> 00:00:08,804
BETH: No parties.

2
00:00:08,890 --> 00:00:11,433
There's cookies in the cupboard,
emergency numbers on the fridge.

3
00:00:11,517 --> 00:00:12,803
Yeah, yeah. Wait, what?

4
00:00:12,893 --> 00:00:15,353
"Emergency numbers on the fridge"?
What does that even mean?

5
00:00:15,437 --> 00:00:16,893
Honestly, I don't even know.

6
00:00:16,980 --> 00:00:19,314
I've seen so many movies that
start with the parents leaving,

7
00:00:19,398 --> 00:00:20,351
it popped out of my mouth.

8
00:00:20,435 --> 00:00:22,191
Are you sure you don't
want to come with us?

9
00:00:22,275 --> 00:00:24,522
No. I've got a million
things I've been putting off.

1
00:00:08,899 --> 00:00:11,937
It came as a shock to many,
but with the power vacuum left

2
00:00:12,027 --> 00:00:13,819
by the heartless
consumption of our dictator,

3
00:00:13,903 --> 00:00:16,235
we shall impose even
more Draconian cookie law,

4
00:00:16,322 --> 00:00:17,812
one be-cookie-ing at a time!

5
00:00:17,907 --> 00:00:20,023
[ALL SCREAMING]

6
00:00:21,202 --> 00:00:25,070
Oh, thank you! They took power immediately
after you and your grandpa left.

7
00:00:25,164 --> 00:00:26,746
Uh, sorry about that.

8
00:00:26,832 --> 00:00:29,209
Rick doesn't do transition plans.
I think he was just hungry.

9
00:00:29,293 --> 00:00:33,912
Well, now with you here, perhaps a

1
00:00:07,099 --> 00:00:10,637
[DISTANT SCREAMING]

2
00:00:11,269 --> 00:00:13,430
[WOMAN YELPS]

3
00:00:15,022 --> 00:00:16,604
It's the Crow Man!

4
00:00:16,690 --> 00:00:17,976
[CROW CAWING]

5
00:00:19,401 --> 00:00:20,357
[BURPS]

6
00:00:23,321 --> 00:00:26,071
Give it a second.
Maybe he's taking it out to surrender.

7
00:00:26,950 --> 00:00:28,065
[CROW CAWING]

8
00:00:35,040 --> 00:00:36,622
He's anti-heroic! Run!

9
00:00:36,708 --> 00:00:38,619
-[CROWD SCREAMING]
-I don't understand.

10
00:00:38,710 --> 00:00:40,040