Anger Management - First Season English Subtitles

1
00:00:01,620 --> 00:00:04,080
You can't fire me, I quit.

2
00:00:04,630 --> 00:00:06,130
Think you can replace me
with some other guy?

3
00:00:06,210 --> 00:00:08,670
Go ahead, it won't be the same.

4
00:00:08,960 --> 00:00:11,460
You may think I'm losing,
but I'm not. I'm...

5
00:00:11,550 --> 00:00:13,380
Anyway, you get the idea.

6
00:00:15,220 --> 00:00:16,800
And those are just some generic examples

7
00:00:16,890 --> 00:00:20,470
of frustrations you can take out on Bobo,
our new bopping bag,

8
00:00:20,560 --> 00:00:22,560
to express your anger in a healthy way.

9
00:00:22,640 --> 00:00:24,640
Okay, our new member should be
showing up any minute,

1
00:00:02,040 --> 00:00:04,330
Okay, I'm gonna order us some drinks.
What can I get you?

2
00:00:04,500 --> 00:00:07,670
Anything blue. Or yellow.

3
00:00:07,920 --> 00:00:09,380
On the off chance they don't have either,

4
00:00:09,460 --> 00:00:11,210
is there another primary color
I can get for you?

5
00:00:12,260 --> 00:00:13,380
Pink.

6
00:00:13,720 --> 00:00:15,550
Be right back.

7
00:00:16,550 --> 00:00:17,600
How's your date going?

8
00:00:17,930 --> 00:00:23,520
She would like a blue drink
or a yellow drink or a pink drink.

9
00:00:24,350 --> 00:00:26,860
You want me to put it in a sippy cup?

10

1
00:00:01,580 --> 00:00:02,660
Just going to drop her on the couch.

2
00:00:02,750 --> 00:00:06,540
Okay. I'll pick her up tomorrow.

3
00:00:06,750 --> 00:00:08,710
You're not driving home until you
have another cup of coffee.

4
00:00:08,800 --> 00:00:12,300
Hey, don't worry about whispering.
She slept through everything.

5
00:00:12,470 --> 00:00:16,010
Jet engines, turbulence,
bipolar flight attendants.

6
00:00:16,100 --> 00:00:18,640
I hate her so much. I hate you!

7
00:00:20,140 --> 00:00:22,180
No, I don't. I love you.

8
00:00:24,230 --> 00:00:25,690
I resent her youth.

9
00:00:26,980 --> 00:00:28,650
Coffee may not be the answer.

10

1
00:00:01,350 --> 00:00:03,600
Then my wife bought a TV recorder

2
00:00:03,680 --> 00:00:06,440
so she could fast-forward
past the commercials.

3
00:00:06,600 --> 00:00:07,850
Well, I like commercials.

4
00:00:07,940 --> 00:00:09,900
They tell me what to buy.

5
00:00:09,980 --> 00:00:12,110
I'd tell you to buy another TV, Ed,

6
00:00:12,190 --> 00:00:13,400
but I guess you wouldn't know
which one to get

7
00:00:13,490 --> 00:00:15,240
since you haven't seen the commercials.

8
00:00:15,820 --> 00:00:18,570
I don't know what's new,
I don't know what's improved,

9
00:00:18,660 --> 00:00:20,820
I don't know what's for
a limited time only...

1
00:00:01,810 --> 00:00:03,720
So, Patrick, this brings
up a good question.

2
00:00:03,890 --> 00:00:06,810
How does a pile of your boyfriend's
clothes end up on fire?

3
00:00:07,730 --> 00:00:11,770
I know that one.
You catch him staring at your sister's ass.

4
00:00:12,690 --> 00:00:15,150
I'm pretty sure that wasn't
Patrick's problem, Lacey.

5
00:00:15,450 --> 00:00:18,410
It's very simple.
My mother, God rest her soul,

6
00:00:18,490 --> 00:00:23,120
always said that the best way to get gum
out of an angora sweater is with kerosene.

7
00:00:23,200 --> 00:00:25,250
Lots and lots of kerosene.

8
00:00:25,620 --> 00:00:27,710
Sure, and napalm gets out red wine.

9
00:00:29,290 --> 00:00:32,800

1
00:00:01,310 --> 00:00:03,270
Okay. Who would like to start today?

2
00:00:03,350 --> 00:00:05,230
I would.

3
00:00:05,310 --> 00:00:07,640
What's with the attitude?

4
00:00:07,810 --> 00:00:09,310
It's a splint.

5
00:00:09,400 --> 00:00:11,570
I broke my finger last
night because of you.

6
00:00:11,650 --> 00:00:13,610
See, everybody?

7
00:00:14,860 --> 00:00:16,780
And how exactly was I involved in that?

8
00:00:16,860 --> 00:00:18,240
You didn't answer your phone.

9
00:00:18,320 --> 00:00:20,450
I was in line at a club when some
dog-faced bitch

10
00:00:20,530 --> 00:00:23,410

1
00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:03,540
Let's move on. (CLEARS THROAT)

2
00:00:04,500 --> 00:00:05,790
Donovan, I know that you and Cleo

3
00:00:05,880 --> 00:00:08,550
had some words about how much time
you've been spending in the library.

4
00:00:08,630 --> 00:00:10,300
- So do you want to talk about that?
- DONOVAN: Yes.

5
00:00:10,380 --> 00:00:12,550
Cleo has been real supportive lately.

6
00:00:12,630 --> 00:00:14,550
He knows that I have to get my law degree

7
00:00:14,640 --> 00:00:17,640
so I can prove beyond a shadow of a doubt
that I'm innocent.

8
00:00:17,720 --> 00:00:22,310
They have you on videotape stabbing
three people at a Relax The Back store.

9
00:00:22,690 --> 00:00:25,270
I ain't said it was going to be easy.

1
00:00:02,640 --> 00:00:03,770
Charlie, are you in there?

2
00:00:04,480 --> 00:00:06,140
What? I'm in the shower.

3
00:00:06,600 --> 00:00:10,440
- What?
- What?

4
00:00:11,020 --> 00:00:12,820
Damn it.

5
00:00:12,900 --> 00:00:14,320
What the hell? I'm naked.

6
00:00:14,490 --> 00:00:16,820
You better have
a fistful of singles or get out.

7
00:00:16,910 --> 00:00:20,620
Yeah, whatever. You couldn't hear me.
Now don't look. I gotta pee.

8
00:00:21,530 --> 00:00:23,490
There's two other bathrooms in this house.

9
00:00:23,870 --> 00:00:26,710
Yeah, well, I'm in a hurry
and I got to talk to you.

1
00:00:00,890 --> 00:00:03,390
So, Ed, I know recently you've been
having some anger

2
00:00:03,480 --> 00:00:07,060
over not being able to find a
post-retirement job. How's that going?

3
00:00:07,150 --> 00:00:12,230
I worked 45 years supervising
200 people in waste management.

4
00:00:12,320 --> 00:00:15,820
And I can't even get a job
as a Walmart greeter.

5
00:00:15,900 --> 00:00:20,910
And they hire handicaps and whatever
else tumbles off the short bus.

6
00:00:22,040 --> 00:00:24,700
I'd like to say something
as a person with a job.

7
00:00:24,790 --> 00:00:26,290
You're lucky not to have one.

8
00:00:26,370 --> 00:00:29,420
I'd trade places with you in a second if
you weren't a creepy old man.

9

1
00:00:01,580 --> 00:00:07,170
So, Ed, I guess you decided to dance on the
edge of the knife and go back to Starbucks.

2
00:00:07,710 --> 00:00:09,460
I did what you said.

3
00:00:09,550 --> 00:00:12,510
I ordered my coffee, gave them my name,

4
00:00:12,590 --> 00:00:15,590
and stepped to the side
like the rest of the morons.

5
00:00:17,430 --> 00:00:19,140
You've come a long way.

6
00:00:19,220 --> 00:00:24,560
That is a far cry from threatening to
"shove a bean grinder up a barista's ass."

7
00:00:26,400 --> 00:00:29,520
I know, I know. I'm late,
but it's not my fault.

8
00:00:29,610 --> 00:00:32,740
I'm driving down the freeway, and this
jerk-off cuts right in front of me.

9
00:00:32,860 --> 00:00:35,740
Luckily, I drifted into the other lane